Pens vs. Red Wings Open Thread

Let’s go Pens!

OT: Tell me the recipe for lavender-lemon cookies in this GOS diary doesn’t sound amazing.

*** Update ***

1-1. This is stressful, and the Pens are doing some piss poor passing and puck control.

*** Update #2 ***

Wings win, and they are just a really damned good team and this will be a tough series. I guess I can take solace in the fact the Pens played tough.

148 replies
  1. 1
    Spiffy McBang says:

    Let’s go Sabres!


    Truth be told, though, living in Cali for the last four years, any glimmer of hockey fandom makes me happy. So, in thy honor, go Pens.

  2. 2
    Linkmeister says:

    What is this game played on ice doing on national TV? I don’t recall seeing it before, except during Olympics years.

    O/T, John, I just picked up a copy of Natalie Merchant’s “Tiger Lily” CD from the library, and two tracks in I’m very impressed. Thanks for the recommendation.

  3. 3

    Wings win tonight. Pens will be distracted by octopus. Wings in six.

  4. 4
    JasonF says:

    I grew up in DC a Caps fan and then moved to Chicago where I became a Blackhawks fan, so this year’s playoffs have brought me nothing but disappointment.

    That said, I’m a big fan of penguns (the burds), so I might as well root for the Penguins (the hockey team)

  5. 5
    Fred says:

    I’m sure pittsburgh can do it in 8.

  6. 6
    TheBus says:

    GO WINGS!!!!

  7. 7
    geg6 says:

    Okay. I will try to remain calm. Really, I will. But can I just say how much NBC sucks for not letting them show these games on Mario’s Screen. Fuck NBC.

  8. 8
    Americanitis says:

    Guilty Flyers fan here, but little bro is in Pitt, so go Pens! This series, Malkin will show why he’s the true superstar on the team. Crosby’s great, but Evgeni is incredible.

    Detroit who? Pens in 7.

  9. 9

    Go Pens!! Please PLEASE don’t break my heart again.

    The Winged Wheel is a very scary team. It’s the beards…

  10. 10
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:

    Fucking Terry McAuliffe is gonna win the Democratic primary here in VA and then lose to Republican McDonnell. You heard it here first. How could this happen? We had the hugely popular and wildly successful Democrat Mark Warner followed by the very popular and competent Democrat Tim Kaine.

    Then we get a drunken corporate toady Clinton campaign castoff? WTF?

    Virginia really needs to lose the one term gubernatorial limit. Fuckers.

  11. 11
    geg6 says:

    Death By Mosquito Truck: Quitcher whining. You could be stuck with Arlen Specter as your senator. You have no idea what we PA Dems live with here.

  12. 12
    Comrade Darkness says:


  13. 13
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:

    Red Wings got their own anthem singer on the payroll? That’s big time there.

  14. 14
    Andy K says:

    Wings in 7.

    Pens are better this year than last, but they’re still not strong enough to overcome the depth and experience of the Wings.

  15. 15
    Andy K says:

    @Death By Mosquito Truck:

    When she isn’t touring. She’s one of Seger’s regular backing vocalists.

  16. 16
    Persia says:

    Has anyone seen this yet? The Republicans’ new talking points apparently say that Obama shouldn’t go on vacation with his family.

    I’m running out of snitty remarks.

  17. 17
    John Cole says:

    This is going to be another white knuckle series for me, I can tell.

  18. 18
    Laura W says:

    I love lemon bars. Why don’t you whip up some of those yummies for intermission. (Half time?)
    Only on BJ can you find the rough yang of ice hockey balanced out by the soft yin of lavender-lemon bars in a two-sentence post.
    (I’m finally watching Running With Scissors, although I would’ve said the same thing even if not.)

  19. 19
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:

    One of the announcers sounds like Terry McAuliffe. I may have to change the audio to music.

  20. 20
    John Cole says:

    Did they grease the puck before tonight’s game?

