Penguin Lust

This is too much:

I propose that whenever something is just over-the-top squee we refer to it as “tickling the penguin.”

72 replies
  1. 1
    Yutsano says:


    Did you know penguins have no natural fear of humans in the wild? Apparently all the predators that can threaten them (as adults anyway) are in the water, so anything in the solids is regarded as a curiosity. Which is why you can have naturalists stand in the middle of a flock of pengies and they just go whatevs. Such neat lil birds.

  2. 2
    Nate says:

    Lust is an appropriate term given what that penguin is actually doing to that zookeeper’s hand…

  3. 3
    kdaug says:

    Without objection, the motion is so ordered.

    “Tickling the penguin” it is.

    (Do remember to add it to the lexicon, though. Most people will have no fucking idea what it means.)

  4. 4
    Yutsano says:

    BTW does this mean pictures of teh SamKitteh will also henceforth be referred to as “tickling the penguin”?

  5. 5
    sukabi says:

    I propose that whenever something is just over-the-top squee we refer to it as “tickling the penguin.”

    is a FINE sentiment, however there are those who define “squee” in a much different way, and will turn “Tickling the penguin” into something employing ball-gags, wetsuits and the poor…

  6. 6
    JenJen says:

    Hmmm. This might be a good strategy for Tampa Bay when they take on your Pens tonight, Cole.

  7. 7
    Raenelle says:

    That video makes it into my “cutest things I’ve ever seen” set. Naming that set “tickling the penguin” is a damned good idea.

  8. 8
    ABL says:

    “tickling the penguin” sounds like it would involve a feather duster and a sturdy set of testicles.

  9. 9
    Rosalita says:

    Those little Blue pengies are teh cutest!

  10. 10
    John Cole says:

    @sukabi: And Rule #34 is invoked by the fifth comment.

  11. 11
    Yutsano says:

    @JenJen: Well I admit I’d tickle Sidney Crosby. There I said it. :)

    @John Cole: Inevitable as the tide, mi amici. Inevitable as the tide. Bill O is on that case I hear.

  12. 12
    Alex S. says:

    I need someone to tickle my penguin.

  13. 13
    MattR says:

    So this is why we still read Andrew Sullivan?

  14. 14
    TaMara (BHF) says:

    My cats generally ignore computer sounds, even the occasional cat video. But when I played this they all went onto high alert. I’m guessing that is actually a penguin distress call and my guys were all in for penguin dinner.

  15. 15
    Loneoak says:

    @TaMara (BHF):

    My dog Turnip hated it, too.

    Edit: btw, Turnip is the one laying in a pile of pink flowers in this month’s BJ pet calendar.

  16. 16
    JCT says:

    Nothing like an instant grin.

    OK, you guys — turning something so cute into something salacious?

    I’ve been chuckling over this since yesterday — sent it to my kid (who was studying in the stacks at the time) and she apparently disturbed her whole library block with it.

  17. 17
  18. 18
    Yutsano says:

    @Tsukune: Nothin’ but urges from Hayull!!

    (Gawd I lurved that sequence. That man needs to keep drawing until time ends.)

  19. 19
    R-Jud says:

    Aaaaaand the Bean now knows a new word: “peng-in!”

  20. 20
    Alex S. says:

    @John Cole:

    I thought it was already invoked in the headline.

  21. 21
    Xantar says:

    Point of order!

    I believe over-the-top-squee has already been previously defined as “surprised kitty.”

  22. 22
    TaMara (BHF) says:

    Remind me of Rule #34 again…I’m hoping it’s something dirty.

  23. 23
    Parallel 5ths (Jewish Steel) says:

    Sorry if this has already been posted but this piece of the Obama puzzle has been brought to my attention.

    Not only Muslim with a Kenyan SS# but also a pirate! Too!


  24. 24
    D-Chance. says:

    Now, it becomes obvious why Governor Brewer vetoed the so-called “birther” bill in Arizona… she wanted to go to one of those DC Insiders cocktail parties.

  25. 25
    Violet says:

    Oh my gosh that is the cutest thing.

  26. 26
    Tsulagi says:

    Want to double down on the cute? Someone sent me this vid of a merengue dancing girl dog. This dog dances latin better on two legs than a lot of humanoids.

  27. 27
    Punchy says:

    tickling the penguin

    Is that some new treatment for Crosby’s concussion?

  28. 28
    Captain Goto says:

    “It’s natural and beautiful!! I, for one, fully support PENGUIN LUST ! ! ! ”

    “Fine. But this editorial was about ‘nun-beating’.”

    “Good lord, man…I can’t support THAT.”


  29. 29
  30. 30
  31. 31
    Violet says:

    @Parallel 5ths (Jewish Steel):
    That photo of little Bar-aaaaargh-ck is adorable. Love the little mustache.

  32. 32
    icedfire says:

    @TaMara (BHF): Rule 34 is the premise that for everything that exists, there is porn on the internet exploiting it.

  33. 33
    mclaren says:

    @TaMara (BHF):

    Remind me of Rule 34 again…

    If you can imagine it, there is porn of it on the internet.

  34. 34
    Legalize says:

    That’s what she said.

  35. 35
    JPK says:

    That is just adorable.

  36. 36
    Martin says:

    @Violet: Adorable?! He’s obviously here to loot our country and steal our shit!

  37. 37
    JPL says:

    @Loneoak: Turnip is a cute pup.

