In the middle of a wild party to celebrate Wiley Cash’s book release. he came into town to give a presentation to the faculty and students (he teaches here at Bethany), and now I have 15-20 very tipsy academics in my house (and my dad is here humiliating me once again with embarrassing stories from my youth). Here’s Wiley and his lovely wife Mallory:
We’re still working on the details to have a live chat or two with Wiley, but I figured we should wait a while until people have a chance to read the book. You can purchase his book here. Wiley’s personal website is here, and you can read various chapters free.
*** Update ***
Things have taken a turn for the crazy:
It’s only ten. I have a feeling I am going to be washing carpets tomorrow.
cathyx
Finally.
Spaghetti Lee
now I have 15-20 very tipsy academics in my house
Oh, the possibilities!
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
So that’s what happened to Mulder at the end of the X-Files!
cathyx
Finally.
Corner Stone
Well, I would’ve considered it. But the center margin bullshit totes threw me off.
Raven
Laissez les bons temps rouler
Cain
Can’t wait for Tunch to make an appearance..
what flesh of animal is being sacrificed to the coal gods today?
Beautiful day in Portland today!
Spaghetti Lee
now I have 15-20 very tipsy academics in my house
Oh, the possibilities!
cathyx
Finally.
Baud
Woo hoo! New thread. It was getting a little crowded in the last one.
Any way to make this one troll-free?
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
So that’s what happened to Mulder at the end of the X-Files!
Corner Stone
And let me tell you, you have not lived til you’ve heard Leonard Nimoy narrate a documentary of the Titanic.
Not lived! I tells you.
Raven
Laissez les bons temps rouler
Linkmeister
From the synopsis at Wiley’s site: “a snake handling ex-convict turned preacher.”
And Chuck Colson died today! Prescience or serendipity?
Spaghetti Lee
and now I have 15-20 very tipsy academics in my house
It ain’t a party ’til the college professors show up!
Corner Stone
Recent comments. Or you can go fuck yourself Cole.
Raven
Laissez les bons temps rouler
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
So now I know what happened to Mulder after the X-Files. That beard really isn’t much of a disguise “Wiley”. Or should I call you Spooky?
Linkmeister
From the synopsis at Wiley’s site: “a snake handling ex-convict turned preacher.”
And Chuck Colson died today! Prescience or serendipity?
Raven
Laissez les bons temps rouler
Yutsano
@Cain: It was really really hard to show up for my OT shift today. I still managed to fumble through it though. It does look nice on the paycheck I tell you what. :)
cathyx
@Corner Stone: I do love his narrations of the unexplained. They always end with a question mark.
Yutsano
@Cain: It was really really hard to show up for my OT shift today. I still managed to fumble through it though. It does look nice on the paycheck I tell you what. :)
Baud
Awesome! This is one of those Groundhog Day threads.
Corner Stone
There’s some weird shit going on in this thread. I feel like I’m Lisa Bonet in Angel Heart or some shit.
jl
@Cain: I think you can see part of Tunch behind the sofa.
Only exciting news here is that it was the fourth annual goat festival at the SF Ferry Building (very precious and expensive) farmers market.
4th Annual Goat Festival | Ferry Building
http://sf.funcheap.com/annual-goat-festival-ferry-building/
The very provocative and alluring ‘goat girls’ were not there this year.
Yutsano
Did FYWP just have a seizure?
Linkmeister
Sorry for the dupe; the site hung.
General Stuck
Gotta say. Wiley Cash is one cool name.
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
Damn, the hamsters powering this comments section seem to have gone all Breitbart on us.
Baud
Chuck Grassley tweet:
Schlemizel
I had a drunk academic once. She was 26 & I was 16. But to have 15 or 20? Man! On my best night I think I have only been able to do 10 or 11
+5 or 6, I forget
cathyx
@General Stuck: It sounds like a name in a western.
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@Baud:
Is sucombing like a comb-over?
blueintheface
@Cain:
Speaking of Tunch. Meow says Tunch can’t hold his mawashi.
