More Fun at the McCain Store

This place is the gift that keeps on giving. Via the comments section at the GOS, we see that you can also purchase the McCain Nautical Lapel Pin for the modest price of $200.00:

Take it away, GOS:

The flippin’ $200 boat lapel pin (what’s this, a yacht tax?), spells his initials with nautical flags. Thing is, nautical flags also refer to conditions. The flags mean:

J – Juliet – On Fire, Keep Clear
S – Sierra – Engines Going Astern
M – Mike – I Am Stopped

Perfect metaphor for the whole dang campaign.

We rate this a “Heh-Indeedy!”






72 replies
  1. 1
    PaulW says:

    Towels, John. Just stick to selling towels…

  2. 2
    Incertus says:

    That is too fucking funny. It’s almost as though McCain’s campaign has been infiltrated with Democratic operatives–or conversely, that it’s been staffed with fucking morons.

  3. 3

    […] Posted by Greg on June 11, 2008 Doesn’t the McCain campaign screen this stuff? […]

  4. 4
    dianeb says:

    If people had only known to consult the flags 8 years ago.

    G–Golf–Want a Pilot

    W–Whiskey–Requite Medical Assistance
    B–Bravo–Dangerous Cargo

  5. 5
    ThymeZone says:

    I am looking forward to the “John McCain Reporting For Duty” acceptance speech.

  6. 6
    pfrets says:

    Damn…screen, meet coffee spray.

    That was too damn funny.

  7. 7
    OriGuy says:

    B – Bravo – Dangerous Cargo
    H – Hotel – Pilot On Board
    O – Oscar – Man Overboard

    Not sure that’s any better, although I like the “Pilot On Board”. Maybe the “Man Overboard” is GWB.

  8. 8
    OriGuy says:

    Now that I think about it, after seeing dianeb’s comment, it makes perfect sense. Bush is the dangerous cargo, Obama is the pilot who comes onboard to guide the ship, and tosses the dangerous cargo overboard.

  9. 9
    Dennis - SGMM says:

    You guys are going to eat your words when you see the John McCain Lunch Box. At only $750 per, average working guys will snap them up to show their support for Johnny.

  10. 10
    TheFountainHead says:

    I’m sorry, but who sat down at a meeting and said, “You know what, nautical lapel pins are a great idea!”

  11. 11
    fuddmain says:

    You guys are going to eat your words when you see the John McCain Lunch Box. At only $750 per, average working guys will snap them up to show their support for Johnny.

    The perfect vessel for cottage cheese lime jello salad.

  12. 12
    jake says:

    [Wipes chili from monitor]

    What a beautiful thing. As an added bonus, yacht pins are not at all elitist.

  13. 13
    RSA says:

    I can’t be the only one immature enough to think that the initials J[i]SM are an attempt to counteract the bad press about McCain’s advanced age, can I? Maybe Bob Dole was consulted on this one.

  14. 14
    abiodun says:

    This lapel pin better be made of gold or silver! In any case, it is dumb.

  15. 15
    abiodun says:

    I meant gold or diamond!

  16. 16
    Bubblegum Tate says:

    We rate this a “Heh-Indeedy!”

    I’d even go so far as to rate it as a “Heh–Indizzley-dozzley-doo!”

    I know he’s dead and all, but I keep expecting Allen Funt to jump out from behind McCain’s backdrop to let everybody in on the joke.

  17. 17
    jibeaux says:

    It’s awesome, and it’s sequential, for heaven’s sake. We are currently in On Fire, Keep Clear. Election Day will start with Engines Going Astern, to be followed rapidly by I Am Stopped.

  18. 18

    […] Later update: From the comment thread at DKos, via John Cole.  You just can’t make this stuff up. […]

  19. 19
    rob! says:

    Allen Funt to jump out from behind McCain’s backdrop

    even Allen Funt knew you don’t use sickly green on TV.

