Bad Punditry
My luggage apparently decided to take another flight, and rather than go to the hotel then come back two hours later, I’m in a hotel bar steeling myself for the election results with a bottle of shitty pinot noir. There is going to be a lot of bad punditry tonight, but I thought this just took the cake:
If indications hold true, voters Tuesday will deliver a powerful rebuke to the Obama administration and its plans to transform America. Also, “Toy Story 3” will come out on DVD. These two events are not unrelated.
The reason I am a lowly blogger and not a big time columnist is because I am too sober not creative enough to make this shit up.
I guess I should have added “shitty punditry” to my list of stuff I object to.
That is the shittiest attempt at political analysis I’ve ever seen.
That’s what you get when you don’t tip the skycap.
That’s why I never check a bag if I can help it.
Swing State Project has a handy map showing poll closing times and key races arranged by time.
Edit: I carry a picture of my checked luggage in my carryon. Saves time at the baggage counter when I file the missing baggage report.
Drinking contest: Drink everytime you hear the phrase “Center-Right Nation” tonight.
yeah, and we’re all john wayne now, goddammit, ’cause we watched a cartoon movie about toys.
the dark age is upon us.
“These two events are not unrelated” has got huge potential.
Toy Story 3 as a cautionary tale of sochulist dystopia… Ummm wow… Yeah… that’s going to be tough to beat for stupid.
@Redshirt:
It might be quicker to climb into the barrel and pull the lid over your head.
Who are you, Annal T. House?
I take some solace in the fact that I will be entertained by seeing deficit hawk tea party voters try and justify why deficits don’t matter for the next two years after the GOP rams a new series of tax cuts down the Democrats’ throats and deficits and the debt skyrocket, pisses on their base’s naive hopes for spending cuts, and takes a giant steaming crap on their heads just for the hell of it.
Someone got paid to write that? And it wasn’t even McMegan, it was someone else. The stupid is multiplying.
Klavan is the douche who compared George Bush to Batman.
The Texas Rangers lost last night.
The two events are not unrelated.
So a movie about living with James Dobson’s family connects to Obama – how exactly?
@Redshirt:
You’ll be falling down drunk after 5 minutes of the Tweety show at that rate.
I feel a shitty pinot noir — indeed, any wine — is a poor match to the occasion. Perchance a little single malt? Live a little. Soften the blow.
@Alex S.: Indeed, it is central to my point.
You were suppose to tell us about the TSA agents patting you down or something before you boarded the plane.
why do these mental-midgets always end up getting a public megaphone? Crap like that comparison just makes me want to leave the planet.
You can do it with anything: “If indications hold true, voters Tuesday will deliver a powerful rebuke to the Obama administration and its plans to transform America. Also, on Wednesday San Francisco will hold a parade to honor the World Champion San Francisco Giants. These two events are not unrelated.”
Also, first Season of V on Blu-ray is now available today.
This obviously means Obama is a lizard alien. He needs to concede that this is a center-right non-lizard nation.
I went in for a colonoscopy this morning. The TV in the waiting room was blaring republican ads and nothing but republican ads for the entire morning–and I’m in MA. A steady drumbeat of “lower taxes, more jobs, blah blah we hate Deval Patrick and Nancy Pelosi.” I had to go stand in the hallway and then, finally, simply remove myself from the GI area entirely. They had to come find me when it was my turn. If ad buys determine this election the dems are doomed here in ma (and yes, I voted a week ago).
aimai
@Joe Bauers: That is the shittiest attempt at cinematic analysis I’ve ever seen.
I have yoga class tonight. Following that, I will drink whiskey while studiously avoiding watching election coverage.
These two events are not unrelated.
Ow.
@freelancer:
Are we talking about the original miniseries, the vastly inferior ongoing series, or the recent bewildering remake?
At least I now know, as a lover of crime novels, to avoid Klavan’s. If that’s how he writes, it ain’t how I roll.
I can tell right now that over the next two years I am going to spend many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many days drunk.
Starting tonight.
Fuck it.
Starting right now.
@Origuy:
That sounds kinda OCD but I can see how it could be useful..so many bags look alike. Once I grabbed my bag and when I got to the hotel couldn’t figure out why the heck my combination on the lock wouldn’t work. I jimmied the thing open and found a bunch of unfamiliar clothes, as well as a ton of drug samples (unfortunately, none of the good kind). Turns out me and the doc who’d just come back from a medical convention had exactly the same suitcase.
It’s a drag to be stuck somewhere with somebody else’s stuff. And not even the good stuff.
Ah, but what about that moron who said Bush was like Batman around the time The Dark Knight came out?
@david mizner:
Oh. Well then.
