Gold, Women, Sheep

All I could think of when I saw this crazy Carly Fiorina ad was the Roger Sterling “Gold, Women, Sheep” ad from Colbert:

To be perfectly honest, the “Gold, Women, Sheep” ad made more sense to me.






74 replies
  1. 1
    Morbo says:

    “You know, I have one simple request. And that is to have sheep with frickin’ laser beams attached to their heads! Now evidently my cycloptic colleague informs me that that cannot be done. Ah, would you remind me what I pay you people for, honestly? Throw me a bone here! What do we have?”

    “A guy in a sheep suit.”

  2. 2
    aimai says:

    You are making that up. Its not possible. No. I refuse to believe it.

    Actually, what it made me think of, aside from some early Monty Python flying sheep, is that the entire of Political advertising seems to be built on the (perhaps sensible) notion of the Rebus–voiceover uses standard metaphors and images “literally set the stage” “budget filled with pork” “taxes going up” and the guy charged with building the visuals runs to stock footage: curtain goes up, pigs at trough, images of money being run off the presses. Its Rove’s news for “people who watch TV with the sound off” the message has to be delivered front, back, sideways and up the rear for the advertiser to be sure the viewer gets it. This one only makes a mistake by trying to stuff too much information (sheep may safely graze/ our flock/green pastures) with rapid fire images of politics and people played to fake Carmina Burana.

    aimai

  3. 3
    Crusty Dem says:

    The only way this ad makes sense is if the ad agency that produced it hates Carly Fiorina.

  4. 4
    Crusty Dem says:

    Didn’t the guy doing the VoiceOver lapse into a Boston/NE accent for a moment? Weird beyond weird..

  5. 5
    Guster says:

    @Crusty Dem: For more than just a moment.

    I think the ad is genius. I don’t understand it, but I’m convinced that Tom Campbell is a demonsheep.

  6. 6
    Jackie says:

    Is the message that fiscal conservatives are sheep? I am not really plugged into that movement but is that a manly, independent, rugged image?
    It seems more likely that demo would prefer to be big, manly, predator. Like a wolf maybe? Or at least a scary, demon sheep.

    Please let her win.

  7. 7
    The Republic of Stupidity says:

    I am… speechless… speechless I am…

    Is that thing real?

    Kinda ‘splains why HP did so FAAAAAAAAABUOUSLY well under Carly, huh?

    All that was missing was having one final sheep turn, look into the camera, and say “Tom Campbell is a baaaaad man… a baaaaaaaaaaaad man…”

    Poor Carly… still doesn’t understand that things on the innertubes are FOREVAH

  8. 8
    The Republic of Stupidity says:

    @Jackie:

    Is the message that fiscal conservatives are sheep?

    I think the real message here is that Carly thinks the voters are idiots.

    I am not really plugged into that movement but is that a manly, independent, rugged image?

    Only to fans of virgin wool…

  9. 9
    scav says:

    ditto to every statement above, esp. the sheer phythonesque quality of it all and the explicit reminder that voters are sheep. Kudos for being able to assert in a single statement that an outsider has a proven record of fiscal conservatism. Colbert’s really got a level to match.

  10. 10
    DanF says:

    That wasn’t parody? Wait. What? There was a dude dressed like a sheep with red glowing eyes crawling around on his knees. I saw that, right?

  11. 11
    aimai says:

    I think I may need to watch it over and over again. Its the only really funny thing I’m going to see all day.

    aimai

  12. 12
    BenA says:

    That commercial never ends…

  13. 13
    Jackie says:

    @The Republic of Stupidity: Oh god, you are a bad person, in a good way. My brain didn’t go there, but look again at the beginning. She is going for the sheep man love vote!!

  14. 14
    burnspbesq says:

    Speechless. If we are in for another ten months of this shit, I will surely blow my brains out before Election Day.

  15. 15
    Rick Taylor says:

    I suppose everyone here as already seen this political ad in New Orleans for parish coroner that portrays his opponent as Frankenstein?

