I told you all that you would get a chance to see what I looked like in a Halloween costume, and, as promised, here you go:
Me as a hobo.
by John Cole| 62 Comments
This post is in: Open Threads
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[…] John Cole lets people see pictures of mine dressed up on Halloween. […]
yet another jeff
Oh sure, mock the homeless…
garbo
Um, dude, what’s in your left hand??
Zifnab
Don’t worry. Those will be all the rage in a few months.
Krista
I like how your bindle matches your bowtie. That’s some nice colour coordination.
What was that thing in your left hand? A stick for keeping away the railroad bulls?
jakester
Okay, that’s cute, but show us one from when you were a kid!
Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse
You’re right. You do look a hell of a lot like Jim Gaffigan.
MikeJ
Hobo 63 on the list is Lil’ Jonny Songbird, the Songbird-Eater. I assume that’s what the number plate is for, right?
Keith
You dressed up as a time traveller from 2009?
Genine
Yeah… but what were you for Halloween?
TheHatOnMyCat
Oddly, that’s exactly what I always thought you looked like.
.
.
.
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j/k. I swear.
Punchy
Just think. In 4 days you’ll qualify for the Palin’s clothing.
Are you wearing a mask?
Xanthippas
Jeez…was a ghost or a clown or something too cliche?
Tattoosydney
It’s 3am in Australia and time for bed, and I can’t find anywhere to drop this delightful snippet into the previous threads, so I’m going Off Topic rogue Joe the Plumber style
Goodnight and sweet, sweet dreams.
amorphous
I thought that was what everyday West Virginians looked like (question mark?)
Is it already passe to want to go as whatever her name was with the superficial backward "B" "wound"?
smiley
You8 have the biggest head I’ve ever seen!
JR
Nightmares forever. I hate clowns, masks and clown masks.
DonnaInMichigan
And here I thought you would dress up as Sam-Joe T. Plumber!!!
It’s all the rage this year…
I’m gonna count how many "Sarah Palins" I see tonight..handing out candy.
You betcha…
Michael D.
My GOD, John: You are one horribly disfigured motherfucker! So YOU were the guy in Mask?
greynoldsct00
Aw jeez, you too? My parents did that to me when I was little. Dressed me up up in dad’s old workpants, shirt and hat. I could barely walk. The topper was a fifth of whiskey (with whiskey still in it!) that they put in the pocket. Oh, and ashes on my face. All the neighbors had laughs at my expense and Mom joined in. It was always too damned cold for the girlie costumes I used to beg for. Ah, childhood.
TheHatOnMyCat
Yes, I think Napolitano can beat McCain in that contest. It would be tough, and take a hell of a lot of money. Janet is a good, solid and down to earth Democrat with a lot of support in this red state. She was elected to her second term by a wide margin even after her Republican opponent tried to play the "family values" card against her (she is an unannounced LGBT, with emphasis on the G).
Arizona is changing, and for the better.
Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse
My childhood costumes were almost always snowsuit plus [mask], or snowsuit plus headscarf plus makeup = gypsy. I never, ever got to be a fairy princess in a pretty dress because Montreal Octobers would make that child abuse.
We had fun at my alternative high school in suburban Toronto, though. We always had a transvestite contest at Halloween that was open to all — gay, straight, girls, guys, whatever. I once entered on the spur of the moment, wearing black mesh stockings and a black silk half-slip pulled up to chest level, plus some quickly applied gory makeup on my face and neck. I announced that I was the ghost of John F. Kennedy in drag. I think I placed fifth.
gex
@TheHatOnMyCat:
Wouldn’t that be an emphasis on the L?
JL
John, Maybe after Cindy kicks him out on his arse, you can loan your fine duds to McCain.
mantis
I can’t see the clown shoes!
Capelza Gradenko
So cute!
Kevin K.
Game on, Mr. Cole…
littlesky
OK, so you’re rather small, kind of homely hobo-clown…with a flowered hat.
I’ll be on the lookout for you next time you’re in Charleston, John.
Krista
You too, huh? I always wanted to be a princess or a ballerina or a fairy, but it always wound up snowing in New Brunswick right before Halloween, so we had to wear our snowpants while trick-or-treating. So the feminine, pretty costumes never really worked out.
Michael D.
@Krista: I was never allowed to wear the feminine, pretty costumes either.
Never really had anything to do with the weather in Newfoundland, however.
Krista
I’m sure you’ve made up for it. ;)
Comrade Mary, Would-Be Minion Of Bad Horse
JPEGs or it didn’t happen, Michael. :P
Ted
John, that was just a completely offensive and insensitive costume!!1!
South of I-10
@Krista: We have the exact opposite problem down here. It is usually 80 degrees and you have to find something you won’t sweat to death in. Anything fleece is out. This is the first year in a long time that it is supposed to be pleasant.
Laura W
Speaking of hobos, out of the blue I recently had a childhood flashback to Poor Richard’s Restaurant in West LA (or close to it.) Hobo theme with trains running all around up on top and bizarro decor. I was too young to recall much else. Tried to google it. Found nothing. Anyone else eat there when young and impressionable?
And then there was Kelbo’s, on Sawtelle (?) where you’d drink blue colored punch out of a huge conch shell or something? My family had some funky restaurant habits. And yes, we ate out a lot.
