I simply can not sleep. I am worried sick; all I can think about is how good it is going to feel if my boys win, and how bad it is going to feel if they lose, and I have been staring at the ceiling for four hours now.
I do not recall a time when I have been as emotionally fragile. I feel like I could break down over nothing right now.
Umm. Go Steelers.
The Disenfranchised Voter
LOL. This has got to be the most hilarious post on a blog ever.
MTmofo
I know the feeling. I’m a Seahawks fan. I’m not sure I want to be around people as I become either extremely elated or excruciatingly humiliated. I have been a Hawks fan since the team was formed. A guy from my hometown was an alum of my high school. He went to the Hawks in the expansion draft-Sam McCallum-one of 12 black people in the whole town-2 families. May the best team win.
stickler
Welcome to the world of a Pacific Northwest sports fan. You name it: Seahawks, Mariners, Cougars, Huskies; all of ’em have the fate — MOST of the time — to snatch defeat from the jaws of victory.
And I will pass by the undignified steaming pile that is the Portland TrailBlazers without comment.
The only safe course of action is to presume that your team is going to suck when it counts. This has the double advantage of being: a) true, most of the time, and b) a pleasant surprise when disproven.
Oh, and go back to the box wine. It helps dull the pain.
zzyzx
Please please please PLEASE Hawks, just this once.
Squiggler
Typepad is down for maintenance all night, so I’m indulging my blogging withdrawal by posting comments. John, John, I give to you this comfort (received by reliable source thru the miracle of spam email):
Peyton Manning, after living a full life, died peacefully. When he got to heaven, God was showing him around. They came to a modest one-story house with a faded Colts flag in the window. “This house is yours for eternity, Peyton,” said God. “This is very special; not everyone gets a house up here.”
Peyton felt special, indeed, and walked up to his house. On his way up the porch, he noticed another house just around the corner. It was a 3-story mansion with a black and gold sidewalk. It had a 50 ft. tall flagpole with an enormous Steelers flag. In every window was a Terrible Towel.
Peyton look at God and said, “God, I am certainly not ungrateful, but I have a question. I was an all-pro QB, I held many NFL records, and I was even inducted into the Hall of Fame.”
God said, “So, what’s your point Peyton?”
“Well, why does Ben Roethlisberger get a better house than me?”
God chuckled and said, “Peyt, that’s not Ben’s house, it’s mine.”
GO STEELERS!
Grotesqueticle
You Pburgh fans are the worst. Good friend of mine, graduated Pitt, moved down here to Georgia to teach in ’91. Moved back to Pburgh in ’99. Flash to the 2000 season. First pre-season game of the year, 3 minutes into the game. He calls me up ranting about how bad the Steelers suck. I just got done laughing about that. His best friend’s (who is still here in Georgia) father is even worse. When the Steelers games are on, he locks himself in his upstairs bedroom and won’t come out until the game is over. He tapes them. If the Steelers win, he watches the tape. Woe betide the person who disturbs him when he is locked in his room. True stories.
Alexandra
You know what? That’s pretty cute.
Doug
I’m a fan of the Indiana Hoosiers, the Pacers, the Colts, and the Cleveland Indians. Your anxious fear of futility is well founded as I can attest from the Hoosiers’ 2002 loss to Maryland, the Pacers’ 2000 loss to the Lakers, the Colts constantly choking in the big games, and the Indians’ losses to Atlanta in 1995 and, more painfully, to Florida in 1997. And none of my teams look to have championships anywhere in their futures.
Good luck.
Slide
This over a freakin football game? Yikes. Ok, I have no interst in who wins or not but I just HAVE to root for the Sea Hawks now just to keep Cole in a fragile and emotional state. (kinda sounds like my ex-wife)
ppGaz
My Super Bowl wishes:
1) May the best team win. I don’t know which one that is.
2) For my wallet, I have the Hawks and 4 points. I can win the wager and the Steelers can win the game.
3) For the office pool, I have some good numbers. I can win this wager too.
Even if the best team doesn’t win and I don’t make a dime, it can still be an enjoyable game.
John, try to put it all in perspective. Twenty years from now, nobody is going to give a shit who won this game. Not even the rabid fans in Pittsburgh. Not even you.
Richard Bottoms
As they say, I don’t have a dog in this fight so I’ll root for your guys to win.
BTW, whwen are you going to write about this rage over these cartoons of Allah so I can comment how stupid it is and for the Muslim world to get over it already, it is the 21st century.
If I wanted to live by Saudi Arabia’s interpretation of First Amendment rights I’d move there. Same goes for the Joint Chiefs indigestion of the Toles cartoon. Neither the government nor the clerics have shit to say about our opinions eitherby printed word or satrical cartoon.
They all need to screw off.
