Tuesday Evening Open Thread: Another DREAM Deferred

(Nick Anderson via GoComics.com)
Until Mr. Pierce reminded us, I had forgotten that, despite the perceived crushing of his vice-presidentail hopes, Marco Rubio still has a book to sell. But is he bitter?

Marco Rubio: Anyone who doesn’t agree with the left’s approach to immigration oftentimes gets stigmatized as anti-immigrant or anti-Hispanic. And so I think that finding a solution that balances these two sides is very difficult. It’s not easy. You can’t just do that with a magic wave of the wand.

Charles P.Pierce: There’s nobody that I can see on the left that’s quite as — I won’t even use “dogmatic” — quite as harsh as, say, Steve King.

MR: Well I would say that’s not as — well, for example, I’ve been called anti-immigrant.

CPP: By whom?

MR: People on the left say that —

CPP: Who on the left has called you anti-immigrant? That would be enormously silly, it would seem to me.

MR: The chairman of Univision [Randy Falco] called me anti-immigrant — he’s a huge Democratic donor. I’d be more than happy to provide you with a detailed accounting of some of the most outrageous things that have been said about me, and you’ll have those today, but my point is that neither side is blameless in the rhetoric of this issue. And by the same token, it’s not just the rhetoric, it’s this view — that somehow this is a very easy, black-and-white issue that there is an obvious solution to — that is not accurate. Both sides are making that argument.

That would be an affirmative, Houston.

Apart from dashing the fondest hopes of hard-blathering Repubs, what’s on the agenda for the evening?

111 replies
  1. 1
    lamh35 says:

    what’s all this news saying Rubio ain’t being vetted, R-Money himself says that’s not true, it’s all bullpuckey.

    Romney Camp Vetting Marco Rubio After All

  2. 2
    AnotherBruce says:

    The Chairman of Univision, Mr. Randy Falco is a bitter communist who requires all of his employees to remember and quote the Communist manifesto. I can see Mr. Rubio’s point. Damn corporate leftists!

  3. 3
    Steve M. says:

    Both sides do it!

  4. 4
    lamh35 says:

    so since Issa can’t get Obama directly, he’s going after Holder. Besides political lynching and partisan politics, what exactly does a “contempt” vote if passed mean for Holder?

    Fast And Furious: Issa Says Holder Contempt Vote Still On

  5. 5
    Ash says:

    Who is this journalist that dared push back against a politician and call him on his BS? GET THEE A PULITZER!!!!

  6. 6
    trollhattan says:


    Pretty rich, having a gazillionaire probable felon trying to intimidate the USAG. Issa needs to surf more, preferably in the Red Triangle. Tool.

  7. 7
    Amir Khalid says:

    As I recall, Issa’s been threatening the AG for quite some time now. If Issa actually has something on AG Holder, why hasn’t he actually begun the contempt proceedings?

  8. 8
    David Koch says:

    Who on the left has called you anti-immigrant? That would be enormously silly, it would seem to me.

    Why would that be silly, Rubio is anti immigrant. He’s for deportation, he for ripping families apart, he’s against the DREAM Act, he’s against comprehensive immigration reform. He’s to the far right of Ronald Reagan. What would you call that but anti immigrant.

  9. 9
    Linda Featheringill says:

    Is Mr. Rubio trying to tell us that he is a champion of the poor Puerto Rican, the poor Mexican, the poor Guatamalan, or even the poor and mixed-race Cuban? [apologies to those I left out]

    Is he the champion of anyone who puts food on the table by getting their backs tired and their hands dirty?

    I don’t think so.

  10. 10
    lamh35 says:

    @Amir Khalid: the contempt vote is scheduled for tomorrow I believe.

  11. 11
    MobiusKlein says:

    I still fail to understand why Rubio can’t push his mini dream act now. Is a bill so fragile that the president can rend it with one EO?

  12. 12
    gex says:

    I see that random civilians are JUST.LIKE. elected members of Congress that represent a specific political party. Good to know. Both sides do it!

  13. 13
    PeakVT says:

    The chairman of Univision [Randy Falco] called me anti-immigrant — he’s a huge Democratic donor

    I found one entry for “FALCO, RANDEL” at Open Secrets from 2008 to 2012 … to a PAC.

