On the one hand, Santa is part of the great unseen C. S. Lewis-style world, on the other he gives presents to lazy, undeserving children. He has created jobs for thousands of elves but there’s no evidence that he ever fires the less productive ones or gives merit bonuses to the most effective cobblers.
What is the proper conservative response to Santa Claus? Surely someone has written about this before.
West of the Cascades
He also exploits animals and, like many conservative pundits, favors anyone with a shiny red nose.
On the other hand, Tea Partier David Hendrick wrote a book ostensibly for children called “The Liberal Clause” to get his 15 minutes of fame: http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/12/01/liberal-clause-tea-party-christmas-book_n_790088.html
It sounds like it is full of all sorts of awesome fail (from the Huff Post story):
Here’s how Fox News describes the plot (caution: may contain spoilers):
Liberal Claus forces the elves to unionize, bails out the sled industry with town money, and stipulates that all children be given the same amount of toys, no matter if they’ve been naughty or nice.
He cites a “liberal clause” in the town’s “Christmatution” that allows him to get away with all of this – along with trying to control “elf-made global warming” and forcing townsfolk to attend a church presided over by a “Reverend Blight.”
In the end, one little girl defends the Christmastution and saves the town from Liberal Claus’ takeover – by unplugging his teleprompter.
Mustang Bobby
I’m sure Darrel Issa will be holding hearings on the scam that Santa is running masquerading as a “faith-based initiative.”
Keith
Santa only gives gifts to the kids who pick themselves up by their bootstraps. The rest go on the naughty (socialist) list.
cmorenc
Conservatives actually have ideological love for Santa Claus. Very early in childhood, kids are taught a myth that is both loving (presents made by elves and willingly given away to children by Santa) and moralistic (Santa judges bad children by withholding presents). And then? Somewhere around age seven through ten, kids learn that the Santa myth is a bunch of socialistic crap, and those presents they’ve been receiving are actually the product of their parents’ participation in the Galtian Capitalist system, paid for by money.
HoHoHo
FlipYrWhig
@West of the Cascades: Because if there’s one thing that crystallizes liberalism, it’s forcing people to attend one particular church!
David
Working conditions for the elves have gotten so bad that Santa no longer even prays for them:
http://www.hulu.com/watch/198463/family-guy-road-to-the-north-pole#s-p1-so-i0
General Stuck
Patriotic American elves work for profit Amazon, and not for some fat jolly commie dressed in red handing out freebies.
SiubhanDuinne
Found this awesomeness over at Sully’s place: http://www.bumblepigs.com/santa/
StonyPillow
Yule is a force that gives us meaning. Happy Holidays to all.
Rick Taylor
According to this ad by a conservative group and linked to by Huffington Post, Santa is a conservative who is mad that tax cuts were only extended temporarily.
cathyx
Where does Santa get the money to hire all those elves and give away so much stuff?
If he inherited it and chose to be philanthropic, then he’s a nut job and losing his marbles in his old age. Someone needs to step in an take away his keys before it’s too late.
If he’s getting taxpayer money to do this, congress will take up this loophole in the tax system as soon as congress convenes in the new year and fix that. That kind of waste only makes the deficit bigger.
If he gets the money from donations from regular folk, the government will put pressure on paypal, visa, and mastercard to stop that. He’s obviously found a way to con people into giving a swindler money.
Quiddity
@West of the Cascades: That book sounds awesome! It gets a 5-star rating from the (3) comments at Amazon – where the 42 page book sells for $21, or only 50¢ a page.
WyldPirate
Santa is a drunken, weed smoking, lazy-assed child molester.
He is also fat like Al Gore and he votes Republican.
GregB
Merry Christmas to John Cole and the rest of you Balloonatics.
May the the spirit of Ayn Rand be in your hearts all year.
srv
And gay elf marriage isn’t allowed either.
Driving to the parental units house yesterday, one gets a choice of NPR and a bunch of Xtian shows. I decided to mix it up, and one of the latter was highlighting Joseph Farrah on Christmas Eve.
It turns out Teh Gay Homosexual Agenda has completely subverted and taken over the GOP! Seriously! Groups like GOProud have infiltrated and taken over organizations like CPAC and the Tea Party movement. Anne Coulter has been banished from WND because of performances for GOProud.
He then threw Glenn Beck, Laura Bush, Cindy McCain and the non-rock ribbed legislators under the bus.
Hawes
I think I remember reading that Santa was a liberal and Moses was a conservative.
But it was probably by Bill Kristol and therefore ipso facto wrong.
