The same part of me that wants to see a Republican Congress impeach Obama also wants to watch this show.
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by DougJ| 71 Comments
This post is in: We Are All Mayans Now
The same part of me that wants to see a Republican Congress impeach Obama also wants to watch this show.
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John Cole
You are sick in the head.
forked tongue
The same part of me that wants to eat a hearty lunch of ground glass sauteed in buzzard puke wants to watch that show.
cleek
i will not.
unless it’s a clip of her getting shat upon by a grizzly with lower G.I. trouble, i will not watch her show or any internet clips.
i do not need any more of that attention whore in my life.
Steeplejack
Oh, God, that does it. I will no longer apologize for The Good Guys or any stupid TV show that I like.
MattR
All I can say is, you hoser
dmsilev
Does she get eaten by a bear in the season finale? I’d watch that.
dms
JenJen
Dear DougJ,
Love you, mean it! But, seek help.
Fondly,
JenJen
JPL
Doug, They have pills for whatever ails you.
Rosalita
@MattR:
! My first thought too.
I used to love listening to the McKenzie’s
BR
Well…I guess I should start making plans to move to Canada.
DougJ is the business and economics editor for Balloon Juice.
I just like the idea of a possible president saying “this is flippin’ fun”. I thought only Mormons said that.
Emily L. Hauser/ellaesther
I think you need to sit down and shut up, because neither the impeachment-seeking Republicans nor the Palins need any encouragement! Dude, I’m begging you.
TheYankeeApologist
Then maybe you’d like this, also, too.
http://www.tmz.com/2008/10/09/get-a-load-of-this-whos-nailin-paylin-script/
JGabriel
Sarah Palin:
And I’d rather you stay out there, Sarah.
.
vtr
Next, TLC’s “Barack Obama’s Kenya.” Quick reminder: the “L” stands for “Learnin’.”
Cat Lady
Gosh, who doesn’t like seein’ a bad guy in a trainwreck? Also, too.
JPL
Well, Duh, everyone knows she quit that political job.
Poopyman
Just wait a couple of hours. That particular part of you will pass. Then you can wipe and flush. Problem solved!
Poopyman
BTW, shouldn’t the title be “Take off, eh?”
trollhattan
I’d watch it under one of two scenarios: being featured on an episode or either MST3K or “Beavis and Butthead.”
“Heh-heh, she said, ‘cockpit’.”
cat48
Well, you might want to visit TPM because they have a mailing that rethugs are sending out to seek citizen’s request for impeachment, you sick F@@@!! There’s just absolutely nothing amusing about impeachment of the first black president to me. Of course, I have an interracial family so our pain would be intense.
ThresherK
“I’d rather be out here bein’ free.”
Nobody’s stopping you. And you’ll get a lot farther from those tacky strip malls if you don’t drag that video crew around with you.
Honestly, basic cable, when was the sell-by date on this Alaska fetish?
SClaus
Dougj gets a lump of coal this December.
Pavlov's Dog
They can use this at Gitmo as the new torture video, I would confess to anything before having to watch that shit.
JITC
My personal favorite part of the clip: when she’s in their house yelling at one of the daughters “no boys upstairs.” Too little too late!
What does that have to do with Alaska anyway? Filming their family in their home lays bare the real motivation for this show.
But I suggest we all take her for her word and allow her to remain free and not stuck in a “stuffy old political office” – forever.
Steeplejack
@JPL:
Actually, that snippet may come back to haunt her if she ever does (pretend to) run for political office again.
Bob L
That still hasn’t been broadcasted by TLC? I heard when they showed to their sponsors the sponsors thought the show was a joke it is was so bad.
Still, if every episode was Palin being assaulted by various bits of the Alaskan wildlife that would be fun to watch.
theturtlemoves
That voice. My God, that voice. Hot needles to the ears would give a welcome respite from that “Duluth meets the Ninth Circle of Hell” accent.
jacy
I would only watch if it was a Most Dangerous Game scenario and she was being hunted from an airplane.
What’s up with TLC? Didn’t they use to have some kind of worthwhile programming? One of the kids was flipping through the channels and inadvertently stopped on an episode of the godawful Duggar family bullshit. By the time I made it to the remote control and changed the channel I thought I was going to have an aneurysm. They should just rename it the Crazy Poor White Trash Channel and be done with it.
Violet
Is mid-November a good time for TV shows? Seems like that’s right in the middle of the start of serious holiday season and people are busy with lots of other stuff. Is TLC seriously trying to pimp the show or are they trying to hide it?
