The Romney Post-Mortems

And with the demise of Mitt Romney come the inevitable few months worth of “What went wrong?” columns rehashing the new conventional wisdom about why Mitt lost. Howard Fineman:

I have covered a lot of presidential campaigns, and I can’t think of one that so lost its way-so expensively-as that of the former governor of Massachusetts. A board room and business favorite, a man with a Midas managerial touch, he was widely admired and even beloved. But he was a Republican of an old moderate school-that of his own father-and, like George W. Bush, Romney the Younger decided that he had to jettison all that he was to become something that he was not.

The NY Times:

Yet Mr. Romney’s advisers acknowledged Thursday an array of tactical missteps and miscalculations. Perhaps most significantly, they conceded that they had failed to overcome doubts about Mr. Romney’s authenticity as they sought to position him as the most electable conservative in the race, a jarring contrast to his more moderate record as governor of Massachusetts. And during the January nominating contests, as his opponents attacked his shifting on issues, polls showed his favorability ratings plummeting.

Mr. Romney spent more than $35 million of his own money trying to get himself elected, but his campaign faced challenges from the start, some from obstacles beyond his control.

Pretending to be something he is not would be one of those chief obstacles. It really is that simple. I constantly trash the folks at Red State for their incessant Bush boosterism (which on many days is so over-the-top it makes Hugh Hewitt blush), but one thing they got right and stated early and often was their belief that Romney was a complete fraud. It was Erick who came up with resurrected the phrase Multiple-Choice Mitt. Any candidate who can not sell themselves to these guys is in for a LONG campaign, and Romney’s make-over was just so phony that he couldn’t fool our moronic electorate (I’m a Democrat now, which means I don’t have to pretend the people are rugged and smart anymore). Probably fitting to let Dan McLaughlin from Red State have the last word:

I may expand on this later…I am sympathetic to the people who bought into the idea of the Romney campaign but, as happened to those of us who backed Rudy or Fred, the time has come to accept that the reality of the campaign was never what it was cracked up to be. In Mitt’s case, he just wasn’t the champion of conservative principles and enforcer of conservative orthodoxy he played on the trail…

A hamburger is a delicious and popular meal. A grilled chicken sandwich is nutritious and reasonably tasty. You can sell a hamburger, and you can sell a grilled chicken sandwich; both have their virtues. But as anyone with a marketing background could have told you, you can’t get people to buy a grilled chicken sandwich by convincing them that it is a hamburger.

See you in 2011, Mittens.






90 replies
  1. 1
    Jen says:

    I’d just like to voice my opinion that people wouldn’t have liked Mitt no matter what he was sold as. He’s not appealing as a moderate governor any more than his phony orthodox conservative package.
    To use RS’ atrocious metaphor, he is more like a McFish Filet.

  2. 2
    Jamey says:

    Uh, no. Teddy Kennedy’s campaign folks came up with Multiple Choice Mitt, during the (IIRC) 1994 Mass Senatorial campaign .
    Erick couldn’t come up with yesterday’s dinner, even with a gallon of ipecac.

  3. 3
    Jamey says:

    Hamburger, chicken, whatever. I’m a vegetario-fascist.

  4. 4
    4tehlulz says:

    a man with a Midas managerial touch

    The Commonwealth of Massachusetts respectfully disagrees with that assessment, Howard.

  5. 5
    4tehlulz says:

    Also,

    he was widely admired and even beloved.

    Other than by Hugh Hewitt and other irrelevant personalities, who was he beloved by? Seriously, what was Fineman smoking when he wrote this crap?

  6. 6
    dslak says:

    I can’t believe people get paid to write the kind of crap Fineman does on things like this, especially when he’s egregiously wrong.

    like George W. Bush, Romney the Younger decided that he had to jettison all that he was to become something that he was not

    When the hell did Dubya become something he wasn’t? He’s always been a nepotistic, authoritarian reactionary masquerading as a moderate whom everybody loves. The fact that Fineman gets paid to do political analysis, yet can’t see obvious things like that . . . Well, sometimes I wish I didn’t have any self-respect, because I could be making some serious money.

  7. 7
    smedly says:

    I’m a vegetario-fascist.

    Hahaha! That’s rich. Nothing further. Over and out.

  8. 8
    4tehlulz says:

    When the hell did Dubya become something he wasn’t?

    Does “Compassionate Conservative” ring a bell? Especially the “Compassionate” part.

  9. 9
    Jake says:

    Perhaps most significantly, they conceded that they had failed to overcome doubts about Mr. Romney’s authenticity

    Bwahaha! [Gasp] Wait. You mean telling a flagrant lie on Monday [snicker] and spending the rest of the week explaining how it isn’t really a lie if you turn your head to the right and squint didn’t work.

