Just Making Shit Up

Via Memeorandum, we see that John McCain has a “plan” to balance the budget:

Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) plans to promise on Monday that he will balance the federal budget by the end of his first term by curbing wasteful spending and overhauling entitlement programs, including Social Security, his advisers told Politico.

The vow to take on Social Security puts McCain in a political danger zone that thwarted President Bush after he named it the top domestic priority of his second term.

McCain is making the pledge at the beginning of a week when both presidential candidates plan to devote their events to the economy, the top issue in poll after poll as voters struggle to keep their jobs and fill their gas tanks.

“In the long-term, the only way to keep the budget balanced is successful reform of the large spending pressures in Social Security, Medicare, and Medicaid,” the McCain campaign says in a policy paper to be released Monday.

The McCain administration would reserve all savings from victory in the Iraq and Afghanistan operations in the fight against Islamic extremists for reducing the deficit. Since all their costs were financed with deficit spending, all their savings must go to deficit reduction.”

Look, it is early Monday morning, and I don’t have the energy required to be appropriately derisive of the fantasy that “victory in Iraq” is going to solve our budget problems, so instead just go see James Joyner and Matt Yglesias. Keep in mind that McCain is promising to do all this while also promising to extend the Bush tax cuts AND ramping up military spending all during a bleak economic setting with current deficit projections hovering near 400 billion annually. Oh, and did I mention the aging population and rising health care costs, and the shrinking dollar, and our energy crisis?

There really is nothing else to say other than John McCain is just making shit up.

*** Update ***

Josh Marshall:

I think we may have come to that moment, that quick turn of events, that encapsulates the fact that there is apparently no limit to the howlers and nonsense that John McCain can throw out and still not generate collective guffaws or even scrutiny from the national political press.

Bear with me on this one because it’s genuinely mind-boggling.

Today John McCain is getting lots of press for his new plan to balance the budget during his first term — what can only be called an extraordinarily ambitious promise. The first pick was from Mike Allen’s piece late last night in The Politico.

Now, the general routine is the face of this kind of candidate announcement is that journalists and economists look at the numbers to see if they add up. In most cases, the exercises generates fairly unsatisfying contradictory opinions, with some experts saying one thing and other experts another.

But here’s the thing. McCain doesn’t have any numbers. None. Not vague numbers of fuzzy math. He just says he’s going to do it. Any other candidate would get laughed off the stage with that kind of nonsense or more likely reporters just wouldn’t agree to give them a write up. But this is all over the place.

The title of this post was not an accident. The McCain campaign is, quite clearly, just making shit up. It is really that simple and straightforward. they don’t have any numbers because, again, THEY ARE MAKING SHIT UP.

And the press is playing along.






134 replies
  1. 1
    stevie314159 says:

    If he promises me a balanced budget AND a pony, I might just vote for him!

  2. 2
    SpotWeld says:

    Isn’t that like ‘saving money’ by buying something you don’t really need when it’s on sale?

  3. 3
    El Cid says:

    I have a “plan” to cut all income taxes to zero and eliminate all tariffs and sales taxes while simultaneously growing the economy at 1,000%, increase the Defense budget by a million times, and build an 8 lane superhighway to Mars, all while going back in time and gaining ‘victory’ in Vietnam.

    I am a serious pundit deserving of constant national airtime, and if you ask me any questions I will cry because you are insulting John McCain.

  4. 4
    4tehlulz says:

    ARE YOU QUESTIONING JOHN MCCAIN’S INTEGRITY?

  5. 5
    cleek says:

    peace dividends, bitches!

  6. 6
    TR says:

    How dare you insult John McCain’s service in Vietnam!

  7. 7
    jake says:

    The McCain administration would reserve all savings from victory in the Iraq and Afghanistan operations in the fight against Islamic extremists for reducing the deficit.

    Say what?

    No really, what the flaming hell does that mean?

    Change Iraq & Afghanistan to Eastasia and throw in a few doubleplusgoods and you’ve got a strong case Camp McCain has moved up from ripping off cookie recipes to plagarizing 1984.

  8. 8
    cleek says:

    The McCain administration would reserve all savings from victory in the Iraq and Afghanistan operations in the fight against Islamic extremists for reducing the deficit.

    that’s really a beautiful thing. take the money that we’re currently getting from off-budget “emergency” spending and use it to pay other expenses.

    he wants to use our “emergency” Bank Of China credit card to pay the rent and phone bill, thereby reducing the money that we would normally have to borrow from the First China Bank.

    no wonder the stupid fucker carries $100K credit card debt!

  9. 9
    Keith says:

    Abortions for some, miniature American flags for others! And oh, yeah, world peace for all (except terrorists)

  10. 10
    dslak says:

    1. Victory in Iraq.

    2. ????

    3. PROFIT!

  11. 11
    rufustfyrfly says:

    So… we should expect to see those “savings” at about the hundred year mark, then, right?

  12. 12
    chopper says:

    and here i was thinking that iraq and afghanistan were costing us money. how could i have been so naive.

  13. 13

    Well, isn’t that in the great, modern GOP tradition?

    Pay for everything with tax-cuts, that is.

    But somehow, when you go looking for a personal loan to pay for “stuff”, and the loan officer asks you how you’ll make the loan payments, tell him “oh, I’ll just take a salary cut!” and he just gives you a funny look.

