In the Josh Duggar post yesterday, redshirt said:
I know this story!
He cries and begs forgiveness from Jesus for his sins and the Holly Rollers forget these horrible lies from the LIBERAL MEDIA click here to donate!
Later that day, on the Duggar family blog:
Statement from Josh Duggar:
I have been the biggest hypocrite ever. While espousing faith and family values, I have been unfaithful to my wife.
I am so ashamed of the double life that I have been living and am grieved for the hurt, pain and disgrace my sin has caused my wife and family, and most of all Jesus and all those who profess faith in Him.
I have brought hurt and a reproach to my family, close friends and the fans of our show with my actions.
The last few years, while publicly stating I was fighting against immorality in our country I was hiding my own personal failures.
As I am learning the hard way, we have the freedom to choose our actions, but we do not get to choose our consequences. I deeply regret all the hurt I have caused so many by being such a bad example.
I humbly ask for your forgiveness. Please pray for my precious wife Anna and our family during this time.
This is the “cries and begs forgiveness part” of redshirt’s prediction. The “lieberal media” and “send us fat stacks” part will come in a few days.
Also, too: “biggest hypocrite ever” – do any of these assholes have even a shred of modesty? “Super-Jesus-y bedroom policeman who cheats on his wife” is the most trite, common and predictable brand of penny-ante hypocrisy around.
debbie
If Jim Bakker’s in heaven, I’m sure he’s smirking.
Pie Happens (opiejeanne)
@debbie: I think he’s still with us.
Went and checked. He’s still among the living, at age 75.
And he’s still a televangelist.
Wag
Today another evangelist cheated on their spouse
In other news, the sun rose in the east.
msdc
Yeah, it doesn’t have quite the same jolt as “Super-Jesus-y bedroom policeman who molested his sisters and never faced charges.”
I’m not saying Duggar isn’t a hypocrite, but cheating on his wife with other consenting adults would be a major step up the evolutionary ladder for this turd blossom.
boatboy_srq
One of the exceedingly few places where Josh gets it better than almost all his peers in the Reichwing. Would that the religulous-liberty anti-LGBT bakers/florists/county-clerks, the SYG ammosexuals and the anti-choice non-adopting parents were even this self-aware.
danielx
Say it ain’t so.
boatboy_srq
@msdc: Given the screwed-up upbringing Josh had, I’m almost inclined to cut him some slack there. It’s not as if he (or any of his sibs) had anything like either rational sex-ed or guidance to treat all humans – male and female – with equal respect and dignity.
OH Gandy Hopeful Cuckold
i think simple minded idiots who blame bernie sanders because he doesn’t have the balls to blame obama are far less logical. at least that makes some sort of one-off sense. black people just do crazy racoon brain bullshit. let’s get real bashing queers and tripping balls of assholes who hate republicans love for calling them racist? that isn’t helping black people . wanna help black people shut up. it’s actually the only ting that ever helped black people. do you think the north would hae fought an actual war to free slaes? no. that’s why the cause of the war was abstruse. no one wanted to free blacks per se, they were along for the ride because they were unfortunately here. that’s it, that’s black history. that is up to and including today. nothing done for black people works out. black visibility hurts actual black people. now sit down and shut up for the good of everything your koolaid ass believes.
donnah
Josh and the Duggars will rise again. A few months down the road, there will be a redemption show that features the newly-revived family hoisting Josh up in a loving, forgiving, way. He’ll be forgiven by the followers and embraced again, never to fall astray again.
And they’ll have a series about forgiveness with some tips on how to accept Jesus snd stop molesting your little sisters.
Chris
Like I said yesterday, it’d be really nice if these people put the same efforts of public self-flagellation into sins other than sex.
“Thou shalt not kill,” “thou shalt not bear false witness,” “that which you did not do for the least of me,” “love thy neighbor as thyself…”
Belafon
@Wag:
“Ain’t No Rest For The Wicked”
Cage the Elephant
Van Buren
Super Christian Hypocrite Adulterers is a great band name. Or perhaps a song that needs to be written.
Punchy
Article on Yahoo just now discusses the fact that his wife has said she will never, ever leave him, no matter what. So that brainwashing has thoroughly infected the in-laws at this point….
Also, they have 4 kids already (!) and all of them start with “M”….does that really mean he’s going Full-Duggar and going to have 1.5 dozen kids all named Mike, Mac, Mercy, and Muggs?
Paul in KY
@boatboy_srq: Don’t know if you saw it, but you were entirely correct about Imagine Dragons being a Vegas band, had them confused with Tame Impala, for some reason.
