Look, just because Obama won and Michelle is putting in a garden at the White House does not mean there is any excuse for the NY Times publishing this nonsense:
I BOUNDED off the Q train in Brooklyn one night last winter and headed to Union Street, past the yogurt shop and the firehouse, to do some grocery shopping. But my plans soon went awry.
“You’re suspended,” the entrance worker at the Park Slope Food Coop announced as I swiped my membership card. Some entrance workers speak softly, but not this one. Worse, there were a dozen other shoppers within earshot.
Flushed, defeated and taken aback — I knew I owed the co-op some work, but I didn’t know I had been blacklisted — I slunk around the corner for a takeout burrito. But no amount of mushrooms and spinach could diminish my shame and guilt.
Established in 1973, the co-op, with about 15,000 members who enjoy savings of up to 40 percent on environmentally friendly groceries, is one of the oldest, largest and most successful institutions of its kind in the country. Unlike many co-ops — including the Flatbush Food Coop in Brooklyn, where guests are allowed to shop without joining and members who don’t want to serve work hours can pay a slight markup for items — Park Slope has one of the stiffest work requirements: 2.75 hours every four weeks for each adult member of a household.
It also has some of the best bargains. The organic spinach that costs $2.97 at the co-op fetches $3.99 at the Whole Foods in Union Square; 17 ounces of Bionaturae Organic Extra Virgin Olive Oil costs co-op members $7.80 and Whole Foods shoppers $13.99.
It goes on like that for three pages, and I want that five minutes of my life back. I seriously can not tell if that is a real person or a right-wing spoof/caricature of a NY lefty.
And by the way, they ask for less than three hours a month in volunteering. Is s/he really unable to find LESS THAN THREE HOURS A MONTH? Here is a hint- go volunteer instead of writing crap like this.
merl
I kind of hate those guys, too.
Jack T.
Sounds like author guy got what s/he had coming to him. Feel good story of the day, IMO.
General Winfield Stuck
Even Lefty birdfood eaters must perform communal service and teh Papers in Order in the Obamunist Union.
My guess right wing spoof of libtards, and fairly good spoof considering their usual hackish attempts.
Loneoak
I tried volunteering at my local WalMart, but they told me that only their employees are allowed to do unpaid work.
ThatLeftTurnInABQ
If only the author had remembered to email his certs to the co-op, this whole misunderstanding could have been avoided. Instead he has to bear the laughter of the helicopters. Let that be a lesson to us all.
Modulo Myself
The Park Slope Co-op is notorious for its all-around narcissism. You should see it the cadres in operation on the special recycling days.
geg6
I’d kill for a coop like that and, hell, I’d put in 10 hours a month for bargains like that. Lazy ass fucker.
LD50
Really looks like a spoof, given lines like:
However, if it’s not a spoof,
…if Red State folks are justified in hating Coastal Elites for stuff like that, are said Coastal Elites then justified in hating the Red States folks for babbling about NASCAR, guns and Sarah Palin? If not, what’s the difference?
Sarah in Brooklyn
That was the stupidest article ever. I’ve been a co-op member for 10 years, and it’s a terrific place with great food at great prices. IF you do your non-onerous workshift. Pretty simple.
They Live By Night
Ah, yes, this is my neighborhood. These sorts of Park Slope types can be very, very annoying, but they’re mostly harmless. On the other hand, some days I probably hate them more than the tea baggers from, say, Alabama do.
Brendan
I have a family member, a feminist activist, who once described the people at the coop as “grim communist dykes.” I rather think she’s got their number.
Demo Woman
Bitsy has more than 1600 votes and the Little Bastard has 884. How sweet it its.
I agree with John, I read the article online yesterday and it was a waste. I do think that the front page article about Obama being a guy’ guy was hilarious and I don’t mean in a ha ha way.
jeff
I have had roommates here who are just like this, so there’s no reason to think it’s a spoof. On the other hand, most of the New Yorkers in my current part of Brooklyn eat “meat” of unknown affinities peddled by cart pushing ancient midgets with soiled hands. I don’t know what my point was.
Will
I used to live in Park Slope. Assholes like that are why I don’t anymore. I hated that co-op. All these dipshits standing around in orange nylon like they’re hazard workers or something.
calipygian
What kind of fucking idiot puts spinach and mushrooms in a fucking burrito?
Gah.
Brachiator
In a down economy, with millions out of work, the idea of people being well-off enough to have free time to volunteer (or not) at a food co-op is one of the unintentional ironies of life in America.
Calming Influence
I’m not going to read it because I’ll probably find out I’ve been paying way too much for my free-range arugula.
LD50
But if one is unemployed, shouldn’t that make it all that much *easier* to volunteer at a Co-op? Or was that your point?
Regnad Kcin
Having belonged to that co-op 20 years ago, I found its experiment in collective labor extremely eye-opening. While some of the time I spent working there was productive, it was amazing how many of our shift-hours were completely–and I mean completely–wasted.
I was disillusioned in the extreme. It would have been much better to allow those who could to pay more (for admittedly waaaay better food), and allow those who couldn’t to work the hours, and pay professionals with the markup to cover the gap (if any).
Seriously, we were useless. Stacking and re-stacking the same boxes, just to hit the monthly hours.
kyle
There’s something wrong with eating organic food? I agree w/ LD50.
The article’s writing did suck, but that’s a different issue.
Thanks to Loneoak for the WalMart joke, it’s a good one.
Brachiator
@LD50:
You’re joking, right? Please tell me that you are joking.
Calming Influence
If you’re unemployed, you’re supposed to be eating at McDonald’s. A full day worth of calories in every Happy Meal!
Cassidy
O/t
Anthony
I think the main thing to take away from this (speaking as a British conservative, which makes me… well, I’m not sure what it makes me in American terms these days) is simply the degree to which the sort of people who get to write this sort of article in the leading newspapers are wildly disconnected from anything even approximating what amounts to real life for the vast majority of people. This is true on both sides of the political spectrum, but it’s especially galling for a lot of people when the person writing happens to be a bleeding heart leftie (those of us on right aren’t expected to give a damn).
About six months ago on this side of the pond there was a piece by a journo for one of the left-leaning newspapers that was intented to illustrate the travails of an ordinary middle class family by drawing on her own experience. The terrifying heartbreak caused by the collapse of the economy seemed largely to consist of:
1) Uncertainty as to whether or not she would be able to continue to employ a full-time nanny.