    I (tentatively) call bullshit.

  14. 14
    lamh35 says:

    @lamh35: personally, I think the original report was correct Rubio ain’t being vetting in any real way. Romney’s just trying to save face because the campaign staff all but confirmed that Rubio isn’t being vetted and that pissed Rubio supporters off.

    What’s sad is that this sure doesn’t make Rubio look any better. It’s like having his mommy call in to school to say her son deserves to be on the dean’s list

  15. 15

    Well, if the Romney campaign is vetting Mr. Rubio, it won’t be his squishy stance on immigration that throws him out of the running. All they have to do is check out his years in the Florida legislature and his questionable — even for Florida — expense reports and dealings. Squeaky-clean he ain’t.

    Also, no one outside of Calle Ocho is going to buy him as the Hispanic savior of the GOP. For one thing, a lot of Cubans don’t consider themselves Hispanic, a term they associate with lower-class people (i.e. Mexicans, Puerto Ricans, and anyone else who didn’t get out of Havana with their jewels stuffed in their panties). And therefore the Hispanic voters in Texas, New Mexico, Colorado, Arizona, and California don’t see him as one of them either. The GOP establishment thinks anyone who has a vowel at the end of their name and can roll their rr’s is El Jefe. Pero es una tonteria tremenda.

  16. 16
    David Koch says:

    (photo) What if Newt gave a book signing and nobody came:


  17. 17
    David Koch says:

    (photo) Mitty thinks Chicken Soup is exotic German food:


  18. 18
    David Koch says:

    (photo) Another Mitty photo fuck up — posing as Thurston Howell III


  19. 19
    Redshift says:

    Anyone who doesn’t agree with the left’s approach to immigration oftentimes gets stigmatized as anti-immigrant or anti-Hispanic.

    Hey, Marco! Even if it were true that you’ve been called anti-immigrant by “the left,” that doesn’t mean it’s because of a simple disagreement, nor does it mean that happens to “anyone.”

    Typical conservative victimhood. “I’m being criticized, so it must be unfair, and they must be doing it to everyone, because everyone is just like me, right?”

  20. 20
    Redshift says:


    Besides political lynching and partisan politics, what exactly does a “contempt” vote if passed mean for Holder?

    Nothing. TPM covered this a couple of weeks ago, and IIRC unless Issa actually wants to grandstand enough to send the sergeant-at-arms to arrest Holder and lock him in a House conference room somewhere, all this would mean is that wingnuts, instead of saying “we want you to resign for no good reason” would be saying “we officially want you to resign for no good reason.”

  21. 21
    lamh35 says:

    @Redshift: I thought as much, but I wasn’t sure.

    Is there anyway this will blow up in Issa’s face?

  22. 22
    foggy follansbye says:

    @David Koch: Hilarious. Especially with the head at the top of the fold.

    I wonder if he has a nautical-themed pashmina afghan?

  23. 23
    Enhanced Voting Techniques says:

    So why doesn’t Rubio put is money were his mouth is if he is serious about immigration reform? The left has signaled it wants to play ball, Rubio had been certified 110% liberal free, it’s an election year, time to do it.

    Unless of course it’s all just grandstanding from him.

  24. 24
    trollhattan says:

    Feel the FraudMentum!

    Rep. Dan Lungren has come to the defense of a Sacramento County Republican Party voter registration drive he supported but has come under fire for filing potentially fraudulent registration cards.
    Lungren said he understood that there were sufficient safeguards in place to prevent fraud. “The overall registration effort made by the party was very successful. I am unaware of any single registration that was paid for by that program that had any problems,” he said last week, adding that it’s possible that the voters filling out the forms made mistakes.
    Sacramento County election officials forwarded information about the registration effort to the Secretary of State last month after finding irregularities with the voter registration cards submitted by circulators working for Momentum Political Services, a firm hired by the Sacramento County Republican Party.
    Lungren said it was his understanding that cards collected by the drive had to go through multiple validity checks before a payment to the vendor would be made, though he said he had to distance himself from the operation because of campaign finance laws.
    Elk Grove Democrat Ami Bera, who is challenging Lungren in November, has called for an investigation into the drive, writing in a letter to the Secretary of State that reports showed “3000 voter registration cards contained false or illegally changed information to inflate the amount of registered Republican voters in the newly drawn seventh Congressional District.”


