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You are here: Home / Open Threads / Hiding the (Ambulatory) Salami

Hiding the (Ambulatory) Salami

by Betty Cracker|  August 6, 201211:55 am| 138 Comments

This post is in: Open Threads, Politics, Republican Stupidity, Assholes

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Florida Governor Rick Scott, whose popularity in the state trails that of the tens of thousands of poodle-swallowing Burmese pythons that are taking over the Everglades, will be among “seven headline speakers” at the upcoming RNC in Tampa. Well, they couldn’t just keep pretending the sitting GOP governor of the state hosting the convention doesn’t exist, could they? Even though he’s probably worth a minimum of three points in the Obama column come election day?

I’m sure Scott will get a really prime-time time slot, maybe while the building is evacuated to load the balloon dump:

Other “headliners” include John McCain, Condi Rice and Mike Huckabee, which will surely secure the all-important angry cloud-shouter, Bush-dead-ender and I-like-my-chicken-sandwich-with-a-side-of-homophobia demographics. RNC Chair Rinseus Repeatus said it best: “Ours will be a world-class convention, worthy of the next president of the United States.” Yes. And he thanks you in advance.

Please consider this an open thread if you’d like.

[X-posted at Rumproast]
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Reader Interactions

138Comments

  1. 1.

    cathyx

    August 6, 2012 at 11:59 am

    Is he really that unpopular? I thought he and his attitudes were well received in Florida.

  2. 2.

    Yutsano

    August 6, 2012 at 11:59 am

    Rinseus Repeatus is inspired. And has way too much truth to it.

    They’re deploying a new phone system at my office today. I predict much dekicious chaos.

  3. 3.

    c u n d gulag

    August 6, 2012 at 12:00 pm

    What?

    No W or Dick Cheney?

    Who better to articulate *cough-cough* the future Romney economic and foreign policy positions, than the architects?

  4. 4.

    amk

    August 6, 2012 at 12:02 pm

    @c u n d gulag: what, no tundra twit ?

  5. 5.

    AliceBlue

    August 6, 2012 at 12:02 pm

    @c u n d gulag:
    Dick Cheney has other plans, which involve fishing and/or shooting another old man in the face. I don’t know what W’s excuse is.

  6. 6.

    Betty Cracker

    August 6, 2012 at 12:03 pm

    @cathyx: He’s the most unpopular governor in the US — approval rating in the low 30s. He’ll never get reelected.

  7. 7.

    brent

    August 6, 2012 at 12:04 pm

    @cathyx: Nope. Last I saw he was around 31% and frankly, I suspect thats somewhat inflated.

  8. 8.

    Brian R.

    August 6, 2012 at 12:05 pm

    Charlie Pierce always refers to “obvious anagram Reince Preibus.”

    And it’s true, if you rearrange the letters in his name, you get some great ones.

    I can’t decide what I like more:

    Ecru Brie Penis
    Creep In Rubies
    Nice Ripe Rubes
    Incubi Ere Reps

  9. 9.

    Hal

    August 6, 2012 at 12:06 pm

    @c u n d gulag:

    Cheney said he’ll be fishing. Sorry, can’t make it, and no one wants W anywhere near Florida.

    Rinse looks like the lovechild of Jim Parsons from the Big Bang Theory and Jeff Bezos.

  10. 10.

    Nina

    August 6, 2012 at 12:06 pm

    Well, when you elect Lex Luthor you have to live with the consequences.

  11. 11.

    mainmati

    August 6, 2012 at 12:07 pm

    There are certainly a lot of mouth-breathing red necks that like Scott but a lot of people were scandalized that a convicted felon was elected Governor in the first place and that he has been behaving much like his lookalike Voldemort since then. His approval rating is below 30% I believe.

  12. 12.

    Culture of Truth

    August 6, 2012 at 12:07 pm

    Reince Preibus is running the show. There’s a man to inspire confidence.

  13. 13.

    danimal

    August 6, 2012 at 12:07 pm

    Does this mean that John McCain is off the veep list? Oh, how I would love to see McGrumpypants as Mitt’s number 2…

    But seriously, Huckabee makes a lot of sense as veep, is he off the list? (Condi was never really on the list, her mentions were simply to pander to the non-sexist, non-racist Republicans, all 17 of them).

  14. 14.

    Gin & Tonic

    August 6, 2012 at 12:07 pm

    I’m reading that wingnut heros Gibson Guitar signed a consent degree to wood-importing violations, including a $300k fine and forfeiture of $260k worth of illegally-imported wood.

  15. 15.

    redshirt

    August 6, 2012 at 12:07 pm

    What a show! I plan on sleeping outside to get first tickets.

    Better then “The Phantom Menace”!

  16. 16.

    shortstop

    August 6, 2012 at 12:08 pm

    RNC Chair Rinseus Repeatus

    Very nice.

  17. 17.

    Valdivia

    August 6, 2012 at 12:08 pm

    http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2012-08-06/romney-persona-non-grata-in-italy-for-bain-s-deal-skirting-taxes.html

    is this guy even real in his awfulness?