  21. 21
    geg6 says:

    John Cole: Hockey almost always makes me totally stress out. It’s just too action packed, I think. For instance, in football there’s always a slight pause between downs to calm down. In basketball, there’s foul shots to slow things down. And baseball is nothing if not slow with a few excitings moments sprinkled throughout. Hockey is fast and just relentless action. My heart pounds throughout. That’s why alcohol is absolutely required.

  22. 22

    I’m liking this Penguin team tonight.

    They don’t appear to taking any shit from the Wings this time….

  23. 23
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:

    Geez, how did that get in?

  24. 24
    geg6 says:

    Well, that sucked.

  25. 25
    Graeme says:

    Detroit came to play. Pens don’t stand a chance, kids!


  26. 26
    cgp says:

    @John Cole:

    This would be the Red Wings you’re playing now. Welcome to the next level.

  27. 27
  28. 28
    John Cole says:

    @cgp: Nah, it seemed like both teams were doing some really shitty passing. Red Wings seemed to step up their puck control at the mid-way point of the period. The Pens are still passing pretty sloppily.

  29. 29


    Wings give it away…Pens in transition…score.

    Nice juicy rebound from Osgood.

  30. 30
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:

    As soon as someone starts talking smack..


  31. 31
    Ked says:


    Oh, and John, I don’t want to carp but I think it was more than a week ago you promised that Pamela’s boobs would be gone in a week. I know you’ve gotta make money (hell, I was writing to Sully encouraging him to take ads at the Atlantic for a year before they finally caved in), but it really sucks not being able to hit BJ from work.

  32. 32
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:

    @Persia: Notice how they flashbacked to Clinton getting some trim a haircut on the runway like the last eight disastrous years never happened?

  33. 33
    Kathy says:

    I can’t believe my own son is saying he’s going to root for the Peng’s because they are in the same state as us (Philly). His whole family is Detroit born and bred, how could he. I told him to tuck his own butt in bed after that goal.
    This is going to be a long night. (Laura W sweetie, it’s intermission-3 periods, and I would love your lemon bar receipe.)
    Kathy plus 1 1/2, (1 martini, 1/2 bottle of excellent Malbec.)

  34. 34
    TheBus says:

    Bad goals by both teams. All even.

  35. 35
    John Cole says:

    @Ked: Can you get an adblocker or use google reader?

  36. 36
    JC says:

    Tell me the recipe for lavender-lemon cookies in this GOS diary doesn’t sound amazing.

    Now tell me you aren’t a closeted homosexual.

    Go on, I dare you.

  37. 37
    John Cole says:

    @JC: Sadly, just a pudgy straight guy who really likes lemon bars. My dad makes this lemon cake that could kill mere mortals it is so good.

  38. 38
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:

    @JC: C’mon, cut the man some slack. Either way he goes, he loses half his readership.

  39. 39
    Andy K says:

    Man, Wings dominated that first period! Sucks that it’s tied.

  40. 40
    cgp says:

    Actually, I see what you’re talking about the greased puck now. My goodness. One of the big things about HD TV is it makes hockey much easier to watch.

  41. 41

    Bad goals by both teams. All even.

    On the scoreboard, maybe, but I gotta give the first period to the Wings. Lots of scoring ops, good hitting, won most of the corner battles.

    Note to Pens: You keep giving the puck away like you just did Detroit is going to skate it right up your ass. If you’re dumpin and chasin get some speed into the zone for heavens sake because the Wings are beating you to the puck every time. Keep hammering them.

  42. 42
    Andy K says:


  43. 43
    Left Coast Tom says:

    I grew up in Michigan and have spent most of my adult life in the SF Bay Area. So if it can’t be the Sharks it has to be the Red Wings.

    Besides, any city that has to put up with William Clay Ford and his “Lions” deserves a break.

  44. 44
    John Cole says:

    @cgp: It’s horrible. The puck is skittering and bouncing all over the place. I’m not sure I’ve seen anything like it.

    And then you add in the mental mistakes and the Pens have more giveaways than they did in the last two series.

    And Osgood is sick.

  45. 45

    Literal Videos:

    It’s like MST3K for bad 80s rock videos.

