Monday Evening Open Thread: Welcome Back, Charlie!

(Mike Thompson via
For those of us who delight in the arts of verbal knifework, even a November Monday can’t be so bad when it heralds the blogging return of Mr. Charles P. Pierce:

Over on ABC, old pal Martha Raddatz was sitting in for The Clinton Guy Horrified By Blowjobs. Among other people, she hosted New York Congressman Peter Cuchulainn Pearse McDonagh Clarke Kathleen ni Houlihan King, the famous former apologist for gunmen, to talk about terrorism. As it happens, Peter is only the second-most ridiculous congresscritter named King, Steve having been re-elected in Iowa despite the best efforts of the brown people who hide under his bed. P. King was quick to jump into the Benghazicuzzi because he hates any and all terrorists who don’t know all the words to “The Wind that Shakes the Barley.” He believes that Susan Rice had an obligation to the Republic to liven up The Sunday Shows by revealing classified information. Coming Up Next: The Daniel Ellsberg Hour!

And again:

Now, ordinarily, the second banana on a campaign so thoroughly inept as the Romney campaign would find himself exiled to the remainder table of history about 11 seconds after the polls closed, especially a second banana like Ryan, who brought nothing to the ticket whatsoever, and could deliver neither his home state or his hometown. In terms of their relative contributions to the overall effort of their respective campaigns, compared to Paul Ryan, Sarah Palin was Boss Tweed. But, as Kilgore shrewdly points out, Ryan maintains a constituency within the Beltway that seems rather impervious to the demonstrable fact that, as a national politician, Paul Ryan makes a terrific doorstop…

But here’s the thing. Assuming that actual journalism breaks out at any point within the Beltway, it’s going to take much more heavy lifting to recreate Ryan’s image than it took to build it in the first place. In the campaign that just ended, Paul Ryan was exposed as a thoroughgoing lightweight, both as a politician and as a policy thinker. As a national candidate, to borrow an old phrase from Bob Knight, Ryan couldn’t lead a whore to bed. (Judging by the appearance schedule that the Romney people handed Ryan late in the campaign, Ryan seemed to be running against Alexander Hamilton Stephens for vice-president of the Confederate States Of America.) And, removed from the warm cocoon of Beltway wisdom in which they were nurtured, his vaunted “ideas” fell all to pieces around him as the country repeatedly demonstrated that it didn’t believe a word of what he was saying and had no intention of buying what he was selling. By the time Joe Biden got finished laughing at him, Ryan looked like someone groping madly for the bottom of the pool with the tips of his toes…


Apart from enjoying a soothing paddle in the vitriol vat, what’s on the agenda for the evening?

68 replies
  1. 1
    dmsilev says:

    A nice soothing concert tonight, which is good because tomorrow I deal with the 4th Circle of Hell (aka O’Hare airport).

  2. 2
    AA+ Bonds says:

    Jesus Christ does that cartoon ever need to get rid of the completely extraneous line at the bottom.

    Get rid of that claptrap and it’s genuinely emotionally compelling.

  3. 3
    SteveinSC says:

    I love it. More vitriol, more vat. And couldn’t “lead a whore to bed”–even with that Number 90X body. I also love the new moniker “The Confederate/Cow Party”, formerly the GOP.

  4. 4
    mainmati says:

    Never get tired of this verbal polymath and hilarious scourge of the Right that is our Charles.

  5. 5
    Keith G says:

    Earlier today, I roasted an 8 pound hen (as in chicken)as part of a luncheon we put together for a local non-profit AIDS hospice.

    After clean up, the carcass came home and is in a stock pot along with many other soon to be tasty things. It’s gonna be a nice November evening.

  6. 6
    BGinCHI says:

    @dmsilev: We head to Midway early tomorrow. It’s gonna be a circus.

    Denver and the mountains for us, with friends for the holiday. Looking forward to some altitude.

  7. 7
    R-Jud says:

    @dmsilev: I’ll be in the fifth circle– Newark Liberty.

  8. 8
    NotMax says:

    Ditch the agenda; go with the flow.

  9. 9
    dmsilev says:

    @BGinCHI: I normally fly out of Midway, as it’s a lot more convenient to get to, but United turned out to be something like $150 or $200 cheaper than Southwest. For that kind of money, I’ll cope with O’Hare.

  10. 10
    Phylllis says:

    Leftovers for supper and likely early to bed. We’re on the road Wednesday to Columbus GA, which means a drive through the 5th circle of hell, I285 around the ATL.

  11. 11
    WereBear says:

    We are traveling, but only to the next town. Another “orphaned” couple and ourselves will be heading for a local buffet. A lot more goodies than my tiny kitchen could produce!

  12. 12
    wrb says:


    Keep your eye out for my wallet. I lost it at O’Hare last spring.

  13. 13
    Maude says:

    Once I got dropped off at the wrong terminal at Logan. It was a dead run to the right terminal to catch my flight.
    Newark isn’t as bad as herpes.

