Rand Paul is Trying to Attach a Personhood Amendment to a Flood Insurance Bill — What #WaronWomen?

Noted Libertarian and neck-stomp enthusiast Rand Paul loves him some small government.

He loves it so hard that he’s running around trying to attach a “life begins at conception” amendment to a Flood Insurance bill.

A FLOOD INSURANCE BILL, PEOPLE.

From Politico:

The Senate’s flood insurance program looked like it was headed toward smooth passage – but now, there appears to be an abortion-related wrinkle.

Yes, abortion.

That’s at least according to Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid (D-Nev.), who said Tuesday that a Republican senator is insisting on a vote on an amendment defining “when life begins.” Reid didn’t name the senator, but it was Sen. Rand Paul (R-Ky.) who had offered the amendment.

“I think some of this stuff is just – I have been very patient working with my Republican colleagues in allowing relevant amendments on issues, and sometimes we even do non-relevant amendments,” Reid said. “But really, on flood insurance?”

“After all the work that’s been put on this bill, this is ridiculous that somebody says ‘I’m not going to let this bill go forward unless I have a vote on when life begins,’” Reid continued. “I am not going to do that, and I think I speak for the majority of senators.”

Calling the request “outlandish,” Reid said he was told of Paul’s demands on Monday night.

And while he’s allowed various unrelated amendments to bills as of late – last week’s farm bill being one example – Reid put his foot down on the latest request.

“We’ll either do flood insurance with amendments dealing with flood insurance or we won’t do it,” Reid said.

Paul responded to reporters Tuesday: “I think the people who believe in protecting life would like to see a vote.”

Ok, Rand. So big government = BAD. But vaginal governments = GOOD.

Somebody wakes e up when that makes sense. Until such time, I’ll be napping and dreaming about how great is to be a woman in the good ol’ USA.

AMERCIA: FUCK YEAH.

[image via Mario Piperni]

[x-posted at ABLC]

61 replies
  1. 1

    […] at Balloon Juice] Angry Black Related Posts:Rand Paul "Detained" by TSA on his way to an Anti-Choice […]

  2. 2
    Roger Moore says:

    Ok, Rand. So big government = BAD. But vaginal governments = GOOD.

    Yup. They’re trying to shrink government until it’s small enough to probe a woman’s vagina.

  3. 3
    Betty Cracker says:

    @Roger Moore: LOL! Well played, sir.

  4. 4
    Felinious Wench says:

    I’m thinking Rand jumped the shark on this one.

  5. 5
    FuriousPhil says:

    Somebody should make a law against putting irrelevant crap on legitimate legislation….oh wait…

  6. 6
    beltane says:

    I have to applaud Rand Paul’s Hayekian modesty and commitment to Burkean restraint.

  7. 7
    kay says:

    “I think the people who believe in protecting life would like to see a vote” is classic Rand Paul.

    Nasty, sanctimonious, yet oddly cowardly with that ‘the people’.

    Rand Paul doesn’t want the vote. No sir. “The people” do. The good and pure people.

  8. 8
    Lurker says:

    @Felinious Wench:

    I’m thinking Rand jumped the shark on this one.

    Maybe, but I doubt it’ll affect his standing among his starry-eyed fans.

  9. 9
    Face says:

    And Mark Rubio haz a sad on TDS when he cries that Mr Reid wont let Republican amendments to bills be voted on. And heres why.

    If a Dem did this during a R administration, it would be leading every newscast on every cable station for the next 24 hrs.

  10. 10
    Ruckus says:

    This country is beginning to stink with all these assholes running around for all to see.

  11. 11
    Roger Moore says:

    @Betty Cracker:
    I’ve been using the line for a while; I’m hoping it, or something close, catches on.

  12. 12
    beltane says:

    Scott Brown won’t commit to going to the Republican convention
    http://www.dailykos.com/story/.....RNC-Romney

    But I thought everyone in Mass loved Mitt Romney.

  13. 13
    Studly Pantload, the emotionally unavailable unicorn says:

    @beltane: Claire McCaskill is likely to sit out the Dem convention, too.

    Probably wise moves on both their parts, considering their states’ politics. But, yes, the irony of Brown sitting out the formal nom of Mass’s ex-governor is at least a tad tasty.

  14. 14
    dmsilev says:

    If Rand Paul thinks the American people want a vote on the “Women’s bodies don’t actually belong to them” act of 2012, he should propose it as a stand-alone piece of legislation. If not, then he’s just a posturing jackass.

    OK, even if he does, he’s still just a posturing jackass.