NonyNony
@Punchy:
Um, I suspect that the only way you marry into the Duggar clan is if you already believe the same baloney that they believe.
Thor Heyerdahl
@Punchy:
Paul in KY
@donnah: I could see it happening in a couple of years. IF, he can keep on the straight & narrow.
Paul in KY
@Belafon: Great song!! Have seen Cage now 3 times. Awesome sets each time. Must see live!
They are from Bowling Green, KY!!
Paul in KY
@Punchy: They could name one ‘Mollyester’.
Joel
Yeah, I’m not going to join the Duggar pile-on. Like I said in the earlier thread, this guy was reared in a cult. His whole world view is fucked up. And it looks like it’s beyond repair, I’m afraid.
boatboy_srq
@Paul in KY: Didn’t see, but whew! Confusion goes with the territory in modern pop: I’m still trying to wrap my head around Arctic Monkeys.
Scratch
@Punchy:
I sure hope he names at least one kid Madison.
Paul in KY
@boatboy_srq: Have seen Arctic Monkeys 3 times. Fine band, give an excellent live performance. Lot of songs sound alike (IMO), due to lead singer’s distinctive voice.
Pie Happens (opiejeanne)
Wasn’t there a mention yesterday of Repubican bigwig whose name was on the AM member list ? Somewhere in the South. He claimed it was for research.
ETA: Louisana head of GOP, Jason Dore.
Culture of Truth
The whole family is screwed up
bystander
@Punchy: And the twins, Mary and Magdalene.
Amir Khalid
Nice to know that you can always count on the ostentatiously devout being rank hypocrites. It’s the same in every faith. I think it’s got to do with the kind of people who feel the need to show off their devotion.
boatboy_srq
@Van Buren: Didn’t they open for Recreational Abortionists at Glastonbury last year?
A Ghost To Most
“The Devil says the only thing that’s buggin him,
Is Hell’s fillin up with Republikins”
“Demonic Posession”
JPL
@donnah: Yesterday, I read that TLC will have a show with the Duggar’s talking about sex abuse at the end of this month. I’ll try to google it and get more info.
Uncle Cosmo
OUAT it pissed me off regularly how the self-righteously-entitled can commit the most heinous atrocities & just whip out that “Get Out Of Sin” card.
In fact they get that card in return for submission to the Authoriteh of whatever virgin ;) of Jeebus their church recognizes. Any sin can be forgiven so long as you submit. Submission addresses two facets of the congregation’s existential terror: (1) it reinforces the groupthink of “there’s only One True God, & He’s ours!” & soothes the gnawing suspicion that He might not be—
–and (2) it calms the fears of a congregation that knows deepdown that they are (at least) potentially capable of horrendous acts & need to be terrorized into virtue by the threat of their OTG’s eternal infernal punishment, but if they just submit to Big Daddy In The Clouds they can keep from acting out. So many of the faithful are (in 12-stepper jargon) white-knuckling their way through existence.
I have some cause to reflect on such things this week–my mother passed away Sunday night at the age of 102 (the last years mostly lost to encroaching dementia) & we buried her yesterday. Mom had the Italian-American mother’s simple faith, addressing her prayers to Mary rather than to her Boy or his Dad, and rarely saw the inside of a church for her last dozen years. But she & my father (who was the ultimate religious cynic–“all they care about is what’s in that collection envelope”) were better Christians in the way they treated their family, friends & neighbors than 99% of the hypocrites running around praising Jesus while trying to ride herd on the Devil’s longhorns inside them itching to stampede (yippie-ky-yay, yippie-ky-yo).
Paul in KY
@Amir Khalid: Jesus called them The Pharisees. Really lambasted them.
Paul in KY
@Uncle Cosmo: My condolences to your family. 102 is one heck of an age to reach. Sorry her last years were marred by dementia. That’s a real burden on kids. My father has been diagnosed with dementia.
JPL
@JPL: found it..
Breaking the Silence August 30
Jill and Jessa Duggar will also speak out in the documentary. The sisters have admitted that they were both molested by their brother Josh over a decade ago.
Botsplainer
The cheap grace of fundamentalist Christianity and the ability to blame shitty decisions on the corporeal individual called Satan are going to be the death of this country.
Think about it – it’s the ultimate get out of jail free card. Easy forgiveness and somebody else to blame.
Also, the alleged sacrifice of Jesus is laughable theology if you hold the theory that the dude was divine – if divine, there is no sacrifice.