    BwahahAHAHAH!!

  10. 10
    Stooleo says:

    Besides the rank opportunism and chameleon like stands on policy, its the Mormonism. Christians won’t vote for a non Christian. They view Mormonism as kind of a cult, which it kind of is (not that there is anything wrong with that).

  11. 11
    dslak says:

    Does “Compassionate Conservative” ring a bell? Especially the “Compassionate” part.

    Nobody even knows what the hell that even means. That’s why he was able to milk it for all it was worth. Chances are, even he still believes that’s what he is.

  12. 12
    dslak says:

    Speaking of post-mortems, with their darling St. McCain now lined up, the media are now preparing to write the obituary for the Dems.

  13. 13
    Caidence (fmr. Chris) says:

    What went wrong?

    ooh! ooh! I know! I know! pick me!

    Romney was a winner in a party of losers?

    — “I ran a business like a CEO” “Yeah but you hedge like one”
    — “I’ll be pro life” “You have to be pro life yesterday and last year, too”
    — “I’m a Christian” “You’re not any kind of Christian I’ve been forced to accept yet”
    — “I have executive experience” “But In LIEberal Massachusetts!”

    He just lost earlier than the others because the party is self-cannibalizing. They need to get the pain over with as quickly as possible.

  14. 14
    sparky says:

    Mittens makes me think about GWB, another false front, who, in contrast, did manage to bamboozle enough of the people enough of the time. What’s the reason for the different outcomes? Was it Rove? Or was it that if, as some have suggested, he’s a narcissist or a sociopath, he’s the better actor? Or is that Romney was too smart to actually believe in his own side’s crapola and consequently couldn’t carry it off?

  15. 15
    Fe E says:

    Well, sometimes I wish I didn’t have any self-respect, because I could be making some serious money.

    I’ve thought that myself a time or two, too bad there are enough shallow mercenary whores to fill that niche in out absence.

  16. 16
    JGabriel says:

    Howard Fineman:

    I have covered a lot of presidential campaigns, and I can’t think of one that so lost its way – so expensively – as that of the former governor of Massachusetts.

    Except for that other campaign this season by Giuliani – $50 million for *one* delegate.

    At least Mitt got each of his delegates for under $2 million.

  17. 17
    Wilfred says:

    They view Mormonism as kind of a cult, which it kind of is

    But ‘conservatism’, at least that expressed by redState et al., really is a cult – a set of beliefs (ideological and at times religious)that mainstream society considers to be out of the ordinary and, in their case, not really part of the dominant ideology of the country. That’s why they can’t get anyone elected at a national level and why their preferred candidates got shot down so quickly. Cults can’t stand one another.

  18. 18
    TheFountainHead says:

    —“I ran a business like a CEO” “Yeah but you hedge like one”—“I’ll be pro life” “You have to be pro life yesterday and last year, too”—“I’m a Christian” “You’re not any kind of Christian I’ve been forced to accept yet”—“I have executive experience” “But In LIEberal Massachusetts!”

    You sir, win teh intarwebs.

  19. 19
    Jen says:

    dslak et al., I have a real question about the link you posted. Howard Dean say:

    “I think we’re going to have a nominee by middle of March or April.” DNC Chairman Howard Dean said. “But if we don’t, then we’re gonna have to get the candidates together and make some kind of arrangement, because I don’t think we can afford to have a brokered convention. That would not be good news for either party.”

    How are we going to have a nominee by middle of March or April? Isn’t it impossible for either of them to get enough delegates, and pretty much impossible that one would concede the nomination to the other? I don’t want a drawn-out affair either, but I can’t figure how this is going to happen. Someone who knows more what they’re talking about tell me.

    BTW, I have a confession. The husband magicked “Yes We Can” onto my iPod for me via some genius website. It is a little bit cheesy, I know, but I listened to it about 10 times doing the laundry and dishes and cleaning last night. It really helps. Yes..we…can…fold…these..clothes. It’s motivating.

  20. 20
    dslak says:

    With Mitt out, assuming there’s a second edition of his Romney tome, I have a fitting title: A Mormon in the White House? No, I Guess not.

  21. 21
    dslak says:

    How are we going to have a nominee by middle of March or April?

    We’re not. A few more states are going to have to hold primaries, and maybe something can be worked out with the superdelegates. I wouldn’t expect anything as early as Dean does, but he’s obviously on closer terms with many of the superdelegates than I am.