That really is epically stupid. I’m almost impressed.
Also, how do you suppose he squares this analysis with the actual end of the movie, where Metrosexual Ken becomes the new ruler of the daycare, instituting a more legitimate utopia? Where once a comfortable life was restricted to an elite class, and newcomers (immigrants, if you will) were forced to suffer the worst duties, now everyone shares the good and the bad equally, and this is explicitly presented as vastly superior.
Ah well, it’s like I always say: you can prove anything if you throw out enough of the data.
Jay in Oregon: They all sucked.
The only reason to follow the link is to read the nice takedown by modus potus:
“Kids grow out of huggy toys into action heros, detesting the former as babyish, then grow up and find action heros childish as well — except for Klavan, who can’t let go of the fantasy that all problems can be solved by the gunplay that opens the last reel. Unfortunately, our all-to-human sins have led us into a financial catastrophe that can’t be solved with a six-shooter. Obama neither caused this nor is he some super-hero who can solve it before the credits roll, so the country is going to paste the blame on him and his party. That’s a human thing to do, too…”
You know a newspaper is in trouble when the best writers on the site are the anonymous commentators.
watching the coverage will not affect the outcome, right?
so why watch?
@Que Sera Sera:
They sucked because they backed off the original premise, which was the imposition of a fascist regime in the United States.
They had to make it a metaphor so as not to offend too many Republicans.
What does the 25th Anniversary of Back to the Future have to do with this election season? Stay tuned to find out!
@aimai:
These two events are not unrelated.
Mark Ambinder throws cold water on Dem hopes of higher than expected turnout:
I think I need to start drinking now.
I am
too sobernot creative enough…This is the problem. People won’t take a stand. We all make fun of TeaPartiers, but at least they know what they believe.
@Violet: I know better than to get my hopes up. I remember the ’04 election exit polls that predicted a Kerry landslide.
Hell, I was a Red Sox fan back when they specialized in building you up, buttercup baby just to let you down, and mess you around.
@cleek:
Why watch the NFL? Or MLB?
@LarsThorwald:
I’ve been drunk since Gore won in 2000.
If I were to take a drink every time I heard the TV gasbags say “Republican tsunami” tonight, I’d be passed out face down on the floor before the election results started coming in.
@Tom Hilton:
You know, Tom Levenson’s post up above reminds me of a wonderful SJ Perlman piece on the tendency of star struck hollywood writers to link up things in their bio-pieces:
“He was born on a beautiful september morning to middle class parents in a suburb of Minneapolis. Later that day the Austro-Hungarian Empire would come to an end.”
aimai
I once went east to NY in the middle of February to go skiing in VT with my sister & family. American Airlines, in their wisdom sent all my winter clothes & ski stuff to Chile. I know this because they told me that’s were they went, alas, never to return home to me. So I bought new ski stuff and winter clothes (did I say it was February and I had only the California clothes on my back) and when I went to settle with American Airlines they told me I was lying and force me to sue them for the claim. I lost money on the deal even though I ended up winning the max amount (hey ski stuff is expensive). It stuck in my craw that they knew they sent the luggage to South America, told me about it then told me I was a liar & forced me to sue them in Small Claims Court. I have never flown American since nor will I again.
Hope you have better luck than I did.
My adopted dog just hucked up a pile (big … and steaming) of barely digested breakfast on my shoe. Now he is licking it off. Dogs kinda suck.
@djheru:
He said *bottle* not box.
@Violet: Bear in mind that if Democratic turnout was higher than expected so far, senior Democratic officials would likely be trying to surpress that data in order to make sure those who were waiting to vote still felt the urgency to do so.
@Mako:
And today is election day. Those two events are not unrelated.
@cleek: Are you absolutely certain that watching the coverage won’t affect the outcome? You’re not a sports fan, are you?
This is just perfect for the right. Compare Obama to a film….let’s see…what can I handle.
Ooh, Toy Story 3. We already tried Manchurian Candidate, but that just led to blank stares.
If you want to really puke, go to Amazon and look at the plot for his newest novel.
Oh hell, I’ll do it for you:
“Strongly political authors sometimes present readers with a problem: instead of simply following the story, they become distracted by subtext—by the black politician, for example, who cynically preaches the politics of hope as he ascends from a corrupt city to the national stage, his rise heralded by a brainless media. Then again, that kind of reading may be exactly what Klavan (Empire of Lies, 2008) intends. There are really two stories here: that of John Shannon, a thief framed for murder but given a second chance by a mysterious benefactor, and that of Lieutenant Brick Ramsey, a self-loathing stooge for the aforementioned politician, serving in a city ruined by flood and riot.”
Distracted by subtext. Now there’s a tag line for teabaggers.