  15. 15
    Craig says:

    @dmsilev: But that’s the point. He knows that they don’t; the amendment is just a poison pill, injected in order to attempt to kill a bill that he wants to kill. Rand Paul isn’t actually making a stand on abortion here, he’s just engaging in freshman-level political dickery.

  16. 16
    Felinious Wench says:

    @dmsilev:

    “Women’s bodies don’t actually belong to them” act of 2012,

    Or better yet, The Handmaid’s Tale and Flood Insurance Fail Act of 2012?

    It’s been a very long day, and I’m only at +1/2

  17. 17
    dmsilev says:

    @Craig:

    Rand Paul isn’t actually making a stand on abortion here, he’s just engaging in freshman-level political dickery.

    So, he’s auditioning to be Romney’s running mate?

  18. 18
    beltane says:

    Rand Paul is doing us all a favor with this. The War on Women Controlling Their Own Reproductive Organs had taken a back seat to the War on Young Americans of Latino Descent and the War on Americans Seeking Health Care. I for one am grateful that Sen. Paul has been kind enough to show us ladies some love.

  19. 19
    scav says:

    “I think the people who believe in protecting life from rapidly rising waters would like to see a vote.”

  20. 20
    dmsilev says:

    @Felinious Wench: That would work.

    I think the Democrats need to pass a law entitled “The ‘1984 and The Handmaiden’s Tale are cautionary works, not instruction manuals’ Act of 2012”. Whose text will read, in its entirety, “See the title, you gibbering loons.”

    In that vein, the fine folks over at Lawyers, Guns & Money inform me that the Texas GOP has published their 2012 platform. Two samples:

    Gestational Contracts – We believe rental of a woman’s womb makes child bearing a mere commodity to the highest bidder and petition the Legislature to rescind House Bill 724 of the 78th Legislature. We support the adoption of human embryos and the banning of human embryo trafficking.

    We support the principles regarding the public economy as stated in the Republican Party Platform of 1932

    Peak Wingnut Is A Lie.

  21. 21
    Odie Hugh Manatee says:

    Maybe Rand is fighting to stem the flood of abortions that wingers say are swamping this country? If one ‘flood’ is as good as another, it would be nice if Rand would concentrate on the flood of money in our economy that is flowing to the top, leaving everyone else high and dry in the desert of what little remains.

    Rand, please think about all of those poor rich people drowning in all that cash and do something to help them!

  22. 22
    GxB says:

    Come on people work with me! This is Wingnut 101! – To Rand, stopping abortion IS flood insurance. Need I remind you heathens about the last time…

  23. 23
  24. 24

    What a tool. Just can’t help sticking his hoof in his mouth, can he?

  25. 25
    Roger Moore says:

    @GxB:

    Need I remind you heathens about the last time…

    You mean the time God said afterward he’d never do the same thing again, and put the rainbow in the sky as a reminder of his promise? That time?

  26. 26
    Felinious Wench says:

    @dmsilev:

    We believe rental of a woman’s womb makes child bearing a mere commodity to the highest bidder and petition the Legislature to rescind House Bill 724 of the 78th Legislature.

    Sigh. This is so awesome. Literally, The Handmaid’s Tale.

    It takes a stomach of steel and lots of anger management therapy to be a female Texas liberal. And tequila. And guns. Texas liberals prefer to keep our guns, just in case we need to use them on Texas Conservatives.

  27. 27

    I just pray these assholes are dumb enough, or have bought into their own shit deeply enough, or both, to keep this fuckery-pokery (jiggery-probery? probery-pokery?) up right until the election.

    They can’t help themselves. They win an election and go nuts. They did it after Bush won in 2004, and they fucked themselves badly going into 2006. They’re doing it again this time after their big, amazing, superlative, historic, histrionic and great win in 2010. I can’t understand how they can be dumb enough to believe that most Americans really want to do away with Social Security, as they tried in 2005, or that most Americans are creepy and obsessed just itching to poke around all women’s bits. (Most of us guys are happy to poke around in specific women’s bits, after all, and only if it’s consensual.)

    Anyway, I hope they keep this up. Go, Senator Rand, go! And all you other assholes, you keep it up too! Great work!

  28. 28
    GxB says:

    @Roger Moore: And there are no contradictions in the Bible? We are talking “Old Testament” here.

  29. 29
    CW in LA says:

    @beltane: Funny, even on progressive outlets news about chickenshit Democrats like McCaskill and Manchin avoiding the president is all over the place. But this the first I’ve heard of Scott Brown keeping his distance from Willard.

  30. 30
    Martin says:

    @GxB: I can’t keep up. Katrina told us that putting gays down was flood insurance. Are tax cuts also flood insurance?

