Fragrant candles

Colbert is going to have a great time with this:

“Largely decorated by Limbaugh himself, [his Palm Beach house] reflects the things and places he has seen and admired. A massive chandelier in the dining room, for example, is a replica of the one that hung in the lobby of New York’s Plaza Hotel. The vast salon is meant to suggest Versailles. The main guest suite, which I didn’t visit, is an exact replica of the Presidential Suite at the Hotel George V in Paris. There is a full suit of armor on display, as well as a life-size oil painting of El Rushbo. Fragrant candles burned throughout the house, a daily home-from-the-wars ritual.”






100 replies
  1. 1
    russell says:

    Dudes got issues. Just saying.

  2. 2
    williamc says:

    home from what wars? The war of him v. the buffet at Ryan’s Steakhouse? wtf?

  3. 3
    Rosali says:

    ok, I’m gagging at the idea of a life-size painting of El Rushbo

  4. 4
    Martin says:

    @williamc: The drug war playing out in the glove box of his car, most likely.

  5. 5
    Mike Kay says:

    man of the people.

    salt of the earth.

    also, too.

    funny, all that (including a hillbilly heroin stash) and chicks still won’t fuck him.

  6. 6
    Bnut says:

    I wonder how the new digs in Costa Rica will treat him.

  7. 7
    Steeplejack says:

    Gotta say it’s probably no different at Diddy’s house, except for the obligatory Scarface memorabilia. Hell, Limbaugh probably has some of that, too. Or maybe Wolverines!

  8. 8
    williamc says:

    this just reminds me that I had 1 oxycontin the other day, 15mgs, and a drink, and it put me on my ass and made me see stars for most of the afternoon…how did his fat ass put away so many everyday?

  9. 9
    Jim, Foolish Literalist says:

    Largely decorated by Limbaugh himself, [his Palm Beach house] reflects the things and places he has seen and admired….The vast salon is meant to suggest Versailles.

    Tacky, desperate, insecure wannabe-megalomaniac.

    In a similar piece from a couple years back, it was reported (“reported”) that his servants have a standing order to light those scented candles ten minutes before the Master arrives home. Seems to me it must have been in 2004, because I vaguely recall him calling John Kerry an elitist at about the same time the article appeared.

  10. 10
    handy says:

    @russell:

    Yeah it’s called being wealthy.

  11. 11

    It is amazing how much bad taste money can buy.

  12. 12
    soonergrunt says:

    @williamc: Well, the fat ass is a big part of that. That’s an awful lot of tissue to medicate.
    He took enough to destroy his hearing, anyway.

    http://dir.salon.com/news/feat.....index.html

    http://www.after50health.com/u.....-loss.html

  13. 13
    Punchy says:

    But where does he keep the young Dominican boys (aside from next to the oxy and Via’gra)?

  14. 14
    MikeBoyScout says:

    Wait a minute.

    Largely decorated by Limbaugh himself, [his Palm Beach house] reflects the things and places he has seen and admired.
    [snip]
    There is a full suit of armor on display, [snip] as well as a life-size oil painting of El Rushbo [snip]. ….

    Seriously? He hung a life size painting of himself because he has seen and admired himself?
    I thought he had ear problems, not eye problems.

  15. 15
    Warren Terra says:

    Someplace over the weekend, I’m not sure where (maybe in the New York Times?) I read a very sorrowful commentary about the Chafets book basically saying that a smart and talented writer had produced a piece of inexcusable hackwork and puffery, because while a good biography of Limbaugh might be interesting, a passable hagiography would ensure him access to his subject, was sure to make him a load of money, and would likely set him up to repeat the process with other luminaries of the right.

    And that last point, of establishing his credentials as the go-to guy for lazy hagiography, is probably pretty important: Sarah Palin has to sign her name to a book she’s never read every year or so, and once she does there’s going to be plenty of money for everyone involved. And just like many people are said to have a book in them, I feel certain that Rand Paul’s brand has a book in it.

