Cooking with gasbag

Somewhere in Massachusetts, a cold shiver just ran up Tom Levenson’s back, for Megan McArdle has published her “Holiday Gift Guide 2011: Kitchen Edition“.

Now, I love cooking (my old English Fruit cake with propofol icing has won several awards) and I love gadgets (particularly the sort that are made by Germans out of latex and make the lights dim in three states when I turn them on), but McMegan’s list is truly terrifying.

Megan says that “Space is somewhat limited in our kitchen“, and given that she appears to own every piece of crap that has ever been flogged to the gullible and the taste-free, I’m not surprised. I have visions of her dessicated corpse being found some day, trapped between the piles of old copies of the New York Times that line the walls of her apartment, smothered beneath an avalanche of chicken-shaped spoon holders and fish spatulas, all liberally lubricated with rancid butter (salted and salt-free!) that has spilled out from her (now water-depleted) butter boats.

It’s hard to pick favourites from her list, but I’m particularly enamoured of the Salt Pig, which may be the ugliest piece of kitchenware I have ever seen:

At least it matches the colour of her salt.

Helpfully, Megan suggests several solutions to those global problems which bedevil us all, including the Kuhn Rikon Egg Separating Set because:

Separating eggs by hand is not hard, but it’s tedious…

and the Swivel Store Spice Rack because:

Like most people who like to cook, I am obsessed with finding a solution to The Spice Problem.

Thankfully, this last apparently flouts the laws of physics by holding all her spices:

happily (and neatly) over the microwave, where they’re paradoxically easy to get at, and safely out of the way.

If only Zeno had known about that he wouldn’t have had to do all that messing around with tortoises and arrows.

Megan even recommends not only a gravy separator, but also a warming gravy boat. Starving children in Eritrea can rest easy now, knowing that Megan’s guests will never be exposed to cold, fatty sauces.

She (of course) triples down on the fucking Thermomix, in its third mention in as many weeks. I’m pretty sure she’s angling for a freebie, so she can wedge herself between two of them and have them rhythmically whirl, whirl, whirl her towards orgasm.

The thing that stands out most of all for me, however, is this:

I’ll frequently make a pot of rice at night and melt some cheese on top, eat some for dinner, and the rest for breakfast.

Despite all Megan’s crapping on about her fantasy world of “shiny chocolate glazes” and custards and foams and perfect bechamel, buried in the middle of the article we get one solitary glimpse of the truth – sad, pathetic Megan, surrounded by her shelves and drawers and hills of tat and rubbish, shovelling cheese and rice into her face in a futile attempt to fill the aching void in her soul.

[H/t to commenter Trentrunner, who got there first.]






208 replies
  1. 1
    cathyx says:

    No gourmand would eat rice with cheese melted on it.

  2. 2
    cathyx says:

    And it’s probably velveta.

  3. 3
    gaz says:

    This post.

    Wow.

    The last sentence somehow almost made me feel a tugging despair on MM’s behalf. And I dislike her immensely.

  4. 4
    The Other Chuck says:

    sad, pathetic Megan, surrounded by her shelves and drawers and hills of tat and rubbish, shovelling cheese and rice into her face in a futile attempt to fill the aching void in her soul.

    That … … … … is gonna leave a mark. I mean wow, you made me feel sorry for McMegan.

  5. 5
    Special Patrol Group says:

    I actually use a burr grinder for grinding coffee now. But as I pointed out last year, the difference between fresh ground coffee and pre-ground is much larger than the difference between blade-ground and burr-ground; if you don’t want to invest in a burr grinder, these do a very fine job.

    What a fucking snob.

  6. 6

    I’ll frequently make a pot of rice at night and melt some cheese on top, eat some for dinner, and the rest for breakfast.

    I don’t care what any of you say. I would totally do that. Really sharp cheddar on brown rice is awesome.

  7. 7
    ericblair says:

    Separating eggs by hand is not hard, but it’s tedious…

    Fuck. She must be one of those Infomercial People: you know, the ones that try to peel a potato with normal kitchen implements and end up taking their arm off. This is all just Ronco Egg-O-Matic shit made from shiny copper and sixty times the price.

    Yeah, separating an egg using a bowl and a goddamn eggshell takes what, ten seconds? Take an introductory cooking course and spare yourself a lifetime of idiot gewgaws.

  8. 8
    Vlad on the Tracks says:

    Nicely done, title to closing lines.

    I’ve never even heard of making rice and pouring cheese on top and then eating it. I guess that is marginally better than making rice and pouring cheese on top and then throwing it at the bride and groom.

  9. 9
    jayboat says:

    Every time I see a mcbargle thread I think, no way can she top the last ‘one’. As usual, I would be mistaken. How in hell does this woman still have a job?

    There’s definitely a new tag line in that claptrap somewhere.

    Like white on rice with cheese on top.

  10. 10
    Special Patrol Group says:

    I am not a neat cook.

    Unless she’s using the $1500 robot chef that costs $1500 and she simply had to have once she saw one. But remember:

    Not everyone should own one.

    What a fucking snob.

  11. 11
    rb says:

    Goddam, Sarah. I actually feel kind of bad for McMegan now. Remind me never to piss you off.

  12. 12
    gaz says:

    the cheese and rice thing seems kinda gross to me.

    a little salt/pepper/butter maybe.. (although I prefer just soy sauce)

    meh – I like cheese. and I like rice… but… hmmm

  13. 13
    The Other Chuck says:

    Eggshell? Shit man, I just use my fingers. If I really need to be sanitary, I use a slotted spoon. Fucking eggs, how do they work?

    Brown rice, cheddar cheese, and cayenne pepper … that was a pretty regular meal for me when I was dirt poor. My housemate worked at a gourmet food packing plant so I could occasionally get a pretty deep discount on dill havarti for a change in pace.

  14. 14
    gaz says:

    @jayboat:

    Like white on rice with cheese on top.

    +1 internetz

    thanks for the lol

  15. 15
    beltane says:

    McMegan’s salt pig looks vaguely NSFW though I am having trouble determining which orifice it resembles the most. I’ve always suspected that most of these expensive kitchen gadgets are for people who view cooking as one of those exciting activities they only do on rare and special occasions. Kind of the way some people, deciding they need to walk to get into shape, have to go out and buy a jogging suit just so they can look athletic while they stroll around the block. Does McMegan have a special cooking outfit she wears while she heats up her Minute Rice with Velveeta?

