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You are here: Home / Open Threads / Majors and generals

Majors and generals

by DougJ|  November 13, 20125:49 pm| 152 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads, Green Balloons

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If you outlaw inappropriate emails, only outlaws will send inappropriate emails. Discuss.

Should I care at all about any of this stuff? Because I don’t.

So feel free to talk about something else.

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Previous Post: « Petraeus Scandal: It wasn’t 30,000 emails, you guys. Get a grip.
Next Post: Electronic Privacy »

Reader Interactions

152Comments

  1. 1.

    Politically Lost

    November 13, 2012 at 5:50 pm

    “Should I care at all about any of this stuff? ”

    Yes, because BENGHAZI!!!!

  2. 2.

    schrodinger's cat

    November 13, 2012 at 5:51 pm

    How was the meet-up? And we can has pictures?

  3. 3.

    Metrosexual Manichean Monster DougJ

    November 13, 2012 at 5:52 pm

    @schrodinger’s cat:

    I’ll have pics up soon!

  4. 4.

    schrodinger's cat

    November 13, 2012 at 5:53 pm

    Our Low rent Always Wrong Bill Kristol is here!

  5. 5.

    Yutsano

    November 13, 2012 at 5:54 pm

    Green balloons. That is all.

  6. 6.

    Ann Rynd

    November 13, 2012 at 5:54 pm

    john Podhoretz uses the word “Goopy.” Grover Norquist says “Poopy Head.” Do these guys ever grow up?

  7. 7.

    trollhattan

    November 13, 2012 at 5:55 pm

    Noted at home while the radio was droning on about the whole thing, that if it were France or Italy, they’d probably look at her pics, nod their understanding and go about their business. We’re not wired that way (and he bloody well knows that).

    However, since a large contingent has been paving Petraeus a private road to elected office the last several years, I’m relieved that effort now seems defunct.

  8. 8.

    arguingwithsignposts

    November 13, 2012 at 5:55 pm

    @Yutsano: Amen!

  9. 9.

    Valdivia

    November 13, 2012 at 5:56 pm

    @Yutsano:

    co-sign. At this point we are beyond Jerry Springer territory.

  10. 10.

    Schlemizel

    November 13, 2012 at 5:56 pm

    I have reduced respect for people who chose the cheat on their spouses. As much AS I love the big dog his actions are always a black mark in my book. But the big divide to me is did it affect the job? If it does not hurt the performance of the job then it is nobodies business but his wife’s & the Hairy Thunderer he pretends to pray to

  11. 11.

    Just Some Fuckhead

    November 13, 2012 at 5:57 pm

    I don’t even pretend to understand Milfgate, or why it matters.

  12. 12.

    YellowJournalism

    November 13, 2012 at 5:58 pm

    @Ann Rynd: Personally, I always found Romney to be more of a doody head rather than a poopy head. It’s a fine line, as most of you probably know.

    My favorite part of the “poopy head” clip is the exasperated tone in her voice and the admonishing look on the interviewer’s face as she told him that Obama never said that.

  13. 13.

    Chris

    November 13, 2012 at 5:59 pm

    If you outlaw inappropriate emails, only outlaws will send inappropriate emails.

    Inappropriate emails don’t fire people.

    FUCKING BENGHAZI COVER-UPING LIBERAL FAGGOTS fire people.

    Wat?

  14. 14.

    Alexandra

    November 13, 2012 at 6:01 pm

    I don’t care about it either… except if it demythologises and takes another wingnut hero off the playing field, all the better.

  15. 15.

    Comrade Mary

    November 13, 2012 at 6:01 pm

    Yay! Much better earworm, even transposed.

    (Spot the rare Virgin in the room!)

  16. 16.

    dmsilev

    November 13, 2012 at 6:02 pm

    For some hilarity, take a look at this Ars Technica story doing a follow-up on the Romney FAIL-whale GOTV software. In particular, note the bit in the story about how a paranoid right wing blogger blamed the fiasco on well,

    “Why do they have Al Gore’s dev working on Romney’s social media development?!” blogger Catherine Ann Fitzpatrick asked. “Truly, how can they expect dedication?” She also singled out another developer who is African-American and “who has a 96 percent chance of being an Obama voter… I will be accused of ‘racism’ for even flagging. But it’s the truth.”

    and then proceed to the comments where said blogger appears and promptly doubles, triples, and quadruples down on the original statement.

    (General rule: if you have to proceed a statement with “this may come across as racist, but…”, the statement is probably racist.)

  17. 17.

    LanceThruster

    November 13, 2012 at 6:03 pm

    @YellowJournalism:

    I’ve always thought of Rmoney as more of a scheißkopf.

  18. 18.

    Anoniminous

    November 13, 2012 at 6:03 pm

    Looking like Petraeus’ political career is over before it started. Which is good. Aside from that, I cannot possibly communicate how much I do not care.

  19. 19.

    redshirt

    November 13, 2012 at 6:04 pm

    @Schlemizel: I think it did affect Clinton’s job performance. My theory: He was so hounded by the Repubs over these issues he felt compelled to appease them via legislation in a vain attempt to get them to back off.

  20. 20.

    Hypatia's Momma

    November 13, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    I’m torn. Should I keep reading updates on this particular scandal or should I quit all that and devote my time to the allegations against John McAfee?

    (Answer: Ignore them both. Naps with cats are better.)

  21. 21.

    TooManyJens

    November 13, 2012 at 6:05 pm

    This had better not be true: Dems short on votes for filibuster reform.

    We need to start calling our Senators now.

  22. 22.

    Another Halocene Human

    November 13, 2012 at 6:06 pm

    Fuck it, Doug, I read the article and I have some of the same questions the author did, and more. I think there a lot of things wrong here, including generals trying to mythmake themselves and bringing junior officers in with special privileges to write hagiographies. Who gives a fuck about blowjobs.

    Remember MacArthur? Remember how he and his enormous ego fucked up North Korea?

    It doesn’t surprise me that this sort of douchebaggery ran rampant under neo-con rule. It doesn’t.