  20. 20
    dr. bloor says:

    McCain Nautical Lapel Pin

    “Looks like the bees knees on your yachting blazer, or even better, your favorite lady’s blue dress.”

  21. 21
    brklyngrl says:

    Looks like Nautical McCain comes in a hat, too. Going for the all-important yachting demographic this campaign season, I see.

    Also, am I correct in assessing that the McCain store, with the exception of $50 Ladies Polo, does not offer any women’s apparel?

  22. 22
  23. 23
    Zifnab says:

    B – Bravo – Dangerous Cargo
    H – Hotel – Pilot On Board
    O – Oscar – Man Overboard

    Not sure that’s any better, although I like the “Pilot On Board”. Maybe the “Man Overboard” is GWB.

    I think it indicates he’s going to turn the ship of state into a cruise missile of America-hating suicide bomber hood.

  24. 24
    SpotWeld says:

    Why would anyone pay $200 to look like the night manager of a Long John Silver’s?

  25. 25
    Dreggas says:

    But hey, it’s a lapel pin with flags on it AMIRITE!?!

  26. 26
    wingnuts to iraq says:

    they say a man should always dress for the job he wants…

  27. 27
    jake says:

    Also, am I correct in assessing that the McCain store, with the exception of $50 Ladies Polo, does not offer any women’s apparel?

    Hmm. That would mean the pink and lime green polos are for men.

    Yeah I know pink is OK. But not THAT pink. And not from the Mantastic Men club that is the GOP.

    Note: There’s no excuse to wear that color green. Ever.

  28. 28
    Liz says:

    Wow, yachting-themed lapel pins, golf supplies… yup, courting the regular joe. At least the regular joes with yachts or golf clubs.

  29. 29
    JC says:

    I’m voting against McSame, just like any other rational being – but there is another like at GOS, that actually, make me like the guy more.

    Link here

    He could be posting HERE at Balloon Juice, and get along just fine:

    Speaking at a luncheon at which McCain was in attendance, former Phoenix Mayor Paul Johnson was among a group of local mayors fielding questions from the Arizona Congressional delegation about local land issues. In the midst of one answer from Johnson, who helmed the city from 1990 to 1994, McCain blurted out, “Hold it a minute. Somebody write down everything this guy has to say. You know what, we need to record him. It’s best to get a liar on tape.”

    Is there someone who thinks that Johnson ISN’T a liar?

    McCain became infuriated, jumping from his chair and calling his fellow Republican a “shithead,” prompting an immediate demand for an apology. McCain stood up again and issued it…sort of. “Okay, I apologize,” he said. “But you’re still a shithead.”

    What’s not to like about that?

    In staunch disagreement with a particular portion of a budget amendment, McCain exploded. “Only an asshole would put together a budget like that.” Domenici, who’d been in the Senate nearly 30 years by that point, gave a restrained reply, noting that even in the most heated debated throughout his entire career, no one had ever used that kind of language toward him. McCain didn’t back down. “I wouldn’t call you an asshole unless you really were an asshole.”

    Pete Domenici IS an asshole!!

    3. After a blistering commentary by McCain, Grassley took offense. “Are you calling me stupid?” he asked.

    McCain didn’t miss a beat. “No, I’m calling you a fucking jerk.

    Ha-ha! Belongs here on Balloon Juice!!

  30. 30
    JC says:

    Note, of course, that if Obama was found using this type of language, it would be the end of him – the “angry black man”, and all.

    IOKIYAAR, is still indeed in full force.

  31. 31
    JGabriel says:

    Ah, but my favorite part is the In The News section (emphasis added):

    06.11 ICYMI: Barack Obama Says He Voted With President Bush “For The Most Part”

    06.10 ICYMI: “Okla. Dem Calls Obama Liberal, Declines To Endorse”

    06.10 Remarks by John McCain at the NFIB and eBay 2008 National Small Business Summit

    06.10 Barack Obama‘s Agenda For Higher Energy Taxes

    06.09 Statement On Obama Campaign And Subprime Mortgage Lenders

    06.09 ICYMI: McCain Campaign Conference Call On Barack Obama‘s Economic Speech

    Six stories, and five of them feature Obama?