  25. 25
    cat48 says:

    Love this cartoon. It catches Obama’s dry humor.

  26. 26
    Just Some Fuckhead says:


    I still fail to understand why Rubio can’t push his mini dream act now. Is a bill so fragile that the president can rend it with one EO?

    The President got socialist cooties all over immigration. Republicans can’t touch it now.

  27. 27
    Davis X. Machina says:

    They can’t very well make Rubio ambassador to Beijing, now can they?

    You can only do that trick once.

  28. 28
    jeffreyw says:

    The cherry tomatoes from the container garden are ripe. Pizza yesterday, sauteed for pasta sauce today.

  29. 29
  30. 30
    Baud says:

    @Davis X. Machina:

    I wonder if Huntsman feels like the world’s biggest dope.

  31. 31
  32. 32
    Baud says:

    @PeakVT: I could say the same thing about myself.

  33. 33
    amk says:


    Mitt email to Rubio :: “Here are the vetting forms. No rush.”

  34. 34
    Yutsano says:

    @PeakVT: Is this some weird trend among world leaders Cheney started?

    @Valdivia: I was thinking Guatemala. That could be fun.

    PS: What you have done there has been seen. :P

  35. 35
  36. 36
    Linda Featheringill says:

    BTW, Happy Juneteenth!

    [sneaks up on me every year]

  37. 37
    Davis X. Machina says:

    @Valdivia: A few minor technical hitches stand in the way, but sure…

  38. 38
  39. 39
    Comrade Mary says:

    @PeakVT: Now I’m getting SNL flashbacks.

  40. 40
    gogol's wife says:

    There’s an interesting article on Netanyahu by David Margolick in Vanity Fair. I had no idea the extent to which Sheldon Adelson is involved in Israel, starting a newspaper just for Netanyahu, etc. The whole thing is very ominous with respect to our election.

  41. 41
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @PeakVT: Me too.

    @Valdivia: Think he would take it?

  42. 42
    Commenting at Ballon Juice since 1937 says:

    Rubio’s plan is ‘your corpse can be buried in America if you sign up as cannon fodder for our next grand adventure’. Calling him anti-immigrant is too narrow. The beast is anti people especially non-anchor babies like himself. He’s a sociopathic narcissist like the rest of his party.

  43. 43
    MikeJ says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: If he didn’t take it you’d see clips of Huntsman saying, “When the president asks you to serve your country, you go.” Which would be hilarious.

  44. 44
    lamh35 says:

    I’m confused. Is rubio getting a real vet or a courtesy vet?

    Roger Simon @politicoroger
    Pity vet? RT @ktumulty I’m confused. Is rubio getting a real vet or a courtesy vet?

  45. 45
    Yutsano says:

    @lamh35: Or a sympathy vet.

  46. 46


    You see this is where the Obama campaign absolutely shines. In 2008 when the campaign was working out of my office the most common mistake on voter registrations was people putting “USA” in the box for “county” (they misread it as Country). There was always a phone number, and they would follow up with the voter and get them to amend and initial the registration. I do not know of any registrations that were bounced back by the Elections Board. The Obama campaign were THAT thorough.

    I have to say that both in the primary (although I did not like the Obama operative, he was a former student of Obama at Chicago University and a little bit creepy) and in the General (Jason my tame Obama operative for the general was BRILLIANT!) the Obama get out the vote organization was second to none.

  47. 47
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @lamh35: I say courtesy.

  48. 48
    MikeJ says:

    @lamh35: What do you think?

    “So why not include him on a short list? Perhaps the answer lies in Stuart Stevens, the Romney campaign’s epically interesting chief strategist. Stevens is a Mississippi maverick — a sometime author, libertine and extreme athlete. Most relevant to this instance, he also served as strategist for former Florida Gov. Charlie Crist, who Rubio trounced in a hotly contested 2010 election. Bad blood between warring camps doesn’t just fade away overnight, and in some cases it grows more malignant with time.”