    Obama ought to bring Powell into his government, somebody with common sense who is focused on the mission first and his ambitions second.

    As for adultery, obviously we’re seeing why the military has these seemingly ridiculous standards. All of the playing, the messing around, the nasty emails, the picking allies, the CRAP sounds like the trivial shit that goes on where I work. It’s childish and stupid and we don’t have one tenth of the responsibility.

    But it all starts with shitty leadership. Peter principled doofuses with important parents and social dominators should not be in charge of our biggest and most complex institutions.

  23. 23.

    danimal

    November 13, 2012 at 6:07 pm

    CTX!

  24. 24.

    Elizabelle

    November 13, 2012 at 6:08 pm

    “Elmo’s” accuser backpedalling his accusation of underage sexual relationship; now says it was adult and consensual.

    But where does Kevin Clash go to regain his good name? Hope Sesame Workshop sticks with him. Their statement does not make it clear he’s coming back.

    Great sympathy for Kevin. Enjoyed the “Becoming Elmo” documentary. He was precociously adept with puppetry; wondering now if it was an escape for him during high school.

    And what about TMZ? The accuser approached Sesame Workshop over the summer with the allegations.

    Officials at Sesame Workshop said that they thoroughly investigated the accusation, using outside investigators, over several months and believe it to be false. Mr. Clash’s leave was granted Sunday after it became clear that the Web site TMZ was planning to run an article about the accusation.
    __
    Mr. Clash said in a statement on Monday that the relationship “was between two consenting adults” — something that the accuser seemed to admit on Tuesday afternoon.

  25. 25.

    ranchandsyrup

    November 13, 2012 at 6:09 pm

    @Ann Rynd: Just playing to their base. 65 and up pearl clutchers and charlie church types.

  26. 26.

    The Moar You Know

    November 13, 2012 at 6:10 pm

    Should I care at all about any of this stuff?

    Probably not. But I’ll present this example:

    Bradley Manning almost certainly did (I will wait for the court martial) leak classified, gets a year pre-trial in solitary and will almost certainly spend the rest of his life in prison. I want to make my position on this very clear, BTW: if he did what he is accused of he more than deserves to.

    Petraeus almost certainly did (I will wait for the court martial that will NEVER happen) leak classified intel and emails to his little bit o’ recreational PR department as well as God knows who else, that material was certainly made public, and the reaction is “how dare you drum a good man out of the force! For shame, America!”

    As in the civilian world, the military also has two entirely different worlds of justice for those who have, and those who don’t.

    If you don’t give a shit about that, that’s totally understandable, most of America seems pretty OK with it.

  27. 27.

    MikeJ

    November 13, 2012 at 6:10 pm

    @danimal: It’s not on the album Lemons and Oranges, is it?

  28. 28.

    NotMax

    November 13, 2012 at 6:11 pm

    Something else?

    Okay.

    One House election result worth a historical footnote:

    Marcy Kaptur – 72%
    Samuel (Joe the Plumber) Wurzelbacher – 23%

  29. 29.

    Yutsano

    November 13, 2012 at 6:12 pm

    I kinda sorta want to bake cookies, but at the same time I’m trying to minimise food purchases before the Thanksgiving holiday. A dilemma, this is. To bake or not to bake?

  30. 30.

    dmsilev

    November 13, 2012 at 6:13 pm

    @NotMax: He scored below the Keyes Line, aka the Crazification Limit? Impressive.

  31. 31.

    dmsilev

    November 13, 2012 at 6:13 pm

    @NotMax: He scored below the Keyes Line, aka the Crazification Limit? Impressive.

  32. 32.

    penpen

    November 13, 2012 at 6:13 pm

    Greenwald seems to have the right take on what’s worth caring about about this.

  33. 33.

    Pavonis

    November 13, 2012 at 6:13 pm

    @Schlemizel: Cheating on your spouse is a morally despicable thing to do. If your heart strays, ‘fess up; don’t be a lying scumbag.

    That said, I’d take a philandering President Bill Clinton over a President Romney or a President Bush any day. Dubya was faithful to his wife yet many thousands are dead and millions impoverished from his actions.

  34. 34.

    dmsilev

    November 13, 2012 at 6:14 pm

    @Yutsano: Bake.

    (I regard pre-Thanksgiving baking as research into recipes for Thanksgiving. My coworkers are eager guinea pigs…)

  35. 35.

    Schlemizel

    November 13, 2012 at 6:14 pm

    @LanceThruster:

    And I thought Scheisse fur Gehirne

    TOE-may-toe, ta-MAH-toe

    YMMV

    8-{D

  36. 36.

    BGinCHI

    November 13, 2012 at 6:14 pm

    XTC Doug?

    Right on.

    I’ve had that song in my head since this whole thing broke Friday. Which is the only good it’s done me.

    ETA: I see danimal beat me to it. Get a job, hippy.

  37. 37.

    Jay C

    November 13, 2012 at 6:14 pm

    Well, since we’re not talking about Petraeus/MILF-gate, the part(s) I’d like to ignore are:

    1) How come, with all those FBI “investigations” going on, DNI Clapper, AG Holder, and POTUS Obama (Petraeus’s nominal bosses up the normal chain-of-command) seem to have been left utterly out of the loop, and apparently only found out about it from reading the papers on Nov. 7?

    2) How lucky (again!) is Barack Obama? The DCI embroiled, and has to resign, over a sex scandal: and the “victim” is Republican Idol (and quondam Great American War Hero) David F*ck*ng Petraeus: and not anyone who could be tarred as an “Obama crony”??

  38. 38.

    MikeJ

    November 13, 2012 at 6:15 pm

    @Yutsano:

    To bake or not to bake?

    It’s legal now.

  39. 39.

    TooManyJens

    November 13, 2012 at 6:16 pm

    @Yutsano: The answer is always “to bake.”

  40. 40.

    MCA1

    November 13, 2012 at 6:16 pm

    You should care only to the extent more high comedy like this comes from it: http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2012/11/abc-denver-channel-broadwell-all-in.php?ref=fpnewsfeed

  41. 41.