  38. 38
    Anoniminous says:

    Between reading Yet Another blog post on the continuing series of the latest Tea-Bagging stupidity/disaster/racism/etc. or how Obama is/is not whatever

    and seeing someone tickle a penguin …

    I’ll take the penguin.

  39. 39
    Just Some Fuckhead says:

    When penguins get really hungry, they look at you and imagine that you are a can of tuna and then they attack.

    I know because I saw it in a cartoon.

  40. 40
    New Yorker says:


    I was wondering if the post title was a deliberate reference to Oral Bill’s crusade against penguin lust.

  41. 41

    That’s exactly the noise that Ann Coulter makes when she orgasms.

    Go on, listen to it again with your eyes closed and try to get THAT visual out of your head.

    I’ll give you cute and fucking fluffy.

  42. 42
    Comrade Mary says:

    Yeah, that is a bucket of squee, right there. I also suggest that “tickling the penguin” not just go into the lexicon, but that it becomes a tag, also, too, SQUEE!

    The full video. His name was Cookie, he was a showgirl.

  43. 43
    Comrade Mary says:

    @Sarah, Proud and Tall: And one of these days you’re going to tell us how you know that. I await the details with a mix of dread and — well, just dread. Lots of dread.

  44. 44
    Belafon (formerly anonevent) says:

    @Kristine: I love how the urban dictionary devolved into an argument over how much it could apply.

  45. 45
    Fe E says:


    I know that is true for Antarctic Penguins–especially the Adelies they are just fearless out of the water. And very curious too and cute as all-get-out as well.

    I don’t know about African penguins though, they may have learned to be wary of onshore predators.

  46. 46
    Svensker says:

    @Parallel 5ths (Jewish Steel):


    I gotta say, if Joe Beese & Co don’t egg me, that that picture is Tickle-the-Penguin squee worthy, as well.

  47. 47
    sukabi says:

    @John Cole: wasn’t invoking “p0rn” was invoking Republicans… but YMMV

  48. 48
    JustPeachyAndYou says:

    Cutest damn thing I’ve seen this week. The obgligate carnivore in my lap wanted to eat it.

  49. 49
    satby says:

    shit, thanks Cole. Now I want one.

  50. 50
    twiffer says:

    hehe. already saw that, courtesy of TMBG. did not drive the kitten nuts, probably because she’s off napping somewhere else. or chasing a particularly wily pit of paper.

  51. 51
    donnah says:

    My teenage son watched it again with me and said, “Well, now we have to get a penguin”.

    Teh squee is a good thing to have during these troubled times.

  52. 52
    JCT says:

    @Sarah, Proud and Tall: OK, Sarah, that is up there with Chris Christie in a thong.


  53. 53
    Jay in Oregon says:

    With a tip of the hat to First Draft…

    Raw Story has an article about WI state senator Randy Hopper — you know, the guy who left his wife and moved out of his district to shack up with his 25-year-old mistress — publishing a phone number for his constituents to call. That phone number redirects to an adult chat line.

  54. 54
    Jay in Oregon says:

    @Sarah, Proud and Tall:

    …damn you.

    DAMN YOU TO HELL! Where’s the brain bleach when you need it!?!

  55. 55
    Paul in KY says:

    Like to wish all the BJers a happy 4/20.

    Smoke a penguin if ya got one!

  56. 56
    JGabriel says:

    Of course the penguin looks cute. Everyone looks good in a tux. Ask Dietrich.


  57. 57
    Valdivia says:

    god that is Teh Cute.

  58. 58
    ET says:

    New for the Lexicon!!

  59. 59
    trollhattan says:

    @Sarah, Proud and Tall:

    Nuh-uh, I don’t hear anything that sounds like a neck being stabbed.

  60. 60
    srv says:

    Tim Hetherington, director-photographer of Restrepo, KIA in Libya.

  61. 61
    Just Some Fuckhead says:

    @srv: KIA? More like MBM (Massacred by Mercs)

  62. 62

    @Sarah, Proud and Tall:

    the vocalization is correct, of course anne coulter has a much, much deeper semitone projecting from her diaphragm.

  63. 63
    trollhattan says:


    Just read that. Damn.

  64. 64
    gastropoda says:

    I contend that penguin is not giggling but shrieking. Penguins were not designed to be tickled by humans for Youtube consumption. Sorry to be a downer.

  65. 65
    flukebucket says:

    Sorry to see Balko no longer on the blogroll. I found Balko thru Balloon-Juice back in ’04 and I had hoped that one day he might be a front pager over here. But who knows. Hearts and minds are changing.

  66. 66
    josephdietrich says:

    The actual original video can be found here.

  67. 67
    Waratah says:

    This made me doubly envious of my sister who in a couple of weeks will be in Melbourne going to the King Tut exhibition and seeing the fairy penguins.

  68. 68
    Lysana says:

    Considering the penguin was actively going to get the pettings, had clearly sought them before based on the video commentary, and stayed put after it was over, I don’t think it was being tortured. @gastropoda:

  69. 69
    kimalanus says:

    You ain’t seen squee ’til you’ve seen this squee…. SFW

  70. 70
    Paul in KY says:

    @gastropoda: Why does the penguin stay & not try to get away?

  71. 71
    Satchel says:

    Courtesy of Annwn, a Celtic band that used to play in the San Francisco Bay Area:

    “Penguin Lust” mp3:


    See also Lyle Lovett’s “Penguins”:

  72. 72
    Jay in Oregon says:

    Regarding the use of the word “squee”:

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