    Total Eclipse of the Heart

    Separate Ways

    I can’t believe the amount of time I spent watching crap like this back in the 1980s. I mean after watching that Bonnie Tyler video all I can think is “WTF?”

    Oh, and as much as I love A-Ha and Take Me On this parody is priceless

    “This guy’s gonna get an ass full of pipe wrench!”

  46. 46
    John Cole says:

    @Left Coast Tom: Truth be told, I can’t muster up any hate for the Red Wings.

    First, they are just good. Second, the Yzerman era was just such good hockey.

    If I had to pick teams that I just loathe, I would go with the Flyers and the New Jersey Devils. The Flyers because their fans are just goons, and the Devils because the neutral zone trap just killed hockey for me for a number of years.

  47. 47
    Andy K says:

    @Left Coast Tom:

    Hate to say it, but it will never be the Sharks. I have never, ever seen a professional sports franchise that has choked as frequently as that one.

  48. 48
    Captain Goto says:

    As long as teh Pens keep playing with this kind of grit…I ain’t worried.

    penalty ! ! !

  49. 49
    Captain Goto says:

    Of course, some decent work on the PP wouldn’t hurt.

    Crash the net, guys ! ! !

  50. 50
    John Cole says:

    See what I mean? None of the Pens can control the puck at all.

  51. 51
    Ked says:

    …those have to be two of the limpest power plays I’ve ever seen. How are the Pens in the finals, again?

  52. 52
    Andy K says:

    @John Cole:

    the Yzerman era was just such good hockey

    With the exception of two years in the late ’80’s, when the Wings snuck in to the conference championship, they weren’t all that great. Yzerman: GREAT! The team: not so much. Remember, Stevie’s career began in ’83-’84. The Wings weren’t solid until ’91 or ’92.

    It wasn’t until Fedorov showed up that the team turned the corner.

  53. 53
    Captain Goto says:

    How are the Pens in the finals, again?

    If you had seen the last series, you wouldn’t ask that.

  54. 54
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:

    @John Cole: Relax, Pens are holding their own against a better team.

  55. 55
    John Cole says:

    Is it just me or are the Red Wings collectively the best backchecking team in the NHL? This is impressive.

  56. 56
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:

    @John Cole: I read backchecking as barebacking. I need to cut back on my gay pr0n.

  57. 57
    John Cole says:

    @Andy K: Maybe I’m blurring the Stevie Y era with the Russian era.

  58. 58
    Captain Goto says:

    Spinarama ! ! !

  59. 59
    Andy K says:

    Ozzie is playing as if he’s got something to prove. You’d figure he’d get more respect, seeing as he’s been in goal for two Cup wins.

  60. 60
    Ked says:

    If you had seen the last series, you wouldn’t ask that.

    Okay, I admit I was mostly watching Wings/Hawks. (I’m near South Bend, which makes both of them regional favorites.) And I barely watch any hockey outside of the playoffs. Only saw a few periods of the other series and yes, the Canes were even more awful. But, well, daaaaamn.

  61. 61
    Captain Goto says:

    Nice PK so far….

  62. 62
    John Cole says:

    If you had seen the last series, you wouldn’t ask that.

    But if you had watched the Caps/Pens series you would understand why they are in… That was great hockey.

  63. 63
    Andy K says:

    @John Cole:

    Probably. The NHL, other than Gretzky’s Oilers, wasn’t that popular in the ’80’s. I’ll bet you didn’t know much about the Pens until Mario came to town, and that you didn’t start following them regularly until their first Cup championship…Or am I wrong?

  64. 64
    Left Coast Tom says:

    @Andy K:
    I agree about the Sharks and choking.

  65. 65
    John Cole says:

    @Andy K: I didn’t really follow any sports closely in the 80’s. I was a teenager and was too busy swimming, playing soccer, playing lacrosse, and touring with the Dead. I will note that my lacrosse jersey # was 66 BEFORE Super Mario.

  66. 66
    Andy K says:

    I need an otherwise neutral party to stick up for the Wings for a while. Gotta get my kid to work. Anyone game?

