I’ve read this a couple times and I can’t tell if it is spoof or not, but here is the actual headline of a story at Christwire attempting to explain away the Rekers scandal:
You read it and tell me if it just a really bad attempt at excusing this away, or really good spoof. Obligatory link to the Onion’s classic “Why do all these homosexual people keep sucking my cock?”
The Moar You Know
The entire Christwire site is spoof, and well-done spoof at that. I laugh every time I go there, particularly at the commenters who haven’t figured it out – no one does poutrage like a liberal.
MattF
Every time you think you’ve come up with all the keywords you need to cover winger craziness, they bust open a new one. “Is it satire?”
Asshole
You travel to Spain with the baggage carriers you have, not the baggage carriers you wish you had.
Bob
I’m voting for spoof.
ppcli
Obviously a spoof. Among other things – advertising as a positive his imputed opposition to native american adoptions.
Ned R.
Considering some of the other headlines there…
Yutsano
That is some serious first-class spoofery right there. The worst argument you can make is to present all the evidence to the contrary then only make this argument in return:
How to put this in a word…NO.
The Grand Panjandrum
Oh come on! With a post like this and you thought it was serious? Every post is LOL funny. Jesus!
Here’s another one:
I Only Have 14 Friends on Facebook, Does That Make Me Exclusive or Lonely?
David
I’ll never forget when the Mark Foley scandal occurred, one of the Wingnut blogs argued that the underage boys were merely “adults from the future.”
Derek
I had a feeling this was true after looking at the other articles linked to the right of the content. Damn well-done, though, you almost can’t tell.
What’s that rule/law that when talking about conservatives, it’s impossible to tell if something is satire or not? It’s escaping me right now.
Yutsano
@Derek: Poe’s Law. This seems a great example of that.
fucen tarmal
the adjectives were too funny, no way some hardened righty closet case writes that by way of explanation, personal diary maybe, but not for print.
asiangrrlMN
That’s funny as hell. Seriously first-grade spoofery. I will have to check out the entire site–after tai chi!
@Yutsano: Hi, hon! So we meet again!
Cameron
That Onion bit always makes me think of the scene from Brain Candy with Wally and the therapist:
Wally: Doctor, why do those types
[motions with hands]
Wally: keep thinking that I’m one of them?
Psychiatrist: Well, Wally, because you are one of them. You are gay. You are gay. You are a homosexual. The opposite of straight, you’re gay. I know it. Your family knows it. DOGS know it! Everyone seems to know it except you.
Derek
@Yutsano:
That’s it, thanks.
Seconding that the obvious “this is a spoof” moment was the Native American adoption joke.
Bill E Pilgrim
I don’t know, but looking at those photos, if you’re a gay rent boy, having sex with George Recker could make you straight.
Or since it doesn’t work that way, perhaps asexual, or psychosomatically-neutered, from emotional trauma.
I wonder if his hairpiece leaves cheesecloth burns. Yikes.
Joe Bauers
“You know how I know you’re gay? Because you have sex with men.”
Yutsano
@Bill E Pilgrim: Considering what Julien does for a living, Reckers was probably one of his easier clients. Plus the exact sex described was pretty tame by Larry Craig standards.
Jules
hahahahahaha
The comments are great:
“God bless this Christian Soldier, Dr.Rekers.
He took a ten day vacation with this dangerous sodomite to warn him of his heathen actions. I can only imagine how difficult it was those first couple of days when Rekers was still wrestling Satan from this infected youth. But once he sucked all the evil out of this lad, Geo is now free to return to a life of Christ’s love. No longer will Geo be tempted by suculent man-parts or lies of the holocaust.
Praise Dr. Rekers for pumping this former-homogay full of Christ’s love!”
and yeah, spoof site.
kommrade reproductive vigor
Also2:
Mexican Create Secret “Gringo” Masks To Blend In
Big flashing neon signs with large swoopy arrows point to yes.
Maybe the folks at Landover Baptist have decided to diversify.
Brachiator
It’s great spoof. But when Catholic bishops announce that teens can burst out with the spontaneous gay, we are rapidly approaching the point where spoofery and reality will collide like matter and anti-matter coming together.
And so, this stuff out-onions the Onion, because you have an archbishop essentially saying that you must discriminate against gays in order to prevent priests from being seduced into become child rapers.