    Schlemizel

    November 13, 2012 at 6:16 pm

    @Another Halocene Human: Powell into his government, somebody with common sense who is focused on the mission first and his ambitions second.

    Not familiar with the generals career are we?

  42. 42.

    Another Halocene Human

    November 13, 2012 at 6:16 pm

    @The Moar You Know: As in the civilian world, the military also has two entirely different worlds of justice for those who have, and those who don’t.

    I’m with you, Moar. I think it’s bullshit.

    They damn well better be investigating him sharing classified info. You know the rules for that stuff?!

    It’s always stuck in my craw how the little guys are caught in this web where they can’t say boo, even if it’s true, because they’ll lose their jobs (or worse) while sitting members of Congress and VSPs can leak intel or even make shit up and claim it’s leaked intel and never suffer any consequences.

    EITHER IT’S A STATE SECRET OR IT’S NOT, MOTHERFUCKERS.

    Whatever happened to hanging these pukes for treason?

  43. 43.

    JPL

    November 13, 2012 at 6:17 pm

    @The Moar You Know: That’s how I feel. I don’t know what classified information if any Petraeus/Allen linked but if they did, no matter how small, it needs to be prosecuted. You can’t just go after privates and ignore those hire up.

  44. 44.

    Brachiator

    November 13, 2012 at 6:17 pm

    If you outlaw inappropriate emails, only outlaws will send inappropriate emails. Discuss.

    Again, the rule is there ain’t no privacy on the Internets. Even the civil libertarians haven’t grokked this one completely yet.

    @The Moar You Know:

    As in the civilian world, the military also has two entirely different worlds of justice for those who have, and those who don’t.

    So, are you saying that Bradley Manning and anyone else in the military should be free to leak whatever they want to whomever they want?

    BTW, I am amazed, amused, but not surprised at the number of tech geeks who insist that the SEALS who gave up info to the game maker did absolutely nothing wrong, and that we all have an absolute right (higher than a constitutional right) to the most righteously cool gaming experience possible. If real people in the real world get hurt, tough cookies.

  45. 45.

    BGinCHI

    November 13, 2012 at 6:18 pm

    Question for the Commentariat:

    We have a new Papa Johns in our neighborhood, which is astonishing given the amazing pizza you can buy around here.

    I want to do something to them. What should I do?

    All legal and illegal suggestions considered.

  46. 46.

    jeffreyw

    November 13, 2012 at 6:18 pm

    Mmm… ham and motherfuckers

  47. 47.

    Paul

    November 13, 2012 at 6:19 pm

    @The Moar You Know:

    I still don’t understand why Dick Cheney or Karl Rove are not in jail since they leaked classified information. Either it is a crime or it isn’t.

  48. 48.

    dmsilev

    November 13, 2012 at 6:19 pm

    @BGinCHI: Paste some fliers for let’s say Gino’s East to their windows?

  49. 49.

    NotMax

    November 13, 2012 at 6:19 pm

    @Yutsano

    Drill Bake, baby, bake.

  50. 50.

    Pavonis

    November 13, 2012 at 6:20 pm

    @Anoniminous: Ah… Petraeus, Republican dream candidate. Maybe I can finally get over my annoyance at MoveOn.org for wasting $20,000 on a full page ad in the NYT reading (IIRC), “General Petraeus… No, General Betray-Us!“. That would be clever for a 3rd grader. But I vowed never again to donate money to MoveOn.org.

  51. 51.

    Yutsano

    November 13, 2012 at 6:20 pm

    @MikeJ: Brownies are always a possibility. Maybe with a raspberry glaze. Yum.

  52. 52.

    trollhattan

    November 13, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    @NotMax:
    Here’s hoping that asshat’s fifteen minutes are well and truly ovah.

    In the Cali 7th District, the nailbiter between Bera and Lundgren continues. As of 1:00 today, Bera is ahead by 1,779 votes.

  53. 53.

    JPL

    November 13, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    @Jay C: I’m not sure the President needs to know who is all in who. He does need to be informed when it threatens national security though.

  54. 54.

    Mandalay

    November 13, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    @The Moar You Know:

    Petraeus almost certainly did…leak classified intel and emails

    A bold claim. I’m no fan of Petraeus, and I’m not saying you are wrong, but I have not read anyone else making that assertion.

    What is your evidence?

  55. 55.

    dmsilev

    November 13, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    Re: General-Sex-Gate, the Onion has perhaps the definitive story:

    “The scope of this scandal is simply astonishing—there is currently enough evidence to implicate citizens from every part of the world, even dating back before the creation of modern international states,” said one source close to the investigation, adding that the FBI has collected millions of first-person accounts of people who have either had sex themselves or witnessed others performing sexual acts. “There is even thousands of hours of video evidence that cyber-security experts in D.C. and Langley have managed to find on the Internet.”
    __
    “The real question is, ‘Who knew about this? And for how long?’” the anonymous source added.
    __
    According to reports, a comprehensive global probe jointly conducted by the FBI and CIA also revealed that, in addition to Gen. Petraeus, others alleged to have had sex in the past include Leon Panetta, Condoleezza Rice, Ben Bernanke, George Stephanopolous, John Lennon, Charlotte Brontë, Jack Nicholson, William Shakespeare, Andre Agassi, Plato, Ulysses S. Grant, Queen Elizabeth II, Ted Avery of Dayton, OH, George Washington, Karen Avery of Dayton, OH, every past and present member of the band Chicago, Sir Isaac Newton, Bill Gates, Andie MacDowell, Benjamin Franklin, Leonardo da Vinci, Vince Lombardi, and Adolf Hitler.

  56. 56.

    Anoniminous

    November 13, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    @Yutsano:

    Thinking of getting the toppings to make a Fruit Pizza when I next visit the grocery.

  57. 57.

    BGinCHI

    November 13, 2012 at 6:21 pm

    @dmsilev: OK, good start. Annoying and legal.

    Srsly, I can’t fucking believe people order that shit when there are all these other places making pizza from scratch and a thousand time tastier with less political shit flavoring.

  58. 58.

    Another Halocene Human

    November 13, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    @Schlemizel: So his biggest crime was loyalty to the CIC?

    He fell on his sword. A lot of people see it that way. Now maybe Obama’s more like Truman and prefers to surround himself with people more likely to tell him to go to hell than carry out stupid orders.

    I guess those that feel betrayed are those who believed Powell when he went on TV with that farcical stuff about Iraq having the bomb. (shrug)

  59. 59.

    Elizabelle

    November 13, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    If you want to see a fever swamp, US News&World Report has an item online; Paula Broadwell’s NC driver’s license was found recently in Rock Creek Park in DC.

    The comments are priceless. Early commenter reminds others to focus on Benghazi. But the pack is off, discussing Vince Foster.

    Someone else opines a Clinton has to be involved. (Maybe that one was snark.)

    It is a crazed bunch.

    (I personally liked that USNews assigned someone named Valerie Bonk to assist with their reporting.)

  60. 60.

    jeffreyw

    November 13, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    Laurel, The Cat Whisperer

  61. 61.

    Schlemizel

    November 13, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    @Pavonis:

    OH no doubt! Look at the presidents we KNOW had side action – FDR, IKE, JFK, Big Dog and those that at least pretend they did not – NIXON, St. Ronald, Big Daddy & Bumbbellyou Bush – I’ll take the philanderers every time.

    Only this damn Obama guys, who actually appears to be a genuinely decent guy for some damn reason, breaks the rule

  62. 62.

    Chris

    November 13, 2012 at 6:22 pm

    @Another Halocene Human:

    Fuck it, Doug, I read the article and I have some of the same questions the author did, and more. I think there a lot of things wrong here, including generals trying to mythmake themselves and bringing junior officers in with special privileges to write hagiographies. Who gives a fuck about blowjobs.

    I don’t think the public’s gotten a lot more susceptible to that since the end of the draft. Less people who’ve served in war = more people who’re impressed by the uniform and haven’t figured out that generals are still human beings who eat, sleep and shit like the rest of us.

    One of my favorite Truman quotes, about firing MacArthur: “I fired him because he wouldn’t respect the authority of the president. That’s the answer to that. I didn’t fire him because he was a dumb son of a bitch, although he was, but that’s not against the law for generals. If it was, half to three-quarters of them would be in jail.” Of course, Truman served in World War One, probably met quite a few dumbass officers in his day, and knew better than to be impressed by the stars on MacArthur’s uniform. How many politicians these days can say the same?

  63. 63.

    Another Halocene Human

    November 13, 2012 at 6:23 pm

    @dmsilev: Isaac Newton libel!

  64. 64.

    Grumpy Code Monkey

    November 13, 2012 at 6:23 pm

    @dmsilev:

    That thread has been fun. I don’t normally like to pick on the obviously batshit, but she makes it impossible not to.

    She’s not convinced Romney would have won, but she is convinced Orca’s the reason he lost. She’s not racist, she just knows that 96% of all black people will automatically vote for Obama and should not be allowed to write software for anyone else.

  65. 65.

    BGinCHI

    November 13, 2012 at 6:23 pm

    @Elizabelle: I think Valerie Bonk got her position there from Ivana Tinkle.

  66. 66.

    dmsilev

    November 13, 2012 at 6:24 pm

    @BGinCHI: Yeah, I know what you mean. A Papa Johns opened up in my neck of the woods fairly recently (maybe 6 months ago), and they seem to be doing OK despite the presence of four or five actually good pizza places within about a 5 block radius.

    I’ll just blame all the undergrads.

  67. 67.

    GxB

    November 13, 2012 at 6:25 pm

    @dmsilev: Add in the libertarian (3%) and a little rounding and you’re right on the mark.

  68. 68.

    sacrablue

    November 13, 2012 at 6:25 pm

    Good congressional election news: in the CA-7 race, Ami Bera now leads the odious Dan Lungren by 3824 votes. Now concede, asshole!

  69. 69.

    Another Halocene Human

    November 13, 2012 at 6:25 pm

    @Schlemizel: OH no doubt! Look at the presidents we KNOW had side action – FDR, IKE, JFK, Big Dog and those that at least pretend they did not – NIXON, St. Ronald, Big Daddy & Bumbbellyou Bush – I’ll take the philanderers every time.

    If by “big daddy” you mean George Herbert Walker Bush, he was definitely cheating on his wife.

  70. 70.

    TooManyJens

    November 13, 2012 at 6:26 pm

    @Grumpy Code Monkey: Statistically, she’s not wrong that he’s very likely to have voted for Obama. But from what I gather of Silicon Valley, so are most white programmers. But of course this is the one who can’t be trusted…

  71. 71.

    Elizabelle

    November 13, 2012 at 6:26 pm

    @jeffreyw:

    Wow, that looks delicious.

    Perfect for chilly weather.

  72. 72.

    dmsilev

    November 13, 2012 at 6:27 pm

    @Grumpy Code Monkey: She’s more bat-shit insane than Erick of the House of Erick. Which is impressive when you think about it.

    (watching her get treated with the same level of respect that our pet ‘UNLIMITED CORPORATE CASH’ moron gets here was kind of fun as well)

  73. 73.

    Chris

    November 13, 2012 at 6:27 pm

    @Pavonis:

    You can vote for people and still think they’re assholes.

    I’m happy for the work Washington and Jefferson did during the revolution and a lot of what they did afterwards to set up the nation. I still think they should burn in hell, or at minimum, several thousand years in purgatory, for practicing slavery.

  74. 74.

    Keith

    November 13, 2012 at 6:27 pm

    I thinkhope that once the “holy crap, it’s Petraeus!” wears thin, people will start to realize “holy crap, *I’ve* written emails like that. The FBI can read that stuff?!??”.

  75. 75.

    Raven

    November 13, 2012 at 6:27 pm

    A “Southern” lawyer just came to my house to close on a re-fi. First he let it slip that he would have been on the Northern side in the Civil War. Then he said he saw that I was a Nam vet and confessed all the ways he went about avoiding it. I liked him both times!

