Butt Chugging

As if fraternity hazing rituals weren’t homoerotic enough:

As medical personnel treated a University of Tennessee student for severe alcohol poisoning from a bizarre consumption method, UT police walked into a drunken scene at a campus fraternity, records show.

Officers early Saturday found several young men at the Pi Kappa Alpha house, 1820 Fraternity Park Drive, passed out in their rooms “and bags from wine boxes, some empty and some partially empty, strewn across the halls and rooms.”

Authorities think Alexander P. Broughton, 20, of Memphis, who had a blood-alcohol level thought to be “well over” 0.40 percent, ingested the alcohol by a method known as “butt chugging,” in which wine was inserted directly by a tube into his rectum for quick and potent absorption.

I’m surprised none of these shitheads used champagne and blew themselves up.

126 replies
  1. 1
    Linda Featheringill says:

    Calling Professor Darwin. Calling Professor Darwin.

    Please, please don’t let these young men reproduce. Please.

  2. 2
    dlwchico says:

    I drank a lot when I was that age, but damn, this is weird. Beer bongs don’t get you drunk fast enough these days?

  3. 3
    WereBear says:

    Young people these days. They don’t know how to drink.

    I’m serious. This macho “the first one to brain damage wins” method of mass consumption is completely pointless. All the dangers with none of the fun.

    But we haven’t been honest with the youth since… ever. Might want to give it a whirl sometime.

  4. 4
    TheMightyTrowel says:

    This is a time honoured tradition in the americas for consuming alcohol that is too toxic to drink (ie, you would puke it up too fast to get drunk). Maybe they were just getting in touch with their Inka or Mayan roots.

  5. 5
    geg6 says:

    Holeeeeee fuuuuuuuck! I’ll bet anything that they’re all College Republicans. Sick fucks, damn.

    Makes me glad I’m old.

  6. 6
    shpx.ohfu says:

    It’s always about the ass with these guys. “Thank you sir! May I have another?”

  7. 7
    S. cerevisiae says:

    Drinking – ur doing it WRONG!

  8. 8
    Chinn Romney says:

    I understand butt chugging is legal in Tennessee, so what’s the problem?

  9. 9
    MikeJ says:

    This is what happens when you let Glenn Reynolds on campus.

  10. 10
    R-Jud says:

    Wow, they’re actually reading the Darwin Awards for inspiration now.

    At least the champion at the link had an excuse for not being able to drink with his mouth – some sort of throat issue.

  11. 11
  12. 12
    Cassidy says:

    Now I know what my weekends have been missing.

  13. 13
    EconWatcher says:

    Why can’t these crazy kids just smoke some weed and experiment with psychedelics, like I did in college?

  14. 14
    RedKitten says:

    That is seriously fucked up. Goodness knows I ingested more than my fair share of booze in university, but if anybody had suggested booze enemas, they would have been considered a complete and total freak.

  15. 15
    EconWatcher says:

    Why can’t these crazy kids just smoke some weed and experiment with psychedelics, like I did in college?

  16. 16
    Baud says:

    I blame Obama.

  17. 17
    R-Jud says:


    if anybody had suggested booze enemas, they would have been considered a complete and total freak.

    And an asshole?

  18. 18

    And right wingnuts believe natural selection is a myth. Go figure.

  19. 19
    Snarki, child of Loki says:

    “Henceforth, let the PKA fraternity at UT be known as the ‘butt-chuggers'”

  20. 20
    Ash Can says:

    Are we sure these were frat members and not Romney campaign staffers? It would explain a lot…

  21. 21
    Revanch says:

    LOL I’ve been waiting for this day to come! My girlfriend and I continuously joke about the scourge of underage buttchugging (as well as vodka-infused tampons) amongst our nations youngsters. So now comes the transition from made-up moral panic to real life idiot frat antics. Life imitating art, or just fucking hilariously disgusting self-degradation? You decide.

    Wasn’t Cole a frat bro? He probably knows all about this, though single malt scotch up the ole pooper probably smarts somethin fierce compared to a plastic bladder of cheap merlot. I wonder if they channeled Bear Grills or whatever his name is when taking the firewater enema. At any rate I’m thrilled to learn of these pioneering masochists and forever grateful for their rectums’ sacrifice. Bottoms up!

