Why Win?

Just a thought- why do the Republicans even bother trying to win elections. They get everything they want when they lose, so why bother trying to win? Nothing but Republicans or GOP talking points on my tv until I turned the DVD player on five minutes ago (Season one of News Radio is much better).

I have had enough of this. Here:

No cable news tonight. Think I will watch a movie or play Mass Effect.

*** Update ***

Exhibit A in the argument that conservatives get whatever they want even when losing: Craig Crawford appears to be seriously arguing that NEWT FUCKING GINGRICH should head Health and Human Services. In bizzaro world, that makes complete sense, as it meets the only criteria that matter to the villagers:

As much as it would infuriate liberals, picking Gingrich would be a hyper-bipartisan move.

It pisses off liberals and would be “bi-partisan,” the only criteria that matter. What’s not to like?

I am seriously buying a generator, a goat, and a plot of land in the mountains for when the shit goes down. These people are killing us.

106 replies
  1. 1
    Joshua Norton says:

    Good lord, I need a lint roller just looking at that picture.

  2. 2
    slag says:

    Must. Pet. Kitty.

  3. 3
    Ruth says:

    That tummy just begs for skritches. Unlike wingnuts telling how we need more tax cuts for the rich and businesses so that they will create jobs. Which will surely happen this time, the last eight years were an anomaly.

  4. 4
    JenJen says:

    Because when you win, you get to do even more cool stuff than when you lose.

    You know, like, you can start a war, or, you can veto S-CHIP even though it’s popular just because you want to, or, you can torture people and say, "What? Who? Me?", or you can refuse DOJ appointments under suspicion of teh gay or teh liberal, plus, you can get all your golf bags and fleeces emblazoned with the Presidential Seal, and they let you keep all that stuff!! Seriously, they let you keep it, you don’t have to give it back! I could go on, but why preach to the choir?

    It’s just cooler to win. It’s also cool to lose, apparently. But it’s always cooler to win because then, you get to do stuff and keep stuff.

  5. 5
    demkat620 says:

    Crawford lost his mind when Hillz lost. He totally believed the CW that she was inevitable and that Obama couldn’t win. He’s still waiting for the media to admit that he was "proved fucking right!"

  6. 6
    Kanamit says:

    Mass Effect? From what I have heard on Fox News, that electronic video game is nothing but pure, unadulterated smut! Smut I say! Shame on you, Mr. Cole.

  7. 7
    slag says:

    Every time I get together with my liberal friends to discuss our plan for world domination, we always look at the Republicans as a role model. The conclusion: Republicans own and control the liberal media. Ergo, we liberals need to start owning and controlling the liberal media.

  8. 8
    amorphous says:

    Not just bi-partisan, John. Hyper bi-partisan.

  9. 9
    JC says:

    As a serious question – why are only conservatives on my TV?

    Is there some collusion between TV execs, at this point in time?

    I’m serious. This is f**king unbelievable.

  10. 10
    Clutch414 says:

    Mass Effect! Awesome game. I’m on my second playthrough.

    PC version, John? How far are you into it? I finished it about a year ago on the 360.

  11. 11
    Barry says:

    About the goat: buy two does and a good buck. The Lamancha (almost no external ears) are a good breed with a gentle temper and good milk producers.

  12. 12
    Evinfuilt says:

    The only true requirement for being viable to villagers is "does it piss of those DFH’s."

  13. 13
    Dave says:

    I already have my generator and a section of my back lot reserved for growing.
    Bi-partisan doesn’t mean jack shit if its fucking stupid to boot.

  14. 14
    John Cole says:

    @Clutch414: Just bought it a couple days ago. Just getting started tonight, for the most part.

  15. 15
    Crusty Dem says:

    I know what you’re thinking – "bipartisan? I don’t think that word means what you think it means." Clearly, our chattering class has a clear definition:

    Bi-partisan = pisses off liberals

    Hyper Bi-partisan = elevates crazy conservative, makes liberals apoplectic

    These people do have a way with words. Unfortunately, that way is to defuse or destroy their meaning in a way that makes intelligent conversation impossible.

  16. 16
    JL says:

    A friend called and said that Obama gave a fairly strong statement in support of the stimulus bill. Did anyone see it?
    I just turned on Hardball and they are letting Dick Cheney have it.

