Now that Lady Starburst has been deemed insufficiently serious to lead the Party of Lincoln, it’s pretty clear that we’re in for another GOP daddy as the presidential nominee in 2012. I believe it will be either Hunky Prairie Daddy John Thune or Folksy Fiscal Daddy Mitch Daniels.
I saw Wolf Blitzer interviewing Daniels yesterday. Blitzer hit Daniels with an excerpt of this quote from David Leonhardt of the Times:
As President George W. Bush’s first budget director, Mr. Daniels badly underestimated the cost of the Iraq war, a war that ended up costing hundred of billions of dollars and became a major source of the Bush deficits. He argues that the criticism of him on this point is unfair, because he was asked to estimate only the cost of the brief occupation that military planners expected, not to estimate the length of the occupation that would be needed.
That strikes me as a marginally reasonable defense. I think the bigger question is why, as budget director, he did not try to prevent the Bush administration from turning a big surplus into a huge deficit — not just through the war, but through tax cuts and other policies, too. If he runs for president, that question deserves to be a big part of the vetting of Mr. Daniels by the media, his opponents and the voter.
Daniels didn’t really answer this, he evaded and gave a folksy smile, and said something like “we weren’t perfect but a sight better than they’re doing today”. Total bullshit, since we’re in a bad recession now and weren’t then, but as a line of bs goes, it’s probably good enough for government work, especially in this media environment.
Of the Republican candidates, Daniels scares me the most. I can see the Village rallying him hard and all that cornfed charm goes over well in the midwest, which may be the most important battleground in 2012.
LarsThorwald
Concur completely, but Thune gives me concern as well.
shortstop
Mitch Daniels is 5’3″.
I don’t make the rules of wacky American voter prejudice. I just pass them along.
Ash Can
I dunno, if Time and Blitzer are up to hitting him with his own crap, then I doubt he’s the anointed one. Thune is more of an empty suit — er, a blank slate, and the corporate masters may still be backing Romney.
Brachiator
The 2011 predictions issue of The Economist thinks that Mittens Romney and Newter Gingrich will take a shot, but fade early, that Rogue Palin will wait until the last minute to throw her charisma around, and then settle for a role as vengeful power-broker. But, like you, they see Daniels as a possibly strong challenger. Along with Jeb Bush, who might be able to bring together both the religious base and the old school elitists and Wall Street power brokers.
Just Some Fuckhead
@shortstop:
Jesus, that’s positively Reichesque.
Davis X. Machina
Someone we’re not talking about will get the GOP nomination, because by july 2012 it won’t be worth shit.
NobodySpecial
Haley Barbour had better favorable/unfavorables when this question was polled back in November. Plus Haley satisfies the old colored-hating white guy demographic that’s key to any successful GOP nomination.
John PM
@Davis X. Machina:
If, as Andrew Sullivan keeps saying, Obama is the Democrats’ Reagan, then perhaps we could get Michelle Bachmann and then have another Minnesota politician get thumped 49-2. We can only hope.
cleek
4 years ago, it was absolutely going to be Hillary v Rudy.
El Cid
At least Daniels is knowledgeable about estimating future issues affecting the costs of retirement and Social Security and Medicare, and how we’ll soon be able to save massive amounts of money.
From that same Leonhardt Q&A.
Fuck, yeah. Finally we can keep those poor classes working until the century mark and at the same time creating an entire new market of credits and loans by businesses so that the New Olds can mortgage replacement body parts.
Sue
They’re already beginning to preen for the true believers. I’ll bet Michelle Bachmann is furious that she hasn’t been invited to this one:
http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2011/01/twelve-potential-gop-candidates-invited-to-iowa-social-conservative-forum.php?ref=fpc
JCT
I’m just not seeing a really short guy (imagine the debate visuals) who was Bush’s budget guy (imagine those line charts) and who’s grandparents were born in SYRIA (imagine the wingnut’s heads EXPLODING) being elected in 2012.
No.
Oh and as El Cid points out — that idiotic replaceable body part stuff should go over real well. Hmmmm, sounds like you might need STEM CELLS to make those magical new parts. Ruh-roh.
shortstop
@NobodySpecial: Has anything happened since November? Anything like, I dunno, Barbour publicly defending the corporate wing of the KKK?