Quiddity
@WyldPirate: Being up there at the North Pole, I’m wondering what Santa’s position is on global warming. I suppose he can tune in to Rush Limbaugh (on American Forces Network) and learn the truth about the liberal hoax, so maybe he’s not concerned.
Cat Lady
In fantasy wingnut world, Santa’s got two wetsuits under that suit, the reindeer look nervous, and he switches into his SS Waffen uniform tomorrow.
c u n d gulag
Conservatives want us to give all our toys to the Corporation known as Santa, so that they may trickle down to the rest of us.
As for the fate of the elves, well, everyone knows ‘the Lord elf’s those who elf themselves!’ *
*h/t to Groucho Marx.
And a Merry ChristmaHanuKwanza to all!
Mumphrey
Santa Claus is a liberal no-goodnik. He’s part of the liberal something-for-nothing cabal of wealth redistributors. He teaches children nothing of discipline or self-reliance. I mean, come on, does anybody really believe he gives “bad” children coal for Christmas? In the liberal lexicon, there’s no such word as “bad”, as it might hurt some tender little lazy ass poor kid’s feeeeeelings.
And don’t get me going about the gay elves. Does anybody ever see any woman elves? Mark my words, those little fairies are fornicating day and night, and I bet Santa Claus and his hippie, braless wife get off watching them.
We need to nuke the North Pole and wipe this godless dystopia right off the face of the earth.
WyldPirate
@Quiddity:
Santa has a good hydro set-up to grow his weed indoors. He uses DDT to keep the spider mites at bay and as a seasoning in all of his dishes. His hydro set-up is powered by a coal-fired steam plant with emissions spewed directly into the atmosphere.
Santa knows that Rachel Carson was a fat, lesbian soshulist and that Al Gore is an fat alarmist liar. HE is also on to all scientists who simply make up their data on global warming to continue on the dole from the government and to alarm the hippies.
StonyPillow
@Mumphrey: Already being taken care of — we’re liquidating ’em.
WyldPirate
@Cat Lady:
Cat Lady, you do know why Santa wears those high-top boots, don’t you?
They’re handy for stuffing the back legs of the reindeer down so they can’t run away. Hence the nervous looks.
mr. whipple
They hated him for being secular and taking attention from the baby Jesus. But once he broke the elf union they got on board.
Proudhon
He’s no US citizen, that’s for sure! Let’s see his green card! Hey, fat man, get off my roof!
Quiddity
@WyldPirate: You’re right about all those things. You know, Santa’s hangout, the North Pole, isn’t all that far from the Climate Research Unit at East Anglia University. I’ll bet St. Nick dispatched an elf or two to get those emails showing a plot by scientists in (let’s face it, totally gay) white lab coats to fake temperature data. Santa updated his “naughty” list to include a few PhD’s, you can bet on that.
Joey Maloney
@Top, there’s no evidence the least-productive elves get fired because they end up cuffed, gagged, stuffed into a sack underneath the toy sack on the sleigh, and extraordinarily rendered to a black site in Eastern Europe. All the elves know about this, but no one will complain about this, or about the pay cuts or line speedups. They’re scared shitless.
Dennis SGMM
Santa is going to get a makeover to bring him into line with conservative religious doctrine. Because there are no good little girls and boys (We’re all steeped in sin from the moment of birth) Santa will eschew gift giving. Instead, Santa will punish the bad little girls and boys year-round.
Daddy lost his job? It’s because you were bad.
Parents divorcing? It’s because you were bad.
Your dog was hit by a car? It’s because you were bad.
Don’t know how you were bad? Then you’re twice as bad until you figure it out and stop being bad because if you don’t then Santa will make more bad things happen to you.
Left Coast Tom
Santa gives coal to all the bad children, thereby slandering the Patriotic Coal Industry. He must be sued for this.
Brian S (formerly Incertus)
This might not be the conservative response to Santa, but it’s certainly one of them: Repent Amarillo executed Santa Claus.
Odie Hugh Manatee
I’m glad to be out of the Santa business completely. Our kids feel the same way about it, as does the wife. We like the family and friends aspects of the holiday but feel the gift giving seems kind of ‘forced’, like something you do to get it over with. Just another obligation done and out of the way.
We are far from well off but we have everything we really want. Maybe it makes more sense when you are starting out a family, building a home and needing ‘stuff’, but when you’ve been married twenty-five years you tend to get pretty much everything you really need if you work at it. It got to the point that we were looking at each other, shrugging our shoulders and not coming up with anything we really wanted or needed. Same with the kids, they have enough crap as it is and we replace it as they outgrow, break or wear it out. So we decided to drop out of the rat race. Kinda.