    P.s. and off-top, but this is an equally brutal cringe-barrassment:


  22. 22
    Hal says:

    ingested the alcohol by a method known as “butt chugging,”

    I wonder how long the writer laughed after typing this sentence, and where the fact checker looked to verify the details? Urban Dictionary?

  23. 23
  24. 24
    RSA says:

    Extreme wine tasting.

    It sounded like a good idea at the time…

  25. 25
    NotMax says:

    For teetotalers, is it cola and Pop Rocks?

    The mind (not to mention the lower intestine) boggles.

  26. 26
    Gex says:

    Whenever anyone receives pleasure putting something in a passageway that is clearly outbound only, we solve this with constitutional amendments. Time to start getting signatures.

  27. 27
    sparrow says:

    This is the kind of thing that SHOULD make us ask what is so deeply wrong in the American psyche that we not only have record numbers of kids numbing it all out with alcohol, but taking it to such lengths as nearly killing themselves in painful ways. Really, can we get off the “just fun and games gone to far” and admit that normal (meaning: well adjusted and happy) people should not do these things?

  28. 28
    Tone in DC says:


  29. 29
    Snarki, child of Loki says:

    Well, if the butt-chuggers used vodka, it would make fart-lighting far more memorable. For the survivors, that is.

  30. 30
  31. 31

    You know, Animal House is a great movie, but there’s one thing I’ll never forgive it for. Fraternities were on the dge of dying out in America by the late 70’s; then Animal House came along and glamorized it for the bunch of young guys who were heading off to college about then, and stove off the timely death of fraternities. When I first went to college in the late 80’s, the frats threw a bunch of parties to rope in freshmen, as they always do. I went to some of them early on, and for about 8 minutes, I even thought about joining one. In the end, that kind of life just wasn’t for me.

  32. 32
    Raven says:

    @sparrow: Oh give it a rest. Young and old people are going to get fucked up. How often does this site turn into a giddy little booze fest?

  33. 33
    Laura says:

    Seriously though, why ARE the “machoest” of men (frat guys, athletes, military) also the ones who participate in the most homoerotic behavior?

  34. 34
    Handy says:

    I knew a few people who did an espresso enema to get jacked up on caffeine. I was never interested in trying it – I like to drink my coffee.

  35. 35
    presquevu says:

    Santorum cocktail, anyone?

  36. 36
    nemesis says:

    This is an effective and simple way to ingest drugs-through the anus.
    Coke and prescriptions drugs that are crushed up finely are known to be used this way. I have it on good authority that it works. Not really sure if the high is that much better than other means of ingestion. But alcohol? No data on that at all.

  37. 37
    TheMightyTrowel says:

    @Laura: moSt aspects of macho culture are actually men performing maleness for other men. the default in this scenario is that women become passive objects to consume like beer and the meaningful relationships are only forged between males. hence extreme bonding which can read Br homoerotic in a society where men do not touch each other publicly either physically or emotionally

  38. 38
    flukebucket says:


    It is nothing but a bunch of Volunteers preparing for the ass kicking they are going to get in Athens on Saturday.

  39. 39
    rlrr says:

    Future Republicans…

  40. 40
    Mark S. says:

    Ugh, can we talk about anything besides wine enemas?

    Like this. Now we need to wait for the polls to be unskewed, but this is awesome:

    FLORIDA: Obama 53 – Romney 44
    OHIO: Obama 53 – Romney 43
    PENNSYLVANIA: Obama 54 – Romney 42

    It ain’t over, but the fat lady’s on in five.

  41. 41
    Cassidy says:

    @Laura: It’s not really as prevalent as you think. It’s depicted in fictional shows because it’s easy, cheap, and witty one liners are able to be created.

  42. 42
    jibeaux says:

    I have heard of vodka-soaked tampons before, and have tried to suppress it ever since. I dunno, I was young and stupid once too, but honestly it didn’t take all that long in college for me to figure out “oh, social underage drinking is enjoyable. Binge underage drinking is idiotic and destructive.” These are people who apparently went through their binge drinking phase and thought “MOAR!”

  43. 43
    jrg says:


    But we haven’t been honest with the youth since… ever.

    Right? One minute you’re telling your kids that Elvis is devil music and weed will shrink his testicles… The next minute, he’s passed out with a box of wine shoved up his ass.

