JMart, who is apparently serving as Ben Smith’s stunt double, runs down the list of other things chief birther Orly (Yarly!) Taitz believes in:
There’s a cemetery somewhere in Arizona where they just dug 30,000 fresh graves, which wait now for the revolution.
Baxter International — a major Obama contributor — developed a vaccine for bird flu that actually kills people.
Google Congressman Alcee Hastings and House Bill 684 and you’ll see that they’re planning at least six civilian labor camps.
Google an article in the San Francisco Chronicle about train cars with shackles.
The communist dictator Hugo Chavez way back in 2004 purchased the Sequoia software that runs our voting machines and the mainstream media won’t report any of it — not even Fox because Saudi Arabia bought a percentage of Fox in 2007.
Death panels, socialism, labor camps- we really have let an insane minority take the national dialogue hostage.
Joshua Norton
She and Sister Sarah must shop at the same Meth lab.
Drugs are the only reasonable explanation that these people can formulate such nonsensical brain farts. Either they’re taking too many of the bad ones or not enough of the ones they really need.
DougJ
Good title.
smiley
My city counsel is working actively to resurface some roads! The roads! Where will it all stop!?
General Winfield Stuck
This seems a little low to me. We have a shitpot full of nutters in this country and shouldn’t have a labor camp gap.
Or, we could hand the overflow a spoon and send them to Alaska to drill baby drill, also.
Dreggas
@smiley:
next they’ll want to resurface faces and call it civic beautification!
beltane
Rupert Murdoch is being silenced by Hugo Chavez? When will Chavez force him to take Glenn Beck off the air?
Brian J
From a Business Week article that took about ten seconds to find using Google:
http://www.businessweek.com/magazine/content/06_23/b3987042.htm
MattF
I really think that Orly should not have stopped taking her medication.
General Winfield Stuck
Gimmee your brain, or the dialogue gets it.
demkat620
I’m sorry but I really am starting worry about how this ends. Talk radio keeps ramping this up, the media are treating this as if this is rational behavior and even the GOPers in Congress are going along.
How does this end?
freelancer
Love the second comment:
Rey
This woman is a whack job of the highest order.
Kyle
It’s like the Brigadoon of Stupid.
Joshua Norton
More pure gold:
The IBD has run a “retraction”:
“Editor’s Note: This version corrects the original editorial which implied that physicist Stephen Hawking, a professor at the University of Cambridge, did not live in the UK.”
Well, if by “implied” you mean “flat out saying it and being so wrong that you were the laughing stock of the entire internet”, then yeah, you implied the shite out of it.
freelancer
@demkat620:
With Rush Limbaugh found dead from choking on dijon-smeared arugala wearing four wetsuits and a snorkel with a tube on the end which circles around to his ass.
General Winfield Stuck
Dear Mr. Cole. I want to complain cause you used the S word and made my comment go away. It tain’t right, nottall.
d0n camillo
Why did we have to import Orly Taitz from Russia? Couldn’t the birthers find a native born American wingnut who was bugfuck insane enough to do the job? Orly is one of those immigrants who is stealing jobs from hard working Americans.
Veritas78
Okay, so now I want us to actually do some of this stuff.
Or at least we could play some great pranks.
General Winfield Stuck
nevermind
uila
I got to get my props. Cops
Come and try to snatch my schnapps
– O-Real
steve s
Alcee hastings’s phone number has 684 in it. The bill the moonbats are talking about is HR 645.
http://www.govtrack.us/congress/billtext.xpd?bill=h111-645
Ash Can
I’m just amazed that she’s not wandering some city’s streets in dirty clothes, with stringy, matted hair, carrying a bunch of plastic bags full of rags, alternately muttering and shouting at no one in particular. Seriously. I didn’t realize the actual scope of her mental illness.
I now truly feel sorry for her. The media people who have been encouraging and enabling and exploiting her should be ashamed of themselves.
cbear
@General Winfield Stuck: Show me the birth certificate or I’ll stick a bar-b-q fork in this puppy’s head. Also.
Litlebritdifrnt
Us Orly watchers over at PJ are convinced at this point that the good Dr. has been huffing nitrious, it is the only explanation for it. She has managed to weave every single conspiracy theory (except trufers, she hasn’t gone there yet) into a single one whereby Obama controls the entire UNIVERSE and has controlled the entire universe since he was just an egg, whereby he controlled his mother and forced her to have sex with some Kenyan guy in order to make him a half black, half white manchurian candidate 48 years later. I wish I was joking.
steve s
@Kyle: Yeah, except Brigaduumb only _dis_appears for one night every hundred years.
JK
Orly Taitz also believes that Paul McCartney is dead, Elvis Presley is alive, Queen Elizabeth is a drug dealer, Milli Vanilli did not lip synch, and that Craig Kilborn was a better host of the Daily Show than Jon Stewart.
