Somewhere around the time I cracked the second bottle of wine I started watching Blade Runner, and the scene where Leon was told “The tortoise lays on its back, its belly baking in the hot sun, beating its legs trying to turn itself over, but it can’t. Not without your help. But you’re not helping…” I yelled out “give the fucker a tax cut and tell him to pull himself up by his boot straps.”
I’m seriously psyched about all these teahadist victories, and I want each and everyone of you to vow to help me to never let anyone forget that the jerkoffs at Reason have been pimping the tea parties from day one. I wonder how Angle, O’Donnell, and Miller feel about marijuana legalization, John Stagliano’s occupation, torture, civil liberties, no-knock raids, warrentless wiretaps, military adventurism, and all those things you all pretend to care about?
Oh, you’re gonna get your limited government, Christian style, and you’re gonna get it good, you morons- I may even chip in for the wetsuits and dildo for you special cases at Hit and Run. I can’t blame crazy people for being bat shit crazy, but I sure as hell can heap some scorn on pricks like the Reason writers for running rhetorical cover for the lunatics and helping to mainstream their insanity (I know, I know- you don’t PERSONALLY believe Obama is a Kenyan!). Y’all might as well write for Red State.
I just hope you chumps lose the leather jackets and designer wayfarer prescription specs, because those look vaguely French. Your days of esoterically talking about the virtues of Ayn Rand at DC wine and cheese parties are over, because you’re now bitches for Real ‘Murrika. Yeefuckinghaw! Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition.