Open Thread

CNN is still talking about Michael Jackson.

On our walk a couple hours ago, I watched Lily lick herself, sniff dog doo, nose around in some dead stuff, and as she was stick her nose into the crotch of another dog, it dawned on me: “She’s going to lick me with that tongue.”

And then I decided it was worth it and just kept a walking.

77 replies
  1. 1
    Dracula says:

    CNN is still talking about Michael Jackson

    Why, did something happen?

  2. 2
    JK says:

    CNN is still talking about Michael Jackson.

    Amy Goodman, host of Democracy Now, on left wing Pacifica Radio, was talking about Michael Jackson’s funeral. It was a brief mention but still it was fucking ridiculous.

    Last night the fucking NewsHour with Jim Lehrer aired highlights of the funeral service.

    C-SPAN is the only adult in the room among the MSM, for avoiding this Michael Jackson nonsense, and has my undying admiration.

  3. 3
    Nikki says:

    And then I decided it was worth it and just kept a walking.

    It always is.

  4. 4
    phantomist says:

    “Some things in life need to be mysterious,” said Noonan, adding, “Sometimes you need to just keep walking.”

  5. 5
    Creamy Goodness says:

    Wait’ll you catch her scarfing down Tunch turds.

  6. 6
    John Cole says:

    @phantomist: That is what I was referring to. I originally had “And then I decided it was worth it and pulled a Nooners,” but decided people wouldn’t get it.

  7. 7
    jnfr says:

    And I love Rachel Maddow for pointedly ignoring the whole thing on her show last night. Didn’t even mention it in her popcult segment.

  8. 8
    Andy says:

    You’ve probably noticed the similarity between the things your dog does and the things CNN does.

  9. 9
    gbear says:

    “She’s going to lick me with that tongue.”

    Don’t think she’s not wondering what you do with those hands.

    But then she decides it’s ok too.

    At least the MJ coverage on CNN prevents them from being wrong and stupid about something else (the health care debate, for example).

  10. 10
    David says:

    Kill your tv before it kills you.

  11. 11
    Cat Lady says:

    I let the cat who I know must have ticks snuggle with me in bed, increasing the likelihood of getting lyme disease. Oh well.

    I just watched the movie Bab’Aziz. How have I missed this til now? Flat out the most beautiful movie I’ve ever seen. Princess Bride meets Dune meets Siddhartha meets Walkabout meets the Little Princess about a blind dervish and his little granddaughter on a pilgrimage through the desert to a reunion of dervishes held every 30 years. The soundtrack will find your still center, and the Arabic sounds like poetry.


  12. 12
  13. 13
    wonkie says:

    I got poison ivy from my neighbor’s dog. It’s the fur you have to watch out for, not the tongue.

    Damn dog is a sheltie and he isn’t covered from head to to toe with itchy blisters.

  14. 14
    The Moar You Know says:

    One more day and then Michael Jackson will rise from his grave and go on a massive killing and brain-eating spree. And you know, as long as he confines his depredations to members of the media, I’ll be fine with that.

  15. 15
    cleek says:

    now would be a good time for everyone to start playing Plants v Zombies, just to get practice in killing Michael Jackson zombies.

  16. 16

    This just in: Michael Jackson is still dead.

  17. 17
    Max says:

    Not sure I’ve seen it discussed here yet, but is anyone digging the new MSNBC lineup? I don’t think I like this Dylan Ratigan guy. He’s like a poor man’s Chris Matthews with his shouting at his guests and monopolizing their interviews. I guess the network felt it needed more republicans in the am. Mika and Joe must not be enough.

  18. 18
    cbear says:

    Yeah, this Michael Jackson coverage is way over the top.
    You’d think we lost Tim Russert or something.

  19. 19
    Rey says:

    MJ’s memorial service was very beautiful and touching. Maybe if the MSM had not gone overboard with all the speculation leading up to the memorial, people would not be so dead set on dismissing a tribute to someone that really gave us beautiful music and from what was said about him at this service was a truly caring humanitarian. He has been put to rest and all of this will go away now. I highly recommend going to YouTube to watch some of the performances from yesterday. Steve Wonder’s song was beautiful and Jon Mayer’s acoustic piece was outstanding. MJ’s kids really did love their father, he seemed to have been a good dad. I was sick of the coverage as well, but when the casket came out- the finality of it all really hit me. I was a fan- so sue me

  20. 20
    linda says:

    i avoided much of the teevee last nite once i heard lawrence odonnell yammering about clinton/obama reactions. what was esp irritating is how he framed it ‘bill clinton and president obama even felt compelled to remark on michael jackson today’ … refusing to note that they were explicitly asked about mj by the jackasses in the white house press corps and those following clinton.

  21. 21
    dr. bloor says:

    @The Moar You Know:

    One more day and then Michael Jackson will rise from his grave and go on a massive killing and brain-eating spree.

    Is Quincy Jones producing the video?

  22. 22
  23. 23
    Brick Oven Bill says:

    Re: California IOUs

    Sir Thomas Gresham got Copernicus’ work named after himself. In general, there is little use for British Royalty. Elton John being knighted is one more example of this.

    Anyway, Copernicus theorized that when bad money is introduced into a system in parallel with good money, the good money will disappear, and only the bad money will be circulated. The banks have already stopped accepting IOUs. So expect to see them on the street in various forms.

    The theory goes that if a currency collapses, so does its associated government. So when the California funny money collapses, what happens to the government of California, as it currently sits in relation to the US framework of states? This is a good question.

    A Federal bailout of California’s new monetary system would give the ‘taxation without representation’ crowd a talking point.


  24. 24
    Violet says:

    The MJ coverage is way over the top, but mentioning it or covering highlights of the memorial service seems okay to me. MJ was a global figure. He died. People gathered all over the world to mourn and celebrate his life. That’s news.

    There’s no defense for the cable networks spending hours, days, weeks on MJ’s death. They like to pretend they’re news networks, but then they continually refuse to do any real journalism and have to be shamed into mentioning important stories (see: Iran). But I guess they do whatever brings ratings. Covering MJ’s death apparently brings eyeballs to TV. So that’s what they’re doing. Modern day equivalent of bread and circuses. Says more about us than them, imho.

  25. 25
    linda says:


    i can’t help but think if those who could turn out for the mj hoohaw could be bothered to turn out to oppose arnie’s draconian budget cuts…. imagine.

  26. 26
    CynDee says:

    @ John Cole:

    In a VERY short time you’ve liberated a fine creature and set her on her rightful path without interfering in the private life nature gave her.

    Trotting and snuffing and rolling, here is Lily Who Loves Doggie Things. “I’m ME. I’m Lily! I’m a dog! Wuff. I can do stuff. The Big Guy is right here and if I decide to turn around and go home, he’ll get the point.”

    Promoting life and enjoyment is your example to a world that greatly needs it.

    Keep a walking, John.

  27. 27
    GregB says:

    John, your pet licking trauma notwithistanding, imagine the thoughts of the constituents that have shaken hands with Larry Craig?

    As to Dylan Ratigan he’s more like that assbag Rick Santelli.


  28. 28
    SGEW says:

    @GregB: Come on now, let’s be fair. There is no evidence that Larry Craig didn’t wash his hands after using the men’s room.

  29. 29
    Tattoosydney says:

    And then I decided it was worth it and just kept a walking.

    Yep. You know it’s love because your dog licks you and you don’t even think about where the tongue has been, just how wonderful it is that the little furry ball of waggy happiness adores you.

  30. 30
    John Cole says:

    @cbear: I added that to the comment of the year contest.

  31. 31
    Johnny B. Guud says:

    he seemed to have been a good dad.

    I don’t know if I can agree with that. Forcing your kids to wear masks, dangling babies from balconies, etc. A bit too…what’s the word? FRACKIN CRAZY, perhaps?

    From everything I’ve seen about the memorial, everyone’s going off about how cute the kids looked, how sad that they were crying, etc. Let’s remember that in a decade when they’re so deranged from god knows what they experienced during their childhood that they end up as meth addicts or worse. Typical Hollywood families. And I’m sure they’ll make a reality show about that, so we can all watch it unfold at the dinner table.

    And that they decided to let the memorial service be aired live, was very tacky and self-promoting, if not creepy. This is not a head of state we’re talking about here, he was an entertainer. For pete’s sake, show some dignity. Let the kids grieve their father in private.


  32. 32
    Redshirt says:

    Dog saliva is magical, and kills all germs, and spreads sunshine and rainbows with every drop. Let the dog lick!

  33. 33
    Cyrus says:

    @Paul L.:

    To the progressives at Crooks and Liars, Michael Jackson settling sexual allegations out of court is proof that he was innocent.