  16. 16
    Keith says:

    I missed the part where Mike Gravel was supposed to throw a giant rock into a lake.

  17. 17
    Sue says:

    Now, see, this is the kind of thing I want to see. Only I want to see it in the context of a corporation, using its right to free speech, putting something like this out in an effort to “help” a candidate. The more we get of this the less likely anyone will take any political ad seriously.

  18. 18
    West of the Cascades says:

    If this is the state of political discourse in California, I’m petitioning the Oregon legislature to close the border and keep those crazy people OUT.

  19. 19
    scav says:

    FICINO leads to Finocchio (at least in my mind) which leads to this bit from QI (click here) which explains it and even has relevant sheep information. HA!

  20. 20
    tavella says:

    2:26 is definitely the most special moment in a commercial filled with them.

  21. 21
    GambitRF says:

    As the brother of a demon sheep man, I find the images in this ad offensive.

  22. 22
    Citizen_X says:

    I can report that this ad is even betterer with the sound off and black metal paying in the background.

  23. 23
    Jackie says:

    @burnspbesq: Really, I find it very cheering. A good belly laugh at an opponents expense is good for you!

  24. 24
    The Republic of Stupidity says:

    @Jackie:

    She is going for the sheep man love vote!!

    And no doubt, Li’l Ricky Santorum is all over the case…

    ‘Sheep Man Love Vote’… what a great name for a rock ‘n’ roll band…

    Oh god, you are a bad person, in a good way…

    heh… I like this… mind if I use it as a tag line

  25. 25
    evie says:

    Get the producer of this ad a job on The Daily Show!

    I’m embarrassed for them. And how ridiculous did that guy feel crawling around in a sheep suit?

  26. 26
    evie says:

    Plus, is it me or did that guy have a Boston accent? For a California ad.

  27. 27
    Ash Can says:

    I think the real message here is that Carly thinks the voters are idiots is a stoner.

    O.M.G. I am so glad I decided to watch that video. It was one of the best laughs I’ve had all week. A Boston guy doing voice-over for a Monty Python take-off. And this is supposed to be a California political ad. For Carly Fiorina. Who, by the way, isn’t even mentioned during the entire three minutes and 21 seconds of this brown-acid trip.

    @Crusty Dem:

    The only way this ad makes sense is if the ad agency that produced it hates Carly Fiorina.

    This. I wonder how much they soaked her for, to produce this. And she’s bitching about someone else not being smart with money?

  28. 28
    d0n camillo says:

    I like it. It’s so straightforward. Tom Campbell is a red eyed sheep fucker. I always suspected it, but it took Carly to so clearly demonstrate it.

  29. 29
    Evinfuilt says:

    So out of their own mouths. Fiscal Conservative = Tax Cuts Tax Cuts Tax Cuts, and nothing else. And the greatest Fiscal Conservative is someone who can run a company into the ground, I’m sure that’s just what California needs.

    So California is being destroyed by brainless Fiscal Conservative Sheeps, and the only Republican who realized you can’t balance a budget without revenue is being kicked out.

  30. 30
    The Republic of Stupidity says:

    And this is supposed to be a California political ad. For Carly Fiorina. Who, by the way, isn’t even mentioned during the entire three minutes and 21 seconds of this brown-acid trip.

    The only smart thing Carly’s handlers did w/ this POS – make sure Carly’s name isn’t openly on it…

    Hmmm… come to think of it… what’s that old apochcryphal political tale about LBJ suggesting they make his opponent DENY he’s a pig farker?

  31. 31
    Pangloss says:

    Only a real fiscal conservative would ship 28,000 jobs overseas.

  32. 32
    J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford says:

    I saw this ad yesterday at Wonkette. Sadly, I will never get those 3 minutes and 22 seconds of my life back again.

  33. 33
    djork says:

    OMG, that is the greatest political ad, ever. And I’m not basing that on efficacy, but rather hilarity.

    Did Mike Gravel’s ad guy turn Republican?

