Convention Wrap-Up

I just got back to the no-tell motel, and would have been able to step on Anne Laurie’s post earlier if the cops had not shut down an entire fucking southbound lane of a highway. President Obama was on the “Amer” part of “God Bless America” and I was already rushing for the exits, I am that exhausted. Imani, who seemingly has a bottomless pit of energy is heading back to the PPL to meet Heather. I figure I have a long drive, might as well be smart and get to bed early.

At any rate, the entire thing was just great. John Kerry was awesome, and I saw on my twitter feed that a lot of people were wondering where this John Kerry came from. What short memories we have, because John Kerry in 2008 gave one of my favorite speeches:

At any rate, the Obama speech was great, and the place was just electric. There was this crazy older woman about 6 rows in front of me down and to the right who just kept screaming “I love you Obama” and “YES WE CAN” and it was really funny and sweet at the same time.

I’ll have more to write about tomorrow night when we get home, but I did want to note that I think I saw the permanently deranged Robert Stacey McCain in the press room at the Arena.

83 replies
  1. 1
    MoeLarryAndJesus says:

    John, thank you for this site and all that you do.

    A day without Balloon Juice is like a day without some cat following me around demanding butler service. Which might sound negative, but it’s not.

  2. 2
    DFS says:

    McCain showed up in public? Won’t Brett Kimberlin follow him home and start killing his pets or something?

  3. 3
    David Koch says:

    There was this crazy older woman about 6 rows in front of me down and to the right who just kept screaming “I love you Obama” and “YES WE CAN”

    There’s no need to call Ann Romney a “crazy older woman”

  4. 4
    Geeno says:

    I think what surprised me about Kerry was the amount and quality of the humor. He’s a great speaker, but I haven’t seen him be that funny.

  5. 5

    How easily even those of us in the weeds of this shit every day can adopt the narrative of the media. Kerry kicked Bush to the curb in the 2004 debates. But he didn’t counter the Swiftboaters quite quickly enough and we all think he’s bad at this.

  6. 6
    Narcissus says:

    Hey cole you’re the only dude I know who goes on a road-trip with an amazing smoking hot chick and goes to bed early for tomorrow’s drive

    don’t change dude

  7. 7
    WarMunchkin says:

    My favorite part was Bill Clinton. I never miss a Clinton speech.

    Fake audio, but fun to watch if you’re a fan:

  8. 8
    Micheline says:

    Please donate money to the Obama campaign as the Romney campaign will begin its carpet bomb ad campaign:

  9. 9
    BGinCHI says:

    Drive safe Cole-san.

    This is your last chance to tell us about the BBQ you ate.

    Just lie to me if you didn’t have any. You could at least judge the cole slaw for vinegar content.

    It’s COLE slaw, your namesake!

  10. 10

    @Narcissus: Tunch and Lily are waiting.

  11. 11
    SarahT says:

    @MoeLarryAndJesus: What you said !

  12. 12
    Fordpowers says:

    dude. Social anxiety. It’s a thing.

  13. 13
    Cain says:


    Come on, I think ABL is pretty cute. You’re making Heather blush.

  14. 14
    Matt McIrvin says:

    Looks like the big story is going to be that the Obama speech was a failure because it wasn’t the Bill Clinton speech or the Michelle Obama speech. Obama is toast, he’s never going to be able to beat Bill Clinton on election night.

  15. 15
    Jim, Foolish Literalist says:

    There was this crazy older woman about 6 rows in front of me down and to the right who just kept screaming “I love you Obama” and “YES WE CAN”

    wearing a yellow jacket?

  16. 16
    Tractarian says:

    In Romney’s world, the cars get the elevator; the workers get the shaft.

    Gov. Jennifer Granholm

    Just thought I’d share that.

  17. 17
    Anya says:

    This (via Richard Adams at the Guardian) made me sad for these lovely people. I hope they get to meet the POTUS in person.