Corner Stone
I’m freakin’ out, man!
danielx
Party to the max…one vote for The Band’s cover of Atlantic City as background music, in memory of Levon Helm.
Jay S
@Corner Stone: Geez Stoner, I’ve tried to tell you all that you can get a passable imitation of semi-recent comments by using the “Comments RSS” feed listed on the right hand side. It probably works best as a live bookmarks link.
Corner Stone
Ooooo, Recent Comments. I feel like I’m home again.
Baud
@Matoko Borgia-Steeler: I’m afraid it’s far kinkier and more disturbing than that. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DO NOT GOOGLE!
Baud
@Corner Stone: For once we agree. RECENT COMMENTS IS BACK! ALL HAIL RECENT COMMENTS!
Yutsano
IS THAT ABL SHAKING HER GROOVE THANG??
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@Baud:
You mean I might be exposed to Chuck “Studly” Grassley sucombing and fucombing?
Corner Stone
@Jay S: That wasn’t the point amigo. I’ve twisted, contorted and adapted to all the fucked up sociological experiments DougJ has designed to put us through to comment on this blog.
Over the years I’ve used the tilde instead of the dash, manually inserted the Reply, and any number of other workarounds to get by here. It’s been fun.
But Recent Comments makes or breaks this fucking blog.
handy
@Corner Stone:
ahem
danielx
@blueintheface:
And I thought the two fifteen pounders here had weight issues. That is just….grotesque.
Joseph Nobles
@Linkmeister: Shouldn’t that be “ex-convict turned snake-handling preacher”? Not that you wrote the copy…
Jay S
@Corner Stone: I tried to light a candle, but I guess cursing the darkness worked after all.
Corner Stone
@handy: Just like the whiny bitches of the GLBT crowd after DADT repeal, I give Cole no credit for doing what was right all along.
AliceBlue
It looks like everyone in that pic is playing Twister.
Raven
@Corner Stone: Feelin kinda ornery there are ya?
Joseph Nobles
BTW, nice picture of Wiley and Mallory on the +4 Couch of Perpetual Bachelorhood.
Corner Stone
@Jay S: ”
There’s a darkness upon me that’s flooded in light
In the fine print they tell me what’s wrong and what’s right
And it comes in black and it comes in white
And I’m frightened by those that don’t see it
”
The Avett Brothers. Give ’em a looksee.
Schlemizel
Judging by the picture they are obviously white & not quite pickled enough yet to dance
Raven
@AliceBlue: That widescreen is in the field of fire!
Corner Stone
@Raven: Fuck off!
Too much?
Comrade Javamanphil
Not a fan of Magic Hat number 9. And that was even before Genesee bought them. If you need something from the Green Mountain state, I recommend Rock Art. I’ll still check out Wiley’s book though.
Raven
@Corner Stone: Don’t matter to me. My knee hurts like a motherfucker.
Corner Stone
Good Lord! I don’t know what’s more terrifying. The checkerboard skirt or the hair whipping.
danielx
Washing carpets, hell, the last time I was at a party that looked like that the mattresses got thrown out. You be lucky if the carpet is the only thing that needs disinfecting.
Amir Khalid
@Matoko Borgia-Steeler:
I Want To Believe is actually pretty good as X-Files episodes go. It gives a plausible look at Mulder and Scully are, six years out of the FBI. But it had the misfortune of being a small movie made on a TV budget — which was promoted by the eejits at 20th Century Fox as a summer blockbuster, and then opened the week before The Dark Knight. As a fan, I’m still sore about that blunder.
shoutingattherain
Time to break out “Twister”.
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
It would be irresponsible not to speculate… what could a youthful Cole possibly have done that would be so embarrassing?
Raven
Is that a baby bottle on the table?
Baud
@Matoko Borgia-Steeler: I heard he was a Republican for a while.