  16. 16
    Special Patrol Group says:

    Betty Crocker 1950 Picture Cookbook Still my go-to for basic baking and comfort food like macaroni and cheese.

    Keep it real, sista! When you’re not using your $1500 chopper/weigher/cooker hat costs $1500, I mean.

  17. 17
    Special Patrol Group says:

    I first used one of these in England, and though American kettles will never be as good as the ones in England

    Yes, yes, when you were in England. Tell me, dearie, did you make it over to Teh Continent? You simply must try the rice and cheese in Lyons. So superior to such in the New World.

    What a fucking snob.

  18. 18
    Soonergrunt says:

    I’m pretty sure she’s angling for a freebie, so she can wedge herself between two of them and have them rhythmically whirl, whirl, whirl her towards orgasm.

    That’s cruel in two ways–
    1 Making the first swipe at her empty soul and the loneliness that accompanies same, setting up the coup de grace in the final paragraph, which she totally deserves, and
    2 Planting that particular disturbing image in my brain, which I totally do NOT deserve. I might have to pop my own eyes out with McMegan’s figural chicken measuring spoon set.

    Oh, and “cooking with gasbag”? Simply wonderful!

  19. 19
    Mattski says:

    Separating an egg? Use right hannd to crack egg into cupped left hand. let egg white run between fingers into bowl, cleverly placed under left hand. Place yoke in 2nd bowl. You can do a dozen eggs in under a minute.

    edit. And Chuck is cleverly ahead of me on this one

  20. 20
    Special Patrol Group says:

    expensive knives hold an edge better

    She is so horrible.

  21. 21
    cathyx says:

    @Mattski: Why not just use the egg shell instead of your hand? It’s less messy.

  22. 22
    beltane says:

    @ericblair: I learned to separate eggs with ease by the time I was 11. There is nothing remotely tedious about it. I find most gadgets to be tedious because they all have to be washed which ends up being pretty f*cking tedious.

    Why do I get the feeling that this woman grew up eating nothing but fish sticks, canned peas, and dried out little pork chops?

  23. 23
    Raven says:

    There is nothing in the world wrong with a fat separator, nothing.

  24. 24
    Mike in NC says:

    I’ll frequently make a pot of rice at night and melt some cheese on top, eat some for dinner, and the rest for breakfast.

    Oh, McMegan. YUCK!

  25. 25
    Little Boots says:

    is she the goob that can’t admit she’s rich and ridiculously privileged?

    in other words, is she a libertarian?

  26. 26
    Svensker says:

    @TooManyJens:

    I don’t care what any of you say. I would totally do that. Really sharp cheddar on brown rice is awesome.

    Agreed. Buttered rice with lots of parmesan and fresh pepper is really good also too. Yum.

  27. 27
    Special Patrol Group says:

    $1500 Thermomix that costs $1500:
    5. Peeling garlic I have not myself tried to do 50 cloves at a time, but I’ve done a dozen, and it’s near-miraculous–just soak the cloves in water and then run the blades in reverse for a bit. Knocks the peels right off.

    Less than $1500, and I bet quicker.

  28. 28
    cathyx says:

    @Raven: I wish they would invent one for my body.

  29. 29
    Citizen_X says:

    Goddam it! Now my new band, the Salt Pigs, is gonna have to come up with a different name.

    It’s pretty clear what Megan’s duty in reeducation camp is going to be: line cook, preferrably with some old Army Master Sargent running the kitchen, screaming “MCARDLE! HOW FUCKING LONG DOES IT TAKE YOU TO SEPARATE SOME GODDAMNED EGGS?”

  30. 30

    @Svensker: Mmmm. You know, I haven’t had dinner yet …

  31. 31
    wilfred says:

    The obsession with this woman has become creepy and Heatherish.

    What’s sadder and more pathetic, her or people who have nothing better to do than make fun of sad and pathetic people.

  32. 32
    Raven says:

    @cathyx: Almost any reply would likely incite a flame war!

  33. 33
    Little Boots says:

    @wilfred:

    she’s got a platform.

    mockery ensues.

  34. 34
    Raven says:

    @wilfred: Back to back with this Sullivan person.

  35. 35
    cathyx says:

    @wilfred: Tell us about yourself. Then we can make fun of you.

  36. 36
    beltane says:

    @Citizen_X: She’s nowhere near ready to be a line cook. Like all novices in a kitchen, she needs to start out as a dishwasher. If she can hack that, then she could move up to doing prep work like peeling potatoes and carrots and such.

  37. 37
    Special Patrol Group says:

    I didn’t see any disclaimer noting that she gets a piece of the action for anything ordered through her links to Amazon. She’s pulled that crap in years past and even updated her post after someone called her on it. Yet no acknowledgement this go ’round. She’s so horrible.

  38. 38
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Special Patrol Group: A tacky snob to boot.

  39. 39
    Raven says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: Somebody must like her, they keep bringing her up.

  40. 40
    Little Boots says:

    omnes,

    Scottie Walker is doomed, right?

    Oh please tell me he’s doomed.

  41. 41
    stickler says:

    @Special Patrol Group: No, and Hell No. Take your twenty garlic cloves, put them in your martini shaker (without gin or ice, of course), and shake the hell out of ’em. One minute later: peeled garlic.

    Thank me later. (Or, thank the Cooking Network, which did the same thing with two metal bowls, which I didn’t have, so I substituted my martini shaker, which I did have.)

  42. 42
    fasteddie9318 says:

    I hope she at least uses her thermonuclear blender, the one that not everyone should own lest they devalue its status and thus deprive her of the pleasure of owning it, to process the cheese into a sauce before she pours it over the rice. Lord knows that I, as one of the untouchable caste, could never master the complexities of creating a cheese sauce myself, so I like to imagine that Society’s Winners, like Megan, do such things all the time. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a can of SPAM that’s calling my name.

  43. 43
    BGinCHI says:

    Is it mean and petty to make fun of Megan’s ears?

    If it’s cruel to point out that she has huge ears, then I won’t do it.

  44. 44
    beltane says:

    @Special Patrol Group: That’s so cool. Garlic shaking looks like a good job for the kids.