  49. 49
    MikeJ says:

    @MikeJ: And to reply to myself, I’ll add, it;’s not courtesy or sympathy that makes MItt claim to be considering Rubio. When the story broke that they weren’t considering Rubio after Obama’s immigration coup, it made Mitt look incredibly weak. He can’t stand up to Obama. So they have to pretend to consider him.

  50. 50
    lamh35 says:

    @MikeJ: oh, I’m pretty sure the Crist folks know where all the Rubio skeletons are buried and have already informed R-Money that it’s a no on Rubio. But by letting the cat out of the bag early and with no pushback until later in the day, the R-Money millionaires pissed off some big Rubio supporters

  51. 51
    some guy says:

    @Linda Featheringill:

    and to you, too. a grand and glorious day, in Galveston and elsewhere throughout the Republic.

  52. 52
    Yutsano says:


    but does he have the cojones to say this on FauxNews?

    Signs point to no.

  53. 53
    lamh35 says:

    So POTUS has presser at G20 summit and some idjit US reporter of course ask a Romney question something about the advisor who penned that op-ed in that foreign magazine. POTUS response:

    PBO: We have 1 President at a time. Traditionally, America’s polit diff end at water’s edge.
    With respect to Mr. Romney’s advisers, I suggest you go talk to Mr. Romney about his advisers

  54. 54
    Gex says:

    @Yutsano: Listen. Who hasn’t just randomly vetted a VP candidate? You always have at least one or two CYA vettings…

  55. 55
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Gex: I vetted two over the weekend. Wait, that’s not a euphemism?

  56. 56
    Gex says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: It is if you’re doing it right.

  57. 57
    Yutsano says:

    @Gex: I’ve done my share of vetting in my lifetime! I’m not a vet virgin.

    @Omnes Omnibus: I blame Karen Tumulty and Roger Simon. You know, the MSM.

  58. 58
    MikeJ says:

    I woulds like to announce my intention to vet Vanessa Paradis now that she is free.

  59. 59
    Omnes Omnibus says:


    I blame Karen Tumulty and Roger Simon.

    Aren’t you supposed to blame Obama or is this the wrong thread? The heat befuddles me at times.

    @MikeJ: You bastard!

  60. 60
    Yutsano says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: Every thing is always and forever Obummer’s fault.

  61. 61
    rikyrah says:

    I’m gonna say this again: Marco Rubio is nothing but a grifter, who thinks he’s a better grifter than he is. Rubio’s fake DREAM ACT was nothing but a damn fake. THERE WAS NO BILL that he was going to introduce. It was nothing but bullshyt to:

    1. make him look more respectable in the eyes of the Latino community so that he could pimp that respect to the GOP
    2. give Willard ‘cover’, so that he could try and erase all that racist ass bullshyt he said about immigration during the primary season.

    that is it.

    HOW do I know it was nothing but a fake?

    a) where is ONE DEMOCRAT coming forward saying ‘ yeah, I was wworking with Rubio on his DREAM ACT PROPOSAL.’ as far as I can tell, NOBODY HAS SHOWED UP saying this.
    b) WHY wouldn’t he push his DREAM ACT bill NOW? I’ve said it before, what the President is only valid up until January 20, 2013. If Willard is elected, it could end at 12:01 pm THAT DAY. SO, why not submit it to become LAW OF THE LAND?

    Because, that would mean that Rubio’s ass would actually have to get GOP votes……and, there are NO GOP VOTES FOR THIS.

    Rubio was more honest, when his ass said that the DREAM ACT and /immigration ‘ didn’t involve him’, which is why it wasn’t even a section on his WEBSITE even a month ago.

    This was all a smokescreen, and the President took that smokescreen and blew it all the way up, exposing the frauds and forcing them to either support what he did, or piss off Latinos even more.

    Rubio is a scam artist, who just ran out of his scam. Now, he’ll actually have to do some work in order to gain some respect in the general Latino community, and if he can’t offer Willard cover with Latinos, he has nothing Willard wants.

