“The Greatest Book Tour of All Time” — NOT

(h/t Stranger commentor Rob!)

Wonkette‘s Josh Fruhlinger breaks the news to the blogsphere of “George W. Bush’s Alternate History Sci-Fi Book Where He Knows How To Run A Country“:

George W. Bush has, for the most part, had the good grace to go away. Cheney’s only being kept alive by elaborate machinery, and yet he still demands to be wheeled out now and again so he can sneer ominously about something, but George W. Bush, he’s mostly been hanging out on the couch of his exurban McMansion, catching up on all the shows he Tivo’d during his presidency. Well, not really, because he watched TV six hours a night when he was president and probably doesn’t know how to operate a Tivo, but the important part is that he wasn’t all up in our grill, reminding us why we hate him. That winning streak ends today with the announcement that “he’s” working on a new book (or maybe he’s “working” on a new book?) about how to encourage economic growth, which HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, hold on a minute, we just have to HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA, ok let’s nope HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

We are actually kind of angry at the New York Times for only spending a single sentence on the most hilarious bit of political comedy to come down the pike in years…

Paul Constant thinks positive:

This is a great gift that Bush is giving Democrats. Before the 2012 election, in which the Romney campaign is planning to run on a number of economic policies from the Bush administration, George W. Bush is going to give the world an opportunity to remember that he’s the one who tanked our economy. I hope he goes on a huge tour, visits every talk show imaginable, and otherwise does everything possible to ensure his name is everywhere this summer.

I don’t think that’s gonna happen. The NYTImes story seems to indicate Bush is being shoved out on the semi-public “thought leader” circuit — possibly against his personal inclination — to gin up support for the next American Big Swinging Stick adventure in the Middle East:

… At an event less than two blocks from the White House, Mr. Bush gathered former aides and human rights leaders to unveil the “Freedom Collection” sponsored by his public policy institute, an assemblage of interviews with dissidents who took on autocratic regimes. Along the way, Mr. Bush used the occasion to endorse Mitt Romney for president and to nudge both political parties to do more to support revolutionaries and build democratic institutions around the world…

He singled out Syria, where the government of President Bashar al-Assad has killed thousands to squelch opposition. “All of us here today join you in hoping and praying for the end of violence and the advance of freedom in Syria,” Mr. Bush told Ammar Abdulhamid, a prominent Syrian opposition figure invited to speak at the event…

“He is very concerned about what he likes to call isolationism,” said a former Bush administration official, who asked not to be identified presuming to speak for Mr. Bush. “If there is a nudge involved, it is completely bipartisan. Hardly anyone is doing enough to support dissidents and freedom advocates these days.”…

This is pretty weak sauce, considering the full-throated enthusiasm with which the Very Serious People at the NYTimes usually greet any suggestion that it’s time for America to roll out some more freedom advocation and dissident support… preferably on tank treads, or from the decks of our awesome expensive aircraft carriers. Rust and the neocons never sleep, but I’m having trouble imagining that even Fox News is going to spend much time this summer reminding us how hard the Republicans have worked to elide all public memory of the Oval Office occupant between Bill “Filthy Horndog” Clinton and Barack “Secret Muslim” Obama.

16 replies
  1. 1
    g says:

    interviews with dissidents who took on autocratic regimes.

    So I guess Cindy Sheehan will finally get a chance to talk to him, right?

  2. 2
    Redshift says:

    Hardly anyone is doing enough to support dissidents and freedom advocates these days.

    Yes, it’s so terrible that we’re not primarily freeing oppressed peoples from this mortal coil, or trumpeting our public support for dissidents who don’t want it because it’s used to undermine their work, and instead we’re engaging in quiet and competent diplomacy.

    No big surprise the source asked to remain anonymous, since the only proper attribution would be “a former Bush administration official who is so full of shit his eyes were turning brown.”

    I also find it hilarious that he didn’t want “to be identified presuming to speak for Bush.” He didn’t have any problem actually presuming to speak for Bush, just with being identified doing it.

  3. 3
    runt says:

    “How to Create an Awsome Economy” by George W. Bush:

    Step 1: Get your daddy to buy you a new economy.
    Step 2: Profit!

  4. 4
    eric says:

    @runt: i think you have to replace Step 2 with “no profit, go bankrupt.”

  5. 5
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    So, how many times can one say “tax cuts” in a book, before it becomes obvious that that’s all you’re saying, and who’d be stupid enough to buy such a thing?

    Oh, wait, there’s a guaranteed audience of at least two: BoBo and the Moustasche…

  6. 6
    runt says:

    @eric:

    That’s such a reality-based view of things. Bush is way beyond that. He’s history’s actor, you know. He creates his own reality.

  7. 7
    catclub says:

    It is really all good.

    He can advocate what he did when he was Pres.
    Start wars, deficit spending => outcome catastrophe

    Or he can advocate what he did not do, and be asked why he did
    not do those things.

    Or he could shut up.

  8. 8

    Maybe it wouldn’t be the best book tour of all time.

    But it’d be the best one of *our* time. That’s for sure.

    Of course it ain’t gonna happen, but that doesn’t stop us from dreaming beautiful dreams.

  9. 9
    Mike in NC says:

    “George W. Bush’s Alternate History Sci-Fi Book Where He Knows How To Run A Country“

    More like “Knows How To Ruin A Country”. Thanks, Dry Drunk!

  10. 10
    Jennifer says:

    I think Surreal American said it best over at Sadly, No!:

    Surreal American said,
    May 17, 2012 at 16:56

    So for $24.95, Bush will “share” his prescription for economic growth with us?
    Why didn’t he bother sharing it for the eight years he was president?

    So how many pages of “cut taxes” typed over and over again will that book contain? It’ll be like that scene in The Shining, except that Bush’s inner demons will have to keep explaining things to him.

    Sadly, No!, 5/17/12

  11. 11
    TenguPhule says:

    . Hardly anyone is doing enough to support dissidents and freedom advocates these days

    I support Iraqi dissidents to gut The whole Bush clan slowly over a hot fire.

    There, happy now?

  12. 12
    Patricia Kayden says:

    Unqualified folks on the right love to write books. Didn’t Bristol write an autobiography about abstinence? So I have no problem with George’s book. Just won’t buy it.

  13. 13
    R. Porrofatto says:

    Taking a cue from the aborted Judith Regan/O.J. Simpson book, I’m hoping Bush’s is called something like “Fucking Up the Economy: If I Did It, Here’s How It Happened.”

  14. 14
    Mike G says:

    an assemblage of interviews with dissidents who took on autocratic regimes

    So Joe Wilson will be featured?

  15. 15
    Joseph Nobles says:

    Isn’t it going to hard to find an urban location 25 miles away from a DSW store?

  16. 16
    bob h says:

    Presumably there will be a chapter entitled “The Art of International Diplomacy”.

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