2) Worries over whether she would be able to afford the school fees for the educational establishment of choice for her third child.
3) An inability to comfortably afford a second annual holiday abroad.
4) Having to ask herself before dining out whether she could really justify spending the money.
5) The horrifying emotional apocalypse of having to tell her family that this year there would be no Christmas shopping trip to New York.
Now, we all have our problems and I suppose it would be churlish to assert that these particular issues were somehow illegitimate. The key thing really was the degree to which the author and, presumably, the editorial staff who agreed to run the thing, were of the view that this actually was a recognisable portrait of average middle class life in Britain. In reality, it’s representative only of the sort of a slightly odd London bubble in which a lot of senior newspaper and broadcast journos (generally the sort of people who would be horrified if you asserted for an instant that they might not be entirely sympatico with the working class) live their lives.*
*Note: I don’t include all journos in this. We’re talking high-ranking national newspaper staff, op-ed people and broadcast journos mostly. I lived with a very diligent wire service journalist for three years and she worked all the hours God sent for very low pay indeed.
Genine
I know a number of people like the author of this piece. They’re friends of mine. They’re not bad. They have good goals. There just seems to be some disconnects in their brains which makes their intention of doing good seem like they’re full of shit.
I just smile and nod and try to concentrate on my own authenticity in my actions.
LD50
@Brachiator: I’m missing your point. Is your point that buying food at a Co-op is too expensive for someone who’s unemployed? ‘Cuz that’s not my experience.
JGabriel
John Cole:
Sorry, maybe it’s because I’m a New Yorker, but I’m having a real hard time differentiating between texts like the Cole quote above and writing like the essay he’s criticizing.
She’s a Brooklyn foodie who likes poetry; he’s a WV foodie who likes football. Other than sounding like a recipe for a really bad sitcom, I’m not seeing the reason for the hate and anger.
It seems kind of hypocritical, actually.
.
Stephen1947
You got a lot further into that article than I did – I worked in a regional food co-op for a few years back in mid-70s, early 80s, and I’m amazed they’re still around. They seem to attract a higher proportion of self-important people than any other social/political activity that I’ve ever been part of. Apparently even those who can’t get it together to do their member hours are just as bad.
I don’t recall getting much further than the mushroom/spinach burrito in this whine. My, how the NYT has fallen…
Joel
To be fair, the NY Times is a local/national publication and that’s definitely a local interest story.
Svensker
About twice a month the Times runs some article about rich
City peopletwits that just make you want to puke. Or go beat up one of those folks carrying a $2000 purse.Laura W
@Calming Influence:
Whenever I wonder why I hang around this dog-forsaken place, I just remember quips like this.
Also to pimp rescue dogs for millions for more rescue efforts.
Too.
Bitsy shortly after arriving at her “foster” home with Sylvia and Barney. Broken hind leg, malnourished. Look at that face, people, and tell me she is not cute. I double dog dare you!
Brachiator
@LD50:
No, I think that people don’t understand how lucky they are, and how rare it is, to live a life where one of your biggest financial decisions is whether to volunteer at a food co-op or pay $13.99 for extra virgin olive oil.
ruemara
I work part time for actual cash. I run 2 home based businesses and work on art projects because I’m deluded into believing in a future. I raid on weekends.
Through it all, I still spend 6 to 10 hours preparing myself to do my 1.5 hrs of service for my food co-op.
As a NYer, I hereby pronounce that article’s writer a douche.
Now that I’ve wasted valuable writing time, I will now go back to writing this month’s article for the co-op.
LD50
@Brachiator: Um, okay. So there isn’t really crazy for an unemployed person to do 3 hours a month at a food co-op.
eastriver
Yes, you need to look in a mirror, JC. Better yet, pick up Tunch and look in the mirror.
You’re going to make fun of somebody getting all bloggy about their food co-op when you take time, every day of your life, to tell people ABOUT YOUR DOG? And to vote for your dog IN A CONTEST?
Are you looking in the mirror? With Tunch? That’s a hypocrite looking back at you, JC. And I’m not talking about the one with the furry face.
And you have the balls to suggest this guy volunteer. Well, I would suggest JC that you adopt a child and stop obsessing over your pet.
PurpleGirl
I read about a page and a half before I tired of her whining and changed the web page.
Violet
OT – Bitsy talk…
Laura W. and Sylvia, is there any truth to the rumor on the dog blog that the four finalists or the winner will be on Oprah this week? And that they are choosing the four finalists tonight? If so, we need to keep the pressure up for Little Bitsy. Go Bitsy!
Napoleon
Are we sure the guy who wrote that is not the same guy who ran that Acorn scam dressed up as what a true suburban white boy thinks pimps dress like?
linda
ever spent any time walking thru park slope? that piece is most definitely not snark.
and don’t get me started on their snotty little spawn clogging the sidewalks.
Hael
I mostly just skim the RSS feed for this site and have been ignoring all the Bitsy stuff as I assumed it was just some silly competition but now that I found out about the whole rescue thing I pretty much have to vote.
Sly
Red America hates coastal elites because we give all their hard earned tax dollars to lazy brown people. That’s money that the Proud God-Fearing Majority could be spending on crystal meth and abortions.
It has nothing to do with what we buy or how we buy it. Even if it was, I’d take the most douchiest Brooklyn hipster over what passes for Authentic Americana in our national discourse any day of the week.
Brachiator
@LD50:
Um, okay. You don’t get it and you were not joking.
Laura W
@Violet: All I can say, while neither confirming nor denying anything, is that it would be irresponsible not to speculate, Violet.
John Cole
@eastriver: You totally are not catching the difference between a blog and a major newspaper, are you?
And Bitsy isn’t my dog.
LD50
@Brachiator: Why don’t you give me a coherent explanation of what was actualy wrong about my statement? You haven’t done that yet.
Anne Laurie
Yeah, that was my first impression also.
As has often been said, while cleaning up after unskilled, overenthusiastic, uncommitted, incompetent, or plain crazy volunteers at science-fiction conventions / dog obedience & agility trials / quilt shows… “Sometimes a volunteer is worth every penny you’re not paying them.”