  22. 22
    Caidence (fmr. Chris) says:

    “I ran a business like a CEO” “Yeah but you hedge like one”
    “I’ll be pro life” “You have to be pro life yesterday and last year, too”
    “I’m a Christian” “You’re not any kind of Christian I’ve been forced to accept yet”
    “I have executive experience” “But In LIEberal Massachusetts!”

    damn it this preview window lies to me every time.

    You sir, win teh intarwebs.

    Is that the one with all the sexy 19 year-olds looking to hook up NSA justclickhere, or the one with old pictures of Albert Gore’s family, stochastically embedded with launch codes for all the ICBMs in active employment? Because I could use a sexy 19 year-old. Or 4.

    Or a launch code. Either way, I win.

  23. 23
    myiq2xu says:

    Ironically, neither Barry Goldwater nor Ronald Reagan could live up the the batshit crazy standards of today’s conservatives.

  24. 24
    Chinn Romney says:

    Speaking on behalf of the Family I’d like to say we’re glad it’s over. The first order of business is mending fences with our Landscaper. The Estate has gone to seed, literally and figuratively, since we switched to the more expensive, less gifted ‘Merican Joe Mow and Blow’. Those slacker HS kids they employ just aren’t up to the task.

  25. 25
    TheFountainHead says:

    Ironically, neither Barry Goldwater nor Ronald Reagan could live up the the batshit crazy standards of today’s conservatives.

    I’m beginning to wonder if Atilla the Hun would be an acceptable candidate for these fascists. I remember reading somewhere that the Hun was really good to his armies, so that sure wouldn’t fly…

  26. 26
    ThymeZone says:

    Nobody even knows what the hell that even means. That’s why he was able to milk it for all it was worth. Chances are, even he still believes that’s what he is.

    Exactly. He’s the kind of guy who probably thinks that if he tears up at a story about war, then he’s compassionate, and thinks that torture is justified.

    Criminal profilers know this mindset, it’s called sociopathy.

  27. 27

    Jen Says:

    How are we going to have a nominee by middle of March or April? Isn’t it impossible for either of them to get enough delegates, and pretty much impossible that one would concede the nomination to the other? I don’t want a drawn-out affair either, but I can’t figure how this is going to happen. Someone who knows more what they’re talking about tell me.

    February 8th, 2008 at 10:28 am

    I have no idea what I’m talking about but it isn’t unreasonable to think Obama may be able to build up a real head of steam the rest of February and into March as Hillary has no more California’s or New York’s in her bag of tricks. A string of wins by Obama may dry up funding needed by Team Hillary and leave her in the dust.

    At least that’s what I’m hoping will happen.

  28. 28
    ThymeZone says:

    Speaking on behalf of the Family I’d like to say we’re glad it’s over. The first order of business is mending fences with our Landscaper. The Estate has gone to seed, literally and figuratively, since we switched to the more expensive, less gifted ‘Merican Joe Mow and Blow’. Those slacker HS kids they employ just aren’t up to the task.

    Satire alert! This is some fine, fine work … whoever you are. Send more please.

  29. 29
    Ned Raggett says:

    Here’s my favorite post-mortem so far courtesy of David Frum, ie “I came up with the phrase ‘axis of evil’ and you suckers believed it!”:

    Mr. Romney was made of very different stuff. He could enthrall a roomful of CEOs and economists with his mastery of economic details. Watching him absorb information was like watching an ultra-powerful wet vac deal with a garage spill. SHLOOOOOP –in it goes!

    A vision.

  30. 30

    The problem with Mitt Romney is that he was just as phony a conservative as George Bush, but he wasn’t stupid enough for people to give him a pass for it.

    I mean, it’s one thing for the leader to be stupid and for his base to be stupid. Some smart people will go along with that if they think it’s in their interest (say, waving gay marriage around while they fuck crackerstan economically). But it’s quite another thing when even the ignorant base realizes this guy thinks they’re stupid, stupid enough to believe he’d repudiate his entire record and embrace their stupidity.

    I mean, even stupid people have their self respect.
    .

  31. 31
    ThymeZone says:

    it isn’t unreasonable to think Obama may be able to build up a real head of steam the rest of February and into March as Hillary has no more California’s or New York’s in her bag of tricks. A string of wins by Obama may dry up funding needed by Team Hillary and leave her in the dust.

    Sounds good to me. As long as we don’t end up with 1968-style convention melee, I like this contest and I think it’s good for the party. It’s a struggle between the power establishment and the grassroots, it seems to me. And I am on the side of the grassroots.

    I think that Obama is exactly what the Democratic party needs right now … and the country too.

    I really hope that the GOP buys totally into the absurd “a vote for the Democrat is a vote for Al Qaeda” campaign theme and plays it to the hilt, too. I think it makes Obama look better and better by comparison. Maybe McCain will choose Hillary as his running mate? They seem to like each other.