  18. 18.

    quannlace

    August 6, 2012 at 12:08 pm

    But they’ve got Chris Christie, for the bellowing-braggart brigade.

  19. 19.

    Ruckus

    August 6, 2012 at 12:09 pm

    Does anyone think that at sometime we may have a country that does not feature as one of it’s main parties a bunch of bigoted morons who have as one of their main party lines that we should have as many guns as possible so they can rid us of anyone they deem undesirable? Which is anyone who does not look, act, pray, pee and hate like them.

  20. 20.

    Culture of Truth

    August 6, 2012 at 12:11 pm

    @Valdivia: c’mon, like you never fleeced an entire nation at 2,800 percent mark up.

  21. 21.

    Scott S.

    August 6, 2012 at 12:11 pm

    @danimal: I think Huckabee makes too much money on Fox to want to take the pay cut he’d have to for the veep slot.

  22. 22.

    Cassidy

    August 6, 2012 at 12:11 pm

    Since it;’s an open thread….had a relative share a pic on FB showing an OR team doing a prayer circle. The caption was something about “isn’t this the people you want taking care of you” or some other cookie cutter jeebus shit. My first though was FUCK and NO. If I’m getting cut on, I want people who are confident in their skills, not calling on sky daddy to steady their hand.

  23. 23.

    Villago Delenda Est

    August 6, 2012 at 12:12 pm

    “Ours will be a world-class convention, worthy of the next president of the United States.”

    Well, another lie from Rinse. President Obama wouldn’t tolerate having a Medicare fraudster as a speaker at his convention.

  24. 24.

    SatanicPanic

    August 6, 2012 at 12:12 pm

    @Gin & Tonic: That’s it! I’m boycotting, and not since I can’t afford anymore guitars

  25. 25.

    Mark S.

    August 6, 2012 at 12:13 pm

    The rumors are hot and heavy that Paul Ryan will be the veep nominee. I’m not sure Jeebus loves us that much.

  26. 26.

    WereBear

    August 6, 2012 at 12:14 pm

    I still don’t know how one of the perpetrators of the biggest Medicare scam in history got elected governor of a state like Florida, where 19% of the population is retirees.

    But since he’s made a law that welfare recipients have to be drug tested, at his wife’s lab, maybe he doesn’t care. This new law cost a lot more than it saved, but I don’t think he cares about that, either. It was, after all, all about making self-righteous wingnuts feel good that their money isn’t being spent on drugs; not that they feel good about their money going to feed kids, either, I suppose.

    Looks like Rick Scott & his wife are the only ones really happy here. Funny how that works.

  27. 27.

    PaulW

    August 6, 2012 at 12:14 pm

    @cathyx:

    Is he really that unpopular? I thought he and his attitudes were well received in Florida.

    He’s polling in the low 30s here in Florida: intentionally killing a popular high-speed rail project as well as obsessing over voter “fraud” that doesn’t exist has kinda hammered home the fact that less than 50 percent of state voters even turned out for the 2010 election. He got 2.6 million votes (over Sink’s 2.5 million, there was roughly 20,000 votes difference between them) out of 11 million registered voters in a state with 18 million residents. If anyone’s a poster boy for the need for GETTING THE DAMN VOTE OUT YOU FRICKING LAZY DEMOCRATS it’s Rick “What Part of Medicare Fraud Did You Florida Voters Ignore” Scott.

  28. 28.

    redshirt

    August 6, 2012 at 12:15 pm

    @Mark S.: What a dreamboat ticket! The hair! The shoulders! The soulless eyes!

    Picture screaming Beatles Fans. That’s what a Rmoney/Ryan ticket brings to the biggest show of the year!

  29. 29.

    Betty Cracker

    August 6, 2012 at 12:15 pm

    @danimal: I can’t see Romney nominating someone other than Portman, Pawlenty or MacDonald. Maybe Ryan if he reeeally wants to make a radical (bland, white male) choice.

    Huckabee is entirely too colorful, and Romney probably still resents Huck sticking around in the ’08 primaries after McCain had sewn the thing up and Romney was trying to come in second so it would be HIS TURN next. I’m guessing he isn’t the type to forgive that type of impertinence.

  30. 30.

    Villago Delenda Est

    August 6, 2012 at 12:16 pm

    @amk:

    The quitta from Wasilla hasn’t been invited to the con, but will be reportedly in Tampa, holding court, awaiting the floor revolt that will demand her to assume the nomination, assuming the Paulistas can be beaten into submission first, as they have their own ideas about an alternative nominee or two.

  31. 31.

    AliceBlue

    August 6, 2012 at 12:17 pm

    @Betty Cracker:
    I’m sorry to say my wingnut brother and sister-in-law (residents of Lake Mary) are in that 30%.

  32. 32.

    JPL

    August 6, 2012 at 12:18 pm

    When is Mr. 9/11 speaking? Maybe he explain why radio communication worked poorly on that fateful day.

  33. 33.

    Valdivia

    August 6, 2012 at 12:18 pm

    @Culture of Truth:

    who knew right that it would be a great qualification for being President.

  34. 34.

