Oh no! Census workers! Run for your lives:
In an interview with the Washington Time’s right-wing radio show this morning, Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN) declared that she would break the law and refuse to answer the Census questions, beyond noting the number of people in her household…
Bachmann explained that her fears over the Census were in large part due to the fact that her Number-One Enemy, ACORN, could possibly be involved. (The group might help recruit some of the 1.4 million people needed to go door-to-door to count every American.) She insinuated that former senator Norm Coleman (R-MN) had lost his reelection bid because of “fraudulent votes” perpetrated by ACORN.
And the wingnut hit parade keeps chugging along, with rubber chickens and big red noses and stuffed clown cars as far as the eye can see.
gex
It is time for a Tunch and Lily thread.
Martin
I propose a bill be introduced in Congress than anyone who makes a derogatory statement about the census or ACORN be immediately drafted by the US government to participate in the 2010 Census recount. They will be released from their service when they have visited all 110 million households in America. Michelle Bachmann will organize the effort personally.
Wag
I love michelle!
Comrade Stuck
Wha… she didn’t accuse ACORN of causing the Iranian crisis?
sluggahjells
More comedic genius from her
Aqualad08
She truly is the goose that lays the golden eggs…if we were to kick her out of office, the eggs would go away…
A Mom Anon
One would think they’d want to participate in the census to keep those numbers of white folks nice and accurate. How does this hurt liberals? (since that seems to be the goal no matter what the occasion)
Honest to god,it’s wonder any of these people can dress themselves and leave the house in the morning. I’ve known kindergarteners who are less scared of everything and more responsible than these nitwits.
Bubblegum Tate
Next step: Michele Bachmann vows to hurl rotten eggs at U.S. postal workers who try to deliver that commie ACORN propaganda they call “mail.”
Napoleon
@Aqualad08:
She was one person that I really wanted to see lose last time, but after the last few months I have reconsidered and now think that the DCCC should do everything to make sure she stays in Congress. She is pure gold for the Democrats.
comrade scott's agenda of rage
Does this mean when she breaks the law, we can arrest her? put her in a cell next to Cold Cash Jefferson.
TR
It’d be great if all of Bachmann’s constituents refused to answer any questions for the Census, including — especially — the number of people in their homes.
If her plan works, the population count for her district will plummet and the congressional districting will be redone in a way that wipes her base off the map.
Brilliant as ever, Michelle.
comrade scott's agenda of rage
Or as we used to say about Katherine Harris over at Teh Orange:
Pure. Comedy. Gold.
OTOH, after reading the linked piece on “The Movement”, I’m not so sure keeping her in the public eye is a good thing. The only way she’ll get tossed out of Congress barring a sex or bribery scandal will be to gerrymander her sorry ass out of existence.
steve s
Grammar Fail
Dave Dial
Holy Crap!
Priceless.
asiangrrlMN
Aaaaaaaaargh! Did you know that she is not ruling out running for governor of my fair state? If God calls upon her, she will do it.
Aaaaaaaargh!
I gotta say, if I ever ran into her on the streets, well, I would literally run into her on the streets. She makes Sarah Palin look smart. Also.
Ok. I don’t live in her district, but I gotta find a way to get her out of there next time around.
Hey, Michele, if you’re going to break the law, at least be smart enough not to SAY you’re going to break it.
Bootlegger
How many of them fit in a clown car? That’s always my favorite part of the circus, counting how many clowns they fit in that tiny little car.
Napoleon
@comrade scott’s agenda of rage:
Why? The more she is on TV and the average voter sees her as what passes for a Republican who acts as a spokesperson for her party, the more likely people in the middle of the electorate will not take the Republican Party seriously.
The Grand Panjandrum
Unfuckingspoofable.
Calouste
@asiangrrlMN:
Is Bachmann going toe-to-toe with Hoekstra in the GOP governor primary? I think we will have to invent new numbers just to measure the wingularity index if that happens.