  32. 32
    ThymeZone says:

    SHLOOOOOP —in it goes!

    That could be the central theme of the GOP this year.

    Just bend over, America, and SCHLOOOOOP – in it goes!

    Eight more years of Republican rule, anyone?

    BWAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHHA

  33. 33
    TR says:

    Scarborough this morning was insisting that if McCain campaigns on a promise to stay in Iraq and the Democrats promise to get out, it’ll lead to a massive Republican victory. No, seriously. He wants McCain to run aggressively on extending the war 3/4 of the voters want ended.

    He was calling in from Florida, so I couldn’t tell if he was high or if he was just drunk.

  34. 34
    TheFountainHead says:

    Right now I can watch McCain’s roundtable on International Security or I can watch the live feed of the crew of Atlantis scan the bottom of the shuttle for possible damage–without commentary. Guess which one I find more intriguing?

  35. 35
    sparky says:

    the hangover from the 90s and GWB is just starting to show up, so, maybe TZ is right: the Rs will run into a wall, and it will be a 1932-style realignment election. wouldn’t that be interesting? Mistah Rove, he could go down as the architect of the demise of his own party. bwahahaaha. ha.

    oh yeah, and about time too.

  36. 36
    Fe E says:

    Scarborough this morning was insisting that if McCain campaigns on a promise to stay in Iraq and the Democrats promise to get out, it’ll lead to a massive Republican victory. No, seriously. He wants McCain to run aggressively on extending the war 3/4 of the voters want ended.

    Yeah, I caught that too, sometimes just when you think Joe doesn’t completely have his hed up his ass, well, he demonstrates how wrong you are.

    I think Glenn Greenwald addressed this pretty damn well yesterday, but Joe and and Pat Buchanan lost their collective shit and hammered on hapless Shuster, fluffy Mika and that completely useless blow-dried turd that is WIllie Geist.

  37. 37
    TR says:

    Joe and and Pat Buchanan lost their collective shit and hammered on hapless Shuster, fluffy Mika and that completely useless blow-dried turd that is WIllie Geist.

    Shuster let himself get shouted down by Scarborough — “this is my show! don’t talk over me!” — but in general, he and Mika have done some good work pushing back against Joe’s inanity.

    The real surprise today was Tucker Carlson, pointing out that the conservatives who are leading the charge against McCain are doing it because they’re selfish and they make money off running the show. Surprised to see him state it so plainly.

  38. 38
    Willem van Oranje says:

    It was Erick who came up with the term Multiple-Choice Mitt

    Ehm, no. It was Ted Kennedy

  39. 39
    abiodun says:

    I think you are right-they(Limbaugh and co) will all assume the fetal position and vote for McCain and the 100-year war!

  40. 40
    ThymeZone says:

    just when you think Joe doesn’t completely have his hed up his ass, well, he demonstrates how wrong you are.

    True. It makes me think that he actually believes that GOP bullshit after all, he wasn’t just parroting it before. And that is … sad.

    Laura Ingraham hit on this yesterday, too. (If you really want a perfect, collectible example of the smarmiest right wing horseshit ever, try to get the video of her introducing Romney). According to her, smaller government and victory in warrenterra just win. They just win, baby!

    That’s why we have a smaller and smaller government and total victory in the warrenterra today, people!

    Er, or something. Just make the tax cuts permanent and get that DOMA amendment passed!

  41. 41
    curtadams says:

    Scarborough was saying campaigning on Iraq was a winner? You sure he wasn’t being sarcastic? He was the guy who said about McCain’s proposals “less jobs and more war: that’s a platform we can all get behind” to uproarious laughter from the MSNBC primary crew.

  42. 42
    TheFountainHead says:

    The real surprise today was Tucker Carlson, pointing out that the conservatives who are leading the charge against McCain are doing it because they’re selfish and they make money off running the show. Surprised to see him state it so plainly.

    I have to say, as someone who used to loathe this man in every sense of the word, Tucker Carlson has come a long way towards being someone whose thoughts I might allow to carry weight, especially since his Crossfire days. I mean, no one gloated and laughed harder than I when Jon Stewart laid him out for a fraud, but after seeing Tucker’s show a few times (accidents) and seeing him on Meet the Press, I have to respect the amount he’s grown. I don’t agree with him on anything, but he’s a far cry from the douchebag he used to be.

  43. 43
    Cain says:

    One thing you can credit McCain for is that he has at least one of his kids deploying to Iraq so you know that he’s going to try to win Iraq as competently as he can.

    cain

  44. 44
    Fe E says:

    Scarborough was saying campaigning on Iraq was a winner? You sure he wasn’t being sarcastic?