I only made it through three paragraphs before wanting to smack someone.
@Tom Hilton:
I’m making a cheese sandwich, the cheese is from Wisconsin. These things are related. I met Al Gore once.
Chill. Obama will still sit in the Oval office, if the wingnuts take back the House. Of course, no more worthwhile legislation will get passed, but John Boehner will still be orange and dumb as a sack of hatchets. So the idiocracy is postponed for at least another 2 years. But the campaign for it goes on.
@Mako:
Does not compute.
You guys in the mood for some comedy?
Clinton advocates trials for war criminals.
Whatever happened to “We have to look forward and not backward?” Oh, right, I guess it’s do as we say, not as we do.
If you start drinking heavily now, you’ll pass out and wake up in time for the GIants parade tomorrow, skipping the whole side show.
Mark Thoma has some interesting thoughts about the coming gridlock over at The Economist’s View.
We need to be putting some thought into what trench warfare will mean for the next few years.
@NR:
Hey, NR. Why don’t you just get wild, and put on that elephant suit.
@sven: Don’t worry. Obama plans to double down on bipartisanship after the election, so this obviously won’t be a problem.
@NR: The whole “look forward not backwards” thing was a mistake, but to compare the Khmer Rouge and the Bush administration is ridiculous.
@BGinCHI: Nothing says “bad creative writing project” quite like “Lieutenant Brick Ramsey.”
@General Stuck: I would, but Obama is hogging it all to himself.
@Violet: Are these the same ‘Democratic insiders’ mounting the late afternoon celebrations in 2004?
@Violet:
FWIW, the early voting tallies suggest a record:
http://elections.gmu.edu/early_vote_2010.html
Slab Bulkhead
Bridge Largemeat
Punt Speedchunk
Butch Deadlift
Hold Bigflank
Splint Chesthair
Flint Ironstag
Bolt Vanderhuge
Thick McRunfast
Blast Hardcheese
Buff Drinklots
Crunch Slamchest
Fist Rockbone
Stump Beefnaught
Smash Lampjaw
Punch Rockgroin
Buck Plankchest
Stump Junkman
Dirk Hardpec
Rip Steakface
Slate Slabrock
Crud Bonemeal
Brick Hardmeat
Rip Slagcheek
Punch Sideiron
Gristle McThornbody
Slate Fistcrunch
Buff Hardback
Bob Johnson (oh, wait…)
Blast Thickneck
Crunch Buttsteak
Slab Squatthrust
Lump Beefbroth
Touch Rustrod
Beef Blastbody
Smoke Manmuscle
Beat Punchmeat
Hack Blowfist
Roll Fizzlebeef
Big McLargehuge
@NR: People like to hear about bipartisanship. People are also stupid. But notwithstanding their stupidity, or perhaps amplifying it, is their genuine desire to hear politicians talk about coming together to get things done, reach across the aisle, etc. etc. ad nauseam. I think I just saw a figure quoted that 70% of the public wants to see bipartisanship from the new Congress. True, this crop of Republicans abhors bipartisanship. _People won’t like that_.
@NR: What would have happened if he’d tried bipartisanship sooner, we will always be left to wonder…
@MattR: Venting is not a problem, long as they get up and work their ass off to administer a butt kicking two years from now.
@NR:
Right. The wingnuts love him to death. But they have you to pat
stabin him in the back.@MattR:
And today is election day. Those two events are not unrelated.
You don’t think so? The damn dog seems fairly attuned. Without further evidence I’m going Occam’s Razor on this. He’s puking and not eating it because the hippies are too lazy to vote. He’s just a dog, and not that bright, this is an animal that regularly eats his own vomit, but not now. Today. Election day. My dog WT7 is not eating his own vomit today!
I had to read this a couple times, because the first time my brain auto-corrected the crazy “not unrelated” to a much more sensible “not related.”
@morzer:
I hope that’s right.
Delaware Dems nervous about turnout. Link to WSJ article, so take with grain of salt.
I hope it’s just a political tactic to get Dems out to vote.
@freelancer:
Dash Riprock
Bolt Upright
@FlipYrWhig:
This assumes that people know what bipartisanship looks like. When David Brooks puts on the sad face and mutters about Eric Cantor’s reasonableness who is going to contradict him?
Looks like “These two events are not unrelated” will soon have to go into the BJ lexicon.
@FlipYrWhig: Probably rejected “Rock Ramsey” as too complicated. And maybe gay.
@freelancer:
I must protest.
Punt Speedchunk is alive and well and doing color commentary for the NFL. Yes, I know his pseudonym is Jon Gruden, but really….