  62. 62
    Yutsano says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: FYWP.

    You speak better French. You have better odds here.

  63. 63
    Soonergrunt says:

    @lamh35: Well, since the US Marshals work for Holder, and the Sergeant at Arms of the House of Representatives has no arrest power (certainly none off the grounds of the Capitol building at any rate) and the US District Court will not interject itself into a political dispute, I’d say that Issa has a nice steaming cup of fuck-all.

  64. 64
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Yutsano: Woohoo!*

    *Said with full knowledge of what better odds really means in this context.

  65. 65

    My truly independent DH just watched a Romney ad on TV (in NC) and his response was “you haven’t given a single idea that would fix the problem asshole” That was completely unsolicited by me. Methinks my DH is paying more attention than I thought he was.

  66. 66
    Mnemosyne says:


    Wait, Johnny Depp is on the market again AND YOU DIDN’T TELL ME IMMEDIATELY?!

    Eff you. Forever.

  67. 67
    MikeJ says:

    @Yutsano: I know how bad my french is (most french people instantly interrupt me with, “no please, for the love of god, speak English”) but you don’t know that. I do manage to get through transactions and have taught Parisian bartenders to make American martinis.

  68. 68
    Mnemosyne says:


    Is there anyway this will blow up in Issa’s face?

    He’s Darrell Issa, the man who orchestrated the Democratic governor’s recall in California, only to see Ah-nold swoop in and steal the election from him.

    It’s guaranteed to blow up in his face, though that doesn’t automatically mean that Holder won’t be harmed. He’s a schlemiel to end all schlemiels.

  69. 69
    Yutsano says:


    Eff you. Forever.

    I know you don’t mean this. But FWIW it was just announced today.

  70. 70
    ruemara says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: Both wrong. Mercy.

  71. 71
    Violet says:

    It was only made official today. They’ve been separated for months.

  72. 72
    jl says:

    Not sure what Lil’ Newtie is talking about here, but his political tactical genius advice for Romney, Roowwrrrlll!:

    Newt Gingrich’s advice for Mitt Romney: Sharpen your animal instincts


  73. 73
    Anne Laurie says:


    Stuart Stevens, the Romney campaign’s epically interesting chief strategist

    I’m such a partisan, I first read this as ethically interesting”. And thought, wow, there’s a new CYA euphemism for ‘maybe not dishonest by a legal definition, but as trustworthy as a street dog left to guard a freshly-cooked steak’.

  74. 74

    Marco doesn’t seem to realize that it doesn’t matter what mean thing the _Democrats_ said about him. His Veep hopes are crushed because of the attitudes of his fellow _Republicans_.

    Do they all have Stockholm syndrome like this?

  75. 75
    Baud says:


    Sharpen your animal instincts

    Not good advice. Romney’s animal is Scrooge McDuck.

  76. 76
    Violet says:

    It’s not a courtesy vet or a sympathy vet or a pity vet. It’s a cowardly vet. As per usual, Romney is a coward, afraid not to vet Rubio after the leaks.

  77. 77
    some guy says:

    internicene Florida GOP bullshit is certain to give FL to Obama. again.

    crocodile tears for the neofascist great Cuban/White hope.

  78. 78
    amk says:

    @jl: Talk about dog whistles.

  79. 79
    David in NY says:

    “anti-immigrant” is harsh? That’s just a question of fact, true or false, and a lot of people would think it’s positive. It’s not as rude or wrong as calling the President a Kenyan-socialist-muslim, for example, which influential right-wingers do all the time.

    Thin skins these Republicans.

  80. 80
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @David in NY: So it is with most bullies.

  81. 81
    Mnemosyne says:


    I do mean it. But I probably couldn’t date Johnny for long — he smokes like a chimney and I’m allergic. But it would be fun while it lasted.

  82. 82
    Chris says:

    @Just Some Fuckhead:
    “You should’ve changed his blood out for acid after this part..the sharks wont touch him now”
    /Dr. Girlfriend

  83. 83
    Yutsano says:

    @Mnemosyne: You could just fuck his brains out for a week or two then calmly announce it will never work out. Not Hollywood enough?