    No, he was being completely serious. That’s why just when you think he might have seen the light, he goes bonkers and runs home to his ideological mama. He was trumpeting that with Iraq being all flowers and candy after the surge, and Iran and N. Korea non-nuclear that Bush had triumphed over the “Axis of Evil.” As long as the Republicans ran on that premise a crushing, epic GOP victory was all but assured.

    At that point I had to flip over to the History Channel and watch a bit about the resurgence of Maritime piracy.

  45. 45
    Fe E says:

    Oh yeah, so everybody is in agreement that Willie Geist is a completely useless blow-dried turd, correct?

  46. 46
    Caidence (fmr. Chris) says:

    Mistah Rove, he could go down as the architect of the demise of his own party.

    I think people don’t realize that Rove sees himself above affiliation. He only joined the Republicans because he wanted to win. He spent his entire life beating up Democrats in red states (jesus, that hard!).

    And when he got to the top and had all the political leverage and nowhere higher to go, he started using the cheat codes: he started expending Republican credit for reasoned conservative government to push for Bush and Cheney’s pet authoritarian government.

    Why? Because he could.

    Rove isn’t a Republican. He’s a neurotic bully.

    Shorter Rove: mustWINmustWINmustWINmustWIN
    mustWINmustWINmustWINmustWINmustWINmustWIN
    mustWINmustWINmustWINmustWINmustWINmustWIN
    mustWINmustWINmustWINmustWINmustWINmustWINaaauuuugghhgh

  47. 47
    Dennis - SGMM says:

    Oh yeah, so everybody is in agreement that Willie Geist is a completely useless blow-dried turd, correct?

    “Aye”

  48. 48
    Jake says:

    That could be the central theme of the GOP this year.

    Just bend over, America, and SCHLOOOOOP – in it goes!

    Dear Sir,
    While very witty, the above quoted post implies the GOP would be considerate enough to use lube. It is therefore, on its face, factually erroneous.

  49. 49
    Caidence (fmr. Chris) says:

    Yeah, I caught that too, sometimes just when you think Joe doesn’t completely have his head up his ass, well, he demonstrates how wrong you are.

    The real surprise today was Tucker Carlson, pointing out that the conservatives

    Just when you think Tucker Carlson has his head completely up his ass, well, he demonstrates how wrong you are.

    (Yeah, I mean that. From time to time the planets align and his psychosis lifts)

  50. 50
    Jen says:

    I have no idea what I’m talking about but it isn’t unreasonable to think Obama may be able to build up a real head of steam the rest of February and into March as Hillary has no more California’s or New York’s in her bag of tricks. A string of wins by Obama may dry up funding needed by Team Hillary and leave her in the dust.

    At least that’s what I’m hoping will happen.

    I’m hoping, too, I guess I just thought it very unlikely that he would really explode on her. He’s going to do well in the February ones, but Texas and Ohio are March 4 and I expect those to favor her somewhat and keep the race close. But, I like thinking about him running away with the primary, that’s for sure.

  51. 51
    Jen says:

    Plus, doesn’t it seem really unlikely that Hillary would concede before exhausting every penny and ounce of energy at her disposal? She sure did start agitating for the FL and MI delegates early. But maybe it’s based more around winning by converting superdelegates rather than having enough lead for her to concede. This whole primary process to me is hard to understand, and I haven’t really tried that hard.

  52. 52
    TenguPhule says:

    One thing you can credit McCain for is that he has at least one of his kids deploying to Iraq so you know that he’s going to try to win Iraq as competently sneak the kid out as fast as he can.

    The McCoward plan for Iraq is Iraq Forever, Bitches!

  53. 53
    ThymeZone says:

    This whole primary process to me is hard to understand, and I haven’t really tried that hard.

    That’s okay, the party didn’t try that hard either.

    Their goal was to try to insulate the process from too much democracy and leave the door open for the smoke filled room.

    How’s that for a mixed metaphor? See, with the door open for the smoke-filled room, some fresh air will get in and ….

    Ah, never mind. Nobody actually understands it.

  54. 54
    Jen says:

    AP report on CPAC (not as good as Sadly,No report on CPAC)

    Bush spoke to a boisterous crowd shortly after 7 a.m. EST. The ballroom erupted in cheers when someone shouted “Are there conservatives in the house?” When the president walked on stage, they clapped and chanted “Four more years! Four more years!”

    What I wanna know is, where do these ass clowns get off calling *us* defeatist? Their voters do them the favor of picking the only R candidate who actually has Cheney’s chance in heaven of winning this thing, and they boo him. A man with a 28% approval rating, on the other hand, and SPROING.