Wow, so many of these could be the name of one of those mammoth super burgers over at Food Network
@MikeJ: Hugh Jackman
@david mizner:
Also, too, Cliff Clavin (John Ratzenberger) plays Hamm in “Toy Story” and Ratzenberger is a teabagger, having presented himself at the California State Capitol teabagfest(tm) last year, getting all weepy about how great the America he (okay his parents) emigrated to once was. Also, also, too: he campaigned for McCain and Scott Brown and sez healthcare=soshallusm
Klavan/Clavin…coinkidink? You decide!
@freelancer: Win. Just, win.
@FlipYrWhig: What people want is results. When someone is driving down a brand new road, do you think they think to themselves “I wonder if the funding for this road passed with bipartisan support?” When a mother takes her kids to school, do you think she thinks “I wonder if the funding for this school passed with bipartisan support?”
Of course not. The idea that the American people want ineffective, watered-down legislation in exchange for “bipartisanship” is patently ridiculous – and yet, it’s been the Obama administration’s and the Democratic leadership’s paradigm for the past two years.
People want policies that work and make their lives better. They don’t give a shit how you get there. Too bad nobody in the Democratic party seems to understand this.
@NR:
He’d better if he wants any shot at getting reelected.
@MikeJ: stuckinred can confirm this, but there used to be an Atlanta/Athens band called Dash Riprock.
@sven: Well, the new crop of crazy people in the halls of Congress demanding government shutdowns and investigations into Tony Rezko and the end to unemployment benefits isn’t going to look too reasonable.
@BGinCHI:
Seen ’em play! A friend of mine is a big fan. Fun band.
@freelancer:
Open your mind. Surely you are annoyed. Whatchew doing about it? Been out on the Mall in a scooter? No? Then what? You probably don’t even pay taxes. You freeloaders make me sick. Hey you know what is a surprisingly entertaining daytime tv show? Ellen.
@Violet: They’re still around?
Oh good, I feel younger already.
Christ, Cole. You’re in California. Smoke a joint already.
I know exit polling is a dicey thing, but some of the numbers are curious, at least
So they are pissed at everybody, but so far, no clear indication they are overwhelmingly voting republican. Except the tea baggers and their accomplices.
@Nick: And now you’re obviously just trolling.
@BGinCHI:
Yep. They’re even on tour right now. http://www.dashriprock.net/tourdates.htm
I know exit polling is a dicey thing, but some of the numbers are curious, at least
So they are pissed at everybody, but so far, no clear indication they are overwhelmingly voting republican. Except the tea baggers and their accomplices.
@Mako: Is freelancer also a freeloader?
And if he doesn’t pay taxes doesn’t that make him a Galtian superhero teabagger hero?
I’m cornfused at these unpossibilities.
@aimai: Oh, honey, you should have shot out the television. After all the lovely colonoscopy prep, and you have to deal with shit like that? Cruel and unusual. Burdensome and oppressive. Rilly rilly mean.
Oh man, John, my sympathies. That sucks, especially on an election day like this. Good luck wishes for the rest of the night.
.
@NR: No I mean it, I’m not happy I mean it, but I do.
The next two years Obama is going to be judged by the MSM, and in connection, by swing voters, on how often he sells out to the Republican majority. Because the media is corporate owned and swing voters are idiots.
That is, unless the left in this country actually start making some goddamn noticeable noise.
@FlipYrWhig: I certainly hope this is correct but I am skeptical. We have had wall-to-wall election coverage for the last few months and the good people of Nevada somehow haven’t realized Sharron Angle is a loon. I agree that the public will hate gridlock I just think they will blame both parties equally.
Well if Toy Story 3 is an analogy for the Obama administration is the open shot of punditry in the New Republican Revolution we should be in for an entertaining two years. How ever will the talk heads ever top a statement that dumb. Well I am sure they are up to it.
Toy Story 3 director responds:
@General Stuck: Here’s an interesting diary at GOS from a guy who was exit polled today.
@NR:
Yes, people want things that work, and that’s more important than “bipartisanship.” But, here’s the thing: when things _don’t_ work, a _lack_ of “bipartisanship” is a very convenient and appealing explanation. “Bipartisanship” is a shorthand or a nickname for putting aside “politics” and getting shit done. Is it actually that? Not really. But it’s a hell of a seductive theory.
So, sure, it would be stupid to take effective policy that could be passed in a partisan way and sacrifice it on the altar of “bipartisanship” to make it worse. I don’t think Obama does that; you seem to. I think that a critical mass of conservative Democrats fulfills the function of the other “party” with which mainstream-to-liberal Democrats have to compromise. And that’s why things get watered down in the way you and I both dislike seeing. I just think it’s the best we’re going to get.
deleted due to word press from hell
Villago Delenda Est: No, they sucked because of poor scripts and bad acting, but YMMV.