Mustang Bobby
Just curious how much the family would stand with him if he was busted for having a profile on MANHUNT.net. (Yeah, I know, boatboy_srq…”Eww!” right?) They’d run away from him so fast it would take the light five years to catch up.
Also, with 19 kids, statistics suggest that at least one, perhaps two, has to play for the other team.
Gin & Tonic
@JPL: Good reminder to turn off the teevee that day.
Hey, is anybody old enough to remember when TLC was The Learning Channel, and aired programs of an educational character?
Belafon
@Amir Khalid:
I think they’re the kind of people who think they can save themselves by saving others. “But God, I converted six people to your cause.”
boatboy_srq
@Uncle Cosmo: My condolences, and firm conviction that she rests In The Light. Sounds like a great lady.
@Paul in KY: OUCH. Best of luck. There are decent treatments and exercises to slow the damage, but nothing really to halt it. Mum had that her last 6 or 7 years: mental exercises (puzzles, games, changes of scenery, involving her in things) were a big help – at least as much as physical exercise.
boatboy_srq
@Mustang Bobby: [comment redacted]
Frank
I think that Josh saying that he is “biggest hypocrite ever” is more a manipulation than a egotistical statement.
Kid: “I’m the worst little boy in the world!”
Mom: “No, you’re not THAT bad.”
wuzzat
@boatboy_srq: Eh. I’ll fully blame his upbringing for his not getting the help he needed when it became obvious that he was kind of fucked up, but “19 and Counting” wasn’t exactly “Flowers in the Attic.”
Roger Moore
@Gin & Tonic:
I’m old enough to remember when MTV was Music Television and played mostly music videos.
oldgold
I have some compassion for him. He was born into and lived in a very strange environment. He developed a problem and received no counseling or therapy so the family con could go on.
howard
Iris Dement nails it:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fpQNLZRcNA4
Paul in KY
@boatboy_srq: We have him in an Adult Daycare (to help out mom, who’s 90 herself, yet still on the ball, but 90). They do a lot of that. He’s in good spirits, is a good natured soul, but is slowly fading.
boatboy_srq
@Mustang Bobby: Assuming Josh did that, and then went through some sort of Exodus-style ex-LGB “treatment program”, they’d probably welcome him back – but bust his seniority down below the youngest son so all his younger brothers would get better treatment. And then – when he “relapsed” – then they’d kick him out.
Pie Happens (opiejeanne)
@Paul in KY: Jesus didn’t call them The Pharisees, they were Pharisees . Pharisees were a group within Judaism predating Jesus by a few hundred years. It was their public behavior that drew Jesus’ attention.
Botsplainer
@Gin & Tonic:
Anybody got a list of TLC advertisers for an organized boycott of the whole rancid network?
rikyrah
Good Morning, Everyone
boatboy_srq
@wuzzat: I’ve met adults who grew up in similar families – among 3 or 4 kids. They’re screwed up pretty badly as it is. Nineteen kids, plus TV crews all over the house/yard/church/work/schooling/wherever equals One Severe Screwing Up. Plus there’s the rags-to-riches effect of going straight from public assistance to household-word-teevee-stardom. Layer on layer of toxic stew there. What he did was wrong – but Daddy Duggar takes the blame for not doing a single constructive thing to alter any of it.
Pie Happens (opiejeanne)
@rikyrah: Hiya. I’ve been up since 4:30 for no particular reason. Can’t stay asleep.
boatboy_srq
@Paul in KY: Daycare is good. Do you have a Home Health Aide or other in-house care options? Any social groups he can still participate in? Dunno about the rest of KY, but the People’s Republic of Louisville has some good resources.
RSA
Yet another shoe to drop, though it could take a while longer, might be a tell-all article from one of the women that Duggar met through AM. That would depend on one of them wanting the publicity; you never know.
Botsplainer
@Pie Happens (opiejeanne):
And interestingly, the Pharisees have reached their ascendancy in American fundamentalist Christianity, what with the insistence on noisy public displays of religiousity. Prayers at government meetings, prayers at ball games, campaign ads extolling church membership and family values are all indices of Pharisaicism.
rikyrah
he’s a child molestor.
now, I’m supposed to care that he’s a cheat too?
get da phuq outta here
Oatler.
@Botsplainer: Who will they crucify? Surely not any priests…
Tommy
@Botsplainer: I am already boycotting the channel because they don’t show anything I remotely want to watch. I remember it wasn’t that long ago, they used to have many shows on that did some justice to their name. You know The Learning Channel. Not so much anymore,
Cervantes
@Botsplainer:
Yes, and the Sadducees are with us also.