  67. 67
    Ked says:

    (Completely off-topic) WOOOT!

    Unemployment went down in April locally! An actual increase in jobs!

    Though when all the car parts suppliers go completely under we may still be in trouble.

  68. 68
    John Cole says:

    @Andy K: I think there are actually a couple Red Wings fans here already.

  69. 69
    Nicole says:

    (Laura W sweetie, it’s intermission-3 periods

    Don’t feel bad, Laura W; back in my children’s theater touring days, during a weeklong gig in Pittsburgh I met a very nice young man who played in a hockey league. He invited me to come watch one of their games, which I did. I was unaware that hockey came in three periods, and wandered off during the third period to play video games, figuring I would come back during the fourth quarter and catch the end. Imagine my surprise when I wandered back later to find everyone was gone.

    To make matters worse, during the third period he scored something apparently called a “hat trick” and looked up to to see if I saw it, and I was not there. Because I was off playing video games.

  70. 70
    Captain Goto says:

    My boss, who works next door to me, has an office absolutely dripping with the following:

    *Steeler memorabilia
    *NASCAR memorabilia
    *Star Trek memorabilia
    *Star Wars memorabilia
    *New Jersey Devils memorabilia (his brother works for them, at least)

    …and I thought *I* was an overgrown kid.

  71. 71
    techno says:

    Story of the game is the incredible play by both defenses. The Wings are stymied and Malkin and Crosby have barely touched the puck. Both teams are putting on a clinic.

  72. 72
    Captain Goto says:

    Fuck WordPress.

  73. 73
    Litlebritdifrnt says:

    Not OT (cause this is an open thread) but my pal Mimi over at Poltijab just posted this from Rush Limbaugh, 2005

    “I’m tired of these Democrats acting like they won the election. Somebody needs to stand up and say, “When you win the election, you pick the nominees. Until then, shut up! Just shut up! Just go away! Bury yourselves in your rat holes and don’t come out until you win an election. When you win an election, you can put all these socialist wackos, like Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Stephen Breyer, all over the court, but until then, SHUT UP! You are really irritating me.”

    Can we say biggest damn idiot in the universe? Here’s a clue Rush, stuff on the internet stays on the internet. You have been pwnd.

  74. 74
    Captain Goto says:


  75. 75
    Andy K says:


  76. 76
    Ked says:

    Niiiiiiiice carom.

    Are all the Finals games on NBC? Or do they switch back to Versus on the weeknights? They’ve probably said, but I’ve had it on mute for most of the game.

  77. 77
    Captain Goto says:

    Well, once Detroit can get a goal by shooting at the *front* of the goalie, I’ll be impressed.

  78. 78
    Krista says:

    Tell me the recipe for lavender-lemon cookies in this GOS diary doesn’t sound amazing.

    They do sound lovely, but unfortunately the hubby is quite allergic to lavender. I know that if he smells it, he gets all congested, eyes watering, headache, the whole bit. So I don’t dare have him ingest it.

    Made hoisin-glazed ribs tonight, and they were fracking awesome, if I say so myself. There’s something satisfying about cooking ribs for guys — they get almost giddily happy about it.

  79. 79
    John Cole says:

    @techno: Yes. I say again, the backchecking of the wings is pretty unbelievable.

  80. 80
    Laura W says:


    Don’t feel bad, Laura W

    Ho Boy. There is a long list of stuff I feel bad about in life. Not exposing myself to hockey wouldn’t even make the bottom of the list. I was more fascinated by the mention of lemon bars.

    I’m not fond of any sport wherein you can’t see the mens’ body parts.

  81. 81
    Captain Goto says:

    I keed, I keed. Garbage goals are what win Cups.

  82. 82
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:

    @Ked: Yeah, contrast that with finding out on Thursday they’re closing our office on July 31st. I suspect there’s a bit more pain to come.

  83. 83
    John Cole says:

    @Death By Mosquito Truck: Is your job safe?

    And this recession is not over by any stretch. Shit is still getting much worse every month.