Incidentally, a spinach & mushroom burrito is damned tasty with a good white sauce. I could be a vegetarian, if I had to, but I’d rather be dead than vegan!
AhabTRuler
No comment.
Zifnab
@John Cole: That they’re not paying you as much?
El Cid
As much as I can’t stand the eco-yuppie stores in general, particularly when they’re stocking up on smug, why is blushing over some organic spinach at a food co-op all gay & coastal elitist, but a $600 handheld GPS unit from the Bass Pro Shops is just patriotic small town Main Street Red America values? Pffft.
calipygian
Especially since the organic spinach was probably grown in America while the GPS unit was probably put together by a Chinese technician making 10 bucks a day in a technology park across the river from Hong Kong.
sparky
both of the commenters above who point out the NYT runs idiotic “travails of the uberclass” stories every so often and that the NYT is also a local paper are correct.
might i suggest, as a more longstanding sense of the NYT local reader,
calipygian
The only think that is a burrito in my book is a bean and cheese concoction that will give me enough gas to inflate the Hindenburg 6 hours after I eat it.
sparky
@sparky: crap.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/19/nyregion/19diary.html?_r=1
LD50
It takes you that long?
Left Coast Tom
…as a title for a blog post bitching about another silly article in the “New York Times”?! The paper that gave Judith Miller her “fluff Bush” platform? The paper that continues to publish a stream of articles whining about the Horrible Indignities heaped upon the people who caused a global financial meltdown? “Red America” is the primary base of support for those idiots.
Xecky Gilchrist
@calipygian: Yup, that’s a burrito by my definition too. When I lived in So. Cal you could barely turn around without hitting a good burrito stand, like these guys (although the business seems to have changed in the more than 20 years since I left; not seeing their signature “Garbage Burrito” on the menu.)
Violet
@Laura W:
Of course I must speculate. I can just imagine Little Bitsy getting an Oprah segment! Sylvia and Evelyn should be there too. Will you and John be getting honorable mentions for all your hard work? And a hat tip to Jame Wolcott, of course.
Does Oprah even like dogs? I’ve hardly ever seen her show.
Joel
@John Cole: Again, to be fair, John, I think this is a NY times “N.Y. / Region” feature. It’s not geared to appeal to the “everyday Joe” because that guy doesn’t live in New York City. It’s an outrageously expensive place with consumer behavior that’s massively discordant with the rest of the country. But that said, they’re Americans all the same. And the NY Times is still the NY newspaper (of record).
JGabriel
Sly:
Ditto. I’d much rather listen to a self-absorbed idealist than some Wyoming Valley redneck spouting the latest Fox News talking point.
.
Xecky Gilchrist
@LD50: I think calipygian may mean for 6 hours after I eat it – that’s how I read it, though I’m often affected longer than that.
Laura W
@Violet:
Does John Cole like the Steelers?
Zuzu's Petals
@Joel:
I’ve been a member of my local coop for years now. Pay a $300 fee, either up front or over a period of years, and you’re good.
Pretty sure the prices aren’t the cheapest around, but they sure beat Whole Foods…and I get dividends every once in awhile. Plus it’s a great place.
Laura W
@Violet: I had not read the whole story of Sadie’s adoption until just now but I think this bodes quite well in Bitsy’s favor, don’t you, Violet?
Violet
@Laura W:
Oh, wow! Seriously, I never watch Oprah. I guess I’d missed the whole dog thing.
Maybe if the Oprah thing is true, it’s a good sign for Bitsy perhaps making it into the Top 4? Oprah would like another rescue dog to win, I’d think, given that her dog came from a rescue.
Violet
@Laura W:
Yes, definitely! And Little Bitsy is the ultimate underdog. All she needed was someone to love her and the right family came along. They’re all lucky. AND, she was the very last dog to win her week. She worked hard for weeks to try to win and finally did. Ultimate underdog, for sure.
Zuzu's Petals
Oops, that last was supposed to be to geg6 @7.
Allen
My old neighborhood here in Portland had a large number of NYC expats, most were pretty nice people by and large but they sure proved the old New Yorker cover with world ending at the Hudson. My present neighborhood has the best general purpose grocery store in the region (shameless plug for New Seasons, which is putting Whole Foods out of business here, yea), and the best food co-op (People’s) in the region. Both are the most unpretentious institutions around, and that’s saying a lot for the NW. The only thing that NYC has that we don’t is a truly decent pizza (and self-absorbed journalists). So come visit Portland, don’t miss the Clinton neighborhood, just don’t stay.
Zuzu's Petals
@Allen:
My son and his wife love New Seasons.
eastriver
JC, I meant “bloggy” as a descriptive for the form of writing.
I stand corrected about the contest dog, I guess. I skip all the dog stuff you post, so I wrongly supposed that it was your dog.
But you’ve still got alot of fucking nerve making fun of somebody when you post about your dog on a near-daily basis.
(What, did you see something in Arianna’s How To Blog book about Confiding Domestic Details To Establish An Emotional Relationship Between You And Your Blogging Audience?)
Please don’t bother defending yourself. I don’t even know why I bother. Why should you?
John Cole
@eastriver: Sorry Hillary lost last year.
geg6
Zuzu’s Petals @62: No coops here. :( As for the Bitsy thing, things are looking good and that’s great. I hope everyone who votes for Bitsy tonight sends along some good vibes to young Cane, my John’s daughter’s dog with their votes. He is undergoing emergency surgery right now and I hope he’ll be okay.
Chad N Freude
@calipygian:
A latte-sipping coastal elitist, of course, who wants to show solidarity with downtrodden Latin American immigrants.
Martin
Your point was that in a city of 10 million, you can find any fucked up population of 15,000 without even trying.
Hell, NYC probably has a cannibal population of 15,000.
General Winfield Stuck
@John Cole:
The Hell you say, not me.
snark, I know.
JGabriel
@Martin:
Yes, but almost all of them are CEO’s. It’s really disconcerting.
.
RedKitten
Why don’t you throw in a “Bah, humbug!” for good measure, you cranky arse?
A few points:
1. It’s John’s blog, so if he wants to post about his dog, politics, the size of his dick, or the state of the Chinese economy, it’s totally his prerogative. That’s the purpose of a blog.
