Headlines I saw today…

Two headlines I saw today reminded me how truth finds a way to bubble to the surface. One was from a ‘real’ newspaper and the other was from The Onion. And yet both seemed to reveal some obvious truths about our current politics.

headlines in the news, 5-23-11

And with that, let’s have an Open threaad.

Cheers






36 replies
  1. 1
    fasteddie9318 says:

    http://www.washingtonpost.com/....._blog.html

    Camping says May 21 was “invisible Judgment Day,” and the world is ending on October 21.

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  2. 2
    Spaghetti Lee says:

    @fasteddie9318:

    “Well, wouldja look at that! I had my calendar upside-down!”

  3. 3
    GregB says:

    Leave Brother Camping alone!

    Also too, Tepco admits that two other reactors melted down.

    Move along.

  4. 4
    eemom says:

    I read the news today, oh boy……

  5. 5
    fasteddie9318 says:

    I hope his idiot sheep sell off whatever they haven’t already sold off in advance of the New and Improved Double-Secret Probation End of the World.

  6. 6
    eemom says:

    @fasteddie9318:

    ummm……how many strikes does the apocalypse get before it’s out?

  7. 7
    freelancer says:

    @fasteddie9318:

    I heard part of Camping’s press conference live on local familyradio. He said that “a spiritual rapture” happened on Saturday. The “real” one will be in 5 months as you said. And on October 22nd, he’ll find a new place to put the goalposts. What a loon.

    As Marc Maron would say, he’s doing the big work. It just happens to be all upstairs in his head.

  8. 8
    Gex says:

    @fasteddie9318: Whoever invented God really did a number on humanity.

  9. 9
    Villago Delenda Est says:

    My question for Governor Pawlenty is:

    So, are you going to tell us the truth about maintenance for the I-35 bridge?

  10. 10
    fasteddie9318 says:

    @freelancer:

    What a loon.

    He’s not the loon. He’s the guy getting paid by the loons.

  11. 11
    fasteddie9318 says:

    @Villago Delenda Est:

    So, are you going to tell us the truth about maintenance for the I-35 bridge?

    Simple; in his passion for America, T-Paw humped that bridge until it fell apart at the seams.

  12. 12
    Gex says:

    @fasteddie9318: $100mil in the last seven years. He’s a genius.

  13. 13
    BO_Bill says:

    The I-35 bridge has been fixed. You can drive on it now.

  14. 14
    S. cerevisiae says:

    I can picture some newspaper editor laughing his head off. Pawlenty’s campaign belongs on the obituary page, he would not even win Minnesota. Colbert put it best; “he looks like he’s made out of manilla envelopes”

  15. 15
    Matt Mangels says:

    Maybe this is unnecessarily pessimistic, but sometimes I imagine the Israel/Palestine situation as being akin to one of those problems from Algebra class where the answer is “No Solution”

  16. 16
    freelancer says:

    @Gex:

    Goddamnit, why do I have to have these things called scruples?

  17. 17
    Gex says:

    @freelancer: I know. While we struggle because my GF has been out of work since 2008, I could have been working my way towards being rich enough to buy a NFL franchise.

  18. 18
    El Cid says:

    During the Bush Jr. years, I learned that The Onion was a valuable guide to what the regime would be doing soon.

    I just wasn’t sure if it was the Onion‘s prescience at play, or whether the Bush Jr. administration read the ‘paper’ for guidelines and ideas.

    Just as they seemed to have read 1984 as an instruction manual.

  19. 19
    Suffern ACE says:

    @Gex: Yep. And great job security, too. Jack van Impe has been scaring the crap out of his faithful viewers for over 30 years. You’d think his audience would notice tat the same verses are used over and over again to predict the end, but they don’t.

  20. 20
    Mitch Daniels says:

    This post is funny. I wanted to laugh, but my wife won’t let me.

  21. 21
    freelancer says:

    @Mitch Daniels:

    She might come back and change her mind. Give it like a thousand days or so.

  22. 22

    why couldn’t t’pau just call his campaign
    heart and soul

    because for republicans its always 1987

  23. 23
    TenguPhule says:

    Maybe this is unnecessarily pessimistic, but sometimes I imagine the Israel/Palestine situation as being akin to one of those problems from Algebra class where the answer is “No Solution”

    And it would still be the only correct answer.