The GOP has gotten only marginally less racist in the last 40 years. What is has gotten is unwilling to be open about it. With his looks and history, Barbour never had a chance outside the South even before he made verbal love to the CCC.
DougJ
@cleek:
I don’t think it’s absolutely anyone, but I think Daniels and Thune are the most likely.
LGRooney
So, is he lazy or incompetent? The military planners that suggested a desert quickie were mostly political hacks whereas the serious military planners knew better (and some lost their jobs for letting out the truth). Knowing that, was he too lazy to do anything more than the simple tasked requested or was he incompetent in that he never looked into contingencies?
Or, perhaps, was he too much of a coward to let it be known that the WH was skewing everything in favor of an attack and, although he had done the contingency budget planning and although American lives were on the line, he kept his mouth shut like a good patriot?
Martin
Insufficiently serious? No, she’s toxic in the general, but I wouldn’t bet against her in the primary with the right campaign team.
The only reason we’re hearing so much about guys like Daniels is that the semi-adults in the GOP are pissing their pants that 2012 will look like a national DE-Sen race.
Since the rise of the tea party, finding a candidate that can navigate both the GOP primary and the general election is going to be really goddamn hard.
david mizner
Village is already pushing him hard. Check out this verbal hand job.
I get I don’t have to tell you who wrote it:
“Back in Washington, the luxury of having a thoughtful presidential contender was striking for everyone hearing Daniels. The onetime Reagan White House political director and Bush White House budget chief is not your run-of-the-mill intellectual. His style is to be down-home, but his record of accomplishment is dazzling.”
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2010/10/15/AR2010101504710.html
DJShay
Oh God, people. Bachmann has been named to the Intelligence Committee
MikeJ
@LGRooney: IF they asked him, “how much will a three week war cost”, it’s hard to blame him for telling them. As a budget guy isn’t wasn’t his job, and probably wasn’t possible, for him to say how long the occupation would be.
There are plenty of other reasons he’s an idiot.
Mark S.
@El Cid:
Oh God, that sounds like the pseudo-science Newt likes to throw around that makes Joke Line and others gush about what an intellectual he is.
We’ll soon get to see what happens when the states receive no aid. It’s rare you get to do such experiments in macroeconomics.
Violet
What? No love for Bachmann? Glenn Beck can hardly keep his head-that-does-the-thinking under control he’s so thrilled by the idea.
Don’t count out Snowbilly Snooki. The GOP male candidates won’t know what to do when she calls them sexist.
snabby
I hope Huckabee stays out of it, because he’s the guy who scares me. Don’t know if he’s sufficiently freakish to get through the primary, but in the general his folksy charm would be perfect. And he understands media very well.
jwb
Meh, I really don’t think it matters. At this point, all the Gooper candidates are cut from the same mold, and from a governing perspective the differences among them won’t amount to squat if any one of them manages to get elected. In any case, a lot will depend on whether the House takes the crazy to 11 this spring and if it does how the various candidates react to it.
Mike in NC
The American people have elected a number of poorly qualified shitbirds to high national office over the years, but a midget in the White House? Not gonna happen.
NobodySpecial
@shortstop: Feature, not a bug. Remember, we’re not talking about winning a general, we’re talking about winning the combination of stupid, racist, and classist that is the modern GOP primary voter.
Davis X. Machina
@John PM: Check out the poll today in PA — Obama beats all named challengers — in a state that just elected Republicans to the state house and the Senate.
LGRooney
@MikeJ: I agree that he can’t know how long it will be but, if he is paying attention, he will understand that there are plenty of public arguments about the shape of the coming war/occupation. As such, any analyst worth half his salt is going to actually set up what ifs when presenting the specifically-requested data.
So, my questions stand. And, I suppose I could add another: is he that incurious?
stuckinred
Another draft dodging Ivy League republican.
New Yorker
Until Lady Starbursts is finally fired out of the airlock (that’s a ham-fisted reference to the alien queen in “Aliens”), she will continue to scare me more than any other candidate.
MobiusKlein
I saw Daniels on the Lawrence O’Donnell show, and was unimpressed with both of them.
Lawrence asked about the tax increase he approved, and Daniels parried with the tax reduction he championed at the same time.
But Lawrence didn’t note that the Sales Tax increase is regressive, and the Property Tax decrease was also regressive. The tax increase affects the poor the most, and the decrease helps the rich the most.
I was annoyed in real time, so the host should have caught that as well.