    Must be one of those crypto-democrats, I bet.

  14. 14
    dmsilev says:

    You’ve also got to admire the way he’s hinting at Social Security privatization in the middle of one of the worst stock market periods in the last couple of decades.

    Anyone taking bets on how long it will be before the AARP sends its elite Granny-ninja squad out to enlighten Senator Straight-Talk on the errors of his ways?

    -dms

  15. 15
    Quackers says:

    McCain’s policies are like Mystery Meat. He can claim it’s whatever he says it is on any given day to please whoever he’s in front of.

  16. 16
    jon says:

    Don’t be so hard on it, as it’s not as if this plan lacks merit. It may lack any basis in reality, but not merit.

  17. 17

    When I read that piece it reminded me of this scene from The Man With Two Brains.

  18. 18
    matt says:

    Isn’t that like ‘saving money’ by buying something you don’t really need when it’s on sale?

    That’s hilarious.

  19. 19

    Was talking with my 83 year-old Republican mom last night and she said that she was worrying about what happens when that “socialist” is in the White House. The way she was talking it sounded like she was preparing for the big collapse after the elections. Is this propaganda circulating out there, and can the current administration keep the wolves from the door until January?

  20. 20
    calipygian says:

    You’ve also got to admire the way he’s hinting at Social Security privatization in the middle of one of the worst stock market periods in the last couple of decades.

    Anyone taking bets on how long it will be before the AARP sends its elite Granny-ninja squad out to enlighten Senator Straight-Talk on the errors of his ways?

    The only conclusion I can draw from this is that the High Pandumjrums of the GOP have already thrown in the towel, saying, “Fuck it. We’ve fucked this one up. Let’s lose this one and re-group for 2012.”

    Thats the only way one can reconcile McCain promising to “reform” Social Security in the middle of a stock market meltdown.

  21. 21
    Jim Henley says:

    God DAMN it, 4tehlulz beat me to my joke. CURSE YOU GOOGLE READER!!!

  22. 22
    Punchy says:

    Read in Teh Newzpapah yesserday this unbelieveably stark contrast: For peeps making $2.9 mill+/yr….

    Obama will raise their taxes by $700K

    McCane will lower their taxes by $300K

    That’s a HUGE fucking diff in tax policies. Not sure which is bettah, but it’s night/day on how each of these guys will tax da filthy rich….

  23. 23
    SpotWeld says:

    The only conclusion I can draw from this is that the High Pandumjrums of the GOP have already thrown in the towel, saying, “Fuck it. We’ve fucked this one up. Let’s lose this one and re-group for 2012.”

    I call that the “lemon suck brigade”, instead of getting exactly what they want (as they we told they could under Bush), the core of the far right will disengage from all useful political discourse and just stand in the corner being petulant and making us all suffer the visage of their “sour faces”.

  24. 24
    KevinD says:

    Isn’t that like ‘saving money’ by buying something you don’t really need when it’s on sale?

    Sounds like my ex-wife’s thinking.

  25. 25

    By the way, since McCain’s trying to revive the pitch to destroy Social Security, here’s a simple explanation on just why privatization is so bogus that it singlehandedly destroys the myth that Republicans can be trusted with money.

  26. 26
    dslak says:

    Obama will raise their taxes by $700K

    McCane will lower their taxes by $300K

    But raising taxes on rich people will make them less industrious! Just ask Andrew Sullivan.

  27. 27

    McCain will win the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan because he’s a Vietnam veteran. Kerry couldn’t win those wars because he’s a veteran of Vietnam. Once the wars are won we will find millions of ponies and sell them.

    President McCain will order the Navy to look for pirate treasure. McCain predicts that they will find enough to pay off the nearly ten trillion dollar national debt.
    McCain will shame Congress into allowing companies to drill for diamonds and rubies offshore. Once those diamond and ruby wells start producing we’ll all be on Easy Street.

    During McCain’s boyhood, alchemists were working on transmuting base metals into gold. McCain will call for a National Alchemy Project. This, combined with his Perpetual Motion Initiative will enable every American to drive a solid gold Hummer.

  28. 28
    chopper says:

    mccain has a secret plan to end the country.

  29. 29
    D. Mason says:

    So, let me get this straight. McCain is talking about “overhauling” the social safety net by reforming Social Security, Medicaid and Medicare. At a time when our economy is on the verge of a meltdown and people are worried about having a job next week and how they will get there if they do. I just … wow. You go oldie.

  30. 30
    Scott H says:

    So, John McCain is going to balance the budget on the backs of the elderly, the sick, the disabled, and the poor? Talk about snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.

  31. 31
    ThymeZone says:

    Once his poll deficit gets to double digits, I expect him to announce a secret plan to revive Terri Schiavo.

  32. 32
    Rick Massimo says:

    What they will never, ever, ever get through their heads is that what they call “socialism” is actually something that an overwhelming number of Americans want.

    Or maybe they do know it; they just want to talk us out of it so they can profit.

    I dunno. Either way, they’re stupid.

    P.S.: Yes, I am questioning John McCain’s integrity. What’re you gonna do about it?

  33. 33
    KevinD says:

    So, since there’s already a surplus in Social Security funds helping to mask the deficit already, does this mean McCain will just cut benefits to current recipients?
    Good luck with that. It’ll take a lot of BBQ to sell that idea.