  84. 84
    Captain Goto says:

    Dinner here, for 2:

    -Baked sweet potato
    -Fresh asparagus, out of my buddy’s garden, roasted with olive oil and kosher salt
    -Burgers from ground chuck, mine with mayo/horseradish dressing and white cheddar, lettuce and tomato

    and for dessert, for my fiancee’s birthday…
    -Almond torte.

    If the Pens would win, the night would be perfect…but not bad so far.

  85. 85
    techno says:

    @ Goto 76.

    It looks like that sort of game. What I saw at the end of the period was the Pens growing weary of chasing the Wings in their own end. When puck possession works, it really pays off at the end of periods and games.

  86. 86
    Litlebritdifrnt says:

    @Laura W:

    Like Rugby…. which is the most beautiful sport in the universe, hearty and hale men, (real men) charging around on a field with their shorts being torn off on a regular basis. Sheer bliss.

  87. 87
    TX Expat says:

    Sorry to interrupt a sports events thread, but I’ve just been able to access the internet and find that John posted a thread about Outlaw Country.

    John, Waylon is by far my favorite cw artist. Little known fact, he’s from a small town not far from where I’m from in TX. My dad used to go see him when he played with Buddy Holly, who’s from Lubbock, back in the ’60’s.

    And that Willie song you posted is also my favorite Willie song. I used to tell people that would be the song that I played at my wedding for the groom/bride first dance. Now it’s a toss-up between that and this:

    Ok, so I’m not a big fan of “psychedelic imagery” when it comes to George and Tammy, but it’s the best I could find.

    Funny story, back in the ’90’s, my boyfriend at the time was in a band that was working a lot with Willie so I got to go to a concert at a military base (weird!) and then go out to his bus where we smoked copious amounts of weed. He’s so down to earth and funny. Same BF was supposed to play with Waylon (where I would have gotten to meet my hero), but his advance crew were such jerks that my BF’s band said, “to hell with it”. Then he (Waylon) died about 6 months later.

    Sorry to interrupt the game, but had to throw you a line and say a big THANK YOU for acknowledging outlaw country as the badass thing that it is.

    One last thing, the best thing about living where I live is that they have a classic country station that plays nothing past the early 80’s. Love, love, love!

  88. 88
    Darkrose says:

    @Wile E. Quixote: The worst thing about the Bonnie Tyler video, aside from having to admit that I still kind of like the song, is that I kind of looked like a shorter, darker version of her in 1984. I totally had the big hair and the heavy eyeliner–which looked really silly on someone with glasses.

  89. 89
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:

    @John Cole:

    Is your job safe?

    Yeah, I’ll have to suck it and work from home. :)

    And this recession is not over by any stretch. Shit is still getting much worse every month.

    I think there are currently more indicators than not showing an upswing is in short order.

  90. 90
    Irony Abounds says:

    I’m not fond of any sport wherein you can’t see the mens’ body parts.

    I must be missing something. What sport allows you to see the mens’ body parts? I assume you are referring to the interesting body parts.

  91. 91
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:

    Suck it up, even. Christ. (It’s the hand.)

  92. 92
    Darkrose says:

    The lemon-lavender bars look good, but the one I’m definitely saving is the bacon lemon tarragon chicken. That looks fantastic.

  93. 93
    Kathy says:

    Woohoo! 2-1, and yes I love the Wings, but, if it was the Pengs and anyone else(besides the Flyers-my local team), I’d probably go with the Pengs. Being from Detroit, there is just something about Pittsburgh I can relate to and sympathize with.
    Laura W, not everyone has to like hockey, but yes everyone should like lemon bars :)

  94. 94
    John Cole says:

    @Death By Mosquito Truck: I got your editing back, you one-armed git.

  95. 95
    TX Expat says:

    @TX Expat:

    Ok, I’m gonna try to post the YouTube video again:

  96. 96
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:

    @John Cole: God, yer gonna melt my cold heart and make me tolerable if you keep this up. Can ya add the “up” to suck it. It sounds too sexual the way it is.

  97. 97
    John Cole says:

    @TX Expat: Added it for you.