@Mako:
No, no, that is a good thing that dogs do. Do you want to clean it up? Sometimes their meals go down funny, and come right back up, but it’s still delicious to them, so waste not, want not, yay puppies!
Speaking of connecting two things, a disgruntled Vikings fan created this small masterpiece:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N2pcuLOk6Wc
Worth watching if you follow the NFL and need a chuckle.
@MikeJ:
True, your point is not unrelated.
@BGinCHI:
Is freelancer also a freeloader?
Easy to confuse the two since they both have “free” in them. Short answer, yes. In fact, freelancers are worse that freeloaders because lancer is gayer. Also, back in usenet days, I was well know as Pud Moistly.
@Mako:
Lolwut? The part that made no sense to me was a seemingly grudging admiration of the Teabaggers in your post:
One can believe virulently in nonsense, but it’s still nonsense. Passion alone is not a virtue, as for what I believe, I stated that case pretty clearly to everyone in my email contact list.
and your last five sentences are a complete non sequitur:
Do you suffer from some kind of emotionally triggered aphasia?
I’m wasn’t trolling, I was just truly bumfuzzled as to what you were trying to say.
@MattR:
exit polls are usually short and sweet due to catching people on the run after they finish voting. I don’t have a problem with just 3 questions, if they are the most urgent issues facing us, and those three seemed that way to me. I think it is time, as I have stated before here, for activists to get tuned in to what we are facing, and the niceties of issue activism comes in second to fighting the wingers almost exclusively, until further notice. We have something like a ideological cold coup going on in this country right now, and pet issues are just not the top concern. Especially non stop hammering your own side, and helping the other side with that hammering.
@NR:
I agree with you, but in the meantime, they do care, or at least pretend to.
Look to build that road or fund that school, we need to pass laws to do it, that’s where people want bipartisanship. They don’t understand that sometimes they can’t get it, that, yes, there are people elected, that they may have voted for, who want to NOT build that road or fund that school to stick it to the other party, and they refuse to believe that is true.
@morzer: Get me a Clay Matthews jersey and a bottle of scotch. Those two things are not unrelated. I didn’t think it was possible for one of those Hitler rants to still make me laugh. I think I may be more stressed out by today than I thought.
@General Stuck: Not disagreeing with you, but I also thought it was interesting to hear the actual questions being asked and the options that were available. It gives some insights into the assumptions that are going to drive the media narrative. (and makes me think that the exit polling is basically meaningless beyond recording purely demographic data) (EDIT: I would add that I am surprised that the war in Afghanistan was one of the three options for what people are most worried about, but terrorism was not.)
Oddly enough, this will be the same message if Dems DON’T get swept away in a GOP tsunami.
Funny how that works.
@FlipYrWhig:
Mr. Whig, you take the words right out of my mouth, almost always.
@kindness: I knew there was a reason I never fly American. I think I have subliminal memories of stories like yours. Sorry you had to go through that.
@Larkspur:
No, no, that is a good thing that dogs do…
Yes , I know, I read my Bible. Just doesn’t say anything about my gagging in there. But I suppose we could find some common ground, dog and me. He pukes on my shoe, i puke on his head, he cleans it all up eventually, we made them this way they need someone to love. Fuck cable guys.
@Redshirt: You want us all dead or something?
Go to the Giants parade tomorrow, and a sports bar tomorrow night. There won’t have been a celebration like it in San Francisco since VJ day.
@JWL: Better than Pride and the Bay to Breakers?
@Cris:
Are you suggesting it deserves better?
@stuckinred:
Better than the Folsom
Street Fairleather fest?@freelancer:
I like the desert pictures on your website.
I wish everyone was on the streets, with fucking pitchforks, but I’m too lazy and comfortable so , if you don’t mind, I’ll root for anybody who is on the streets protesting.
I’m wasn’t trolling,
Oh please. Every comment is a troll.
@CynDee: The bad part is a good friend of mine works for them and has for 20 years now. I had liked American before that.
It’s OK, the new ski stuff was an upgrade to the old and now I use Jet Blue. Yea it’s a cattle flight but it’s a non-stop.
@Nick: You put way too much faith in the power of the media, dude. I know you are in it, but the fundamentals of the economy will trump the media any day.
@General Stuck: ¡Gracias!
@Mako:
Thanks, my co-blogger is a shutterbug.
@stuckinred: Oh yeah. Way, way better…
ooh Willow Smith is on Ellen…
somebody’s been watching their Morning Musume
my favorite emosong just for u Cole.