Now we spend the time together, visiting friends and family, exchanging a few small gifts between really close friends and family, meals and drink. The only real gifts that we get now are for the nephews and nieces, which taper off to birthday cards as they reach adulthood. Our kids say that when they have kids they aren’t going to continue the Santa stuff. They will give gifts but they will be practical ones and their kids will know that they were from the parents and not Santa. Our kids would rather get great stuff throughout the year than have their parents screw it up by grabbing them something ‘just to get it over with’.
Works for us anyway. I hope everyone who can is doing well and those who can’t will do so someday soon.
Happy Festivus!
monkeyball
If Santa were a real Conservative, he’d have slipped Abramoff a check for 750K and relocated his workshop to the Marianas Islands in 2003.
J.
Exploiter of elves. Manipulator of children — and possible pedophile. Flies high. Need I go on?
4tehlulz
Conservatives should love Santa. He’s a fucking dick.
S. cerevisiae
How about a little Yuletide cheer from H.P. Lovecraft
Comrade Mary
Lovecraft? Piker! How about a little Christmas cheer from Neil Gaiman?
PurpleGirl
@Brian S (formerly Incertus): I found that very interesting. He’s a complete loon in how he presents his message and those sweat shirts are just so intolerant. But at the base, he gets part of it right; it shouldn’t be about the commercialism. We all have the power to decide how we celebrate or not the holiday and give our own meanings to much of the day. Argh!
PurpleGirl
@PurpleGirl: Why did this comment get into moderation?
Was it commer*cia*lism? Double Argh!!
Bruuuuce
Clearly, Santa’s a supporter of wingnut welfare (which is right and the proper state of the world), but needs to have his Naughty and Nice lists readjusted so that the former includes all those horrible, sushulest libruls, who won’t even get a piece of coal (it’s too valuable for them) in the hole-toed stockings that they earned for themselves.
Kathleen
I hear Santa brought toys to Bill Ayers’ house when he was a child. Does that make Santa a terrorist, too?
dj spellchecka
he’s fat like al gore, nobody has seen his birth certificate,
he redistributes wealth, he has a hispanic name and he wears a red suit [the obvious giveaway to his economic leanings]
dj spellchecka
one of santa’s helpers goes to a psychiatrist’s office….
he tells the receptionist, “i really need to see the doctor, i’ve got anger issues…the other elves pick on me because i’m the smallest guy in the workshop….and i’m really getting sick of all the name-calling….”
the receptionist replies “i’ll try and squeeze you in, but you’ve just got to be a little patient.”
——————-
[inspired by/rewritten from: “old jews telling jokes”]
website
http://oldjewstellingjokes.com/
lacp
I asked Santa to bring me an erection lasting more than four hours.
lacp
@dj spellchecka: A hispanic name? I thought his full name was Santa Klaus Barbie.
Jewish Steel
Keeps a list of the naughty and nice. Big Brother or nanny state? You make the call.
John Cole
Pj O’Rourke. God is a Republican and Santa Claus is a Democrat.
From Parliament of Whores, if I remember correctly.
Mojo
He does give away toys to everybody but he stays on the right side of the GOP by giving more and better toys to the children of rich people.
Davis X. Machina
Santa’s a stone Keynsian, and understands — It’s the aggregate demand, baby. The first helicopter drop came from a sleigh. Keeps a list of naughty and nice, and seems to do nothing with it. Because economics isn’t a morality play.
peach flavored shampoo
Where’s ED Kain to tell me what to think? Has this guy officially gone galt?
Chris
Robin Hood poses a similar dilemma to conservatives. On the one hand, he’s stealing from the rich and giving to the poor, which is eebil – on the other hand, he’s fighting against tax hikes from the central government in London. So, Robin Hood, socialist or teabagger? Discuss.
As for Santa, that’s a tough one. But a true social conservative would probably say he’s taking too much worship away from Teh Jesus.
Roy G
Santa is a pro-Christian bigot, as he’s supposed to only deliver toys to Jesus people. No toys for you brown and yellow people worshipping false idols!
On the side, I had to do some research into the meaning of Christmas colors; the Christian view is that Red symbolizes the blood of Christ, which apparently means that Santa wears a fur suit fully stained with the blood of the savior – Ho, Ho Ho!
Loneoak
Santa originally moved to the North Pole because his old home town created a state-sanctioned monopoly for trash collection. He could not abide with this reduction in Freedom, and left for the one place that had no zoning laws.