  31. 31
    Roger Moore says:

    @GxB:
    But everything in the Bible is literally true, even the parts where it contradicts itself. I know it’s true because the fundamentalist Christians tell me so.

  32. 32
    GxB says:

    @Martin: No tax cuts insure most Americans get into heaven. Remember it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to get into heaven? Well our betters are assuring us of the salvation of poverty. See, always looking out for our best interest.

    In your defense, this is Wingnut 202 – towards the end, and the prof is usually rushing through the syllabus by then.

  33. 33
    Felinious Wench says:

    @Martin:

    Katrina told us that putting gays down was flood insurance.

    It’s all very simple. After the Great Flood in Genesis, when the entire world was basically destroyed, God promised never to send another flood, and the world was repopulated from Noah and a couple of his kid’s families.

    However, that promise was NOT made to gays or women, only to Noah. So, God can still send floods because of gays or abortion, which is all on women. So, in order to prevent God sending another flood that impacts all of us, we can make sure no women have access to abortion, birth control, etc., and that’s insurance, get it? It’s all very simple.

    I’ve also had a Talibaptist relative tell me that I can’t use medication in labor because God sent labor pains to women because they’re responsible for The Fall. It’s our punishment.

    Conservative Christians blame women for EVERYTHING. So, why not throw floods in too?

  34. 34
    GxB says:

    @Roger Moore: As the great Theologian, one Rev. Timothy Lovejoy put it: “have you ever sat down and read this thing? Technically we’re not allowed to go to the bathroom.”

  35. 35
    Davis X. Machina says:

    @CW in LA: Covering Republicans in Massachusetts is like covering yetis — first you have to find one….

  36. 36
    russ says:

    @Felinious Wench:

    Look at me
    Look at me
    Look at me

    signed Rand Paul “I am very conservative”

    see me working for you folks, now send money to help me fight the good fight.

  37. 37
    Craig says:

    @dmsilev: God, don’t even tease me. Only in my dreams.

  38. 38
    Raven says:

    “Gov. Jan Brewer went on the radio after the SB 1070 ruling and told KFYI host Mike Broomhead that President Obama’s immigration policies are designed to improve his reelection chances by getting him the votes of illegal immigrants.

    Not Latino citizens.

    The governor of Arizona says that the president of the United States is encouraging people to cross the border and vote for him.”

  39. 39
    beltane says:

    @Raven: In Jan Brewer’s twisted little mind there are no Latino citizens, only aliens who are, by her definition, illegal.

  40. 40
    Maude says:

    @Raven:
    So that’s why we need voter ID. Gotta catch those illegals before they get into the voting booth.
    She is …

  41. 41
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    @dmsilev:

    OK, even if he does, he’s still just a posturing jackass.

    He cannot escape what he essentially is.

  42. 42
    Patricia Kayden says:

    I don’t understand the attraction to Ron Paul. Like him, his son is a fool. Good for Reid for standing firm.

  43. 43
    j says:

    In other words, he’s a DOUCHE!

  44. 44
    WereBear says:

    @Felinious Wench:
    I’ve also had a Talibaptist relative tell me that I can’t use medication in labor because God sent labor pains to women because they’re responsible for The Fall. It’s our punishment.

    Let me guess. It was someone with a Y chromosome.

  45. 45
    sharl says:

    Luv ya, ABL, but you should never link to Politico when Wonkette is there 4U:

    The Senate is trying to pass a flood insurance bill, and all Rand Paul wants to do is improve the quality of flood insurance that Americans nationwide will enjoy in the years ahead. Specifically, he wants to add a lil’ Life at Conception Act, which would “ensure equal protection for right to life of each born and preborn human person.” Why won’t Harry Reid bring this amendment to a vote on a flood insurance bill?
    __
    Rand Paul has spent his early summer offering all sorts of practical amendments, like one for the farm bill that would cut off aid to Pakistan. That was germane enough, but this one, to attach life-begins-at-conception language to a flood insurance bill, is hella germane like the dickens. And yet pro-life Mormon Harry Reid won’t allow this, because he loves abortion:
    __
    “I’m told last night that one of our Republican senators wants to offer an amendment — listen to this one — wants to offer an amendment on when life begins,” Reid said. “There will not be a vote on that on flood insurance. We’ll either do flood insurance with amendments that deal with flood insurance, or we won’t do it, we’ll have an extension.
    __
    “I don’t understand what this is all about,” Reid added. “But I want everyone to know: This flood insurance is extremely important. The big pushers of this bill are Republicans senators, veteran Republican senators.
    __
    “They better work on their side of the aisle, because I am not going to put up with that,” he concluded. “If the Republicans won’t stand up to that, to the person who’s going to that, I’m not going to.”
    __
    Stand your ground, Rand Paul!