  16. 16
    aimai says:

    As the frum turns.

    aimai

  17. 17
    Tyro says:

    “I relished his bravado, laughed at his outrageous satire, and admired his willingness to go against the intellectual grain.”

    Why is it that conservatives appear to have no idea what the word “satire” means?

  18. 18
    The Other Steve says:

    Frum’s interesting. He actually responded to an email I sent him about one of his articles.

    He’s someone who needs to be encouraged, although like a scorpion I worry he’ll prick the turtle taking him across the river.

  19. 19
    williamc says:

    @MikeBoyScout:

    sounds to me like he has a Scarlett O’Hara/Suzanne Sugerbaker complex…or a “make up stuff that you think a wanna-be Charles Foster Kane would have in his house and print it” puff piece…

  20. 20
    Joseph Nobles says:

    Man, this title really cries out for a lisp:

    Fwagwent cannels

  21. 21
    carpeicthus says:

    That sounds exactly like Saddam’s palace.

  22. 22
    kid bitzer says:

    but the wapo forgot to tell us the most important thing:

    does he cross his legs when he sits down?

  23. 23
    suzanne says:

    As a modernist, that description of his palace made me fuckin’ twitchy.

    The tacky, get it off me, IT BURNS.

  24. 24

    @carpeicthus: Or like Biff Tannen’s place from Back to the Future 2.

  25. 25
    El Cid says:

    @carpeicthus: It sounds like any tinpot cacique who made it big and wants to show his super-rich superiors that he can blow money just like them.

    It’s exactly like the tackiest of the hip-hop cribs shown on MTV where everything is about wretched excess.

  26. 26
    SpotWeld says:

    Take out the part where it says it’s owned by Rush and pretend he’s reading it in a derisive voice on his show… can you imagine the anticipation in a winger’s head as the wonder what elitist liberal would live in such a place so divorced from “real Americans”.

    Al Gore? Clinton? Kerry?

  27. 27
    El Cid says:

    Outside the house incident, there’s this:

    Limbaugh has skillfully conjured for his listeners a world in which they are disdained and despised by mysterious elites — a world in which Limbaugh’s $4,000 bottles of wine do not exclude him from the life of the common man.
    __
    Chafets also reveals Limbaugh’s expanding vision of his own central place and role within the conservative world. “Whatever feelings of inferiority Limbaugh may have had,” Chafets writes, “disappeared as he became better acquainted with the work of his fellow commentators. . . . While Limbaugh appreciated some conservative thinkers — including Justice Antonin Scalia, columnist Charles Krauthammer, and economist Thomas Sowell — he now clearly saw himself as the thought leader of the movement. . . . ‘I know I have the intellectual engine of the conservative movement.’ ”

    Having once heard a lackluster, non-insightful speech by Fat Tony Scalia, I’ve got to put Rush as their equals.

    And you can be any sort of snobbish multi-millionaire jackass, but if you comport yourself as a RealMurkan, than by magic you transform into a commoner, just like the super-ultra-elitist Bush Jr.

  28. 28
    asiangrrlMN says:

    You know who else has fragrant candles? John Cole. I’m just sayin’.

    @Warren Terra: That could be my in to the perpetual rightwing gravy train!

    @Linda Featheringill: No kidding. I shuddered at this brief description of Limbaugh’s abode. Ugh.

  29. 29
    rob! says:

    There is a full suit of armor on display, as well as a life-size oil painting of El Rushbo.

    I’m sure Rush puts on one, and masturbates to the other.

  30. 30
    Martin says:

    @kid bitzer: Given his girth, I wonder if it’s even physically possible for him to.

  31. 31
    soonergrunt says:

    @rob!: Well, he’s a right winger war fan who skipped out of his generation’s war, so I have to ask–just how do you see him putting on a painting, cause we all know what he’s doing to the armor suit…

  32. 32
    Adrienne says:

    @williamc:

    how did his fat ass put away so many everyday?

    I think you just answered your own question.

  33. 33
    Fern says:

    @asiangrrlMN: Here are pictures of his New York apartment. It’s dreadful, but it sounds like the other one is even worse.