Rich Haave
Quit worrying, start grilling.
ppGaz
While I’m on record as saying that the Toles cartoon was unnecessarily offensive (that is to say, the point could have been made in many other, and probably better, ways) …. I agree about the freedom of speech angle.
Somebody in the government doesn’t like a cartoon? Fuck ’em. And that goes for the JCS, too. If the chiefs really care about their people, then let them do their jobs accordingly and leave the cartoonists alone. All the cartoons are belong to us …. the people.
Richard Bottoms
BTW, what is it exactly that Hugo Chavez done that makes him public enemy number one?
Aside from liking Castro, something he has in common with my farthest far left friends, what is it that he is doing down there that I should care?
Because if it is about running a dictatorship should Mubarak be included on the list?
Stormy70
Queso tip for the Superbowl – Add evaporated milk to make it creamy. This has been a public service announcement.
Louise
Squiggler, I love that. I’m calling my Indy parents immediately to torment them with your post.
John, you know I’m with you, but I have to say I’m glad you weren’t born a Red Sox fan, because you’d be dead by now. Find something large and inanimate to punch around and let off some steam.
Bob In Pacifica
Ah, yes, I remember how exciting it was with the first of our four or five Super Bowls, all victories. It was in Detroit, too. That was back when there was an auto industry there.
Mean Gene
My Bettis jersey is hung in my closet. I’m going through dip receipes to determine which is the luckiest. I went out to a sports bar last night and saw dozens of pretty girls wearing Steeler jerseys, denim miniskirts, and knee-high boots. It was the costume de noir. God, I LOVE football.
The losses always hurt more for me than the wins feel good. If we’d lost to the Colts or the Broncos I would’ve been devastated. They won, and while I was happy, a few hours later I was able to function without skipping or giggling.
This game is different. If the Steelers lose, I’ll be crushed. But the pain will pass, as it has after all the big games we’ve lost the last ten years. But if they win, if they WIN. That’s a triumph we’ll be able to hold onto for the rest of our lives. It’s a huge emotional overlay. It’s a can’t-lose proposition. And the Steelers WON’T lose. Not with the overwhelming psychic energy concentrated here in Western PA. Not with me wearing my Bettis jersey and drinking my lucky Yuengling. GO STEELERS!
Sine.Qua.Non
John needs a seriously intense distraction…..
Jay C
John, we, your dedicated blogfollowers DO feel for you: even where we are otherwise utterly disinterested (in its true, legal sense: not “uninterested”) in the Super Bowl fate of the Steelers. Have you considered the judicious use of some serotonin-reuptake inhibitors? Or, failing that, some good old-fashioned booze? Just, come victory or defeat, don’t let your mood intefere with your blogging.
Disquieting minds want to know!
Ross
That’s just about how I felt during the prez election 2004. My boy lost, and I felt real shitty for a couple days, but life goes on :P
Go Seahawks!
Rocky Mountain High
John,
Relax, take a couple of deep breaths and have another glass of red. I recommend the BIN 555 from Wyndham Estates (AU), fruity, but with a bold finish.
In the meantime rest assured that all will be well. I’ve been following the Steelers since the early 70’s and over the years I found that while the country may be on the fast section of the slippery slope to despotism the winning or losing of a Super Bowl won’t affect the final outcome.
After a while you may even graduate to a higher form of the game – Rugby Union. It’s faster, with more action, and none of the silly pads and helmets.
That said … GO STEELERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
profbacon
As a Toledoean… I`m on the the hellish votex of the Lions, the Bengals, and the Browns. I haven`t had a reason to feel get excited about a Superbowl since 198-fucking-9. I like you John, but the Steelers have been the cause of a good deal of woe in my house. But honestly, this year I`m watching the comericals, and hopeing that Keith Richards exposes Mick Jagger`s breast at halftime.
demimondian
John, I suggest that you’re not experiencing Steelers isomnia, but rather a reaction to withdrawing from food and from alcohol. Seriously — the period two to three weeks after such withdrawal is frequently the hardest; that’s when your body starts realizing that somebody’s stolen its calorie source and shifting over to famine mode.
This discomfort will pass soon enough.
Tim F.
demi,
Reply for you on another thread. Just an FYI.
profbacon
ok, any other really bad places to live if you follow pro-sports? Toledo is a hell-hole, but what do people in Nebraska and the Dakotas do? follow college sports?
guyermo
I wouldn’t mind seeing the Seahawks win just to see John cry.
my cat
John, Even tho I live in the Puget Sound area, I will root for the Steelers for you. You obviusly care more than I do. Do you know anyone with a perscription for Xanax?
Perry Como
How about a patriotic Democrat?
Rick Lee
Hmmm… reading that post makes me soooo happy I don’t watch football. It’s a sickness.