  17. 17

    they try and win elections because it makes it easier to cash out the american people. i mean, look at it. hapless and bumbling though they are, the democratic majorities and president are trying to give money to the american people, whereas the last eight years (minus the last couple weeks) were all about taking all the money they could from us and giving it to their buddies in the private sector.

    that, and they get to start wars, which are totally awesome if you never had to fight in one.

    enjoy your game.

  18. 18
    Clutch414 says:

    @John Cole:

    Enjoy it John. It’s a bit conversation-heavy towards the beginning, but the conversations are well-written and can be pretty amusing if you choose certain (read: asshole-ish) responses. Once you get into the game proper it strikes a real nice balance between action and conversation.

  19. 19
    Svensker says:

    Is that a cat or a giant albino fuzzy bear caterpillar?

    I hate Republicans. Also Harry Reid.

  20. 20
    Clutch414 says:

    Also: Bedding down hot blue-skinned alien science officers. BOOM goes the dynamite!

  21. 21
    Splitting Image says:

    Crawford is just trying to sabotage the conservative agenda by replacing ideas that are nuts but make sense at first glance with ideas that are nuts and make no sense at all.

    Mitt Romney is nuts, but he makes sense at first glance.
    Newt Gingrich is nuts and makes no sense whatsoever.

    The next person they’ll suggest will be Ron Paul.

  22. 22
    lilly Von Schtupp says:

    Fluffeh kitteh.

  23. 23
    Stuck says:

    Luckily, i was delinquent in not following BSG, so now I have four years of catching up to do and a netflix account. Will be frequently jumping into the way hot world of cigar chomping Starbuck. Much, much more stimulus effect.

  24. 24
    Punchy says:

    For the guy who excoriated his commetariat for jumping on every gaffe n not giving Obama some cred for havin a inside plan, this is some exceptional bed wetting and pearl-clutching.

  25. 25
    EdTheRed says:

    Jesus H…something that "infuriates liberals" is not just bi-partisan, but "hyper bi-partisan"? I don’t think that word means what he thinks it means…or, to borrow a phrase from Christian Bale:

    What don’t you f*cking understand? *THINK*, for one f*cking second!

  26. 26
    Xanthippas says:

    Also, I nominate Barry Bonds for Drug Czar.

  27. 27
    Just Some Fuckhead says:

    I do a kickass imitation of Craig Crawford, btw.

  28. 28
    amorphous says:

    @EdTheRed: Don’t mind me, just happy that I get to link the remix twice today.

  29. 29
    Kim says:

    @John Cole: Mass Effect is a great game, but don’t bother doing all the random side missions. Seriously… they are repetitive and take up way too much time… you’ll feel much better sticking to the story, where things remain fun. I tried to be a completist and do all the side missions first… then realized that was 60% of the game time and it was really, really boring. Main story though: awesome.

  30. 30
    bago says:

    Mass Effect Rules! I played through that game almost 6 times to see all of the content! Soldier / Assault Rifle is good for the first time through, then you can go tech or biotic when you want to play crowd control. Manually save often (quicksave needs help), and remember the highest party member decrypt skills are used if you start to feel regret about not being able to open certain doors. (Tali in the houuuse)!

    The Kahoku side missions aren’t tied to the main story, and can be done out of order, but on my second time through I actually hit them all in order and it makes for a nice little suprise. Choose the "renegade" options when discussing your reward with the consort. Also.

  31. 31
    JenJen says:

    @Just Some Fuckhead: Are you available for parties? ;-)

  32. 32
    Michael D. says:

    My favorite line ever from News Radio:

    Dave (to Matthew, who was reading the news): Ahmm, Matthew, it’s Joey Butta-FEW-co

  33. 33
    demkat620 says:

    Yeah, I saw it. It was good. It was a warning to the GOP. The Obama version of "You better check yourself before you wreck yourself"

    But the way he says things.

    From the GOS

  34. 34

    In order for the Republicans to prove they have that bipartisan spirit I say Obama nominates Jocelyn Elders. (The current crew of R’s being a bunch of jerk offs seems to make this even more appropriate.)

  35. 35
    Laura W says:

    @Just Some Fuckhead: Youtube it, Baby, Youtube it!
    If you’ll do that for us, JenJen and I will do our Contessa Brewer and Andrea Mitchell imitations for you.