It does correspond with her book release, though, right? Maybe that’s part of the publicity blitz.
arguingwithsignposts
@jacy:
The Teatard Living Channel – wouldn’t even have to change the stationery.
arguingwithsignposts
@Violet: november is a sweeps month.
someguy
@cat48:
Wow. So you took the Clinton impeachment pretty hard then?
jrg
I want to see a series where she antagonizes snakes and alligators and stingrays and shit like that.
theturtlemoves
And let me say I’m aghast that you would defile the cherished institutions that are Bob and Doug and their fine show and movie by associating them with Caribou Barbie. You, sir, are a hosehead. May a flying dog painted to look like a skunk crash your Octoberfest.
ThatLeftTurnInABQ
@cat48:
I don’t think it would be funny either, but here’s a thought: maybe that way lies the only plausible escape from our screwed up Zugzwang politics right now.
If the GOPers impeach Obama in the House and fail to convict in the Senate, perhaps that will give him both the incentive and the political backing amongst the majority of Americans to go medieval on their sorry asses. Maybe that is how we can get to a place where Obama can echo FDR’s “I welcome their hatred” and have plenty of white people look at the TV and with sympathy see not a stereotypical angry black man, but rather somebody with a superhuman level of patience and restraint who has finally and with massive justification had enough and isn’t going to take it any more.
I would dearly like to see Obama get in touch with his inner Jimmy Stewart from High Noon, and maybe this is what it is going to take. Otherwise, he may end up being our Gorbachev.
someguy
@arguingwithsignposts:
Same goes for the morons cutting trees, shoveling shit and so forth. I’d settle for calling that whole range of TLC / Discovery crap “R – Low Income Republican Self Esteem TV”
Violet
@arguingwithsignposts:
But it starts on the 14th of November. According to that link, the actual sweeps month is 28 October – 24 November 2010. A new episode is broadcast once a week, so there will only be two shows during that time period. The rest will definitely be during the holiday rush when most shows end their season’s run and holiday themed shows tend to predominate.
That leaves open the possibility for narratives discussing the massive drop off in ratings for her show…right as she begins her book tour. Is that the narrative her handlers are looking for?
Martin
Fucking liar. She’s worth $10M. She can be out there, bein’ free all she wants. She can recreate the fucking Ahwahnee out there in the backwoods and have her food flown in daily.
She’d obviously rather be on the wingnut welfare circuit, with her bendy straws, massages, and private jets because she can afford to do both and that’s what she chooses.
Origuy
There are not enough drugs in the world to enable me to watch that show with the sound on.
sven
General rule: When a person feels the need to discuss how amaaaazing it is to be doing X, they don’t do X very often.
Martin
@sven: I don’t know, I should think being able to debunk the premise of the show from the trailer should warrant some kind of penalty to the jerkwad that agreed to put it on the air.
kay
@cat48:
I’m with you. I had to stop watching during the Clinton impeachment. All the pontificating and sanctimony was making me physically ill, and that was just the media reaction.
I was turning down the sound on actual elected officials.
They turned that process into a clown show. In a very real way, Republicans and media took that provision from the people who own it (us) and made it into a joke. I don’t think it has the same power it once had. It’s one more political tactic in their arsenal. Just more bullshit they pile on, indistinguishable from all the other tactics. It’s effectively discredited as a serious process, which was probably the point.
catclub
@ThatLeftTurnInABQ:
“screwed up Zugzwang politics right now.”
What will the Zwischenzug be? Inquiring chessplayers
want to know!
How about impeaching THEM first! Ha!
jrg
@Origuy: Oh, God. Talk about a bad trip.
freelancer
Funny, that’s the same part of me that craves Nukyular Holocaust.
arguingwithsignposts
@Violet:
The first two episodes are the only ones that matter for advertising purposes, really. Every show gets a huge first-show audience. It’s really pretty shrewd of TLC to only put those first two shows in sweeps month.
vtr
I saw a spot on MSNBC during a Lawrence O’Donnell break regarding a Dick Morris cd-movie (starring eponym himself) about what a total failure Obama is. I didn’t catch who’s funding it. Anybody else see that or was it a bad dream?
eemom
@cat48:
This times a zillion.
Also nothing amusing about accusing a man of “high crimes and misdemeanors” who has committed no crime at all except trying to do the fucking job he was elected to.
Don’t mean to be inflammatory here — but if ever the phrase “high tech lynching” was justified, well, this is it.