  76. 76.

    ranchandsyrup

    November 13, 2012 at 6:27 pm

    Impeach-a-thon 2012-201?

  77. 77.

    J.W. Hamner

    November 13, 2012 at 6:28 pm

    I think my position would be best described as militant apathy.

  78. 78.

    notoriousJRT

    November 13, 2012 at 6:29 pm

    I suppose I continue to take interest in this story / gossip because I am waiting to see if this is a case of “long knives” dispatching Petaeus & swiping at Allen and manipulating gossip to take them down or a case of gossip about obsessives acting obsessively with al little help from institutional animus and ass- hattery (CIA, FBI, and military), or a useless slurry of all of the above. Is the author of this mess going public a political axe-grinder or just a person whose obsession sent her / him down a nutty, destructive path?

  79. 79.

    notoriousJRT

    November 13, 2012 at 6:31 pm

    @Keith:
    Another angle of interest!

  80. 80.

    Another Halocene Human

    November 13, 2012 at 6:31 pm

    @BGinCHI: Calling them up nightly asking for a pizza with — the works! Don’t forget the anchovies! And when they tell you in a drone they don’t carry anchovies, cry about how mamale always takes her pizza with anchovies, just like in the Old Country (NYC) and you don’t want to disappoint her, she’s 87 years old…

    Try to drag it out so the manager has to come on.

    Not that this would truly avenge the owner’s douchebaggery. But at least it would make a point about their fake-ass food.

    They’re not even real pizzas. The crust comes half-cooked and then they run it through a toaster oven thing. Half of the time it works and half of the time it comes out really, really bad.

  81. 81.

    Gex

    November 13, 2012 at 6:32 pm

    @dmsilev: The idea that she’s a racist because she thinks the black man will sabotage the software totally eludes her apparently. She just knows it is soooooo unfair to say he’s probably an Obama supporter.

  82. 82.

    Elizabelle

    November 13, 2012 at 6:32 pm

    @Another Halocene Human:

    RE GHWBush:

    The Washington Post ran a little article along these lines in their federal govt column:

    “Jennifer Fitzgerald, who has served in a variety of positions under George HW Bush, was appointed to …”

    Choked on my coffee. Amazed they went there.

  83. 83.

    Schlemizel

    November 13, 2012 at 6:32 pm

    @Another Halocene Human:

    Does the name My Lai ring any bells? This guy has been covering up, kissing up and fucking up since the 60s. His bullshit performance before the UN that he KNEW was a lie and KNEW would lead to countless unnecessary deaths was not that big a stretch for him

  84. 84.

    Snarki, child of Loki

    November 13, 2012 at 6:34 pm

    I think the lyrics of “The Modern Major-General’s Song” is going to need updating….it’ll be a lot spicier than Gilbert and Sullivan ever imagined.

    Plus drone strikes. Yeah.

  85. 85.

    Pavonis

    November 13, 2012 at 6:35 pm

    @Keith: Everything you do online can potentially by found out by authorities if you’re not a skilled hacker. My dad once worked for a search engine company and told me about the creepy things people searched for. “They” can easily find out about your secret schoolgirl fetish. Or anything else for that matter.

  86. 86.

    jeffreyw

    November 13, 2012 at 6:35 pm

    @Elizabelle: Thanks! It’s actually the first time I’ve cooked kale. That habanero vinegar was good on it.

  87. 87.

    El Cid

    November 13, 2012 at 6:35 pm

    The right is going to have to work a lot harder to make this seem like an evil, puppet-master conspiracy to cover-up “Benghazi” when it seems a lot more like an episode of Three’s Company, except (so far) without the mistaken identity plot.

  88. 88.

    trollhattan

    November 13, 2012 at 6:36 pm

    @sacrablue:
    I like your #s better. Mine above are from the CA SOS office, but looks like the county #s are more recent. He’s basically doubled his lead after an additional 40k votes have been counted.

    Smells like victory.

  89. 89.

    Schlemizel

    November 13, 2012 at 6:36 pm

    @Another Halocene Human:

    While I agree with you there has never been any evidence that Big Daddy cheated on his mother. I’ll also bet you a dime that St. Ronald was not true to the ice queen (who according to sources in the car spent an LA to Palm Springs drive blowing Sinatra and Peter Laughton alternately). But when viewed from the conventional wisdom world bother are believed to be good boys.

  90. 90.

    Linda Featheringill

    November 13, 2012 at 6:36 pm

    @dmsilev:

    :-)

    Sir Isaac Newton, though, maybe not so much. Not sure.

  91. 91.

    BGinCHI

    November 13, 2012 at 6:37 pm

    @Another Halocene Human: I like your plan.

    I get to use my Father Guido Sarducci voice when I call.

  92. 92.

    sacrablue

    November 13, 2012 at 6:37 pm

    @trollhattan: Yep, looks like we will have our victory party on Sunday.

  93. 93.

    James E. Powell

    November 13, 2012 at 6:39 pm

    @LanceThruster:

    Romney always struck me more as General Peckem.

  94. 94.

    Another Halocene Human

    November 13, 2012 at 6:39 pm

    @Paul: I still don’t understand why Dick Cheney or Karl Rove are not in jail since they leaked classified information. Either it is a crime or it isn’t.

    Pinned the blame on Scooter and then pardoned him. But the point remains.

    Glenn Greenwald wrote a pretty decent book (more of an essay, blown up into hardback form, for the $$$ulz) on the subject. No respect for him otherwise but I’m glad I’m not the only person who thought it was shit.

  95. 95.

    gelfling545

    November 13, 2012 at 6:39 pm

    So, if anybody I know gets “threatening” email from the girlfriend of a friend or acquaintance I should advise them to call the FBI instead of calling the friend & asking what the hell is the matter with their light o’ love? I just don’t get this part. Women who are being threatened with gbh by stalkers are told to mostly file a report &get over it unless you’ve got injuries which may or may not make a difference but this case is FBI material?

    I keep waiting for the “real” issue to come out but so far there’s only more crazy. Maybe that is the issue. They’re all crazy. The FBI agent got into the email loop, too? Good grief.