  44. 44
    sparrow says:

    @Raven: I’m not anti-alcohol, but you don’t think it’s a problem when kids all over the country regularly get black-out drunk? I like to drink, I even like on rare occasions to get drunk, and I used to binge drink. I’m really sorry now that I wasted my 20s that way. I have almost no real friendships from that period — it was just a group of people pushing the world away. Shallow people & shallow conversations. There IS an undeniable trend going on in the teenage & college populations in terms of drinking… personally, I would like to know why.

  45. 45
    Forked Tongue says:

    Hmmm…well, now I have an idea for what to do on election night if everything goes horribly wrong.

  46. 46
    rlrr says:

    @Mark S.:

    “Looks tied to me.”
    — Political Slobserver

  47. 47
    ant says:

    um, wouldn’t this method give one the shits?

    My digestive tract gets pretty fucked up from drinking the normal way. After a hard night of drinking, it can take up to two days for the flora of my intestines to return to normal.

    Um, yeah, butt chugging is retarded.

  48. 48
    MikeJ says:


    There IS an undeniable trend

    I deny it. It’s nothing new.

  49. 49
    Balconesfault says:

    Can’t just go to IV drip bags filled with Everclear?


  50. 50
    Laura says:

    @Cassidy: I don’t think it’s prevalent necessarily, but certainly not uncommon from what I’ve heard and witnessed in real life.

  51. 51
    Cassidy says:

    @jrg: It could be a lot worse. Go read Texts from Last Night.

  52. 52
  53. 53
    Elizabelle says:

    “Don’t think of an elephant.”

    I read the Knoxville paper reader comments. Someone said UT frats have been doing this for 40 years.

    SO: a UT male is standing before me, and I am just imagining him with a wine siphon up his ass. Lovely.


  54. 54
    shoutingattherain says:


    What is so deeply wrong in the American psyche that we not only have record numbers of kids numbing it all out with alcohol, but taking it to such lengths as nearly killing themselves in painful ways.

    Lemme tell you about the college party in 1972 where I was first introduced to “tequila”.

  55. 55
    Comrade Mary says:

    I keep reading the post title while hearing this in my head.

    I am old.

    Also: why does the iPhone want to change “href” to “heed” or “Greg”?

  56. 56
    Raven says:

    @sparrow: Bah. I’ve been sober for 20 years but I ran full blast for nearly 30 before that. My best friends are still from the late 60’s early 70’s and we made an art of getting fucked up. Drink if you win, drink if you lose, drink if you get rained out. Most of us that are still alive grew out of it but all this pearl clutching about “kids” doesn’t cut it for me.

  57. 57
    catclub says:

    At LGM they pointed out that fraternity guys are future State House and Senate members.

  58. 58
    Gin & Tonic says:

    I blame the 21 drinking age. If college kids were able to legally sit down somewhere like human adults and have, say, a pizza and a pitcher of beer, like normal people do, I bet we’d see far less of this.

    I mean I was young and stupid and drank too much in college, but not like this – the drinking age was 18, which gave me opportunities to learn about moderate drinking as well.

  59. 59
    scav says:

    Somebody find Betty Cracker STAT!!! She needs to see this UKish 1% chicken house: Crispin Odey’s galline Parthenon

  60. 60
    Raven says:

    @Gin & Tonic: When I started college 2 months shy of my 20th (after nearly 3 years in the Army) the drinking age was 21. I got thrown in jail for underage 10 fucking days after I came home from Vietnam. Two months before I turned 21 they lowered the drinking age to 18! I always figured when I got straight they would legalize herb too.

  61. 61
    Gin & Tonic says:

    @Raven: Man, you’ve got impeccable timing. I lived in NY, where I think the drinking age was always 18 (and those draft cards were so easy to forge anyway…)

  62. 62
    Raven says:

    @Gin & Tonic: A fake draft card was ONE of the crimes that got me the choice between army and jail on my 17th birthday!

  63. 63
    Grumpy Code Monkey says:

    What is it with frats and booze? Back in my college days (late Cretaceous period), we’d have at least four or five “isolated incidents” a year of frat houses getting busted for underage drinking and/or alcohol poisoning. And our school wasn’t more than a half-hour away from Austin (back when entertainment in Austin was dirt cheap), so it’s not like there wasn’t shit to do on a weekend.