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@Amir Khalid:
This is true. I like the Wiley version better, don’t you?
eldorado
one of those kind of parties
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@Baud:
Sort of an apprentice snake-handler?
BGinCHI
I’m trying not to picture Cole doing the white man’s overbite.
Nope, there it is. Damn.
I guess it beats rolling the dice.
Steeplejack
@jl:
Mmm . . . goat girls.
Narcissus
Is that lady on the right sitting in mid-air?
the Conster (f/k/a Cat Lady)
Gettin’ down with your bad selves. Is the music in the bottom picture Sly?
Raven
@BGinCHI: Nice day in the Classic City, Roots Music festival downtown and a gazillion activities all over. School is over in mid-May and the bike races and human rights festival are coming right up.
danielx
Perusing The Rude Pundit – headline:
How can you not look at a post with a title like that? Kind of like seeing the aftermath of a bad car accident, you don’t want to look but you do it anyway.
http://rudepundit.blogspot.com/2012/04/your-gay-loving-immorality-forced.html
Raven
@danielx: That’s a bear bryant skirt.
BGinCHI
@Narcissus: Is that a euphemism for falling? Because yes, it looks like the woman in boots has tripped up her heels. Good thing Cole keeps an attorney tied up in the basement.
Cain
@Yutsano:
Sadly, this is all one big troll by Oregon weather. They will give you the best weather ever, and then for the next 2 months they are going to drag the rain and cold for all that it is worth. It’s actually very very cruel.
Little Boots
the secret service is gay for hookers.
who knew?
Amir Khalid
@Matoko Borgia-Steeler:
Me too.
BGinCHI
@Raven: Bestest time of the year there, for sure. I wish I could just beam myself down there. Not sure the car seat fits in the transporter.
Baud
@danielx: Gays used to be responsible for 9-11. They’ve really lost their game since they’ve started settling down.
danielx
@Raven:
I gotta know….a Bear Bryant skirt?
I just know I’m going to regret asking about this.
Corner Stone
Why is there an oyster fisherman in the middle of Cole’s party?
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@Baud:
Yeah, marriage does sap the creative juices.
Raven
@danielx: Houndstooth,
http://sosuitable.files.wordpress.com/2011/07/paul-bear-bryant11.jpg
danielx
@Baud:
They were responsible for Hurricane Katrina. Also. Too.
Steeplejack
@Raven:
I never thought Bear looked very good in a skirt. The hat worked, though.
BGinCHI
@Baud: My favorite phrase is “the gay agenda.”
Yeah, like more than three gay guys could agree on anything. Life is too fabulous for agendas.
Only right wing Christians can all agree on something, since they have no individuality. And what they mostly agree on is being dicks.
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@BGinCHI:
I can’t keep the gay agenda straight these days. It’s very confusing.
BGinCHI
Not sure what’s worse, that we’re watching a party on a blog taking place in WV, or that we’re doing it based on two photos.
My excuse is the baby.
Little Boots
@Baud:
yeah, this whole marriage thing has been a disaster.
Baud
@BGinCHI: I never had a problem with “gay agenda” because I think human equality is a perfectly fine agenda to have.
Steeplejack
@danielx:
It’s the pattern, not the article of clothing.
handy
Boy those white people can sure dance. Aren’t they something?
Raven
The dude in the back is barefoot!
Schlemizel
Hang on, is that a scale in front of the woman wearing the al queda burnoose for a dress? WTF goes on at these parties
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@handy:
They’ll be buying steak and plasma TVs any day now – with YOUR TAX MONEY!
BGinCHI
@Matoko Borgia-Steeler: I hope the agenda continues to include making my neighborhood better all the time.
jwb
@Corner Stone: I like the gratuitous swipe at DougJ, but you should really have complained about how we only get 5 recent comments now, whereas we used to get 10. WTF, Cole can only afford 5 recent comments?!! Hell, he didn’t even bother to upgrade the trolls.
Little Boots
@handy: ‘
it’s positively romneyesque.