  34. 34
    mistersnrub says:

    Sounds like a wonderful home that this closet queen will inevitably die alone in.

  35. 35
    Redshift says:

    @Tyro:

    Why is it that conservatives appear to have no idea what the word “satire” means?

    What do you mean? They know exactly what it means! It means “Of course I wasn’t being racist/bigoted, you’re just a humorless liberal who doesn’t get the joke!”

  36. 36
    Anne Laurie says:

    @rob!:

    There is a full suit of armor on display, as well as a life-size oil painting of El Rushbo.
    __
    I’m sure Rush puts on one, and masturbates to the other.

    Only if he had that armor specially hand-crafted to his overfleshed measurements, because the authentic versions were not made in Size XXXXXXXL, not even for Henry VIII. Of course, it’s unlikely anything in the Limbaugh pleasure dome is any more “authentic” than its owner (how many scented candles does it take to cover the stench of a rotting soul?). To update what Frank Zappa is supposed to have said about Ike Turner’s 1970s pad: “I never knew it was possible to spend $10,000,000 at Wal-Mart!”

  37. 37
  38. 38
    GregB says:

    Scented candle conservatives.

  39. 39
    Quiddity says:

    First (and so far only) comment at the Washington Post for that book review:

    Limbaugh is a charlatan of first rank. His status as such is secure, he does not have to agonize over it. Alas, the self-glorifying El Rushbo will die alone and unloved by any family or children. The legacy he will leave on American political culture will be the same as the legacy one leaves on a piece of toilet paper

  40. 40
    handy says:

    I heard Limbaugh’s a Mac user too. Oh did I just go there?

    Yep, I did.

  41. 41
    asiangrrlMN says:

    @Fern: Oh mah gawd. That’s worse than I had imagined it in my mind (and let’s face it, I have a pretty vivid imagination). The man who lived there is the voice of the common people? Oh just fuck me now with a rusty pitchfork.

    @Quiddity: DougJ, is that you???? (The commenter).

  42. 42
    Scamp Dog says:

    The vast salon is meant to suggest Versailles.

    That just about says it all, doesn’t it? I can’t wait for 1789.

  43. 43
    Martin says:

    @Fern: Looks like he hired one of Trump’s decorators.

  44. 44
    Martin says:

    @handy: Yeah, Dubya is a Mac user too. What can do you?

  45. 45
    feebog says:

    Just gotta be rose petals delicately scattered in the toliets too, also.

  46. 46
    mai naem says:

    ooh la la El Rushbo, il aimes les francais. Versailles, George V… Qu’allons nous faire? French fries??? libertes pommes de terres?

  47. 47
    Jim, Foolish Literalist says:

    @mai naem: Heh. I had the same thought. Won’t all those dittoheads be shocked that El Lard-Bo prefers the cafés and boulevards of Gai Paree to the wholesome family entertainments of Branson?

  48. 48
    Bill E Pilgrim says:

    @Fern: Yipes.

    Why does the phrase “Give those nymphs some hooters” come to mind here….

  49. 49
    Redshift says:

    @Anne Laurie:

    how many scented candles does it take to cover the stench of a rotting soul?

    Anne Laurie wins the thread.

  50. 50
    Yutsano says:

    @asiangrrlMN: I’d already seen a couple of those photos, yeah ostentatious doesn’t even begin to describe it. But what the hell else is a thrice divorced fat ass with little to no charitable spirit going to do with $400 million dollars? (That incidentally is bankrupting his employer.)

    Howdy y’all. I pulled through decently.

  51. 51
    asiangrrlMN says:

    @Yutsano: Yutsy! Good to see you survived the surgery. Well, I can think of many things. Charity, traveling, books, black cat sanctuary to name a few….Oh, I missed the no charitable spirit part. You’re right. Ostentatious tackiness it is!

  52. 52
    Martin says:

    @Yutsano: Hey! Good to see you, and spelling all the words correctly! Did the surgeons toss in any upgrades like a robotic duodenum or laser beams coming out your eyes or anything cool like that?