Botsplainer
@boatboy_srq:
I don’t think he’s here in the People’s Democratic Socialist Sharia Republic of Louisville, which is a lovely little chunk of Kenya in heartland ‘Murka.
As we speak, I’m sitting at a shaded table on a brick sidewalk and sipping coffee from a locally owned shop like I’m French while I can enjoy it. When Matt Bevin becomes governor, he’ll incentivize plowing up the sidewalks and making Main an 8 lane 45 mile an hour thoroughfare in order to better move people out of downtown and into suburban McMansions, where they belong…
boatboy_srq
@Botsplainer:
I am so stealing that and using it on my colleagues there…
Tommy
Wonkette just put up a post that kind of is a must read for those of us concerned about police and them kind of shooting a lot of people.
It came about after 300 police chiefs met to talk about well, being police. It would seem they are kind of sane and realized it would be a really good idea if their officers didn’t shot people as often as they do.
What is very telling is the chart they have that outlines the training officers get. At the very top of the list is firearm training. Well down the list is training for de-escalation and crisis intervention.
Seems that might be something they want to flip flop.
boatboy_srq
@Tommy: [cough]. 58 hours with firearms, 49 in “defensive tactics”, 16 in “basic first-aid” and a collective sixteen hours in de-escalation and crisis intervention? Wow.
Tommy
@Botsplainer: Lets hope not:
My parents are members of a high-end timeshare thingy. There is a place they stay in Nashville about once a month. They don’t go for the music, but I hear there are a lot of antique malls.
I’ve gone with them a few times and I would never think of a town like Nashville having this, but their public transportation is flat out wonderful and what should be a model for all mid-sized cities.
I don’t know how much money they have invested in their downtown, but it is very inviting and a joy to shop or have a cup of coffee.
I just would never think of Nashville as kind of a progressive city but it kind of feels like it when you are there.
WaterGirl
I have to say I agree with this part:
Pie Happens (opiejeanne)
@Botsplainer: All things that Jesus was not in favor of.
WaterGirl
@Gin & Tonic:
Nowadays that’s HBO, and it seems to be called Last Week Tonight with John Oliver. I LOVED his sex education segment last week, and it’s not the first time he’s taught me a lot while making me laugh.
Pie Happens (opiejeanne)
@Cervantes: Not sure if that’s bad thing or a good thing.
RSA
@WaterGirl:
Yeah, that showed surprising-for-him insight, I think.
rikyrah
lack of church attendance?
WHAT DA PHUQ?
…………………
Kris Kobach employee allegedly fired for lack of religious fervor, lawsuit claims
Posted: August 19, 2015 – 1:28pm
A former state employee filed a federal wrongful termination lawsuit targeting Kansas’ assistant secretary of state and alleging the dismissal was based on her lack of church attendance, court records said Wednesday.
Eric Rucker, a top lieutenant to Secretary of State Kris Kobach since 2011, was sued in his official capacity by former staff member Courtney Canfield, of Topeka.
Before her discharge in November 2013, the lawsuit alleges, Rucker “repeatedly and emphatically indicated a basis for her termination as the fact that, ‘She just doesn’t go to church.’ ”
Shortly after she was hired as a clerk in January 2013, Canfield was invited by one of Kobach’s administrative assistants to attend a religious service to be conducted in the secretary of state’s office, her civil rights lawsuit said. Canfield declined to worship with colleagues at Kobach’s office in Topeka.
The lawsuit asserts Rucker’s decision to oust Canfield violated constitutional rights of religious expression. She is a Methodist, the lawsuit says, but didn’t regularly attend church services. The lawsuit indicates Rucker had knowledge of her view on religious expression.
http://cjonline.com/news/state/2015-08-19/kris-kobach-employee-allegedly-fired-lack-religious-fervor-lawsuit-claims
Tommy
@WaterGirl: TLC maybe a decade ago used to be one of my most watched channels. Before I got rid of cable I couldn’t tell you the last time I watched anything on it. The same can be said for The History Channel. I used to watch it almost non-stop. Now I do get The History Channel on Sling but outside of American Pickers and Ancient Aliens (which is so over-the-top it is actually good) there isn’t a single show I watch on it.
Tommy
@boatboy_srq: I don’t mind they have a lot of training with firearms. If you are going to carry a gun around for your job you darn well better know how to use it.
But it seems to me that de-escalation is kind of the core of their job, or at least the most important part of it. I once worked at and then ran a suicide hotline in college. We used forms of de-escalation and we got an entire class, an entire semester before we were ever allowed to pick up the phone and talk to somebody.