SpotWeld
Has she also reccomended that they should hold their breath and turn blue until they all get a tax cut for the wealthy?
jibeaux
So she is boycotting Census questions because ACORN might come door to door?
Am I wrong, or isn’t it that they mail you the census survey, and if you complete it and mail it back, that no one comes to your door to bug you? So if you fear teh acorn has infilmitrated teh gubmint, wouldn’t the best thing to do be to mail back the census and bypass the election-rigging, door-knocking, illegal commies? Am I missing something here, such as paranoid schizophrenia?
freelancer
I wonder if Michelle went all lone-wolf and broke out the fava beans and a nice chianti.
Comrade Kevin
@Calouste: They’re from different states.
djork
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N1KvgtEnABY
Emma Anne
It is funny, except I am starting to worry about those census workers. They go door to door with the protection provided by a clipboard, right? Do they go in pairs? I can seriously see wingnuts attacking census workers after being told they are evil minions of ACORN.
Calouste
@Comrade Kevin:
Yeah, Minnesota and Michigan. Sorry. What a pity. It would have been a spectacle.
asiangrrlMN
@Comrade Kevin: Thank god for that. Otherwise, I would probably die from a burst blood vessel in my temple.
@jibeaux: Shh, shhh, don’t try to confuse the poor thing with facts.
Calouste, funny for those on the outside! I have enough on my plate dealing with Ratface Pawlenty and his fucking unallotment, wingnutty Bachmann and her evident psychosis, plus prima donna Bret Favre and his threats to become a Viking. The LAST thing I need is a Hoekstra-Bachmann throw-down.
The Saff
@asiangrrlMN:
It’s bad enough you guys have only one senator since Norm doesn’t want to face reality and concede to Al Franken. And now this? I would have the same reaction as you.
BFR
Did she just admit that Coleman in fact LOST the election?
Tsulagi
If there were a God, it would be Palin/Bachmann 2012. Or Bachmann/Palin. They can take turns being on top.
Common Sense
Look into the GOP primaries in Georgia and Texas for true wingnut hilarity. There are those who actually believe Rick Perry is too damn liberal.
‘Course, Texas is probably going to end up with Hutchinson in the end, who is in my eyes a mild improvement over Perry at least.
The Moar You Know
This woman is bringing down the median IQ of a nation of 300 million people.
Impressive.
Little Dreamer
Speaking of Coleman, is he still receiving all those spiffy benefits that a senator gets? Hmmmm.
asiangrrlMN
@The Saff: Yes. Apparently, both Normie and Franken flew to DC from MN (on the same flight). Normie rode first class and Al rode coach. That pretty much sums it up.
@BFR: No, it was stolen because, um, ACORN!
@Tsulagi: If this happens, I don’t know what I will do. Really.
In addition, Ratface is being touted as a moderate Republican and as a sleeper candidate for 2012. I want to shoot myself in the face. Dick? Can you help me out?
ninerdave
I think Rich Lowry just had an orgasm.
The Moar You Know
@BFR: Being normal, you missed the dogwhistle. There’s a huge difference between “lost” and “stolen by Gay Black Stormtrooper Commiefascist Panthers”.
Napoleon
OT, but has anyone noticed that a bunch of political websites on the left have been down all or part of the day since the morning and WM blog, which is now back up, is reporting they suffered an attack.
The Saff
Right. I saw that earlier. Any idea when the MN Supreme Court is supposed to decide this thing? If I lived in MN, I would be livid. I mean, I’m irritated anyhow because I donated several times last year to Franken’s campaign — he should be seated.
asiangrrlMN
@Little Dreamer: I don’t know about benefits, but he’s not receiving a salary any more.
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/04/15/us/politics/15minn.html
Now, he’s working as a consultant to the Republican Jewish Coalition. This piece is overly sympathetic to him, but eh.