  98. 98
    Krista says:

    I must be missing something. What sport allows you to see the mens’ body parts? I assume you are referring to the interesting body parts.

    Irony, you’re assuming that the naughty bits are the only male body parts that are enjoyable to look at. There is something to be said for the sinewed forearm, the broad back, or the muscular curve at the back of the thigh, leading to what you know is a phenomenal butt. Any sport involving very fit men in shorts is always lovely to watch.

    I do love my hockey, but Laura has a point — they are way too covered up, sadly.

  99. 99
    Captain Goto says:

    In re recession, the same buddy with the awesome asparagus in his garden, lost *both* of the jobs he had. He is now doing a turn as a night manager at a long-term care home. Feeding Alzheimer’s patients, only getting $10/hr, but he does actually ‘manage’ a couple of other people, so that’ll look good on the resume.

    I feel pretty good about my job, but it’s a tiny company, and you never know when the BOD will say to the bosses that they gotta start cutting staff…

  100. 100
    TX Expat says:

    @John Cole:

    Thank you!

  101. 101
    John Cole says:

    @TX Expat: That is a great song, btw. I doubt I will ever get married, so I will never use either. Too much of the Groucho Marx “I don’t want to be a member of any club that will have me as a member” mentality at play.

  102. 102
    Laura W says:

    I assume you are referring to the interesting body parts.

    Interesting is in the eye of the beholder. I like arms and chests. There are many sports that allow me to indulge my fetish by leaving these interesting parts exposed or covered with a moderate amount of fabric, thus allowing me to appreciate the fine artistry.

  103. 103
    John Cole says:

    @Krista: You know what is funny about hockey players? Most people don’t realize how big they are. Sure, the skates make them look taller, but the average weight of a hockey team is actually comparable or bigger than the average weight of a football team. Just the linemen and the uniforms in hockey mask how big they are.

  104. 104
    Captain Goto says:

    you *might* be right, but there are *no* 350-lb hockey players…

  105. 105
    Captain Goto says:

    Aw, crap.

  106. 106
    Death By Mosquito Truck says:


  107. 107
  108. 108
    Captain Goto says:

    Christ, what a lucky break.

  109. 109
    John Cole says:

    @Captain Goto: Yes, but they are still really big. I used to go to a bar in Mt. Lebanon that all the Pens went to after games and I could never get over how big they are, and at the time I was 6’0″ 210 lbs and in shape, and they all dwarfed me.

  110. 110
    Captain Goto says:

    I have *never* seen anything like that.

  111. 111
    GTI says:

    3-1! Let’s go Red Wings!!

  112. 112
    TX Expat says:

    @John Cole:

    Yeah, I hear you.. My problem is that I’ve never found anyone that is willing to get on a bus driven by Neal Cassady – in the sense that I will abruptly change course and charge off in a totally different direction from place to place (all over the country and around the world) or even in intellectual pursuits at a whim. C’est la vie.

    But, again, sorry to interrupt a hockey game thread. Although I’m not a sports fan per se, I do enjoy sporting events if I go to them. I loved going to hockey games when I lived in Seattle.


  113. 113
    Captain Goto says:

    Which bar was that? My fiancee lives in Mt. Lebo, and I’m spending a lot more time there lately…

    …interestingly enough, my favorite watering hole is the hangout for the club rugby teams in Pittsburgh. Long story.

  114. 114
    Krista says:

    You know what is funny about hockey players? Most people don’t realize how big they are.

    There is something about hockey gear that makes guys look kind of stumpy, unfortunately. Hockey is definitely my favourite sport to watch live, but I can’t scare up any aesthetic appreciation for hockey players. I grew up around them, and too often had to endure the stench of 2 or 3 end-of-season hockey bags full of un-aired gear, while driving back from away games. So unfortunately, when I think of hockey players, I think of stinky, stinky gear.

  115. 115
    Andy K says:

    @John Cole:

    You know what is funny about hockey players? Most people don’t realize how big they are.