Narcissus
@BGinCHI: yeah I just realized this is what I’m doing on saturday night
Steeplejack
@Raven, @Steeplejack:
Whoa, there should be a term for this. “Google-flooding”?
BGinCHI
Is it possible the President of Bethany College doesn’t know about the internet?
Raven
@Steeplejack: “You gots to give the peoples what dey wants”
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@BGinCHI:
Isn’t that unconstitutional though? Don’t you have the right to dwell in heterosexual monochrome squalor? I am sure there’s something in the 8th Amendment about it.
Little Boots
@Matoko Borgia-Steeler:
that whole sentence is confusing.
Jebediah
@Corner Stone:
The Avett Brothers are a thing of great beauty.
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@Little Boots:
I reject your hetero-normative grammatical discourse! Whatever the rubbery fuck that means.
danielx
@Steeplejack:
Well, that woman looks like she would/should have better taste. Favorite of the Crimson Tide or not, that pattern is a seriously heinous offense. But just like the regular police, the fashion police are never around when you need them and always around when you don’t.
gogol's wife
@BGinCHI:
The close analysis of the second photo on this thread is keeping me fascinated. I could not deal with the Breitbart thread, it was so meta-meta-meta.
BGinCHI
@Matoko Borgia-Steeler: You’re thinking of the suburbs. Or the FL that is not Miami.
Baud
WHY WON’T COLE INVITE US OVER FOR ONE OF HIS FABULOUS PARTIES!?
Little Boots
@Matoko Borgia-Steeler:
As well you should, straight away.
handy
@Matoko Borgia-Steeler:
Hey, I saw what you did there.
Baud
@gogol’s wife: It’s like one of those kids’ puzzles where you’re supposed to find all the things that are wrong with the picture.
Corner Stone
@BGinCHI: What do you mean? I’m watching a replay of the LPGA Lotte tourny on the Golf Channel. And I’m totally cool with that.
I can honestly say I prefer to be home and have had a heated argument with my 7 year old regarding the Titanic, than show up in one of the pics above.
BGinCHI
@Jebediah: Shit I love the Avett Bros. I think we’ve mentioned this in a thread before, non?
I also like the Felice Brothers a lot.
Not to be confused with the Pernice Brothers, who are also really good.
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
What’s really depressing is that this party obviously excludes Real Americans. I mean, there isn’t a single pop-eyed lunatic waving a gun to be seen. I call bigotry on this whole perverted display of liberal elite homosapientry.
BGinCHI
@gogol’s wife: It’s like the Kennedy assassination, but with less brains.
Baud
@jwb:
I blame Obama.
Corner Stone
@jwb: Man, I’m just so giddy about having ANY Recent Comments. I seriously don’t know what to do with myself.
Oh wait, yes I do.
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@Baud:
Yeah, if he hadn’t betrayed us, we could have had the public option also too.
BGinCHI
@Corner Stone: What was the 7 year old’s position, that Leo is “a really good actor trapped in a sub-par vehicle”?
gogol's wife
@BGinCHI:
That comment can be read in two different ways. I guess that’s the point.
Corner Stone
@Jebediah: It’s crazy. Somebody recently bought and sent me iTunes and one was The Avett Brothers.
So fucking good. So good.
BGinCHI
@gogol’s wife: My chess is dimensional.
danielx
@Baud:
Because then he would have the police showing up for…something. And I’ve got a vivid mental picture of calling my spouse at half past dead to tell her I need her to get hold of a bail bond guy in West Virginia. Yes, that conversation would go well.
Baud
@Matoko Borgia-Steeler: Mitt Romney will protect us from the specter of government-run blogs. VICTORY!
BGinCHI
@Baud: I want a thread where every single comment is:
VICTORY!
gogol's wife
I really shouldn’t say this, не сглазить, but there aren’t any trolls on this thread.
Little Boots
now I suddenly wanna hear avett brothers.
Citizen_X
Drunk academics, woo-hoo!