Quaker in a Basement
The MN senate fiasco has become “Mr. Smith Goes to Washington” meets “The Terminal.”
blogenfreude
@Aqualad08: Santorum got kicked out of office, and he still lays plenty of ’em. He, Tancredo, Joe the Plumber – they’ll NEVER go away.
camchuck
That reminds me. IIRC, Bachmann is scheduled for my local wingnut radio show at 4:30 today. Gonna miss it, though. 1600 AM in Ann Arbor if anyone has the stomach.
asiangrrlMN
@Napoleon: Yeah, I noticed a slowness all around. Hmm…..
@The Saff: Have NO idea. They started taking testimony the first of June (a month later!), and by all accounts, Normie is going to lose. Then, of course, he will take it to the US Supreme Court.
I feel utterly ripped off and helpless in this ongoing drama.
Shinobi
I can see the analysis now:
Due to the voluntary exclusion of the Bachmanites, (A name coined in 2009 for the 313 people on planet earth willing to take Michelle Bachman seriously) the Census estimate of the average IQ of US Citizens increased by 10 points.
Comrade Darkness
@Napoleon: Calculated risk has been down all day. Bugger making me get some work done. What is the world coming to?
Punchy
I have to disagree.
And why is “Census” considered a proper noun requiring a capital?
Avi
@Emma Anne: Given the general bad attitude of wingnuts toward Census workers a couple of months ago, when they were just updating the address list and maps, I dread next year.
Perhaps Bachmann and her ilk would prefer that we go back to the 1790 rules, in which the Census was run by federal marshals; the enumerators got to keep half the non-response fines; and the data were posted in the town square for everyone to review. And even back then, the numbers were broken down by race, sex, and age (and free/slave); today, we do the same and not much else, just with more precision.
As for Bachmann, there’s one crazy anti-Census congresscritter each decade. In 2000, it was Tom Coburn, and—wait for it—OK lost a House seat. I thought this year’s was going to be Patrick McHenry (NC-10), but I’m not exactly surprised by this development.
RareSanity
@asiangrrlMN:
Now that made me laugh. Thank you!
After the Michael Vick debacle we went through here in Atlanta, if I were a Viking fan, I would rather take my chances with Tavaris Jackson than deal with the tsunami of drama that diva is going to bring to town.
Wait for the season ending “injury” right after they play @Green Bay, because we all know that is what it is all about.
gbear
He must be. By chance, both Coleman and Franken ended up on the same flight to DC recently. Franken flew in coach. Coleman was in first class.
I am so sick of Bachman. She’s like a ‘Half Hour News’ version of Spinal Tap.
note to self: read all comments before commenting. duh
D-Chance.
OK, Sully has officially lost it. Comparing the Iranian revolt to the Selma riots, MLK, and Ghandi???
He DOES realize that Ahmadinejad and ALL of his opponents were vetted and approved by the same Islamic Council? That Mousavi will continue the execution of homosexuals, and the subjugation of women and other minorities?
They aren’t razing the house over there… they’re arguing over which color of paint to apply to the existing one.
asiangrrlMN
@RareSanity: Or for the season to end with an interception thrown by Favre. “He loves the game.” Yeah, well the game doesn’t love him any more. STAY RETIRED!
@gbear: No, that’s just the money that has been illegally steered into his and his wife’s coffers.
I think most Minnesotans are tired of Bachmann, except those who voted for her.
jake 4 that 1
Oh goodie! I hope she stays in office long enough to explain why her district didn’t get the new schools, roads and other essential services it needs.
pseudonymous in nc
She should tell all of her supporters in MN-6 to hide from the Census people: with hope, she’ll end up getting redistricted out of the House. (On edit: ah, I see I was beaten to it.)
Hers is a weird district. Lots of McMansion suburbs of the Twin Cities, stretching out to the weird, wild country.
freelancer
@ D-Chance, RE: Sullivan
I emailed this very point to Sully after his post earlier this morning.