Calouste
@freelancer:
I assume you mean four normal-sized wetsuits stitched together to form one Limbaugh-sized wetsuit. Limbaugh-sized wetsuits are hard to come by because the vast majority of that size segment prefers to go in the water without a wetsuit.
BombIranForChrist
We have a toxic loop in our country: Media loves sensationalism -> right wingers are sensationalist -> Media love sensationalism.
There is a direct tie between the media’s two week obsession with the death of Michael Jackson and this week’s events. If Obama wants to get someone’s attention, he is going to have to pull Bat Boy out of retirement.
And so we continue to swirl, around and around the toilet bowl of history.
Kirk Spencer
If I may kick Orly while she’s down… she can’t even get the talking points right. “Google Congressman Alcee Hastings and House Bill 684 and you’ll see that they’re planning at least six civilian labor camps.”
No, dear, it’s HR 645 (To direct the Secretary of Homeland Security to establish national emergency centers on military installations.) not HR 684 (Medicare Prescription Drug Savings and Choice Act of 2009.)
(And for the fun of it, the rest of this is section 3 of the bill – the critical meat)
(a) In General- Not later than 60 days after the date of the enactment of this Act, the Secretary of Homeland Security, in consultation with the Secretary of Defense, shall designate not fewer than 6 military installations as sites for the establishment of national emergency centers.
(b) Minimum Requirements- A site designated as a national emergency center shall be–
(1) capable of meeting for an extended period of time the housing, health, transportation, education, public works, humanitarian and other transition needs of a large number of individuals affected by an emergency or major disaster;
(2) environmentally safe and shall not pose a health risk to individuals who may use the center;
(3) capable of being scaled up or down to accommodate major disaster preparedness and response drills, operations, and procedures;
(4) capable of housing existing permanent structures necessary to meet training and first responders coordination requirements during nondisaster periods;
(5) capable of hosting the infrastructure necessary to rapidly adjust to temporary housing, medical, and humanitarian assistance needs;
(6) required to consist of a complete operations command center, including 2 state-of-the art command and control centers that will comprise a 24/7 operations watch center as follows:
(A) one of the command and control centers shall be in full ready mode; and
(B) the other shall be used daily for training; and
(7) easily accessible at all times and be able to facilitate handicapped and medical facilities, including during an emergency or major disaster.
(c) Location of National Emergency Centers- There shall be established not fewer than one national emergency center in each of the following areas:
(1) The area consisting of Federal Emergency Management Agency Regions I, II, and III.
(2) The area consisting of Federal Emergency Management Agency Region IV.
(3) The area consisting of Federal Emergency Management Agency Regions V and VII.
(4) The area consisting of Federal Emergency Management Agency Region VI.
(5) The area consisting of Federal Emergency Management Agency Regions VIII and X.
(6) The area consisting of Federal Emergency Management Agency Region IX.
Veritas78
So when her brain ‘splodes, will her wig contain the splatter?
I am certain that we can get her to bark like a dog.
Question: can we get her to eat her own s**t, on camera? Perhaps, if she thinks the government is tracking her precious bodily fluids, via that huge DNA database being collected via the internets. (Or did I say too much?)
beltane
@d0n camillo: Crazy talk sounds better in a foreign accent.
MattR
It may be way too obvious for Orly to grasp, but I am still a bit surprised that she has not announced her intentions to run for President in 2012. Or maybe she is waiting until her 15 minutes are closer to being over before she breaks out that card.
Demo Woman
The republicans appear to be throwing her under the train also. I guess the Birthers did not receive positive attention so now they are on to the deathers.
d0n camillo
Crazy talk sounds better in a foreign accent.
Works for Andrew Sullivan and Christopher Hitchens too.
freelancer
@MattR:
Alex Jones/Orly Taitz 2012
YA RLY!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZGFw3hY20lM
Their paranoia can only be outflanked by Palin/Bachmann.
JK
Orly Taitz – Dumber than dirt, slightly crazier than Sarah Palin
Terri
I’ve known shithouse rats who were more even keeled. Is there something in the metamucil that makes your synapses go haywire like this?
MattR
freelancer – but only 3 of those 4 are natural born citizens.
DonkeyKong
Don’t forget “Dogs and cats living together….mass hysteria!”
freelancer
@MattR:
No, dude, she’ll claim her Russian BC is a forgery.
JK
@freelancer:
John Ensign/Mark Sanford – Sleazy
Sarah Palin/Michele Bachman – Crazy
Alex Jones/Orly Taitz – Crazier
MattR
freelancer – Touche. I stand corrected.
srv
Wait, I found a flaw in our master plan. If we kill all the rich people, who is going to pay the higher taxes to subsidize our islamonazifascistmarxist fourth reich?