There is, also, nothing amusing about how low we have sunk as a nation if something like that is allowed to happen.
Violet
@arguingwithsignposts:
Sorry, I’m confused. What do you mean by that? Not every show gets a huge first-show audience, does it? That’s why some shows do poorly and crash and burn early.
I don’t understand the ratings/sweeps thing much at all, so I bow to your greater knowledge. I’m probably totally wrong about it. Still seems like there’s an opening for a massive drop off of interest.
I also wonder how well it is going to do in general. Remember Sarah Palin was supposed to host some “Sarah Palin’s America” show on Fox? There was one of those that I remember hearing about and the ratings were poor and dropped off dramatically after the first fifteen minutes or something. I haven’t heard of there being another one.
I don’t know that she’s really that huge of a draw. Her Heroic Media tour isn’t drawing huge crowds, although people have to pay for that. And her Alaska show will have beautiful Alaskan scenery going for it, even if people have to sit through her stupid screeching to get to see it.
eemom
@kay:
I did not watch that shit at all, none of it. Though I have a very smart friend who said at the time “But it’s historical!”
gnomedad
@eemom:
Quite right. If they impeach, I hope it’s called a “lynching” early and often. The only good thing about it will be watching their veins throb as they try to deny it.
Brachiator
@vtr: I saw a spot on
So let’s see, Obama is the Master Machievell bringing Kenyan anti-colonialist Sharia soshulist dictatorship to Real(tm) America, or he is the hapless Jimmy Carter incompetent who can’t do anything right.
Totally contradictory, totally idiotic, and yet Toe Suckers like Dick Morris will bang either gong as hard as he can.
Anya
The level of hate I have for this vacuous woman scares the shit out of me. I was just fantasizing that she is eaten by a vicious bear or she falls off a plane while she is attempting to shoot some innocent animal.
I think I need to seek help. You too, DougJ! There is nothing at all healthy about your impeachment fantasy.
arguingwithsignposts
@Violet:
Sorry, I missed a word when editing there. I meant every show that has a lot of media buzz around it (and SP’s Alaska will definitely have that from the village, at least – plus all her Palinbots pumping the thing up through their facetweets).
Sweeps is when networks get a new “book” of numbers to present to advertisers. The more people they can get to watch during a sweep month, the more inflated their numbers look. This is why “Tornado Week” and “Shark Week” and “Hitler/WWII Week” all happen during sweeps months. It’s also why local news outlets run their “investigative series” during sweeps months.
So putting SP’s A on during sweeps will inflate TLC’s numbers (they hope). I suspect they could give a shit less what the show does after the initial couple of shows.
And, for the record, that show looks like a train wreck and a half. Like octomom with moar politics. I have no interest in watching beautiful Alaskan scenery if that lying harpie is on screen at the same time. ugh.
Violet
@arguingwithsignposts:
Yeah, it’ll have the buzz but might not have all the viewers. Remember the “Real American Stories” show (got the name wrong the first time) on Fox that I mentioned in a comment upthread? It must not have done well enough to order another one. She definitely creates buzz, but I’m not convinced she can bring in viewers. We’ll see, I guess.
Yeah, that’s probably their goal and it fits with publicizing her book that’s coming out. I still wonder if people will watch it. You can get beautiful Alaskan scenery elsewhere without having to watch that harpy.
Sarah Palin has a women problem. Women don’t like her. And TLC targets women viewers. It’ll be interesting to see if they tune in to watch her or are put off by her lying ways and screeching voice. I’m hoping for the latter but if there’s enough of a trainwreck quality about it, maybe not. Perhaps this is her attempt to improve her standing with women? Not sure it’s gonna work. Sarah Palin is a Mean Girl and women can see that.
arguingwithsignposts
@Violet:
I’m right there with you on all of that. I am mystified as to why TLC produced the show in the first place, unless someone figured it would attract rubberneckers in addition to the dedicated sparkle-boy audience who usually gets excited by snowbilly snookie.
I’m not sure, however, that I’d equate this with the “American Stories” debacle, as that was on Fox News, which has a different audience (red meat politics and fear). I could see more of the talibangelical audience being attracted to this “softer” reality show type stuff. Throw in some nods to Amurikun Jeebus, and they’ll faint over her.
And yeah, I’m hoping for the low ratings too.
Mothra
PSA:
No letter Gs were employed in the makin’ of “Sarah Palin’s Alaska”.
