Pat Caddell Has a Major Sad

Pat Caddell, the resident “Democratic” pollster for Fox News, who is much the same way a “Democrat” as Geraldine Ferraro was a civil rights pioneer and Dick Morris is a fervent Democratic partisan, has a major, major sad:

Oh, you poor baby. When Romney loses, can you promise to move to Brazil with the rest of your ilk until you drop dead and stop providing wingnuts with the opportunity to say “Even the liberal Pat Caddell…” Trust me, I bet Marty Peretz will join you, and you boys in Brazil can have lots of fun conversations about why black people stink, the problems with the untermensch Palestinians, why gays should shut the fuck up and be second class citizens, and how Nancy Pelosi ruined America.

Or, you both could just fuck off and die, hopefully choking to death on your own bile.

BTW- notice that it never occurs to Caddell that the reason Romney is failing is because his ideas are awful, the Republicans are insane and dangerous and represent about, well, 27% of America, and he is out of touch with America. No, no, no… It’s just bad messaging. That’s like saying rectal cancer is unpopular only because it has a shitty logo and the jingle sucks.

92 replies
  1. 1
    BGinCHI says:

    But I thought the rectal cancer logo was a picture of Dick Morris.

  2. 2
    General Stuck says:

    LOL. Was just reading an Allahpundit thread on Caddell. Can’t watch any video with him barking like a Hyena at the moon. The bug eyed fucker gives me nightmares every time.

    Also scanned a few comments at HA, and the entire beast has a sad. Which gives me a happy.

  3. 3
    Mike in NC says:

    Romney is failing is because his ideas are awful, the Republicans are insane and dangerous and represent about, well, 27% of America, and he is out of touch with America.

    But even when 99% of their ideas suck, they can fall back on TAX CUTS to pull in the rubes. Never fails.

  4. 4
    Steve says:

    You lost me with the Geraldine Ferraro thing.

  5. 5

    @Steve: Geraldine Ferraro used “anti-busing” scaremongering to get her way into congress.

  6. 6
    amk says:

    24 fucking minutes ? Pare it down man.

  7. 7
    Liquid says:

    Well, you know the old saying — “Never surprise the Baboons.”

    Actually, no, you probably don’t…damn.

  8. 8
    Steve says:

    @The prophet Nostradumbass: And that means… it wasn’t a big deal that she was the first woman on a major party ticket? Take a look at what President Obama said about her when she died. He didn’t exactly call her the Grand Dragon.

  9. 9
    Anonymous says:

    Rectal cancer, rectal cancer
    Dontcha think it just might be the answer?

    image: a swastika emerging from an anus


  10. 10
    angler says:

    JC is back!

  11. 11
    trollhattan says:

    “Their candidate is stupid.”
    “Very well said.”

    Oh mah, ah do believe ah have the vapours….

  12. 12
    Tractarian says:

    Is it any wonder this guy is depressed?

    Pro Mental Health Tip: Don’t watch Fox News.

  13. 13
    cay says:

    @Steve: “If Obama was a white man, he would not be in this position,” she continued. “And if he was a woman (of any color) he would not be in this position. He happens to be very lucky to be who he is. And the country is caught up in the concept.” Ferraro does not buy the notion of Obama as the great reconciler.

  14. 14
    amk says:

    @Steve: She is dead ? Good.

  15. 15

    @Steve: Obama was much too charitable about her. Do a google search on “Geraldine Ferraro Obama” and see what you get.

  16. 16
    SmallAxe says:

    Awesome JC, love the smell of wingnuts melting under the poll pressure.

    Also too, Caddell should invest in a new F’ing suit WTF is that, is he trying to Farley in the fat guy in a little suit routine or what? friggin 8 inch cuffs, tiny sleeves man. He looks like he rolled out of the Motel 6 on the way in.

    Schadenfreude indeed.

  17. 17
    KG says:

    Jesus, decided to turn on Hannity to see what they are saying… Sarah Palin first complained that Obama is engaging in nation building and trying to spread democracy, and then says that Obama has an appeasement foreign policy. Wha? Huh? Uh? The fuck?

    I’m so confused.

    Also too, the last three years have not been kind to Mrs Palin

  18. 18
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    That’s like saying rectal cancer is unpopular only because it has a shitty logo and the jingle sucks.

    You know, if you turned that over to McMahon and Tate, and had that really sharp Durwood Stevens guy take your account, I’ll bet he could come up with a campaign to turn rectal cancer’s fortunes totally around 180 degrees, yessireebob.