    Am I showing my age with the Wayne’s World reference? Haven’t seen it much around snarkdom.

  55. 55
    Stooleo says:

    Hey, look who lost his super delegate status.

    I love that the call it the Zell Miller rule. BTW where the hell is Zell.

  56. 56
    The Other Steve says:

    Less Jobs, More War!

    Now that’s a bumper sticker!

  57. 57
    NonyNony says:

    Grand Moff Texan Says:

    The problem with Mitt Romney is that he was just as phony a conservative as George Bush, but he wasn’t stupid enough for people to give him a pass for it.

    Maybe. But I still think the “Taxachusetts” thing did him in. I think Mitt could have been just as phoney AND not as dumb as W AND Mormon and pulled it off IF he’d been the governor somewhere other than hated “Taxachusetts”.

    I mean, imagine Mitt as the governor of some suitably Red state like Texas where he bought his way into the governor’s office. Or even some purplish Midwestern state like Michigan. It would have worked in his favor in two ways – he wouldn’t have had to move so far away from Republican Orthodoxy to get elected in the first place AND he would have been from a state that didn’t immediately cause the “Republican lizard-brain” to immediately superimpose images of John Kerry or Ted Kennedy over Mitten’s Ken-doll-like generic white-guy features.

    Mitt as governor of Michigan or even Utah could have pulled it off – even with the other negatives. Mitt as governor of “Taxachusetts” wasn’t going to cut it.

  58. 58
    rawshark says:

    and SPROING.

    Am I showing my age with the Wayne’s World reference?

    You mean ‘shwiiing’ right?

  59. 59
    srv says:

    So is there enough room in the car for the dog during the drive back home?

  60. 60
    Jen says:

    Oh, boy. I’m showing my age even more because I am so old I have FORGOTTEN the Wayne’s World references.

    Sheesh.

  61. 61
    dslak says:

    You mean ‘shwiiing’ right?

    It is most certainly “SHWING!” not “SPROING.”

  62. 62
    Xenos says:

    Mitt built quite a mansion in Belmont, and had a enormous Mormon temple built as a monument to his ego. He was not going to start that whole damn process over again in a more tacky state.

  63. 63
    Sstarr says:

    I think that Wonkette has the final word on Mitt Romney:

    He was a Mormon. Then he fixed the Olympics and liberal Massachusetts. Then he was the Republican nominee for nothing. Always and forever, he was the biggest liar and panderer in American history, but he meant well. The point is: Ronald Reagan. Ronald Reagan, Ronald Reagan, Reagan Reagan Ronald. SIZE DOES MATTER.

    Poor Mitt. Mitt is a loser. And he lost to Walnuts. Now we may all lose to Walnuts.

  64. 64
    Tsulagi says:

    Scarborough this morning was insisting that if McCain campaigns on a promise to stay in Iraq and the Democrats promise to get out, it’ll lead to a massive Republican victory. No, seriously. He wants McCain to run aggressively on extending the war 3/4 of the voters want ended.

    If Dems let McCain frame Iraq and get led around by the nose on the defensive as they were during the Petraeus hearings, then they’re just too stupid and spineless to win.

    They should take McCain’s 100-year Iraq babysitting mission pledge and turn it into a George Allen Macaca moment. Or Kerry’s “I voted for it before I voted against it.” Turn it into a club and beat him with, then beat him with it, then beat him with it some more. When he’s prone, bloodied, and not moving, tap him two more times.

    I work with some Republicans and have some in my family. While they all would like something that could be called a win, 100 years with success measured as a lower burn rate through service members and civilians isn’t it. Not to mention the debt pile from it.

  65. 65
    Jen says:

    Yeah, yeah, Schwing, shwing, shwiing. Sorry. No penis, forgot what sound they make.

  66. 66
    Ed Drone says:

    Less Jobs, More War!

    But it isn’t fewer jobs! It’s a full-employment plan, if you look at it right. As I put it in a song:

    “Now, here at home, the policies are tilted toward the rich,
    Big tax cuts and deficits, the good old bait and switch!
    Our leader loves the rich, and puts the dollars in their fist,
    But for the poor, there’s still the war, so they can just enlist!”

    I also predicted Bush’s plan to end the war:

    “Stay the course,” he told us, but wouldn’t show his map;
    He wants complacent citizens to go back to their nap.
    To end the war in Iraq, he’s got a cunning plan –
    He’ll pull the troops out one fine day – and send them to Iran!