And of course, to make sure that he has all his bases covered, previously, the archbishop went Full Godwin:
Proper Gander
Gettin the shaft again…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MCimI9QUtc0&feature=PlayList&p=1D6CED77FBBBC173&playnext_from=PL&index=0&playnext=1
Somewhat NSFW of course
Persia
Good to know someone’s taking Jon Swift’s mantle. Man, he would’ve loved this.
Just Some Fuckhead
I had a friend that used to suck a cock periodically to make sure he still didn’t like it and hadn’t turned gay. Hell, I tried homosexuality once but I quit when it was my turn.
El Cid
I had heard of Landover Baptist, but not this one. Well done.
Just Some Fuckhead
This was my favorite Onion homosex spoof. It’s in the book too.
MikeJ
@kommrade reproductive vigor: Actually, in an earlier thread I posted a link to: http://www.deprofiler.com/
The Moar You Know
@kommrade reproductive vigor: I think it might actually be these guys, come back from the dead.
Joey Maloney
@Bill E Pilgrim: I wonder if his hairpiece leaves cheesecloth burns.
FTW
Elizabelle
Addition to Spoof or serious news category.
NYTimes profiles Joe Scarborough and Mika B.
….
Coffee still in your mouth?
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/05/09/fashion/09JoeMika.html?8dpc=&pagewanted=all
This from the Grey Lady, after a recent wet sloppy kiss to Mike Allen of Politico, DC’s morning king of the world.
Bill H
I can’t believe that no one has suggested he took that young man to Spain to teach him how to be straight.
GregB
How is Reker going to know if sodomy and gayness are evil unless he walks a mile in someone elses assless chaps?
Svensker
@Elizabelle:
So the NYT is saying Joe Scarborough is gay?
Also, too, Doris Day HAD killer abs.
Gaaaaahhhhhhh.
LuciaMia
So why is Reker’s against Native American adoption?
Svensker
@Bill H:
That has been suggested.
TuiMel
@ppcli:
Uh huh.
I was not too deep in before deciding spoof and the above description of the author pretty much sealed the deal.
MikeJ
@GregB: All chaps[1] are assless. It’s redundant.
[1]clothing that is, not chaps like blokes.
AlG
@The Moar You Know:
Yup. Reminds me of the old adequacy.org – they sucked a lot of people in on their comment boards too. I’m sure those guys are sitting there replying to gullible comments and laughing their asses off.
Xenos
I vote for spoof. Further evidence:
Even American fundamentalists are not stupid enough to confuse Hitler with Arius of Alexander.
Now if Beiber really was an anti-Nicean Christian who rejected the orthodox understanding of the trinity… that would be pretty interesting. As a revival of the most pwerful heretical movement in Christianities history it would freak the fundies right out. Maybe he really is a Vandal, not just a musical one.
JGabriel
@LuciaMia:
Miami Herald via BoxTurtleBulletin:
So, basically, racism. If it weren’t racism, he’d just want screening for substance abuse and mental illness.
.
Liberty60
I agree, well done spoof- my favorite comment from “Merican”:
Full of win.
Elizabelle
@Svensker:
One might call Joe S “Rock Hudson”, but don’t call Mika a Stepford wife.
The NYTimes goes there.
Even though, a few paragraphs down:
Joe and Rachel Maddow in the morning would be a much better quality show, and she’d make a better qualified foil.
Svensker
@Elizabelle:
Is anyone else reading this as repressed eroticism? No? ***slinks away***
AlG
@The Moar You Know:
Ah, I see my comment re adequacy.org was redundant.
I immediately thought of them too – the similarity is striking.
Ben
The best part is, they actually link to the Rent Boy site in the “article.”
Elizabelle
@Svensker:
Oh yes. They go at that dynamic too.
Nora Ephron:
Another Ephron quote:
Funny. I think that too. Although never about PBS Newshour. Or Fareed Zakaria. Wonder why that is …
Am thinking this story is part parody, right? I mean it’s got to be? Don’t it?
Joey Maloney
@Elizabelle: Coffee still in your mouth?
No, I believe that’s vomit.