    Of course, the idea of “butt-chugging” would have been inconceivable. What amazes me is that a) somebody managed to come up with the concept, and b) convinced other people that it was a good idea. I mean, damn, college kids can be stupid.

  64. 64
    magurakurin says:


    I knew a few people who did an espresso enema to get jacked up on caffeine

    seriously? What, they never heard of amphetamine? Christ, I understand the desire to get high, get wasted, get fucked up, but damn, take real drugs then. But, I guess there are people who enjoy enemas, so they aren’t hurting anyone. But…damn.

  65. 65
    flukebucket says:


    If we lose that game I will be butt chugging.

  66. 66
    sparrow says:

    Sigh. @MikeJ: No, drinking is not new. And as I said, I’m not telling people not to drink or even get fucked up once in a while. I think kids should be allowed to drink at 16 or whenever their parents choose. I think wet campuses are better than dry campuses. But I’m certainly not going to defend binge drinking until becoming blacked out or dangerously drunk. How is that a controversial stand? How is it pearl-clutching to say, gee, maybe the rise in binge drinking & harm from drinking (one study is here http://www.hsph.harvard.edu/ca.....trends.pdf and there are others) is something we should ask questions about? What kind of person decides that a good way to live their life is getting completely insensate 3 or 4 times per week or more? If my parents or brother were doing that I would be really worried about what was going on with them emotionally. But with teenagers its all ok? What the fuck?

  67. 67
    Peter says:

    @Anatoliĭ Lъudьvigovich Bzyp (Mumphrey, et al.): At the beginning of this semester, I had to walk past recruitment tables for two Greek letter organizations to get to class – a fraternity and a sorority. The sorority always had a few people signing up, but the fraternity table was a ghost town. Maybe they’re on their way out again.

  68. 68
    Raven says:

    @magurakurin: I knew a dude from Oakland that would shoot wine for the rush.

  69. 69
    SatanicPanic says:

    Now I know what I’M going to do this weekend!

  70. 70
    Amir Khalid says:

    As an oriental person, I think this is where I get to quote the Mahatma’s famous quip that Western civilisation would be a very good idea.

  71. 71
    Violet says:

    I’ll be impressed when they shove a catheter up their p3nis and input the alcohol that way.

  72. 72
    Hypatia's Momma says:

    No one is arguing with you about whether or not drinking is acceptable, they are arguing with your assertion that binge drinking among young adults is something totally new, modern, and on the rise. Given that, in the 1800s, small children in London were known to binge drink gin, you’re going to have to come up with some serious evidence to back up your statement.

  73. 73
    Rathskeller says:

    Because I was on the internet back when it was DARPAnet and BITnet, I was privileged to received the “Perverts and Weirdos Digest”, which was one of the first mailing lists. I believe it was issue 1 that went on at some length about how to ingest alcohol through your colon. We kids felt so naughty using the Pentagon official wires to send this kind of stuff.

    It was — considering how likely we were to follow the newsletter’s recommendations — good, clean fun.

  74. 74
    catclub says:

    @Grumpy Code Monkey: These are fraternities. Very little to do with college education.

  75. 75
    Bill in Section 147 says:

    I’m off to sit on a beer.

  76. 76
    Odie Hugh Manatee says:

    I thought you were supposed to get drunk and stick things in your ass, not stick things in your ass to get drunk!

    I’d pay to see them smoke a bowl of weed the same way.

  77. 77
    Mr Stagger Lee says:

    I think Alexander Broughton will be a fine member of President Rand Paul’s staff. :-)

  78. 78
    Forum Transmitted Disease says:

    Of course, the idea of “butt-chugging” would have been inconceivable. What amazes me is that a) somebody managed to come up with the concept, and b) convinced other people that it was a good idea. I mean, damn, college kids can be stupid.

    @Grumpy Code Monkey: After a party at which some irresponsible jerk (ahem) threw the idea out there, a chem major friend of mine came up with a smokable form of freebase caffeine.

    It was awful.

    If he’d sold it to Starbucks he’d be a multi-billionaire by now, I’m betting.

  79. 79
    Steve M. says:

    If you want more fraternity anal obsessiveness, read National Lampoon‘s 1974 story “The Night of the Seven Fires,” which focuses on frat pledges eating frozen hot dogs warmed in other pledges’ assholes.