    Martin

    August 6, 2012 at 12:20 pm

    JPL press conference taking place regarding MSL. So far, everything looks great. They’ll deploy the high gain antenna on the rover today so we can talk directly to the rover (rather than routing through Odyssey). The mast will go up tomorrow which has the high resolution camera and other cool junk. The photos so far are from the hazard cameras which are really just designed to spot obstacles around the wheels.

    They just showed a picture of the MSL with the parachute deployed taken from the Mars surveyor orbiter. Very, very cool. Looks just like the animation. The photo is good enough you can see the lines connecting to the craft.

    They landed within about a kilometer of the center of the target zone, which was within their overall target zone. They’re a few kilometers from a large mountain – Mt. Sharp.

  35. 35.

    Amir Khalid

    August 6, 2012 at 12:20 pm

    @Gin & Tonic:
    So would this be good news for Fender?

  36. 36.

    Shalimar

    August 6, 2012 at 12:21 pm

    @danimal: Huckabee would have been the nominee if he wanted to be on the ticket.

  37. 37.

    WereBear

    August 6, 2012 at 12:21 pm

    Didn’t the Romney campaign announce that they were not making the “big mistake” of someone exciting like Sarah Palin, and were openly seeking someone “bland and boring” and yet one that would not outshine the candidate?

    I believe the search continues…

  38. 38.

    PaulW

    August 6, 2012 at 12:21 pm

    @Mark S.:

    The rumors are hot and heavy that Paul Ryan will be the veep nominee. I’m not sure Jeebus loves us that much.

    In most respects, the Republicans currently don’t give a rat’s ass how their budget plans – TAX CUTS FOR THE UBERRICH, DESTROY SUCCESSFUL NEW DEAL PROGRAMS ONCE AND FOR ALL – really work: they genuinely believe most voters won’t notice the details or that the voters will believe the GOP when they say trickle-down/austerity economics will work THIS TIME, WE REALLY MEAN IT.

    /facepalm

    I won’t be surprised if Ryan is nominated for Veep. Merely disappointed that the Republicans’ optics are blinding them to the fact that most Americans are paying attention this election cycle and will reject any open return to Bush-era tax-cut pledges.

  39. 39.

    Ruckus

    August 6, 2012 at 12:22 pm

    @Culture of Truth:
    c’mon, like you never fleeced an entire nation at 2,800 percent mark up.

    No, no I haven’t. Does that make me ineligible for pres?

  40. 40.

    WereBear

    August 6, 2012 at 12:23 pm

    @AliceBlue: We all suffer wingnut relations. I even have some in Florida.

  41. 41.

    Villago Delenda Est

    August 6, 2012 at 12:24 pm

    You know, I still think the veep nominee will be Portman, even though it’s of very little help with taking Ohio.

    Not that anyone on Mitt’s Clown Car Part II campaign staff realizes that, of course. It’s like they’re taking advice from Mark Penn, Bob Shrum, and Donna Brazille and thinking they’ve got this thing in the bag.

  42. 42.

    MattF

    August 6, 2012 at 12:24 pm

    Scott could dress up as a turd. I’ve got a vague memory that’s been done before, though.

  43. 43.

    Commenting at Balloon Juice since 1937

    August 6, 2012 at 12:25 pm

    They should bring back the purple heart band aids for nostalgia’s sake.

  44. 44.

    Older_Wiser

    August 6, 2012 at 12:25 pm

    @danimal: Jesus Christ, the equivalent of 2 preachers on the Republican ticket?

    Where’s my ticket out of this country if that happens.

  45. 45.

    PaulW

    August 6, 2012 at 12:25 pm

    @Shalimar:

    Huckabee would have been the nominee if he wanted to be on the ticket.

    Huck would have been the Presidential nominee if he wanted this year: the Far Right would have rallied to him in a heartbeat and wouldn’t have been dancing from Bachmann to Cain to Newt to Santorum most of the primary cycle. It’s just that Huck 1) liked the money he’s getting from Fox Not-News and 2) sensed that running on a massive tax-cut platform the way the GOP is today wouldn’t work on voters burned out by 10-12 years of Bush-era cuts that made things WORSE. There’s a reason why the “sane” names mentioned for the nomination – Huck, Daniels, some other guy whose name escapes me for the moment – stayed out of the race this year.

  46. 46.

    Scott S.

    August 6, 2012 at 12:26 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est: I’m keeping my fingers crossed for a floor fight — literal, if possible — with all the wingnut players from the past couple years. Bachmann, Gingrich, Palin, Paul (both of them), Santorum, Cain, Trump — just let all the crazy out at once in front of the cameras.

  47. 47.

    Cassidy

    August 6, 2012 at 12:28 pm

    It’ll be Ryan. I’m telling ya. Rmoney’s ego demands a lackey. Ryan may not be the toadie he wants, but it’s the toadie he needs.

  48. 48.

    JoyfulA

    August 6, 2012 at 12:29 pm

    Anybody else notice that the seven announced speakers are white men and women of color? No men of color or white women? That struck me as unusual.

  49. 49.