  96. 96.

    Another Halocene Human

    November 13, 2012 at 6:40 pm

    @gelfling545: It’s all “connections” instead of protocol.

    Shameful, babyish, pathetic.

  97. 97.

    MikeJ

    November 13, 2012 at 6:41 pm

    @Another Halocene Human: How do you sell pizza and not have anchovies? Is that even legal?

  98. 98.

    jeffreyw

    November 13, 2012 at 6:41 pm

    Thread needs moar puppeh!

  99. 99.

    Elizabelle

    November 13, 2012 at 6:41 pm

    Salon has the Post’s wording (from an article about Kitty Kelley book on the Bushes):

    two long affairs — one with Jennifer Fitzgerald, Bush’s White House deputy chief of protocol, who, as the Washington Post once slyly put it, “has served President-elect George Bush in a variety of positions,”

  100. 100.

    JPL

    November 13, 2012 at 6:41 pm

    @gelfling545: You might also mention that the FBI now has access to their email. Seems as though Jill Kelley didn’t understand that part.

  101. 101.

    Higgs Boson's Mate

    November 13, 2012 at 6:42 pm

    Hmmm, wonder how it came to pass that the Director of the CIA was so inept about security and planning that he managed to have an affair that is now providing the media with a feeding frenzy. Lots of people have extramarital affairs and highly the placed are among them. They aren’t getting caught – except when they’re stupid or careless. Those last two don’t seem to be virtues for any spot in the CIA.

  102. 102.

    Elizabelle

    November 13, 2012 at 6:43 pm

    @jeffreyw:

    Was wondering about the condiment. Thought at first it might be tomato preserves.

  103. 103.

    NotMax

    November 13, 2012 at 6:44 pm

    @Another Halocene Human

    Libby was never granted a pardon.

    His jail time was commuted by Bush, but the convictions and all other parts of sentencing left intact.

    Libby is still a convicted felon, and his fine and probation terms remain unaffected.

  104. 104.

    SatanicPanic

    November 13, 2012 at 6:45 pm

    @sacrablue: Oh it will be good to get rid of that guy. My district appears to be on track to give Brian Bilbray the boot.

  105. 105.

    muddy

    November 13, 2012 at 6:46 pm

    Here’s a weird thing, https://www.cia.gov/kids-page/games/coloring-book/index.html

    I wonder who thought up this outreach? What is the point, and what search strings would come up with that page? So odd.

  106. 106.

    Another Halocene Human

    November 13, 2012 at 6:46 pm

    @Schlemizel: Whoa, are we talking about the same person?

    Jennifer Fitzgerald

    Pretty sure the press knew all about Fitzgerald (hm, I wonder if “Fitz” in the show SCANDAL is named after her) but back then didn’t say and it came out during the Clinton scandal as an example of their prior discretion PLUS it was said that Linda Tripp was very jealous of Fitzgerald and bitter that nobody cared that she was having an affair with Bush. Supposedly this motivated her actions towards Monica Lewinsky later.

  107. 107.

    BGinCHI

    November 13, 2012 at 6:47 pm

    @NotMax: So you’re saying he’s odds-on favorite to be the next Governor of Florida.

  108. 108.

    Another Halocene Human

    November 13, 2012 at 6:48 pm

    @muddy: I wonder who thought up this outreach? What is the point, and what search strings would come up with that page? So odd.

    Diversion for children of officers so they’ll quit asking what mommy/daddy does all day?

    ETA: so I just looked at the images and wow, that is odd.

  109. 109.

    The Moar You Know

    November 13, 2012 at 6:49 pm

    So, are you saying that Bradley Manning and anyone else in the military should be free to leak whatever they want to whomever they want?

    @Brachiator: Reading comprehension not someone’s strong suit this afternoon. Or perhaps my snark meter’s broken. Whatever. Plain English:

    I think Manning ought to be executed if found guilty. I think, if found guilty, the same should go for Petraeus.

    The problem being is that Petraeus will never see the inside of a courtroom. Like our favorite troll around here likes to say, bank on it.

  110. 110.

    NotMax

    November 13, 2012 at 6:50 pm

    @BG in Chi

    Bullseye. :·)

  111. 111.

    YellowJournalism

    November 13, 2012 at 6:51 pm

    Uh, yeah, I would say so:

    @Chris_Moody: This White House petition program is getting hilariously out of control. http://t.co/aEM2OoVr

    Texas to secede has over 88,000. I wonder how many of those sigs were from people outside of Texas. We better get to keep Austin somehow.

  112. 112.

    RareSanity

    November 13, 2012 at 6:52 pm

    I haven’t been following the Petraeus thing close enough, still suffering news burn-out from the election.

    So feel free to talk about something else.

    I’m please to report, that I am one of the few, the proud, the successful purchasers of a Nexus 4!

    I think Google had a stock of like 20 or 30 of them per country. /sarcasm

  113. 113.

    JPL

    November 13, 2012 at 6:53 pm

    Jill Kelley wants diplomatic protection… link

    It is unfortunate that the telephone number was released..
    her diplomatic protection should help her change it.

  114. 114.

    muddy

    November 13, 2012 at 6:53 pm

    @Another Halocene Human: I colored one of the cartoons with the spy and the car in glorious technicolor, and wondered if it let them peek at my computer. Like they give a shit.

  115. 115.

    sacrablue

    November 13, 2012 at 6:57 pm

    @SatanicPanic: Good. Lobbyist jobs for both of them. Just knowing that he is not leaving of his own choosing gives me sufficient pleasure.

  116. 116.

    Schlemizel

    November 13, 2012 at 6:58 pm

    @Another Halocene Human:

    So you and Linda remember that (and me) but nobody else. I’ll stick with my list of those known for hound dogin it and those that people can at least pretend about

  117. 117.

    NotMax

    November 13, 2012 at 6:58 pm

    Wishing them much success in a tough, uphill battle.