  53. 53
    Calouste says:

    @Anne Laurie:

    Only if he had that armor specially hand-crafted to his overfleshed measurements, because the authentic versions were not made in Size XXXXXXXL, not even for Henry VIII.

    They did actually make them XXXXXL for Henry VIII:

    Picture of his last armour at the end of the article

    Earlier armor for Henry VIII was only XXXXXL in one peculiar department.

  54. 54
    Martin says:

    @Calouste: Wow, we always think of Henry VIII as fat, but that barely qualifies as husky these days.

  55. 55
    asiangrrlMN says:

    @Martin: That’s just what I was thinking. Rush could eat two Henry VIII and still have room to spare.

  56. 56
    Yutsano says:

    @asiangrrlMN: The man is going to have a mausoleum constructed when he dies so others can bask in the greater glory of him Life to Rush is all about Rush period. All else is commentary.

    @Martin: I should have thought to ask for something like that. As it was I spent more time in recovery than in the surgery itself. Now I’m just dealing with the pain (which isn’t too bad now but I’m afraid it’s gonna hit me harder tomorrow) and relaxing for a day or two from work.

  57. 57
    fucen tarmal says:

    the beautiful thing, in this case, about heroin abuse is that the body strives for a way to sense the pain that the oxy contin blocks, thus the nerve endings of a habitual user like limbaugh will sickle and exaggerate and advance his susceptibility to pain….i hope, in this sense limbaugh lives a long, long life.

  58. 58
    asiangrrlMN says:

    @Yutsano: There was actually a little part of me that felt sorry for Rush after viewing those pictures. He must be so fucking empty inside. However, I squelched that part of me so I can go back to being appalled and horrified by the carwreck that is Limbaugh.

    @fucen tarmal: Really? You just made me smile a bit. That effectively kills the sympathetic to Rush part of me.

  59. 59
    Yutsano says:

    @asiangrrlMN: Name me one good for society Rush Limbaugh has done. Just one. Go ahead I’ll wait. While your brain is straining to come up with an example, let me remind you of all the damage he has done> To wit:

    “I hope he fails”

    Saying Donovan McNabb only has a job as a starter because he’s black

    Dismissing his racist commentary by insisting he is only joking

    Becoming a drug addict himself while condemning poor non-white drug addicts to long prison sentences with no chance of rehabilitation

    That’s just off the top of my head. He’s a pustule on the ass of our society.

  60. 60

    @asiangrrlMN:
    I honestly don’t try to think anything about what drives Rush. I don’t want to know and don’t want to put my mind in a position to understand that kind of mess. It requires empathy to get enough insight to to understand. Nope.

  61. 61
    asiangrrlMN says:

    @Yutsano: Oh, I know. I just feel sorry for him the person because he’s such a complete and utter waste of space with no there there. Still, he has his millions and women who apparently have no qualms about sleeping with him (ugh), so whatever.

    @Chuck Butcher: Yeah. It’s a slippery slope because with someone like Rush, it would be too easy to get sucked in and not find your way out again. Unfortunately, my mind works in such a way that I try to figure out what makes people tick.

  62. 62
    bago says:

    @Martin:I doubt Yutsano has the funding of The Illusive Man.

  63. 63

    @asiangrrlMN:

    You know who else has fragrant candles? John Cole. I’m just sayin’.

    Hmmm, do you think that Rush is into naked mopping too? Naaaahhh, he’s got a staff for that.

  64. 64
    asiangrrlMN says:

    @Wile E. Quixote: Staff…naked mopping…Rush…UGH!

    @Wile E. Quixote: I like the blend of Nietzsche and LOLCat speak.

  65. 65

    @Chuck Butcher:

    I honestly don’t try to think anything about what drives Rush. I don’t want to know and don’t want to put my mind in a position to understand that kind of mess. It requires empathy to get enough insight to to understand. Nope.

    Good plan. Remember what Nietzsche said about that sort of thing: “Battle not with wingnuts lest ye become a wingnut and if ye gaze long enough into teh stoopid, teh stoopid gazes also into you.”