  34. 34
    ThymeZone says:

    How long before this story really catches up to the crazy old motherfucker?

    { cups hand to ear }

  35. 35
    Jeffro says:

    Ah yes, Social Security “reform”. I have a feeling that Senator Get Off My Lawn is about to have a very bad media week.

    Relatively speaking, of course.

  36. 36
    4tehlulz says:

    >>How long before this story really catches up to the crazy old motherfucker?

    Never. SA2SQ

  37. 37
    Wilfred says:

    How long before this story really catches up to the crazy old motherfucker?

    Wow. A crap shooter for President? I see some great ads coming with this: God doesn’t play dice with the world, John McCain might.

    How can this help him the the Xians?

  38. 38
    cleek says:

    How can this help him the the Xians?

    fact #1: he’s not a Democrat.
    fact #2: nothing else is relevant.

  39. 39
    Brian says:

    Wasn’t there some big convention for some Hispanic advocacy group that featured both Barack Obama and John McCain as speakers? And during their speeches, wasn’t Obama cheered and McCain heckled? I read this somewhere, but I can’t remember many of the details, as you can see. Suffice it to say, I wonder how low McCain’s support can go among Hispanics. If current trends hold, he’ll lose what Bush gained easily.

    My biggest worry is that McCain will actually fight this but lose. If that happened, I’d say that the media would swoon, which would enhance his already-ridiculous reputation, but that absolutely nothing would change as far as his plans go. So he’d gain the political cover but still have the intentions of a far-right conservative.

  40. 40
    Grumpy Code Monkey says:

    The first commenter at Yglesias basically mirrors my reaction; what savings? If we cut off all war spending tomorrow we wouldn’t “save” any money; we’d just stop flushing it down the toilet. It’s not like we’re going to get any of that money back.

    calipygian Says:

    The only conclusion I can draw from this is that the High Pandumjrums of the GOP have already thrown in the towel, saying, “Fuck it. We’ve fucked this one up. Let’s lose this one and re-group for 2012.”

    I’ve said more than once that the GOP is taking a dive this year. Hell, if I were a Republican and had a brain (yes, I know that’s one hell of a straight line, but work with me here) I wouldn’t want to touch the shitpile this administration is leaving behind with a barge pole. Leave it for the Democrats to deal with and heckle them from the sidelines. Let the “liberal” media cut them to ribbons for not fixing all the problems in the first week Barack Motherfucking HUSSEIN Obama is President.

  41. 41
    ThymeZone says:

    Mr. Bush will be lucky to leave office with a net gain of five million jobs, far short of the number needed to keep up with population growth. For comparison, Bill Clinton presided over an economy that added 22 million jobs.

    And what does Mr. Bush have to say about this dismal record? “I think when people take a look back at this moment in our economic history, they’ll recognize tax cuts work.” Clueless to the end.

    Krugman in today’s NYT.

    Let’s make sure that Bush’s cluelessness is hung around McCain’s neck like a 500lb deadweight.

  42. 42
    Dork says:

    I plan on balacing my credit card deficit by buying cheaper hookers. And hot wings.

    Somehow, the fat-chick and chicken savings will put me back in black.

  43. 43

    How long before this story really catches up to the crazy old motherfucker?

    The W2-G story is a non-issue. Skipping out on those is a national pastime. I got about halfway through the comments at the GOS, waiting to see if anyone asked whether Obama had ever filed a W2-G for his poker winnings. No one did.

    Let this one go.

  44. 44
    ThymeZone says:

    The W2-G story is a non-issue.

    I think the real story is the extent of the gambling.

    Also, considering that this is a guy who prides himself on a veneer of ethical purity, “everybody does it” is not going to go over too well as a defense. But the real impact will be making him own up to the amount of gambling he does.

  45. 45
    ThymeZone says:

    The W2-G story is a non-issue.

    According to the recent buzz, Obama plays nickel-dime poker for fun with friends, while McCain plays high-stakes games in casinos and is considered a high-roller.

    I don’t think the comparison is apt. If my description here turns out to be accurate, I think exposure hurts only McCain.

  46. 46

    TZ, you only have to look at the humming factories actively seeking workers, the way people are working their way up the ladder, the clamor for new cars, and the still growing economy… Wait, that’s China.
    Never mind.

  47. 47
    CFisher says:

    what savings?

    Yep.

    First, a lot of the Iraq War spending is getting funded through ’emergency expenditures’ which the government, in it’s creative accounting wisdom, doesn’t apply to the overall budget deficit numbers.

    Second, the rest is already being financed by debt.

    So, it’s like a family that makes 20,000 a year and spends 30,000 a year saying they’re going to cut spending by 6,000 dollars and use that money to pay down credit cards.

    In other words, it’s economic madness or stupidity of Bushian proportions.

  48. 48
    GSD says:

    Has John McCain started promising to lengthen penises and tighten vaginas yet?

    The man is nuts.

    -GSD

  49. 49
    ET says:

    This isn’t snark but isn’t McCain the candidate claiming to be in Iraq until it is “won” (whatever that is) even if it takes 100 years? At which point that is way after his administration is over.

    I just can’t take him seriously as a candidate when he spouts this shit. This was worse than some of what Dubya blabbers.

  50. 50
    Andrew says:

    More to the point, Obama isn’t playing nickle-ante poker with his lobbyist buddy’s bankroll.