  36. 36
    Rick Taylor says:

    @JL: A friend called and said that Obama gave a fairly strong statement in support of the stimulus bill. Did anyone see it?

    Found this transcript via Digby and Openleft. It is most welcome.

  37. 37
    JenJen says:

    For serious though, what about just letting the Republicans play their hand? Is there nothing to be said for political patience anymore? I can’t remember a moment in the general election where Obama didn’t end up prevailing, after letting the GOP bluster and sputter.

    I dunno. The more I think about it, the more I think it might be worth it, politically, to just let them go through the motions of their shtick right now, 24-hour-news-cycle and all. To employ a sports metaphor, I’m not at all convinced that the team that scores the most points early in the game wins. Aren’t we in the first quarter, when you really think about it? And does anyone here really believe that "nobody could have predicted" what we’re seeing? Does that include Obama and his team?

  38. 38
    Fencedude says:

    More like first fucking minute of the first quarter.

  39. 39
    MikeL says:

    When I was 15 or so, I read Solzhenitsyn’s Gulag Archipelago. One of his big criticisms of the Soviets was that important managerial positions were handed out based solely on political calculations. Qualifications and competence were just not considered. Stalin would rather have an incompetent that he knew he could trust than a competent that couldn’t.

    It’s getting more and more obvious that that failure wasn’t unique to the Soviets. We have pundits openly calling for the exact same thing, and acting like it’s a good thing. Isn’t it obvious that pissing off your opponents isn’t really a qualification for a managerial position?

  40. 40
    Joshua Norton says:

    As much as it would infuriate liberals, picking Gingrich would be a hyper-bipartisan move.

    Or even better yet, let’s kick Obama out and make Alan Keyes the first black president. That would be teh uber-hyper-bipartisan awesome! !

  41. 41
    D-Chance. says:

    Now this is change we can believe in… a plan to get Democrats to pay taxes. I like the pay-per-view concept… /grins

  42. 42
    torrentprime says:

    Serious question: Are we losing?

    And I’m one of the ones who has been on the the *other* side every time some one asked that question, telling the whiny liberals who didn’t get their way every five seconds to shut up, I’m gay and I didn’t care about Warren praying, I didn’t care every time Obama smiled at a Republican, but for the first time since Nov. 4, I’m starting to wonder. When does the "he plays poker not chess" guy start to win some hands?

  43. 43
    JGabriel says:

    John Cole:

    I am seriously buying a generator, a goat, and a plot of land in the mountains…

    I can’t believe no one’s made any dirty jokes about the goat yet.

    I’m disappointed, people. I really expect better from a site that’s the origin of the phrase "skull fuck a kitten".


  44. 44
    kay says:


    I read it. It’s solid. He says that we shouldn’t adopt the policy that got us here as a remedy.
    That’s a tidy wrap-up of this situation.

  45. 45
    Samuel says:

    why do the Republicans even bother trying to win elections.

    To clean up the messes Democrats leave after 2 1/2 weeks

  46. 46
    Laura W says:


    I can’t believe no one’s made any dirty jokes about the goat yet.

    I made a wanking joke in an earlier thread so I decided to sit that one out. I’m sure John’s intention is for dairy products.

  47. 47
    Comrade Darkness says:

    Gingrich? Yeah, the man who stated that welfare causes men to beat their wives to death… That guy is totally qualified for HHS. We’ll be reappointing Brown to FEMA the same afternoon, right?

    Obama signing the S-CHIP bill There is so much shit to sort out from the previous eight years of fuckitude. One thing at a time, people.

  48. 48
    kay says:


    Obama nominated three Republicans for Cabinet positions.
    One of whom is looking like he has some Abramoff-taint.
    What do you do now?

  49. 49
    dp says:

    Sorry to be vulgar, but… the Republican’s idea of bipartisan is that they will use Vaseline when they put it to us.
    We have to see 2008 as just the beginning and seriously support progressive candidates all over the country, every election. We can’t rest on our laurels. We should also start boycotting the sponsors of the right wing lie machine. Money is the only thing they understand. And remember that the Republican base is dying off.

  50. 50
    Rick Taylor says:

    A video of Representative Gary Ackerman roasting the Securities and Exchange commission enforcement director at Matt Yglesias over their failure to uncover what amounted to a Ponzi scheme, even it was pointed out to tem.