    PaulW

    August 6, 2012 at 12:29 pm

    If the Tampa Bay Lightning had any common sense they’d take the NHL banners down before the convention opens…

  50. 50.

    danielx

    August 6, 2012 at 12:31 pm

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    Yep, I’ve heard that same rumor – let it be true, so that she can emit word salad on national television (again).

    http://www.tampabay.com/blogs/media/content/sarah-palin-attending-rnc-tampa-well-have-announcement-couple-days

    Now, there is considerable mention of a Sarah Palin-lookalike stripper who will be featured at a Tampa strip club.

    Prediction: Look for Rich Lowry and Bill Kristol at that club and hope the maintenance staff is on their toes.

  51. 51.

    cathyx

    August 6, 2012 at 12:32 pm

    So wait, a red state with aging red voters don’t like voter purging and want light rail? I guess that with so many old people who don’t drive and might want public transportation may have a hard time coming up with a state sanctioned ID card too. Those republicans only care when it hits too close to home for them.

  52. 52.

    flukebucket

    August 6, 2012 at 12:33 pm

    I would love for Huckabee and Nugent to do “Cat Scratch Fever” to fire up the crowd.

    Reince Preibus

    Every time I see that name I think of a battery powered car.

  53. 53.

    Culture of Truth

    August 6, 2012 at 12:33 pm

    @Ruckus: It indicates a lack of initiative

  54. 54.

    Ruckus

    August 6, 2012 at 12:34 pm

    @Valdivia:
    I read the link and what jumps out at me is that people in charge in Italy at time have migrated to the European Central Bank. The Peter Principal keeps getting proven correct. People rise till they fail and then stay at that level or get moved sideways. They rarely get demoted or corrected for being a wrong as can be, they just keep going. The energizer bunnies of wrong. The world’s economic systems are littered with them. And the world suffers for it.

  55. 55.

    Alex S.

    August 6, 2012 at 12:35 pm

    @brent:

    It’s probably inflated by 4%.

  56. 56.

    Amir Khalid

    August 6, 2012 at 12:37 pm

    Paul Ryan’s Da Man wit Da Budjit Plan. As far as risk of outshining Mitt goes, doesn’t that count against him?

    Although it has to be said: after Mitt’s I’m So Not Ready For Prime Time World Tour, a flashlight with dead batteries would be at risk of outshining him.

  57. 57.

    Martin

    August 6, 2012 at 12:37 pm

    @JoyfulA: 7 is a pretty small sample size. Condi is only there to help make Mitt look less clueless on FP. The GOP have a number of men of color to go to, so I don’t read anything into the lineup.

    The entirety of the GOP as a party now is just a colossal fuckup. They’re trapped between two large, disjointed factions. Women and minorities aren’t a central component to either.

  58. 58.

    Ruckus

    August 6, 2012 at 12:37 pm

    @Culture of Truth:
    Not sure initiative is the correct word. Lack certainly fits though.

  59. 59.

    Valdivia

    August 6, 2012 at 12:38 pm

    @Ruckus:

    so true. and depressing.

  60. 60.

    Jay C

    August 6, 2012 at 12:39 pm

    @Commenting at Balloon Juice since 1937:

    Naaah, I think 2012’s RNC equivalent of the Purple Heart Band-aid is more likely to be that doctored photo of Obama as with-doctor with the bone through his nose, and some clever [sic] dig at “Obamacare”.

    And that’s likely to be one of the more polite references to the President…

  61. 61.

    Hungry Joe

    August 6, 2012 at 12:40 pm

    The election’s all but over, according yesterday’s editorial in UT San Diego (formerly the Union-Tribune). “Romney in a Landslide,” the headline declares, ” … largely due to the failure of the Obama economic policies and repudiation of his attempt to move the country toward European socialism.” Furthermore, the lines at Chick-fil-A proved that “Americans want their country back.”

    This just a couple of weeks after they listed the five worst Presidents in American history, with Obama #1 and George W. Bush nowhere to be seen.

    Do I hear any nominations for whackier major (using the term loosely) newspapers?

  62. 62.

    Patricia Kayden

    August 6, 2012 at 12:42 pm

    Shrug. Since I won’t be watching, they could resurrect the Apostle Paul, Ronald Reagan and John Wayne and I still wouldn’t be interested.

    I guess I’ll hear about any crazy antics from those who brave the shark tank to attend. That’s more than enough.

    P.S. Wonder if the Ron Paulites will provide any entertaining for those of us on the other side, who otherwise will not be paying attention.

  63. 63.

    joes527

    August 6, 2012 at 12:45 pm

    @Hungry Joe: you still take that rag? They stopped even pretending to be a real newspaper last November.

    EDT: You may as well read the OC Register.

  64. 64.

    Yutsano

    August 6, 2012 at 12:45 pm

    @Hungry Joe: Apparently they don’t count electoral college votes in Wungnuttia.

  65. 65.

    Martin

    August 6, 2012 at 12:46 pm

    Just read about the arson at the mosque in Joplin. So, 2 terrorist attacks in 24 hours inside the US. When does the GOP fully throw Bachmann under the bus?

  66. 66.

    J.D. Rhoades

    August 6, 2012 at 12:48 pm

    Huh. Rasmussen finally has Obama up by 2. Rasmussen, for crying out loud.