These people get 8 hours. That is just staggering in a not good kind of way.
Gex
@boatboy_srq: Except for many years he has been presented with an alternate way of viewing human sexuality and relationships and rather than considering those views and questioning his upbringing, he has doubled down and made it profitable for himself to believe the fucked up shit he was brought up to believe.
As someone who is working hard in therapy (disorganized attachment style and bipolar disorder) I know it is hard work taking responsibility for who you are, what you think, and how you act. But an adult needs to do that. He has not wanted to do that. So I have some sympathy for him as you don’t get to pick your parents. But that only goes so far because the fuckers that want to scream “PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY” at everyone else ought to take a little bit of personal responsibility themselves.
Chris
@Tommy:
Meh. Stargate covered the same topic with more space battles, more explosions, and more Guardians Of The Galaxy type hijinks. :D
beltane
Josh Duggar is lacking in imagination. To contrast, the executive director of Louisiana’s Republican party is a man who knows how to think on his feet. He claims his Ashley Madison account was solely for purposes of doing oppo research: http://www.dailykos.com/story/2015/08/21/1414136/-Louisiana-GOP-head-says-he-used-Ashley-Madison-account-for-opposition-research
J R in WV
@rikyrah:
And so another “religious” politician reveals why the US Constitution prohibits religious tests for any federal office. Shame the federal government can’t regulate that in all the states and cities.
But on the other side, I bet there’s an old sub-paragraph in the state founding documents that puts this junior wanna-be “religious” pol in his proper place, in a deep sub-basement, for being un-American in so many ways.
trollhattan
@donnah:
Oh hell yes. There’re so damn many of them it’s like the Pro version of Wack-a-Mole and here we are with just one hammer: The “Liberal” Media. We’re in for three generations of these assholes. I’ve warned my kid.
Tommy
@beltane: What stuns me is how shit all stupid these folks are and many more like them. Don’t they get for a second they are public figures and they are leaving a digital footprint that will come back to bite them eventually.
I need to set up a business to help these people do shit they would never want to become public, well make it so it doesn’t become public.
I mean buy a cheap VPN service so it is harder for anybody to hack your network. Get up on the concept of using a proxy server. Heck lets start with you not using your real name and an email address that can be traced back to you.
I mean these folks are so darn stupid they deserve to get caught and shamed in public!
boatboy_srq
@Gex: Agree entirely, which is why I almost feel sorry for Josh – but don’t really.
boatboy_srq
@Tommy: EXACTLY. All that time training how to kill people, and eight BLEEPing hours learning how to work a situation so you don’t have to? That there’s a recipe for nothing but dead suspects.
Paul in KY
@Pie Happens (opiejeanne): Good catch, Pie.
beltane
@Tommy: I agree. Even the trolls who post here are smarter than these people.
Paul in KY
@boatboy_srq: Have tried to get some of that, but mother still resisting. Does not like ‘strangers’ in house. Will probably come to that sooner or later.
Tommy
@beltane: How about it. I know there are a few regulars here that are way more advanced with their technology and computers skills then myself.
We ought to really connect, and I am almost totally serious, and figure out how we’d start a business like this. Because it seems from the news reports I see almost daily the target audience of public figures doing shit they wouldn’t want to become public knowledge is larger than I would have thought by many factors.
Paul in KY
@Tommy: I think Nashville is like the Austin of TN (leaving aside that both are state capitals).
boatboy_srq
@Botsplainer: @Tommy: I do think that there’s a chunk missing from the caricatures of Real ‘Murika: namely, the “rural” quotient inherent in so many of the Reichwing fantasies. A surprising number of cities – Nashville and Louisville included – are reasonably forward-thinking when it comes to walkable communities, transit and other public-sector amenities, and the like. The Reichwhingeing is as much country-vs-city as it is left/right: the wholesome hardworking farmers’ envy of the lazy, decadent life of city-dwellers lurks right below the surface. Not a small part of the fantasy can be attributed to over-reverence for the family farm construct, and the necessity of the nearby (small) market town, and denial over the Big Ag combine and the metropolis that exist in their place.
Tommy
@Paul in KY:
I think that is very accurate. I didn’t realize that until I spent some time there, but it is a city I could be very happy living in. And the citizens of Nashville seem to be proud of it. When you check into the timeshare they actively promote both the transit system and downtown.
My parents would drive a block and never been on a bus in their lives. First time I went with them I saw the city via bus and rail.