Rommie
If they can’t beat the Red Ink Bush budget chief, the Democrats are hopeless against any opponent. That should be a Steelers vs. any Panther team you want to throw at them beatdown.
terraformer
I expect Doghouse Riley, who has suffered under Daniels’ incompetence in Indiana for years now, has enough smack on this fool to keep the questions coming hard. If the Very Serious deign to ask them, that is.
shortstop
@Mike in NC: Agreed. I guess the question is whether a very short man can make it through the primaries to grab the nomination. Even that is iffy, I think, although his height will certainly get less visibility in that stage of the game.
Bruce (formerly Steve S.)
I still think they’ll swallow hard and nominate Romney. Should be a fun early primary season, though, and announcements should start any day now if the ’08 season is a guide. I can hardly wait.
KG
Gingrich, Romney, or Huckabee will be the nominee. You don’t win the GOP nomination on the first try unless you are George W Bush and use every connection you have to clear the field (seriously, there weren’t better potential candidates than W and McCain in 2000?) or you are a sitting Vice-president (see Nixon, 1960). That’s just the way it happens, not even the Right Wing Radio and Blogosphere blather could stop McCain from getting the nomination in 2008 (remember how much they all hated him before he won the nomination?). It’s going to come down to one simple question: whose turn is it?
david mizner
@Just Some Fuckhead:
The Times piece says he’s five-seven (with a comb-over)
“Which is why Mr. Daniels is often mentioned as a potential presidential candidate, despite — as just about every profile notes — not looking much like a president (5 foot 7, with a comb-over) and seeming genuinely torn about the rigors of a national campaign.”
stuckinred
@shortstop: He’s tall enough to swing his leg over a softail.
http://www.news-banner.com/pix/sitegraphics/danielscorn.jpg
Villago Delenda Est
Sorry, but Daniels is a fucking liar.
The military planners who predicted a long, expensive, manpower intensive occupation, which anyone with actual military training at the command and staff level could have done, were either forced to retire (Shinseki) or otherwise disposed of by Feldmarschall von Rumsfailed.
The perpetrators of this atrocity, all of them, should be treated as we treated what was left of the Third Reich’s and the Imperial Japanese high commands at the conclusion of WWII.
freelancer
@Violet:
Or the pundits that face the wrath of the AM radio rabble when she calls them “hoity-toity“.
It’s like you can see the gears grind in their heads, “Oh Shit! I need these morons to keep liking me so I don’t have to go out and get a real job. I should probably STFU about Palin if I want to keep buying T-bones with this wingnut welfare.”
stuckinred
@Villago Delenda Est: and this should be the land of the free and the home of the brave
kth
Leonhardt:
So, does David Leonhardt believe that the OMB should accept preposterously rosy scenarios from all government agencies, or from just the DoD?
Also, TPM has Daniels on the teevee (edit: probably the Blitzer seg referenced in the OP) saying that the deficits of the 2000s can’t be attributed to the Bush tax cuts. So apparently, despite his reputation to the contrary, Daniels is a supply side magic beans Republican just like the rest.
Davis X. Machina
@KG:
Or ‘Who’s the best hater”?
The policy core of the GOP is down to two questions. Answer them and you can predict their course of action.
1.) How will this reduce taxation on the wealthiest 10%?
2,) How will this piss liberals off?
All the rest, they’re just playing at, including even their old stand-byes, like Warren Terra….
schrodinger's cat
Hey what’s wrong with being 5’3”? Heightist! I am not much taller than 5’3” myself but I am not a man, so I guess its ok..
dr. bloor
@shortstop:
The optics of a post-debate handshake between Daniels and Obama would be stunning.
Of course, the wingnuts would just conclude that Obama is Manute Bol’s secret half-brother, thereby confirming his African birth.
Capri
Daniels would be a strong contender in a presidential race if he can get nominated by his party. His purity is highly in doubt, and today it would prevent him from being looked at twice. He hasn’t completely dicked over his state a la the Minnesota govener, and the hard right doesn’t like that at all. In 2 years if the teabag stuff has run its course, maybe the party will come back to him.
A few months ago he said that maybe the Republicans should put all their social issues on the back burner until the economic problems are addressed. He had to walk it back when the howls on the right got too loud.
I know plenty of Democrats in Indiana who like him well enough and voted for his re-election.
