It is amazing to me how oblivious to their own mind-numbing fuckery some people are. Why is it that when confronted with their own prejudices, bigotry, or plain old bad behavior, the first reaction of an asshat (be it a racist, homophobic, misogynistic, or “any combination of the three” asshat), their first instinct is not to examine their own thoughts and behavior and to determine why it is they are fucked in the head, but rather, to get defensive and circle the wagons. “I’m not a racist, but black people are so stupid, mirite?” “I don’t have anything against Muslims, but I really wish they’d stop blowing our shit up with their anchor babiez of terrah.”
These are the same people who preface their bullshit statements with, “With all due respect” or “No offense, but” and then proceed to spout some garbage that makes you want to crush their heads with your thumb and index finger.
A person who starts a sentence with “with all due respect” is essentially saying, “you’re stupid and I hate you.” A person who starts a sentence with, “No offense, but” is about to say something untoward about having relations with your mom: “No offense, but you look like you fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. How come your mom is so hot when she’s naked? Oh whoops! Did I not tell you about that? Well don’t get all mad, I said, ‘no offense!'”
No one ever says, “No offense, but you are the smartest person in the world.” Or “With all due respect, I think everything you just said is stunningly intelligent and I am smarter for having heard it.”
So when I read the latest bigoted bullshit coming out of Montana (which is, as I wrote here, the land of the free and the lynched gays!), my eyes couldn’t help but roll themselves into the far reaches of my brain:
HELENA, Mont. — Alarmed by evidence that gay and lesbian students are common victims of schoolyard bullies, many school districts are bolstering their antiharassment rules with early lessons in tolerance, explaining that some children have “two moms” or will grow up to love members of the same sex.
But such efforts to teach acceptance of homosexuality, which have gained urgency after several well-publicized suicides by gay teenagers, are provoking new culture wars in some communities.
Many educators and rights advocates say that official prohibitions of slurs and taunts are most effective when combined with frank discussions, from kindergarten on, about diverse families and sexuality.
Angry parents and religious critics, while agreeing that schoolyard harassment should be stopped, charge that liberals and gay rights groups are using the antibullying banner to pursue a hidden “homosexual agenda,” implicitly endorsing, for example, same-sex marriage.
Last summer, school officials here in Montana’s capital unveiled new guidelines for teaching about sexuality and tolerance. They proposed teaching first graders that “human beings can love people of the same gender,” and fifth graders that sexual intercourse can involve “vaginal, oral or anal penetration.”1
A local pastor, Rick DeMato, carried his shock straight to the pulpit.
“We do not want the minds of our children to be polluted with the things of a carnal-minded society,” Mr. DeMato, 69, told his flock at Liberty Baptist Church.
In tense community hearings, some parents made familiar arguments that innocent youngsters were not ready for explicit language. Other parents and pastors, along with leaders of the Big Sky Tea Party, saw a darker purpose.
“Anyone who reads this document can see that it promotes acceptance of the homosexual lifestyle,” one mother said at a six-hour school board meeting in late September.
Barely heard was the plea of Harlan Reidmohr, 18, who graduated last spring and said he was relentlessly tormented and slammed against lockers after coming out during his freshman year. Through his years in the Helena schools, he said at another school board meeting, sexual orientation was never once discussed in the classroom, and “I believe this led to a lot of the sexual harassment I faced.”
Last month, the federal Department of Education told schools they were obligated, under civil rights laws, to try to prevent harassment, including that based on sexual orientation and gender identity. But the agency did not address the controversy over more explicit classroom materials in grade schools.2
Some districts, especially in larger cities, have adopted tolerance lessons with minimal dissent. But in suburban districts in California, Illinois and Minnesota, as well as here in Helena, the programs have unleashed fierce opposition.
“Of course we’re all against bullying,” Mr. DeMato, one of numerous pastors who opposed the plan, said in an interview. “But the Bible says very clearly that homosexuality is wrong, and Christians don’t want the schools to teach subjects that are repulsive to their values.”
What the what?!! No. NO!! Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong!!
You cannot teach kids tolerance while at the same time preach that homosexuality is wrong and is repulsive to Christian values. You cannot teach tolerance while at the same time complaining that teaching tolerance promotes acceptance of the subject of the intolerance, which is the reason you have to teach tolerance in the first fucking place! It doesn’t make sense!
Do these people not see that every time they open their mouths, hypocrisy falls out?
“We’re all against racism, but white people don’t want schools to teach equality.”
“We’re all against misogyny, but men don’t want the school to teach respect for women.”
Do the above statements make sense? Of course they don’t. Yet bigots continue to make the argument that I’m not against homosexuality, but it’s a sin ‘cuz the biblez totally says so, you guyzzzzz.
What should be said:
“We’re all against bullying and as educators and members of the religious community, we will do everything we can to stop it.”
Any person who attempts to cloak their bigotry in religion is a bigoted asshat and should be called out as such every fucking day.
1 Wow, really? We’re teaching fifth graders about anal sex? That’s um… well… weird. Then again, I don’t have kids, so what the hell do I know.
2 When the Teatwits shut down the Department of Education, they can just bully all the ‘mos right out of the state! Get out and stay out!
[image via Slap Upside the Head]