West of the Cascades
@peach flavored shampoo: Indeedy — please either get ED Kain and ABL posting again or put up links to where they post under “Blogs John Reads.”
— Too Lazy to Google in Portland +2
MikeJ
Santa owns 6 to 8 black men. Of course he’s a republican.
Joey Maloney
@Loneoak: The midden behind the elves’ workshop is appalling. Any nanny state would declare it a toxic hazard due to all the empty pots from lead-based paint, if nothing else.
The smell would be enough to knock over eight full-size reindeer, were the temperatures not always so cold.
noncarborundum
@dj spellchecka:
After the exam, the receptionist presents the elf with the bill, and he says, “Is it all right if I don’t pay today? I’m a little short.”
cs
Conservatives love Santa but, depending on which conservative you ask, they love him for different reasons.
True believer dittoheads love Santa because he reaffirms their worldview. If you’re “good” then you’ll get candy and toys some day, unlike the “bads” who end up with nothing or just coal. They tend to ignore the fact that they haven’t actually received anything from Santa yet but know their day is coming. And that day is going to come soon and come hard, since they’ve been oh-so good: reading the right books, being a member of the correct race, believing the things only the good believe in. All the others are going to cry and cry when they get nothing but coal while the good kids laugh and laugh and play with their new toys. And, no, they’re not going to share them.
For those people who direct their conservative flock via Congress or the media, or write turgid screeds for think tanks, or donate tons to keep the conservative movement going, they all love Santa too. Santa is good for keeping the useful idiots in line. Privately, they don’t actually believe in him, but publicly they’ll declare their unwavering dedication and attack anyone who points out that the gifts under the tree actually came from Mum and Dad instead of some obese, chimney-loving white guy. And to keep the kids in line, they’ll loudly point out how Santa is a good conservative despite the fact that his supposed actions are pure altruism, and therefore contradictory to Randian and right-wing ideology. Definitely don’t want the idiots to wake up one day and realize Santa is more akin to liberals than their own movement.
And there’s some interesting and unintended side effects. More and more kids will reject the very idea of Santa Claus since they hear rhetoric every day about how he wants more spankings given to the naughty and how he was positively thrilled about invading Iraq. Rhetoric given with a straight face that completely contradicts the concept of a jolly old guy who just wants to give out toys and candy. The numbers of kids who will care about Santa in the slightest will become quite small one day and what few remain will be those who have bought into this claustrophobic dream of a man who smiles at his few little ones and beats the hell out of the rest, and those who want to lead those few believing kids off of a cliff.
Triassic Sands
Climate change (global warming aspect) is going to shut down Santa’s workshop and force him to move to Georgia or Texas. I predict that will be the end of Christmas as we know it. Of course, there will be a bidding war as state’s try to undercut one another with attractive benefits for Santa; he’ll get a non-union workshop, slash wages, cut benefits, and drag down the standard of living in whichever state finally lands him by selling out the rest of their current residents.
Sad, but inevitable.
Belvoir
The NYT had an article about how this is the first year since 2001 that no major studio has put out a Christmas picture for the holidays, something that’s usually a profitable no-brainer with annual returns. (It was interesting- holiday films have a very delicate time frame- any delay in production and it has to be put back to next year).
But this sounds godawful depressing:
“Otherwise, it’s a matter of waiting for Hollywood to get its holiday groove back. That will happen, Mr. Dergarabedian predicted, on Nov. 23, 2011, when Sony Pictures expects to release its “Arthur Christmas.” It is an animated extravaganza, in 3-D, about toys and elves and a high-tech distribution operation based at the North Pole.”
So, Santa as Wal-Mart or something. High-tech fulfillment centers! Just heartwarming and imaginative, Santa’s conglomerate. Ugh.
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/12/25/movies/25grinch.html?ref=arts
Oh, and Merry Christmas to all!
de stijl
The secret that no one wants you to know is that the Santa Industrial Complex is built on a lie.
Think about it. The business model is unsustainable.
The fixed costs are enormous, the logistics are a nightmare, only one distribution channel, and order fulfillment is incredibly inefficient (a sleigh? Really, a god damned sleigh? Gimme a friggin’ break!)
And, then, he gets paid in – wait for it – milk and cookies! Even if Santa were to resell the stuff on the secondary market, he would swamp the market and get pennies on the dollar. You can’t repeal the law of supply and demand, people.
He’s barely making payroll off his personal line of credit, and you can’t string out your suppliers forever.
Santa’s workshop is made of fluffernutter and KY Jelly, and built upon a foundation of aspic and discarded breast implants.