  67. 67.

    lonesomerobot

    August 6, 2012 at 12:49 pm

    let me help with Condi’s convention speech:
    “I don’t think anybody could have predicted that they would try to use a clueless rich white guy as a candidate.”

  68. 68.

    Villago Delenda Est

    August 6, 2012 at 12:50 pm

    @PaulW:

    The smarter (relatively) Rethug potential nominees knew this year was bad for an attempt to retake the White House, for three reasons.

    First, running against an incumbent is always difficult, unless he’s totally screwed up everything, and Obama has not done that.

    Second, not enough amnesia about who created this mess in the first place, and who is working the hardest to prevent a clean up of the mess. Hint: Tea bags are full, no room to remove any trash in a tea bag.

    Third, Obama is personally popular and Obamacare is in the process of being a smash hit. It will only get better over time, because some of the key problems with the current system are addressed. Certainly not all of them (I still don’t like the parasitical health “insurance” industry around) but it’s an incremental improvement.

    There’s a reason why the Rethug primary process was all clown car, all of the time. The only adult in the field was Rmoney, and he’s marginal.

  69. 69.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    August 6, 2012 at 12:53 pm

    I’m glad to see Scott’s numbers suck, during the recent Condi for Veep Boomlet, aka Stop talking about my tax returns boomlet, I was shocked and more than a little disgusted to see She of the PDB and Mushroom Clouds has a 65% favorability rating, but I hope that her appearance will met with some helpful reminders from Plouffe, Axelrod et al that she was not only a stunningly incompetent NSC Chair and a dishonest and useless SOS, but she is a fucking neocon, and Our Willard wants to hand the military back to the neocons.

  70. 70.

    Mark S.

    August 6, 2012 at 12:54 pm

    @Amir Khalid:

    You gotta FIRE UP THE BASE Sarah Palin was a good pick cause FIRE UP THE BASE Mitt knows the Ryan budget is electoral poison, but you gotta FIRE UP THE BASE 27% and losing all the swing states FIRE UP THE BASE

    FIRE UP THE BASE

  71. 71.

    The Moar You Know

    August 6, 2012 at 12:55 pm

    I’m reading that wingnut heros Gibson Guitar signed a consent degree to wood-importing violations, including a $300k fine and forfeiture of $260k worth of illegally-imported wood.

    @Gin & Tonic: Can’t wait until that’s formalized, I’ve got a lot to say on the subject and haven’t been able to.

  72. 72.

    PaulW

    August 6, 2012 at 12:55 pm

    @J.D. Rhoades:

    Huh. Rasmussen finally has Obama up by 2. Rasmussen, for crying out loud.

    That’s odd, it’s not October yet.

    Could be Ras is tweaking the polls now so that the planned post-convention bump will look better…

  73. 73.

    SenyorDave

    August 6, 2012 at 12:57 pm

    Is there anyone who couldn’t imagine many of the current GOP white male clowns in a white hood burning a cross in someone’s lawn?

  74. 74.

    lonesomerobot

    August 6, 2012 at 12:58 pm

    @The Moar You Know: Say all you want. Here, I’ll say something I happen to know – the President of Gibson’s North American operations is leaving the company this month.

  75. 75.

    SatanicPanic

    August 6, 2012 at 12:58 pm

    @Hungry Joe: OMG, I haven’t read them in years, how far they have fallen, even from where they were 5 years ago, which was pretty low to begin with. Thas was WND level commentary right there. Maybe even John Rocker level.

  76. 76.

    lonesomerobot

    August 6, 2012 at 12:59 pm

    @SenyorDave: Hell, Michael Steele would do it if they’d only let him be the GOP Chair again.

  77. 77.

    JoyfulA

    August 6, 2012 at 12:59 pm

    @Martin: Yes, but—the three women of color are exactly 1 African American, 1 Hispanic, and 1 Asian?

  78. 78.

    Villago Delenda Est

    August 6, 2012 at 12:59 pm

    @Mark S.:

    OvenMitt knows that the base does not trust him. As I’ve pointed out before, he’s handcuffed…he can’t fire up the etch-a-sketch and tack to the center, because the crew will mutiny if he tries.

    He’s got to keep the base in line. This will kill him in the general.

  79. 79.

    Martin

    August 6, 2012 at 1:00 pm

    @PaulW: That’d be out of pattern. Ras has always skewed the polls heavily in favor of a high GOP turnout pre-convention, and then gone with a more realistic turnout model post-convention. Their polls have always been worth looking at in the last 2-3 months – and are relatively accurate – and always been worth ignoring prior to that.

  80. 80.

    Hungry Joe

    August 6, 2012 at 1:00 pm

    @joes527: Can’t help it — I was a reporter/editor there for many years, and still have some friends on the paper who are managing to do good work.

  81. 81.

    JoyfulA

    August 6, 2012 at 1:02 pm

    I predict the VEEP nominee is Gov. McDonnell of Virginia. He’s a RWNJ but doesn’t visibly foam at the mouth.