I want the Green Revolution to be successful. However, even given the occurrence of one of the best-case scenarios, for instance perhaps one of the dissenting Ayatollah’s stepping into power as a new Supreme Leader with the blessing of the people and the military, Iran will still be known as the Islamic Republic of Iran. A Theocracy is still a theocracy, whether they have Web 2.0, CNN, and the new Terminator movie, or not. Is it possible for any secular advocates to promote a separation of Mosque and State in Iran? If not now, will it, could it be possible after a successful Green Revolution? Is it likely that a reformist Ayatollah appointed to Supreme Leader would rescind the fatwa ordering the murder of writer Salman Rushdie for apostasy?
I think Islam in this instance is more of a communal tool that can be used by the protesters to show solidarity and retain the populist sentiment of the 1979 Revolution as a reflection of the actual will of the people. However, I don’t think Hitch’s claim needs any footnotes or an asterisk. The issues are separate. A reformed Iran might be more free than in its current state, but true freedom is bolstered by recognizable as open and secularized democracy. Authoritarianism, whether that takes the form of a “benevolent” dictator, monarchy, or priestly hierarchy will never cede power or influence on an even battlefield of ideas, and will continually resist Enlightenment values of free speech, free press, and free religion. However good the change in Iran may be, Mousawi is not Jefferson, Madison, Adams, or Washington.
Llelldorin
On the plus side, if Bachmannism results in a huge statistical undercount of wingnuts, it’ll be funny watching the NewThink kick in as they suddenly discover that they’ve always favored statistical sampling techniques in the census.
Cyrus
@Emma Anne:
ACORN should make its people wear a uniform of a white button-down shirt, short-sleeved if weather permits, with black pants. Formal but not intimidating. And they should go in pairs if possible, for security. And their pamphlets should be smaller than the usual government-issue booklet, for easier reading, with lots of pictures of sunrises on them.
JR
Then what is she doing in CONGRESS, which everyone in their right mind knows is controlled by a cabal of the Illuminati, ACORN, teh jooz, and secret radical muslims like Imam Steny Mohammed Hoyer.
freelancer
You forgot black ties, black backpacks, and ten-speed bikes.
JR
@Cyrus: Sometimes it’s tough to tell if someone’s making a joke about the Mormons or about Geek Squad.
Zach
If the Republicans weren’t so scared of employing statistical modeling in getting a better census, they could abstain without fear and we’d just add them back in.
gnomedad
Answering census questions is fascistic, kinda like paying taxes and requiring
school children to pledge allegianceregistration of guns.Cyrus
@JR: Heh, I hadn’t thought of the Geek Squad, and the pamphlets with sunrises should have tipped the scales to the Mormons anyway, I think.
Zuzu's Petals
@gbear:
I don’t see how Coleman could still be getting benefits if he’s no longer a Senator. Under the Twentieth Amendment, senate terms end at noon on the January 3 after the election.
demkat620
I hate to tell Michelle, but how many people live in her household, is all the census really wants to know. That’s not breaking the law to refuse to answer any other questions.
ET
Michelle should have had a staffer look at what Census is doing for the decennial generally and how it relates to redistricting and the 2010 Census in particular. If they had, they would have discovered that there is no longer going to be a long form (where the socio-economic data is). It is only a short form name, sex, age, date of birth, race, ethnicity, relationship and housing tenure which has been part of Census for decades (and in some cases since the beginning). The data on the long form is going to be collected via the American Community Survey which is run by Census but totally separate. She better hope people who were listening ignore her our she could be redistricted out of a job and her constituents could loose out on federal dollars.
Mister Papercut
Michele Bachman is the best character Sacha Baron Cohen has yet to do.
Tax Analyst
Yes, everyone knows what a violent, uncontrolled bunch those Acorner’s are. Why just thinking about that poor doctor in Kansas, and the guard at the Tolerance Museum and the cops in Pittsburgh makes my…wait a minute…no Acorner’s were involved in any of that…uh…wasn’t it unhinged right-wingers and/or paranoid gun nuts?