    That’s another fairly recent development. Up until the ’90’s, a 6’5″, 230 lb. guy was sort of rare, but there were plenty of guys who went 5’10”, 175 lbs.. The first time I saw a hockey player in person and freaked about his size was in the early ’90’s, when I walked by Keith Primeau in a Bloomington hotel. The guy was huge. But a few nights earlier, my buddy and I met Wendell Clark, a very good, very tough guy, and I didn’t even recognize him as a player.

  116. 116
    laxel says:

    This is probably not of much interest to anyone, but I did a drywall remodel job once for a lesser known right-winger (position, not philosophy) on the Red Wings. Got to meet him, he was modest and personable, as was his home. So, if anyone’s still on the fence, go with the Wings. Great hockey, good for the economy, modest and personable.

  117. 117
    laxel says:

    “My problem is that I’ve never found anyone that is willing to get on a bus driven by Neal Cassady “

    Sign me up.

  118. 118
    Andy K says:


    Name names, please!

  119. 119
    TX Expat says:


    you just made me laugh, consider yourself on the bus…just brace yourself for long periods of boredom punctuated by moments of sheer terror and lots of uproarious laughter.

  120. 120
    laxel says:

    Name names!

    No can do, as a strictly professional courtes…. laughing while typing that. The guy seemed real nice, so won’t post his name, but I’ll say that his first name is the same as any front page poster here who isn’t John or Tim. And he played during the 90’s. Them’s some clues.

    I also did the landscape lighting at Dumar’s house over a decade ago.

    Am I entitled now to say Go Lions!1101!

    I thought so.

  121. 121
    Captain Goto says:

    Aw, well.

    Tomorrow, *if* I see the second game, it will between runs to the bathroom, and slugs of that vile crap they give you to drink before a colonoscopy…

    Middle age is *so* much fun.

  122. 122
    John Cole says:

    @laxel: Gonna go with Doug Brown, who was also with the Pens.

  123. 123
    burnspbesq says:

    God, the locals in SoCal are insufferable right about now, with the Lakers back in the NBA finals and the Dodgers on track to win 110 games.

    I’m in lax withdrawal. But my high school won its second consecutive state championship yesterday. Go Maroons!

  124. 124
    Andy K says:


    New England guy? Married into the NY Giants family? If so, that guy won me a lot of $1 bills in First Goal and OT goal pools. He wasn’t a superstar, but he was a helluva hockey player. Played great defense, scored timely goals.

  125. 125
    Andy K says:

    @John Cole:

    Compromise the guy, why don’tchya?

  126. 126
    burnspbesq says:


    That would pretty much have to be Doug Weight, methinks.

  127. 127
    Andy K says:


    Never played for the Wings. And he’s a center.

  128. 128
    Captain Goto says:

    Anecdotally, I have heard that hockey players are more down-to-earth than any other pro athletes. Never met one myself, so I don’t know if it’s true.

  129. 129
    laxel says:

    John, while I can neither confirm nor deny your baseless speculation about any fact in or out of question for the matter preceding us, I will say that it will indeed be a very cold day in hell before I reveal any information about clients who are of a modest and personable nature. Further, it is only a fanciful flight of the author’s imagination, that can in NO way be attributed to the guy who once patched up the ceiling in Doug Brown’s kitchen and, if memory serves, did the board in an ‘alleged’ one room addition. Suck on that lawyers/

  130. 130
    John Cole says:

    @Captain Goto: I would concur, if my experiences at the Saloon in Mt. Lebo are any guide. I also had the rich experience of having Greg Lloyd threaten to kick my ass, so that may be shaping my opinions.

  131. 131
    John Cole says:

    In defense of Greg Lloyd, that may be how he says hello.

  132. 132
    John Cole says:

    This is OT for WoW dorks, but I keep seeing links back to the Elitist Jerks forums, of which I am a member, to this website, and it makes me laugh. I wish I had access to the private forums to follow the links back.


  133. 133
    Andy K says:

    John, have the Stillers done anything to upgrade their offensive line this year?

  134. 134
    Captain Goto says:

    John @ 130 FTW.