MattR
John Cole – you should probably change the link and attribution to point to the original source (John Richardson of Esquire) rather than Politico
Scott
Or at least we could play some great pranks.
Dear Dr. Taitz,
Enclosed please find this photo of Obama as a space alien, complete with deely-bop antenna, which I most certainly did not photoshop in a clumsy manner. I have also enclosed documents that demonstrate that he has Iraq’s WMDs, that he killed Vince Foster, and that he and the Servants of Cthulhu are using the Goldfish Fanciers and the Society for Creative Anarchism to control the FBI, using both the Principia Discordia and the Church of Elvis.
Help me, Orly Taitz, you’re my only hope.
Blue Shark
Oily Titz is not that far off with the Voting Software.
…an it ain’t that funny.
JK
Orly Taitz is a prankster. In reality, she’s an unemployed actress who dreamed up this persona to get attention and punk the media.
freelancer
@srv:
We’re gonna melt down all the guns Obama confiscates. Precious metals. Shhhhh.
MattR
JK – Someone on the Politico comment thread posited that Orly Taitz is actually Sacha Baron Cohen’s next movie.
Blue Raven
@srv:
Citizen, we will acquire their assets and use THOSE.
JK
@MattR:
I’m inclined to agree. Orly is too over the top. This has to be an elaborate prank.
freelancer
via The Dish’s Face of the Day:
Shorter, Quieter Wingnut: Not by the hair of my double-chin-chin!
http://cheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=4937818
Dreggas
@Litlebritdifrnt:
Well of course she hasn’t added anything from the trufers yet that’s because it is plainly obvious to anyone paying attention. See Osama planned 9-11 in cohoots with George bush and Dick Cheney just so they could fuck things up so bad that we’d elect a black islamo-fascist-maybe-kenyan as president. Yes Bush was in on it too!
scarpy
Oh my god, my former roommate (a radical leftist) was convinced Bush was doing the train-cars-with-shackles thing in 2006. She had some count, too, like there were thousands upon thousands of these things — enough that they would take up almost 800 miles of rail space.
Anyway, apparently it was a meme that wingnuts started about Clinton, then got handed off to moonbats under Bush, and now I guess has come back home.
Leelee for Obama
@Dreggas: Sadly, this could get traction-what the hell is in the water, and why do people insist on drinking it unfiltered?
shelley matheis
WOW! Her tin hat needs could re-invigorate the aluminum foil industry. Paging Mr. Alcoa!
Tax Analyst
srv said:
“30,000 fresh graves
Wait, I found a flaw in our master plan. If we kill all the rich people, who is going to pay the higher taxes to subsidize our islamonazifascistmarxist fourth reich?”
Shit, that’s EASY. Before we kill the rich we waterborrd them to make ’em tell us waire all ther golden geeses are statcshed. Not beeying dumm, we make shur tehy ain’t lyun ferrst, but wunsce wea’ve got dem geesies in our cornsfriscaturry so’syourlisp clutches, well, DEN we kill dem. Once we have dem golden goosies we jest slit derr abb-abb-abbda…uh, gutz opan ann hall out all dose goalldin bars so’s we ken pay fur teh Obbamma-Nazi Hellth & Youth-in-Asia Plan, so’s we ken kill all teh grannies, cuz udderwize we kent affurd it.
An dat’s wat dose 30,000 graves’es is fur. Dedd grannies so’s we ken affurd hellth caire. Itz jest simpull lawgic, duede.
ominira
@d0n camillo:
Moldova. Taitz was born in Moldova. The most interesting Moldovan import to the US (alcohol being a close second).
SiubhanDuinne
@ JK and MattR
Yes, I said the same thing to my carpool partner a few weeks ago, whenever it was we first started being aware of Oily. I still think she’s laughing and laughing once the cameras are turned off, and that 18 months from now a whole bunch of people will flock to the moom pitcher show to laugh and laugh right along with her at how everyone was taken in.
superking
Um, about Venezuela and voting machines, that’s kind of true, but in the way she’s suggesting:
http://www.mcclatchydc.com/226/story/64711.html
The CIA believes that Chavez used electronic voting machines to manipulate the vote in his 2004 re-election. Some of these same machines are used in the US. Ultimately, this is just a little more evidence against electronic voting machines that don’t have voter verified paper trails.
Poopyman
It’s only in the national dialog because the fricking media repeats it over and over.
Funny, I don’t remember them doing this with Weekly World News headlines.
MattR
SiubhanDuinne – Does your user ID have some hidden meaning if I view it upside down through a mirror while covering one eye? Or does it just look like it should? Am I the first person to ask that or are there other weirdos like me out there?
kommrade reproductive vigor
The creepy thing is this woman is a dentist. Can you imagine letting this schiz into your MOUTH?
