…. With a side of poorly-thought-out BDSM. Dana Milbank brings news of how “Republican freshmen in House shut down compromise, and possibly the government“:
… A band of the first-term members of Congress demonstrated their legislative maturity Wednesday by announcing, in a news conference outside the Capitol, that they wished to deliver a message to Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid. But rather than merely send him an e-mail or hire a courier, the lawmakers instead marched up the East Front steps and presented themselves at a seldom-used ceremonial door.
Being a ceremonial door, it was locked and alarmed — and so the freshmen used two strips of their blue tape to affix the letter, enclosed in a large manila envelope with the words “MR. REID” handwritten in four-inch letters.
“We’re doing our job in the House of Representatives,” announced Rep. Vicky Hartzler (R-Mo.), a member of the blue-tape brigade. “We put forth a proposal that would cut $61 billion . . . and yet Senator Reid won’t even, uh, consider that. That is dereliction of duty.”
Actually, Congresswoman, the derelict Reid did bring that proposal to a vote in the Senate — and it failed, 56 to 44.
The only difference between these jenkem-huffing Rethugs and the sweaty data analysts in elf-garb carpooling to the state park for a weekend of chasing each other around with sticks is that most Live-Action-Role-Players have a sense of humor about their hobby. Oh, yeah, and the LARPers aren’t getting paid by the taxpayers to strut a series of complicated imaginary personas.
Reid can afford to be serene. The March Washington Post-ABC News poll finds the public would blame Republicans over President Obama for a shutdown, 45 percent to 31 percent. Just a couple of weeks earlier, they were even.
To overcome this, House Republican leaders announced a novel solution: They would suspend the Constitution to have the House enact a law without the agreement of the Senate. They will pursue this exotic maneuver on Friday — April Fool’s Day.
Majority Leader Eric Cantor, announcing this “Prevention of Government Shutdown Act,” told reporters that if the Senate “does not act, H.R. 1” — that’s the $61 billion of cuts favored by Republican freshmen — “becomes the law of the land.” Just like that!
After several questions about this proposal, Cantor admitted that for his scheme to work, the Senate would first have to agree to surrender its constitutional authority.
There was also something about “winged monkeys flying out of the questioner’s posterior”, but that doesn’t seem to have been captured on the video.
I don’t think Roy Edroso’s seminal “Evil vs. Stupid Axis” is adequate to fully describe the new balls-to-the-wall FAILPARADE that is modern Republicanism. I propose a new Golden Triangle: Mean, Dumb, and Crazy. Start drawing those diagrams now… or, if you’re a federal employee, wait until April 8, ’cause you may have some extra time on your hands then.