  45. 45
  46. 46
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @wilfred: I am going to go with people who harangue the people who have nothing better to do than make fun of sad and pathetic people who happen to be McMegan.

  47. 47
    The Other Chuck says:

    @cathyx:

    Every time I try to use the shell, I either catch the yolk on the edge or it slips out entirely. Fingers work every time. Who cares about mess, it’s just egg white, rinses right off. Not something you can get away with in a restaurant of course, but another reason why I prefer to keep my hobbies as hobbies and not professions.

  48. 48
    ThatLeftTurnInABQ says:

    I’ll frequently make a pot of rice at night and melt some cheese on top, eat some for dinner, and the rest for breakfast.

    Well, we’ve learned one new thing at least. Now we known just exactly where all that calculator-breaking gastritis comes from.

  49. 49
    Little Boots says:

    @BGinCHI:

    You know Ayn Rand totally would have.

    bitch.

  50. 50
    dmsilev says:

    I’ll bet, without checking, that she owns one of those bagel guillotine thingies, meant for people who can’t wield a bread knife without cutting off a minimum of two fingers.

  51. 51
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Raven: Sure, and people watch horror movies as well. The appalling and gruesome can have a fascination as long as long as it isn’t real.(FN1)

    (FN1) McMegan is a fictional character, right?

  52. 52
    fasteddie9318 says:

    @dmsilev: Yes, OK, but only because drawing a knife back and forth through an entire bagel is extraordinarily tedious and a waste of her time. But, and I think this goes without saying, not everyone should own one of those things.

  53. 53
    Little Boots says:

    @dmsilev:

    every gadget, I’m sure. if she were a little older she’d be Ronco’s best customer ever. you just know it.

  54. 54
    The Other Chuck says:

    @wilfred:

    The harshest condemnations are leveled at those people and institutions we still have some respect for. McMegan’s self-indulgent twaddle is published by The Atlantic.

    Tho at this rate, I see it as complete fishwrap that Ta Nahesi Coates writes for for some inexplicable reason … probably because it’s hard to make a living at it and a steady job counts for something.

  55. 55
    dmsilev says:

    @The Other Chuck: It takes a bit of practice, but after a few cakes worth of separated eggs, using the shells to separate becomes pretty easy.

    I do recommend three bowls instead of two, though. One for the yolks, one for the white that you’re working on, and one for the accumulated whites. That way, if the yolk breaks and you get some into your whites, only one egg’s worth needs to have the yolk bits picked out.

  56. 56
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Little Boots: Dude.

  57. 57
    Raven says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: Beats me. If I didn’t hang around here I would have never have heard of her.

  58. 58
    Little Boots says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Dude is not (insert lawyer term)

    what is going to happen here?

  59. 59
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @ericblair:

    This is all just Ronco Egg-O-Matic shit made from shiny copper and sixty times the price.

    Awesome.

  60. 60
    The prophet Nostradumbass says:

    This is OT, but.. Guess who Penn State has hired to provide legal advice to the new university president.

  61. 61
    BGinCHI says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: I bet her husband wishes that FN were true every day.

  62. 62
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    She has a fucking electric kettle on the list?

  63. 63
    BGinCHI says:

    @Little Boots: Ayn Rand would obviously just laugh at Megan to begin with, since she’s withholding her productivity by doing such menial labor as cooking.

    Rand: “Isn’t there some dark-skinned person to do that?”

  64. 64
    chopper says:

    i’ll still make fun of her, but only so much since i’m buying a vitamix this weekend.

  65. 65
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @Special Patrol Group:

    She is so horrible.

    Yes she is. What a fucking snob.

  66. 66
    Little Boots says:

    @BGinCHI:

    in fairness, she would have her husband or her lover or one of her gay acolytes take care of that.

    but the important thing is:

    FREEDOM!

  67. 67
    trollhattan says:

    @The Other Chuck:

    Dangerous, even, given she has a, nay, several important platforms from which to spew galtian idiocy and somehow is considered a Serious Person by the crass and people of influence who simply don’t know better. They have Plans for her.

    A parallel could be drawn with Herr Gingrich who earned and fully deserves to live out the rest of his life in double-wide obscurity but, instead, is the leading Republican candidate for president.

    See what happens when you don’t keep on the pressure?

    As to Fair Sarah’s post, I took up smoking, briefly, after reading it, just because.

  68. 68
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @chopper: Let us know how your bechamel turns out.

  69. 69
    BGinCHI says:

    @Little Boots: Who could cook anyway when a young admirer is humping your leg?

    But enough about David Brooks…..

  70. 70
    chopper says:

    @Special Patrol Group:

    i know. all sorts of professional forschner-toting chefs are laughing their asses off.

  71. 71
    BGinCHI says:

    @trollhattan:

    double-wide obscurity

    If I was about to release a record of jangly country tunes, that’s what I’d call it.

  72. 72
    chopper says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    flawless! FLAWLESS!

  73. 73
    different-church-lady says:

    I’m thinking “David Brooks in a skirt” as a new category.

  74. 74
    JGabriel says:

    Sarah @ Top:

    Megan says that “Space is somewhat limited in our kitchen“ …

    Except that we already know from Megan’s video escapades that her kitchen is almost as big as the standard NYC studio — like for example, my apartment.

    Is there a phrase that describes obtuseness combined with malignant insensitivity? Does “evil fucking ditz” work?

    Edited to Add: “Fucking” to the “evil ditz” description.

    .

  75. 75
    fasteddie9318 says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: Not everybody should own one!

  76. 76
    Little Boots says:

    @BGinCHI:

    I now have an appalling picture in my head.

    but better than Alan Greenspan .. oh, god, I can’t even go on.

  77. 77
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @fasteddie9318:

    I hope she at least uses her thermonuclear blender, the one that not everyone should own lest they devalue its status and thus deprive her of the pleasure of owning it, to process the cheese into a sauce before she pours it over the rice.

    That, or Cheez Whiz.

  78. 78
    BGinCHI says:

    @JGabriel: I’d call it the Dry Noonan.

  79. 79
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Special Patrol Group: Although I risk abuse here, I got a set of good, very good, knives for Christmas last year and they are awesome. After cooking for 20+ years with shitty hand-me-down knives, I just love the good ones. Now, absent this topic or a question from someone about whether good knives make a difference in cooking, sit around and brag about them.