I know a few ultra-right wing nuts [for example, the guy who told me that people would have rallied behind Tim McVeigh when he bombed the Federal Building if there hadn’t been any kids killed by mistake and the guy who spent a solid month after the presidential election moaning about how he wants his country back] and they HATE Daniels with the intensity of a 1000 suns because he’s a sell out. They love Mike Pence, however.
freelancer
@stuckinred:
I didn’t know they made pocket bikes in that style.
Just Some Fuckhead
@david mizner:
Everyone knows hagiography adds three or four inches.
KG
@Davis X. Machina: the “will this piss of liberals” is actually a pretty good measuring stick. My sister seems to like Sarah Palin simply because I don’t.
schrodinger's cat
I think John McCain is going to run again, but I doubt that GOP will nominate him. I think Romney will be the nominee, its his turn after all.
stuckinred
@freelancer: whoa, how do dey do dat?
MikeJ
@kth:
When the CBO scores bills they have to accept as valid everything the bill claims to be true. I’m fairly sure the OMB actually does have to accept whatever rosy scenario the agencies pass along.
Do you want OMB telling EPA, no there won’t be any pollution this year, you don’t need that much money?
david mizner
@Just Some Fuckhead:
Agreed. If he’s saying he’s five seven….you can subtract several inches. I just read a thing on line from someone who says he’s stood next to him and that he’s five-two. Naploeon was about five-five.
shortstop
@david mizner:
Ah, he wore his Pee Wee Herman shoes to the interview. (Am I dating myself?)
@schrodinger’s cat:
Like I said, voter prejudices can be wacky. But damned if this one isn’t widespread. I don’t endorse it. I just note it.
Cermet
Does it really matter what any thug says relative to the truth or reality? I mean, the brain dead dit-0-heads that vote for them believe Lee was a great general and that farm subsidies keep family farms alive – if two greater myths that have existed for so long are still believed, you think they will suddenly discover that facts aren’t liberal and listen to people who tell them the truth?
dr. bloor
@freelancer:
They got nuthin’ on these guys.
shortstop
@Capri:
The third baseman and I did GOTV work in Indy before the 2008 election. We were stunned by how many lawns sported both Obama and Daniels signs. That kind of interspecies lovin’ never goes on here in Chicago.
stuckinred
@dr. bloor: My old man used to call them the “Weenies with the beanies!
shortstop
@schrodinger’s cat:
This never even occurred to me. But I hope it turns out to be the case, because I feel he hasn’t suffered nearly enough yet.
fasteddie9318
@DJShay:
Since Bachmann is anti-intelligence, won’t the Intelligence Committee just annihilate itself as soon as she sits down in her seat? I wonder how much energy that would produce.
MikeJ
@dr. bloor: I loved that album when I was in high school.
fasteddie9318
@schrodinger’s cat:
I hope this time he tries exploiting his POW stint a bit. I had no idea!
FormerSwingVoter
They could nominate an inanimate object and it would still get over 40% of the popular vote. Fox and Rush and RedState would constantly tell their listeners about how Candidate Stuffed Penguin stood for freedom and America and how it didn’t need a teleprompter and boom – you’ve just locked up a hundred or more electoral votes right there.
schrodinger's cat
@shortstop: He has a big enough ego and is deluded enough to do it, me thinks.
kth
@MikeJ: Surely this was the other way around. This was more like a wingnut EPA head saying, “don’t worry, there won’t be any pollution this year, just pencil us out if you have to.”
Breezeblock
Sorry, Mitch Daniels is even MORE of a Sooper Scary Mooslim than Obama; Danils is an ACTUAL A-rab!
I don’t make Teabagging Rules, I just abide by them.
eemom
Big Jesusy Daddy Huckster the Affable is a serious contender, I’m afeered. And he’s Sarah Palin with a dick and considerably more brain cells.
schrodinger's cat
Won’t Bachmann on the intelligence committee cause a spontaneous explosion?
catclub
@DJShay: The point is to muzzle her by telling her secret things she cannot talk about. Not such a bad trick.
If she fucks up and tells, they get to roast her, and only our soldiers, CIA and foreign informants will be killed.
Also, no one is mentioneing the brilliant Mike Pence, who won the straw poll at some conservative shindig.
MikeJ
@kth: Sure, but the OMB shouldn’t be the one making the call about ho much pollution there will be. The EPA should. The OMB should decide how long a military occupation should be.