  14. 14
    R-Jud says:

    @Maude: You got herpes running to the terminal? Jesus, that is a rough airport.

  15. 15
    BGinCHI says:

    @dmsilev: For travel with wee one, hard to beat SW. Safe travels.

  16. 16
    Cassidy says:

    @AA+ Bonds: You are insufferably judgmental and whiny. You must be a thrilling dinner guest.

    Last class before thanksgiving break tonight. We start woodland firefighting.

  17. 17
    Spaghetti Lee says:


  18. 18
    Comrade Mary says:

    @SteveinSC: Yep, as far as vaguely weaselly/wolfish looking little brunettes go, Ryan is no James “i pretty much fall in love for 45 minutes a day every day with whoever is letting me touch their genitals” Deen. Ahem.

    (Link above is to a wall of text at Reddit and is probably work safe. Any other Googling re Mr. Deen is at your own risk.)

  19. 19
    dmsilev says:

    @BGinCHI: Best of luck to you. Is this the first trip with the wee one?

  20. 20
    Maude says:

    I used to live dangerously.

  21. 21
    kindness says:

    Charlie Pierce was missed. God love you all who put your asses (and time) on the line for we, the unkept hoard. But Charlie, I missed.

  22. 22
    Jay C says:


    If it’s Newark: you’d be lucky if herpes was the only thing you got….

  23. 23
    NotMax says:


    I used to live dangerously.

    I likely did, as well, back in the late 60s and early 70s.

    But the details are kind of hazy.

  24. 24
    Maude says:

    Lost decades? Ain’t it great. Can’t have regrets if you can’t remember.

  25. 25
    gogol's wife says:

    I am so happy not to be going anywhere. I am exhausted and need to just sit around and grade papers. TCM is showing Shirley Temple’s version of Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm on Thanksgiving morning, so I’m stoked (as my students would say, although not about Shirley Temple). I’m making a simple but I hope tasty meal for just the two of us.

    ETA: Forgot to do the italics on the film title.

  26. 26
    Violet says:

    I’ve got to start cooking tomorrow. Ugh. I’m tired and don’t feel like it, but duty calls.

  27. 27
    Yutsano says:

    @Cassidy: I was going to suggest a sternly worded letter to the cartoonist voicing displeasure, but AA is just a Republican ratfucker anyway. So I just walk on by.

  28. 28
    AA+ Bonds says:


    Are you seriously going to tell me that you don’t think political cartoons nowadays have too many captions?

  29. 29
    AA+ Bonds says:

    Shit like what is obviously Netanyahu holding a club and then the club has “IDF” written on it, and maybe “Mossad” on a second line? That’s some stone cold shit right there, cartoons for dummies. If I were working at a paper, I would cut and paste to mix and match them, leave Bibi holding “Low World Series Ratings” or whatever.

  30. 30
    Yutsano says:

    Oh and driving home Wednesday. Gas tank already full and the freeways are flooding right now. This could get entertaining.

  31. 31
    Corner Stone says:


    Denver and the mountains for us, with friends for the holiday. Looking forward to some altitude.

    So you’re going for a little recreation?

  32. 32
    jeffreyw says:

    I’m gonna eat these sliders then I’m gonna .. dunno, take a nap in front of the TV?

  33. 33
    Corner Stone says:

    @AA+ Bonds: Shorter AA+:
    “And what’s the deal with airline food?”

  34. 34
    eemom says:

    @AA+ Bonds:

    Are you seriously going to tell me that you don’t think political cartoons nowadays have too many captions?

    For Christmas this year, plz ask Santa to bring you a life. kthxbai.

  35. 35
    Ben Franklin says:

    It is a mystery why Obama keeps repeating ‘Israel’s right to defend…’ without a mention of the Palestinian rights to same. Is he still running from the ‘natural born’ meme and the legacy of his Father? Yes, he has to get the ‘fiscal’ deal done, but is he getting any cooperation which merits such an omission?

  36. 36
  37. 37
    R-Jud says:

    @Jay C: We shrink-wrap ourselves in plastic from the neck down when we’re going to be passing through there. Also prevents in-flight bloating!

  38. 38
    Felonius Monk says:

    @gogol’s wife:

    Forgot to do the italics on the film title.

    The Inspector General and all the dead souls forgive you your trespass. :)
    Enjoy your holiday.

  39. 39
    BillinGlendaleCA says:

    We’re starting a new tradition where the wife is cooking yummy Korean chicken soup with sides on even years, so I don’t have to cook this year. The kid’s going to bring the BF over for the first time. Time to get the lie detector out of storage.

  40. 40
    Michael says:

    @AA+ Bonds: moving the goalposts…

  41. 41
    Platonicspoof says:

    @AA+ Bonds:
    Think of it as closed-captioning for the 27%.


  42. 42
    Michael says:

    @AA+ Bonds: also, this is a weird axe to grind

  43. 43
    the Conster says:

    @AA+ Bonds:

    I liked you way better before your downgrade.