2. In case you haven’t noticed, the overwhelming majority of the people who comment here vastly enjoy the posts about his dog and his cat, and indeed, ask for them if one has not been forthcoming in awhile.
3. The NY Times is a newspaper, not a blog, and is thus expected to be held to a different standard for what they print. John is no more being a hypocrite than if I, who dabbles in watercolours, criticized the Guggenheim for showing a major exhibition of some random guy’s toenail clippings.
Martin
@calipygian:
I agree. A salad in a tortilla doesn’t make it a burrito. I had a burrito for lunch – chicken, cheese, beans, salsa, sour cream. I was out of guac, but I survived.
gogol's wife
@RedKitten:
I’m so glad you wrote all this so eloquently while I was trying feebly to formulate it.
Demo Woman
@geg6: Will do. I do hope the dog is okay.
Chad N Freude
@RedKitten: Not that John needs any defense from me (or anyone else, actually), there is a difference between a blogger posting about his pets and the NY Times giving space to a woman who feels so sorry for herself because her feel-good participation in a coop is so insufficiently appreciated that she has to eat yuppie chow to console herself.
Demo Woman
I was involved in a neighborhood food co-op in Dallas. It was a pretty simple operation with a dozen families chipping in. Every week two families went to the farmers market and selected the best vegies to bring back, and bag for pickup.
It was great because the selections varied depending on who was doing the shopping. It was a good way to get the family to eat different foods.
Demo Woman
@RedKitten: Bravo!
Ned Ludd
A co-op is not a charity for adjunct poetry instructors who freelance for the New York Times. It’s a business. If she can’t fulfill the requirements to become a member, she should shop somewhere else. If she doesn’t like their business model, she should shop somewhere else.
Zuzu's Petals
@geg6:
Best thoughts coming doggie’s way.
cdmarine
I gotta say, I was kind of bugged by this post, too. Is the article writer a douchebag? Maybe. I don’t know. Complaining about having to do 2.75 hours of work is lame, and if I really thought that’s the part of this article that JC was recoiling from I’d get it, but I don’t get the feeling that that’s what JC is really reacting to here. What I see is another tired “arugula” rant. But this is a description of a subset of American culture, and I fail to see how it’s any different than much of what gets written on this blog or on any other where the owner occasionally writes about the ups and downs of his/her day. And I fail to see how it’s any different than any description of any other American subculture, including non-coastal ones.
Frankly, I’m getting damn tired of non-coastal America getting propped up as somehow more “real” or more American than coastal America. Guess what? People who live on the coasts and eat fucking arugula are exactly equal in “American-ness” to people who live in Kentucky and eat iceburg lettuce with ranch dressing. This post strikes me as no better than an extended “arugula” rant. Sorry JC. I love this blog, and I’m with you on most of what you write, but this really rubbed me the wrong way.
Martin
Eastriver seems to be unaware of the internet tradition that we make fun of everyone.
The helicopters are laughing.
Fleem
Don’t blame the Co-op for the whining of a spoiled, entitled whiner. I was a member of that co-op for three years. After having been an employee in a St. Paul co-op (the TC’s, as some of us can testify, being home to a series of food co-ops that rival Whole Foods for snazzy merchandise and gloss), that place, in the 90s, was a blast from the past — narrow aisles, no windows, ground rules, seriousness. I don’t remember there being many shifts where there was nothing to do. At the time, working there made you feel like you owned the place, which you did. It’s not a boutique or a neighborhood bodega; it evolved from a private buying club, and remains the property of the members. Follow the rules or don’t go. Everybody got suspended every once in awhile — there was no shame in it, just pain-in-the-ass-ness. You still had to work but couldn’t buy the excellent olives.
I left the neighborhood in 98, a bit before the food-snobbery explosion that apparently bloated the membership to uselessness, and before you could see into the store from outside (they only added a window after there was a robbery and nobody could tell from the street what was happening). They should just limit the size of the membership to a useful number, and have a waiting list for accepting people who actually give a crap after the whiners bail.
It was easy to get behind on the hours you owed, though. If you work fulltime in Manhattan, it’s 45 minutes each way from Park Slope, so there’s less time to spare than you might think.
Zuzu's Petals
@Martin:
I remember Molly Ivins’ great insult:
The kind of people who put olives on their tacos.
Fleem
@Ned Ludd:
What you said.
They Live By Night
@Allen:
I lived in Portland before I moved out to NYC and I love/d it there. It’s a great city, not doubt, but let’s not kid ourselves-decent pizza is not the only thing New York has over Portland. Not by a longshot.
Brachiator
@Xecky Gilchrist:
Looks good. But they have nothing on the Manuel’s Special at El Tepeyac Cafe
However, these days, the burrito is giving place to the taco, with King Taco being one of the best places to get them.
Genine
John’s post would then be followed by a few guys (jokingly) comparing the size of their dicks to the Chinese economy.
@geg
I’m sending nice energy to the doggie. I hope he or she gets well soon.
Chad N Freude
@Ned Ludd: But what about her sense of entitlement? How can you be so unsympathetic?
Genine
@Allen #67
I loved Portland. I lived there for three years after I left Philadelphia. It was major culture shock but a very cool change. I loved New Seasons, too. I’m glad it’s giving Whole Foods a run for its money. Whole Foods is dominant here in Denver, though Vitamin Cottage is growing.
I usually go back to Portland to visit every year. I haven’t gone this year, but I definitely will next year.
“Keep Portland Weird!”
Chad N Freude
@Genine:
Fixed, for accuracy.
eastriver
JC, you’re projecting so much you should be forced to pay IATSE dues. “Hillary”? Really? Shouldn’t you get a new set of Dixie cups?
Redkitten, wow, look how much I made you type! Ahem. Of course JC can blog whatever the fuck he wants. (Although you seem to be itching for some dick chat, but that’s between you and you.) And I can comment whatever the fuck I want. Just like you can comment whatever the fuck you want on my comment. Etcetera. It’s my secularly-attained right to make fun of him, poke him, prod him, ridicule him, and kick him in the literary nutsack if I want.
I’m glad you like his doggy stories. I am. That thought will keep me warm tonight. I only hope JC starts writing Tunch stories from Tunch’s POV. Wouldn’t that be special? Like Babs Bush did for her dog.