    As shitty as the current Israeli ruling regime is, they only got into that power thanks to the even worse fuckers leading the Palestinians in their grand revolt against movie theatres and ice cream parlors.

  24. 24
    Joey Maloney says:

    @TenguPhule:

    As shitty as the current Israeli ruling regime is, they only got into that power thanks to the even worse fuckers leading the Palestinians in their grand revolt against movie theatres and ice cream parlors other Israeli parties.

  25. 25
    TenguPhule says:

    other Israeli parties.

    Ah, so its lets call Hamas and the PLO Israeli parties day?

  26. 26
    Calouste says:

    @eemom:

    DougJ wouldn’t have passed up on that one.

  27. 27
    Yutsano says:

    @TenguPhule: @Joey Maloney: Sadly enough, you’re both right. Plenty of blame to go round in this mishegas. And we haven’t been helping by being Israel’s enablers.

  28. 28
    Joey Maloney says:

    @TenguPhule: Tzipi Livni is the only one who’s worth more than a pint of piss, and even she is just an opportunist.

    In addition to the structural problems with forming a governing coalition – you can’t have one without being beholden to parties that make the US Republicans look tolerant, inclusive, and reality-based – elections are by party list, not by individual candidates. So you can’t win a Knesset seat without being beholden to the party power structure, which means in the major parties being thoroughly compromised and at least tolerant of if not an active part of the endemic corruption.

    Hamas and Fatah could be run by Zombie Martin Luther King Jr. and Zombie Gandhi at this point, and the Israeli government would be incapable of a rational, self-interested response. Any policy other than “make the sand niggers miserable enough and maybe they’ll go away” can’t survive a no-confidence vote.

    And it’s not just the Palestinians who are getting fucked by this. They get the worst, of course, but more and more repressive, anti-democratic measures are being taken against Jewish Israelis who agitate for change. Think, Kansas state legislature, except with nukes.

  29. 29
    Baron Jrod of Keeblershire says:

    @TenguPhule: Why can’t you people understand that Israel is blameless? It’s all the dirty towel-heads! All them!!!! Every last speck of blame belongs to them!

  30. 30
    Chris says:

    @Joey Maloney:

    Hamas and Fatah could be run by Zombie Martin Luther King Jr. and Zombie Gandhi at this point, and the Israeli government would be incapable of a rational, self-interested response.

    I suspect they’d be far more terrified if the Palestinians went Gandhi/MLK on them, and for the same reason if the Arab world went democratic: their last claim to the moral high ground would be lost, and they’re afraid it would cost them support in the West.

    Come to think of it, I think they’ve imprisoned plenty of people they were afraid might be the Palestinian Gandhi/MLK.

    Meanwhile, Hamas got Israeli financing on its way up, as Fatah does today. Go figure.

  31. 31
    cleek says:

    @eemom:

    how many strikes does the apocalypse get before it’s out?

    a couple hundred, apparently.

  32. 32
    Kirbster says:

    The T-Paw announcement on the obituary page — priceless!

    Am I the only one who pictures the end of his campaign being a YouTube viral video of him looking ridiculous riding in an Army tank wearing an oversized insectile helmet to demonstrate his “strong on defense” bona fides?

  33. 33
    SonofMog says:

    Amazing. Ian Murphy infiltrates Jane Corwin’s campaign. Found via TPM. Same guy who prank called Scott Walker; he’s the Green in the NY-26 election. This guy is my hero.

  34. 34
    liberal says:

    @Matt Mangels:

    sometimes I imagine the Israel/Palestine situation as being akin to one of those problems from Algebra class where the answer is “No Solution”

    You’re asking the wrong question. The question is, what is policy that would be in the best interest of the US?

    There’s a very simple solution: cutoff all aid to Israel (and the Palestinians), wish both sides the best, and let them solve their own problems.

  35. 35
    Paul in KY says:

    @Chris: I’ve posted before (Salon, maybe) that if the Palestinians could manage to go Ghandi on them for about 4 or 5 years, it would help them get their nation much more than warfare with Israel has (so far).

    I think it would bring U.S. opinion back to the side of the Palestinians.

  36. 36

    @GregB:
    Pssst. If there’s a partial meltdown, you can’t even tell at the time, and you successfully shut down the reactor… that meltdown was meaningless.

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