    The tune, by the way, is “Yellow Rose of Texas.” and the chorus goes:

    It’s time to turn the boat around, that’s what the people say.
    The course our leader’s setting is exactly the wrong way.
    The compass reads “disaster,” he’s run us hard aground,
    It’s time to fire the skipper, and then turn the boat around.

    Ed

  67. 67
    rawshark says:

    Jen Says:

    Oh, boy. I’m showing my age even more because I am so old I have FORGOTTEN the Wayne’s World references.

    Sheesh.

    Its Ok. Just remember, don’t taunt Happy Fun Ball.

  68. 68
    Haltelcere says:

    even stupid people have their self respect.

    I want that saying on a T-shirt.

  69. 69
    ThymeZone says:

    It is most certainly “SHWING!” not “SPROING.”

    Right. SPROING is getting caught in a zipper, and it is followed by OWW FUCK OH GODDAMIT SHIT

    SPROING can also be a reaction of a cop sitting in a restroom stall in a cold, northern city all weekend, shortly after he starts to wonder how his career went off the track and instead of fighting crime, he is getting paid to be the sex police and scare away queers.

  70. 70
    Davebo says:

    More of the Walton’s eat their young

    You think McCain will fight a war? You’re so stupid. McCain’s goal is to give Democrats everything they want while leaving Republicans to take the blame. McCain will reach across the aisle and lose the war. McCain will reach across the aisle to appoint leftist judges. McCain will reach across the aisle to raise taxes. McCain will reach across the aisle to impose HillaryCare. McCain will reach across the aisle at any time necessary to screw Conservatives.

    I WILL NOT VOTE FOR JOHN McCAIN. McCain cannot win anyway, but to be sure, I have joined the growing cadre of suicide voters: I will vote for the Clintons over McCain.

    Some of you pathetic, spineless CINOs are bowing to fear and caving to threats and supporting McCain. SHAME ON YOUR SORRY ASSES.

    Let Bill and Hillary destroy the country and let Democrats take the rap for it. WHEN AMERICANS ARE SICK AND TIRED OF DEMOCRAT FASCISM, ONLY THEN WILL REPUBLICANS HAVE ANOTHER CHANCE TO WIN.

    If McCain wins, he will gurantee a Democrat majority for DECADES if not a CENTURY to come.

    RIP GOP.

  71. 71
    John S. says:

    Line up now for the dream ticket, folks:

    Oligarchy 2008

    One America – Two families – In control – FOREVER.

    As always, voters get what they deserve. Enjoy.

  72. 72
    ThymeZone says:

    Wow, off topic but … anyone hearing that Bill Clinton interview today?

    “I won’t interfere with a strong cabinet or vice president.”

    You gotta hear this interview, it’s appearing on MSNBC tv this morning. Bill sounds like he got told to shut up … and is trying to comply.

    I think the SS Clinton is taking on water.

  73. 73
    Dennis - SGMM says:

    Here are a couple of examples from McCain’s CPAC Speech just to show you what kind of pretzel logic St. John will be exercising during the campaign:

    …and defended my opposition to the prescription drug benefit bill that saddled Americans with yet another hugely expensive entitlement program…

    …They will offer a big government solution to health care insurance coverage.

    I intend to address the problem with free market solutions and with respect for the freedom of individuals to make important choices for themselves…

    Isn’t the prescription drug benefit, which McCain coyly forgets to mention was a Bush initiative passed by a Republican congress, hugely expensive because it was free market solution? And what in the world leads the dotard to believe that the same free market that has for thirty years led to costs that increase at multiples of inflation while leaving millions uninsured will suddenly and magically provide health care to all without breaking the bank?

    On another note, I read the text of the whole speech through (so that you don’t have to) a couple of times and McCain did not utter the words “balanced budget,” “deficit spending” or even “deficit” once. This in front of a group calling itself the Conservative Political Action Conference. Apparently, fiscal conservatism is now officially dead to them.

  74. 74
    NonyNony says:

    Let Bill and Hillary destroy the country and let Democrats take the rap for it. WHEN AMERICANS ARE SICK AND TIRED OF DEMOCRAT FASCISM, ONLY THEN WILL REPUBLICANS HAVE ANOTHER CHANCE TO WIN.

    Jeez – someone’s been listening a bit too much to Limbaugh.

    Or maybe to Nader, but with the Democrats and the Republicans reversed…

  75. 75
    ThymeZone says:

    Isn’t the prescription drug benefit, which McCain coyly forgets to mention was a Bush initiative passed by a Republican congress, hugely expensive because it was free market solution?

    Yes.

    SATSQ vol. 31 ch. 165

  76. 76
    Helena Montana says:

    he was widely admired and even beloved.