  66. 66
    Yutsano says:

    @Wile E. Quixote: There is not enough brain bleach in existence to scrub that mental image from my mind. You shall be receiving my therapy bills forthwith.

  67. 67
    fucen tarmal says:

    @asiangrrlMN:

    opioid induced hyperalgesia.its not well understood, we haven’t had many rich junkies to study, i can imagine, if he is off the stuff, he probably isn’t too comfortable.

  68. 68
    Warren Terra says:

    to be fair to Hank The Eight (Divorced, beheaded, died! Divorced, beheaded, survived!), he was a great athlete as a young man (horses, hunting), and got fat after a bad sports injury benched him.

  69. 69
    asiangrrlMN says:

    @fucen tarmal: My god. The evil part of my heart is inordinately happy about this. How you doing? You safe?

  70. 70
    gocart mozart says:

    a life-size oil painting of El Rushbo.

    Thing must be huge!

  71. 71

    @Yutsano:

    There is not enough brain bleach in existence to scrub that mental image from my mind. You shall be receiving my therapy bills forthwith.

    You know, some people have to do serious drugs to think of things like that, not me though, things like that just pop into my head. What can I say? It’s a gift.

  72. 72

    Damn, I put the words oⅹyⅽoⅾone and Ⅴⅰⅽoⅾⅰn into a post without using my way cool surefire way of getting them past the moderation filter and am now in moderation Hell.

  73. 73
    Yutsano says:

    @Wile E. Quixote: You must use your powers for good sir. Anger, fear, hatred, the Dark Side are they.

    BTW hate to cut this short especially after being zoned out all day but I don’t think anesthesia is totally out of my system yet. So I’ll find y’all on the morrow.

  74. 74
    fucen tarmal says:

    @asiangrrlMN:

    i’m safer than a nun in a condom factory. how is life up north?

  75. 75
    asiangrrlMN says:

    @fucen tarmal: HOT! Nineties and muggy. Ugh. Glad you’re safe.

    @Yutsano: Night, hon. Sleep well.

  76. 76

    @fucen tarmal:

    opioid induced hyperalgesia.its not well understood, we haven’t had many rich junkies to study, i can imagine, if he is off the stuff, he probably isn’t too comfortable.

    Hmmm, do you think we’d have a better understanding of the phenomenon if we vivisected Rush? I know that some people might find that a bit drastic, but damnit! You can’t have a science omelette unless you’re willing to break a few science eggs! And don’t any of you sissies try to tell me that we could have the science omelette if we used a science egg substitute because that stuff is nasty.

    Of course if we did this we wouldn’t be able to give him any analgesia. Doing so might affect the study, and since he’s an addict giving him painkillers could just lead him back into the downward spiral of addiction.

  77. 77
    asiangrrlMN says:

    @Wile E. Quixote: I like the way you think, good sir!

  78. 78

    @Yutsano:

    There is not enough brain bleach in existence to scrub that mental image from my mind. You shall be receiving my therapy bills forthwith.

    Does this mean that you don’t want to hear my speculations about how the scented candles are made from the waxy buildup harvested daily from between Limbaugh’s many folds of fat?

  79. 79
  80. 80

    @Wile E. Quixote:
    I don’t post those kind of meanders my mind takes, people might … well, commitment occurs.

    I once looked into something and something looked back… shouldn’t have done that.

  81. 81
    Lisa K. says:

    @Linda Featheringill:

    It is amazing how much bad taste money can buy.

    The only guy we know who can spend a million bucks at Wal-Mart…

  82. 82
    WereBear says:

    @Anne Laurie: how many scented candles does it take to cover the stench of a rotting soul?

    That’s poetry, that is.

  83. 83
    J says:

    As I picture it, entering the Limbaugh Manse is like entering the compound of the South American dictator in the In Laws (that 70s movie of fond memory with Peter Falk and Alan Arkin). If only the life-size painting were in velvet!

  84. 84
    pk says:

    Still, he has his millions and women who apparently have no qualms about sleeping with him (ugh), so whatever.

    This to me is one of life’s greatest mysteries. A man may look like a leprous gargoyle on the outside and be a soulless creep on the inside, but there will always be a woman willing to sleep with him.