    (The story is by Chris Miller, whose Dartmouth fraternity experiences were the basis for Animal House.)

  80. 80
    Gex says:

    @Peter: Well I know if I had to take an alcohol enema to join, I wouldn’t even bother pledging. How is that good for their recruitment?

  81. 81
    BGinCHI says:

    Anyone post the article where the father tries to hold up his Republican values to say the cops are not telling the whole truth?



  82. 82
    Thatgaljill says:

    I work on a lot of “coming of age” type parties for my job and the stories I’ve been told shock me… so this may be how boys are doing it, but girls apparently soak tampons in alcohol and insert them to get drunk without the smell of alcohol. Chaperoning a party is a nightmare any more.

  83. 83
    Jerry says:

    Actually, a law enforcement friend of mine was hired to investigate the death of an heir who moved to Florida. It seems that he was an alcoholic with an ulcer that precluded drinking alcohol. So he had his wife give him an enema with dilute (not very much, evidently) vodka.

    He died! Whocoodaknoed? Only in Florida?

    So the family back home hired my buddy to see if he could prove that she murdered him, so she couldn’t inherit his share of the family loot!

    Couldn’t be done, she was rich now. My bud only took expenses. Stupid stupid dumb, he said. How did they ever get the money in the first place, being so dumb?

    Evidently you can’t self moderate your drunk when it comes up your butt. You don’t throw it up in time to save your stupid life. So dumb!

    Darwin at work…

  84. 84
    Michael says:

    @Steve M.: I was in that fraternity at Dartmouth…the hazing is a lot more tame these days.

  85. 85
    Cassidy says:

    @Peter: Frats cost money to join.

    @sparrow: I get what you’re trying to say, I think.

    What is so vapid about today’s society that teenagers would rather live a nihilistic and apathetic existence of constant inebriation?

    Is that right? If so, the answer is, as people are saying, this isn’t new, but I do agree it has gotten worse. It was one thing for kids in the 60’s, 70’s, and 80’s to drink and party, but the use of drugs shot up in the 90’s (I believe) and now while drug use may be down, we have kids texting that she’s woken up with sand in her vajajay, the taste of semen in her mouth and dried in her hair, and she doesn’t remember anything after 8PM. So I’m with you. I think it’s gotten worse. We didn’t do this kind of shit in the 90’s. We did a lot of drugs and one night stands, but I don’t think we were as nihilistic as today’s kids.

  86. 86
    Hypatia's Momma says:

    I have a hard time believing that any young woman does this on a regular basis for more than 15 seconds, or about how long it would take for the screaming pain to kick in. Followed by infections and possible necrotic tissue. Funsy!

  87. 87
    Gex says:

    @BGinCHI: I love how they “decline to elaborate on what specific aspects of the police account are in dispute.” Well, I’m convinced! They could probably win a libel case on that!

    @Cassidy: Interestingly enough, these are the primo years when religious right and family values got amplified in our politics.

  88. 88
    Suffern ACE says:

    Shudder. So I guess this is the question. When you binge drink, you tend to end up vomiting all over the place. In this case, do you have the same reaction? Is the vomitting caused by being drunk or the fact that there is still alcohol in your stomach?

  89. 89
    BGinCHI says:

    @Gex: I love the father’s outrage over his son’s behavior despite the awesome values instilled in him by his patriarch.

    How could a son do such a thing?

    Must be the cops’ fault.

    Fucking responsibility, how does it work?

  90. 90
    Cassidy says:

    @Suffern ACE: It’s your body trying to expel a poison. That’s all. It empties the stomach contents, voids the bladder and colon, and you sweat profusely.

  91. 91
    Hypatia's Momma says:

    Ah, yes. Knew I’d seen this recently:
    Purple Drank!

    An article linked in the comments, from the Huffington Post, goes into some of the “Um, what?” factors that occur to anyone who has ever used a tampon (or, alternatively, has rudimentary knowledge of female anatomy and isn’t completely gullible).

  92. 92
    Gex says:

    @BGinCHI: So personal responsibility and tort reform are for others. Sound about right.

    And even though the government spends too much money, let’s listen to our bruised egos and force the government to pay for a defense.

    It’s unbelievable the way all their values apply to other people only.

  93. 93
    Forum Transmitted Disease says:

    We didn’t do this kind of shit in the 90’s.