  51. 51

    If he’s just “making sh*t up,” he needs to go for broke.

    I want a hover bike!

  52. 52
    ThymeZone says:

    TZ, you only have to look at the humming factories actively seeking workers, the way people are working their way up the ladder, the clamor for new cars, and the still growing economy… Wait, that’s China.
    Never mind.

    Wait, McCain is running for president of China?

    Okay, now his campaign actually makes sense.

    “A duck in every wok.”

    I love it.

  53. 53
    4tehlulz says:

    |-|3110 ma1 n4/\/\3 iz j0n mKk4in; 1z ur p3n0r sm411? \/0t 4 m3 & ur p3n0r \/\/1ll gr03 to 0vr 9OOO 1nchez l0ng

  54. 54
    jibeaux says:

    I tried to count all the logistical flaws crammed into that sentence, but I ran out of fingers, toes, and digits on my calculator.

  55. 55

    According to the recent buzz, Obama plays nickel-dime poker for fun with friends, while McCain plays high-stakes games in casinos and is considered a high-roller.

    I think that it’s $1/$3 poker, and Obama is said to be a consistent winner. From the descriptions, I suspect he may have netted more over the years than McCain has. Let this one pass. There might be something to be made over the nature of the gambling done by each of them (though I’m skeptical), but I don’t think the taxes part is a winner.

  56. 56
    Delia says:

    KO will eventually catch the gambling story. And then the folks at FOX will hyperventilate about why Keith hates a war hero, etc., etc.

  57. 57
    4tehlulz says:

    h3110 ma1 n4m3 iz j0n mKk4in; 1z ur p3n0r sm411? V0t 4 m3 & ur p3n0r W1ll gr03 to 0vr 9OOO 1nchez l0ng

  58. 58

    “A duck in every wok.”

    Not to mention the new Martha Stewart cookbook, “99 Ways to Wok Your Dog.”

  59. 59
    4tehlulz says:

    Wait, McCain is running for president of China?

    Well, he was in Mexico for Independence Day. Maybe he’s just campaigning in random countries hoping that one of them will elect him president.

  60. 60
    ThymeZone says:

    Sorry, don’t agree. I think the gambling story is a clear loser for McCain. I’m in favor of plastering it all over MSM until he cries uncle. At this point anything that stresses him works for us. I think he is a walking time bomb.

  61. 61

    McCain’s economic plan reminds me of an old joke;

    “Bob, we’re losing ten cents on each sale of our product!”

    “Don’t worry, Jake, we’ll make it up in volume.”

  62. 62
    srv says:

    We need an official term for this, something like “Dodo Economics”

  63. 63
    Rick Massimo says:

    Also, considering that this is a guy who prides himself on a veneer of ethical purity, “everybody does it” is not going to go over too well as a defense.

    “Everybody does it” is the only reason he wasn’t thrown out of the Senate in the ’80s. “Everybody does it” is his all-purpose answer. And the media (and Republicans like my brother) can turn on a dime and accept it.

  64. 64
    4tehlulz says:

    OT: Obama’s plane makes “unscheduled stop” in St. Louis.

    The first officer said the pilot had a problem controlling the pitch of the plane, requiring an interruption of the flight originally intended to go to Charlotte, North Carolina, to give a speech touting his economic plans to help working families.

    No injuries.

  65. 65
    cleek says:

    We need an official term for this, something like “Dodo Economics”

    or Doodoo Economics

  66. 66
    Delia says:

    TZ is right. And the the fundy base is none too fond of him. He’s been going out of his way making all sorts of off-key moves to woo them because he doesn’t really understand them.

  67. 67
    cs says:

    President McCain will order the Navy to look for pirate treasure. McCain predicts that they will find enough to pay off the nearly ten trillion dollar national debt.

    If McCain was really going to do this, I’d vote for him in a heartbeat, 100 years of war be damned.

    I can just imagine the scene: sometime in the first 100 days, McCain calls the top admiral to the White House and hands him a stack of old maps on yellow parchment, saying “Pick only men you can trust and tell no one else. The salvation of our country lies buried deep under Dead Man’s Point!”

  68. 68

    “Bob, we’re losing ten cents on each sale of our product!”

    “Don’t worry, Jake, we’ll make it up in volume.”

    1st Lt. Milo Minderbinder: Nately died a wealthy man, Yossarian. He had over sixty shares in the syndicate.

    Yossarian: What difference does that make? He’s dead.

    1st Lt. Milo Minderbinder: Then his family will get it.

    Yossarian: He didn’t have time to have a family.

    1st Lt. Milo Minderbinder: Then his parents will get it.

    Yossarian: They don’t need it, they’re rich.

    1st Lt. Milo Minderbinder: Then they’ll understand.

    —–

    Here’s to the rich, who understand things on a more meaningful level than the rest of us. No wonder Babs Bush doesn’t want to trouble her beautiful mind with all the havoc her despotic man-child has wrought.

  69. 69
    dslak says:

    I don’t think McCain’s gambling ought to be an issue. If it does get MSM play, don’t expect them to ignore Obama’s gambling, either.

    Maybe there are more possible McCain voters who might be turned off by their candidate gambling than Obama voters. If so: Win!

  70. 70
    jibeaux says:

    or Doodoo Economics

    Or Not Economics.