    “Pity the poor delegates – and there are thousands of them – who couldn’t get in to the arena to watch Barack Obama make his Big Speech live,” writes Ed Pilkington.
    Take Douglas Smith. He drove all the way from Washington DC to be here on Tuesday. When I asked him just now was he disappointed, he said he was “very, very, very, very, very disappointed”. Yes, that’s five verys.
    But he said he was still glad to be here. “I’m disappointed. But happy.”
    Gina Meola-Wentz came even further. She drove 10 hours and 600 miles with her two kids to be in Charlotte, all the way from Ashtabula, Ohio. “Well yeah I’m disappointed, but we’re making the best of it.”
    Journalists are a cynical bunch at heart. But I’ve got to say, the enthusiasm in the Crown Ballroom, from hundreds of Obama supporters who could so easily be mightly upset tonight, is pretty something.

  18. 18
    replicnt6 says:

    OT, but Romney’s come out in favor of cold fusion:

    That’ll teach the Soviets.

  19. 19
    Anya says:

    I bet more people watched President Obama’s speech than Mittenz’.

  20. 20
    BGinCHI says:

    @replicnt6: Romney:

    Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this partition! It is not the right height!

  21. 21
    Hill Dweller says:

    @Matt McIrvin: Ed Kilgore predicted this earlier today.

    Obama could roll out of bed and give the best speech most of these hacks have ever seen. They chose workman like for a reason.

  22. 22
    Comrade Nimrod Humperdink says:

    @replicnt6: Energy crisis solved!

  23. 23
    KG says:

    @replicnt6: Cold fusion? So where does he stand on death rays?

  24. 24
    Anya says:

    “How does he even know my name? I mean aren’t these guys supposed to be these bigwig elites who don’t waste their time on the little people like me, me representing the average American who yeah I did say in Alaska you can see Russia from our land base and I was making the point that we are strategically located on the globe and when it comes to transportation corridors and resources that are shared and fought over, Alaska and I as the governor, had known what I was doing in dealing with some international issues that had to do with our resources that could help secure the nation,” Palin said. “So it’s funny that he would take a little pot shot like that, but it’s funny he even knows my name. “

    Did this idiot forget that she was McCain’s running mate? I swear that woman gets more idiotic.

  25. 25
    BGinCHI says:

    @Hill Dweller: Plus he lays out all the accomplishments and no one thinks that matters?

    Sometimes America is like a skeevy dude who never goes on a second date.

  26. 26
    waratah says:

    @Matt McIrvin: I came to the same conclusion from reading twitter. I think it is funny coming from reporters and pundits because Clinton’s speech was telling it like it is which is what they should have been doing.

  27. 27

    I don’t think the 2008 Kerry is what people were comparing tonight to. Try four years earlier.

  28. 28
    JustRuss says:

    I remember Kerry’s 2008 speech, and thinking “Where was this guy in 2004?” It was that good. Didn’t see him tonight, I’ll have to check it out. Obama did great.

  29. 29
    arguingwithsignposts says:

    @Anya: that cannot be a real quote. is it? that’s not a word salad, that’s like a word garden.

  30. 30
    Mnemosyne says:


    Obama’s speech was about “grim determination”? Really? I think we have another of those British-to-American failures to translate here.

  31. 31
    horatius says:


    little people like me, me representing the average American

    Will somebody tell this lady that she represents the below average American, y’know the mouthbreathing types?

  32. 32
    divF says:

    @Micheline: Done. As big a number as I could manage.

  33. 33
    BGinCHI says:

    @horatius: Does she know where she’s little?

  34. 34
    Person of Choler says:

    So where did all the people go who were going to fill the outdoor stadium but couldn’t fit indoors?

    By the way, what made the guy who was going to stop the ocean’s rise decide he couldn’t fend off a late summer rainfall for a couple of hours?

  35. 35
    rikyrah says:

    when he said


    I nearly cried. it hit me in the gut…all the anger I’ve had at the fuckers who have disrespected him from jump street.

    hell fucking yeah.