    ETA: Everything after the first line should be blockquoted.

  46. 46
    celticdragonchick says:

    The head stomping incident is one of the outstanding reasons liberals should think of when deciding whther to bring some sort of self protection weapon to a rally, be that pepper spray, a tazer-like device or even a gun. The moment he started stomping on her neck and head, the incident went from battery into actual deadly force. It is simple luck that she is not a quadriplegic or dead at this point. Had I been there, I would have zero moral problem with putting three rounds dead center mass on that jackass. He was literally killing her.

    The wingnut blogs were full of people wishing he had, in fact, paralyzed her or killed her.

  47. 47
  48. 48
    WereBear says:

    @Raven: She’s just standing her ground.

  49. 49
    celticdragonchick says:

    @Raven:

    Nothing easy here about it. It is something to consider when you are going to a location where people who do not like you may take violent action if you open your mouth. You need to consider beforehand exactly how you intend to deal with the situation, starting with how to get away if possible, and then what to do if fleeing is not an option. Pepper spray may be a good investment.

    The folks on the other side are literally bring assault rifles to rallies. We would be stupid to assume that the guns will not be used at some point. Hopefully it will not happen…but I am not assuming that by any means.

  50. 50
    PurpleGirl says:

    @Raven: So, anyone can just walk into any polling place in AZ and vote — no one checks a name on a list of voters at a minimum? You just go in and go up to a machine and vote? Really?!

    Even in NYS, they have people at desks with voter lists (which have a exemplar of your signature) and you have tell them your name and you have to sign the list. They check you off as voting on a second list. Gosh….

  51. 51
    PurpleGirl says:

    @sharl:

    each born and preborn human person

    but, but what about corporate persons… don’t they count?

    /snark

  52. 52
    Roger Moore says:

    @GxB:
    I actually have sat down and read the Bible, cover to cover, even the really boring parts like the begats and the dedication of the tabernacle where each tribe offers exactly, word for word the same sacrifice. And yes, anyone who has read the whole thing and believes it’s 100% literal truth needs to be committed.

  53. 53
    WereBear says:

    @Roger Moore: That is what helped my exit from the Baptists. It was so obviously a conglomeration of history, myth, stories, and random literature.

  54. 54
    Felonious Wench says:

    @WereBear:

    Let me guess. It was someone with a Y chromosome.

    Believe it or not, no. Female under the restrictive thumb of a dominant husband, whom she obeys without question. But this all came from their branch of Christianity, Southern Baptist.

  55. 55
    Felonious Wench says:

    @WereBear:

    It was so obviously a conglomeration of history, myth, stories, and random literature.

    Like the Bible? :)

    At least Episcopalians say this openly, and actually study the damn thing as a book, not a divine relic.

  56. 56
    Joseph Nobles says:

    @Felinious Wench: You did tell the Talibangelist to get his ass out off the air conditioning and go pick some fucking peas out in the field? Because the Good Lord was pretty damn cclear about that one, too.

  57. 57
    Splitting Image says:

    @Roger Moore:

    You mean the time God said afterward he’d never do the same thing again, and put the rainbow in the sky as a reminder of his promise? That time?

    The funny thing about the rainbow is that in the Akkadian version of the flood myth (Atra-Hasis), one of the ways the gods settle on to help control the human population instead of flooding the world was making some humans gay so they wouldn’t want to have children.

  58. 58
    Quarks says:

    I particularly like the timing of this — adding abortion issues to a flood insurance bill just as some very, very red counties in Florida are under major flooding thanks to Tropical Storm Debby.

  59. 59
    Quarks says:

    I particularly like the timing of this — adding abortion issues to a flood insurance bill just as some very, very red counties in Florida are under major flooding thanks to Tropical Storm Debby.

  60. 60
    Ruckus says:

    @Roger Moore:
    I read the whole thing when I was 11 or 12. At that age I wasn’t sure if the word bullshit was appropriate. I learned at about 13 that I was correct. Bullshit it was and still is.

  61. 61
    Sophist(from droid) says:

    Speaker: Then it is unanimous, we are going to approve the bill to evacuate the town of Springfield in the great state of —

    Congressman: Wait a minute, I want to tack on a rider to that bill: $30 million of taxpayer money to support the perverted arts.
    Speaker: All in favor of the amended Springfield-slash-pervert bill? [everyone boos]
    Speaker: Bill defeated. [bangs gavel]

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