    Thanks for the free advertising, John.

    Seriously, ‘News’ sections at similiar sites are usually a mix of PR releases and links to news stories emphasizing the candidate’s own positive achievements. I’m guessing McCain doesn’t have any?

    I mean, they’re not doing anything to promote McCain as a candidate, just tearing at Obama. They’re making no appeal to anyone outside of McCain’s already diminishing base.

    Weird and incompetent. And pretty funny.

    .

  32. 32
    Martin says:

    Laura Bush’s Airstream. (h/t Wonkette)

    McCain should sell these on his website. I wonder if they slow the plane down to 20MPH when going over mountains when that thing is on board?

  33. 33
    JGabriel says:

    JC:

    Ha-ha! [McCain] Belongs here on Balloon Juice!!

    Better here than the Oval Office…

    .

  34. 34
    RSA says:

    Ah, but my favorite part is the In The News section (emphasis added)

    Check out the Republican National Committee Web page. 8 mentions of Obama, 0 of McCain. You’d never know who the Republican candidate was, from reading their front page.

  35. 35
    cleek says:

    Laura Bush’s Airstream dog crate.

  36. 36
    Keith says:

    It looks like some combo move for a PS3 game: “Smile” “Give a thumbs up” “Insult your wife”

  37. 37
    JGabriel says:

    The Fountainhead:

    I’m sorry, but who sat down at a meeting and said, “You know what, nautical lapel pins are a great idea!”

    Honestly, I’m more interested in the guy who responded, “Yeah! And $200 would be a great price point!”

    Now that’s a fucking idiot.

    .

  38. 38
    cbear says:

    This place is the gift that keeps on giving. Via the comments section at the GOS, we see that you can also purchase the McCain Nautical Lapel Pin for the modest price of $200.00:

    What’s next? Captain Hazelwood John McCain nautical bobblehead dolls for $1000.

  39. 39
    Cyrus says:

    JGabriel Says:
    Ah, but my favorite part is the In The News section (emphasis added):

    06.11 ICYMI: Barack Obama Says He Voted With President Bush “For The Most Part”

    I liked that one. Maybe I should just follow the link, but I’m unclear on how that’s an attack. “Barack Obama says he voted with President Bush ‘for the most part,'”… but not always? For shame, Obama. Or, alternately, maybe McCain is saying that Obama shouldn’t have even voted for Bush that much? Or saying that Obama is only pretending to be liberal now but he actually has been willing to work with the administration? Or the reverse, that they can take for granted that he hasn’t voted with Bush much so if Obama’s saying he has, then he’s lying?

  40. 40
    The Moar You Know says:

    I keep trying to think of ways to troll McCain supporters but McCain keeps coming up with better ideas than mine.

  41. 41
    JGabriel says:

    RSA:

    JGabriel: Ah, but my favorite part is the home page In The News section (emphasis added)

    Check out the Republican National Committee Web page. 8 mentions of Obama, 0 of McCain. You’d never know who the Republican candidate was, from reading their front page.

    And filled with photos and montages of Obama with nary a sight of McCain to be found.

    Instead of “Vote McCain”, the campaign theme really is “Vote Against The Negro”.

    Jackasses.

    .

  42. 42
    Cyrus says:

    And re: the original post, to be fair, we can’t read too much into the meaning of the nautical signs, because something like of those are distress signals of various kinds. Anyone whose initials include only the following letters A, B, D, E, F, J, M, N, O, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y or Z would wind up looking pretty stupid, if rendered to nautical signal flags.

  43. 43
    slag says:

    What else would you expect from a man who calls his wife the “Seaward”?