  19. 19
    trollhattan says:

    Caddell’s shirt sleeves have eaten his jacket sleeves. His shirt is a parasite.

  20. 20
    Or something like that.Suffern Ace says:

    Reading his bio, I’m actually glad he joined the other team. He hasn’t advised a winning campaign since 1976. What exactly does he poll?

  21. 21
    AnotherBruce says:

    I never thought I could feel this joyous while watching a 24 minute segment of Fox News. While these guys were talking, you could smell the stink of defeat emanating from the rotting Romney campaign. A lot of us have been saying that Romney has been running an awful campaign. It’s good to hear it being strongly reinforced by these schmucks.

  22. 22
    max says:

    Or, you both could just fuck off and die, hopefully choking to death on your own bile.

    AHA! There you go John! Bile is the cure for what ails you (like last night)!

    Speaking of Pat Caddell, I was totally thinking we should offer him, Galston, Bob Shrum, the entire Third Way (‘Mussolini made the deficits run on time!’) crew, and more besides for a fifth round draft choice in 2027. I think we would totally come out ahead on the deal. Even without the draft pick.

    [‘It’s one thing to have people inside the tent pissin’ out and another thing entirely to have people inside the tent pissing *in*.’]

  23. 23
    BGinCHI says:

    @Or something like that.Suffern Ace:

    What exactly does he poll?

    Keep the animals in the barn.

  24. 24
    Steve says:

    @The prophet Nostradumbass: Obama was the bigger man. You could stand to learn something.

    You know who else was a racist anti-busing bigot back in the day? Joe Biden. Quick, someone tell the President so he can be replaced on the ticket.

  25. 25
    Ash Can says:

    @Steve: She outed herself as a racist when she was working on Hillary Clinton’s campaign in 2008. It broke my heart, because I had idolized her when she ran on Mondale’s ticket. Yes, she was seriously flawed.

  26. 26
    hildebrand says:

    @Steve: Some people learn from past mistakes, others don’t. Perhaps you should learn how to tell the difference.

  27. 27
    Mark S. says:

    That’s the first time I’ve ever seen Pat Caddell. He looks like Mirror Spock who’s let himself go.

    Are these the two clowns who argued that Obama shouldn’t seek a second term for the good of the country and that Republicans would be nice to him if he did that?

    ETA: Huh, I can’t figure out what word I was using that kept tripping the mod filter.

  28. 28
    Or something like that.Suffern Ace says:

    @KG: Isn’t spreading democracy supposed to be the centerpiece of Romneys foreign policy? Although I believe it means installing governments we like, I don’t know if she should go off in that direction

  29. 29
    pk says:

    I watched the whole thing. Basically three idiots agreeing with each other and sobbing into their teacups.

  30. 30
    Mike in NC says:

    Pat Caddell is even uglier than John fucking Sununu.

  31. 31

    Don’t hold back, John.

  32. 32
    Spaghetti Lee says:

    The Bears lost and I hate every fucking one of you.

  33. 33
    amk says:

    @Steve: One is called evolution and the other is called turning vile. I am sure Obama knows which is what.

  34. 34
    trollhattan says:

    @Mike in NC: Born tragically without a neck. Or soul.

  35. 35
    danimal says:

    Well, the Romney campaign may have found a way to guarantee against a 50 state sweep. What’s the matter with Kansas? (via TPM)

    Honestly, I hope they do it. It could be the one act that destroys the Republican Party for a decade. Although that pesky constitution may be an issue for them. The Full Faith and Credit clause isn’t too hard a concept.

  36. 36
    Mark S. says:

    Oh, now I know what it was. Can we take that one stupid troll’s name out of the mod filter (spelled backward is otac)? I was using a word that had those letters in it.

  37. 37
    KG says:

    @Or something like that.Suffern Ace: Yeah, it made no sense because I couldn’t figure out what world they were observing

  38. 38

    @Steve: Biden learned from his past, Ferraro did not. While working for Hillary Clinton’s campaign, she came barely short of calling Obama the “affirmative action candidate”. If you want to continue to stick up for her, be my guest.

  39. 39
    dance around in your bones says:

    Why oh WHY do you want us to click on a Fox News clip???


    You’d probably feel better about the world if you never watched that crap. But it’s nice to have you back in raging form.

    I, for one, amused myself tonight watching old Animal House clips on YouTube and was laughing my ass off. I recommend it. John Belushi had the most expressive eyebrows ever.

  40. 40
    NOT MOTORIK says:

    This is my favorite video EVER.