I’m not saying he’s a wonderful person. I’m not saying the Bush administration weren’t full of shit. I’m saying he answered the question he was asked.
schrodinger's cat
@Breezeblock: Not all Arabs are Muslim, neither are all Muslims Arab. Is that too difficult a concept for the crazies to grasp?
shortstop
@schrodinger’s cat: Plus he’s still stewing incessantly about the smarter, more charismatic, younger, cooler, taller black guy eating his lunch. Ordinarily that kind of pathetic end-of-life fretting would earn a half-measure of sympathy from me, but since McCain takes out all his personal failures on immigrants, women and gay people, he can fuck right off.
fasteddie9318
In a sane country, they’d run Daniels, Obama would give a short speech entitled, “This is the sanest, smartest, most capable candidate the Republicans could find, and he’s still a serial liar nutbag who was a complete dipshit fuck-up in his last federal job, and whose state is in shit shape right now also too” and the race would be over. So Daniels will probably win if he runs. Teabaggers will be thrilled to have a
white guyfiscal conservative back in power.NobodySpecial
@schrodinger’s cat: It’s certainly a cheaper way to make black holes than building a supercollider!
eemom
‘course, there’s also Cheney….but then whoever the vp was would be like, NO heartbeat away from the presidency, amirite? haw haw.
Breezeblock
@schrodinger’s cat: I realize your question was rhetorical!
fasteddie9318
@shortstop:
Fingers crossed!
fasteddie9318
@eemom:
Only until Dick has some young buck shot in the face so he can get a heart transplant that he doesn’t deserve.
shortstop
@fasteddie9318: Even if it’s inaccurate, he’s almost certainly not going to get any mentally or emotionally healthier from here on out. So there’s that.
Violet
@schrodinger’s cat:
Yes. SATSQ.
@eemom:
He’s got zero hotness quotient. Ultimately that will be his downfall. The Pres has to have some kind of sex appeal and Huck has the sex appeal of the Pillsbury doughboy.
freelancer
@dr. bloor:
lmao. I swear to FSM that was my first joke, but I deleted it because I couldn’t find a shriner on a tiny bike.
schrodinger's cat
@Violet: Really? What about both the Bushes? I can’t see no hotness there.
cckids
@El Cid:
In what rose-colored version of his world are many people ALREADY not working till 68, 70, etc.? My FIL is still working full time at 81. Granted, he works a desk job, not construction or something, but he is not still working because he loves it so much. Its keeping food on the table, paying the mortgage & utilities. Plus giving them enough left over (w/SS) to travel 1-2 times per year to see the grandkids.
On only SS, they’d be in a tiny apartment, just existing. And they are the lucky ones. Many people that age still in the workforce are greeters at WalMart, pushing fast food, etc. Especially the older women whose generation wasn’t necessarily in the workforce.
arguingwithsignposts
FSM, I hate Greg Mankiw. Why these people have jobs, I have no fucking idea.
KG
@catclub: plus it’ll make her interviews more fun, every other quote is going to be, “well, if you knew half of what I know from sitting on the Intelligence Committee, then…”
shortstop
@KG: Ha! No doubt. I’m hoping the other half of her quotes will be her blurting out classified information because she just can’t stop herself.
ETA: Sorry, I now see that was catclub’s original point!
schrodinger's cat
@NobodySpecial: May be we should do this experiment in outer space, you know beyond the solar system!
KG
off topic, but I have ESPN on and Tim Tebow still bothers me for reasons that I can’t quite explain.
georgia pig
Daniels will go nowhere. Republicans need someone they can build an erotic/emotional mythology around, not a short, balding accountant. Thune is a possibility, with all that windchapped hunkiness that puts the lead in Bobo’s pencil, but he seems dull as dishwater and dumb as a rock. Romney is the one I fear the most, because he’s got his “dynamic businessman/shoulders like a 747” schtick and some independents would vote for him because of a (mis)perceived moderateness that he might be able to sell in the general based on his years in MA. But he won’t get through the primaries with the current ascendancy of the Teahadists. Considering the other pygmies out there, Palin has a legit shot. The establishment boys might not be able to keep her out — the Dem establishment sure couldn’t stop Obama. She’ll also be an audience share wet dream for FOX, so she’ll have her own propaganda outlet. 2012 could be funny and scary all at the same time. BTW, could Obama please ask Joe to retire (don’t get me wrong, I like Joe) and bring Gillibrand on the ticket in 2012?