  44. 44
    Rosie Outlook says:

    We’re going OUT for Thanksgiving , so I will really have something to be thankful for, as I hate to cook. And a happy Thanksgiving to you all!

  45. 45
    burnspbesq says:

    Peter King is a nasty piece of business, but one man’s terrorist is another man’s freedom fighter, and if Pierce means to say that the people of Ulster didn’t have legitimate grievances against Westminster, he can just go fuck himself.

  46. 46
    Rosie Outlook says:

    Oops. I almost forgot. While we’re being thankful, today is World Toilet Day. And if indoor plumbing isn’t something to be thankful for, I don’t know what would be.

  47. 47
    burnspbesq says:


    It’s all about your frame of reference. I used to hate O’Hare, until I had to fly in and out of Bangalore.

  48. 48
    WereBear says:

    @Rosie Outlook: I used to spend summers on my grandparent’s farm. It had indoor plumbing, but also an outhouse and about thirty years worth of Reader’s Digests.

    I used to sneak the ones with interesting articles out into the sunlight, where they became tolerable enough to read before they fell apart like old sea treasures brought up from the depths.

  49. 49
    Mnemosyne says:

    Argh. We passed out the names for our office Secret Santa today and now I’m one short. Either someone took two (though no one has fessed up so far) or someone who told me they were not going to participate changed their minds and took a name anyway.

    This is the sucky part of trying to run office parties.

  50. 50
    burnspbesq says:

    My favorite airport in the entire world is Devonport, Tasmania. Baggage claim? They open the metal rollup door at the end of the terminal, and a tractor pushes a flatbed with the bags on it through the door.

    Galway, Ireland is a close second.

  51. 51
    feebog says:

    Going to be a quiet night with the spousal unit who is recovering from sinus surgery. She was doing fine but then started hemmoraging last Monday. She was up and about and doing quite well until then. But I guess having a five inch stick stuck up your nose and then two yards of packing to hold it in will take it out of you. Hope she is feeling well enough to do Thanksgiving ath the inlaws.

  52. 52
    Mnemosyne says:

    @AA+ Bonds:

    Are you seriously going to tell me that you don’t think political cartoons nowadays have too many captions?

    Yes, let’s go back to the “good old days” when political cartoonists were sparing with their text.

  53. 53
    g says:

    Good to see Charlie up and running again.

  54. 54
  55. 55
    Rosie Outlook says:

    @WereBear: Iearned more than I cared to know about outhouses when I spent a season in hell–er, eastern Kentucky . 35 years ago the region was third-worldish. I wonder what it’s like now.

  56. 56
    Central Planning says:

    Well, this made me chuckle: Biden gives 17-year-old exclusive ride

    “A 17-year-old high schooler and the Vice President of the United States could end up being “best friends forever” after Biden surprised the young lady with the ultimate offer – and the pictures to prove it.”

    I guess Biden is “all that”

  57. 57
    Central Planning says:

    And holy crap, I just read the rest of that article. With some creative/selective deletion of parts of that article, you could have a pretty smutty story.

  58. 58
    gnomedad says:

    Via the GOS, he’s baaaaack

  59. 59
    Karmus says:


    Best holiday wishes to you and your spousal unit.

  60. 60
    Maude says:

    Poor baby. I hope she can sleep.
    She may not feel like going out and having to be social Thursday.

  61. 61
    Origuy says:

    @Rosie Outlook: We had an “outdoor bath with a path” in southern Indiana until I was 5 or so. My dad had bought a century-old farmhouse outside of Bloomington with the intention of fixing it up. Which he did, until it burned down when I was 7. My mom never liked that place.

  62. 62
    wrb says:

    We still depend on an outhouse.

    Never seen a reason to spend money for a shitter with less of a view, and fewer sweet-smelling plants.

  63. 63

    Am I the only one who, upon reading the name Charlie in the title of this post and thought, “In what respect, Charlie?”

  64. 64
    Cmm says:

    @Central Planning:

    I totally expected it to be another in the series of Onion stories about joe Biden with him giving her a ride in his trans am…

  65. 65
    Brother Shotgun of Sweet Reason says:

    Finished my unpaid overtime, now I’m wondering if a glass of wine will stimulate the head cold I’ve been fighting off. Picking up my son from college at BWI on Wednesday and driving to New York (Rockland County). The back way on I-78 and I-278, and not that devil’s armpit of an I-95, thank FSM.

  66. 66
    Joey Maloney says:

    I’m worried about my cat, Isadore. She’s lost her appetite and she’s hiding. I’m going to have to take her to the vet after work if she hasn’t perked up by then.

  67. 67
    tybee says:

    @Phylllis: Muscogee County!

    i spent my malformative years there…

  68. 68
    Cassidy says:

    @AA+ Bonds: Eh, to each his own. Just saying you always have something negative to say. It’s a good cartoon. Could it be better, sure, I guess. Life is too damn short to be that negative all the time.

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