Martin, “the internet tradition that we”. Hmmm, is the “we” supposed to be you and the internet? Or you and JC? Awful big of you to share the rules with the rest of us. (See, I’m making fun of you! I, too, can play by your imaginary rules.)
And, to piss everybody off, Go Yankees.
BTW, I’ve been to that co-op. It’s pretty good for what it is. Even though their produce has nothing on Fairway.
Comrade Mary
JPEGs or I’ll cry myself to sleep tonight.
Ned Ludd
She might want to reconsider who was “superfluous”. It seems to me that she got stuck with meaningless tasks, and got another co-worker assigned to her “exit station”, because the store couldn’t count on her to show up for her shifts.
sloan
My co-op won’t bag your groceries even if you’re the only customer in the store. They expect you to help out and do it yourself which is OK I guess, except when it’s busy as hell and you’ve got some 18 year old wannabe hippie chick cashier with $300 salon dreads snapping her gum and staring at you with her arms crossed while you try to pack everything into your 100% recycled canvas shopping bag. And if it doesn’t all fit they’ll sell you a paper bag for 5 cents and sigh loudly to express their extreme displeasure at you for raping Mother Earth.
My favorite was when I forgot my bag and O.M.F.G. had to buy bags for all my groceries.
Me: “Oh, I forgot my bag.”
Salon Dreads: “Oh well, at least you’re trying.”
And yet I keep going back. And paying for the privilege.
bago
@El Cid: If you are paying 600 for gps you’re getting ripped off. That shit had better come with wifi, an OS, wifi, and apps to even be remotely competitive.
DavidNYC
It’s really the title of this post which gets me. John thinks that “Red America” is right to hate the absurd construct of “Coastal Elites” because one woman wrote a whiny article about food co-ops? Okay, whatever.
tc125231
Why on earth did you read it? And, lacking sufficient self discipline to stop, you choose to feel sorry for yourself?
Get a life.
Joel
@calipygian: Spinach, not so much, but chard is definitely authentic burrito filling. And delicious.
Mushrooms are great in tamales.
bago
Most of the people I knew that worked in a co-op were murdered by a montanan psychopath. Thusly I spent half of the thread listening to “still alive” by Jonathan coulton.
RedKitten
First of all, I type quickly, so don’t flatter yourself, sweetheart. And I’m glad that the thought of my enjoyment of doggy stories will keep you warm tonight. I am. If you’re as delightful in real life as you are here, then at least something will be keeping you warm.
You’re right, though. You have every right to visit a blog and spend your valuable time bitching and whining about the topics that the blog host chooses to cover. If that’s how you get your jollies, then yay for you. In fact, I might try it myself, seeing as this hobby obviously brings you so much joy and contentment — indeed, happiness and good cheer are positively radiating from you, my friend.
Anyhoodle, I’ll be back. I’m going to go over to some sports blogs and tell them that they’ve got some fucking nerve criticizing the performance of pro baseball players, when their performance is no better. So what if they’re not actually professional baseball players? It’s hypocritical, I tells ya!
andrewtna
This is a feature story. Sure, this sucks and is boring waste, but it’s just what her editor had in mind.
Molly
@eastriver: On behalf of many of us, and I can honestly say this is the first time I’ve ever posted this here…
Fuck you.
LD50
@Brachiator:
Um, is any explanation of what I ‘don’t get’ forthcoming?
eastriver
Redkitten, you called me sweetheart? Garsh. Next you’ll be discussing dick length and get yourself all hot and bother-ed.
“If you’re as delightful in real life as you are here, then at least something will be keeping you warm.” Perhaps you should type slower. You’re not making much sense.
Writing about writing is different than writing about something non-writing (baseball). Writing about writing is ironic in nature. Just like commenting about comments. Or snarking about snark.
I hope you were able to pick up some men in your sports blog tour. At least get some phone numbers. Or email addresses. Ya know.
Atanarjuat
By the way, John, this is my former neighborhood you’re massively dumping on.
The knee-jerk, sneering hatred “real” Americans have of us “coastal elites” is something I’ve encountered most of my life, but never really understood.
Maybe this is a topic you could blog about as a follow-up to this post, considering that you have little bit of that “coastal elites” hate going on, so you can write from experience.
And this is no fucking spoof.
Thanks.
-A
res ipsa loquitur
Please. That story is eons old. And it’s been told before.
Good thing the actual number of “coastal elites” is huge only in David Gregory & Co’s fevered imaginations.
General Winfield Stuck
@Molly:
…
The first time is always the best.:-)
Genine
Maybe I am having reading comprehension fail, but I don’t think this post is necessarily saying that fly-over country is right to hate the Coast. It think it’s referring to a certain subset of yuppies who seem to be well-meaning yet FOS.
And, Eastiver… really? Do you not have anything to do?
Xecky Gilchrist
@Brachiator: I’ve heard of King Taco – I need to get down that way and try them.
And I’ll swing by these guys’ original location while I’m down there – an old buddy lived near there and introduced me.
Genine
@Chad #95
Yeah, I know… I was trying to be nice. :-D
smiley
Excellent point (eyes roll).
RedKitten
@eastriver: I call people sweetheart when I dislike them. I would have thought you would have figured that out from the context, but evidently you’re not that swift. That’s okay — I’m sure you’re special in your very own way.
And writing about writing does not require that the former be a professional writer. Or, as Chad N Freude put it “there is a difference between a blogger posting about his pets and the NY Times giving space to a woman who feels so sorry for herself because her feel-good participation in a coop is so insufficiently appreciated that she has to eat yuppie chow to console herself.” And there is really no inherent hypocrisy in a hobby blogger thinking it’s beyond ridiculous for a major American newspaper to devote space to such a self-absorbed fluff piece.
And I have no desire to pick up men. It just goes to show how ugly-minded you are, when my remark about dick length was quite obviously facetious. I also mentioned the Chinese economy, but guess what? I’m not trolling the internet seeing if I can find some yuan. Heavens, it’s a good thing you weren’t around when we were all discussing teabaggers! You would have had quite the field day, wouldn’t you?
Phoenix Woman
Reminds me: I’m kicking around joining a CSA. Get good food at decent prices, support local farmers. Sounds good to me!