  41. 41
    GregB says:

    Caddells’ face is that of a man who drank the punch and noticed the turd after the last gulp.

  42. 42
    👽 Martin says:

    @The prophet Nostradumbass:

    Biden learned from his past, Ferraro did not.

    And that’s most of what matters in this life.

  43. 43
    AnotherBruce says:

    Pat Caddell could do great voice-overs for Eeyore the Donkey. He even kinda looks like Eeyore.

  44. 44
    jl says:

    Cole needs to grow a sense of humor. I am in a foul mood and, and I got a few laughs out of it.

    Here is “Romney with balls”, for the guy with the beard.

  45. 45
    BGinCHI says:

    Pat Caddell is the Jay Cutler of pollsters.

  46. 46
    KG says:

    @Or something like that.Suffern Ace: Apparently Hannity is really worked up about this… The whole show thus far has been about “Obama’s failed foreign policy that projects weakness”… Apparently the proper response is to invade Lybia and Egypt and impose the Enlightenment on them (and possibly make them Christian in the process)

  47. 47

    @jl: What happened to that shitstorm over the NDAA ruling?

  48. 48
    Villago Delenda Est says:



    The Enlightenment was, as was the Renaissance, a mistake. Michelle Bachmann has assured me of this.

    No, what they want to do in Libya and Egypt is impose the Inquisition.

  49. 49
    cmorenc says:

    Caddell actually did express a key valid point:
    “It’s not that the American people are stupid, the Romney campaign is stupid”. Actually, he expressed another key valid point: “this is the worst campaign from a challenger I’ve seen in my lifetime…incompetent”.

    Yes, Caddell is an asshole who gets paid handsomely by Fox to pretend he’s still a democrat and speaking as a sage from a democratic perspective, but like Dick Morris and Lanny Davis, he long ago willingly sold out to the dark side of serving the Murdock/GOP propaganda machine. Yes, Caddell is frustrated not merely with the incompetence and poor messaging of the Romney campaign, but it’s unmistakable that he’s frustrated that Romney is losing and Obama is winning. Nevertheless, he did hit the nail on the head with the two points cited above.

  50. 50
    KG says:

    @BGinCHI: Well, I’m of the opinion that if your answer at quarterback is Jay Cutler, than you robavly got the question wrong. And if your answer to a valuable pundit is Pat Caddell, then you’ve probably got it wrong too

  51. 51
    KG says:

    @Villago Delenda Est: Well, given the response to the Spanish Inquisition, no one would ever expect the Lybian or Egyptian Inquisition!

  52. 52
    azlib says:

    And so the blame game begins.

  53. 53
    Or something like that.Suffern Ace says:

    @KG: How is that not nation building? Have they actually looked at what We’ve been building for ten years in Afghanistan?

  54. 54
    taylormattd says:

    There we go, that’s my John Cole.

    Goddamn, that’s a nice rant right there.

  55. 55
    hilzoy says:

    @Or something like that.Suffern Ace: Pat Caddell was a polling whiz in 1976, but if he’s done anything of note since then, it’s news to me.

    I actually worked for his outfit in 1976, before I was old enough to vote. (Never met the guy; I was a phone drone, not anything important.) I think I still have, somewhere, the official collection of insane things people said to us when we were calling them — we used to put them on index cards on a bulletin board, and someone mimeographed them just in time to give each of us a copy right after the election, when we all lost our jobs.

    I definitely remember someone who said to me that she was going to vote for Ford because she had had a dream and Carter was elected and then there was an earthquake and her entire collection of china animals broke. Also someone who said she was going to vote for Carter because God had told her to, and that God had told her to vote for McGovern in 1972, and she hadn’t, “and look what happened!”

    It was very useful to have my total commitment to democracy run headlong into the depths of ignorance one can find in the electorate at an early age, and figure out what I thought about that. Sobering.

    The experience also gave me a lifelong distrust of polls. Watching them actually get done, and seeing e.g. how many people never bothered to make the calls, but just invented their surveys, or called their friend in California instead of the person who was part of the random sample, was, um, illuminating.

    We had a really great office party watching the election results; we had an office pool predicting the results, of course. By state. To several decimal points.

  56. 56
    BGinCHI says:

    @KG: Cutler yelling at Webb is like Hannity yelling at and blaming Obama.

    The difference is that when Hannity hits the tight end it costs him a thousand bucks.

  57. 57
    KG says:

    @Or something like that.Suffern Ace: Well, if you’re being logical, then it would sound like nation building. But for Hannity it’s apparently all about blaming the president for everything, damn him if he does, damn him if he doesn’t.