  82. 82.

    peach flavored shampoo

    August 6, 2012 at 1:05 pm

    Rosanne Barr, comedianne, is running for president. I am not making this up.

  83. 83.

    Martin

    August 6, 2012 at 1:06 pm

    @JoyfulA: More notably, other than Condi and the former nominee, they’re all governors or former governors. I think that’s more telling than their gender or ethnicity.

    So far, it looks like the the convention will be even further devoid of any national policy clarification other than ‘Obamacare bad!’.

  84. 84.

    Villago Delenda Est

    August 6, 2012 at 1:07 pm

    @peach flavored shampoo:

    She’s a more serious in tone candidate than the asstard Trump.

  85. 85.

    redshirt

    August 6, 2012 at 1:08 pm

    @Martin: When the wingnuts start shooting up stock brokers and the like. Till then, this is all just “creative destruction”.

  86. 86.

    Belafon (formerly anonevent)

    August 6, 2012 at 1:09 pm

    @Mark S.:

    “Fire it up! Fire it up!”

    (Crow fan)

  87. 87.

    JoyfulA

    August 6, 2012 at 1:09 pm

    @Martin: Yes, but I’m still amused. I am easily amused.

  88. 88.

    PurpleGirl

    August 6, 2012 at 1:09 pm

    About a half-hour ago I heard a TV commercial for a new Fox news channel — in Spanish. They are going after the Spanish market now.

  89. 89.

    wrb

    August 6, 2012 at 1:10 pm

    I’m betting Ryan. The Dems like the idea of tying Mitt as tightly as possible to Ryan’s plan, so they will be pleased, but none the less Ryan is the only one suited to Mitt’s MBA vulture capitalist values- he’s the only one Bain would hire.

  90. 90.

    Hill Dweller

    August 6, 2012 at 1:10 pm

    @JoyfulA: The mandatory vaginal probe legislation doomed McDonnell’s prospects. Romney is still politically inept enough to pick him, but I have my doubts.

  91. 91.

    lonesomerobot

    August 6, 2012 at 1:16 pm

    @Hill Dweller: I like Todd Palin’s veep chances. Everybody knows he was the one really running the show in Alaska, and now he’s getting an online degree in military training so it’s all good.

  92. 92.

    Maude

    August 6, 2012 at 1:16 pm

    @peach flavored shampoo:
    I saw that. She wants attention.

    @PurpleGirl:
    He/she will turn it off.

  93. 93.

    Belafon (formerly anonevent)

    August 6, 2012 at 1:17 pm

    @Hill Dweller: Do you think the Dems could pass out vaginal probes at their convention if McDonnell is chosen? They could be the purple heart bandaids of 2012.

  94. 94.

    Roger Moore

    August 6, 2012 at 1:18 pm

    @Scott S.:

    I’m keeping my fingers crossed for a floor fight—literal, if possible

    Unfortunately, the Secret Service is insisting that guns not be brought into the convention center.

  95. 95.

    Elizabelle

    August 6, 2012 at 1:19 pm

    Florida Governor Rick Scott, whose popularity in the state trails that of the tens of thousands of poodle-swallowing Burmese pythons that are taking over the Everglades …

    You do got a way with a phrase, Ms. Cracker.

  96. 96.

    Elizabelle

    August 6, 2012 at 1:23 pm

    @Hungry Joe:

    I saw the earlier Obama as worst president ever.

    That paper has no shame and no credibility.

    ETA: Oh, you used to work there, and have friends still employed? How sad.

    A job’s a job, but it would be better to see the paper shuttered than defiled to this extent.

  97. 97.

    SiubhanDuinne

    August 6, 2012 at 1:26 pm

    @peach flavored shampoo: True. With Cindy Sheehan as her running mate.

  98. 98.

    Cassidy

    August 6, 2012 at 1:28 pm

    @Roger Moore: How dare Big Gubmint get in the way of their Constitutional right to a crossfire.

  99. 99.

    NCSteve

    August 6, 2012 at 1:30 pm

    @amk:

    what, no tundra twit ?

    Nope. She’s officially a has-been now. Nikki Haley will be filling the role of Republican Governor with Ladyparts Who Causes Crazed Angry Old White Guys to Sprout Their First Viagra-Free Wood in Years at this convention.

    Nothing left for Caribou Barbie except a celebrity has-been spread in Playboy (And oh, it’s coming. Don’t doubt it for a second).

  100. 100.

    Turgidson

    August 6, 2012 at 1:31 pm

    @peach flavored shampoo:

    Well, I guess the PUMAs have someone to vote for now. All eleven of them.

  101. 101.

    Origuy

    August 6, 2012 at 1:38 pm

    @peach flavored shampoo:

    Rosanne Barr, comedianne, is running for president. I am not making this up.

    She was running for the Green nomination, but they picked Jill Stein. So now she’s going for the Peace and Freedom Party, eh?

  102. 102.

    Linda Featheringill

    August 6, 2012 at 1:39 pm

    Ryan as a Veep candidate would be wonderful. But I know I haven’t been good enough to merit that.
    And I suspect the rest of the country hasn’t either.