    Or The Opposite Of Economics.

    Or Forget Everything You Learned About Economics Or Even If You Never Took Economics You Are Able to Intuit Because You Were Taught How To Add and Subtract in First Grade, John McCain is Taking You To School Again!

    Too wordy?

  71. 71
    AkaDad says:

    To be fair, it really does takes a maverick to base a campaign on failed and incoherent policies.

  72. 72
    jibeaux says:

    AkaDad, permission to use?

  73. 73
    AkaDad says:

    AkaDad, permission to use?

    Permission granted. ;-)

  74. 74
    srv says:

    pilot had a problem controlling the pitch of the plane

    Hillary’s first attempt fails.

  75. 75
    Zifnab says:

    If he’s just “making sh*t up,” he needs to go for broke.

    I want a hover bike pony!

    Fix’d

    I’m still waiting for his Iraqi rendition of the “I Have A Dream” speech.

  76. 76
    Dreggas says:

    and gas will be cheaper due to all that sweet iraqi crude we’ll be getting…

  77. 77

    don’t expect them to ignore Obama’s gambling, either.

    Nickle-dime poker with friends, compared to $50k stakes on casino tables?

    Now the Hillatrolls will come by and explain how playing nickel poker with your buddies will turn off those white hard working white middle class white male white voters. Oh wait …..

  78. 78
    Dork says:

    I’m in favor of plastering it all over MSM until he cries uncle.

    If you can find a media outlet to report it on the 5/6 pm news, I’ll send you $5. Here’s betting I never have to send it.

    Our media cannot let McCane lose.

  79. 79
    jake says:

    And the Ponies of Freedom will sleep soundly on the Strawmen of Victory.

  80. 80
    asl says:

    “Under his plan, the United States will be telling oil producing countries and oil speculators that our dependence on foreign oil will come to an end

    The hilarity is in the details.

  81. 81
    dslak says:

    Nickle-dime poker with friends, compared to $50k stakes on casino tables?

    I’m not saying they’re comparable, but I’m also not in the business of blurring distinctions in order to increase ratings. Also, those who oppose gambling in toto don’t make such distinctions, irrational as that may be.

  82. 82
    w vincentz says:

    Actually, if Johnnie is right about privatizing Social Security, it only means that more of our senior indoor gardeners will expand their grow room operations to provide ever more hydro-weed to supplement their incomes. Sounds like a “win” to me. Where do you think all the money they blow at the craps tables and to the one-armed bandits comes from?

  83. 83
    Zifnab says:

    Nickle-dime poker with friends, compared to $50k stakes on casino tables?

    I’m not saying they’re comparable, but I’m also not in the business of blurring distinctions in order to increase ratings. Also, those who oppose gambling in toto don’t make such distinctions, irrational as that may be.

    McCain’s wife is worth $100 million easy. He has a private jet. Why does he care about blowing $50k on a casino table? They both gamble and if you look at all the red states with state lotteries, gambling clearly isn’t an issue that swings conservative voters against you.

    The best GOoPers could do is claiming that Barack Obama is an elite Vegas Liberal John Edwards hypocrite while burying McCain’s gambling habits under the rug. :-p They’ve been trying that pitch for a month or two now. They’re welcome to keep pitching it.

  84. 84
    Tony J says:

    According to the recent buzz, Obama plays nickel-dime poker for fun with friends, while McCain plays high-stakes games in casinos and is considered a high-roller.

    MSM – “Exclusive – Obama’s gambling problem concealed behind closed-door sessions with ‘friends’. Will this cost him the religious vote?”

    MSM – “Feature – Is John McCain’s similarity to James Bond attracting the DVD Dad demographic? Some say it is.”

  85. 85
    Zifnab says:

    MSM – “Feature – Is John McCain’s similarity to James Bond attracting the DVD Dad demographic? Some say it is.”

    Ga-buh?! The DVD Dad demographic? Who the… what… why? I mean… gi-ba-gway… FAIL!

  86. 86
    jibeaux says:

    1. Victory in Iraq.

    2. ????

    3. PROFIT!

    It’s more complicated than that, dslak. It’s actually a two-step process:

    1. Get elected and wait until 2013.
    2. ??????
    3. VICTORY in Iraq and Afghanistan!
    4. ??????
    5. PROFIT!

  87. 87

    those who oppose gambling in toto

    Okay, you’re not being serious now. There are people who “oppose gambling in toto” and would choose not to vote for a guy who plays nickel poker with his friends, but might choose to vote for the other guy who routinely throws $50k down on a casino crap or poker table?

    Yes, there are idiots out there. But I think McCain already has the idiot vote locked up.

  88. 88

    Obama’s chartered plane had to make an emergency landing this a.m.

    When’s that FISA vote again?

  89. 89

    If you can find a media outlet to report it on the 5/6 pm news, I’ll send you $5.

    Okay. Just go ahead and send the five, and I will see if I can find an MSM story on it.

    Heh.

  90. 90
    libarbarian says:

    I’m so sick of the poor oppressing the rich.

  91. 91
    joe says:

    It would appear that the McCain campaign is still in the initial, “I Has A Bukkit!” phase of this media offensive.

    FYI, I’m referring to an old internet joke featuring a walrus, of which you might or might not be aware.

    John, are you aware of the walrus in question?