    I watched through the McCain segment, based on what was said an an earlier thread, I think they edited the replay

  58. 58
    Or something like that.Suffern Ace says:

    @Mark S.: Yes. The best thing Obama can do is quit is a common theme.

    Eta: and I bet he can find the numbers to prove that he needs to dump Biden right now.

  59. 59
    Villago Delenda Est says:


    It’s starting even earlier than the blame game of the McGrumpy/Reads Everything! ticket did last cycle.

  60. 60
    BGinCHI says:


    “I definitely remember someone who said to me that she was going to vote for Ford because she had had a dream and Carter was elected and then there was an earthquake and her entire collection of china animals broke.”

    C’mon hilzoy, you know that was a young Sarah Palin. Could you hear a moose bellowing in the background?

  61. 61
    Turgidson says:

    @Spaghetti Lee:

    And boy oh boy was it ugly.

    The bloom is off the Bears’ rose for some time now. That was fucking painful to watch.

    Maybe the Chicago media will learn not to size the Bears for their Super Bowl rings just because they beat the fucking Colts at home, though.

  62. 62
    BGinCHI says:

    @Turgidson: Every year the Cubs are about 56 games back in August and football starts, the Bears look decent, and the sports talkers just lose their minds.

  63. 63
    Spaghetti Lee says:


    Sarah would have been 11 in 1976. Other than that, your theory does make sense. Maybe it was her grandma.

  64. 64
    BGinCHI says:

    @Spaghetti Lee: You’re saying she wasn’t smart enough to dial long distance?

    Probably right.

  65. 65
    jl says:

    @The prophet Nostradumbass:

    NDAA ruling, what’s that? You think I’m some pundit?

    Back on topic, RedState Update does that kind of stuff better.

    Michelle Obama Booed At NASCAR

    I haven’t checked into RS Update for awhile. Looks like they ran out of steam after the GOP primary. But I’ll check them out during the debates. Better than watching Caddell (sp?) and Schoen (sp?) and whosits, or however you spell their names.

    Edit: problem with the Fox skit is it went on far to long. All the best gags and schtick were in the first five minutes. Then it started to drag, and I started clicking ahead. Though the joke about the 1856 election was good. Lucky I caught that at the end.

  66. 66
    Joel says:

    @Steve: Obama was a bigger man, sure. I still think Ferraro was a terrible person, with a landmark accomplishment. Kind of like Charles Lindbergh, but less significant.

  67. 67

    @jl: You said last night that there would be an explosion of posts about the NDAA ruling, in the blogosphere at least. Where was it?

  68. 68
    Chris says:


    It was very useful to have my total commitment to democracy run headlong into the depths of ignorance one can find in the electorate at an early age, and figure out what I thought about that. Sobering.

    “The best argument against democracy is a five minute conversation with the average voter.”

    “Democracy is the worst form of government, except for all the others which have been tried from time to time.”

    Two dead-on quotes which should always be used side by side and in that order.


    I still think Ferraro was a terrible person, with a landmark accomplishment. Kind of like Charles Lindbergh, but less significant.

    LMAO + burn. Also fuck Charles Lindbergh.

  69. 69
    Donut says:


    Preparations are crucial, but it all comes down to execution.

  70. 70
    fubar says:

    See, this is why I love John Cole. Please, keep the bile up and write like this often.

  71. 71
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    Re: the NDAA ruling’s “explosion of posts”

    Totally lost in all the excitement of Mittens smirking his way to defeat over the last three days.

  72. 72

    @Villago Delenda Est: I just thought it was amusing that anyone thought it would get any traction at all.

  73. 73
    Yutsano says:

    @BGinCHI: Too soon?

  74. 74
    jl says:

    @Villago Delenda Est: Give me a link and I will look at it. I do not recognize the acronym NDAA and can’t find anything about an NDAA ruling in the news.

  75. 75
  76. 76
  77. 77
    JustAnotherBob says:

    God, I loved that video. I was expecting them to share a blade and slit their wrists at the end.

    The Fox Nation is disgusted with Romney the Candidate.

    Life is sweet…..

  78. 78
    Radio One says:

    The only reason why Pat Caddell still gets love from Fox News is because he is a conservative that HST mentioned as being the chief pollster of the McGovern campaign in “Fear and Loathing On the Campaign Trail ’76” That’s it. It’s all about the culture war, and Nixon getting a raw deal, and Caddell still deeply regretting hanging around with Gary Hart and “Hollywood” Warren Beatty during the 1972 campaign.