    But it would be so nice if Team Obama could make Ryan’s budget plan the theme of the election. And educate the public in all of its guts and gore.

    If the population as a whole understood the Ryan budget, I think even the Senate and House contests would turn to the Dems.

  103. 103.

    Haydnseek

    August 6, 2012 at 1:40 pm

    @amk: Word has it that the Tundra Twit will be there, but not actually part of the convention. I predict that she’ll do one of her bus tour “vacations” and just happen to be in Tampa during the convention. What a coinkydink! She hasn’t been invited to the cool kids party, but she still has to drive up and down the street in front of the party house with the stereo playing really loud.

  104. 104.

    Jim, Foolish Literalist

    August 6, 2012 at 1:41 pm

    @Origuy: Yup. She wants Cindy Sheehan to be her running mate, it’s not clear if CS has accepted.

  105. 105.

    Mnemosyne

    August 6, 2012 at 1:41 pm

    @danimal:

    Mike Huckabee will not be the Republican presidential or vice presidential nominee as long as those four dead cops in Washington state stay dead.

  106. 106.

    The Moar You Know

    August 6, 2012 at 1:43 pm

    Say all you want. Here, I’ll say something I happen to know – the President of Gibson’s North American operations is leaving the company this month.

    @lonesomerobot: Until I see a judgement, not yet. Too many people I know whose livelihoods are connected to that company. I will say this: Gibson was nailed dead to rights for a deliberate and systematic violation that has been going on for decades.

  107. 107.

    MikeJ

    August 6, 2012 at 1:45 pm

    @Mnemosyne: If only there had been somebody with a gun in that coffee shop…

  108. 108.

    The prophet Nostradumbass

    August 6, 2012 at 1:49 pm

    @Hungry Joe: How long until it goes the way of the Sacramento Union?

  109. 109.

    FFrank

    August 6, 2012 at 1:50 pm

    Heads up on GOS

    Guy from WV has two 4 yr old dogs, a 14 yr old cat and a Guinea pig he can’t take care of anymore. They don’t know how to post here.

    I can’t take care of them.

  110. 110.

    ...now I try to be amused

    August 6, 2012 at 1:53 pm

    “Ours will be a world-class convention, worthy of the next president of the United States.”

    In the sense that President Obama has been blessed with having a bunch of incompetent loons for opponents, I expect it will be.

  111. 111.

    Chinn Romney

    August 6, 2012 at 1:53 pm

    The linked article didn’t mention it, but I have it on good authority that both Rick Santorum and Newt are setting up tables in the Parking Lot so they can hawk their surplus campaign swag. I’m not sure they thought their support of bankruptcy reform all the way through.

  112. 112.

    Betty Cracker

    August 6, 2012 at 1:54 pm

    @Haydnseek:

    She hasn’t been invited to the cool kids party, but she still has to drive up and down the street in front of the party house with the stereo playing really loud.

    Great metaphor! I still say they grudgingly invite her. They’re too afraid of the base to completely dis her.

  113. 113.

    The Moar You Know

    August 6, 2012 at 1:56 pm

    Say all you want. Here, I’ll say something I happen to know – the President of Gibson’s North American operations is leaving the company this month.

    @lonesomerobot: But in the meantime I can tell you a story. Probably has a bit to do with why this guy is leaving.

    The first time I met Henry Juszkiewicz was at the 1997 Summer NAMM show. He had two black eyes, the result of him starting a fight he could not finish with a fellow golfer at one of those resorts for the 1%.

    Yeah, he’s the kind of Tough Guy who throws down on fellow 1%ers, but can’t even finish the fights he starts.

    And….it looks like he’s rolled over on everybody. Statement of criminal wrongdoing and all that. Be prepared for much GOP weeping.

  114. 114.

    TenguPhule

    August 6, 2012 at 1:57 pm

    Unfortunately, the Secret Service is insisting that guns not be brought into the convention center.

    Firecrackers outside the convention center as they walk through the plastic tunnel of A/C.

    Then enjoy the show.

  115. 115.

    Haydnseek

    August 6, 2012 at 1:58 pm

    @The Moar You Know: Although my Les Paul was manufactured long before this legislation was even conceived, it hasn’t kept my Stratocaster from from giving off this weird “I told you so” vibe.

  116. 116.

    Hill Dweller

    August 6, 2012 at 1:58 pm

    Why are gas prices skyrocketing again?

  117. 117.

    Cassidy

    August 6, 2012 at 2:00 pm

    @Hill Dweller: Someone wants a new yacht.

  118. 118.

    Haydnseek

    August 6, 2012 at 2:02 pm

    @Betty Cracker: I hope you’re right. It will make for even more compelling, if bizarre, television.

  119. 119.

    Hungry Joe

    August 6, 2012 at 2:05 pm

    @The prophet Nostradumbass: Well, the Sac Union was competing with the Bee; UT San Diego is the only dead tree in town.

  120. 120.

    Hill Dweller

    August 6, 2012 at 2:05 pm

    @Cassidy: That sounds about right. I’ve heard numerous explanations: heat affecting the refineries; a dictator in the Middle East farted too loudly; market manipulation in hopes of ousting Obama; but a new yacht is as plausible as the rest.