Well, at any rate, it’s probably a good thing the Bachmann has turned into overdrive and decided to take care of business.
We probably ain’t seen nuth-nuth-nuthin’ yet.
Damned at Random
Wing Nut Daily has been on top of this. I sent the following to Conspiracy Theorists Say the Darndest Things last month:
When the nice census lady came to our door with her GPS device, I immediately had a pretty good idea why. The most serious and widespread mental illness in America today is the failure to be paranoid. Fortunately, I don’t suffer from this affliction. I know perfectly well that they are out to get me…and everyone else as well.
I assumed that semiliterate ACORN thugs with rudimentary weapons training could use this to find my front door, where I can give them the proper welcome, for which I am always prepared. More seriously, precision guided munitions could now kill my wife and myself. There are even guided artillery shells now, so a relatively small number of soldiers in each city could kill hundreds of patriots.
http://www.fstdt.net/QuoteComment.aspx?QID=62108
Llelldorin
If anything like that happens, many, many conservatives will abruptly appear on every Sunday political program and begin loudly demanding that they be shown where the Constitution demands an actual headcount, and decrying liberals for blocking the statistical sampling techniques which conservatives have always supported.
The absurdity will be noted precisely nowhere on-air, since that would be partisan.
HyperIon
@The Moar You Know:
Hmmm, i guess you mean “mean IQ”.
Otherwise, you do not understand what “median” means. ;+0
asiangrrlMN
Oh, hallelujah. I hope to FSM this is true:
http://www.usnews.com/articles/opinion/mashek/2009/06/16/franken-finally-nearing-victory-over-coleman-in-minnesota-senate-race.html
h/t, Washington Monthly. Although, the admonishment to Bachmann not to act bat-shit crazy is absurd. She has no other way of being.
The Very Reverend Battleaxe of Knowledge
@freelancer:
Very true. However, he could be Pascal Paoli. The Corsican Republic was a tremendous inspiration for opponents of monarchy in Europe and the American Founding Fathers, even though its constitution made the Head of State “The Virgin Mary.”
This seems to have been forgotten now, and of course, the main contribution of the Corsican Republic to world culture was the Bonaparte family, but still…. Iran will be an “Islamic Republic” for the foreseeable future. But even if this revolution is put down, it could be as much of an inspiration to democratic movements elsewhere in the Moslem World as Corsica was to the West. Let’s just hope the U.S. doesn’t play the role of France in this scenario.
asiangrrlMN
@JR: I thought Geek Squad, too.
@Zuzu’s Petals: He doesn’t get his salary, but he still will get health benefits, yes? I am not sure about this. It doesn’t matter. He has donors who are quite willing to put him up.
Brian J
If Ms. Bachmann has some information about voter fraud, why hasn’t she shared it with any authorities? If this alleged fraud was enough to make a difference in the margin of Franken’s victory, it’s astonishing that she hasn’t mentioned this to the police, the RNC, or anyone associated with Norm Coleman’s campaign.
Or maybe she’s just full of it. Nah, that couldn’t be it, right?
Ash
I’m honestly just waiting for the report to come out of the first census worker to be shot.
It’s basically a given at this point.
demkat620
@Ash: I personally know one who was threatened with an axe in 2000.
mclaren
Seriously — this is just a flashback to the early 1960s. Back then the John Birchers were saying everything the mainstream Republicans are saying now. None of this is new, it’s just come out of the closet and taken over the Republican party.
binzinerator
Although this is hilarious and we see that Bachmann’s stupidity is apparently limitless, I’m also noting the right wing paranoia is spreading and going mainstream.
Is there no one on the right who isn’t echoing and boosting the paranoia and resentment and baseless fear that used to be the hallmark of the fringe right? What is the end-game of this? What is Bachmann trying to do? The woman may seem stupid but I think she is not unintelligent.