    @Cassidy: Hell, we were doing “this kind of shit” back in the 1970s. Granted, I come from Southern California, and where we go so the nation follows, but still, this is not some “new” thing brought on by a society that has turned into a nihilistic, narcissistic, sensation-seeking hellscape that makes Brave New World look like family entertainment. Our society’s always been that.

    My bet is that those of you bitching about how “everything has changed” and “this is all so much worse” just simply didn’t get invited to the good parties when you were teenage dweebs.

  94. 94
    Cassidy says:

    @Forum Transmitted Disease: Wow, that was a lot of projection. First off, since we want to do the big dick contest, I guarantee your pansy asses in the 70’s couldn’t handle a thimble full of the quality drugs we did in the 90’s. Your weak asses got stoned on 1970’s grade ragweed. I’ve smoked pot that will make you see god and ingested various forms of pharmaceuticals that you delicate little flower children wouldn’t even come close to. Secondly, You guys would what? Get drunk, smoke some skunkweed, light a bonfire, and think you had a good night if the local sheriff deputy confiscated your weak ass beer and you felt some tits and tongue by the time it was over? Oooohhhhh….go skinny dipping on the beach; that’s rebellious. Shit. You old fuckers don’t even know what partying is.

    As for the rest of the bullshit, yes it has gotten worse because the social constraints of what’s allowed and not allowed has loosened. The line continuously gets moved. It’s not shocking to sit around in your treehouses and parents basement and drink some beer you got your older sister to buy for you. Hell, they made a TV show about what kind of partying you did. Lame.

  95. 95
    Cassidy says:

    Or, a shorter version: My bet is you wouldn’t know a good party if it drove by you.

  96. 96
    Hypatia's Momma says:

    You don’t seem to know much about 1970s drugs and sex.

  97. 97
    Cassidy says:

    @Hypatia’s Momma: I know you guys got nothing on my generation. That’s part of the problem. The 70’s generation is stuck in that bubble of “we did so much, and we were so different” and really you weren’t. Same with the 80’s, they built on your stuff and took it to the next level and so on and so forth. That’s the nature of pushing the envelope.

    ETA: But, to get back on topic , the only consistent theme is that we were having fun. every generation knew they were going to grow up at some point and were supposed to party while we had the chance. Sometimes, I don’t think this gneeration knows that. I don’t think they see a future worth growing in to.

  98. 98
    👽 Martin says:

    @Linda Featheringill: It’s Tennessee. Darwin is illegal there. If Jesus didn’t want them to butt chug, he wouldn’t have put a box wine sized opening down there.

  99. 99
    Dr. Squid says:

    Somewhere Ann Althouse is weeping because someone bogarted her wine box.

  100. 100
    chuck says:

    It is definitely pearl clutching regarding how bad things are today regarding behavior like wine enemas. The “kids” have always pushed boundaries but then they do grow up. No stopping the carnage that enables some to win Darwin Awards. It has always been so.

  101. 101
    Hypatia's Momma says:

    I sincerely doubt that. The list of drugs in use during the 60s, 70s, and early 80s is pretty fucking long.(and the level of free-wheeling sex was high enough to initiate mass epidemics of, you know, HIV and herpes, so that whole “touch a tit” part makes you sound exceptionally ignorant). MDMA was in use in the 70s. Speedballs were popular in the 70s, as was PCP and ketamine. Fuck, half my class in continuation school was sniffing heroin in the 9th grade and hallucinogens were remarkably easy to obtain, up to and including opium. Amphetamines were so cheap you could trade school lunch tickets for a fistful.

    And no one disses on Humboldt weed without a fight.

  102. 102
    wenchacha says:

    Ass beer.

  103. 103
    Cassidy says:

    @Hypatia’s Momma: Cheap and dirty. Imagine a couple generations of filtered, engineered, cross bred, and refined. And still cheap because our mothers were getting prescriptions for amphetamines and dosing up their kids because we all had ADHD back then. Oh, and we were smart enough to use birth control and condoms. :D

    Call it what you want; still means it’s skunkweed. Hell, you get a better high of cigareetes than that 70’s stuff.

  104. 104
    Jay C says:


    Alexander Broughton, a graduate of Christian Brothers High School in Memphis, initially was admitted to the hospital’s critical care unit.