Remind me, which of Rock Hudson’s personal assistants died of a mysterious head injury in his private office at a time during which his whereabouts could not be definitively established?
licensed to kill time
__
Mika always gives off more of a battered wife vibe to me. She acts like she’s scared of Joe. Not that I watch that trainwreck of a show anymore. I cannot stand that smug, smarmy, fleececlad ignorant and proud of it little turd of a scar, bro!
All those guys (Hannity, Rush, O’Reilly etc) have that same smug bully vibe. Blechh.
“Am thinking this story is part parody, right? I mean it’s got to be? Don’t it? ”
I was thinking the same thing while reading it, hmm. (can’t format properly in edit)
Derek
Ah, all these nice links to late 90s Onion content. In a way, I prefer that to the modern stuff: nowadays the world is so fucked up I can’t tell if The Onion is satire.
bago
With the “magic 8ball” reference, I think we’re going to need at least 3 more rent boys to be sure.
licensed to kill time
I have to add that while I was reading that article, we had a 5.0 earthquake here (SD/Baja) that shook my whole house. I thought at first it was a reaction to the drivel, but USGS tells me different!
Mother Earth does not approve of Mika and the Scar, it seems.
Elizabelle
NYTimes author went with all sorts of familial references, but never hit “battered spouse”, which seems most adept.
Elizabelle
Aha.
DougJ is running with this on “Pillow Talk” thread. Go for it.
Thoroughly Pizzled
Other Christwire classics:
I Am Extremely Terrified of Chinese People
Is Video Gaming a Threat to America’s High School Jock Culture?
nutellaontoast
I think this is sort of a perverted version of no true scotsman, where having sex with men no longer defines being gay. A true scotsman can apparently be born in Australia, now.
gil mann
From Christwire comments, the meme of tomorrow, today:
D-Chance.
Victims of a con are the last to admit they’ve been conned…
James Hare
Just a little tip: PNG compression is far better for preserving text readability. JPEG is particularly bad for text. In Windows Vista/7 you can save screenshots as PNG and it is the default format for Mac OS X. Since a far better compression method is available, it would be nice if the tech-savvy bloggers started using it. I know John asks a bunch of questions about tech, but most of them show he knows enough to do things like this right.
Rick Taylor
Definitely spoof.
__
__
It’s liberals not conservatives that make sarcastic references to the “liberal media.” A true conservative would make a similar jibe, but phrase it a little differently.
__
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Definitely spoof.
Mustang Bobby
Yeah, I think Christwire is parody. And really good, too.
Derek
Haha–hilarious! You can either “condemn” or “praise” comments on the site, rather than just regular ol’ thumbs up or thumbs down.
Amazing how many idiots they manage to snare in the comments, too.
Yutsano
@Derek: I wonder if our leaking the secret is gonna spoil the big joke. I hope not, cause this is classic.
chrome agnomen
@Elizabelle:
the coffee’s still in my mouth, but i’m left wondering just what’s in liesl schillinger’s mouth
James K. Polk, Esq.
The New Gay Stereotype
Oblig. Tom the Dancing Bug…
Xanthippas
I wouldn’t say it definitely makes you gay, but it’s enough to make somebody ponder it quite a bit.
Linda Featheringill
Several years after Janis Joplin died, her sister was reported to have said that Janis was not bisexual, even though she had sexual relations with both males and females.
I remember that at the time I thought the sister was sincere although I did wonder what her definition of “bisexual” was.
Regarding Janis, she probably didn’t want to miss out on anything.
Linda Featheringill
@Svensker: repressed eroticism:
The article itself seems to have a lot of unresolved sexual tension in the descriptions of the relationships on the show.
I think the writer has fallen into lust at least but I am not sure which of hosts he desires.
No need to slink away. Or, take me with you.
Blowriley
Rekers said that he didn’t know that “Lucien” was a gay prostitute at first but he probably figured it out when he found that his d!ck tasted like sh!t.
Polar Bear Squares
Lmao!
I’ve heard if you’re on top it doesn’t count ….. in prison.
tatertot
Christwire is obviously related to this site
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/
The best bit of landover is reading their mail – from those who take the site seriously, i.e. have a deep deficit of irony.
LP Steve
I’m surprised you haven’t pulled this post. The fact that you even suspected this might be for real calls your judgment into some serious question.