Maureen Dowd, self-appointed Queen Bee Mean Girl of the Villagers’ lunchroom, is the perfect reviewer for Darth Cheney’s new book:
Vice’s new memoir, “In My Time,” veers unpleasantly between spin, insisting he was always right, and score-settling, insisting that anyone who opposed him was wrong.
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His knife-in-her-teeth daughter, Elizabeth Cheney, helped write the book. The second most famous Liz & Dick combo do such an excellent job of cherry-picking the facts, it makes the cherry-picking on the Iraq war intelligence seem picayune…
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Vice gleefully predicted that his memoir would have “heads exploding all over Washington.” But his book is a bore. He doesn’t even mention how in high school he used to hold the water buckets to douse the fiery batons of his girlfriend Lynne, champion twirler.
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At least Rummy’s memoir showed some temperament. And George Tenet’s was the primal scream of a bootlicker caught out.
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Cheney takes himself so seriously, flogging his cherished self-image as a rugged outdoorsman from Wyoming (even though he shot his Texas hunting partner in the face) and a vice president who was the only thing standing between America and its enemies.
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He acts like he is America. But America didn’t like Dick Cheney.
Say what you will about Joe Biden, at least he has an ethos a pulse.
Kane
Seems like only yesterday that we were being told that the previous administration was The Dream Team, and Cheney was portrayed as the wise old sage.
Pat In Massachusetts
And I was so hoping that Washington, D.C. would be strewn with slimy brains from exploded heads.
A girl can dream.
russell
They don’t call him dick for nothing.
Odie Hugh Manatee
Darth Cheney is truly the walking dead. It’s the one thing I will curse modern medicine for.
The planet will be a better place without him.
Ash Can
I don’t recall her being that nasty to him when he was still in power. It doesn’t take either guts or effort to kick someone when he’s down. (On the other hand, in her defense, she may have feared having a hit put on her if she’d lipped off while he was still VP.)
Will Reks
I think I came across this link on earlier thread. I’m still kinda angry about it. That man is utterly shameless.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YENbElb5-xY
John S.
Cheney is one man the Dude would not abide.
Mustang Bobby
On the other hand, I’ve seen pictures of Cheney on TV, and he looks a lot better now that he’s had the bolts tightened in his neck.
Mark S.
Allen West, Teabilly Foreign Ambassador:
And more stupid historical analogies:
So I guess West either wants a one state solution with equal rights for Palestinians, or he wants to ethnically cleanse them into Jordan. Or he doesn’t know what the fuck he’s talking about.
Omnes Omnibus
@Mark S.: I am going with Option 3.
drkrick
@Mark S.: I’m guessing two.
Chris
@Mark S.:
At least once a day, I read a conservative make an earth-shatteringly stupid statement, where it’s painfully obvious that they’re not lying or pandering or playing along – they really and sincerely just don’t have any idea what the fuck they’re talking about.
And every time, I hear the voice of what’s-his-face from South Park ringing in my ears going “mmm’kay, now let’s try and get a response from someone who’s not a complete retard.”
Mustang Bobby
@Mark S.: West represents a district in South Florida with a substantial Jewish population. Someone on his staff must feel like he has to say something — anything — that has the word “Palestine” in it or he won’t be reaching out to them; doesn’t matter if it’s word salad.
Svensker
@Odie Hugh Manatee:
Judging from the way he looks, the planet doesn’t have long to wait to be rid of him.
Svensker
@Mark S.:
My fundie wingnut cousins are always talking about how there’s no such thing as “Palestine” and never was. It’s a big meme in the Israel Uber Alles set these days.
Chris
@Svensker:
This in defense of a country that was created out of thin air in 1947 and populated mostly by people who’d never lived anywhere near the land they were now claiming as their own.
Ben Cisco
And now everybody wants to get inta da act: http://crooksandliars.com/nicole-belle/george-will-slams-dick-cheney-not-apo
maya
Shove a pipe up “The Most Powerful Vice President Ever’s” ass when he croaks and he can power his own eternal flame.
sukabi
Anne Laurie, take yourself out to the woodshed for a beating! Comparing Biden to Cheney was totally uncalled for! WTF has Biden ever done to you — or for that matter the country? He may run his mouth uncontrollably, but he’s more a harmless lug, than the war profiteer, torture enthusiast, war criminal that Cheney is…
John Weiss
@russell: He was and will remain Our Big Dick.
John Weiss
@Ben Cisco: Screw George Will, the Serious Man. Why would anyone want to listen to a hypocrite?
Paul in KY
Good job by MoDo. She’s good at deflating the pompous.
trollhattan
@Mustang Bobby:
Heh, indoozle. He probably also got his transfusion of orphan tears and virgin spleens recently. Bastard will probably outlive us all, then hand his human skull scepter off to the Lizard.
Dowd occasionally provides a gen-you-wine public service; this is one of those times.
jim filyaw
cheney considers himself as the man standing between america and its enemies?
pardon me, but wouldn’t the viet cong have qualified as one of america’s enemies back in the day? you know, when he was the right age for military service, kinda like his progeny was when he and his sock puppet were starting the iraq fiasco.