Bloody November
You say I’m angry
Yeh pretty much but be glad I’m not exploding one off up in your gut’s
cause I could and if I could make an exit I would
I get a bad vibe ever since I moved back here
if you know me by now you know I’m far beyond the point of no fear
and I don’t give a fuck who can hear this anymore
I have tried and I’ve tried
till my dreams fell asleep at the wheel of some other guy’s ride
clean the knife
it’s gunna be a bloody november
I’m so hung on all the different ways I blew it
but I don’t need you to tell me just how much I should have known all along
maybe that’s why I wrote this fucking song
to tell you all I took a short walk off a long bridge for the long haul with a sign readin ‘looser went to Northridge Mall’
I hope you all get ready to fall
I have tried and I’ve tried
till my dreams fell asleep at the wheel of some other guy’s ride
clean the knife
it’s gunna be a bloody november
And when December comes and all the blood dries up
the snow will cover the tracks
I’ll never look back
I’ll start a new
And I know there’s something wrong
When I try and I’ll try
till my dreams fall asleep at the wheel of someone else’s ride
clean the knife
It’s gunna be a bloody November
@kindness:
American Airlines has fucked me and the mister over many, many times. Last time was on a trip to Costa Rica. If you Google “American Airlines Sucks” my blog post about it comes up #1. For reals. I must have struck a chord.
@JWL: enjoy!
lol Everything will about how conservatives really really are the total center of the universe. Everything is always about them.
Then when they get thrown out it will be due to thee fact they weren’t bat shit crazy enough and need to get more messed up in the head. Plus the elections were stolen.
Same old shit, different election year.
Can someone start an election FREAKOUT thread? They’re freaking out too much over a GOS, helped by the usual trolls. People really need to chill.
@aimai: did your gastroenterologist look like John Boehner?
I just got home from voting. I was only the 250th person to vote, and that was at about 3:15pm. Depressing.
I am holding onto hope for Mitchell, Goddard, Kotterman, Deschene, etc.
@FlipYrWhig: THISTHISTHIS
or, you know, what you said yesterday, which was just as brilliant.
maybe obama should just take out congress and then pass ALL THE LEGISLATION by himself.
@Angry Black Lady: w00t! All the time I spend here instead of doing my actual work/writing/research might be worth something after all!
Think you’re gonna need a bottle of Everclear. That limp-wrist stuff just ain’t gonna hold up tonight.
I think that is clearly a WTF moment in punditry. And with that, back to actually read the thread.
@FlipYrWhig: Oh dood. You amuse the hell out of me. I quoted you twice today: Douches gotta douche. :)
@Southern Beale: Cleek gets #1 for itunes shit.
Oh shit, I just double checked and he’s dropped to #2.
@suzanne: I’m blowing up! Move over Al Franken, the 2010s are the FlipYrWhig Decade!
I hear that MSNBC has called Indiana and Kentucky Sen for GOP.
Looks like it’s Senator Paul now, and I plan to never move to Kentucky!
All of those prayers to the Aqua-Bhudda have been answered.
Rand Paul is projected the winner in Kentucky.
@FlipYrWhig: I can get behind that. :)
I don’t know. As bad as it’s going to likely be electorally, I still don’t think it’s possible anymore to guess how this is all going to shake out longer term. Losing the House may end up being, in some weird way I can’t quite articulate, the better way forward. We’re in fractal non-linear territory now, the spiral of events tightens and tightens, and because I’m looking for a silver lining, I’m going to welcome this dead cat bounce.
/pollyanna
@lamh32:
Proving once again that people can be fucking stupid.
@FlipYrWhig: Of course he declared the ’80s the Al Franken decade when arguably the naughts were. He became a well known pundit and was elected to the Senate. So he had a decade, but he was 30 years off.
Which means your decade will be the 2040s. If we survive 2038 end of time.
Fuck you Kentucky, my growing up in state.
Now we all watch and wait to see if Rand Paul can find Washington DC on a map.
I voted this morning at 8am and was number 71. Driving by the school after work there were quite a few cars there.
Just saw an ad from a group calling itself “Citizens Against Government Waste.” It showed a Chinese instructor in the future talking to his students about what causes a country to fail. Magically, it is caused when they spend too much, raise taxes, and pay for health care. It ends with the class laughing because he says “Now they work for us.” I suspect we are going to see these for a while.
There were a number of failings in it, two being:
1. How the US is going to get out of debt without raising taxes is going to be interesting. They seem to think that all you have to do is cut “waste.”
2. No country has ever been taken over because of some other country owning its debt. They fall because they are physically taken over.
In other news, Harold Ford is still a dick:
http://thinkprogress.org/2010/.....-tax-cuts/
Well that didn’t take long — polls closed for all of 4 minutes and WaPo has called KY for Rand Paul.