    Breaking news, film at 11, WOOP WOOP WOOP [that’s a plaintext transcription of those Drudge sirens, for those not in the know]: Paul L. dishonestly and transparently mischaracterizes what progressives say!

    a lot people’s recent distaste for Jackson does indeed revolve around the question of his bizarre relationships with children, and we wouldn’t minimize those issues either insofar as there is any factual truth in them (nor, for that matter, have they been ignored in the media coverage).

    Jackson in fact was cleared of all charges relating to his supposed molestation of children. So there is no factual ground for claiming that he was a “pervert” or a “pedophile”.

    So David Neiwert, a progressive, didn’t say that Jackson was innocent at all, just that the accusations against him are insufficiently grounded in facts to draw any conclusions from. (For the record, personally, I believe that Jackson was obviously and indisputably crazy, and the use of a nontechnical term like “crazy” is intentional; but figuring out exactly how he was nuts may never have been possible in the first place and certainly isn’t now.) He certainly didn’t say that settling out of court proved anything one way or another.

    You’re all shocked to see Paul L. behave like this, I know.

  34. 34
    Laura W says:

    @jnfr: Waders! You betcha!

  35. 35
    clone12 says:

    Sarah Palin should totally be a spokesperson for a pastry company:

    “You’ll love something this deliciously flaky.

    Oh, and you should try our pies too.”

  36. 36
    Molly says:

    My MIL had it on last night when I was trying to sleep in the other room. Had to break out the ear plugs.

  37. 37
    CynDee says:

    @ The Moar You Know:

    Time to stop. I can understand the impulse of a creative and thinking person to respond to the MJ mania as you have, but throwing even more ugly imagery in front of us doesn’t really help anything.

    You’re referring to a real person who really lived, and who has many grieving for him this week. Hopefully those closest to him won’t be seeing this particular thread.

    Blasting the media in the way you have is just one more exploitation, however well-intended.

  38. 38
    Comrade Stuck says:

    And then I decided it was worth it and just kept a walking.

    Fuckin’ A!

  39. 39
    cbear says:

    @John Cole:

    I added that to the comment of the year contest.

    Comment of the year???

    I’m deeply honored.
    Will there be prizes?
    Will I be allowed to thank all the little people that made it all possible?
    Will everyone here subscribe to my newsletter?

    I’m practically moonwalking around my computer.

  40. 40
    David Hunt says:

    Sir Thomas Gresham got Copernicus’ work named after himself.

    Stigler’s law of eponymy states that, “No scientific discovery is named after its original discoverer.” And yes, Stigler attributes Stigler’s Law to another fellow named Robert K. Merton.

  41. 41
    JK says:

    @cbear: Very funny.

    No one can argue with his record sales, but it’s simplistic to argue that high record sales always equals high quality as the MSM does.

    Many people could argue that Miles Davis, John Coltrane, Thelonius Monk, Charles Mingus, Charlie Parker, and Dizzy Gillespie were far more creative and talented than Michael Jackson. It’s difficult to be creative, but it’s especially difficult when you’re enduring the stress and strain of racism. Michael Jackson didn’t have to endure racism to anything approaching the levels faced by Davis, Coltrane, et al. Jackson also had a marketing juggernaut behind him that other musicians would kill for.

  42. 42
    Comrade Stuck says:


    Will I be allowed to thank all the little people that made it all possible?

    You must thank the Academy. The little people can eat worms.

  43. 43
    Violet says:

    @Johnny B. Guud:

    Forcing your kids to wear masks

    I always thought that was awful for the kids. But then in the last week since his death they’ve interviewed tons of people who knew him and his kids, and there was a family who had kids around the same age as MJ’s kids and they used to spend time together. He (the dad) said because Michael always had his kids’ faces covered when they were out togther, none of the paparazzi and media knew what the kids looked like. So when MJ and family came to visit, this guy’s kids and MJ’s kids could go out together and no one would know who they were. No one at all. So it meant that the kids could be normal kids, go out in public, do normal things, etc., so long as they weren’t around their dad. There were even pictures of the kids in the minivan with this other family’s kids, going to some amusement park of something – faces totally uncovered.

    It certainly made me re-think the whole face mask thing. I’m still not sure I agree with him doing that to his kids, but it does seem like there might have been a rationale behind it that, rather than just weird freakiness.

  44. 44
    Ondine Breck says:

    @Max: Why can’t they send Mika, Joe, Ratigan over to Faux where they belong? These people are so tiresome; I can’t turn on MSNBC til afternoon.