    ETA: Of course, I will also note that she equates expensive with good.

  80. 80
    Quarks says:

    I feel the need to draw attention again to her spelling, from the last comments. From McMegan’s post:

    “Extravagent Gestures”

  81. 81
    BGinCHI says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: Don’t apologize for that. Having a set of good knives is a must.

    You guys get Dark Horse beer up there? It’s a MI brewery.

  82. 82
    JGabriel says:

    @Me @ 74:

    Does “evil fucking ditz” work?

    Maybe we could call McMegan “EFD” for short?

    .

  83. 83
    Little Boots says:

    you risk abuse because you won’t answer my impossible question.. you’re a lawyer. make scottie go away, dammit.

  84. 84
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @beltane:

    That’s so cool. Garlic shaking looks like a good job for the kids.

    Tom Sawyer thought so.

  85. 85
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @BGinCHI: For some reason, I am off beer lately, so I haven’t noticed. My guess is Riley’s on Gorham Street has it. They have everything.

  86. 86
    Brad says:

    You’d think she could at least put hollandaise on her rice.

  87. 87
    Little Boots says:

    oh great, a teetotaler lawyer.

    dammit.

  88. 88
    BGinCHI says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: I just had an amazing cream stout by them. It’s called Too Cream Stout. If you get inclined and they have it, it’s damn good.

  89. 89
    different-church-lady says:

    @dmsilev: Motorized. You forgot motorized.

  90. 90
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Little Boots: Do you want to bankroll my expensive lifestyle and McMeganesque acquisition habit whist I do that? If not, then leave me be.

  91. 91
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @The prophet Nostradumbass:

    That is a combination of totally unbelievable and totally believable.

  92. 92
    JGabriel says:

    @Quarks:

    I feel the need to draw attention again to her spelling, from the last comments. From McMegan’s post: “Extravagent Gestures”

    I can’t really climb on that bandwagon, much as I’d like to. I’m a good speller in general, but I’m a lousy typist who, while typing and only while typing, drops words and makes homonym errors (your/you’re, there/their/they’re) all the time.

    So for me to criticize McMegan on that score might be a little too pot-kettle-black.

    .

  93. 93
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    Oh, by the way: the ads are for Le Cordon Bleu so I can become a “culinary chef.”

  94. 94
    Little Boots says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    if it gets rid of scottie, yes.

  95. 95
    Comrade Mary says:

    1) Garlic shaking works with typical white garlic with relatively loose skin. Purple garlic and some other varieties, while tasty, have tighter skins that will not be shaken off (see also: Sarah Palin and tv cameras).

    2) Electric kettles that fit into a base and which switch themselves off automatically are dead common in Canada. In fact, I saw one for less than ten bucks in a Canadian Tire today.

    3) Microplanes are unreservedly awesome at grating lemon zest, hard cheeses, garlic, nutmeg and fingertips. You have to freeze ginger root to make it grate well.

    And I can’t point and laugh at any other cook tonight because I just seriously sliced my right thumb when I took the slicing blade off the food processor by firmly grasping its large, extremely sharp edge. Oy.

  96. 96
    different-church-lady says:

    I must find myself a cocktail shaker I don’t wish to use for cocktails.

    Silver linings: they are silver.

  97. 97
    Little Boots says:

    you pissed at me, omnes? do not want that. I’m truly sorry if I did that.

  98. 98
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Little Boots: Dude, shouldn’t you be tormenting DougJ? I am drinking right now. I just said I am off beer.

  99. 99
    different-church-lady says:

    @Comrade Mary:

    3) Microplanes are unreservedly awesome at grating lemon zest

    Amen. A good $10 investment, especially when you have the need to rip off your signature fresh fig tart with rosemary cornmeal crust at a moment’s notice.

    Wait… Megan paid $45 for hers?

  100. 100
    Soonergrunt says:

    @JGabriel: That’s as may be, but one can download, free of charge, a web browser like Firefox that has a spell checker.
    Perhaps that’s the problem. Since it’s free, McMegan thinks it’s not good.

  101. 101
    Firebert says:

    For $1500, I can buy the mixer of my dreams, and have enough money left over for the refrigerator of my dreams.

  102. 102
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Little Boots: I will start forwarding my bills immediately. Some are due on Tuesday; please don’t let late fees accrue.

  103. 103
    Suffern ACE says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: While I can’t offer you a “revolving” account at Tiffany’s (the kind that you don’t have to actually pay back), how about a gift certificate to Bavaria? Maybe $25 per month as kind of a stipend?

  104. 104
    JGabriel says:

    @cathyx:

    No gourmand would eat rice with cheese melted on it.

    Risotto with Parmesan.

    Now in McMegan’s case we’re probably talking about Uncle Ben’s & American Process Cheese-like Food. But there are variations of rice w/melted cheese that many chefs might approve.

    .

  105. 105
    different-church-lady says:

    @Firebert: You need bigger dreams.

    I have kitchen appliance lust as much as anyone. But I like to think I would not waste my career in journalism indulging in it.

  106. 106
    Soonergrunt says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: Well throw a couple of commas his way. Give him something, or he’ll keep pestering you like the kid brother in A Christmas Story.

  107. 107
    beltane says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: Good knives are one of life’s pleasures, nothing to apologize for. In fact, a good set of knives eliminates the need for a lot of the unnecessary clutter that poseurs like McArdle rely on to perform simple tasks.

  108. 108
    SiubhanDuinne says:

    @Comrade Mary:

    I’ve never understood why electric kettles have never really caught on in the States the way, say, microwave ovens did. My kettle I think is from Canadian Tire (gift, years ago, from Owen Sound cousins) and I love it.

  109. 109
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Comrade Mary:

    dead common

    In the British sense, of course.

  110. 110
    Little Boots says:

    what’s up with you omnes?

  111. 111
    seabe says:

    I love your posts, Sarah. You’re a very witty and hilarious person.

  112. 112
    different-church-lady says:

    @seabe:

    I love your posts, Sarah. You’re a very witty and hilarious person.

    Well, she does also have the advantage of being fictional.

  113. 113
    RSA says:

    I’ll frequently make a pot of rice at night and melt some cheese on top, eat some for dinner, and the rest for breakfast.