Mac Buckets
JC, your boys have made it through to the Big Game of the season out of the six-slot! The year is a success whether they win or lose — the angst should be reserved for Cowboys fans…right, Stormy? Today should be cake and ice cream, not the meat and potatoes. Enjoy!
Drew
My roommate was so nervous for the Broncos v. Packers Superbowl he was dead drunk by the 4th quarter and passed out before the final play. He can’t remember anything past halftime of the greatest Broncos game of all time. Stay away from the brown booze John!
demimondian
Tim F. — thanks for the heads up about the other thread. I answered over there
Mac Buckets
Finally, some useful information from the intertrons!
My wife irreverently calls today Queso Sunday. It’s the one day a year I will eat like it was my job. Velveeta and Ro-Tel are for the regular season. Super Bowl grub is all about the homemade — Chihuahua and Queso Blanco with plum tomatoes and freshly roasted poblanos, chipotles and jalapenos. Wings that may incinerate a novice tongue. Shrimp-artichoke dip. My wife’s pico de gallo. Pizza Margherita at halftime. And a great Belgian beer or ten.
See, you couldn’t possibly eat all that if you cared who won. John’s Super Bowl meal: five rolls of Tums.
Good to be a Texans fan today.
J-Smith
Couple things going on here…
1) Hey, John… relax. Drink a beer. Here, have another one. Watch Jerome run. Watch Ben throw the ball. Watch Troy kick bird ass.
2) Some Danish paper published a cartoon and Muslims worldwide went into a perfect orgy of affrontedness, kidnapping people, burning embassies, …
Then some paper in the US published a cartoon critical of the secretary of defense and the joint chiefs of staff brought in a tank brigade to level their building.
No, wait. I got that last part wrong. What happened was, they wrote a letter.
Jesus. In the US, anyone can write a letter. Even the joint chiefs of staff. So saying
J-Smith
Whoops. Forgot my fuckin’ end-blockquote.
It’d be easier if there was some rudimentary syntax checking around here.
demimondian
I see you’re not just an ideological deviant.
Today is Campbell’s Cheddar Cheese soup and Ro-Tel. Chicken curry with a mango/ginger base to cool things off. And lentil dhal to go with it.
Joey
Insert “Reds” in place of “Indians” and that’s my sentiment as well. I honestly thought the Colts and Pacers were going to win their respective titles this year, and the Hoosiers were looking very good as well until the last couple of weeks. It puts me in a deep depression every time the Hoosiers lose, so the past few years have really sucked for me. As far as the Big Game goes, I guess I’ll root for the Steelers, just because of Randle El.
Mac Buckets
Campbell’s? Only if you are doing penance. Yuck.
Mac Buckets
Really? You wouldn’t know it by this “political” blog. Too busy with Super Bowl and NASA to write about little stuff like burning embassies and Muslims pledging death to Europeans…because of a cartoon.
Note to self: If I ever do anything that could be embarrassing or shocking if it got into the news, do it Super Bowl Weekend.
demimondian
Hey, what can I say? I’m a Democrat, remember? It’s just liberal guilt drawn large.
demimondian
Go back through the press releases from the White House on any given Friday, Mac…
I’m more worried about the churches burned on Thursday night, though. Does anybody have anything new on that story?
Otto Man
My Chiefs haven’t been to the big game since I was in diapers — and at the rate they’re going, may not get there again until I’m back in diapers — so I can only be jealous of your nervous excitement.
Good luck. If the Steelers don’t pull it out and you’re reduced to tears, at least you’ll be able to put all those Terrible Towels to good use.
ppGaz
Finally, useful information from you, MacB :-)
ppGaz wings are weapons of mass destruction.
And our homemade salsa! Along with homemade tortilla chips and a few six packs of Negra Modelo or something similar.
Tums are for tomorrow. Today is for overindulgence.
Richard Bottoms
The Joint Chiefs can write a letter. On private stationary, not that of the US government.
And the reason they don’t send over soldiers to arrest Mr. Toles is because people like me complain loudly whenever our rights are violated, infringed, or abused.
You know, liberals.
S
This is the most EMO entry I have ever seen in your journal Mr. Cole.
Richard Bottoms
Which is pretty stupid behaviour. Sort of the same way we thought about Lenny Bruce going to jail for saying fuck. Or Janet Jacksons $500,000 titty flash.
I’m glad the Danes told them kiss their collective asses.
So when is half time so I can look at all the cool commercials?
Stormy70
{shiver} That is blashpemy here in Texas. If one is tough, add green chilis, real ones from NM, and chili petines. Of course, ppgaz and Mac have the correct menu ideas today. I will only be watching the Superbowl for the commercials and half-time show.
The rest of the time I will be mocking the radical Muslims Superbowl celebration.
DecidedFenceSitter
See I don’t cook snacks today.
At 7 o’clock, the food starts hitting the table.
7.5 lbs of slow cooked BBQ country style ribs.