@Corner Stone:
You know goddam well those aren’t legal in Texas.
Corner Stone
@BGinCHI: Actually we were watching a documentary. Not the schmaltz.
Our discussion was related to some deeper methodology regarding materials and hubris.
He had some good points though. Have to give him that.
Little Boots
@Citizen_X:
manually inserted is … suggestive.
Baud
@BGinCHI: We should so do that when Obama wins in November.
gogol's wife
@Baud:
не сглазить, не сглазить (don’t put the evil eye on it)
Little Boots
@Baud:
awesome.
Corner Stone
@Citizen_X: I’ve manually inserted my tilde into the dash on more than a few occasions. And FSM bless them, they all wanted more.
Unfortunately, that was it. Every time.
asiangrrlMN
@BGinCHI: VICTORY! Makes me laugh every time.
Cole, looks like a good time is being had. The Cashes are a handsome couple, indeed. You are a good host – where are pics of the food? Oh, and TUNCHIE!
@Little Boots: Bootsie! How the hell are you?
Little Boots
I’m okay, just babbling to myself in a corner over here.
which I like.
how are you?
PurpleGirl
@Baud: Ah, but so did Pepsi… Are they supposed to give soda completely?
Linnaeus
As a sorta-academic, I can say that “tipsy academic” at a party is often a redundancy.
Baud
@PurpleGirl: Ha! Pepsi must donate more money to Grassley than Coke.
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
Of course, they aren’t really having a good time, you know. They are just pretending. Cole’s probably got horribly, disgustingly, enjoyably compromising pictures of all of them and he’s forcing them to smile and drink and contort themselves into hedonistic postures.
Baud
@gogol’s wife: You are going to have a long 6 months.
asiangrrlMN
@Little Boots: You’re not babbling to yourself or else I’m eavesdropping. I’m brooding, but it’s befitting of me. Carry on babbling!
@Little Boots: I come and I go, like the tides. Fucking magnets, how do they work?!?
Gus
@Raven: It’s WV, what do you expect?
Little Boots
@asiangrrlMN:
aw, don’t worry. I’m sure I will.
actually, it’s great to see you again. well not see you. hear you, well, not hear you so much as …
oh, hell it’s great you’re here.
Suffern ACE
@Baud: Next week I’m sure coke will announce that it is replacing corn syrup with Cuban sugar and that it’s giving it’s secret formula to Kim III to give North Korea the upper hand in any future wars.
Gravenstone
@Baud: It sounds like Cole’s partiers tend to invite themselves much of the time.
Little Boots
@Gravenstone:
As it should be. like a blog.
Steeplejack
@BGinCHI:
I was miffed that I couldn’t find the Pernice Brothers’ version of “Distant Sun” on YouTube the other night. Turns out it’s “There Goes the Sun.” D’oh!
“Distant Sun” is good too–by Crowded House.
Baud
@Gravenstone: That’s EXACTLY what we should do. Someone needs to do a reverse trace on this site and find out where Cole lives like they do on NCIS and then we just all show up one day.
Little Boots
@Baud:
He’d LOVE that. well, some of you he’d love that. some of us, not so sure.
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@Baud:
I can already tell you how Cole will greet you:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7BT00WU7Iss
kc
For a misanthrope, you sure are sociable …
Little Boots
and steeplejack, bringing the gift of music.
Steeplejack
@Little Boots:
Yutsano downgraded my musical taste from “exquisite” to “eclectic” last night. Wah. At least he didn’t go as far as “eccentric.”
Yutsano
@asiangrrlMN: Hi hon. Did you see earlier tale about how work Dawg almost killed me? There’s an epilogue too!
@Steeplejack: Oh. Oops. I sincerely thought that was an autocorrect goof! I have Girl Scout cookies still to share in apologia.
Baud
All right you crazy party animals. I need to go to bed so I can get up bright and early for Anne Laurie’s Sunday Morning Open Thread. Toodles.