This is going to be a long night.
@General Stuck:
can I just say, that my greatest wish now that that idiot has won, is that he makes Mitch McConnell’s life a living hell. He election will already make Dems life harder, but if he bombs good ole Mitch too, that will just be icing on the cake!
I’m afraid that the night is not off to a good start for you, liberals.
Paul has won in Kentucky…Coats has won in Indiana…and nine Republicans have won House seats vs. only one Democrat…and in the two tossup races so far, you’re far, far behind.
How’s that “35 seat cap” working out for you?
Do try to respond in a mature, adult manner rather than with childish taunts.
Delurking to say Gah. The “what does it all mean” phase will be so more awful than usual. My strategy for the night is to drink. Heavily. Making some headway already. +2
When the chips are down, Rand Paul will STFU and vote exactly the way
Rush LimbaughMitch McConnell tells him to vote. Nevertheless, I’m betting he’ll be saying things in the meantime that will embarrass a large portion of the people in Kentucky to tears. The quotes on the press wires are going to be comedy gold.@lamh32: I haven’t followed Rand Paul’s positions… is he at all a war-and-military skeptic like his Pa? Because that might be interesting.
@Cris:
Maybe I should read it, then. Currently my grand prize for ‘shittiest cinematic review’ goes to the Salon reviewer who complained that Ponyo On The Cliff By The Sea suffered because Miyazaki focused too much on the ‘little girl’ aspect.
@change: What are you gonna do if we don’t? Curb stomp us?
@change: Yup, that strawberry rhubarb pie is definitely past its sell date.
But Patrick Leahy won :)
I do have to wonder what Rand Paul would have needed to do to lose that election.
@change: Surely childish taunts to political rivals have no place here.
This election needs it’s own song for democrats
early Joan Baez
@change:
Then how about a smack up side the head
@FlipYrWhig: I don’t think he even has any positions, other than to get himself a cushy job in the nation’s capital and fuck with Democrats.
@change:
Son, you really have to practice the scary imagery thing. I don’t mind being trolled by you, but I just wish you’d get your shit together and work on the quality issues.
@change:
Your girl sez, “Hi.”
http://www.flickr.com/photos/s.....455926300/
Boring predictable troll is boring and predictable.
@MattR:
A Republican won in Kentucky? Well, there’s an epic surprise!
Why all the misery? Republicans were supposed to win a million seats in the house. Exit polls are showing that at the very most, they take 50. That means not losing the House may be within grasp – particularly when the litigation ends, and yes, there will be litigation – and the Senate definitely isn’t lost.
Bottom line: The Repukes had a historical advantage in the polling and managed to step on their dicks.
Rejoice! They and their base may be evil, bigoted motherfuckers, but they are still world class incompetent boobs. We’ll get ’em in 2012.
Not even a cabdriver story and this is supposed to be analysis? You’re not a VSP, obviously. Drink up, and hope for the best. All is not yet lost. That said, I’m shit-scared at present.
@morzer: Heh. I was about to type that in response to change.
@MattR:
to be a Democrat
@MattR:
It’s really a shame to see a potential troll making so little of his material. Hasn’t he even dipped into Revelation or Leviticus?
General Stuck, thank you. That was a great song choice.
Someguy, I’m with you. Increasingly convinced Tea party takeover of the GOP will only help the Dems in 2012. The trick is going to be to make them understand they need to move left to win.
@Ash Can: I feel like both Paul and Miller are essentially wingnut bloggers. It’s like electing Steven Den Beste and Vox Day.
@newhavenguy:
Dude, if you’ve survived New Haven, a short-term crazyfarm Republican mob renting space in the House is a mere belch in the great hangover of life.
@morzer: Quake in fear after Republicans win House seats in Georgia.
@change: Nice job change, your self-congratulation is richly deserved!
Seriously though, wouldn’t you rather be celebrating with other conservatives? If you had a professional rival at the office whose wife was diagnosed with cancer would you do an endzone dance?
@morzer: I know, all he does is talk about strawberry rhubarb pie!
I found the REAL meaning of Toy Story 3:
Toys are happier being owned by Andy and other humans than when they are self-governing. In a sense, the toys are not ready for self-government and require a responsible human to watch over them and keep them safe from each other and the outside world.
This situation is highly reminiscent of the arguments against EMANCIPATION OF THE SLAVES. Freed slaves were not responsible enough to live on their own, and were better off being owned (this was one of Thomas Jefferson’s rationales for keeping his slaves while simultaneously declaring that all men were created equal under God).