Conservatives. They fuck up the country with their idiocy and their criminal acts, always waving the flag around, bellowing how much they love democracy, and God Bless Our Nation and how wonderful and great our Freedoms are, and other peoples in other nations should have the same democracy rammed up their ass with a gun barrel if necessary because ours is so jesus-god-and-flag fucking GREAT.
And then they get their ass handed to them in one of those necessary expressions of democracy, an election.
And they go fucking nuts —
And they shriek the Pres is the antichrist, a false prophet, a fascist, a socialist, a terrorist symp, a communist, HES NOT A US CITIZEN. They repeat it on tv, on the airwaves, on the internet, in print and even on bizarre billboards.
It doesn’t matter if there is no context, no explanation. Repeat the lie often enough, in enough places, and the public will begin to think there’s a truth behind it. (The absurdity of enigmatic billboards actually serves to make it more valid. State it as if it were self-evident. After all, truth does not need to be contextualized, right?)
And they talk of sedition, of overthrowing the government, of refusing to obey the laws they don’t like, of revolution, of treason, of wanting the President to fail, of hoping someone “will bring an end” to him.
So Bachmann’s tells us she’s going to break the law because she’s decided one of the key means to maintaining a representative democracy — knowing how many people there are — can no longer be trusted. This is, it is no longer legitimate.
If the census is no longer legitimate what does that imply for the legitimacy of the democracy? If you can undermine the tools and methods used to determine representation, you undermine the legitimacy of the democracy.
Fuck Bachmann. She knows what she’s after. She knows how to manipulate the conservative base. And it’s not stupidity. It’s evil.
And fuck every goddamned conservative who spent the last 8 years spittle-flecking the rest of the nation about how fucking great democracy is, and how elections have consequences, and how in a time of war you must support the President or you’re a traitor.
Fuck these people who when they won bragged and strutted around and spewed contempt for the minority as if the virtue of winning graciously was contemptible and who tolerated no dissent or questioning; and how they then refused to agree to the outcome, refused to accept the winner, refused the will of the majority, refused to follow the law when they didn’t win.
Yes Bachmann is insisting she’ll cut her nose off to spite her face but she’s only repeating a message. She’s echoing and reinforcing the same message we’ve heard from conservatives since Obama was elected. It’s endlessly repeated and riffed-on, and the core message is for conservatives to refuse to accept the one thing without which democracy cannot work — it is an exhortation to refuse to accept the will and the legitimacy of the majority when they are not the majority.
It is a massive and coordinated effort, conveyed using a variety of media and emitted and re-emitted by a variety of figures and repeated in many variations and always seeking to arouse fear, to undermine or destroy the legitimacy of this particular democratically elected government.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, conservatives do not believe in democracy.
Mike Conwell
My wife worked for the Census Bureau for a short time this Spring and I spent the entire time worrying about her encountering nut jobs spurred on by Rep Michelle Bachman and Republicans in the past (including candidate for president, Gov George W Bush (idiot-TX))
We listened to this threatening language in 2000, and looks like we’re doomed to hear it again in 2010. And Michelle is just getting the ball rolling a bit early.
Anne Laurie
That’s part of the problem — we keep forgetting that stupidity is contagious.
Lesley
A person who has no clue what the Census is about has no business running for ANY office.
John T
With unemployment so high, does the census need help from ACORN or anybody else recruiting workers to go door-to-door? The feds could put up a help wanted ad on Craigslist and get millions of responses overnight.
Cain
@jibeaux:
I think it depends. Our house (not us) was picked for the U.S. Census for I guess spending habits. We get asked all kinds of stuff about how much we spend on things and what not. The lady is so nice too… she’s going to babysit our cats later in the year! :-)
cain
Cain
@D-Chance.:
It is spelled ‘Gandhi’. Thanks.
cain
Michael
I agree with the suggestion that all congressmen be required to wear NASCAR type outfits so we will know who their corporate sponsors are!!