  44. 44
    JGabriel says:

    The Moar You Know:

    I keep trying to think of ways to troll McCain supporters but McCain keeps coming up with better ideas than mine.

    You should check out the Rick Davis Strategy Briefing, wherein Davis’s Powerpoint presentation shows 537 Electoral votes, rather than the correct 538.

    They had a lot of fun with that over at Nate Silver’s (aka Poblano) website the other night.

    .

  45. 45
    phobos says:

    Check out the Republican National Committee Web page. 8 mentions of Obama, 0 of McCain. You’d never know who the Republican candidate was, from reading their front page.

    They used to have a web poll on their “Meet Barack Obama” ratfuck page. Something along the lines of “Do you think Barack Obama is qualified to be president? (yes/no)”. The results were apparently not what they expected.

    Being quick on their feet, they’ve since changed it to “What do you believe to be Barack Obama’s greatest weakness as a Presidential Candidate?”.

    Internet savvy, we haz it.

  46. 46
    Thelonius says:

    Laura Bush’s Airstream dog crate FEMA trailer.

  47. 47
    cleek says:

    re: the original post, to be fair, we can’t read too much into the meaning of the nautical signs, because something like of those are distress signals of various kinds.

    another reason to have avoided a sea-flag lapel pin in the first place.

  48. 48
    nightjar says:

    Hey it takes a lot of Deutschmarks to run against Putin for PResident of Germany.

  49. 49
    Grumpy Code Monkey says:

    Anyone whose initials include only the following letters A, B, D, E, F, J, M, N, O, S, T, U, V, W, X, Y or Z would wind up looking pretty stupid, if rendered to nautical signal flags.

    I am so screwed.

    I am On Fire, Disabled, and Carrying Dangerous Cargo.

  50. 50
    Dreggas says:

    Being quick on their feet, they’ve since changed it to “What do you believe to be Barack Obama’s greatest weakness as a Presidential Candidate?”.

    Internet savvy, we haz it.

    the only thing weak is his opponent.

  51. 51
    Voice of Reason says:

    A $200 yachting pin, and somehow Obama is the elitist?

  52. 52
    NonWonderDog says:

    “All purchases are contribution to John McCain 2008 and count toward your contribution limit.”

    So, kickbacks. Donate $50, get some golf balls; donate $200, get a nautical-themed pin; donate $100,000 in bundles, get favourable legislation rammed through congress. In the McCain campaign, bribery works on a sliding scale.

  53. 53
    BM says:

    Hmm. $200 for a pin? Is this a loophole in campaign finance limits and reporting requirements? What’s to stop Jack Abramoff from anonymously buying 1000 John McCain Yacht Lapel Pins?

  54. 54
    AnneLaurie says:

    What was the name of the clueless rich fvck character on Gilligan’s Island — Thurston Howell III? Didn’t he wear a yatching costume, too?

  55. 55
    KRK says:

    Cyrus Says:

    And re: the original post, to be fair, we can’t read too much into the meaning of the nautical signs, because something like of those are distress signals of various kinds.

    I don’t know. They’re pretty on the money for me:

    Kilo – I wish to communicate with you.
    Romeo – no meaning (alt. meaning: Preparing to replenish. snack?)
    Kilo – I wish to communicate with you

  56. 56
    jake says:

    What was the name of the clueless rich fvck character on Gilligan’s Island—Thurston Howell III? Didn’t he wear a yatching costume, too?

    Yers, Lovey.

  57. 57
    Calouste says:

    nightjar Says:

    Hey it takes a lot of Deutschmarks to run against Putin for PResident of Germany.

    June 11th, 2008 at 2:28 pm

    McCain probably thinks they still use Deutschmarks in Germany, although he is most likely to refer to them as Reichsmarks.

  58. 58
    Should Know Better says:

    O – Oscar – Man Overboard

    “Pushing someone off the yatch’ is the new ‘throwing someone under the bus’!