  34. 34
    Alan says:

    Because everyone knows tax cuts pay for themselves. A true fiscal conservative puts the budget into balance with tax cuts. Anyone who proposes to raise revenue by raising taxes practices voodoo economics–they live in a fantasy world.

  35. 35
    Pangloss says:

    The mixed metaphor as performance art.

  36. 36
    Genine says:

    Despite the sheep, I don’t feel like I’m in Kansas anymore.

  37. 37
    TenguPhule says:

    Why do the Wingers need women when they already have sheep?

  38. 38
    R-Jud says:

    @TenguPhule:

    Why do the Wingers need women when they already have sheep?

    Sheep can’t go out to the store for you when you want Cheetos and Mountain Dew.

  39. 39
    Bob L says:

    The bewildered sheep getting raised to heaven on a pillar and struck down by lighting at 0.25 is classic.

    This aid is following in the bold territory Paline blazed threw American politics; just become a one woman three ring circus and mesmerize your citizens with you incompetence.

  40. 40
    The Republic of Stupidity says:

    @Pangloss:

    Only a real HE-MAN fiscal conservative would ship 28,000 jobs overseas.

  41. 41
    Comrade Kevin says:

    Another funny thing is her attacking Tom Campbell as a “career politician”, when he hasn’t even been in congress since 2001.

  42. 42
    The Republic of Stupidity says:

    @Bob L:

    The bewildered sheep getting raised to heaven on a pillar and struck down by lighting at 0.25 is classic.

    Uh… that’s not just a ‘pillar’… speaking symbolically, mind you… what I want to know is why isn’t Campbell depicted wearing a wet suit, or two…

  43. 43
    The Republic of Stupidity says:

    @TenguPhule:

    Why do the Wingers need women when they already have sheep?

    No doubt a question Rush Limbaugh ponders daily…

  44. 44

    @scav: Thank you, thank you, thank you. Coke through the nose funny at that link. I sometimes worry about my turn of mind…but after watching this ad and that clip in succession, I don’t worry, I know.

    Also: this is the most wonderfulest, delightful, howlingly restorative piece of political public theater. I love it. Please, Carly, more of this. Hang onto these ad-makers. They the monstahs.

  45. 45
    Violet says:

    I love this ad. It’s the funniest thing I’ve seen in ages. I can’t believe it’s real. The guy in the sheep outfit at the end is outstanding. Who thought this up? Carly Failorina?

  46. 46

    It’s nice to see that Fenton, the Death Sheep from Hell is still getting work.

  47. 47
    brantl says:

    That is, without a doubt, the dumbest commercial that I’ve ever seen.

  48. 48
    Origuy says:

    @burnspbesq: Oh, it’s just getting started. In the Governor’s race, one of Meg Whitman’s campaign advisers sent an email to Steve Poizner suggesting that if he dropped out of the race, Whitman would support him for Senate in 2012. Poizner called it “bullying” and sent the letter to the FBI. The adviser is questioning Poizner’s mental condition. Link

    I worked for Carly after HP bought out Compaq. I think it’s interesting that HP’s Political Action Committee (a separate legal entity that is funded by employee contributions) gave $10,000 to Barbara Boxer’s campaign.

  49. 49
    Delia says:

    The real question is: who will vote for Carly after this classic?

  50. 50
    Nathan R says:

    Yeesh…I thought that was the Colbert ad, and was wondering where the crazy Fiorina ad was. I didn’t realize my mistake until I saw the “Paid for by Carly Fiorina” message at the end. I’m going to have nightmares about that sheep. It looks like it belongs in a Kubrick movie.

  51. 51
    twiffer says:

    that is really surreal without sound. demon sheep. just…wow. can i have some of carly’s drugs?

  52. 52
    Bnad says:

    The ad has the same metaphoric literalism seen in airport posters for consulting agencies like Accenture.

  53. 53
    The Republic of Stupidity says:

    @Delia:

    The real question is: who will vote for Carly after this classic?

    Uh… the Basque? Anyone from Utah or whose last name is Pendleton?

  54. 54
    Savage Henry says:

    I love the part where they say she’s a policial outsider AND a proven fiscal conservative. Wha??!

