Dear Baby Jesus,
I can not survive an election that starts with official debates 18 months before the general election. If there is anything you can do to stop this, it would be much appreciated. Perhaps if you start out small, with power outages, we will be able to stop this nonsense before we have to unleash locusts.
I don’t know, but it is worth a try.
Thanks,
The Editors
Dug Jay
Obama may not make it to the first debate the way things are going for him lately. From today’s New York Times:
“In order to get a bigger yard for their new house on Chicago’s South Side in 2005, the Obamas got into what the senator now confesses was a ‘boneheaded’ real estate arrangement with a sleazy political dealmaker named Tony Rezko, who has been indicted on influence-peddling charges.”
MoDo rips him a new one with a long column about how his wife makes him seem small with her constant public comments making fun of him and his reputation.
Poopyman
You know, if no one watched, maybe they’d get the idea.
I know I’m doing my part.
Zifnab
If I go too long without political discourse, I get the shakes.
But really, I think this is a case of “OMG! I can’t wait till Bush is out of office!” syndrome sweeping the country. Maybe if we can have the debates sooner, we can have the next inauguration sooner too. Just bump the whole thing up a year. I’d be happy with that.
gus
MoDo can eat a dick. She should be in the gossip pages where her cut-rate psychoanalyzing belongs.
Blue Neponset
Good point Zifnab. I didn’t think about how lame duckier Dubya will look once we get a Presidential debate or two under our belt.
Dreggas
You know, I actually look at it as a good thing simply because with 8 candidates running it should help to quickly seperate the wheat from the Chaff. Of course given that the top 3 have been decided on (Clinton, Obama, Edwards) there’s not much left to be said but if it helps to solidify support behind one of the candidates then the others could (if it weren’t for their overwhelming ego’s) bow out and throw their support behind the front runner presenting a unified front.
Dreggas
O/T but question, why don’t you pray to adult Jesus or dead Jesus like everyone else?
Jimmmm
Dreggas clearly has not seen Talladega Nights.
Dreggas
heh if that wasn’t sarcasm then actually yes I have which is what prompted me to ask the question LOL :P
Zombie Santa Claus
What about her investigative reporting work on John Edwards’ haircuts? How will our nation survive withou reporting like that? Kudos to her for pulling the lid off that guy’s schtick!
Tsulagi
Exactly. There are plenty of people on both sides of the aisle thinking/wishing “Can’t we just put this idiot in the attic now and move up the calendar?” Bush fatigue.
The Other Steve
I like to think of baby jesus as one of those debate moderators. In an A-Team t-shirt, a Ralph Macchio headband carrying an Uzi.
Zombie Santa Claus
Jesus killed for your sins, moonbats.
Dreggas
kinda reminds me of the Mad TV skit where a terminator was sent back in time to protect jesus. Terminator keeps shooting Judas with a shotgun and Jesus keeps reviving him.
The Voice of Yahweh
Cole, you ignorant slut!
First, you cheerlead for war, then you get all pissy because the morons you guys put in charge are torturing people?
Suck it up, perfesser.
But I do sympathize with your predicament. You guys manage power outages without my help, but I’m setting up something with the bees. You’ll all be eating out of garbage cans by next Christmas, so don’t sweat the debates. By that time, Gingrich will be supreme leader.
One more thing, can’t one of you lazy fuckers shut up that bitch Dowd? My Son in a sidecar!
Rome Again
I hope those who are suffering from Bush fatigue consider that putting another Clinton in the oval office will create the same problem.
Bush/Clinton/Bush/Clinton? No thanks! Can we have someone new and not related to these two families please?
Bubblegum Tate
Dear six-pound, eight-ounce baby Jesus lying in your ghost manger, listening to Baby Einstein tapes,
Could you maybe tell all these assholes who claim to represent you to go take a long walk off a short pier? You’d really be doing the rest of the world a solid.
See you for booze and dominoes tomorrow night?
BT
demimondian
I think He did. At least, *my* Bible contains some verses about “ye hypocrites” and having “the temple a den of thieves.”
demimondian
How about a Kennedy, instead?
Rome Again
How about we just get rid of Nepotism altogether and just concentrate on intelligence and planning instead?
Enlightened Layperson
Might I suggest refusing to watch the debates, refusing to discuss potential candidates on the blog and generally refusing to participate until we at least approach the primaries. If we refuse to listen, maybe they’ll shut up.
Rome Again
I think they’ll yell louder because nobody is paying them any attention.
MNPundit
Bowers argues that it means people are energized and it’s a good thing when more people get involved in the process.
lard lad
Mercy! Them’s some juuuuuuuicy scandals!
And to think folks got so worked up over trifles like Watergate, the Gulf of Tonkin, Iran/Contra and Teapot Dome. Massive corruption and damnable lies are one thing… but allowing yourself to get ribbed by your wife? How can we support a wuss like that for President?
Think Obama could rally up GOP support by simply backhanding the bitch in the piehole the next time she talks smack?
mrmobi
This very extended campaign is the price we must pay for electing a true moron.
On the up side, John. You’ll get to hear lots of commentary from Al Sharpton and Jessie Jackson.
{Bill Murray voice} We’ve got that going for us, which is nice.
Dreggas
he’d also have to call her a nappy headed ho…
Don
That was Chevy Chase in Caddyshack, actually.
grumpy realist
Heck, Obama could boost his popularity 20 points by backhanding MoDo in the piehole. From both Dems and Repubs.
*sigh* Molly Ivins she ain’t. We miss you, Molly…..
(add declaimer that as a card-carrying feminist I realise that physical violence against women is a Real Problem and I’m being horribly nasty to MoDo, but goddamn, she epitomizes the worst of all catty spinster stereotypes.)
whatsleft
Nope – Bill Murray as the assistant greenskeeper when recounting the story of caddying for the Dalai Lama. What is “nice” is the total consciousness of the meaning of life he will receive at the point of death. This was the “tip” he got from the “Lamma”.
Krista
Well, you could have our system, where you don’t know when the hell the next election will be, and if you have a minority government, the odds of having an election less than a year after the last one are really quite high. There’s gotta be a happy medium — maybe have fixed elections every four years, but any media outlet that starts election coverage any sooner than 6 months before the election will have its license yanked. :)