  59. 59
    Blue Raven says:

    I am On Fire, Disabled, and Carrying Dangerous Cargo.

    I am Dangerous Cargo Disabled, Stand Clear. Pleasure to meet you.

  60. 60
    rawshark says:

    I mean, they’re not doing anything to promote McCain as a candidate, just tearing at Obama. They’re making no appeal to anyone outside of McCain’s already diminishing base

    Why should they? McCain’s running for president against a black guy. Why bother to make your case. Just keep the focus on his skin color and wait for all the ‘I’ll never let a black man be president of my country’ people to do your work for you.

  61. 61
    maxbaer (not the original) says:

    “Pushing someone off the yatch’ is the new ‘throwing someone under the bus’!

    That’s beautiful! I really hope that it catches on.

  62. 62

    […] John Cole translates the flags that spell out McCain’s initials to get the nautical meaning: […]

  63. 63
    Notorious P.A.T. says:

    Why would anyone pay $200 to look like the night manager of a Long John Silver’s?

    they say a man should always dress for the job he wants…

    Win.

  64. 64

    […] Posted in Election, GOP at 7:15 pm by LeisureGuy From Balloon Juice, this funny note. McCain’s site sells various accessories (e.g., golfing equipment), along with this nautical lapel pin: […]

  65. 65
    ByerlyTurk says:

    On a more serious note, you might find it interesting how this dovetails into what some people have been saying for 41 years about McCain’s role in the USS Forrestal fire that killed 138(?) sailors…

    The admirial’s son gets the whitewash. This also occurred about a month after the USS Liberty incident in the Med.

    Am I the only one that notes that the man is named after the first murderer?

  66. 66
    christine says:

    Obama’s lapel pin: $10.
    McCain’s lapel pin: (2) $150., $200

    Obama’s Embroidered Fleece Blanket $30.
    McCain Embroidered Fleece Blanket $75.

  67. 67
    Polly Wonka says:

    I hope they will sell a makeup kit stencilled with McCain’s favorite “C” word for his wife.

  68. 68
    PeterJ says:

    I hope they will sell a makeup kit stencilled with McCain’s favorite “C” word for his wife.

    That would be

    Yes
    Standing into Danger
    No
    Keep Clear

  69. 69
    Armando says:

    “I christen thee The Flying WASP.”

    Ah yes, but Obama is the elitist? This does give me a wonderful idea though; I’m gonna take my FREE MoveOn.org Obama 08 sticker and put it on my two person kayak.

    I wonder what Johnny ‘Stray Talk Express”, Judge & Mrs. Smails will think of that?

  70. 70
    Stop Depleted Uranium says:

    I just got an 800 dollar hearing aid from the store… it comes without a battery compartment to easily keep those pesky facts out.
    I love it and ordered several more for my family and friends.

  71. 71
    madhaus says:

    John, thanks for getting my comment some wider readership. I did follow it up with a full-on diary (article) a couple of days later, but sometimes less is more.

    Also check out this ridiculous puff-piece press release from McCain Campaignbots, giving Johnny the back-pat for selling the pins at such a markup while reminding everyone of his Navy days. Wonder how many McPapers ran it as is?

  72. 72
    madhaus says:

    Ok, here’s a link to another really funny take on the nautical pin — it’s bloody WINDOWS.

Trackbacks & Pingbacks

  1. […] Posted in Election, GOP at 7:15 pm by LeisureGuy From Balloon Juice, this funny note. McCain’s site sells various accessories (e.g., golfing equipment), along with this nautical lapel pin: […]

  2. […] John Cole translates the flags that spell out McCain’s initials to get the nautical meaning: […]

  3. […] Later update: From the comment thread at DKos, via John Cole.  You just can’t make this stuff up. […]

  4. […] Posted by Greg on June 11, 2008 Doesn’t the McCain campaign screen this stuff? […]

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