  36. 36
    Violet says:

    Thank you, John. It has been tremendous fun to live vicariously through you and ABL. So glad you went. Rest up.

  37. 37
    AnotherBruce says:


    We must have the same cat.

  38. 38
    👽 Martin says:

    I mean aren’t these guys supposed to be these bigwig elites who don’t waste their time on the little people like me, me representing the average American

    Average Americans don’t give up on a job halfway through, and then grift the public for vacation money.

  39. 39
    magurakurin says:

    @replicnt6: But when his scientist find that it doesn’t work he’ll trick Obama into backing it and then he will expose Obama as a fool who was duped by fake science and win. But Simon Templar will rescue the real scientist, a beautiful young woman, and she’ll show Obama’s scientist the real….

    oh wait, that’s a Val Kilmer movie.

    fuck Rmoney, we’re takin’ him out.

  40. 40
    BGinCHI says:

    @Person of Choler: I’m guessing they are at your sister’s place, doing what people do there.

    Don’t be ashamed, a lot of people have poor relations.

  41. 41
    cckids says:

    There was this crazy older woman about 6 rows in front of me down and to the right who just kept screaming “I love you Obama” and “YES WE CAN” and it was really funny and sweet at the same time.

    OT, but two weeks ago when Pres. O was in Vegas, my daughter & I went to see him. Leaving after the speech, two little old ladies (both over 70 easily, both white) met back up, having been seated separately.

    Both were very excited & fired up; one said “did you see? He shook my hand! HE SHOOK MY HAND!!”. The other smugly says “He hugged me!”. First one: “Well, you have that walker. You always get special treatment”. We were falling down laughing.

    Enthusiasm gap my ass.

  42. 42
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Person of Choler:

    Hey, you guys are the ones who think Obama controls the weather:

    Obama, “continues to blame anyone and everyone for the drought but himself,” reads a release from Boehner’s office posted online and distributed to reporters Monday. The quote was attributed to Boehner himself in a Financial Times story. The online post and the press release came from Boehner spokesperson Kevin Smith.

  43. 43
    Mnemosyne says:


    Enthusiasm gap my ass.

    I think the enthusiasm gap closed about 5 minutes into Mrs. Obama’s speech on Tuesday. Possibly earlier.

  44. 44
    BGinCHI says:

    @Mnemosyne: Sad that the guy who made Clerks has sunk so low to be Boehner’s spox.

    It really is a tough economy.

  45. 45
    rikyrah says:

    just made a donation to the President…

  46. 46
    WaterGirl says:

    @cckids: What a great story!

  47. 47
  48. 48
    Hill Dweller says:

    @BGinCHI: I think the wingnuts were lobbying the pundits behind the scenes to start comparing Clinton and Obama even before his speech, ignoring the fact that Obama’s people helped Clinton write it.

    Of course, the Village, scared the Dems’ successful convention might produce a bump, do their best to shit on it. They need that ad revenue.

  49. 49
    Suffern Ace says:

    @BGinCHI: Boehner does often have that look on his face as if he’s just received a stink palm from someone.

  50. 50
    MonkeyBoy says:

    via twitter here is a pic of a distinctly un-angry looking ABL and the girls. She let the girls out and they decided they wanted a drink, or so she says.

  51. 51
    BGinCHI says:

    @Hill Dweller: Agreed. Plus they suck balls. In a non-pleasurable way, for those who don’t want to get up to that kind of thing.

    Whores Race Coverage.

  52. 52
    Anya says:

    @arguingwithsignposts: Unfortunately it’s real.

  53. 53
    Anya says:

    @horatius: I think she’s proud of that fact.

  54. 54
    MattR says:

    @Anya: I am mildly surprised that Palin never went full metal birther. I’m sure there has to be some self serving reason that she hasn’t.