Brian J
Yes, and that extends, although to a lesser degree, to the greater metropolitan area (Westchester, Long Island, Connecticut, and so on). It’s a bit ridiculous and a little soul-killing, but it is what it is.
As for the whole coast versus heartland idea, I think this is overblown, too. But I will say that I always have to laugh when people act those who aren’t on the coasts are attacked by those who are. To me at least, it seems like most of the venom is coming from inside the country–from a minority of the people, no doubt, but people who are particularly nasty and throw around accusations that are one step away from calling someone a traitor.
AhabTRuler
Good god, Commissioner James Gordon is making a late break! Bitsy is still in the lead, but the Commish has managed to scare up a healthy supply of votes.
TenguPhule
Screw you, John. Get in line behind those of us who want the last 8 years back.
Mojotron
In the same vein, from today’s NYTimes sports section on NFL Week 7 Matchups:
what
John Cole
In my defense, I am kind of a jerk from time to time. Most of you should know that by now.
Cerberus
@LD50:
I’m not him, so I can’t really comment for him, but I would assume he was mostly commenting on the presumption that unemployed people have nothing but time (I think and I don’t really think you share that presumption yourself). That is, that since they’re not doing anything else, it’s easy to find the time to do the shift, when in actual fact, a shit-ton of time often gets eaten up frantically chasing random leads on jobs, searching for jobs, figuring out how to cover basic bills and potentially figuring out how to move to cheaper housing on the cheap.
Things like finding time for co-ops can therefore get shafted or be even harder to find time for than if one is “productive” and “employed”. I suspect it’s a reaction to the popular myth that unemployed people are lazy bums who sit around the house drinking beer.
Personally, I understand you weren’t actually believing any of that, but that you were commenting on the fact that it can become a priority to use the new flexible schedule to put in the small amount of time for drastically cheaper, healthier food that can spell the difference between eating and not eating that month.
@eastriver:
First, wow, there’s something really wrong with you. And you seem overly obsessed with our host and penises. Speaking as a member of the LGBT community, I would like to say that is perfectly acceptable to be who you are and instead of letting that self-hatred rip you up inside, you should come down to your local center and find a community that cares about you and loves you for who you are.
You’re welcome.
@ the post:
Ah, yippies.
Agree with others that it shouldn’t really be any different than the NASCAR obsession, but I think there’s this idea that health-conscious commie art stuff is inherently more expensive than mobile homes, fancy fishing equipment, and NASCAR tickets, thus the latter are proper “low-class” masculine activities versus the effete coastal feminine upper-class activities. Unfortunately the existence of yippies doesn’t help the case at just how woefully wrong that impression is.
@ burritos:
Philistines. A burrito is carne asada roasted with peppers and onions, topped with tomatoes, lettuce, rice, fresh guacamole, sour cream, refried beans or black beans with cheese, and swimming in a nice New Mexican chili sauce.
For vegetarians can also work without the meat, but then you should add more spanish rice. And it should always have some nice quantity of chili sauce or at least decent non-tabasco hot sauce. You don’t want it just hot, you want it flavorful.
@ her occupation:
Sigh. My partner is getting her MFA in Poetry.
I swear she’s less of a douchebag. But then I’m still boggling at how an MFA somehow is making enough regular money to be this alienated from genuine struggle enough to think this was a good column in a depression? And furthermore, can I get my partner a job there because as it is we’re planning to live in a step-up from a cardboard box for the next 50 years.
JGabriel
Brian J:
Zero steps, not one step. As one of those east-coasters, I can verify that members of the so-called heartland call us “traitors”, and many other things besides.
.
Cerberus
Huh, not exactly sure why my post got stuck in moderation as I don’t think I used any of the trigger words…very strange.
Hopefully John can rescue it someday.
smiley
@Mojotron: They’re writing for themselves and their friends, not their readers.
Fulcanelli
They hate us for our Freedom(TM). I though everybody knew this.
Chuck Butcher
Huh,
I’ve spent a week in FL for a wedding and a chance to see a son and now daughter in law. I’m not a real happy camper, I live at 3500′ elv in a 3500 sq mi county with a pop of 14,000 total and 10K of that in my home town where the avg humidity is 15%. Any time I drive there are more cars than I see in a day and the biggest hill is an overpass. It is warm, it isn’t very warm at home. I want to go home which I do Monday. I don’t feel superior, I’m uncomfortable and I’ve never been any good at being a tourist.
I’m not going to take this blog post any more seriously than it seemed to me its author, John Colem, took it. I find it very hard to take seriously someone who couldn’t make the time to put in the infitisimal hours required to stay in good standing or their ego about it. I find it considerably more difficult to take seriously anyone offended by it. I live in a hick town east of bum fuck Egypt and I don’t expect anybody to take that for more than it is and you don’t.
@eastriver: has a track record that makes him pretty hard to take at all seriously. I like a good slam as much as the next person, but some internal consistency is required to give it much bite and those are more appropriate to teen “cleverness” than biting. But everybody needs something to do, I guess. Nose picking would be more productive, but whatever…
Brick Oven Bill
Stuff White People Like. Written by an intelligent Ivy League Progressive named Chandler who sold out the movement.
Number Eight.
Read them all, if you’ve got some time.
Anne Laurie
@Violet:
I’m told that Oprah talks about her cocker spaniels almost as much as John talks about Lily. Oh, wait — did I just miss a Dr. Phil joke?
Fulcanelli
@TenguPhule: Step aside sonny, I want the last 28 back. And while we’re at it, let’s put Reagan, around the time of the ‘welfare queen’ kerfuffle, in a black Lincoln convertible driving through Harlem in broad daylight blasting some David Allen Coe.
Brachiator
@LD50:
Nope. I said what I wanted to say in my original posts. I had to step out for a while and, on returning, I find it more pleasurable to write about the glories of King Taco and other Los Angeles area eateries.
LD50
@Brick Oven Bill:
So that’s supposedly the ‘only reason’ I didn’t vote for McCain? Now it’s my turn to say it: FUCK YOU.
Violet
BITSY ALERT!
The other Pomeranian, Commisioner James Gordon, is catching up with Bitsy very rapidly.
Bitsy: 2041
CJG: 1783
Bitsy needs votes!