    New Group Unveils Its Plan to Get Money Out of Politics

    … Represent.Us says its goal is to pass the American Anti-Corruption Act, a nine-point plan to crack down on lobbyists, strengthen the flimsy law intended to prevent super-PACs from coordinating with campaigns, and put a stop to undisclosed donations funneled through dark-money nonprofits.…
    __
    Represent.Us boasts a high-profile, bipartisan board of advisors, among them former Federal Elections Commission chair (and Stephen Colbert’s “personal lawyer”) Trevor Potter, Lawrence Lessig, disgraced lobbyist-turned-reformer Jack Abramoff, representatives from Occupy Wall Street and the DC Tea Party Patriots, and even Teddy Roosevelt’s great-grandson, Theodore IV. The group hopes to to convince 1 million American citizens to join its cause, building on popular revulsion to what it deems “the worst political corruption in American history.”

  118. 118.

    ranchandsyrup

    November 13, 2012 at 6:58 pm

    Made me LOL:

    Derrick Belcher, a 45 year-old topless carwash owner, is behind the Alabama petition to secede from the Union to resist Democratic party values.

  119. 119.

    Ted & Hellen

    November 13, 2012 at 6:59 pm

    @Another Halocene Human:

    Obama ought to bring Powell into his government, somebody with common sense who is focused on the mission first and his ambitions second.

    Are you talking about General Colon Powell? Who had the common sense to present a big stinking pile of bullshit to the U.N. and the world as the Bush Child’s excuse to invade Iraq? The Colon Powell who in a remotely just world would be behind bars with Cheney?

    Cause I’m sure you aren’t referring to HIM.

  120. 120.

    Litlebritdifrnt

    November 13, 2012 at 7:01 pm

    If you are a fan of The Princess Bride you are going to love this

    http://www.buzzfeed.com/jpmoore/an-espn-nfl-show-cant-stop-talking-about-the-pri

  121. 121.

    Jay in Oregon

    November 13, 2012 at 7:02 pm

    As far as Petraeus’s and Broadwell’s marriages go, that is between them and their respective spouses to figure out and forgive. It’s none of my business.

    I think the whole Petraeus/Broadwell relationship seems tacky and ill-considered to begin with. He was on her dissertation committee and the subject of her dissertation? How the hell does that pass muster? And there’s the whole biographer/reporter/sidekick thing as well. Even though they are both responsible for their actions, it seems like they’ve been on a course for something like this to develop at some point.

    All of the other stuff like the Shirtless FBI Guy seems like additional freakshow for ratings.

  122. 122.

    ThatLeftTurnInABQ

    November 13, 2012 at 7:04 pm

    @dmsilev:

    According to reports, a comprehensive global probe jointly conducted by the FBI and CIA also revealed that, in addition to Gen. Petraeus, others alleged to have had sex in the past include Leon Panetta, Condoleezza Rice, Ben Bernanke, George Stephanopolous, John Lennon, Charlotte Brontë, Jack Nicholson, William Shakespeare, Andre Agassi, Plato, Ulysses S. Grant, Queen Elizabeth II, Ted Avery of Dayton, OH, George Washington, Karen Avery of Dayton, OH, every past and present member of the band Chicago, Sir Isaac Newton, Bill Gates, Andie MacDowell, Benjamin Franklin, Leonardo da Vinci, Vince Lombardi, and Adolf Hitler.

    But not George Tierney of Greenville South Carolina

  123. 123.

    WereBear

    November 13, 2012 at 7:05 pm

    @Jay in Oregon: It does shed new light on why they are so freaked about “morals.” They should get some!

  124. 124.

    NotMax

    November 13, 2012 at 7:05 pm

    @ranchandsyrup

    The mental image conjured is – disturbing.

    Presumably a competent editor would have amended that to read “owner of a ‘topless carwash'”

  125. 125.

    AA+ Bonds

    November 13, 2012 at 7:08 pm

    .
    .
    I think it is way cool to watch all these pig dipshits get sent to the yard for absolutely anything at all

    They are murderous bullet-head scum and their various lickspittles and if the worst thing that happens to them is public shame for their sex lives, cry me a fucking river

    Don’t worry, though, O’Hanlon and the rest of the anus-licking access-hungry crew have already settled on McMaster as their new god even as they swear up and down that Allen is Christ crucified

  126. 126.

    Elizabelle

    November 13, 2012 at 7:10 pm

    @Ted & Hellen:

    I would support Colin Powell returning to a US administration.

    Yes, he testified on implausible evidence on behalf of a trumped up war . Cannot get past that.

    But I believe in redemption and second chances.

    Powell “self deported”, as it were, for many years.

    He has talents to provide, and wisdom.

    (FWIW, Al Sharpton got a second chance. As did many.)

    Maybe Powell can be the antidote to the military-industrial complex Dwight Eisenhower warned against.

    He’s been burned and used by it.

    Maybe he emerges, wiser.

  127. 127.

    ThatLeftTurnInABQ

    November 13, 2012 at 7:10 pm

    @NotMax:

    His jail time was commuted by Bush, but the convictions and all other parts of sentencing left intact.
    __
    Libby is still a convicted felon, and his fine and probation terms remain unaffected.

    I remember at the time having the impression that W did that deliberately just to piss off Cheney and remind him who was the Decider after all.

  128. 128.

    max

    November 13, 2012 at 7:13 pm

    Should I care at all about any of this stuff? Because I don’t.

    Because of the HIGH QUALITY entertainment value. (That is, this isn’t shocking, this is FUCKING HILARIOUS. Especially the part where the R’s fragged their own guy. Great stuff.)

    max
    [‘And the fake cancer charity angle: love it!’]

  129. 129.

    trollhattan

    November 13, 2012 at 7:15 pm

    @ThatLeftTurnInABQ:
    That’s how I took it as well. One of Dubya’s weaknesses turned into a strength, however fleetingly. That he’s shut his yap for Obama’s presidency is also welcomed, if only Cheney and Walnuts…awww, who am I kidding?

  130. 130.

    Ted & Hellen

    November 13, 2012 at 7:15 pm

    @The Moar You Know:

    I think Manning ought to be executed if found guilty.

    My god.