  51. 51
    kay says:

    Obama said the criticisms he has heard "echo the very same failed economic theories that led us into this crisis in the first place, the notion that tax cuts alone will solve all our problems."

    "I reject those theories, and so did the American people when they went to the polls in November and voted resoundingly for change," said the president, who was elected with an Electoral College landslide last fall and enjoys high public approval ratings at the outset of his term.

    I like that.

  52. 52

    I am seriously buying a generator, a goat, and a plot of land in the mountains for when the shit goes down.

    You aren’t sharing a bunker with Mickey Kaus, are you?

  53. 53
    Joshua Norton says:

    so did the American people when they went to the polls in November and voted resoundingly for change,

    Jeebus Tapdancing Keerist. I’ve been waiting for some Dem to lay that can of whup-ass on them. It’s about freaking time. I can stop banging my head against the wall for a little while.

  54. 54
    kay says:

    It’s a negotiation. You have to follow it, dull as it is. They got money for NIH, because Republicans were afraid to block it, it’s "politically problematic for them". I don’t know why. Science isn’t a big priority, on the Right.
    The car tax credit was a Dem proposal, and it passed into the bill with 72 votes.
    You get my point, I’m sure. Despite what Bob the Plumber says, it isn’t black and white.

  55. 55
    JL says:

    Thanks all! Supposedly Obama made another strong statement before signing the SCHIP bill. I can find the statement that was released from the White House that deals with the SCHIP program but that’s all.

  56. 56
    TenguPhule says:

    I am seriously buying a generator, a goat, and a plot of land in the mountains for when the shit goes down.

    You will run out of bullets before the Right runs out of idiots.

  57. 57
    JL says:

    @kay: Thanks for posting his comments. Now if only the MSM would show a clip of Obama saying that. I get the feeling that MSM is still trying to prop Bush’s poll numbers up.

  58. 58
    HyperIon says:

    I am seriously buying a generator, a goat, and a plot of land in the mountains for when the shit goes down.

    don’t forget the chickens….
    can i send in a pic of my (pet) chickens?

  59. 59
    Rainy says:

    Obama basically said: Republicans have no ideas.
    An abundance of tax cuts=FAIL.


  60. 60
    The Populist says:

    Let this play out. I’m with you, John. I watch the nighttime shows and wind up screaming at every GOP bobble head on these shows.

    I think, HOPE, Barack is playing one of his No Drama waiting games. Problem is we are all fracked if this doesn’t get resolved.

    I hope Obama wakes up from this belief being bi-partisan on everything is the way to go. He will get no backup from Reid or Pelosi. For this to change, both need to be removed and replaced.

  61. 61
    HyperIon says:

    @Joshua Norton:

    that can of whup-ass on them

    you have a very different idea of whup-ass from, say, my father.

    what obama said was the verbal equivalent of a strongly worded letter IMO. when do words get backed up by deeds?

  62. 62
    theturtlemoves says:

    Mass Effect is a great game. Make sure to download the Bring Down the Sky add-on pack. Get some extra action and some really nice equipment at the end. The game’s soundtrack is cool, too. With that one and the Halo series, Microsoft Games does know where to find good video game composers. And it is a much more productive use of time than watching the news, for sure.

  63. 63
    torrentprime says:

    @54, @60,
    Ok. I mean, I spent my bonus and stock money last year on Obama and DFA and Move On and Hagan and a dozen no-name random House Democratic hopefuls last year – I’m not about to bail now. But part of the reason I did go so heavily blue is the R after my name – I spent years believing in my party long after I shouldn’t have, long after no one would tell me when it was raining even when the basement was flooded and my feet were wet. I don’t want to make the same mistake again.

  64. 64
    kay says:


    You’re welcome. I work with the segment of the population that get S-CHIP. It’s called Buckeye here. It’s a state run federal insurance program. It’s for middle class children who don’t qualify for Medicaid and have no health insurance.
    They’re not going to be noisy. They’re not an "interest group". There won’t be car horns blaring and wild carousing or anything, but they need it, and their parents vote.

  65. 65
    Joshua Norton says:

    you have a very different idea of whup-ass from, say, my father.

    Compared to the mush-mouth crap that "leaders" like H. Reid have been laying on us, what Obama said is whup-ass enough for the time being.