  55. 55
    Spaghetti Lee says:

    Ah, fuck the media. They all had their little ever-so-precious concern-trolly “Obama’s lost his base/lost his enthusiasm/is being too partisan responses” written before the speech even began. Fuck Erickson, fuck Coulter, fuck Malkin, fuck Lowry, fuck Goldberg, fuck Will, fuck Brooks, and super-extra fucks to Jennifer Rubin.

  56. 56
    MoeLarryAndJesus says:


    We must have the same cat.

    Maybe. I have three of the same cat.

    They’re very different, but they all want butler service.

  57. 57
    Mnemosyne says:


    I am mildly surprised that Palin never went full metal birther. I’m sure there has to be some self serving reason that she hasn’t.

    My guess is that she doesn’t want to open that can of worms with a 10-foot pole given all of the controversy and speculation about her last pregnancy.

  58. 58
    MattR says:

    @Mnemosyne: I suspect that is it, though she has never been one to shy away from insisting she be subject to a different set of standards.

  59. 59
    pragmatism says:

    i can’t stop laughing at this from the onion:

  60. 60
    mdblanche says:


    I believe in laboratories, looking at ways to conduct electricity with — with cold fusion, if we can come up with it. It was the University of Utah that solved that. We somehow can’t figure out how to duplicate it.

    That is the really damning part of what he said. He didn’t just make a boneheaded mistake, he revealed that he is fundamentally ignorant about how scientists actually work.

  61. 61
    Spaghetti Lee says:


    Oh, Lord. Some misbegotten wingnut blogger is already tweeting it out as news.

  62. 62
    pragmatism says:

    @Spaghetti Lee: the wingnut butthurt on the facebooks about this is awesome. Ted Nugent should sue them for stealing his 1000 yrs of darkness bit.

  63. 63
    Gil O. Teen says:

    It was a good convention, with some fine political speech-making from Presidents Obama and Clinton, FLOTUS, Gov. Patrick, and many, many others. But let’s not get too cocky. The next eight weeks are going to be about some very dirty politicking.

    We’re already seeing the pre-written stories from various corporate media outlets, explaining how Obama’s speech wasn’t that good, or was overshadowed by Clinton or Michelle, or that, all objective evidence to the contrary, the Democrat Party (sic) is disillusioned, divided, and lacks enthusiasm. At this point, they’ll say just about anything to try to suppress or deny the post-convention bounce.

    Next up, a billion dollars of negative advertising over the next eight weeks, featuring nothing but blatant lies (most of them already debunked) and smears against Obama and Biden. Each new lie or smear, no matter how obviously false, will be lovingly echoed, amplified and explicated in exhaustive detail by the corporate media drones whose paychecks depend on fellating the GOP.

    Combine that with a well-funded voter-suppression effort – the likes of which we haven’t seen since before the Voting Right Act was passed – and it may still be enough to get Rmoney & Lyin’ Ryan close enough to 270 electoral votes to steal the election. They’ll need help to do that, either from Republicans involved in administering the voting in swing states, or, if it comes to that, SCOTUS, but I’m sure that Fat Tony Scalia and/or whoever’s the 2012 equivalent of Kathryn Harris or Ken Blackwell will have their backs.

  64. 64
    dm says:

    I just watched the 2008 Kerry speech — he used the “talk about being for it before you were against it” (about Candidate McCain vs. Senator McCain) and the “before he debates Obama, he’d better finish the debate with himself” (about Candidate McCain vs. Senator McCain) in 2008, too.

    But there’s nothing wrong with recycling good material.

  65. 65
  66. 66
    pragmatism says:

    @Death Panel Truck: HA! That is funnier. a lot of the facebook hurt feelers are along the lines of “why do you only pick on conservatives?” variety. i see them as equal opportunists. The Big Dog and Joey Biden take their share of lumps from the onion.

  67. 67
    Death Panel Truck says:

    @pragmatism: I wouldn’t want to drink a beer with Bush, but I’d happily knock back some Cuervo with “Uncle Joe.”