  84. 84
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Yutsano: Isn’t this supposed to be a family blog?

  85. 85
    jl says:

    @amk: You mean dog whistle or horndawg whistle?

  86. 86
    MikeJ says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: This blog concentrates more on the mechanics of making families.

  87. 87

    Since this is an open thread… There’s something I’ve been wondering about. I don’t go to freaky-ass right-wing sites like Free Republic or anything like that, but I do sometimes (unwisely) look at the reader comments on news sites. And something that’s kind of befuddled me for a long, long time is this fairly small, but always steady stream of comments on almost any thread having to do with Obama that he’s gay. Has anybody else picked up on that? Does anybody know what’s behind it? There’s talk about Obama “blowing” guys or how he’s the “pervert in chief” I’ve actually seen this. And this kind of shit goes back to 2008 when some weirdo check-forger got up in a press conference to tell the world he’d had sex with Obama. What the hell kind of shit is this?

    It’s like some kind of weird underground thing; I don’t get it. I could just chalk it up to how soooooo many conservatives are just fat, weepy losers living in their mother’s cellars, eating cheetos all day, and they’re jealous of him having a wife or something, but it seems like there’s more to it than that, something deeper and more disturbed, like all these assholes who write and say this stuff are pedophiles or wife-beaters or some shit, and they think that if they can point to Obama as being some kind of deviant, then that means they aren’t. Although at this point, I feel sure that I’m overthinking this.

    But, all the same, what the hell is going on with this? Does anybody else have a clue here?

  88. 88
    Yutsano says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: @MikeJ: It’s a legitimate English word. Plus I fully believe that swearing is more honest. If JC wants to delete ot he can, no skin off my nose.

  89. 89
    Baud says:

    @Yutsano: I kind of like the idea of having a Balloon Juice After Hours thread. Might be difficult to coordinate with all the time zones, however.

  90. 90
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Baud: How would such a thing be different than a normal thread?

  91. 91
    Baud says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: More love, less war.

  92. 92
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Baud: Hippie.

  93. 93
    Another Halocene Human says:

    @David Koch: Way to bury the lede, David! That image is notable for the way the front page editor helpfully juxtaposed his fatal boat crash story with Mitt and Ann smirking… onna boat!

  94. 94
    Comrade Mary says:

    @Baud: After Hours was a movie starring some guy whose first name is the same as John’s middle name. Could work.

  95. 95
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Comrade Mary: Cole’s middle name is Griffin?

    ETA: Or is it Rosanna?

  96. 96
    Valdivia says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    I actually think he wouldn’t after the Huntsman thing. But it would be delicious just to imagine if Castro falls Obama in one fell swoop kills the Cuban obsession by naming a Republican Cuban as ambassador. Too funny.

  97. 97
    lacp says:

    Rubio seems to have enough political smarts to stay vewwy, vewwy qwiet from now until 2016, whether in connection with immigration, veep spot, or anything else. He knows that being assimilated into the Romborg is a one-way ticket to palookaville, if I may use a Star-Trek-on-the-Waterfront reference.

  98. 98
    Ben Cisco says:

    Today has been a good day.

    Doc says I have a herniated disc that has almost healed ON ITS OWN. Another month or so of light duty just to make sure, and a spinal specialist lined up in case things go sideways, but so far no pain (sans meds) for the last 48 hours for the first time in over two months. Praise be to the Prophets!

  99. 99
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Valdivia: Hey, I attempted to reply to your note today, but it bounced back. I am glad you enjoyed the article. Thanks for the kind words.

  100. 100
    Valdivia says:

    @Ben Cisco:

    woo hoo. good for you. sometimes our bodies do heal themselves

  101. 101
    Comrade Mary says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: Yep, Griffin, like the dog. Or mythical beast.

  102. 102
    Cacti says:

    Rubio’s 15 minutes of fame are up. Obama stole that pony’s one trick. No chance that he’s the token brown face on the white party ticket now.

    Even if he was, Florida Cubans have always been the special snowflakes of the hispanic immigrant population. They’ve never been simpatico with the Mexican-American community.