  85. 85
    Sheila says:

    It is fitting that Rush Limbaugh quotes Versailles in his home, as Versailles was built by a king who required his courtiers to wait outside while he performed his morning defecation, which they then admired and carried away in a precious vessel.

  86. 86
    WereBear says:

    @Sheila: And the radio station analogy just writes itself.

  87. 87
    canuckistani says:

    @carpeicthus:

    At the risk of Godwinning, it made me think of Carinhall, late in the war, and it’s perfumed, drug-addled owner.

  88. 88
    Jose Padilla says:

    Heard an NPR interview with Chafets this morning. The NPR guy gave Chafets a blow job, I guess in honor of the blow job Chafets gave Limbaugh. They spoke for a couple of minutes about how Limbaugh is “stone deaf” without once mentioning that this is because of his massive drug abuse. Amazing. i guess if you work in radio it’s a smart career move to be on the good side of Rush Limbaugh.

  89. 89
    BC says:

    @Jose Padilla: Yeah, I had to turn the radio off when that interview came on.

  90. 90
    Sheila says:

    @WereBear:
    Absolutely, WereBear. Metaphors have much more intensity than direct statements (because they compress several ideas into a packet), even if the person using the metaphor, in this case Limbaugh, is totally unaware of it.

  91. 91
    Mumphrey says:

    I know you’ll all think I’m nuts, and maybe I am, but I really feel sorry for Limbaugh. The guy’s clearly so fucked up, and I think all this loathesome shit he says and does is his way of trying to get through life somehow. I know he’s a turd, and a vile person, but still, I think he turned out tht way because of whatever’s wrong with him, and that’s what makes me feel sad for him. The worst part of it is that he doesn’t have to live that way, but I don’t think he’d ever do whatever he needs to do–what that might be I have no clue–to get better. He’s kind of tragic in a pitiful way.

  92. 92
    Randy P says:

    @Warren Terra:
    Sounds like he liked to eat though. But I’m impressed that he still apparently competed in jousting and hand-to-hand combat (according to the Daily Mail article) even with the big waistline. I’ve got to feel a little sorry for the horse under him in the joust though.

    There’s also a description of him (unsuccessfully) pole-vaulting over a ditch while chasing a hawk.

  93. 93
    Ash Can says:

    @Mumphrey: I don’t think that assessment is nuts at all; I agree that the guy’s pathetic. What’s worse, though, is that, in the manner of a super-slow-motion suicide bomber, he’s taking a goodly chunk of the nation out with him.

  94. 94
    Mumphrey says:

    @Ash Can:

    Yes, that’s true. It would be so nice if he could just fester away off by himself. I can’t even begin to think of the freakout that will come when he has his last big heart attack and dies. Man, those drones will be lost. Somehow, I just don’t see Sean Hannity or Mark Levin, or even Glenn Beck, taking his place in their sad, drab, wretched lives.

  95. 95
    Comrade Kevin says:

    From the article:

    When invited to play golf with Limbaugh, President Obama supposedly answered, “Limbaugh can play with himself.”

    WIN

  96. 96
    jake the snake says:

    The strange thing is that Limbaugh is not Nouveau Riche.

    His family are longtime Country Club Republicans.

  97. 97
    brantl says:

    He’s just such a classless sack of shit, that the rednecks think that he’s “one of them”.

  98. 98
    Anne Laurie says:

    @jake the snake:

    The strange thing is that Limbaugh is not Nouveau Riche.
    __
    His family are longtime Country Club Republicans.

    So were Dubya’s dear Bar ‘n Poppy. For that matter, the Sun King was the descendant of a certified saint noted for his piety & generosity to the poor. As with IQ, the heritability of “good taste” has been mooted but not proven.

  99. 99
    Quaker in a Basement says:

    My old roomie was a sports reporter back when RL was working for the KC Royals. Not surprisingly, RL was a laughingstock at media softball games.

  100. 100
    xian says:

    anyone else picturing Baron Harkonnen?

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