Violet
@arguingwithsignposts:
Yeah, it’s hard to say. “American Stories” was pretty heavily hyped all over the place, so even if you weren’t a regular Fox viewer you knew of it. Apparently it did no better or worse than anything else in that time slot for Fox. So she certainly didn’t bring in a bunch of new viewers and keep the old ones.
Her talibangelical audience will follow/watch her anywhere. They’re the ones showing up for the Heroic Media
moneygrabsappearances. For the show to do well, she’s going to have to bring in more than the usual audience for a TLC show, whatever that is. Maybe there are enough fundies out there to do that, but I’m not totally convinced.She has to get the regular TLC viewers to make this show work. Since she has a women problem, there are probably a lot of women out there who would watch a nice show about Alaska but won’t because they have to put up with that harpy. She’s a turn off, not a turn on. And her usual constituency, older men who think with their little heads, doesn’t watch TLC.
We’ll see, I guess. I won’t be watching. I won’t give them any ratings bump whatsoever.
debbie
@JPL:
Isn’t this good news? Can’t we take this to mean she won’t be running in 2012?
artem1s
two words. Jackie Robinson
also.too.listening to caribou barbie screech about the quiet tranquility of Alaska…I’d rather poke a 2B pencil in my eye.over.and.over.and.over.and.over.
Martin
LOL
Violet
@debbie:
Only if you believe she doesn’t lie. Since she does lie, and practically all the time about anything and everything, a statement like that is useless in trying to determine her plans.
Her plans are best guessed by watching what motivates her. And that is money and power, the second more for its ability to allow her to do what she wants, both for herself and to anyone, rather than any desire to rule the world or effect change. Sarah Palin is all about Sarah Palin, not any big ideas or world-changing concepts. If it doesn’t benefit her, she won’t bother.
Will she run? You betcha. It’s how long she’ll run that is the question, because Sarah Palin doesn’t do hard work. And ultimately, running for President is hard work. But she’ll run for as long as she can do the pageant contestant wave and give occasional canned speeches to hand-picked audiences and speak only via Fox News. If that’s all she has to do, she’s there. If the American people demand more of her than that, she’ll drop out, all while claiming how the “lamestream media attacked her family so much it made it not worth running” or some other victimhood-first statement.
Triassic Sands
Funny, the same part of me that wants to commit suicide is the same part that wants to (or would) watch that show. Fortunately, should the opportunity arise, I guarantee I’ll choose suicide first, thus sparing me from watching the show, which undoubtedly would just give me one more reason to off myself, in the event I needed one.
The odds of my killing myself are better than the odds that I’ll watch Sarah Palin’s Ego Trip.
Mnemosyne
@Violet:
I’ll be curious to see if she manages to last longer than Fred Thompson. I doubt it, because even trying to get votes in Iowa requires a whole lot of handshaking and rallying and meetings that she’s not going to be willing to drag her ass to. Celebrity name recognition only gets you so far.
Mnemosyne
And for people who say, “But W was lazy!” Sure, but he knew how to run a campaign, and he had a whole lot of support to help him do it. I’d almost say that campaigning was pretty much the only thing W was good at, and he seemed to like it.
Palin, not so much.
Elizabelle
OT (and I am NOT going to watch the trailer. Um, yet. Why make the number of page clicks fodder for how awesome Governor Sarah is?)
However:
Could it make a difference if we started calling it the Koch Brothers Tea Party?
1) Because it is, with rare exception, in philosophy (conservative think tanks) if not in direct candidate funding.
2) And because the NY Times is running this kind of asshattery and pretending the Koch Brothers Tea Party is an authentic “movement”.
Tea Party Set to Win Enough Races for Wide Influence
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/10/15/us/politics/15teaparty.html
This is the New York Times writing this crap. They mention Dick Armey’s Freedom Works in passing 13 paragraphs down; otherwise it’s all horse race.
Is Kate Zernike David Gregory’s pen name?
Tsulagi
Kinda funny the show will be put on by The Learning Channel. Maybe the learning goal of the program is getting a majority of wingnutters able to correctly point to Alaska on a map. Especially the ones living in Alaska.
Ruckus
It cleared the left field wall, it’s a bases full snark attack.
Either that or I completely missed your point. And if that’s the case please seek professional help.
debbie
@Mnemosyne:
That was my thought. She’ll never survive Iowa, if only because she runs the risk of being asked an actual question.
xephyr
I hope that’s a joke.. I don’t feel very good after watching that.