  79. 79
    dogwood says:

    @Radio One: What? Caddell worked for Jimmy Carter if I remember correctly. McGovern is ’72.

  80. 80
  81. 81

    @jl: Yet you were talking about it last night on Twitter. You RTed someone who used it.

  82. 82

    @Villago Delenda Est: He’s lying. He knows exactly what it means, he was yammering on about it last night on Twitter, quoting Glenn Greenwald and getting into arguments with ABL and others about it. He appears to have deleted some of his tweets about it.

  83. 83
    Increase Mather says:

    Caddell worked for both McGovern and Carter, and others as well. From Wikipedia:

    He has worked for Democratic presidential candidates George McGovern in 1972, Jimmy Carter in 1976 and 1980, Gary Hart in 1984, Joe Biden in 1988, and Jerry Brown in 1992. He also worked for Colorado Senate candidate Andrew Romanoff in 2010.

    He has served as a consultant to various movies and television shows, most notably the movies Running Mates, Air Force One, Outbreak, In the Line of Fire, and the serial drama The West Wing. He was also a marketing consultant on Coca-Cola’s disastrous New Coke campaign.

    According to researchers, Caddell had wide influence in the Carter White House, and was the chief advocate of what later became known as Carter’s “malaise speech”.

  84. 84

    I must apologize to commenter LT for my mistaking him for JL.

  85. 85
    Mnemosyne says:


    I’m getting a feeling Mr. Montgomery didn’t think this through, because if this is his argument …

    Montgomery pointed to a handful of U.S. Supreme Court cases to support his claim a presidential candidate must be a “natural born citizen” from two American citizens.

    … then Kansas will have to remove Mitt Romney from the ballot as well since his father was born in Mexico.

    I guess the Constitution Party is going to get all of Kansas’ electoral votes.

  86. 86
    Radio One says:

    @dogwood: I meant “On the Campaign Trail 72” of course.

  87. 87

    @The prophet Nostradumbass: Ignore that comment, I am a stupid motherfucker, and a terrible reader.

  88. 88
    Rita R. says:

    @Mark S.:

    I know this thread is deader than Romney’s chances of ever being president, but that video was just awesome in so, so many ways. And this was just the perfect cherry on top:

    That’s the first time I’ve ever seen Pat Caddell. He looks like Mirror Spock who’s let himself go.

    Where to start? First of all, when does this show air? It looks something that would be on at 3:00 a.m. on a Sunday morning. And digging up the oh-so-charismatic John LeBoutillier as host? I haven’t even heard his name in something like 15 years. And even that stiff called Romney an automaton!

    Cadell… never saw him before because I’d rather stick an ice pick in my eye than watch Fox, but his frustration and anger at the Romney team’s incompetence was a thing of beauty. (Not that he’s taking sides, of course, and we must remember he is a Democrat.) And I loved when both he and that other pollster loser were giving their prescriptions for what Romney should do to turn this all around — and they were both incoherent! Other than, of course, saying that Romney should buy TV time to give a speech to the nation so we can all be impressed by his dazzling oratory and appeal to the American people. Ummmm, didn’t he just have a convention where he gave his big speech?

    There’s more, but… just… thank you. Thank you John Cole for that.

  89. 89
    Stentor says:

    Boy, that was some sweet schaudenfreude, it was as if I got Michelle Malkin to suck on my dick for a half-hour with those crazy, pissed-off eyes of hers looking up at me the entire time because I was blackmailing her with the pictures of her doing short time at Rock Traxx in Subic Bay with the sailors in Olongapo along Magsaysay Drive. Me love you long time baby, now put your face down in my pubes! Ahhhhh, that’s the stuff! Just like the dick suck bars up in Subic City playing smiles. Mmmm, don’t forget to use your tongue now Michelle. Pretend that it’s Jesse’s little limp noodle in your mouth. You wouldn’t want him to see those shots of you doing DP with the boys from Battle Group Alpha.

  90. 90
    Suffern ACE says:

    @Rita R.: I know the host hates new categories, but Pat Caddell Saves Your Campaign needs to be created.

  91. 91
    TK-421 says:

    I got about 1 min into it before I started hitting my head. Paraphrasing:

    White Guy Host: it’s about 57 days before the election, and…what is that, 9 weeks, 8 weeks?

    White Guy Pollster #1: uh…

    White Guy Pollster #2: it’s 9 weeks.


  92. 92
    tesslibrarian says:

    Running off to Brazil when the nation doesn’t go their way is more accurate than you’d think.

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