  45. 45
    The Moar You Know says:

    @CynDee: Your butthurt concern is duly noted. I am laughing my ass off at your sputtering indignation very very sorry for my cruel and hurtful words and promise to do it again within the next hour to take the feelings and sensitivities of crybabies folks like yourself into account next time I post.

    Up Yours Sincerely,

    The Moar You Know

  46. 46
    jnfr says:

    @Laura W:

    The waders were awesome.

  47. 47
    tim says:

    Why does it surprise anyone, or seem inappropriate, that the public funeral/memorial service of one of the most popular entertainers of all time, world-wide, would be shown live on television, or that commentators would commentate endlessly about it and his passing?

    And why, if you don’t care for it, wouldn’t you just turn off the tv or radio, and click on past related stories on the net?

    Aren’t these anti-Jacko coverage comments meant simply to make the commenters feel superior in their very serious interest in only the very most serious news, like, you know, Lily’s crotch licking habits?

    just asking

  48. 48
    Johnny B. Guud says:

    @Violet: Fair point. But please, holding a baby out over the balcony? C’mon. That’s insanity. Pure insanity.

  49. 49
    JenJen says:

    We are now three days into the Mika Brzezinski “Real American” crisis!

    Today while watching, I learned, for the third day in a row, that I am indeed a fake American. She showed polls and stuff. She called herself a “Polish Hillbilly” at one point.

    I completely agree with what Laura W said in another thread… I almost wept with relief, too, when KO and Rachel returned to my teevee last night. I’m not crazy! I’m not crazy!!

    Also, as Laura W said, Waders is the new Flight Suit.

  50. 50
    Persia says:

    @John Cole: Good, it belongs there.

    @Violet: That’s incredibly savvy, if that’s the case. I think he was smarter in many respects than people ever gave him credit for.

    @tim: Because for all people complain about ‘elitists,’ they’re incredibly snobby when it comes to pop entertainment. And Michael Jackson was weird. And black.

  51. 51
    Johnny B. Guud says:

    Many people could argue that Miles Davis, John Coltrane, Thelonius Monk, Charles Mingus, Charlie Parker, and Dizzy Gillespie were far more creative and talented than Michael Jackson.


    And back to pop music, what about Stevie Wonder, who did so much for pop music and was a musical prodigy. Here you had a blind African-American teenager, in the early 60s, singing his way to Billboard’s number one spot while the Jackson 5 were still in diapers. And I’ll put Innervisions up against any of Jacko’s albums any day.

  52. 52
    Laura W says:


    She called herself a “Polish Hillbilly” at one point.

    Starbuck’s Eva Gabor!
    No, wait. She was Hungarian, right?
    (Obtuse Green Acres alert.)

  53. 53
    lawnorder says:

    Congratulations, you are now officially a dog owner :p

  54. 54
    gnomedad says:

    Kathleen Parker is once again going Cole.

  55. 55
    Screamin' Demon says:

    I caught highlights of the memorial service on the teevee. When his daughter Paris said MJ was the best dad in the world, I turned to Mrs. Demon and said, “She must not have been the one he dangled over the balcony.”

  56. 56
    JK says:

    @Johnny B. Guud:

    Totally agree with your comments regarding Stevie Wonder. I don’t think Michael Jackson’s discography stands up to Stevie Wonder’s discography in any way, shape, or form. For the MSM, it’s all about sales figures. Jackson sold more records than anyone else, therefore the quality of his music must be head and shoulders above anyone else.

  57. 57
    JK says:

    We are now three days into the Mika Brzezinski “Real American” crisis!

    Zbigniew Brezinski needs to redraft his will ASAP. Mika is nothing but a clueless, useless tool.

  58. 58
    Dog Is My Copilot says:

    I was an MJ fan for years, too – I grew up on the music of the Jackson Five. I agree that the coverage of his death has been over the top. He was a talented individual who apparently led a tormented life, and it’s too bad he couldn’t find peace within himself. I want to believe he wasn’t guilty of the child molestation charges, but we’ll probably never know for sure. What I feel most sad for are his children – to see his daughter say a few touching words was the thing that choked me up the most. It brought a touch of humanity to the whole overdone affair. Those three children lost the only parent they knew, and I’m afraid they’ll have a rough time of it with the custody battles that ultimately lie ahead.