    And then go for a cruise in the Trans Am to score some tail. ;)

  68. 68
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Death Panel Truck:

    Joe Biden has heard the Onion story and thinks it’s hilarious:

    C/D:  Sadly, we must ask about the Onion story. While shirtless, have you ever washed a 1981 Pontiac Trans Am in your driveway?
    JB: [Laughing] You think I’d drive a Trans Am? I have been in my bathing suit in my driveway and not only washed my Goodwood-green 1967 Corvette but also simonized it.  At least the Onion should have had me washing a Trans Am convertible. I love convertibles.

  69. 69
    mdblanche says:

    @Death Panel Truck: Oh, Onion Joe Biden. You’re the only thing better than real Joe Biden.

  70. 70
    pragmatism says:

    @Death Panel Truck: that reminds me of the astronaut episode on the simpsons when homer calls the Big Dog and asks him if he knows where they keep the tang.
    “If there is anyone who knows where the tang is, it’s you.”

  71. 71
    TS says:


    Speaking of Russia’s neighbor

    I tear up whenever I see Gabby Giffords and if ever there is a reason that Palin will never return to politics it is Gabby.

  72. 72
    RadioOne says:

    There are delusional idiots out there on the internet who think that Obama is going to get a 5-7 point bounce from the convention, and actually believe that the lead will widen after the debates.

    We have to tamp these expectations down now. Almost everyone made up their minds months ago,and it’s going to be a close election.

  73. 73
    Death Panel Truck says:

    @mdblanche: So true.

    @Mnemosyne: Not the same Onion story, but I enjoyed the Car & Driver piece.

  74. 74
    Death Panel Truck says:

    @RadioOne: Concern troll is vewwy, vewwy concerned. Nobody believes a 5-7 percent bounce is in any way conceivable, and minds will definitely change once Obama carpet-bombs Rmoney in the debates.

  75. 75
    TS says:


    We have to tamp these expectations down now. Almost everyone made up their minds months ago,and it’s going to be a close election


    Only ONE reason this election will be close

  76. 76
    mai naem says:

    So, I guess this means y’all aren’t going to to Morning Ho tomorrow. I am a wittle disappointed. Oh, well. I heard the USA! USA! USA! and I figured John wasn’t going to like that. Hey, at least they weren’t shaking their finger foam sticks.

  77. 77
    jonas says:

    @Anya: If she’s such a nobody whom nobody would ever even notice because she’s so folksy and so ‘not elite’ and the little, insignificant governor of some BFE state, why the fuck was she ever qualified to be the vice president of the US?

  78. 78
    hep kitty says:

    Well, as everyone knows, I’m not a huge Kerry fan but that was a good speech. I just wish he’d ease off the botox a bit.

  79. 79
    Odie Hugh Manatee says:


    It’s more like a word dump.

  80. 80
    Emma says:

    @Mnemosyne: God I love Joe Biden. He’s the everyman all Republicans pretend to be.

  81. 81
    Ben Cisco says:

    @Spaghetti Lee: This from another board I frequent:

    I posted this link and facebook and some woman went crazy and told people it was true and even shared it and others joined her. Said they KNEW it was a FACT.
    HOW? WHY? could people think this was true, she told me with all the LIES people talk about Romney this is the fact they are trying to hide.
    I said “Like the fact Romney is a Mormon AND NOT a Christian and his dad was born in Mexico”, she told me that was a lie and made up by MSNBC I’m not kidding. I was blown away!

  82. 82
    Mnemosyne says:

    @Death Panel Truck:

    At this point, “Joe Biden” is a running character in the Onion, so I’m guessing the real Biden has seen more than the one story that they asked him about.

  83. 83
    patrick says:

    via twitter here is a pic of a distinctly un-angry looking ABL and the girls. She let the girls out and they decided they wanted a drink, or so she says.

    nice….JC, did she let you play motorboat?

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