    When I’m not up for real cooking, I’ll mix up some leftover rice and cheese with chopped jalapenos and maybe some chicken, put it between two tortillas, and toast it in a pan. Quesadillas are good comfort food.

    ETA: Oh, and I saw the spice rack that McCardle recommends just a couple of weeks ago in a store. (We have a few dozen spice bottles rattling around on a shelf.) I thought the rack was a plasticky piece of crap. But maybe that’s just me.

  114. 114
    different-church-lady says:

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    I’ve never understood why electric kettles have never really caught on in the States the way, say, microwave ovens did.

    Because you can’t reheat lasagna in an electric kettle.

  115. 115
    Soonergrunt says:

    @different-church-lady: So does McMegan.

    @different-church-lady: Well, you could, but it wouldn’t work very well.

  116. 116
    different-church-lady says:

    @Soonergrunt: If only.

    @Soonergrunt: I don’t want to know how you know that.

  117. 117
    Special Patrol Group says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Indeed, paying more for a knife does not make the blade any sharper. But McMegan couldn’t be bothered to learn what makes a blade hold an edge better (e.g., carbon steel knives are some which do–and aren’t usually comparatively expensive).

  118. 118
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @beltane: Plus, they make the most amazing guillotine-like sound as they slice through something and hit the wooden cutting board. Sometimes I cook things just so I can whack away with the knives. Yeah, I know; I am eight year old with better motor skills and credit cards.

    @Soonergrunt: The commas are mine, all mine.

  119. 119
    Suffern ACE says:

    @different-church-lady: Sure, if you want to be all “traditional” and serve it as a solid food.

  120. 120
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Little Boots: Quoi?

  121. 121
    The Other Chuck says:

    @SiubhanDuinne:

    Because we don’t drink tea.

  122. 122
    different-church-lady says:

    @Suffern ACE: I’m just thinking about what the next batch of tea might be like.

    Tomato sauce in a tea kettle… garlic in a cocktail shaker… man, you folks sure dig your savory beverages.

  123. 123
    Comrade Mary says:

    @different-church-lady: Oh, of course, it would be totally silly to reheat lasagna in a kettle.

    Now tortellini with spinach, that’s a whole different story …

  124. 124
    Little Boots says:

    kinda liking drunk omnes.

  125. 125
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Little Boots: Not drunk yet. Just halfway through a first drink. Just wait.

  126. 126
    Little Boots says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    uh, oh.

  127. 127
    different-church-lady says:

    @Comrade Mary: And that pretty much explains why I never use any of the hotel gadgets for my beverages.

    I bet the hotel charged him fifteen bucks six pounds fifty for the fork and bowl.

  128. 128
    Pongo says:

    She’s clearly trying too hard to convince herself and others that she is not ridiculous, but I think she may have talked herself out of a sale with this article. If anyone still thought there was a slim chance that she may really be culinary genius who, unlike the rest of us ramen-slurping schlubs, truly could distinguish between a $1500 miracle machine and a $100 Costco food processor, they have now been thoroughly disabused of that notion. Some of her ‘suggestions’ are just plain tacky and smack of uncontrollable impulse buying–pathological kitsch OCD, if you will–not discriminating taste and gourmet expertise.

    I don’t think she’s a snob, though, just a snob wanna be. She aspires to snobbery and deludes herself that she’s ‘made it’ by mimicking the super rich she idolizes. But articles like this demonstrate that she doesn’t truly understand snobbery. For one thing, she’s too self-aware about how ‘snobby’ she sounds. A true snob is not only completely ridiculous, they are also totally clueless about it (I refer you to Gwyneth Paltrow’s ‘GOOP’ site for a beautiful example of classic clueless snobbery). McMegan’s stuff is more like what a B or C lister imagines snobbery to be–kind of like the people who think they are opera lovers who appreciate classical music because they own an Il Divo CD.

  129. 129
    dmsilev says:

    @different-church-lady: The bagel shop near where I work has an electric bagel cutter, a widget which is to bagels as a rotary table saw is to wooden planks. Of course, they have a reasonable need for a device that can slice a bagel in about 1.5 seconds. McMegan would probably buy one just to spare herself the effort of pushing down on a blade…

  130. 130
    Tim in SF says:

    She’s an idiot and never right, but damn, she makes me yearn for that Thermomix. I will have one. Though it may take me a while.

  131. 131
    Scamp Dog says:

    @The Other Chuck: There’s also James Fallows. I don’t read him regularly, but he does some good stuff that I really enjoy.

  132. 132
    Little Boots says:

    she’s a Randroid, and therefore hopelessly self absorbed. it’s part of the religion. why are people surprised by this?

  133. 133
    Corey says:

    I know we’re supposed to be doing Two Minutes McMegan Hate, but I wouldn’t mind having most of this stuff.

    Jesus Christ, you people are ruthless.

  134. 134
    different-church-lady says:

    @Corey: The pig piles are a bit much at times, yes.

  135. 135
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Corey: Oh, we’ve all our own snobberies and delusions, but, Christ, I just hope I am not that appalling as I talk about them.

    Also, in many ways, it is not the things, it is the attitude about them.

  136. 136
    Little Boots says:

    hat?

  137. 137
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Little Boots: We obviously need a DougJ thread.

  138. 138
    Corey says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Also, in many ways, it is not the things, it is the attitude about them.

    Do you mean the burr vs. blade grinder thing? Because that actually really does make a difference. (Too cheap for a burr grinder myself, but have had a friends’, its the difference between home coffee and coffee shop coffee, as far as I’m concerned)

    I mean, whatever, there’s no call to be snobby, and yes McMegan is extremely ideologically blinkered. But it appears as though she actually enjoys cooking, and the stuff on this list is useful, if a little whiz-bangy, and I don’t really get the hate.

  139. 139
    Little Boots says:

    @Omnes Omnibus:

    Oh I’m just being a dick.

    do not take me seriously.

    I am really in awe of you. you really do know what is going on, and I like that.

  140. 140
    kindness says:

    Thankfully math didn’t seem to be involved in Megan’s piece. She uses a variety I don’t know.

  141. 141
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @Corey: Nah, it’s the defining oneself by one’s possessions. I might just own some of those things. I might want some of the others. I don’t, however, define my worth as a person by whether or not I have them.