  66. 66
    JL says:

    @kay: Every parent of school age children should support the increase in medical care for children. All to often children have been sent to school sick because a parent could not afford to take that child to the doctors.

  67. 67
    magisterludi says:

    We’ve talked about setting up a family compound on my widowed mother’s four acres for a year now. Seriously.

    I read The Coming Anarchy back in the early nineties. Kaplan wrote of a "Hegelian society" in America where the prosperous drove in bullet-proof cars to get to their guarded and gated communities.

    And now is the time to invest in the manufacturers of pitchforks and torches. And private security firms.

  68. 68
    JenJen says:

    @Laura W: I’ll need to work on my Andrea Mitchell (shouldn’t be too hard), but my Sarah Palin and Michelle Malkin kills.

  69. 69
    Clockwork Buddha says:

    Might I suggest Fallout 3? It pairs well with Post-Apocalyptic Goat, has an excellent nose (which you can customize…along with chin, eyes, etc.), and is precocious yet turgid.

    Or something…

  70. 70
    The Populist says:

    I have this fear, though, that the American people buy into the tax cut argument since they think there is no SPENDING involved.

    Joe Taxpayer: Gee, tax cuts seem good. I mean they just won’t take as much out of my check!

    Devil’s Advocate: That is not true. Without spending cuts, it won’t do a thing but put $20 extra bucks in your pocket every week and increase the deficit.

    Joe Taxpayer: But the TV people say that this is better.

    Devil’s Advocate: How is that?

    Joe Taxpayer: They say it is, so that’s good. I don’t trust what the Democrats say since they always want to tax me for everything.

    Devil’s Advocate: How do they tax you for everything? Do you enjoy free paved roads? The parks? How about feeling like you can call 911 in case of emergency? What if there’s a fire? What if your loved one needed a paramedic? Community college? Schools for your kids?

    Joe Taxpayer: But why do they have to have unions with all these things?

    Devil’s Advocate: Are you a very rich person? If you aren’t why do you care about unions?

    Joe Taxpayer: The debt they create with their entitlements. It’s not fair.

    Devil’s Advocate: That is part of the cost of doing business. Why would you care? Do these folks not deserve to be paid well for their work?

    Joe Taxpayer: But the entitlements….the debt….we should ban those unions. I work and don’t need a union.

    Devil’s Advocate: Do you get paid well for what you do? Unions make it possible for non-union employees to see higher wages through competition. Again, why care? This is an issue that drives the right and elitist business interests crazy.

    Joe Taxpayer: Those liberals just want to raise our taxes to pay for all of this!

    Devil’s Advocate: So you advocate the stimulus supply just a tax cut, right? How does this put Americans back to work?

    Joe Taxpayer: The guy on the tv said that if you also lower capital gains that would make confidence go up and we can get business to invest.

    Devil’s Advocate: Then how come that didn’t happen in the Bush years?

    Joe Taxpayer: But it did. I got a tax cut and I was getting paid okay.

    Devil’s Advocate: Did you see a raise?

    Joe Taxpayer: None of your business. Answer me this smartguy, why should we pass this stimulus with it’s heavy pork entitlements. For example, why do we need to fund family planning? How does this put Americans back to work.

    Devil’s Advocate: Say what you want but the so-called pork are infrastructure projects that can be started quickly. Family planning is important as it would make people more aware of the costs involved with having more kids. You also hire more specialists there and anytime you hire anybody you create a job.

    Joe Taxpayer: That’s bull. How does fixing a bridge or teaching people to wear rubbers do all this? What about this money slated for increased education spending? That doesn’t create jobs.

    DA: (Sigh). Family planning does not teach about wearing rubbers. Sure, they will give out free condoms but in the end, you create jobs AND teach people about basic economics. As for School spending, are you telling me you think we should continue ignoring our schools?

    JT: Why can’t we farm that out to the private sector? Private schools can teach our kids better you know.

    DA: Did you go to a public school?

    JT: Yes, but…

    DA: Then what’s the problem?

    JT: Private schools can do it cheaper and better.

    DA: Not really. First off for cheaper you’d be giving people tax breaks to send their kids to a private school. That means you spend money to educate them at schools that do not have the same credentialed teachers in place to properly educate and prepare kids for advanced colleges.

    JT: C’mon. There are some really good private schools.

