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23
Nov

The 2008 Kansas Science Exam

by John Cole

Via Donklephant, the 2008 Kansas Science Exam:

1. Some sources suggest the earth is approximately 4.55 billion years old. Others estimate the earth is 6,012 years old. Without favoring one estimate over the other, calculate the likely age of God. Show your work.

2. The presidency of George W. Bush is an example of:
a. Heredity
b. Parasitism
c. Survival of the fittest
d. Predestination
e. Judicial activism
f. Divine intervention

3. If male zebra finches are raised by foster parents of another species, the Bengalese finch, they will court female Bengalese finches instead of females of their own kind. Which statement best explains their behavior?
a. Birds are animals!
b. Imprinting
c. Gold-digging
d. What happens in Bengal stays in Bengal
e. Co-habituation
f. If you’d ever had the chance to court a Bengalese finch, you wouldn’t have to ask

4. The fossil record contains:
a. Fossils
b. Gaps
c. Skips
d. A couple of hits, but mostly B-sides
e. An elaborately, not to say intelligently, designed hoax consisting of pre-aged rocks arranged in the shapes of bones, teeth, footprints and eggs

5. Evolutionists claim that some moths have changed color to blend in with their background. This is an example of:
a. Assimilation
b. Tokenism
c. Natural selection
d. Hate speech
e. Social climbing
f. Mistaken identity

Heh.

Humor, Science and Technology | 11:51 am |

9 Responses to “The 2008 Kansas Science Exam”

  1. 1
    November 23rd, 2005 at 1:17 pm Reply to this comment

    jg

    Bengalese finches are sexy birds man.

  2. 2
    November 23rd, 2005 at 1:26 pm Reply to this comment

    Justin Gardner

    Hey John, the link to the actual editorial doesn’t work anymore.

    Here’s the new one: http://www.startribune.com/sto.....35618.html

  3. 3
    November 23rd, 2005 at 1:46 pm Reply to this comment

    skip

    You skipped a question:

    If a tree fell in the forest and no one was there, would it sound like George W. Bush looks?

  4. 4
    November 23rd, 2005 at 3:15 pm Reply to this comment

    Krista

    Don’t forget the bonus question:

    When, scientifically, does pregnancy occur?
    a. As soon as the sperm fertilizes the egg.
    b. As soon as the girl hits puberty, because all mature eggs are babies just waiting to be born.
    c. As soon as James Dobson says it occurs.
    d. I’m not married, so I’m not allowed to know the answer to this question.

  5. 5
    November 23rd, 2005 at 3:30 pm Reply to this comment

    TallDave

    Hilarious!

    Thanks for sharing.

  6. 6
    November 23rd, 2005 at 8:42 pm Reply to this comment

    the friendly grizzly

    If a man makes a statement in the forest and a feminist is not around to hear him, is he still a sexist pig?

  7. 7
    November 24th, 2005 at 1:18 am Reply to this comment

    Sine.Qua.Non

    You guys are cute and this post is hilarious!

  8. 8
    November 24th, 2005 at 6:31 am Reply to this comment

    Cathy Young

    Hilarious! thanks for the good laugh.

  9. 9
    November 24th, 2005 at 11:03 pm Reply to this comment

    BIRDZILLA

    The galapagos finches have different types of beaks for different feeding styles the WOODPECKER FINCH uses a cactus spine to probe for grubs in wood but this till dosnt prove evolution happened it dose prove INTELLEGENT DESIGN