  142. 142
    suzanne says:

    That spice rack she recommended sucks balls. TOTALLY inefficient. Alton Brown suggests little containers from the hardware store with stick-on Velcro on the inside of a cabinet door. Alton is awesome. McMegan is a dumbfuck.

  143. 143
    different-church-lady says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: In the end, the problem is not in the things: it’s in the prattling on about the things.

  144. 144
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @different-church-lady: Well stated.

  145. 145
    Anne says:

    Basically, they use evaporative cooling to keep your butter at room temperature without going rancid.

    Are you fucking kidding me? It’s an airtight seal. That’s it. The primary reason butter goes rancid is oxygen, and by keeping the O_2 to a minimum, you delay its descent into rancidity. I’ll grant that butter bells/boats/whatever are useful little things, but come the fuck on, it’s not “evaporative cooling.”

    I’m well aware that I’m an incurable food snob, but for the love of the FSM, I hope I’m not as insufferable as McMegan.

  146. 146
    JasperL says:

    I have to admit I have had a salt pig nearly identical to hers – no ears, though, thank Allah, and dark blue – for more than a decade, and love it. And I’ve had a very similar electric kettle longer than that, and would replace it the next day if the one I have broke. It heats water to a boil very fast, and if you go to make tea, and forget about it for an hour, no big deal.

    I peel garlic by putting them one at a time under the flat of a large knife, and just whacking the blade with my palm. Smashes the clove a bit, and the peel falls right off. But the idea of using a martini shaker is by far the best thing I learned today.

  147. 147
    nancydarling says:

    I have to confess to clicking on and skimming Megan’s list. I was just gob smacked by the realization that I have been making do without a kitchen twine dispenser for 40 years. I had no idea there was such a thing. Someone needs to give Megan Alice Waters’ “The Art of Simple Food” and see how a real pro does it with minimal tools. And Alice would never eat cold rice with cheese for breakfast, nor would I. I have been known to eat cold pizza for breakfast though.

  148. 148
    suzanne says:

    @different-church-lady: I am having a hard time at work because I now sit by a coworker who has McMegan beat by a country mile at the idiotic/self-absorbed/materialistic contest. She actually spent much of yesterday trying to convince me that she NEEDED another Louis Vuitton handbag. Not wanted. Needed. She is like nails on the chalkboard of my mind. I really cannot cpe with people like that.

    When I said that millions of people in Africa manage to get by without owning anything by Louis Vuitton, she said, “But they live differently than we do.”

    Head. Desk. Headdesk.

  149. 149

    @JasperL:

    And I’ve had a very similar electric kettle longer than that, and would replace it the next day if the one I have broke.

    Hell yeah. I use mine constantly.

  150. 150
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @nancydarling:

    I have been known to eat cold pizza for breakfast though.

    Horse of different color.

  151. 151
    The Fat Kate Middleton says:

    @The prophet Nostradumbass: Oh my Look at that list of clients:

    This retention puts Penn State in the same league as Lanny Davis’ other lovely clients, past and present, including:

    Now-deposed Ivory Coast “strongman” Laurent Gbagbo
    Brutal Equatorial Guinea President Teodoro Obiang Nguema Mbasogo (whom Davis is now suing for unpaid legal fees)
    The business-backed leaders of the 2009 military coup against Honduran President Manuel Zelaya
    The Coalition for Educational Success, an umbrella trade group for the exploitative for-profit college industry
    The corporate groups that derailed the Employee Free Choice Act, the top federal priority for labor groups following Barack Obama’s election
    Whole Foods!
    The Pakistani military
    The fanatically right-wing Israel Project

  152. 152
    a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q) says:

    @Little Boots: That Omnes dude has a position which makes answering questions such as you posed, even hypothetically, unwise. And I hear he’s sworn off beer for absinthe, as opposed to alcohol abstinence. Pure rumor, but still.

  153. 153
    gnomedad says:

    Is this her idea of damage control after being mocked about the Therminator?

    Also, is the pig an original Marcel duChamp?

  154. 154
    Scott Alloway says:

    Dearest Megan …
    Please find an old edition of The Joy of Cooking. Within said pages, it will guide through the cleaning, skinning and preparation of game and love stock (Been there, done that).
    Screw bechamel, hollandaise and bernaise sauces. Become a real cook.
    Machines to do the work? Get the hell outa my kitchen.
    Me? I’ve been cooking dinner for me and the Ms. for 31 years and counting (and Madam is a VERY fussy eater – even now, as I break from the Christmas cookies, she is fussing over the layers of powdered sugar o the three-eyes cookies).
    Much love,
    Scott

  155. 155
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q): He knows. He does it as torment. BTW it’s brandy this evening. I am think of getting some Calvados tomorrow.

  156. 156
    ThresherK says:

    @suzanne: I can’t imagine someone who professes to be a foodie, in public, being more in danger of kidnapping and relocation to Good Eats Boot Camp (would that there were such a place).

    Actually, she can start with Sandra Lee, and work her way up from there.

  157. 157
    nancydarling says:

    @gnomedad: She’s doubling down.

  158. 158
    a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q) says:

    @suzanne: Holy rollerskating fuck They live differently? Yeah, bitch – it’s the starvation lifestyle. Please put her out of my misery.

    kthnxbai

  159. 159
    Svensker says:

    @Pongo:

    (I refer you to Gwyneth Paltrow’s ‘GOOP’ site for a beautiful example of classic clueless snobbery)

    This was new to me. I found this gem:

    The absolute highlight of my trip was eating at Schwa. Chef Michael Carlson and his brother Seth who run it are so punk rock that they don’t even answer the phone, which makes getting a table difficult, yet weirdly fascinating.

    ETA: And how could I have missed the $250 shorts?

  160. 160
    FMguru says:

    All that specialized kitchen crap is just the anixous Nouveau Riche equivalent of the Slap Chop(tm) and other As Seen On TV products. Equally useless, but costing 50 times more. Amazing.

  161. 161
    different-church-lady says:

    @gnomedad: The original was lost after the Armory Show. This is an authorized reproduction.

  162. 162
    suzanne says:

    @ThresherK: Sandra Lee? No way. She can start with this fabulous recipe from Rachael Ray.

    My awful coworker is also named Rachael. Coincidence?