    Obviously, every single person involved with creating this ad was on mushrooms at the time. Perhaps if you’re on mushrooms it all makes perfect sense.

  55. 55
    liberty60 says:

    @d0n camillo:

    red eyed sheep fucker

    I nominate this for inclusion in the BJ lexicon, in lieu of FCINO.

  56. 56
    twiffer says:

    @Savage Henry: i dunno. i think i’d just be freaked by the demon sheep.

  57. 57
    Delia says:

    I used to live in California and I have to say, Barbara Boxer has been singularly blessed in the sort of candidates the Republicans have chosen to run against her. It looks like her luck is holding.

  58. 58
    catclub says:

    Bach’s ‘Sheep may safely graze’ is from the HUNT
    Cantata.
    I think of it as the first hunter safety ad – know your target.

  59. 59
    middlewest says:

    I think the voice is Robert Davi. He was in Showgirls and American Carol, and lots of other terrible things. I kind of remember seeing him do some wingnut ads before, but I can’t remember what for.

  60. 60
    Tazistan Jen says:

    Tom Campbell sounds like a sensible guy who would help fill CA’s fiscal gap. He’ll get killed in the primary.

  61. 61
    Comrade Darkness says:

    Are all republicans devolving into Palinesque word/phrase salads? “Increased deficits AND increased taxes” Huh?

    Ronnie Zombie “the government should never ever pay its debts” Reagan Lives! Which is why they never show her/his face in the ad, I guess.

  62. 62
    Dreggas says:

    @Origuy:

    Meg also has an ad out talking about “welfare reform” *rolls eyes*

  63. 63
    Nellcote says:

    Why is the elevated sheep in blackface?

  64. 64
    Blue Raven says:

    @Nellcote:

    Why is the elevated sheep in blackface?

    There are sheep with black faces and legs, but it is interesting that the only sheep to have them in the ad is the Tom Campbell pedestal sheep.

  65. 65
    Origuy says:

    @Dreggas: Oh, I know. I can’t stand her ads. She’s just mouthing the things that inspire the Republican base. I wish Campbell had decided to run for Governor instead; he’d be an improvement over the Governator and a damn sight better than that auction lady.

    Jerry Brown just better get moving and start his campaign or California’s going to be in a world of hurt, not that it isn’t now.

  66. 66
    Cheryl from Maryland says:

    For a minute there I thought I was watching a Veridian ad from Better Off Ted.

  67. 67
    Malron says:

    When the Sheepocalypse arrives, I for one will gladly welcome our woolly overlords.

  68. 68
    Origuy says:

    Demon Sheep Overlords would be a great name for a death metal band.

  69. 69
    whatsleft says:

    So, California Republicans are “sheeple”, and the acronym FCINO bears an unfortunate similarity to Fiorino. What else should I take away from this HI-larious video?

  70. 70
    Meyerman says:

    Can’t. Stop. Laughing. Thank you, Carly. Comedy platinum.

  71. 71
    Darkrose says:

    @middlewest:

    Robert Davi did ads in support of the various mandatory parental notification for abortions propositions in CA. He also did an anti-Al Franken ad during the 2008 MN Senate race.

    But he will always be Kolya in Stargate: Atlantis to me.

  72. 72
    Darkrose says:

    All I can think is that Carly’s trying to lock up the furry vote.

  73. 73
    Phoebe says:

    I was all confused, thinking, “why would anyone want to be a sheep?” and “who are those actors they keep cutting to, against the white background?” and then the demon sheep just blew those other thoughts out of the way. And then the rear shot of the guy on his hands and knees blew out the demon sheep. All is calm stillness now.

  74. 74
    Big Badger says:

    West of the Cascades wrote: “If this is the state of political discourse in California, I’m petitioning the Oregon legislature to close the border and keep those crazy people OUT.”

    Now you know why this Native Californian finally got terminal escape velocity and moved to Wisconsin in 2004. The next ad will feature alien sheep arriving in a spaceship with Vulcan ears. “Beam me anywhere, Scotty.”

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