    DA: There are, definitely, but they are the ones that tend to charge more money than most can afford. I’m done here. You just don’t get it.

  71. 71
    The Populist says:


    Change truly does take time. If we didn’t have this economic bomb hanging around our collective necks, I’d agree.

    FYI – I was a hardcore Republican myself once. I can sympathize with how you feel.

    It will happen. Let’s see this play out. Obama has a plan.

  72. 72
    Stuck says:

    Well, I see PJ media adds are back.

    The Third Jihad


    It Describes Teh Grand Jihads goal
    of the Islamic Radicals to destroy western
    civilization from within

    All I can say is, they’d better hurry before Republicans beat them to it.

  73. 73
    Laura W says:

    @JenJen: Oh no…I thought you wanted to be Contessa?
    I’ve decided to be Mika instead. I can make saucy and snappy monosyllabic grunts and quips till the goats come home (Yes. Oh? He did. They did. Stop! It was. Gee. Really. Really? No? It did. Now now. Oh Gosh…)
    Not to mention I have my coquettish eye rolling in the camera’s direction down pat. And I look hot in tight sweaters.

  74. 74
    JenJen says:

    @Laura W: And boots!! You forgot boots.

    Shorter Mika: "Stop! That’s just wrong. I don’t like that. Are my kids going to have to pay for this? Don’t do that anymore! My dad was mean to me but he bought me a Ford Truck and I still drive it. I don’t like that! It’s so wrong. (giggle) Stop! That is not nice!!"

    And weirdly, I’m not even quoting porn.

  75. 75

    The residents of a small mountain town, near a large mountain town, that I am familiar with, were worried about the large mountain town getting hit by a nuke back in the 1950s, or so the lore goes.

    The residents of said small mountain town had a plan in case the residents of said large mountain town decided to relocate. It should also be noted that, gasoline will be hard to come by in the case of World Wide Katrina.

    This is one reason why I have a brick oven and grow potatoes. In my current status, I am available for hire. Have trowel, will travel. Excellent references are available upon request.

  76. 76

    Personally, I’d love to see Newt under the klieg lights of a Congressional hearing. Not gonna happen though because Newt knows he’d melt.

    I am seriously buying a generator, a goat, and a plot of land in the mountains for when the shit goes down.

    I thought these three items were part of every West Virginian’s birthright. Kind of the Appalachian version of frankincense, gold and myrrh.

  77. 77
    headpan says:

    W-e-e-elcome to My World! (sing-song)

  78. 78
    Kim says:

    @Clockwork Buddha: Grab a copy and read Cormac McCarthy’s ‘The Road’ when playing Fallout 3. It makes post-nuclear winter life that much warmer and fuzzier.

  79. 79
    headpan says:

    I am seriously buying a generator, a goat, and a plot of land in the mountains for when the shit goes down. These people are killing us.

    And I really need to go shopping for some ampules of cyanide or whatever the fuck those things are – let me check my Nazi suicide manual. Isn’t that what makes it so rich? It’ll be the good guys offing themselves this time.

  80. 80
    The Populist says:

    Headpan, when you find a supplier let me know costs. I just don’t feel like living in a world that falls apart like that. So I have a gun, food and water. Who’s to say that gangs of a-holes don’t find me and steal it?

    And we know government won’t restore order. Even if they do, it will have to be done at the end of a rifle and involved interning people in camps.

    In my thinking, our system isn’t perfect and could definitely be improved but if the right are not aware that the end will come and we may never fully come back from it, then they are bigger traitors than I thought.

  81. 81
    former capitalist says:

    @Kim: I usually enjoy McCarthy’s writing, but I thought " The Road" was just weird. Too minimalistic for me.

    And, John, let me warn you: goats are a pain in the butt and they stink. Really stink. They’ll eat anything–anything–and they die like flies. On the other hand, a big garden, a few chickens, and a penchant for home canning, and you’ll be as ready for Armageddon as the goofiest Mormon survivalist.

  82. 82
    Jrod says:

    The wackiest idea I’ve been hearing is the notion that building infrastructure doesn’t create jobs. I mean… just, come the fuck on. How can you keep a straight face while you tell me that massive public works don’t create, wait for it… work?

    You almost have to admire the propaganda job the mega-rich have done in this country. A huge number of people are convinced that putting more money in that hands of the rich will not only best fix the economy, it’s the moral thing to do. They seem to think that jobs are created by magic when the wealthy invest their money. Too bad "investment" these days means getting in on the latest scam.