  163. 163
    different-church-lady says:

    @suzanne:

    She can start with this fabulous recipe from Rachael Ray.

    Sometimes I marvel over the fact that my Mr. Boston Platinum cocktail guide includes recipes for things such as Scotch and Water.

  164. 164
    suzanne says:

    @a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q): She and I sit at the front of the office. This afternoon, I got so annoyed that I went and sat in an empty station at the back. I could still hear her fucking obnoxious voice.

    @FMguru: The slap chop is awesome. It’s the only way I can chop onions.

  165. 165
    The prophet Nostradumbass says:

    @The Fat Kate Middleton: Quite a record, that, isn’t it?

  166. 166

    @suzanne:

    this fabulous recipe from Rachael Ray.

    Jesus. The end times really are upon us, aren’t they?

  167. 167
    suzanne says:

    @a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q): She’s so awful. She bragged to all of us (when we got our hours cut back) that she bought each of her sons and her husband their own Wiis. And expressed her joy that her husband is not paying adequate child support to the mother of his children from his previous marriage so that she can spend it all on her two little brats.

  168. 168
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @suzanne: You could, of course, drop a dime. Just saying, not necessarily recommending.

  169. 169
    suzanne says:

    @Omnes Omnibus: That’s tempting. Sorely.

  170. 170
    Omnes Omnibus says:

    @suzanne: “Won’t someone think of the children?”

  171. 171
    The Moar You Know says:

    I feel bad for McArdle, now. Her life is obviously shatteringly empty, miserable and utterly devoid of love. Things only ameliorate the void for a while, and she’s so hooked she has to keep upping the ante. Yeah, she’s got money and she’ll never know the meaning of want, but she can keep it. She has nothing else. That is fucking sad.

  172. 172
    FMguru says:

    @The Moar You Know: There’s a famous line from Slaughterhouse Five, where the narrator descibes his mother as “Like so many Americans, she was trying to construct a life that made sense from things she found in gift shops”. Megs is just that on a much larger scale (replace ‘gift shops’ with ‘the williams sonoma catalog’).

  173. 173
    No one of importance says:

    @cathyx: A gourmand would. A gourmet, non.

  174. 174
    Recall says:

    @nancydarling: Oddly, I just realized how much I need a plastic wrap dispenser.

  175. 175

    @beltane: A porcelain Fleshlight?

  176. 176
    The prophet Nostradumbass says:

    @No one of importance: Heh. Reminds me of something from Cheers, where Diane “compliments” Sam by telling him he’s a “regular Gourmand”.

  177. 177
    Ruckus says:

    @suzanne:
    I’m pretty sure billions of us get by without anything by Louis Vuitton. And some of us are even happier for it.

  178. 178

    @Comrade Mary:

    You have to freeze ginger root to make it grate well.

    Here’s an Alton Brown tip I have found works very well for grating ginger: wrap your box grater in plastic wrap. You’d think it would tear, but it doesn’t and then you unwrap it and all the ginger and juice is right there instead of stuck in the grater holes.

  179. 179
    furioso ateo says:

    I have to admit to not being a fan of Sarah, normally. But, Goddammit if this wasn’t the most excellent thing I read all day.

  180. 180
    Debbie(aussie) says:

    Thank you so much,I needed to lol.

  181. 181
  182. 182
    opie jeanne says:

    @Special Patrol Group: For such a fucking snob she pines for an ordinary set of cookware that can be had for a third the price of that Bechamel gadget.

  183. 183
    Yutsano says:

    @ThresherK:

    Actually, she can start with Sandra Lee, and work her way up from there.

    The ersatz First Lady of New York who is really a window decoration merchandiser?

  184. 184
    pseudonymous in nc says:

    though American kettles will never be as good as the ones in England

    This is sorta kinda true, in that there’s a bigger market, more choice, and mainly that the electricity is 240V, which is a big advantage for boiling water fast. But the Japanese have the bestest gadgety kettles.

    @Special Patrol Group:

    I didn’t see any disclaimer noting that she gets a piece of the action for anything ordered through her links to Amazon. She’s pulled that crap in years past and even updated her post after someone called her on it.

    I’m glad you noticed that. It’s definitely her personal affiliate code, going back to her Jane Galt days (yes, she’s been doing this forever) and while I don’t have a problem with amateur bloggers getting some affiliate pennies from Amazon, I do have a problem with it being done by someone who’s already fucking overpaid for her dreck.

  185. 185
    The Frito Pundito says:

    “rhythmically whirl, whirl, whirl her towards orgasm”
    That line made me spit out my $50/quart Danish milk out all over my $1000 Irish linen tablecloth.

  186. 186
    MonkeyBoy says:

    @Raven:

    There is nothing in the world wrong with a fat separator, nothing.

    I own one. It is one of those essential tools that rarely gets used and you have to hunt for it when you need it. I use it maybe 2 times a year for roasted turkeys and pot-roast type things. One alternative if you can spare a day is to put the fatty liquid in the fridge and remove the solidified fat from the top the next day. For large amounts of liquid the fridge technique is the best.

  187. 187

    Maybe it’s because I live in Korea, but re-heating cold rice for breakfast is something only alcoholics and the insane would do.

    Rice is _really_ easy to cook Megan — just make as much as you need.

  188. 188
    dance around in your bones says:

    I LOVE this place. O snark, where is thy sting?

    Why, right here on BJ!….just place 13 snarks in a martini shaker, agitate vigorously, and the laughs just separate, like whites from a yolk. Cost? Free, like a bird…I’mma holding up my lighter, lit with the fire of a thousand comments!

    :::gotta express my love before I pass out:::

  189. 189
    Djur says:

    I… think that salt cellar is cute.

  190. 190
    ThresherK says:

    @suzanne: Point taken.

    @Yutsano: She’s dating Andrew Cuomo? I did not know that.

    More words than I’ve ever actually thought of about R. Ray and S. Lee: I don’t pretend to choose between the two, especially since I have a household of two people, so I get to indulge in cooking without, say, feedback from a picky 6-y.o. (like I was once).

    But in the space of 21 minutes’ running time, I’m just too little of a dude to care about tablescaping. If I’m fixed in the room doing something important and the TV is also on, Rachel Ray may be working on something that just might catch my interest enough to stay tuned; Sandra Lee, never.