    Beloved? BELOVED? By whom? Name me one person (outside of his unfortunate family) who loved that slimy, flip-flopping weasel? “What’s your position, Mr. Romney?” “Um, what do you want it to be?”

  77. 77
    ThymeZone says:

    Jeez – someone’s been listening a bit too much to Limbaugh.

    And Coulter. Heard her make the ‘crossover’ speech today on cable tv.

    I must say, I always knew these people were batshit crazy, but this meltdown far exceeds my own expectations.

    Damn, this is some fun.

  78. 78
    NonyNony says:

    Isn’t the prescription drug benefit, which McCain coyly forgets to mention was a Bush initiative passed by a Republican congress, hugely expensive because it was free market solution?

    The words “free market” also no longer has any meaning in political circles, much like the words “conservative”.

    Seriously – if the handout to the drug companies known as Medicare Part D can really be called a “free market” solution – a solution where the drug companies set prices with no negotiation by anyone – then the words are devoid of meaning. Or they mean something like “giant companies get what they want, screw everyone else.”

    Apparently, fiscal conservatism is now officially dead to them.

    More words with no political meaning anymore. “Fiscal conservatism” means “hand me the credit card and we’ll just make Junior pay for it”. Fiscal conservatism and fiscal responsibility used to be synonymous, but now they’re opposites. It’s no surprise to me that he wouldn’t want to bring it up in front of CPAC.

  79. 79
    Tony J says:

    I’m beginning to wonder if Atilla the Hun would be an acceptable candidate for these fascists.

    Nah. Rumour has it he was a bit too dark of complexion for the average Whitey-Righty to feel altogether comfortable about his stance on immigration.

  80. 80
    Dennis - SGMM says:

    Or they mean something like “giant companies get what they want, screw everyone else.”

    Bingo!

  81. 81
    dslak says:

    “I won’t interfere with a strong cabinet or vice president.”

    So, as long as the people in those positions are capable of standing up to Bill, we don’t have to worry about him having too much power relative to his office?

  82. 82
    ThymeZone says:

    beginning to wonder if Atilla the Hun would be an acceptable candida

    To quote a great Americannette yesterday, what has he done for conservatives lately?

  83. 83
    Wilfred says:

    I have joined the growing cadre of suicide voters: I will vote for the Clintons over McCain.

    Suicide voter! Now that’s funny – play it to Paperback Writer.

  84. 84
    John S. says:

    Suicide voter! Now that’s funny – play it to Paperback Writer.

    It’s the dirty story of a dirty man
    And his second wife doesn’t understand.
    His daughter was rumored to be a black love child,
    It’s a dirty lie but I want to be a suicide voter,
    Suicide voter!

    He has a thousand promises, give or take a few,
    He’ll be making more in a week or two.
    He can be less liberal if you hate that style,
    He can change it round and I want to be a suicide voter,
    Suicide voter!

  85. 85
    Wilfred says:

    It’s the dirty story of a dirty man
    And his second wife doesn’t understand

    Too funny, John. I’ll have this in my head the rest of the day

    One question – on Fox will they be Homicide Voters?

  86. 86
    Caidence (fmr. Chris) says:

    Wow, off topic but … anyone hearing that Bill Clinton interview today?

    “I won’t interfere with a strong cabinet or vice president.”

    Am I the only one that is angered by this?

    WHO TEH FUCK is HE to say he’s “not going to interfere”? If Hillary wins, Bill is a motherfucking HOUSEMAKER. He doesn’t even get the chance to interfere. He gets to kneel and suck the Veep’s dick clit (who am I kidding) and like it.

    What the hell is wrong with these people?? Bill is DONE! He has NO Constitutional role any more.

    Now I know why I’m pushing for Obama. Mostly to get these people the fuck away from office. They have no respect for it.

    /GAHH!

  87. 87
    John S. says:

    One question – on Fox will they be Homicide Voters?

    Of course! That will be on the Wal-Mart version of the album.

    What the hell is wrong with these people?? Bill is DONE! He has NO Constitutional role any more.

    The ruling families in full-fledged oligarchies have no sense of this.

    Hence why I am pushing for Obama as well.

  88. 88
    ThymeZone says:

    Bill is a motherfucking HOUSEMAKER

    Great opportunity for the Food Network. “Thirty minute meals with Bill.” Or, “Iron Chef With Bill Clinton.”

    Okay, “Bill Goes Italian.”

    Get his agent on the phone ….

  89. 89
  90. 90
    HeartlandLiberal says:

    Mitt Romney is a political whore who would sell his soul and his position to the highest bidder, as long as it would get him elected.

    I am sure that had nothing to do with his implosion. Right?

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