  83. 83
    headpan says:


    picking Gingrich would be a hyper-bipartisan move.

    I was going to try and make some snarky comment but it’s just, uh, uh, whew, these guys um, well, . . .

  84. 84
    Mnemosyne says:

    In my thinking, our system isn’t perfect and could definitely be improved but if the right are not aware that the end will come and we may never fully come back from it, then they are bigger traitors than I thought.

    They’re assuming that when we devolve into a society of Haves and Have Nots, they’ll all end up as Haves living in comfortable gated communities with their own private security guards. Which is all they care about.

  85. 85
    TheHatOnMyCat says:

    It pisses off liberals and would be “bi-partisan,” the only criteria that matter. What’s not to like?

    The only criterion that matters is that we end up with healthcare insurance for everyone, in a program that does not bankrupt the country or degrade the quality of care.

    If I thought Gingrich could get us that, I would be in favor of his getting that job. I don’t think so, and so I am not in favor of it.

  86. 86
    JenJen says:

    @former capitalist: Having grown up on a farm with many, many goats, wherein I was a kid (human) and had to feed them every morning and afternoon, every subsequent goat discussion reminds me of the classic "nailed it!" Onion piece, "Hey, You Got Something To Eat?" It’s so accurate, I’m 99.9% positive that Onion writer was once a kid (human) who had to take care of a goat or thirty.

    Yep. That’s a goat. Pure. Simple. Goat.

    Even if you’re not thinking about acquiring goats, it brings teh funny. Please, to enjoy!

  87. 87
    CT says:

    Cable news coverage of this administration is like listening to the worst set of sportscasters you can think of doing play by play of an NFL game slowed way down so that each play takes about 3 days to run. Almost nothing is happening, but there’s all that airtime to fill with brain dead mouth-breathers speculating about what MIGHT be going to happen in the future, even though all that’s happened so far is that the ball has been snapped.

  88. 88
    Xanthippas says:

    In a related note, hilarity:

    Limbaugh was the least popular of the all the political figures the firm polled. He polls seven points lower than Rev. Jeremiah “God Damn America” Wright and eight points below former Weather Underground domestic terrorist William Ayers.

  89. 89

    This might cheer you up:

    The latest breach came Tuesday during the morning rush hour near Collinsville, Ill., where hackers changed a sign along southbound Interstate 255 to read, "DAILY LANE CLOSURES DUE TO ZOMBIES."

  90. 90
    John H. Farr says:

    I am seriously buying a generator, a goat, and a plot of land in the mountains for when the shit goes down.

    Not that I think this is necessarily a good idea, but accepting that the current system is unsustainable and fucked is a good place to start.

    We don’t all have to live in the woods, though. I tried that almost 40 years ago, while it was actually one of the happiest times of my life, it turned out that THAT was unsustainable. :-) No women, for one thing, and of course the merchants still demanded cash.

    A few years ago I made myself obnoxious commenting here and there that Bush didn’t matter, what was important was knowing how to build a simple solar still to make clean water out of crud. I haven’t tried that yet myself, but I do know how…

  91. 91
    bago says:

    Shorter BoB: "I, for one, welcome the coming apocalypse!"

  92. 92
    Andre says:

    Mass Effect is a very, very nice game. I actually enjoyed it more on the second playthrough, because a lot of it’s about strategy and understanding what effect your decisions will have. (Plus starting with a level 50+ character is a recipe for awesome.)

    Some of the "background" quests might strike you as a little too stereotypical of the "soldier’s issues" variety, but they’re reasonably well done.

    For a a game with a little more in the way of depth and complexity though (not to mention topless babes, drinking games and tavern brawling!) consider The Witcher, based on Andrzej Sapkowski’s books. Sapkowski’s good at writing morally complicated, adult, enjoyable fantasy, and the Projekt Red team created a brilliant homage to this. They got the tone of bleakly absurdist dark fantasy just right.

  93. 93
  94. 94
    Stuck says:

    a goat

    Always go with the all purpose Sheep. Dollies preferable for those long winter nights.

  95. 95
    LItlebritdifrnt says:


    That was hilarious! I keep telling my DH that we need a goat or three for two reasons a) to eat the grass so I don’t have to listen to my DH whine about mowing and b) to piss off Cueball.