Cerberus
Well, while that marinates for awhile, I’ll add to the chorus on the hatred of the coasts. It is one of the greatest victories of advertising that many see Red State pursuits as “lower class” and thus “purer” and more “real” solely as an outgrowth of their masculinity and pretensions toward “redneck chic” and liberal coastal values as “upper class” and “privileged” solely as an outgrowth of their intellectualism, desires for equality, and “effete” qualities towards diversity and growth.
I mean, yes, the yippies don’t help, certainly not when they post their “harrowing” tales in the middle of a goddamn depression, but in general, it still boggles my mind.
Going to a poetry reading, an art show, a lebanese coffee house can usually be done under $20 and most fancy food options can be both cheaper and healthier than buying in a chain grocery store. When I was back in the states, I used to shop a lot in farmer’s markets and Trader Joe’s because I couldn’t afford to keep buying expensive crappy food at Ralph’s and Von’s.
Whereas the big mobile homes, hunting rifles, fishing equipment, and NASCAR tickets can easily run over my entire yearly budget for everything, much less luxuries alone.
But yet everyone believes it’s the opposite. Whoever started selling that myth is very good at their job, especially as it allowed the actual poor in the South to displace all their anger over pay inequality and predatory capitalism off the mansion buying faux rednecks in their own states towards those “uppity fake americans” on the coast.
Evil, but brilliant.
TenguPhule
I’d settle for all public johns be officially renamed Reagans.
Anne Laurie
With or without the Yankee fans?
Xecky Gilchrist
@Cerberus: Heh. I’ll own that I’m a burrito philistine. I picked up my appreciation for them when I couldn’t afford the good stuff – and these days, I’m back to where I can’t. Shrug.
TenguPhule
What do you have against cannibals?
LD50
@Brachiator: Fine, I’ll take that as a tacit admission that nothing I said in my posts was actually incorrect.
res ipsa loquitur
Do people really use the word “Yuppie” anymore without tongue firmly in cheek? I mean, it kind of went out circa 1989, right?
Cerberus
@Xecky Gilchrist:
Aww, sorry, didn’t mean it like that and my dad taught me how to make my own from scratch, so I don’t spend much money at all on them and it tends to be my main staple as you can stretch them out for a good couple of days and the sauce can last well over a week and be a flavorant for nearly anything (I like adding it to omelets for a nice breakfast treat). I only liked to tease on that, because I’m from SoCal trained by a guy who got REALLY into New Mexican cuisine to the point where I think he might actually be restaurant certified if he wanted to.
I think I might make another batch tomorrow for dinners this week.
Chuck Butcher
@res ipsa loquitur:
Well hell, Spiro Agnewisms still thrive and both of them have been maggot food for quite some time.
Cerberus
@Brick Oven Bill:
Someone apparently is NOT aware of all internet traditions.
Hint, this obviously contains no sarcasm in your world.
And LOL again. Seriously, it’s a hipster making fun of hipsters and commenting on the superficial interest of said hipsters in POC culture, how stupid do you have to be not to miss that?
Cerberus
Whoops, should be just “to miss that” at the end of my last post. Sorry.
Brick Oven Bill
Hardie Grant UK has just released Stuff White People Like: The Definitive Guide to the Unique Taste of Millions in the UK on Monday 5th October (Retail price £7.99). It is available from Waterstones, Borders and at Amazon.co.uk.
Also, Stuff White People Like author Christian Lander will be giving at talk at the London School of Economics
Title: STUFF WHITE PEOPLE LIKE – How to find social success with the urban-dwelling middle classes
Date and Time: Thursday 22nd October, 6.30pm
Never underestimate the willingness of the Progressive to sell out for cash. This is in contrast to Glenn Beck, who I am convinced is sincere in his Beliefs.
Glenn Beck makes money off of his books, but he does so in a manner that does not sell-out his ideals.
New Yorker
Yeah, people like the author of this article are why I occasionally decide that I’ve had enough of this town and will leave for a small city in a purple state with nice scenery (think Flagstaff, AZ).
Then I remind myself of all the reasons why I love New York despite these twits. It helps to live in an immigrant neighborhood, where most people are pretty down to earth and friendly.
Cerberus
@res ipsa loquitur:
Unfortunately, yuppie will live on as long as there are still god-damn yuppies. Lord knows I’d love to jettison it from the lexicon along with libertarian, but somehow, the complete collapse of the superficiality of their core philosophies seem to complete bypass its adherents.
Baffling.
TenguPhule
This is easy, because he doesn’t have any.
Tengphule -5 (knurd!)
Chuck Butcher
@Cerberus:
I may have comitted the unpardonable sin around here of not being much impressed with Cuban cuissine – particularly now being married into a Cuban family… well however that works at parents/groom – parents/bride relationship. Anybody know what that’s called??? Parents-in-law??
Cerberus
@Brick Oven Bill:
You’re embarrassing yourself.
Please god, google hipsters before I bust my appendix.
Cerberus
@Chuck Butcher:
Parents-in-law.
Xecky Gilchrist
@Cerberus: And I didn’t mean my response to sound like that. Apologies. I think I took your meaning right, just didn’t respond quite right.
Brick Oven Bill
Please Cerberus, the dog that guards hell, read Christian Lander’s work.
By the way, Dan Quayle is you daddy.
Cerberus
@Xecky Gilchrist:
It’s okay, I get naturally apologetic when people are deprived of good mexican food.
If I hadn’t brought a good stock of spices from home, I think I would have literally gone mad being here in Denmark so long. European fish dishes, pasta dishes, and killer breads are good and all, but sometimes you really need some good home cooking.
Chuck Butcher
Really, parents in law? Sounds like a sex crime or something, so what do you call your opposite number? Parent in law sounds kinda … stilted? I call him Gene but while I know my sisters actual name sometimes I call her Sis. Seems like a language as inventive as Amer-English would have done something about it. My wife knows my name but sometimes she calls me asshole…
slag
I have nothing to say here other than that John needs to keep posting about the dog. And, even better, the cat.
Also, yes, volunteer.
Cerberus
@Brick Oven Bill:
Snort. See, BOB, there’s a reason I stressed why you might wish to get to know ALL internet traditions, seeing as you, in your glee to “get” one on those mean old liberals who try and send you messages in your filings, missed a rather famous one, one well known on these here internets for awhile now.