    Anyhoo, teh Googling is gonna be a problem with young Broughton’s eventual job search.

    Job search? With a BA level of .4 (i.e. four times the usual legal “intoxication” level), it’s more likely to show up on his autopsy report! What is considered a toxic level, anyway?

  105. 105
    El Cid says:

    I think they halted the annual vodka-chugging contest in Moscow because people finally started to give a shit about the contestants rapidly dying of alcohol poisoning.

  106. 106
    Hypatia's Momma says:

    No, you weren’t “smart enough to use condoms” (birth control pills do not prevent STDs, stupid); you were the target of a MASSIVE public health campaign after over a decade of infection and death.

  107. 107
    Cassidy says:

    @Hypatia’s Momma: Oh, you mean BC is only for regulating hormones, treating various conditions, and preventing pregnancy? Who’d have thunk.

    You’re getting a little defensive. Yes, we were smart enough to use preventative measures that were available at the time, but I guess you guys just prefer bumps and rashes on your shit. You also preferred wide collars, disco, and shit drugs, so I’m not exactly impressed. Face it, for your time, yeah you all were brash and whatnot, but each generation goes a little further. Your era of debauchery was a school night compared to mine. And this current generation of teens are doing some pretty crazy shit.

  108. 108
    👽 Martin says:

    @Jay C:

    What is considered a toxic level, anyway?


    Anything in that neighborhood puts you in ‘lucky to be alive’ territory.

  109. 109
    Hypatia's Momma says:

    No, you weren’t all that smart. You still aren’t. Birth control pills were around long before you were born and were in wide-spread use before I started taking them at age 15. They do not prevent any STDs and condoms aren’t good protection against herpes. Someone had to tell you twits what to do, and in blazing letters of fire, at that, and they were not your age cohort. Plenty of high school students in the 90s didn’t use condoms because the males were too selfish and the females were too timid or feeble-minded to nay-say them. Infection rates amongst ravers were pretty fucking high.

    You’re getting a little defensive

    …said the “But my generation invented everything X-treme! *sob*” blustering beetle-wit.

  110. 110
    Hypatia's Momma says:

    @El Cid:
    Well, they aren’t ever gonna cap ol’ Peter I and his cronies anyway, so they may as well stick to normal drinking.

  111. 111
    What Have The Romans Ever Done for Us? (formerly MarkJ) says:

    This is like the South Park episode where Cartman is determined to eat with his rectum and shit out his mouth, and then everyone else starts doing it. Those of us with brains know to laugh at what Eric Cartman does but not emulate him. Apparently he’s a role model for fraternity brothers.

  112. 112
    Cassidy says:

    @Hypatia’s Momma: Awwww…someone really doesn’t like being told that what you thought was exciting is pretty lame. Like I said, thay made a TV show about your level of “rebellion”. It was PG and had Ashton Kutcher. It’s okay, we get it. You had two walk a couple miles, uphill both ways in the snow, to fuck a sweaty, Ron Jeremy lookalike just to get some decent pills.

    Since you don’t catch on quickly, I’m very aware of what BC does dumbass. You’d think at your age you’d have learned to not make assumptions, but then again, your still stuck in the 70’s.

    ETA: Look, I don’t think my generation invented shit. I’ve said before, we did it better than those before us and so on and so forth. So, whatever your problem is, whatever rotten crotch shit you caught, and however early you got knocked up is not my problem. That’s your shit. If you want to try and make meaning out of it with some half-witted , legendary 70’s fiction of unprecedented hard partying, go for it. Again, not my problem.

  113. 113
    muddy says:

    @Mark S.:

    Ugh, can we talk about anything besides wine enemas?

    No, you’ll have to wait for an open thread.

  114. 114
    Hypatia's Momma says:


    Since you don’t catch on quickly, I’m very aware of what BC does dumbass.

    Apparently not, since you tried to cite its use in the prevention of STDs, specifically herpes and HIV infection.

    My generation is the 80s, moron. I just happen to think you’re an addle-pated egocentric with no grasp of cultural history or fact.

  115. 115
    Hob says:

    @Hypatia’s Momma: You’re being trolled.