    Fuck you.

  131. 131.

    ranchandsyrup

    November 13, 2012 at 7:17 pm

    @NotMax: At first I cringed, then I remembered the Onion Joe Biden story of Uncle Joe washing his car in the driveway shirtless. Alllll better.

    http://www.theonion.com/articles/shirtless-biden-washes-trans-am-in-white-house-dri,2718/

  132. 132.

    trollhattan

    November 13, 2012 at 7:19 pm

    @ranchandsyrup:
    Carwash scenes always conjure “Cool Hand Luke.”

    What we have he-yah…”

  133. 133.

    Violet

    November 13, 2012 at 7:20 pm

    @Litlebritdifrnt: That’s funny.

  134. 134.

    El Cid

    November 13, 2012 at 7:21 pm

    @Elizabelle: No thanks. His roles in helping cover up My Lai and then pathetic, blatant lying (or absolutely willful refusal of personal integrity) in front of the entire United Nations in order to justify a war desired by his superiors makes me think that there really is cause to look to the many, many other qualified people than to keep rewarding people for this sort of truly horrific nastiness in the pursuit of career.

  135. 135.

    ranchandsyrup

    November 13, 2012 at 7:21 pm

    @trollhattan: HA! That’s a good’un.

  136. 136.

    srv

    November 13, 2012 at 7:22 pm

    Doug, why you should care is because a Teahadi FBI agent who thought he was going to expose an Obama conspiracy instead wiped out any chances for Patraeus 2016

  137. 137.

    Ted & Hellen

    November 13, 2012 at 7:23 pm

    @Elizabelle:

    Yes, he testified on implausible evidence on behalf of a trumped up war . Cannot get past that.

    And is thus responsible for hundreds of thousands of dead people and thousands more maimed, plus trillions of wasted dollars. Oh, but never mind…

    He can get his second chance after serving his life sentence in jail.

    The military fetish contingent is always strong on BJ.

  138. 138.

    aimai

    November 13, 2012 at 7:23 pm

    @Another Halocene Human:

    In what sense did he have a choice in “throwing himself on his sword?” He runs a spy agency which frowns on anything that can lead to its members (sic) being suborned or blackmailed. “He’s in a stable marriage” was probably one of the selling points for making him head of the CIA–have they ever given it (knowingly) to a single guy or a gay guy (that being the FBI’s turf, of course, given Hoover).

    He had to offer his resignation. This had nothing to do with loyalty to the CIC or to honor or anything else. He did it because he got caught, like any other penny ante media hound.

    aimai

  139. 139.

    Calouste

    November 13, 2012 at 7:28 pm

    @trollhattan:

    They could ask Prime Minister convicted felon Silvio Berlusconi about how the Italians reacted to his sex parties.

  140. 140.

    NotMax

    November 13, 2012 at 7:30 pm

    @ranchandsyrup

    Cannot be alone in seeing a large uptick of sloppy writing at TPM, a trend that hasn’t abated.

    It’s bothersome.

  141. 141.

    Violet

    November 13, 2012 at 7:32 pm

    @srv:

    Doug, why you should care is because a Teahadi FBI agent who thought he was going to expose an Obama conspiracy instead wiped out any chances for Patraeus 2016

    So what you’re saying is, it was really a clandestine operation by the Democrats? Didn’t think they had it in ’em. Must have been an Obama operation. Axelrod and Plouffe in their spare time.

  142. 142.

    catclub

    November 13, 2012 at 7:34 pm

    @ThatLeftTurnInABQ: Sir Isaac Newton

    Really? I thought he was very strange, to the point of extremely strange.

  143. 143.

    ranchandsyrup

    November 13, 2012 at 7:36 pm

    @NotMax: True enough NotMax. I visit TPM way less than I used to. Usually directed there from another site.

  144. 144.

    bjacques

    November 13, 2012 at 7:41 pm

    Generals and majors should listen more often to their sergeants.

  145. 145.

    YellowJournalism

    November 13, 2012 at 7:44 pm

    @ThatLeftTurnInABQ: George Tierney of Greenville South Carolina? Are you sure you meant George Tierney of Greenville South Carolina?

    Why, of course you meant George Tierney of Greenville South Carolina! Yes, just because you are a dick doesn’t mean you actually know how to use one.

  146. 146.

    mk3872

    November 13, 2012 at 7:53 pm

    @BGinCHI: For an XTC reference, it would have to be “Generals and Majors”, not Majors & Generals … Generals and Majors always seem so unhappy unless they got a war …

  147. 147.

    Mnemosyne

    November 13, 2012 at 8:26 pm

    @Another Halocene Human:

    NotMax beat me to it, but Libby’s sentence was commuted, not pardoned. Apparently it was a bit of a “fuck you” to Cheney, whose boy Libby was.

    Depending on what state he currently lives in, Libby may not have been able to vote in the recent election since he remains a convicted felon.

  148. 148.

    Mnemosyne

    November 13, 2012 at 8:30 pm

    @Jay in Oregon:

    Petraeus’s marital problems are not our business, but the fact that the head of the CIA put himself into a position where he could easily be blackmailed is the whole country’s business.

  149. 149.

    redshirt

    November 13, 2012 at 8:37 pm

    @YellowJournalism: He apologized in what seemed a sincere manner, changed all his twitter stuff to non-offensive stuff, then went offline. To give George Tierny of Greenville South Carolina some credit.

  150. 150.

    mainmati

    November 13, 2012 at 9:43 pm

    @schrodinger’s cat: And as I said in last night’s thread, why wasn’t this a webinar? Webinars cost next to nothing and can reach anyone with an Internet connection. (Sigh)

  151. 151.

    Another Halocene Human

    November 13, 2012 at 11:34 pm

    @aimai: Powell, not Petraeus. Maybe I’m just ignorant where Powell is concerned. This blog seems to have more detractors than supporters. Never cared for Petraeus, although that’s not really based on anything. This whole debacle doesn’t reflect well on him, however.

  152. 152.

    John

    November 13, 2012 at 11:41 pm

    @danimal: 4-10!!

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