Calouste
@KG:
I doubt very much the GOP primaries will result in nominating a Mormon or a Catholic, so….
stuckinred
@KG: he’s a fucking Gator, that’s a start!
schrodinger's cat
What about Rubio? Or is it too soon?
arguingwithsignposts
@stuckinred:
That’s an end, too. :)
georgia pig
@stuckinred: That’s all you need to know.
Violet
@schrodinger’s cat:
Bush the Elder was a WWII pilot who got shot down. There’s a certain macho-ness to that. He may not have had the looks necessarily, but he could legitimately claim some toughness.
Bush the Younger, according to some people, was (is?) a somewhat good looking man with a certain affable charm. I don’t find him good looking or affable or appealing at all, but those things have been written and said of him. Remember Chris Matthews and the whole “women swoon over men in flight suits” nonsense? There was some grain of truth to it.
Power and money makes men sexier, even when they’re ugly. That could be part of it too.
Violet
@schrodinger’s cat:
Rubio will wait until 2016. It will be an open field for the Dems. He’s young so he can afford to wait.
Citizen_X
@Breezeblock: “He warn’t born in Amurrica, he war born in Monongahela!”
Tsulagi
@Mike in NC:
Yeah, at 5’3, or even with a hairsprayed combover at 5’7, not gonna happen. Guess he could strap on a pair of 12” platforms. You just know there are plenty of wingnutters with platforms lurking in their closets along with all their other accoutrements.
KG
@schrodinger’s cat: too soon, too young (he’s only 39), too brown for certain segments of the GOP primary electorate, and likely too Catholic.
danimal
The GOP tries to front-load the primaries with a lot of winner-take-all votes early on to winnow the field to one rather quickly. I suspect 2012 will be the year in which this strategy doesn’t work, with several early winners carrying a state or two each. With a grinding war of attrition, the most organized, strategic candidate will win out, or a late entry will come out of nowhere to win the nomination.
Shorter me: Romney the grinder or Starburst Palin will win the nomination.
Erikthe Red
@schrodinger’s cat:
Personally, I think it is.
Bill Arnold
@Davis X. Machina:
I’d put “piss liberals off” as #1, with tax cuts for the affluent as a close #2
schrodinger's cat
William Daley is the new White House chief of staff. I guess John will have to change the rotating tag line to, show me on the doll where Daley touched you.
schrodinger's cat
Other candidates to consider
Cuchinelli (sp?) of Virginia,
Ron Paul
Chris Christie
shortstop
@danimal: The GOP changed their calendar after 2008. Now, the winner-take-all primaries will be in April and the early contests will be proportional.
WereBear
You don’t see it because you’re sane and (I’m guessing) have actually experienced Real Love in some form. These are qualities notably lacking in the R’s I’ve met. So they settle for the rich guy who sometimes will share his drugs and get you into the country club on a guest pass. Best they can do!
It is Romney’s turn, but he wears Magic Underwear. I just can’t see the Midwest & South voting for a Mormon; not when the Xantian element is so strong.
Contrariwise, I won’t worry about Huckabee. He’s a golden boy in the Bible Belt and South, but that’s not enough elsewhere; he so crashed and burned in the primaries.
And I don’t know if he’s got the burning desire for power; he makes plenty of money with Fox, and it doesn’t have term limits. My spidey sense tells me he visits ladies he’s not married to; he doesn’t really want the scrutiny of the race.
Then again, he’s as arrogant as a weasel on steroids; he certainly could think he could get away with it.
The Republicans running someone with breasts for President? Not. Ever.
McCain is actually the Strom Thurmond of the party right now.
And my stomach can’t take any more.
General Stuck
What’s your name?