Though I’m glad to see you’re at least consistent by combining it with your lack of knowledge of all literary traditions. Hint, open your easy-read version of Il Infierno (likely called The Inferno in your copy) and google the name of Dante’s spiritual guide and then ask someone smarter than you to explain why you’re such a moron.
Genine
What is that? Is that suppose to be an insult? If so, it’s funny. I still think you’re full if it, B O B. But that made me giggle.
Of course, if it’s an insult, it can only be effective against someone born before 1980. Luckily, that fits with the majority of people I have regular contact with.
Chuck Butcher
@Brick Oven Bill: Ah, BoB, we need to take up a collection to get you a flashlight so you can find your way back out. Too much Glenn is harming your brain cells and interfering with the space between the neurons. Put the book down and slowly back away – and have a piece of nice freshly baked pizza pie. You gotta try to relax a bit, mon. GWB put quite a ding in the nation but it took him 8 years after all. Surely Obama isn’t that much more competent to do so much in so little time…
Cerberus
@Chuck Butcher:
Oh, I think I may have misunderstood your question. Did you mean the name of your child’s spouse’s parents? Because I think that’s either a form of “brother/sister-in-law” or otherwise just one of those relationship types that don’t have an easy translation (in other words, it’d be something like my daughter-in-laws parents or as you say, Gene)
Though my parents are fond of “(partner’s name)’s rents” for the general extended family.
Chuck Butcher
@Cerberus: I suppose I’m just being what my wife sometimes calls me – asshole, or lately thupidhead (the lisp is difficult to properly render in print).
I have to be up in six hours to get my mother (82) to the Tampa airport to depart at 8AM for MI and my OR plane doesn’t leave until 6PM and this motel is 1 1/2 hrs or more (traffic) from the airport. I also am semi-adjusted from PDT to EDT. Monday is gonna be rough – I also have a 2 hr drive after arrival in Boise, ID at 12 MDT.
Brachiator
@geg6:
By the way, I hope that everything goes well.
Kat
Writing crap like this IS volunteering. It’s an advert for the coop.
Chuck Butcher
@Cerberus: Hmmm, Emilyrents… have to think on that one.
Cerberus
@Kat: She should have just helped with their twitter stream.
Just saying.
edsaid
I live in Kansas, the heart of flyover country. We have plenty of vacuous people here. Neither American coast has ownership of that attribute. Much of the comments and the original post are demonstrative of our American tendency to demonize “others”, i.e., people who live differently that we do.
Some people seem to recognize that everyone is free to make different choices in life and celebrate our differences and the rights we have that allow us this privilege. Others seem either overly proud of their life choices or extremely defensive about them and attack people who live differently. These attitudes persist whether you live in Nassau County, New York or Mule Shit, Mississippi. Neither geography nor income offer nobility. My wise old grandfather taught me that I am better than no one else and no one else is better than me.
Brachiator
@Xecky Gilchrist:
Oh yeah, Tommy’s is great. I admit though, that I can’t pack down double chili cheeseburgers like I used to.
But since we have moved beyond the burrito, I also recommend Philippe’s French Dip Restaurant in downtown Los Angeles. One of the fun things there is that you might find yourself sitting next to a homeless person or a deputy mayor. Don’t forget to try the spicy mustard.
There are also a number of great restaurants to be found within the Farmer’s Market in the Fairfax area.
For meat eaters, I particularly recommend the Pampas Grill. But watch out, they charge by the pound of meat on the plate.
elisathon
@Ned Ludd:
What Ned said.
Brachiator
@Cerberus:
Yep.
There ain’t nothin’ “New Mexican” in the neighborhood of an authentic burrito. I agree with you on the carne asada, though.
But hot is flavorful for a lot of Mexican food. Chili and chocolate, with a jalapeno pepper on the side. This is why the Deity invented beer, to go along with hot Mexican food.
Calming Influence
@Laura W:
Thanks, and sorry that I tootled off after I clicked ‘Submit’.
I freely admit that I’ve Ctrl-C/Ctrl-V ‘d a significant number of Balloon Juice comment threads to read on the airplane, because it’s some of the liveliest commentary in the blogoverse. I’m just worried that as this site becomes increasingly popular, John’s going to rename it “The Daily Co”.
Steeplejack
@geg6:
Sending healing energy to the poor dog.
Darkrose
@Zuzu’s Petals:
We really need to join. We’ve been trying to eat more organic stuff and generally eat more healthily, and every time we go into the coop we both say we should join, and then immediately forget. I didn’t realize that the $300 could be paid over time, though–that’s cool.
The only thing I don’t like about the coop here is that the parking sucks.
Stefan
The only thing that NYC has that we [Portland] don’t is a truly decent pizza (and self-absorbed journalists).
Oh, c’mon. Queens alone has every cuisine know to man in its various ethnic immigrant neighborhoods.
Discsmasher
Proud Park Slope Co-op member for 5 years chiming in here. The article was douchey, but (as mentioned above) that same complaint has been written dozens of times in various local and online publications that had nothing to do with red/blue coastal/flyover dichotomies.
If you can’t come up with the 3 hours a month in exchange for cheap quality food, STFU and go pay twice as much at Whole Foods or the corner minimart.
Gotta say I don’t ‘get’ the self-important complaints thrown at the co-op. Sure the assembly meetings are full of blowhards and wankers, but a) they’re optional and b) is that any different from city council or other community boards? The actual in-store behavior is far better than what I get when I venture into a Whole FairJoes.
jpe
What discsmasher said. I just moved into Park Slope and checked out the co-op, and what surprised me most was how pleasant and normal most of the people were. No one lying around in Gitmo orange, no silliness, just people shopping and doing their thing.
chopper
i’m a co-op member who’s been on suspension for some time, i gotta say that’s about the whiniest article i’ve read in some time.
Kobie
@Martin:
Yankee Stadium holds 50,086.
chopper
@Allen:
i’m a brooklynite and i’m pushing to move to P-town as soon as my wife’s coursework is over. even she, who really did have a love affair with NYC for a while, has lost it over this city.
somebody puked in her face on the subway last month and didn’t even apologize. that, to me, is NYC in a nutshell.
shep
Hope you caught this Perlstein gem as well:
http://digbysblog.blogspot.com/2009/10/bibamus-moriendum-est-by-digby-brad.html