One of the screenwriters for Toy Story 3, Michael Arndt (in his FIRST ever screenplay for Pixar), went to high school in VIRGINIA. Clearly, then, by my impeccable logic, Toy Story 3 is not merely an entertaining children’s film, but a subversive piece of NEO-CONFEDERATE PROPAGANDA aimed at reintroducing the idea of benevolent slavery to the United States.
So the author of the column is right that the popularity of Toy Story 3 may have contributed to the Democrats’ electoral woes today. But the reason, then, is not fear of a socialist state. No, the real reason is much worse – Toy Story 3 motivated unconscious racism in its audience members that convinced them to vote against Obama, and by extension the Democrats, during these midterm elections, in hopes of putting the President in his proper place.
Clearly, the subliminal messages in Toy Story 3 have the potential to cause great harm, and the federal government should consider banning access to this traitorous, deceptive, racist film before it further corrupts the minds of America’s sons and daughters into believing that slavery wasn’t and wouldn’t be all that bad.
Idiot Nation
I found the REAL meaning of Toy Story 3:
Toys are happier being owned by Andy and other humans than when they are self-governing. In a sense, the toys are not ready for self-government and require a responsible human to watch over them and keep them safe from each other and the outside world.
This situation is highly reminiscent of the arguments against EMANCIPATION OF THE SLAVES. Freed slaves were not responsible enough to live on their own, and were better off being owned (this was one of Thomas Jefferson’s rationales for keeping his slaves while simultaneously declaring that all men were created equal under God).
One of the screenwriters for Toy Story 3, Michael Arndt (in his FIRST ever screenplay for Pixar), went to high school in VIRGINIA. Clearly, then, by my impeccable logic, Toy Story 3 is not merely an entertaining children’s film, but a subversive piece of NEO-CONFEDERATE PROPAGANDA aimed at reintroducing the idea of benevolent slavery to the United States.
So the author of the column is right that the popularity of Toy Story 3 may have contributed to the Democrats’ electoral woes today. But the reason, then, is not fear of an effeminate, unbridled welfare state. No, the real reason is much worse – Toy Story 3 motivated unconscious racism in its audience members that convinced them to vote against Obama, and by extension the Democrats, during these midterm elections, in hopes of putting the President in his proper place.
Clearly, the subliminal messages in Toy Story 3 have the potential to cause great harm, and the federal government should consider banning access to this traitorous, deceptive, racist film before it further corrupts the minds of America’s sons and daughters into believing that slavery wasn’t and wouldn’t be all that bad.
@sven: Conservatives don’t want change. You should know that.
@MattR:
Whatever next? A Republican senator from Mississippi? If these shocks to the system don’t cease, God only knows what the consequences will be.
Proving even more that Republicans represent a fresh start, OH just elected Bush budget director (or was it trade representative?) Rob Portman. Why was Lee Fisher such a debacle of a candidate? Martha Coakley syndrome?
@morzer: My biggest fear is that we are going to get a Senator from Alaska whose last name begins with “M”.
@FlipYrWhig: Fisher had no money, but neither did Brunner, neither really caught fire. Portman was well respected in Ohio. A friend of mine in Ohio who voted for Brunner and didn’t like Fisher told me recently that Fisher “tried his best” but the support just wasn’t there. His messages just didn’t catch on. People liked Portman and have soured on Sherrod Brown
Portman will be ousted in 2016 I think.
@Omnes Omnibus: Nice
@FlipYrWhig: The next time a
conservativelibertarian shares his profound opposition to the Bush budget deficits Portman’s name may come up.@MattR:
I understand that Moron is a commonly adopted family name among the redstaters down thataway. It saves time on school reports and enables them to “win over” Democrats who write in “Moron” on the ballot out of sheer disgust.
@Belafon (formerly anonevent):
That’s another whackjob anti-tax group who consider just about all government spending to be “waste”, except of course when it involves dropping bombs on people who don’t speak English.
@Mako:
We could say the same of the guys who flew the airliners into the twin towers and the pentagon.
It’s foolish to think passionate belief itself is somehow a virtue.
@binzinerator: At least it’s an ethos.
@binzinerator:
We could say the same of the guys who flew the airliners into the twin towers and the pentagon.
Yeah, we could. We could say that they strongly believed in something and they are just like teapartiers. Or we could check out Ricky Martin on Oprah. Did you know that he is gay?
@lamh32:
Looks like it’s Senator Paul now, and I plan to never move to Kentucky!
I sure can see not moving to Kentucky for any reason whatsoever, but wasn’t that the point of the people who voted for him to want
anyone who looks like you to stay out of their narrow minded, little white world?
ETA I see that aruging @148 said it simpler and sooner
@Ruckus:
Dude, you ever been to Kentucky? Beautiful country.