Omnes Omnibus
@General Stuck: Is he rich like me?
stuckinred
@General Stuck: is he rich?
cmorenc
@Martin:
This is a bit like a rough-tumble political version of “the Sorcerer’s Apprentice”, the classic cartoon episode from the Disney epic Fantasia where the apprentice (played by Mickey Mouse) finds a magic incantation in his Sorcerer-Master’s thick recipe book to animate his broomstick into doing the hard, long work for him of making many trips back and forth from an outside well to fill an inside water-cistern. Mickey animates the broomstick and takes a snooze while letting the broomstick do the work. Mickey wakes up and finds that he doesn’t know how to control the broomstick to make it stop when the cistern is full, and finally tries to stop it by destroying it, chopping the animated broom into hundreds of tiny pieces. However, each piece morphs into a separate, full-sized broomstick with a pail, and the army of animated broomsticks run over Mickey and flood the Sorcerer’s home. The Sorcerer returns and knows how to reverse the incantation and put everything back like it was, under control of the master sorcerer.
Query whether the GOP has a sorcerer smart and powerful enough to control the army of broomsticks carrying poison water that they’ve set loose, before they destroy the house. I’m not sure even Karl Rove is that good.
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
Daniels is unelectable.
Daniels is ….. wait for it….. an arab.
Game/Set/Match Mrs. Palin.
While he’s not a muslim, he is of arab descent and has even been honored by arab organizations.
The low-information, under educated, superstitious, easily manipulated gop primary voters will never vote for an arab.
danimal
@shortstop: Thanks, I’ll take a look at the revised schedule.
I still think Palin will jump in at a very late stage of the nominating process. But I may need to reevaluate my prediction a bit.
WereBear
Actually, when I think of who gets the voters worked up, it’s Palin.
Then again, what do I know? The party of millionaires just sent a bunch of idiots to the House who want to not raise the debt ceiling, making everyone equally poor when the world’s currencies collapse.
meander
Another good question for Daniels is “As budget director why didn’t you make an incredible stink about the failure of the Bush administration to put the cost of the Iraq war into the budget instead of off-budget?”
Southern Beale
I was really looking forward to a Palin/Bachmann ticket.
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
The other strike against Daniels — he’s 5’4″
Palin will tower over the munchkin.
http://www.thetruthaboutcars.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/11/bush-daniels.jpg
El Cid
@Mark S.: The honorable, principled Elder Statesman Gingrich.
MikeJ
@meander: This is a much better question than the “budget director telling the pentagon how long a war will last” one.
El Cid
Daniels is only 5’4″? Clearly he can’t be a good archaeologist.
eemom
@schrodinger’s cat:
I don’t think that crazy fuck Kookinelli would get anywhere, but I wouldn’t be surprised if our more ready for prime time governor McDonnell gave it a shot.
Tonal Crow
It’s gonna be Griftibou Barbie. The teabaggers will demand it, especially after Boehner disappoints them by failing to cause the United States to default
geg6
This sounds like the Villagers dispensing their “wisdom” to me. I know that Sully sure has fallen for it as he posts swooning paens to him at least twice a week. Sadly, he is almost as short as a little person, was the architect of the hilarious-if-it-wasn’t-so-sad Iraq War costs, blames the Bush deficits on the dotcom crash, and seems to think that we should increase the retirement age to 100 because young people will regularly live that long due to their ability to get replacement body parts when the old ones wear out, presumably available for next to nothing at Walmart.
Sounds perfect as a Teabagger nominee, but not so great for the GE. And even for the Teabaggers, there are problems. He’s a skeery brownish person of Syrian descent (secret Muslim!). And he has no stomach for the culture wars.
No way Daniels has a chance, but the Villagers looooove him.
WereBear
@geg6: I need scotch!
I’ve got the hiccups giggling over getting my spare body parts at WalMart.
Cat Lady
@Violet:
Have you seen his family? The caption should be “We’re all gonna make you squeal like a pig!”
No one as mockable as all of the GOP candidates stands a chance. Tina Fey single handedly sunk Palin, and she was the only one who could. Mitch Daniels is an ugly midget version of Peyton Manning. Barbour is a Boss Hogg joke. Romney wears magic underpants. They’re all jokes, and you can’t be a joke and be presnit.
Alex S.
I am most afraid of Jeb Bush. I think he’s the only one with a shot.
El Cid
@WereBear: You should go to Sam’s Club, you can get a dozen for 15% less.
Omnes Omnibus
@Cat Lady: Note to Huck and the boys: Vertical stripes are slimming, but they cannot work miracles.
eemom
@Omnes Omnibus:
tee hee. Stripes, comb-overs……orange people……what a party.
Omnes Omnibus
@eemom: Where is Willy Wonka when you need him?
geg6
@eemom:
Hey, Kookinelli has as much chance as anyone. Hell, my favorite former senator, Man on Dog Santorum is running. I am personally praying it will end up Santorum/ Bachmann.