    And in the hurdle of “Have you ever looked up a recipe online after seeing it on TV”, neither.

  191. 191
    RobertB says:

    @Raven & MonkeyBoy: I’ll third the notion of the gravy separator being a Good Thing. Whatever sins I commit when making gravy, ‘Too greasy’ isn’t one of them.

  192. 192
    WereBear says:

    @SiubhanDuinne: We have an electric kettle, and I love it. Boils the water faster, especially small amounts, so it saves electricity, and if I forget about it, no harm done.

  193. 193
    Violet says:

    I realize I’m very late to this thread, but my inability to look away from trainwrecks caused me to click over to McMegan’s post. When skimming the comments I caught this from her:

    i’ll be on book leave this spring

    Oh goody. I guess that means we’ve got a book tour to look forward to.

  194. 194
    Jennifer says:

    For garlic, get yourself a handy little invention called the garlic twist. Put the peeled cloves in it, twist the two sides back and forth until you get it minced to the size you want, and that’s it. Plus it cleans really easily. I use mine for mincing ginger, too – I just cut it into smaller pieces beforehand.

    On the subject of the best spice rack, I had my BIL build one for me – I can’t describe it without a picture – but it’s wood and has a series of 4 shelves, stepping up (the bottom shelf is the longest, the next up is the next longest, and so on) and it sits on the countertop up against the edge of the refrigerator cabinet. Then I bought some watchmaker’s cases for spice containers, and printed off labels for them on the computer. Then I filled them up with bulk spices from the local health food store. People ask all the time where I got it. I actually stole the idea from a Martha Stewart catalog, but unlike hers, mine didn’t cost $150, so it wouldn’t do it for McMegan.

  195. 195
    Commenting at Ballon Juice since 1937 says:

    I think the ‘salt pig’ is really intended to hold cocaine.

  196. 196
    Special Patrol Group says:

    @pseudonymous in nc:

    It isn’t so much that she’s getting a piece of the action, although as you note, she’s the last to deserve it as she’s a paid blogger–and a horrible one at that. The real problem is that she didn’t mention it. Again. Some might say that she has an ethics problem.

  197. 197
    Pongo says:

    @dance around in your bones: I guess if we were nice people we would be ashamed of ourselves for picking on someone who clearly has a disability–KKT (‘kitchen kitsch tourette’s’), a tragic impulse buying disorder characterized by total lack of discretion coupled with zero self-awareness. Thankfully, we aren’t nice people.

  198. 198
    Bluecrab says:

    Man… so glad I stumbled onto this… it’s even better than that defunct website with all of the Rachael Ray haters. Megan McCardle is truly insufferable. I think she knows about as much about cooking as she does about economics.

  199. 199
    opie jeanne says:

    I just took a look at a video of McMegan’s kitchen, from when she told us how tedious baking used to be, and she has too much crap in that kitchen. I thought I was bad but she’s got me beat by a mile.

    And her cabinets make me think she has no taste.

  200. 200
    The Other Chuck says:

    @Jennifer:

    For garlic, get yourself a handy little invention called the garlic twist

    Oh is that what they’re calling bud grinders now? I’ve got a “garlic twist” sitting next to my rolling papers.

  201. 201
    sukabi says:

    Cheese and rice for dinner and breakfast, no wonder she writes like she’s full of shit… probably hasn’t been able to take one for the last decade as her colon has become the home of a large, solid brick.

    and btw, if she’d quit spending her money on expensive kitchen gadgets she likely only uses once or twice, she’d have the money to actually buy some food that isn’t cheese or rice… (wonder if she gets hers at the local food pantry… gov surplus cheese & butter)

  202. 202
    Hewer of Wood, Drawer of Water says:

    Late to this too, but what got me when I mistakenly clicked on the link was that there was a “number of people who are not-so-subtly chivvying me to get this up early so they can get a jump on their shopping.” For the love of FSM, are there people so vapid that they need to rely on McArgleBargle to tell them what salt pig or twine dispenser to buy. Sweet Jeebus, save us all

  203. 203
    dance around in your bones says:

    @Pongo:

    KKT (‘kitchen kitsch tourette’s’), a tragic impulse buying disorder characterized by total lack of discretion coupled with zero self-awareness.

    This is just classic, and has been immediately added to my private lexicon. Grazi!

  204. 204
    saltpig says:

    Salt pigs are convenient, but if she knows her salt and is using anything that actually has flavor, she wouldn’t leave it in an open-air container like that. Salt absorbs moisture from the air and it will begin to break down and lose it’s flavor pretty quickly in open air containers, not to mention dust and dirt that will settle on it in a busy kitchen.

  205. 205
    Mister Papercut says:

    @beltane:

    McMegan’s salt pig looks vaguely NSFW though I am having trouble determining which orifice it resembles the most.

    :lightbulb: The Goatse Salt Dispenser. Why hasn’t this (presumably) happened yet, Internet?

  206. 206
    Pongo says:

    @Svensker: Is she not the master of snobbish absurdity? And the depth of her total cluelessness about how absurd she is just makes it that much more inadvertently entertaining. These are heights of pompous inaccessibility McMegan can only dream of. She wants to count herself among this glitzy club, but, as the saying goes, ‘we know Gwyneth Paltrow and you, Ms. McArdle, are no Gwynnie.’

    Besides I think McMegan totally stole the pink Himalayan sea salt thing from Gwyneth, so she must be a devotee of GOOP. Of course, the difference is that Gwynnie probably actually traveled to the Pink Himalayan Sea for her version and would be mortified to have to settle for the tacky Williams-Sonoma version.

  207. 207
    Marc says:

    @Sarah Proud and Tall:

    The reviews of that recipe are very funny.

  208. 208
    Jamie says:

    Oh, god, this person holds a sinecure at the Atlantic, claims to be a sophisticated foodie, and is still eating failed experiments from cheap college food?

    Starch and fat combos come in such better combinations. Don’t get me wrong – I eat a lot of rice, and I also eat a lot of cheese. Does the Thermotron 9000 have a setting for that? Does it also rehumidify stolen bagels from the dining hall?

    I’m not trying to be proud here. My easy food is bean soup, with whatever is on hand, or more commonly buying a burrito on the way home for $5. But I graduated from chipped beef gravy on toast in my early 20s.

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