  92. 92
    Rick Taylor says:

    I have to say, it’s kind of fun watching you go through in 2008 what I went through in 2000.

  93. 93

    Breaking: Jesse Helms Still Dead.

  94. 94
    Dreggas says:

    joe Says:

    It would appear that the McCain campaign is still in the initial, “I Has A Bukkit!” phase of this media offensive.

    FYI, I’m referring to an old internet joke featuring a walrus, of which you might or might not be aware.

    John, are you aware of the walrus in question?

    We are aware of all internet traditions.

  95. 95
    Tony J says:

    Ga-buh?! The DVD Dad demographic? Who the… what… why? I mean… gi-ba-gway… FAIL!

    MSM – “Special Report – Democrats worried by their candidate’s failure to capture the DVD Dad demographic. Is this the beginning of the end for Obama?”

    Heh.

  96. 96
    Svensker says:

    are you aware of the walrus in question?

    We are all the walrus, now.

  97. 97
    w vincentz says:

    I’m starting to worry about the DW demographic.
    DW= dead walrus.

  98. 98
    nightjar says:

    Okay. Just go ahead and send the five, and I will see if I can find an MSM story on it

    Will do. But will need your account#, routing # . Soon as receive will transfer the 5$.

    And just to be sure please include all account PINS.

  99. 99
    4tehlulz says:

    We are all the walrus, now.

    If we are all the walrus,
    and the walrus was Paul,
    that means that we are all Paul.

  100. 100
    Tax Analyst says:

    The first officer said the pilot had a problem controlling the pitch of the plane, requiring an interruption of the flight originally intended to go to Charlotte, North Carolina, to give a speech touting his economic plans to help working families.

    Was it the first officer or the pilot that was going to make that speech? It’s hard to tell from this paragraph.

    It should be interesting to hear what they have to say, although they probably ought to focus on not crashing the fucking airplane instead and leave the economic planning to the folks who are going to crash the economy anyway.

  101. 101
    Delia says:

    After thinking long and hard about this whole thing while walking my dog I now understand. John McCain will fix the budget deficit with his winnings in Vegas.

  102. 102
  103. 103
    Tax Analyst says:

    Delia Says:

    After thinking long and hard about this whole thing while walking my dog I now understand. John McCain will fix the budget deficit with his winnings in Vegas.

    Yup – “Double-Down” Economics. Clearly this is the Republican answer to the shit-pile they’ve managed to create with all their various incarnations of “Trickle-Down/Voo-doo” economics.

    “McCain” is just another word name for “Nothing left to lose”…

    Whatta campaign slogan!

  104. 104
    Geeno says:

    Actually, he was a 3000 lbs seal in a japanese zoo affectionally known as the LOLrus to LOL cat people.

  105. 105
    liberatemeiexinfernis says:

    I really am beginning to question McCain’s sanity here. Even as a politician, he fails to be cunning. Damn if I were running for any office, would I wanna be telling senior citizens that I am gonna take away the one thing that lets them retire in some dignity, especially in this crappy economic climate? Seriously who is advising him and which demographic is he pandering to????

    oh and btw, ramping up military spending is a cute phrase. if we go to war with Iran ,which I am sure a President McCain would do to get re-elected to second term, we will be entering a whole new dimension of economic pain that I cannot even begin to describe. any sort of govt assistance that hasnt been plundered and pillaged by Bush will definitely be done by McCain to support his war efforts with Iran.

  106. 106
    w vincentz says:

    If Paul was the walrus, who was the carpenter?
    http://www.jabberwocky.com/carroll/walrus.html

    Oyster=American voters

  107. 107

    would I wanna be telling senior citizens that I am gonna take away the one thing that lets them retire in some dignity, especially in this crappy economic climate?

    Not to worry! Wins in Iraq will help us pay for the new market-based Social InSecurities Program. The Social InSecurity Administration will be greeted as Liberators.

  108. 108
    johnosahon says:

    “The McCain administration would reserve all savings from victory in the Iraq and Afghanistan operations in the fight against Islamic extremists for reducing the deficit. Since all their costs were financed with deficit spending, all their savings must go to deficit reduction.”

    that statement is the dumbest statement i have ever seen in my 25 years of existence. DAMN, i thought the bush administration was the worst thing ever, McBush’s administration is going to be worse. PEOPLE PLEASE VOTE FOR OBAMA IN NOVEMBER, i can’t DO THIS AGAIn, I JUST CAN’T.

  109. 109
    johnosahon says:

    “The McCain administration would reserve all savings from victory in the Iraq and Afghanistan operations in the fight against Islamic extremists for reducing the deficit. Since all their costs were financed with deficit spending, all their savings must go to deficit reduction.”

    that statement is the dumbest statement i have ever seen in my 25 years of existence. DAMN, i thought the bush administration was the worst thing ever, McBush’s administration is going to be worse. PEOPLE PLEASE VOTE FOR OBAMA IN NOVEMBER, i can’t DO THIS AGAIn, I JUST CAN’T.

  110. 110
    johnosahon says:

    “The McCain administration would reserve all savings from victory in the Iraq and Afghanistan operations in the fight against Islamic extremists for reducing the deficit. Since all their costs were financed with deficit spending, all their savings must go to deficit reduction.”

    that statement is the dumbest statement i have ever seen in my 25 years of existence. DAMN, i thought the bush administration was the worst thing ever, McBush’s administration is going to be worse. PEOPLE PLEASE VOTE FOR OBAMA IN NOVEMBER, i can’t DO THIS AGAIn, I JUST CAN’T.