  116. 116
    sparrow says:

    @Cassidy: Thank you, yes. This is what I was trying to ask/say. Born in 1983 so I can’t claim to know anything about relative hardness of partying (plus, I am a nerd, as someone astutely caught). But there is data, and the harm is increasing. I also find most of American society so vapid I can fully understand the desire to blot it all out. My point isn’t that we need to keep the kids away from the alcohol, but what can we do to stop building such a materialistic, pointless, whose-dick-is-biggest society. Sigh. Now where is a wingnut to tell me to leave if I don’t like it?

  117. 117
    Hypatia's Momma says:

    Nah, Cassidy really is a crapulent child, entirely ignorant of cultural trends and modifiers.

  118. 118
    Chinn Romney says:

    @Snarki, child of Loki:

    Well, if the butt-chuggers used vodka, it would make fart-lighting far more memorable. For the survivors, that is.

    Vodka might have a certain fleeting appeal, but lacks the je ne sais quoi of cheap beer and dorritos. Let that combo steep for an hour and some truly great SBD’s start emerging. Get a slow leaker and you get the added fear that the flames may follow the fuel back up the colon.

  119. 119
    Eric U. says:

    the students come to college now obsessed with alcohol. It’s all you hear them talking about during the first half of fall semester. It really bothers me. I tried to impress my kids with the idea that alcohol is nothing special, and that it doesn’t infer any prestige if you get drunk all the time. It worked to some extent. Not as well as I wanted.

    There is a group of college presidents that are trying to get the drinking age lowered because they believe this will reduce some of the pressure college students feel to get drunk all the time. I think parents need to participate in this though. If all kids hear about drinking is from their friends, it’s not healthy.

  120. 120
    KoolEarl says:

    @Cassidy: If you weren’t around in the 1970s how would you know? The reefer wasn’t ditchweed, we had Columbian Gold, Panama Red, Jamiacan..and there were these things called Thai sticks. Perhaps these strains didn’t have the ultra-high THC content (well, the Thai sticks must have at least came close) of latter day high-grade, but at $40 an ounce we sure had plenty to partake in and the amount you could afford to intake compared to todays exotic expensive strains prices made it a wash.

  121. 121
    dinasour diane says:

    Has anyone notified Hoda and Kathy Lee? UT is getting a visit from the Today Show’ booze hounds on Monday/

  122. 122
    MaxxLange says:

    I can actually remember, through some unexplainable miracle, the moment in college when I realized that playing quarters and mexican at every party was completely stupid, and that it would be much nicer to stand around drinking our beers, listening to music, and having conversations. And I was an alcoholic!

  123. 123
    Death Panel Truck says:

    @KoolEarl: Ah, the good ol’ days (1980) when 10 bucks would get you a quarter of good weed.

    Next thing you know, Cassidy’s gonna tell us the alcohol in the 90s was better. They created a new and stronger strain of it, doncha see?

    Anyone who actually believes That 70s Show was an accurate depiction of the 1970s is a colossal dickhead.

  124. 124
    KoolEarl says:

    @Death Panel Truck: Yep, And that $10 quarter Z lasted you a week as every took turns rolling the joint, packing the bowls and bongs. Surprised that nobody has mentioned Quaaludes. I grew up in Philly where the Rorer plant where 714s were manufactured was located just outside the city limits and security was relatively lax at the plant, hence suburban Philly was flooded with ‘ludes

  125. 125
    KoolEarl says:

    @Death Panel Truck: Yep, And that $10 quarter Z lasted you a week as everybody took turns rolling the joint, packing the bowls and bongs. Surprised that nobody has mentioned Quaaludes. I grew up in Philly where the Rorer plant where 714s were manufactured was located just outside the city limits and security was relatively lax at the plant, hence suburban Philly was flooded with ‘ludes

  126. 126
    FlyingToaster says:

    @KoolEarl: O dear FSM, I remember the Badger Band trashing the Bloomington Ramada after combining ‘ludes and some freakishly strong uppers; we had been planning on heading up there after 11 when someone called and said to stay the fuck away, all hell had broken loose and a TV had been flung out of a window. Half a dozen of their clarinets fled south and slept in the Willkie North lounges.

    That was ’80 or ’81; Jeebus I hadn’t thought about that in at least a decade.

    There were some very, very bad ideas in recreational pharmacology back in the late ’70s and early ’80s; a semester of chem lab was sufficient to keep me drinking alcohol and doing not much else.

Comments are closed.