JCT
@eemom:
Just imagining the Republican “debate” tableau makes me grin.
Jay C
@WereBear:
You think they’ll be Chinese, like most of Wal-mart’s imports?
Great idea: we can rebuild ourselves into living past 100; and the Chinese can deal with their excess population…….
El Cid
@Jay C: “Gentlemen, we can rebuild them. We have the trade agreements. We have the purchasing power to build the world’s first moronic senior population. The United States’ elderly will be those morons. Cheaper than they were before. Cheaper, flimsier, full of lead and melamine.”
Brachiator
@schrodinger’s cat:
Romney is easy pickings for being a flip flopper.
“Mittsy, you were all gung hu for the Massachusetts health care plan, but you say that your first task as president would be to eliminate federal health care. Is there anything that you believe in, or are you just an unprincipled, amoral hack who will do anything to secure the nomination. You know, like a John McCain, only Mormon?”
Tonal Crow
@Cat Lady:
Forgotten Dubya already, eh?
Cat Lady
@Tonal Crow:
He was selected. That was a coup, remember, and that is no joke.
Tonal Crow
@Cat Lady: And what makes you think that, for example, Lady Griftostarburst of the Backwoods Kingdom of Wasilla cannot be selected?
Cat Lady
@Tonal Crow:
She’s white trash who doesn’t have an ex-president ex-CIA daddy with the entire GOP establishment behind her, a stable of fixers in very high places and bottomless pockets. That group isn’t going to bother with her cuz she’s a loose cannon loser, which is why they’re looking for a new daddy. If anyone is going to be installed, it will be Jeb. Oh yeah, they’d do it all again for Jeb.
Cacti
I tend to be a glass half-empty sort of person, and even with my inherent pessimism, I don’t see anyone from the cadre of GOP hopefuls that scares me.
This might be their weakest field of candidates in my lifetime.
matoko_chan
@Just Some Fuckhead: and McCains wiki says hes 5’9″ ……in lifters. that is why he tripped on the debate stage. McCain is 5’6″. that is what his doctors report said.
NO FUCKING WAY.
The last time a presidential candidate under 5’7″ succeeded he had just won the civil war.
aint happening, DougJ.
Dennis SGMM
@Cat Lady:
Of course the GOP would never, ever, pull off another coup because today’s SCOTUS would absolutely step in on the side of the angels. Right.
All of this giggling about how stupid, how incapable, how much of a buffoon any particular GOP candidate for president would be is just whistling past the graveyard. If unemployment is still in excess of nine percent in 2012 then the GOP will be able to run a blind, three-legged dog and get it elected president.
Jeffro
It’ll be Romney/Thune or Romney/Jindal
Nickel bet
Mike Kay (Chief of Staff)
@Jeffro: no way romeny survives romneycare and being a mormon.
NorthernMNer
Here’s a question for the room. With all the speculation of who will and who won’t run in ’12, who among the prospective candidates are hiring campaign staff, hiring consultants, visiting the battleground primary states frequently, or doing other things to build an infrastructure for an actual presidential campaign?
I know Romney and Pawlenty have certainly been doing this, but have any of the rest been doing anything like this?
Cacti
@Dennis SGMM:
You’re right. We’re doomed.
I’ll go get my sackcloth and ashes asap.
Sean
“that cornfed charm goes over well in the midwest”
Dude…fuck you. What a load of fucking bullshit. So-called corn-fed charm goes over just as well in upstate NY or Vermont, or West Virginia, or Montana. Or Texas. Or Washington. Wherever.
Sometimes the shit you say is such unmitigated asshole-ery, and for no good reason. This is one of those times.
News flash, junior – dumb ignorant shits who live nearer to the East coast are no more advanced or that much different than dumb ignorant shits who live in the Midwest. A dumb ignorant shit is a dumb ignorant shit, no matter where it lives.
Did I mention fuck you?
Thanks!
Paul in NC
Not only is he 5’3″, he’s bald. America hasn’t elected a bald president since Dwight Eisenhower, before the age of television. (Ford doesn’t count – he wasn’t elected).
Just picture him standing on a box at a podium beside Palin or then Obama at a debate (a la Kucinich). A short, bald President? Not likely. For better or worse, looks count in electoral politics.