  111. 111
    nightjar says:

    O/T but R.I.P.

    Sadly, we will be hearing about such tragedies for years to come.

    With no mention from the wingnut keyboard Commandos about the real cost of war. They’re happy to see sacrifice — just not from themselves. Fuck Bush and the cowardly Neocon ghouls.

  112. 112
    Punchy says:

    Damn if I were running for any office, would I wanna be telling senior citizens that I am gonna take away the one thing that lets them retire in some dignity, especially in this crappy economic climate? Seriously who is advising him and which demographic is he pandering to????

    Who said he’s doing this? Who? McCane didn’t say this explicitly, and the media agrees that any interpretation that thinks that is completely wrong.

    No, he intends to balance the budget by getting rid of “waste”. CNN says you’re too fucking stoopid, and they’re too damn busy, to explain exactly how that works, so just buy it and STFU.

  113. 113
    Delia says:

    I really am beginning to question McCain’s sanity here. Even as a politician, he fails to be cunning. Damn if I were running for any office, would I wanna be telling senior citizens that I am gonna take away the one thing that lets them retire in some dignity, especially in this crappy economic climate? Seriously who is advising him and which demographic is he pandering to????

    Well, I at least thought they brought in Stevie Schmidt to stop this sort of hilarity. I mean, what good is a Rovian is this is what comes out?

  114. 114
    Delia says:

    Well, I at least thought they brought in Stevie Schmidt to stop this sort of hilarity. I mean, what good is a Rovian is if this is what comes out?

    fixed

  115. 115
    liberal says:

    liberatemeiexinfernis wrote,

    Damn if I were running for any office, would I wanna be telling senior citizens that I am gonna take away the one thing that lets them retire in some dignity, especially in this crappy economic climate? Seriously who is advising him and which demographic is he pandering to????

    I could be mistaken, but my recollection is that in the past, privatization efforts (maybe something Bush 43 proposed) involved promising current and soon-to-be SS beneficiaries all that Uncle Sam already promised them, but screwing people like me who have already dumped lots of money into the system but are nowhere near retirement age.

  116. 116
    liberal says:

    CFisher wrote,

    First, a lot of the Iraq War spending is getting funded through ‘emergency expenditures’ which the government, in it’s creative accounting wisdom, doesn’t apply to the overall budget deficit numbers.

    I don’t think that’s actually true.

  117. 117
    Tax Analyst says:

    liberal Says:

    CFisher wrote,

    First, a lot of the Iraq War spending is getting funded through ‘emergency expenditures’ which the government, in it’s creative accounting wisdom, doesn’t apply to the overall budget deficit numbers.

    I don’t think that’s actually true.

    Well, last I heard the Iraq expenditures were NOT being included in the regular budget or in deficit calculations. I don’t know if they are called “emergency expenditures” or not, but I do know that this practice is patently dishonest.

  118. 118
    Dreggas says:

    McCain camp clarifies their statement:

    It’s pretty straightforward, as we win, costs will go down with a smaller footprint over time, and those savings will go to deficit reduction. It’s really the logical extension of Senator McCain’s position as articulated in the 2013 speech. Achieving success in Iraq would obviously lead to reduced expenditures on the effort.

    H/T TPM

  119. 119
    Zifnab says:

    I’ll see that and raise you a bicycle-riding hover pony (with sparklesJuly 7th, 2008 at 12:19 pm

    You win this round…

    Was it the first officer or the pilot that was going to make that speech? It’s hard to tell from this paragraph.

    It should be interesting to hear what they have to say, although they probably ought to focus on not crashing the fucking airplane instead and leave the economic planning to the folks who are going to crash the economy anyway.

    I would suggest that Obama stop jetting around the country in light aircraft. It’s not like we haven’t lost a small host of celebrities to airplane crashes on a rather routine basis. I mean, they’ve got a website listing them all and everything.

    Senator Paul Welstone, Singer and R&B vocalist Aaliyah, Game show host Peter Tomarken, New York Yankees baseball pitcher Cory Lidle, JFK Jr back in ’99. :-p Small planes != Safe flight. But everyone time a puddle jumper kisses pavement, we all have to start raising conspiracy theories. Here’s a conspiracy theory for you: Cessna makes shitty planes. The end.

  120. 120

    […] Just Making Shit Up […]

  121. 121

    Here’s a conspiracy theory for you: Cessna makes shitty planes. The end.

    Kennedy flew a perfectly good airplane into the ocean, and Lytle flew one into a building. There was nothing “shitty” about either aircraft. Neither of them were Cessnas, BTW.

    Boeing 767 airplanes dont do that well when flown into the ocean or into buildings either.

    Cessna is a premier builder of aircraft. Here’s one of their products you can pick up for $5m or so.

  122. 122
    4tehlulz says:

    I would suggest that Obama stop jetting around the country in light aircraft.

    He was in an MD-80, not exactly a Cessna. His 757 was in the shop.

  123. 123
    CJ says:

    It’s pretty straightforward, as we win, costs will go down with a smaller footprint over time, and those savings will go to deficit reduction. It’s really the logical extension of Senator McCain’s position as articulated in the 2013 speech. Achieving success in Iraq would obviously lead to reduced expenditures on the effort.