I live in a pretty rural, small town area. But I have a pretty advanced transit system. I use it all the time and I am always depressed somewhat because it seems NOBODY uses it.
I can’t say that about Nashville. People not only seem to have embraced it but they freaking use it. That made me very happy!
boatboy_srq
@Paul in KY: Interviews are crucial: allow a couple hours if you can for everyone to get comfortable. HHAs are as nervous as Mom is on first meeting, and will need to feel comfortable in the house just as Mom will need to be comfortable having them there. Be prepared to interview several people: it takes time to find a good fit. Mum and I went through several people over 2 years, and let go more than a couple because they weren’t a good match.
boatboy_srq
@Tommy: Sounds a bit like TOR for Dummies. Probably very marketable.
Bubblegum Tate
And of course, this episode will lead to a thorough, unflinching examination of and within the Quiverfull culture, particularly taking note of the role its absurdly oppressive sexual rules–which run counter to just about every aspect of basic human sexuality–played in Josh’s horrific deviancy.
HAHAHAHAHA! No, it’s all the LIEbruls’ fault, which means the rules have to become even harsher.
Chris
@boatboy_srq:
How many genuinely rural people are left anymore in this country? Not that those that exist aren’t conservative, but I always got the sense that the bulk of conservative support came from suburbanites, if only because there’s a lot more of them.
Tommy
@boatboy_srq: @Paul in KY: I wish you and your mother luck. My grandfather has a stroke in the last 90s. He needed care my mom and dad just couldn’t do all on their own.
They called and interviewed some resources the hospital provided and the homecare nurse they got was flat out amazing.
Even more amazing since my grandfather was a mean spirited grumpy old man before he had the stroke and the lady was able to deal with it like we couldn’t. A total pro.
I hope you can find the same!
Chris
@Bubblegum Tate:
The Vatican’s response to the child abuse scandal was to be profusely apologetic for having been so tolerant and lenient towards homosexuality within the Church, and promising that they’d be better at cracking down on it in the future, as I recall.
So, yeah. They’ll find a way to blame the promiscuousness of society for having infiltrated their walls.
Paul in KY
@boatboy_srq: Thank you for the advice. Not looking forward to when that has to happen.
Paul in KY
@Tommy: Thank you, Tommy!
Tommy
@boatboy_srq: Oh I think I could make a ton of money and I am not really joking when I note I am pondering how I’d do it.
I could just use the products and services I get in one daily newsletter from StackSocial. They offer geeky toys but also courses in security. Super inexpensive VPNs and cloud storage.
If they’d just create an alias for themselves. Use a VPN. Have their naked pics on a cloud service and not their home or worse yet their work computer and they are halfway to keep their dirty secret private.
boatboy_srq
@Chris: Nearly none – everywhere but the Teahad lizard brain. Buried in the Reichwhinge is the presumption that if only Ahmurrca went back to that primarily-rural model, all the evils of modern society would vanish and All would become Right With The World once again. They can’t put that genie back in that bottle – and they hate that they can’t.
boatboy_srq
@Paul in KY: Actually, I’d recommend sooner rather than later. Sooner lets Mom and Dad get used to having help in the house before it becomes a necessity. Same with ALFs and hospice. Transition anxieties are far worse when the elder isn’t accustomed to them. One additional suggestion: use a reputable firm with references you can check (“duh,” you say: but there are plenty of shady outfits out there to grift Dad, and there are plenty of good companies with shady employees who won’t be able to cover loss by grift; do some extra homework and it’s less likely Dad will be had).
boatboy_srq
@Tommy: I’ll build the infrastructure if you’ll do the marketing… ,-)
Tommy
@Chris: Many more than you might think but still a very small number compared to urban areas. I live in a rural area and I might also note a lot of the farmers are not nearly as conservative as you might think.
Until the last election, my district had elected a Democrat to Congress for 70 years. Those that won knew a few things about those that would vote for them. These farmers or rural residents care about three things. Guns, they like their guns. Unions, very pro-union. Public education.
Education is so key to them (and I think most Americans). I’ve had wide and far ranging conversations with many and they know farming is a hard life. A life that is becoming hard to continue to do when you have to compete against massive corporate farms.
They openly say they want their children to get a stellar education so maybe they can become a doctor or something more than what they did with their lives.
redshirt
I can’t tell the difference between ABC News, Hill Street Blues,
and a preacher on the Olde Tyme Gospel Hour,
stealing money from the sick and the poor.