  121. 121.

    lonesomerobot

    August 6, 2012 at 2:06 pm

    @The Moar You Know: I live in Gibson territory, the one departure I mentioned above is not the first I know of (or last by any means). Methinks the word is out and those in the know are splitting before they get the stench on them.

    Of course, even with the admission from Gibson, there still is no stopping the turdburgling whack jobs from blaming Obama somehow.

  122. 122.

    Cassidy

    August 6, 2012 at 2:07 pm

    I live in Gibson territory,

    Neon lights and noodle stands while it rains…all the time?

  123. 123.

    Arm The Homeless

    August 6, 2012 at 2:11 pm

    @PurpleGirl: They have been running for a few months here in Florida. I think it’s actually pretty important that there be some mechanism to shine the same light on their spanish “news” as MM now does with their english “news”.

    FOX has a lot of the contracts to broadcast futbol, which means they are going to start with a large portion of the latino audience, if only for sports related reasons.

    I fully expect that most of the producers and writers will be hacks from the GOP Cuban community as well as retreads from the Fortuno administration

  124. 124.

    Todd

    August 6, 2012 at 2:14 pm

    @Hill Dweller:

    Why are gas prices skyrocketing again?

    The Textards sitting atop the energy distribution chain are gaming the election.

    Filibuster Obama on nominations and economic programs, blame him for an anemic recovery. Block stimulus spending targeted at local government through filibuster while selling austerity, then blame Obama for public sector layoffs. Jack up prices arbitrarily in the energy sector, blame Obama.

    Sad that the man isn’t the tyrant they claim him to be – he could just declare them all to be the traitors they are and hang them like scabrous dogs.

  125. 125.

    The Moar You Know

    August 6, 2012 at 2:16 pm

    About a half-hour ago I heard a TV commercial for a new Fox news channel—in Spanish. They are going after the Spanish market now.

    @PurpleGirl: Fox Latino has been around for quite some time now. What is hilarious is to see how the same stories are covered completely differently on the two channels.

    It’s almost like they’re trying to hide something from the Spanish-speaking community. I wonder what that could be?

  126. 126.

    Arm The Homeless

    August 6, 2012 at 2:27 pm

    @The Moar You Know: This is a collaboration with a Columbian news channel, it will be called MundoFox. Supposedly they will not have any day-to-day interaction (HA!).

    The interests which are behind MundoFox, lean very heavily towards corporatist, with plenty of banksters waiting in the wings. Here is the majority stock holder. Be sure to check out his partners’ holdings as well.

  127. 127.

    JoyfulA

    August 6, 2012 at 2:44 pm

    @Hill Dweller: McDonnell talked so nicely, though, after the debacle, unlike “just close your eyes” Corbett. And they don’t care about female votes anyhow.

  128. 128.

    tjmn

    August 6, 2012 at 2:46 pm

    @shortstop:

    Yeah. Sounds like a stuttering monkey.

  129. 129.

    Martin

    August 6, 2012 at 3:09 pm

    @FFrank:

    Guy from WV has two 4 yr old dogs, a 14 yr old cat and a Guinea pig he can’t take care of anymore

    I didn’t know Cole had a guinea pig.

  130. 130.

    Jay in Oregon

    August 6, 2012 at 3:11 pm

    @The Moar You Know:

    It’s almost like they’re trying to hide something from the Spanish-speaking community. I wonder what that could be?

    That they (the Spanish-speaking community) are the REAL racists, of course.

  131. 131.

    karen marie

    August 6, 2012 at 3:13 pm

    @mainmati: Although Scott could morally be considered a felon, technically he’s not — the corporation admitted to 14 felonies, with the aid of the Bush Justice Department, and by the time that happened he had long since resigned.

  132. 132.

    karen marie

    August 6, 2012 at 3:20 pm

    @WereBear:

    It was, after all, all about making self-righteous wingnuts feel good making a sweet, easy profit

    Making self-righteous wingnuts feel good was just the icing on the cake.

  133. 133.

    Maude

    August 6, 2012 at 3:22 pm

    @Martin:
    LOL

  134. 134.

    Nellcote

    August 6, 2012 at 3:42 pm

    LaPalin should rent out the ChickAFil nearest the convention for her counter pep rally.

  135. 135.

    flukebucket

    August 6, 2012 at 4:53 pm

    @Hill Dweller:

    Same reason they will plummet again soon. Who the fuck knows?

  136. 136.

    The Other Chuck

    August 6, 2012 at 5:21 pm

    @Brian R.: If you remove all the vowels from “Reince Priebus” you get *RNC PR BS*

  137. 137.

    Kevin

    August 6, 2012 at 5:44 pm

    …I’m still waiting for Luke Russert to question why the unpopular with anyone, especially the ever important “middle” Republicans are speaking at the convention…

  138. 138.

    Jebediah

    August 6, 2012 at 9:45 pm

    @Brian R.:

    Charlie Pierce always refers to “obvious anagram Reince Preibus.”

    As I had remarked over at his place, it’s even better – just disemvowel his name, and you get his whole reason for being.

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