  103. 103
    Valdivia says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    bizarre. flickr I guess. sent an alternate address.

  104. 104
    Ash Can says:


    Newt Gingrich’s advice for Mitt Romney: Sharpen your animal instincts

    Scene: Spacious garage at large house in California. Campaign manager is seated at computer; Romneybot2012 is standing smiling and motionless in background. Campaign manager sees headline on computer screen, frowns.

    Campaign manager: “Animal instincts…animal instincts? Shitfuck. Which animal?? (Types furiously.) Goddamn…cow, deer, moose, dog, cat…pig, elephant…centipede. Centipede!” (Shakes head.) “No. Insect, not animal. Let’s see…goat, hedgehog…” (Stares at image on screen, begins to smile.)

    Cut to scene of Romneybot2012’s next campaign speech. Romneybot2012 walks stiffly out onto stage in front of throngs of dozens, lamb tucked under arm and wearing frilly Little Bo Peep dress.

  105. 105
    Thoughtcrime says:


    Newt Gingrich’s advice for Mitt Romney: Sharpen your animal instincts

    Manimal? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manimal

    “…a shape-shifting man who possessed the ability to turn himself into any animal he chose.”

  106. 106
    Mnemosyne says:


    I said in another thread that if Romney’s strategy is to attack Obama at every turn on every little thing, by October he’s going to look like a Pomeranian clinging to Obama’s pant cuff.

    I’m a little frightened that Newt and I think the same thing.

  107. 107
    Another Halocene Human says:

    @Horrendo Slapp (formerly Jimperson Zibb, Duncan Dönitz, Otto Graf von Pfmidtnöchtler-Pízsmőgy, Mumphrey, et al.): I always figured it was projection because Obama couldn’t be that squeaky clean, especially considering he’s blah, I mean, even Cosby had a child out of wedlock, it must be because he has no interest in women conspiracy-theory thinking.

    Of course, the only possible answer to that is, have you met Michelle?

  108. 108
    Another Halocene Human says:

    @lacp: What are you talking about? Rubio was born and raised in Palookaville. Do you think he could actually win a fight that wasn’t rigged? No–wait–pull my OTHER finger.

  109. 109
    Another Halocene Human says:


    Even if he was, Florida Cubans have always been the special snowflakes of the hispanic immigrant population. They’ve never been simpatico with the Mexican-American community.

    Can’t resist beating this dead horse one more time. Rubio is the wrong kind of Florida Cuban. Possibly more like the kind who paid a teenager to read to them from Marxist newspapers in the cigar factories of Ybor City.

  110. 110

    @Horrendo Slapp (formerly Jimperson Zibb, Duncan Dönitz, Otto Graf von Pfmidtnöchtler-Pízsmőgy, Mumphrey, et al.):

    I think it’s simpler than that. It just makes them giggle at making that sort of inside joke, like our “two wetsuits and a dildo” line (‘cept we actually did find a guy with two wetsuits and a dildo, but whatevs) and it’s bonding with whoever picks up on it. That and they just throw out random shit and hope it’ll stick and come up with justifications later.

    I mean really, in these peoples minds he’s a gay muslim atheist socialist fascist and they literally feel no discomfort at the cognitive dissonance that causes. I gave up on looking for intellectual honesty anywhere on the right online long ago, let alone churning cesspools of inchoate frothing screaming rage and hatred like FreeRepublic.

    Incidentally are you related to Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern- schplenden- schlitter- crasscrenbon- fried- digger- dingle- dangle- dongle- dungle- burstein- von- knacker- thrasher- apple- banger- horowitz- ticolensic- grander- knotty- spelltinkle- grandlich- grumblemeyer- spelterwasser- kurstlich- himbleeisen- bahnwagen- gutenabend- bitte- ein- nürnburger- bratwustle- gerspurten- mitz- weimache- luber- hundsfut- gumberaber- shönedanker- kalbsfleisch- mittler- aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm?

  111. 111
    dj spellchecka says:


    I found one entry for “FALCO, RANDEL” at Open Secrets from 2008 to 2012 … to a PAC.

    quite right and it was $500 to the “National Cable & Telecommunications Assn.”

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