Bubblegum Tate
@Chris:
That’s certainly the wingnut Catholics’ rationale, at any rate: “Vatican II totally liberalizes the Church and carved out all this space in which child molesters could thrive. This century-old scandal that vastly pre-dates Vatican II is therefore clearly the fault of liberals, liberal society, and the Church letting liberals in. We need to de-liberalize the Church in order to heal her.”
Tommy
@boatboy_srq: Oh that would be the way it has to work. I know enough about technology to know I don’t know much I should know.
With that said I am totally not joking about this. You can reach me at tommy dot young at gmail dot com.
If I could find a few people to help I could have a domain and a basic (but very professional) site up in a few hours.
Now given the downside, and it is a huge downside I will openly admit, we’d be dealing with a most likely sleazy group of people. But my experience is often sleazy people have money to spend :).
BTW: We’d also really need to find a lawyer to talk to. Thinking if we say we will “protect” people and then a client’s stuff becomes public, we’d need to have a contract or terms and conditions to protect us.
boatboy_srq
@Tommy: Mum had a few like that: really good, talented people. But we had a couple we could tell right away weren’t good, either incompatible personalities or insufficiently capable. Longer interviews helped identify those quickly.
1stgengirl
@Frank: It also smacks of pride. He’s actually boasting about how great his sin was. Compared to what or whom?
Bubblegum Tate
@boatboy_srq:
So that’s a real thing, then? One wingnut I know has a serious bug up his ass about how society was ruined once the damn dirty liberals started cramming everybody into cities. I figured this was just his retconnish way of assailing the fact that most major population centers tend to vote liberal rather than conservative. I also figured this was a particular peculiarity of his. Interesting to know it’s more widespread than that.
Tommy
@Bubblegum Tate: It is a very real thing. I live in rural Illinois and it isn’t the issue it is in MO. I am only 33 miles from MO so I get my TV, radio, and newspapers out of that state at a level I almost don’t feel like I live in IL.
In a statewide election in MO only three places vote for Democrats. St. Louis. Kansas City. Columbia (where the University of MO is located). The rest of the state is so deep red it is hard to comprehend.
As best I can tell there is a dislike, if not a straight-up hatred by these districts against the cities. I find this hard to understand because there are parts of southern MO that make parts of rural Appalachia look “rich” by comparison.
boatboy_srq
@Bubblegum Tate: There’s serious nostalgia baked into conservatism: things were so much better back in [insert fantastical Golden Age here]. The Teahad and Objectivist Libertarianism both hark back to immediately-pre-industrial days: times when you could barter products-for-services, when what you bought and sold were easily determined to be wholesome, and when if somebody did you wrong you could haul him/her before the Justus’o’the’Peace and get satisfaction (without expensive lawyers getting involved). Happier/simpler – and demonstrably fictitious if you take the time to pull it apart.
Paul in KY
@boatboy_srq: She has to accept the need. She doesn’t think there’s a need at present time. She will have to deteriate a bit more. She has always been a very independent woman.
Paul in KY
@Tommy: I have an old military friend who lives in O’Fallon. That’s a republican hangout. He’s a wingnut too. Seems to have got religion at some point & has it in for O’Bummer (although he admits Dubya was a colossal screw-up).
boatboy_srq
@Paul in KY: Could she use a cook? A housekeeper? Somebody to run errands? There are a lot of things HHAs do that are useful – and a lot of things that don’t seem obvious.
CONGRATULATIONS!
@Bubblegum Tate: Oddly enough, this was one of Hitler’s big issues. I don’t think it has to do with voting, I think it’s something much weirder than that.
NotMax
@Tommy
Want to see a model of sensible urban public transportation which has been functioning for 40 years?
When have the free time look up the city of Curitiba, Brazil, and also Jaime Lerner, its forward-thinking mayor at the time (and several times since)
WereBear
There will be complaints that Anna will not hear of divorcing Josh. It’s not that she is a doormat. Though she is. It’s that she’s been trained to be one since birth. She might not be able to conceive of thinking of leaving him.
Because forgiveness is only for the men.
NotMax
@WereBear
As the old joke about the answer offered when the long suffering circus worker whose job consisted of nothing but shoveling up animal dung day after day was asked why he didn’t seek other, likely better and less odiferous employment put it:
“What, and leave show business?”
Paul in KY
@boatboy_srq: She probably could, BUT the problem is getting someone she would be comfortable with, the aggravation of having to let them in, etc. feeling like she could not go anywhere while they were there, the aggravation (to her) of having to manage them (have them do things the way she wants it done). We do have a housekeeper who comes in every Friday. Mom likes her. She cannot be a full-timer though, due to other commitments.