  96. 96
    LiberalTarian says:


    Sorry dude. I am going to vote with my feet. Not my country right or wrong … my country when it has a fucking clue. I’m no good German; if the US is in free fall and can’t understand the concept of gravity, it’s time to expat.

  97. 97
    Jrod says:

    If you’re looking for some goats, you should ask Mickey Kaus for advice. He’s familiar with all of the big goat farms. He knows exactly where to find the most virile goats.

  98. 98
    JenJen says:

    @LItlebritdifrnt: Oh, a goat will eat the grass. And then some. Through the years, I’ve grown fond of the little smelly eat-constantly-anything f**kers. Despite their nasty habits, they can be adorable, they’re funny as all hell, and way cooler than cattle. I kinda miss ’em. Once a 4-H kid, always a 4-H kid, eh?

  99. 99
    bhagamu says:

    Mass Effect!

    Great game.

  100. 100
    AnneLaurie says:

    As a serious question – why are only conservatives on my TV?

    Is there some collusion between TV execs, at this point in time?

    Buying & running a TV station takes serious money. People who have serious money don’t like democracy or Democrats — they prefer the Plantation Party fantasies of the leg of the Republican triad which dreams of an America divided between a tiny cadre of pampered aristocrats and a vast underclass of penniless serfs, with a handful of armed thugs, prison guards & Rethug bureaucrats as enforcement. Finding humanoid pilot fish to stand in front of the camera and bleat "conservative" propaganda is easy for people with serious money. A lot of the time, it doesn’t even require a direct transfer of funds from the Serious Money coffers, because the pilot fish & lampreys are more than willing to recite this week’s fReichtard/Talibangelical/Robber Baron talking points just for the thrill of pleasing their would-be masters. SATSQ #eleventy-billion…

    And while we’re discussing humanoid pilot fish, Andy Card was on my TV being shocked, shocked that Obama so disrespects the sacred Office of the President as to not enforce a "respectable" dress code! The President appears in public while not wearing a coat & tie! Oh whatever will the Iranians think of us now!?!

    And the HPF sitting on the other side of the microphone didn’t even have the self-respect to respond, "Truly, Mr. Card, if coats are no longer being worn in the Oval Office, what will a professional coat-holder such as yourself do for a living?"

    Journalism is dead in this country, and its corpse is stinking up the place something terrible.

  101. 101
    Just Some Fuckhead says:

    @Laura W: No way, I got my fucking dignity to think about ya know.

  102. 102
    Roland X says:

    Allow me to join the pro-Mass Effect pile on. That game is full of win.

    While we’re at it, can we send Commander Shepard to debate the Minority Report brigade, please? I would pay good money to see him/her take the Renegade option with Billo. ;-)

    (/) Roland X
    Hope is a phoenix

  103. 103
    Conservatively Liberal says:

    Sorry but someone has to do it and I am more than happy to.

    I am seriously buying a generator, a goat, and a plot of land in the mountains for when the shit goes down.

    John, just make sure that you keep your goat penned up and safe. If myiq2xu GoatBoy finds out you have a goat the poor thing won’t get a moments peace. Same if an ugly old lady comes to your door wanting to know if your goat can play baseball with her grandson.

    That’ll just be myiq2xu in drag, don’t fall for it.

  104. 104
    Clockwork Buddha says:

    @Kim: I kinda sorta did that.

    I made the brilliant decision to read "The Road" on a flight home…from visiting my mom…who had just started chemo.

    A later analysis of my decision included words like "dumb" and "bag" and "hammers". The whole flight, chapter after chapter, I felt the book was burying me under layers of thick, greasy despair. "Oppressive" doesn’t do it justice.

    When I got home, I popped in Fallout 3 as a diversion.

    That book made Megaton look like frakkin’ Newport Beach.

  105. 105
    futzinfarb says:

    I liked the News Radio Joe Rogan. He was a very good ersatz McGyver. Not so much, the bright-eyed Fear Factor tormentor.

  106. 106
    J. A. Baker says:

    @Just Some Fuckhead:

    I do a kickass imitation of Craig Crawford, btw.

    Does it involve a lot of giggling like a schoolgirl, perchance? ‘Cause that seems to be how he goes through every TV and radio interview…

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