I realized last night I don’t have one photo of me in a costume as a child, unless you count my first communion dress and veil, or my confirmation get-up, or my Catholic school girl uniform for 11 years.
Ugh.
srv
Why the hell are you wearing a pot with flowers on it? Or is it supposed to be a red-haired hobo wearing a toupee he dug out of the trash?
No wonder you were so confused.
Dork
It’s clear from the photo that there’s a gay aborted fetus in that rucksack of yours.
Ted
WTF? Why does it remove my three exclamation points? They were comedically separated by a ‘1’.
Tsulagi
Well, if that photo doesn’t prove you weren’t a real American at even an early age I don’t know what does.
One, you’re happily celebrating a pagan holiday full of the occult. You need to see Palin’s pastor to purge you of your witchcraft obsession.
Two, you willfully choose to imitate the fiction of a homeless person in an attempt to coerce socialistic candy redistribution. Even at that age you should have known a tax cut would cause candy to rain.
Jesus is weeping.
Third Eye Open
@South of I-10:
I know what you mean, the weather has been damn near seasonal here.
Kind of destroys my theory of Florida only having two seasons: Hot and Hotter
the lies to nowhere
A grown up in a costume! What were you were twenty-five? Still trick or treating at that age is a bit too much, don’t you think, John?
caleb
As asked before, what is that in your left hand?
Is that where the "Golden McPenis" Award originates from?
Dr. Squid
Creepy looking, actually.
Reminds me of what my parents call the "infamous clown costume" that we used to have to wear at least once. Yes it was creepy too.
Well, as it turns out, they’ve stored it in the back shed where squirrels have eaten pretty much anything that wasn’t metallic. Except for that damn costume.
Genine
Wow, that’s a damn good impression of a National Review blogger.
How much do you want to bed there’s not a chain email saying that very thing.
And, Krista, I never really did the princess thing. The most girly thing I did was dress as the one of the Holograms from Jem and the Holograms. I was Aja.
Otherwise, I was an Ewok, a Pumpkin, Wonder Woman… and one of the G.L.O.W wrestlers.
Matthew
Horrifying.
smiley
@garbo:
You can just barely see the bowl but that’s obviously his bong.
That One - Cain
OMG! You’re WHITE?!
cain
Raenelle
I imagined you as better looking.
Comrade Stuck
We call that snappy dressing at the Funhouse.
AkaDad
That’s the spitting image a guy who touched me inappropriately.
Laura W
I seriously underestimated your creepiness, John.
I could watch that etrade baby every day for the rest of my life and not tire of him.
Cruel Jest
Sorry, but that just scares the crap out of me.
There is a picture of me somewhere dressed as Zorro with my fly down, however. So we’ll just call it even.
cvcobb01
Hmm, let me guess…
Pajamas… check.
Beer gut… check.
Glowing red eyes… check.
A rightwing nutcase blogger?
How prescient of you.
Mean Gene
Yup, I now know who will have the starring role in my nightmare tonight.
Then again I was dressed as a clown when I was about that age and I’ve considered clowns way creepy every since. Probably saw myself in the mirror and freaked.
grendelkhan
Brrr. Nightmare fuel. Brrr.
I'mRubberYou'reGlue
I guess so. I always think "G" when I think of same sex female couples, not "L." Just an old fashioned guy.
I like the shorter word, I suppose. Sort of the Don Drysdale approach to the intentional walk: Just hit the guy. As Don said, why waste four pitches when I can do the job with one?
But yes, if LGBT(tm) is the brand, then I guess L(tm) is the product line here.
Fulcanelli
Bet you won’t offer to do that again, Mr. Cole…
What’s up with the number? Did the grown-ups herd the young’uns around the neighborhood?
Has this shown up at RedState yet?
Comrade Tax Analyst
I don’t know why, but that picture reminds me of John McCain…or…maybe one of John McCain’s supporters.
Wait…no…OK – song…music…OK – "Bob Dylan’s 115th Dream"…3rd verse, I think:
"Ah me I busted out
Don’t even ask me how
I went to get some help
I walked by a Guernsey cow
Who directed me down
To the Bowery slums
Where people carried signs around
Saying, "Ban the bums"
I jumped right into line
Sayin’ "I hope that I’m not late"
When I realized I hadn’t eaten
For five days straight."
OK, got it now – Bob Dylan’s 115th Dream AND a John McCain supporter…guy making about $14,000/yr who thinks that Obama’s Tax Plan is gonna be bad for him.
Let’s call him, "Joe The Bum(mer)"
LanceThruster
[Homer is dressed in tattered clothes, and eating beans from a can]
Marge Simpson: Oh, Homer you’re not going as a hobo again?
Homer Simpson: Going where?
Lesley
You could have fooled me. I thought it was John McCain. (Although he has 13 houses or cars …can’t keep track…he won’t have a Whitehouse evar!!)
HyperIon
regarding LGBT: you mean "LGBTQ", don’t you?
I first heard the Q version 10 years ago when I was volunteering with the Lambert House here in Seattle. It’s a place for kids who are LGBTQ (i.e., LGBT or questioning).
But now I see the Q version more and more nationally. And it does get to an important aspect of sexuality: sometimes kids wonder about themselves AND sometimes kids (and adults) change their minds. This works against the idea I often hear from gay men (but not much from lesbians) that their sexuality is genetically determined.
Birdzilla
One very happy hobo clown and enjoyed the whole thing most likley