  59. 59
    DonnaInMichigan says:

    Are you freaking joking….they haven’t EVEN put Michael Jackson in a plot yet?? WTF? Are they going to keep driving him all over L.A.?? Drive him to Neverland and around the town?

    The man died 12 days ago. And yet, he STILL hasn’t been put in his final resting place.

    What is this family thinking? Is there going to be yet another star-studded memorial in a few weeks, where they can roll the casket out to the masses??

    Jeebesus… a plot in a cemetary and plop his body down in there. Or cremate him and spread his ashes around Never-land..or wherever he would be most at peace.

    But for christsakes…give the man some damn peace.

  60. 60
    LD50 says:

    Frankly, I never gave a fuck about MJ or his music. I was a LOT more sad when Ron Asheton died early this year.

  61. 61
    Paul L. says:


    So David Neiwert, a progressive, didn’t say that Jackson was innocent at all,

    In his new post, Neiwert sure does imply it.

    What O’Reilly conveniently omits here, of course, is that King didn’t merely call him a pedophile (which, considering that Jackson was acquitted, is in fact a slanderous thing to say),

    What Neiwert conveniently omits here is Jackson’s settlement.
    Quote NYT – BOB HERBERT:

    One case of alleged pedophilia against Jackson, the details of which would make your hair stand on end, was settled for a reported $25 million. He beat another case in court.

    In O’Reilly’s case, the folks at Crooks and Liars view his settlement as proof of guilt.
    BTW, Bill O’Reilly was never charged with Sexual Harassment in a court of law.

  62. 62
    Redshirt says:

    I saw this brought up the other day here, but without enough detail; can someone explain to me the appeal of Atrios, and Eschaton? I don’t get it. He seems smart/witty enough, but there’s barely any content on his blog. Here is my impression of three posts by Atrios:

    1. Another bank EATED (link to news story)

    2. Jobless day is the new black (link to news story)

    3. Out Drinking Liberally

    And repeat.

    So, what am I missing? I try to faithfully read his blog, but, a minute later, when done, I always wonder why.

  63. 63
    Johnny B. Guud says:

    @DonnaInMichigan: Whatever keeps the image and the cash register alive.

    I agree with your comments. Enough already. Farrah died the same day and the funeral was over a week ago.

    Call me cynical or whatever, but I believe Jacko’s brothers and LaToya benefitted greatly from Michael’s….(ahem)…generosity. Nothing like passing the casket around a few days more so the Itunes checks keep coming in.

  64. 64
  65. 65
    JK says:


    @Johnny B. Guud:

    Nothing like passing the casket around a few days more so the Itunes checks keep coming. in.

    Sad, but true.

    If TV execs could get away with it, the funeral service at the Staples Center would be just one stop on a multi-city funeral services tour with other venues such as Notre Dame Cathedral, Westminister Abbey, the Colosseum, and the Parthenon.

  66. 66
    Hedley Lamarr says:

    I thought a dog’s tongue was used to drink, taste, perspire, and rid itself of harmful bacteria.

  67. 67
    shortstop says:

    “She’s going to lick me with that tongue.”

    Remember the old MasterCard commercial, “Life with a dog…priceless”? We find ourselves frequently remarking to each other, “Life with a dog…revolting.”

    But we’re just faking high standards.

  68. 68
    shortstop says:

    (Obtuse Green Acres alert.)

    For super bonus points, name the third Gabor sister.

  69. 69
    chopper says:


    you’ve never met my dog.

  70. 70
    Jamie says:

    Now,that is the way to spend an afternoon. I did the same things as Lily did,with my girlfriend (soon my wife). I didn’t lick myself,though….

  71. 71
    D-Chance. says:

    Ah, Philadelphia

  72. 72
  73. 73
    passerby says:

    [In scrolly font]

    Deep Thoughts

    —-by Jack Handy

    On our walk a couple hours ago,
    I watched Lily lick herself,
    sniff dog doo,
    nose around in some dead stuff,
    and as she was sticking her nose into the crotch of another dog, it dawned on me:

    “She’s going to lick me with that tongue.”

    And then I decided it was worth it
    and just kept a walking.

  74. 74
    LD50 says:



  75. 75
    Keith G says:

    @Paul L.: Speaking of zombies: Hi Paul.

  76. 76
    Steeplejack says:



    Didn’t refer to Google or Wikipedia. Just old.

  77. 77
    shortstop says:

    Good work, Jack!

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