  135. 135
    John Cole says:

    @Andy K: Not paid any attention at all. I’ll deal with that in August.

    I have too many things I am interested in. I swear to FSM what will kill me is sensory overload.

  136. 136
    laxel says:

    Since this is open thread, I have to say I kind of admire, as a fellow masher, the work that the autotune the news crew is doing.

    No affiliation, but I’ll recommend, number 2.

    and the one they just made, #4. I don’t know why, but thumbs up.

  137. 137
    Andy K says:

    @John Cole:

    Me neither. Following the end of the European football season, baseball and, of course, the Stanley Cup playoffs. I don’t even know what the Packers have done since the draft- my dad’s disappointed with me over that.

  138. 138
    Graeme says:

    Ozzy played a solid game. Our kids are earning extra ice time, which is great given game 2 tomorrow. This is looking good, and it will look even better when Datsyuk comes back.


  139. 139
    Anne Laurie says:

    There is something to be said for the sinewed forearm, the broad back, or the muscular curve at the back of the thigh, leading to what you know is a phenomenal butt.

    All execellent examples of the Goddess’ artistry. I myself have a great weakness for a well-sculpted male collarbone, though. Something about the curves blending into the hollow of the throat.

  140. 140
    burnspbesq says:

    @Anne Laurie:

    Fyi, the model for the male sculpture outside the LA Coliseum was a water polo player.

    And Mia Hamm is the sexiest woman who ever lived.

  141. 141
    Joel says:

    Looking at the other winter professional sport, I can only hope that a plague descends on the Finals and the NBA has to void the championship for this season.

  142. 142
    Krista says:

    I myself have a great weakness for a well-sculpted male collarbone, though. Something about the curves blending into the hollow of the throat.

    Indeed. It is the contrasts that make men so beautiful. Those little spots of boyish vulnerability (the temple, the soft skin behind the ear, the long eyelashes closed in repose) are what make the heart ache.

  143. 143
    techno says:

    This was the series I was hoping for last year–two excellent teams shooting it out at high noon.

    That said, I think the Wings are even more likely to prevail than last year because they know what to expect when the Pens play well like tonight.

  144. 144
    Pooh says:

    Pens super unlucky tonight, should be good series.

  145. 145
    geg6 says:

    The Wings got every lucky bounce of the puck and the Pens got every unlucky one. That said, this a much better match up than last year. Should be interesting. And now on to my defense of the absolute gorgeousness of pro hockey players. When the Pens won the Cup back in (I think) ’92, I was invited by a friend to a party. Turns out, the party was at Phil Borque’s house and the Cup was there. Most of the party took place at the pool. Huge men with glistening and perfect pecs and abs and thigh muscles that could crush granite in little bathing suits (albeit, considering the times, also with mullets). Mmmmmmmm. I will say right now that two of the most beautiful specimens of manhood I’ve ever seen in my life were Phil Borque and Bob Errey. I was practically salivating (and they are both stll pretty hot today). Phil Borque held the Cup for me to drink beer from it. That was a hell of a party. And to this day, I look at those guys in those baggy unis careening around that ice and visualize the fineness of the body under all of it. And I have a shirtless Sydney Crosby as my screensaver at work. It, too, is quite yummy.

  146. 146
    rs says:

    The guy from San Jose who grew up in Detroit but roots for the Wings by default didn’t grow up rooting for the Wings. Sports fans are more loyal to their first loves than anyone.
    Hockey players are generally not that big. Fit, yes, but not big like other sports. Pro football players stand out in crowds (width), as do pro basketball players (height).
    By the way, that defensive effort by the Red Wings was accomplished without the services of one of the best defensive centers in hockey and Hart candidate Pavel Datsyuk, who hasn’t played since midway through the Chicago series. Take Malkin out of the Penguins line-up for two weeks of the playoffs and see how far that gets you.

  147. 147
    Hedley Lamarr says:

    Did Cindy cry after the game?

  148. 148
    estraven says:

    I’m from metro Detroit. Yay Wings!!

Comments are closed.