God, that sounds even worse than I meant.
Makewi
So who keeps giving her the microphone and why? As poopyman points out, lots of crazy shit is believed so why does this get reported so often? Perhaps it’s to help you write posts about how fucking crazy those stupid wingnuts are.
It’s funny because I remember when you weren’t so partisan, when you realized that crazy wasn’t plotted as a particular point on the political spectrum. It must be that everyone around you changed.
NeenerNeener
Litlebritdfrnt @24: that’s what driftglass refers to as a “Quantum Freep”.
Comrade Darkness
There’s a cemetery somewhere in Arizona where they just dug 30,000 fresh graves, which wait now for the revolution.
Aye what a dipshit. Quick math here. Fatality rate in Arizona is 724 per 100,000 (statistical year 2006). That’s 43,440 deaths per year. Given the bulge in retiree population (a critical Arizona economic sector) coming through the pike, I’m going to guess those graves are going to fill without the revolution.
They must not teach arithmetic in Moldovia. If she were Russian her math would be on straight, at least.
And really, no one planning a revolution plans a neat burial of their enemies where they can be dug up and investigated by a later regime. They launch them into space, like all decent revolutionaries. With the Fluoride supply that was intended for the city water. Sheesh woman. Keep your shit straight or get out of the freakazoid business.
Meanderthal
And he dropped a Plot card to get +10 on his attack to control! That bastard.
Church Lady
Is Orly Taitz a United States citizen? I thought she was from Israel. Does she actually have a license to practice law anywhere in the States? If she does, I’m wondering how in the hell she ever passed a bar exam.
Andy K
@Church Lady:
She’s been the property of three teams. She was in the Soviet farm system, but left via the Rule 5 draft for Israel, from where she was sent to the US as the “player to be named later” in the USS Liberty deal.
El Cid
Why is everyone pretty much forgetting how crazy it was during the Clinton era?
There’s nothing, nothing in the above quote that is one tiny bit crazier than what was being screamed on right wing radio and survivalist and militia radio and bulletin boards and newsletter and videos (“Clinton Chronicles”) during the Clinton era — and hardly anyone paid attention to any of the alerts raised until Tim McVeigh blew up the Murrah federal bldg in Oklahoma City.
There is nothing, nothing, nothing going on now which is crazier than during the Clinton era in substance — what may be new is the form, and not just internet usage, but the ‘screaming at town halls’ thing.
But that’s about it. I’m sick and tired of how absolutely blank the establishment media is being about this. ALL of this shit went on in the Clinton era.
Clinton body count, black helicopters, bar codes on the backs of stop signs leading to a Hillary Clinton-UN-Russia invasion (you know, ’cause without sign barcodes they couldn’t have navigated around), FEMA camps…
Let me remind you of something.
This woman is still making the circuits. She made a good living during the Clinton era.
Last I heard of her bullshit super-crazy routine was on the Stephanie Miller Show when Roseanne Barr started talking about this crazy lying lady’s bullshit.
There is nothing, nothing, nothing going on crazier now than then. Bigger in extent and visibility now, but then, nobody’s yet blown up a federal building, and hopefully they won’t.
Comrade Kevin
@MattR: It’s Gaelic. Other than that, I’ll let Siubhan explain.
Calliope
ominira @ 58:
Moldova was part of the Soviet Union until 1991. Taitz was born in 1962, and immigrated to Israel in 1981. She never lived in an independent Moldova.
Lisa K.
He is wrong to equate liberal writers like Katha Pollitt and Naomi Wolf to Rush Limbaugh. Those on the left, the 9/11 conspirators notwithstanding (a fair amount of whom are also extreme libertarian, and never made it into the mainstream) were incensed with George Bush and his administration because he lied about WMD in order to justify a long-ago-decided-upon war that has killed thousands of Americans and hundreds of thousands of Iraqis, using torture along the way. While the language may be extreme, so was the provocation. I don’t think you can honestly compare that to crackpots like Orly Taitz and the birthers/deathers, who are essentially frustrated at the changing demographics of the country, furious that a man of color with an unusual name and background is in the White House.
Hardly the same thing. Very lazy comparison to say the least.
KaffeeMeister
I worry that all this batshit crazy stuff popping up, is actually a longer term Rethuglican plan. They are desensitizing the media and the more gullible Americans.
After 4 to 8 years of this constant stream of craziness, at some point the the Thugs may eventually get returned to control of the country, they actually be able to DO the stuff that they are projecting currently, because no one “really” believes it.
Think of how close the shrub was — they were convinced early on that they had a “permanent rethuglican majority”, meaning they knew they could get away with murder. When we see how much corruption occurred with no one able to in investigate I’d say the Republic dodged a coup.
Can you imagine McCain/Palin waltzing into office under these circumstances? Oh the HORROR!