    How can we realize any savings that can be used to pay down the budget deficit if we continue to borrow most of what goes to Iraq? Wouldn’t we simply borrow less after which there won’t be any money left to balance budgets/pay down deficits?

  124. 124

    Isn’t Obama using the same justification when claiming that all his new programs are paid for? He quite often brings up the $12 billion a month we spend in Iraq, but if we just transfer that spending elsewhere, won’t we still be borrowing the money for the new spending?

  125. 125
    Just Some Fuckhead says:

    If only the U.S. could marry a wealthy country like China..

  126. 126
    David Hunt says:

    McCain’s economic plan reminds me of an old joke;

    “Bob, we’re losing ten cents on each sale of our product!”
    “Don’t worry, Jake, we’ll make it up in volume.”

    The really funny part is that the Republicans actually seem to think that they can make this up in volume…if you define volume as “loudness” instead of “number of units sold.” Just say something over and over again as loud as you can and enough people will believe it and elect you.

    Lord, that’s sad.

  127. 127
    Just Some Fuckhead says:

    The really funny part is that the Republicans actually seem to think that they can make this up in volume

    They been raising more Gov’t revenue by cutting taxes for the last 26 years. When you can ski the K12 defy the laws of mathematics, everything else looks easy.

  128. 128
    David Hunt says:

    Isn’t Obama using the same justification when claiming that all his new programs are paid for? He quite often brings up the $12 billion a month we spend in Iraq, but if we just transfer that spending elsewhere, won’t we still be borrowing the money for the new spending?

    I’ve wondered about that to. I don’t how much letting the Bush tax-cuts expire will generate, but I’m sure that it isn’t enough to pay for Iraq. My W.A.G is that he’s planning on raising the capital gains tax and the estate tax, as getting rid of Republican cuts to those taxes is favorite Democrat revenue source. I’d speculate that he hasn’t mentioned this because he’s a politician running for elected office. Even if he thought that he could get elected while saying that (because he’s running while GWB is President), it would tend to get rid of any “coattails effect.” That’s my idea. I’ll grant that I pulled it out of nowhere, but the title of the main post does mention “just making shit up.” :)

  129. 129
    Tax Analyst says:

    I would suggest that Obama stop jetting around the country in light aircraft. It’s not like we haven’t lost a small host of celebrities to airplane crashes on a rather routine basis. I mean, they’ve got a website listing them all and everything.

    Senator Paul Welstone, Singer and R&B vocalist Aaliyah, Game show host Peter Tomarken, New York Yankees baseball pitcher Cory Lidle, JFK Jr back in ‘99. :-p Small planes != Safe flight. But everyone time a puddle jumper kisses pavement, we all have to start raising conspiracy theories. Here’s a conspiracy theory for you: Cessna makes shitty planes. The end.

    For whatever reason(s) small planes seem to go down more often than the big-assed jets. Maybe if looked at by “percentage of overall flights” it wouldn’t be out of line, I have absolutely no idea about what that would show. Assuming that well-known people still get on large commercial flights I’d have to comment that I can’t remember the last time I heard of one dying in a plane crash involving a large commercial flight. Compare that to the roll-call of the well-known who have perished in smaller aircraft.

    Yeah, I’d prefer our candidate eschew light-aircraft flights.

    PS – personally, I hate flying…period.

  130. 130

    For whatever reason(s) small planes seem to go down more often

    That’s because many of them are flown by people who should not be flying them, don’t have the experience to handle whatever situation they got themselves into, are minimally trained, and don’t follow best safety practices.

    Whereas corporations and airlines do not hand the keys to $5m bizjets or $100m jetliners to people who are not qualified and experienced and trained to operate them in a professional manner.

    The airplanes are not the problem, the operators are the problem.

    John Kennedy and Cory Lidle, two examples from this thread, should never have been in the situations they were in. They were both basically accidents looking for a place to happen.

    For the record, I was a flight instructor for some years. So that’s where I am coming from in this context. And as we like to say in the flight shack, airplanes are the safest things on earth. Depending on who is flying them, of course.

  131. 131
    Keifus says:

    The McCain administration would reserve all savings from victory in the Iraq and Afghanistan operations in the fight against Islamic extremists for reducing the deficit

    Look, it’s a perfectly accurate statement when you consider that the savings, and deficit reduction (and probably the victory) will be negative values. Johnny’s going to keep up the formula going of borrowing deeply to keep the gravy pouring. It’s got us this far.

  132. 132

    When the war in Afghanistan started, I remember reading a piece by a high ranking special forces military officer who crunched the numbers. He said we’d be sending million dollar cruise missles to blow up $50 worth of camping equipment at their “training camps.” At that rate, he said, they’d bleed us dry economically alone.

  133. 133
    TenguPhule says:

    Has John McCain started promising to lengthen penises and tighten vaginas yet?

    What John McCain does with bell weights and Alum is his own damn business.

  134. 134
    Tax Analyst says:

    For whatever reason(s) small planes seem to go down more often

    That’s because many of them are flown by people who should not be flying them, don’t have the experience to handle whatever situation they got themselves into, are minimally trained, and don’t follow best safety practices.

    Which is a good reason for a Presidential candidate NOT to fly on them, isn’t it?

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