2.5 lbs of grilled teriyaki steak
2.5 lbs of grilled chinese BBQ steak
2.5 lbs of grilled
5.0 lbs of plain steak.
2 lbs of grilled chinese spare ribs.
3+ lbs of grilled vegetables
Plus whatever sides my 30ish guests bring. Next year, no open invite.
Gray
Hmm, I’m used to hear some hype when soccer fans here in Germany talk about their teams and the championship, but this is another dimension. In my humble prejudice, Americans are always a lil bit crazy, but during the last days before superbowl they obviously morph into real nutcases :-/
CaseyL
John, you’re just the cutest thing. I mean that. It’s incredibly sweet and charming that you can love your team that much, and angst over the game that much.
This doesn’t mean I don’t want the Hawks to completely blow the Steelers out of the stadium; it just means I’ll be compassionate about it, and not gloat (much).
Are they saving the best commercials for half-time? That seems kind of dumb, since a lot of people use halftime to got to the bathroom, dash out to the store, and such. I’m not sure the prospect of seeing The Geezerist Rock’n’Roll Band in the World will make much difference.
The Rolling Stones as halftime entertainment is just…weird. Wierder than when McCartney played the Super Bowl, because McCartney never made a special point of presenting himself as a Big Bad Outlaw. From “Their Satanic Majesties” to “a buncha oldish guys leaping around on a football field, singing,” is a bit of a comedown.
Go Hawks!!
Louise
Here, it’s all about homemade “Skyline” chili — refined over the years and as good as the real thing. Made yesterday, because it’s much better after a night in the fridge. Over spaghetti with the grated cheese. Also, conies, made with the cheap boiled weiners, of course, and a wooden stick to apply the line of yellow mustard under the chili and cheese. Four-ways, if you want; inverted, if you must. No five-ways. Five-ways are The Evil and are outlawed.
For those who don’t know what I’m talking about, too bad. Never mind.
Stormy70
The best half-time show would feature the best marching bands in the country, instead of the Strolling Bones. I can dream, right?
Free enchilada tip. If you brush the outside of your corn tortillas with olive oil, then roll up the enchilada, the outsides will be pleasantly browned and crispier. This technique will make a breakfast enchilada an even more heavenly experience.
Flour tortillas do not a good enchilada make.
ppGaz
Oh yes, chili and spaghetti, an old ppGaz family favorite. Plenty o’cheese and some minced onions too, to taste of course. The onions are optional.
And Stormy is right about the enchiladas. Maiz, no molido.
Paul Wartenberg
You should be watching ESPN 2 as they run their annual broadcasts of the NFL Films’ Super Bowl specials. Although I don’t understand the rhyme/reason for showing them out of order: they’ve jumped from Super Bowl IX to Super Bowl II to Super Bowl XVII and back again. Dudes, just show them in chronological order, making sure that the TiVo and video tapers are aware when they can record the episodes for the classics like SB III, SB X, SB XIII, SB XX, SB XXIII, SB XV, SB XXXII, SB XXXIV, and my personal fave SB XXXVII. :grin:
Forget SB VII, damn bleeping Dolphins…vastly overrated, utterly boring game other than finding out Garo’s QB passing rating is negative infinity…
And if you can’t recall the SB by the Roman numerals, then dude go back to Latin class. :wicked grin:
Mac Buckets
Flour tortillas make enchiladas into burritos, right?
ppGaz
Well, out here (AZ) the enchilada is tradtionally a corn tortilla filled with cheese and other goodies and baked and then sauced.
Whereas the meat or bean-filled flour tortilla is a burro.
scs
You guys are getting me hungry!
ppGaz
Super Bowl? Detroit? Snow today?
HAHAHA! The Chamber of Commerce here asks me to suggest that you flip your tv to CBS and the FBR Open and observe life today in my back yard. Seventy degrees on my patio thermometer as of about one minute ago.
demimondian
demimondian
Sixty-three and sunny in the demi-backyard right now — and in August, it’ll be the same temperature.
ppGaz
Two possible responses:
1) You really know how to hurt a guy
2) Are you sure your thermometer isn’t inside the guest cottage?
demimondian
Heh. I’m a no-longer-poor corporate drone, but I’m not a rich corporate drone.
No, that’s the exterior temperature.
Of course, I’m surpressing the fact that today is the first day in six weeks that we’ve seen enough sun that the demi-brood could do yard work, so we spent the first two-thirds of the day transplanting stuff and repairing the yard after the winter. As Casey L and the other PNW types will tell you, after yesterday’s wind storm, that was a necessary operation.
Beside, the contractor breaks ground on the extension tomorrow or Tuesday, so we needed the toys picked up outside.
DonnieJ
Congratulations to the NFL champs… The Pittsburgh Steelers! They done did it dude!