At some point, she will be forced to accept someone. She is a very strong-minded woman & does not like to be pushed into doing stuff. Once she realizes that she has to have the help, she’ll be easier to work with or will just have to accept my or my sister’s choice.
Tommy
@WereBear: I tell this story. I was at my mom’s dad funeral. Outside having a smoke. This person I didn’t know started a conversation with me. When he found out who I was he asked me about my mom’s first husband.
My mom and dad had been married for 45 years. I went to my dad and asked him WTF. He said it was true, mom had been married before. He beat and raped her. Why the wedding photos you have of us, mom is in a blue dress and not a white dress. How things were at that time.
Later dad and mom got married. Why she gives so much to rape prevention. Gives of her time and effort. Money. Why she beats into my head how important it is I respect females.
a hip hop artist from Idaho (fka Bella Q)
@redshirt: the G-d I believe in isn’t short of cash, Mister.
Mnemosyne (iPhone)
@JPL:
I had a free subscription to People magazine forced on me (long story) and People tells me that Ma and Pa Duggar were surprised to discover that our secular, Jeebus-hating society takes child molestation more seriously than they do. They apparently thought it was no big deal and would be quickly forgotten.
The Other Chuck
@Tommy: I spent a day in Nashville not long ago, and it really is music city — yes, much of it country-flavored, but great even so. It’s not just the godawful overrated Opry, every little club or dive bar has live music most every night. After Nashville, I went to Memphis, which doesn’t have much to recommend it other than good barbecue (and the also-overrated Graceland I suppose). Didn’t even stay overnight, ended up driving all the way to Little Rock AK instead.
Another really interesting city I wouldn’t mind seeing again is Charleston WV. The downtown doesn’t seem to have too much to it, but it’s definitely a city of distinct neighborhoods, including some fairly unusual ones with twisty winding narrow roads through terraced hills.
Waldo
You know how it is with these family-values hypocrites — go big or go homo.
The Other Chuck
@WereBear: I dunno, her entire job is conceiving after all…
psychobroad
@rikyrah: Thank you. Child molester is pretty high up on the disgusting scale–several rungs above cheating on your spouse.
Mnemosyne (iPhone)
@boatboy_srq:
Bicycle advocates will tell you that, surprisingly, support for bikes and walkable cities doesn’t fall along party lines. Some Democrats are anti-bike (including our CA governor Jerry Brown) and some Republicans love them. It has a lot more to do with local attitudes than with national politics.
Mnemosyne (iPhone)
@Paul in KY:
Possibly weird question, but does your current housekeeper know someone or have a relative who might be available? Sometimes that works out because then your mom feels like the new person is someone who’s been “approved” by someone she already trusts.
Rasputin's Evil Twin
@Gin & Tonic: Yes, I’m that old. Hell, I remember when A&E did arts and entertainment, and when Bravo wasn’t just “The Fake-boobed Skanks of Wherever the Hell We are THIS Season.” TLC was The Learning Channel” and not “This Lousy Crap” I even recall when the sports news didn’t start with the list of who got arrested over the weekend. How’s that for old?
I’ll be at the bar.
Tehanu
@Paul in KY:
Sorry to hear this. My mom had it too before she passed away, but she did crossword puzzles every day and although her memory was shot, she remained the same person she’d always been — she didn’t lose herself. So I’m a believer in keeping the mind as stimulated as possible. Hope your dad is as lucky.
JR
They put up giant billboards with messages ostensibly signed by God.
Does that answer your question?
Chris
@CONGRATULATIONS!:
I think that’s a very common and widespread sentiment that goes way back. It was especially big in the late nineteenth and early twentieth centuries (so yes, Hitler would fit right in), when many thought that industrialization and urbanization were tearing up and destroying the good traditional values of the rural, agrarian communities. And the good old days of hard working men who grew or hunted their own food and had a plot of land to call their own and lived healthy outdoor lives… instead of growing soft and/or losing their souls in an artificial environment controlled by bean counters and slick wheeler dealers.
Hard to narrow it down to one ideology, this kind of sentiment took among many different people. American slave owners and European aristocrats both had it in spades, hand in hand with their resentment of the newer bourgeois elites that thrived in the big cities. Usually it’s big among conservatives, but I believe there were “back to the basic outdoor lifestyle and away from this modern madness” movements even within the seventies New Left.
Paul in KY
@Mnemosyne (iPhone): That’s an interesting idea. Could work. Will check into it. Thanks!
Paul in KY
@Tehanu: Thank you very much for your kind words, Tehanu.