Odie Hugh Manatee
Nobody is being held upside-down while chugging on a beer bong that’s being fed by three kegs. That and there’s no midgets.
I’m not impressed. ;p
The prophet Nostradumbass
Was the Twister mat photoshopped out of that second picture?
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@The prophet Nostradumbass:
ACORN! Conspiracy! Hugo Chavez!
Yutsano
@Odie Hugh Manatee: The night is young, good sir. The night is young.
Little Boots
@Odie Hugh Manatee:
so I’m guessing Doug hasn’t shown up yet.
Comrade Mary
Oh, don’t worry, John. It isn’t as if you fed your guests any fresh moles from the yard.
Everyone looks lovely and they’re obviously having a great time. Well done!
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@efgoldman:
The details of my life are quite inconsequential.
danielx
@Odie Hugh Manatee:
I hear that. I’ve always felt that I’ll know when I’ve achieved true financial independence because I’ll say “bring me my midgets!” and something will actually happen.
asiangrrlMN
@Steeplejack: Your musical taste is both exquisite and eclectic!
@Yutsano: NO! Which thread?!?
Steeplejack
@Yutsano:
Yeah, probably that last box of crappy ones you bought just to round out your order. Hmmph. Good day, sir!
Steeplejack
@asiangrrlMN:
Good to see you! It’s almost like a night-shift reunion with you and Yutsy here. Don’t know if I have the stamina to go the distance tonight, though. Hmm, maybe because I haven’t had a drink.
Be right back.
Little Boots
@Steeplejack:
help stamp out sobriety.
handy
@Matoko Borgia-Steeler:
Do those inconsequential details happen to bring teh buttocks by chance?
Odie Hugh Manatee
@danielx:
I was fortunate in my formative years to have had a midget living nearby who was quite the party animal. He was a regular at parties all over the area. There was no midget tossing but just having one (or more when his friends joined in) partying with everyone else makes a good party even better.
Wild times in the old hood made for lots of great memories that make good stories, some of which can only be told to very few. Luckily I was an observer and entertainer (guitarist), I dabbled in the fun but it was more fun to watch the entertaining mayhem unfold.
Usually with some babe under my arm. Priorities…
asiangrrlMN
@Steeplejack: ::beers you:: Come on, Steepman, stay up and play with us for awhile!
Yutsano
@Steeplejack: No cookie crack for you then Mr Crankypants! Champers. Now. And don’t come back until you are sufficiently verschnickered. Then I’ll deal with you.
@asiangrrlMN: Here. He came this close to punching me out. NYD thinks he should have followed through. I’ll kick him later. :)
Matoko Borgia-Steeler
@handy:
I don’t know. When I see Mr Inconsequential-Detail or his lovely wife Ms Irrelevant-Factoid I shall make a point of asking them.
Steeplejack
@asiangrrlMN:
I’m here. Noticed a new thread has opened upstairs.
Now I’m playing “Distant Sun” over and over. No good can come of this.
JoyfulA
@PurpleGirl: In Utah, no one’s allowed to drink Coke or Pepsi anyhow.
Jebediah
@BGinCHI:
Yeah, I think they came up sometime or other. I’m assuming you have seen their Austin City Limits performance? I liked it.
So I guess I have a couple other brothers to check out…
Jebediah
@Little Boots:
DO IT!
You won’t regret it.
asiangrrlMN
@Steeplejack: I’m listening to Tim Minchin, trying to bolster my spirits. I’ll join you upthread.
@Yutsano: OK, it’s your own damn fault. I gotta back the Dawgs on this one.
Yutsano
@asiangrrlMN: It was my fault. But the thirty seconds of stunned silence while the battle computer recalibrated was actually hilarious. I’m glad I had the discipline to not laugh. Then he WOULD have killed me.
asiangrrlMN
@Yutsano: And I would have helped him bury the body.
Barry
How about linking to B&N, Powell’s or a local bookstore instead of amazon for a change?
Andree-Anne Desmedt
Where are Tunch and the girls?