FlipYrWhig
@Belvoir:
That sounds a LOT like the commercials for UPS hymning the virtues of “logistics.”
Chris Wolf
@General Stuck:
The Elves have to work until they’re 350 years old, so their Social Security pool is pretty sound.
different church-lady
He knows if you’ve been bad or good, so meritocracy is supposedly built into the system.
Roy G
Santa is also a benevolent introduction to the Surveillance State, and pervasive spying on citizens.
“Santa is Always Watching!”
asiangrrlMN
Definitely conservative. Does he do any of the actual work himself? No. The elves make the toys. The reindeer pull the sled. He works one freaking day of the year. He crams himself down the chimney, drops off the presents, eats the cookies and drinks the milk, and gets all the glory. He’s like the CEO of a major bank.
JayR
Why is Santa at the North Pole, anyway? You know it is all about the cheap elf labor and the lax environmental regulations.
And what does he do with all that data he collects? He knows when you are sleeping and awake? He knows if you’ve been bad or good? Does he keep this data private or does he sell it on to other companies? Has to be the potential for some serious coin there.
mitch
Silly Doug, doesn’t he realize that Santa is the ultimate target of conservatives? Notice that when they talk about the “War on Christmas”, they never mention Santa Claus. Oh no, be warned my commie friend: Once the War is won, and we are all forced every morning and evening to turn to the American flag and say “Merry Christmas”, then they will start the next phase of their plan. They will start complaining that all this hoopla about Santa is taking attention away from the real Reason for the Season; that atheists are trying to create a false god who will lead the children astray and try to force liberal ideas in their head like peace and good will to others; that Santa is really a dirty old man who gets thrills out of having children sit on his lap. IT’S TRUE!! I READ IT ON THE INTERTUBES!!
Chris
The solution is to tie presents to standardized test scores.
PPOG Penguin
@asiangrrlMN: Even more so, because it’s not even Santa who pays for the presents: no, it’s the parents who end up footing the bill.
Comrade Baron Elmo
Can’t think of any wingnutty takes on Santa, but does anyone have a link to the article — from last year, if memory serves — by some libertarian asshole who praises Ebenezer Scrooge? I recall that he goes on about what a ungrateful looter Bob Cratchit was to complain about Scrooge’s office being so cold.
Chuck Butcher
One would have to wonder about the cumulative effect of this Klaus guy’s behavior. In all probability the crash of 08 is a direct outgrowth of his interference with the invisible hand of the Market. This really ought to be investigated at the highest levels of Congress… Issa should get on it.
pjcamp
When John Galt withdraws his productive capacity, Santa Claus will collapse into the dustbin of history like the parasite he is.
DPirate
So long as the “Nice” list doesn’t include anyone they know is “Naughty”, then they have no problem with Mr. Kringle.
The Raven
You do know that serious, died-in-the-wool Christian conservatives don’t like C. S. Lewis, right? He was far too influenced by those pagan Greek and Roman philosophers.
…I suppose they think Santa Claus is a pagan survival, too. Who knows? They may be right.
Sasha
Best response I’ve seen so far (from an unrelated topic at http://www.peterdavid.net/index.php/2010/12/24/if-it-happened-now/comment-page-1/#comment-250704):
Hi, Gang. Have you seen the news stories about this supposed “Virginia O’Hanlon” letter from the other day? I have. And it got me thinking about how I’ve been letting you down by not talking about one of the great truths I should have talked about a long time ago.
Gosh, I’ve prayed and prayed over this. I’ve struggled with this because I knew that this would be unpopular. But, gosh darn it, the truth has to be told at some point no matter how much some people will attack me for it.
Today we’re going to discuss… Santa Claus.
Yes, that jolly old elf who comes once a year with gifts for all. You ask Santa for what you want and he gives it to you. You don’t have to work for it. You don’t have to pay for it. He just… gives it to you.
My God, am I the only one who sees the insidious nature of this? Am I the only one who recognizes the danger in this? Well, it seems that I am, but come with me, gang, and I’ll show you what’s wrong with Santa Claus.
Santa Claus, my friends, was one of the most insidious creations of the early progressive movement. They knew that they had to get them while they’re young… get them while their minds could be molded and twisted with ease. And what better way to do it than to convince children that they could essentially get something for nothing out of life?
Santa Claus had existed before his transformation by the early progressives of the 20th Century, but the Santa you see before then was vastly different than the Santa Commie who came after and became ingrained in the public consciousness. And like so many things it traces it’s roots back to… Woodrow Wilson.
You see, Woodrow Wilson had a good friend who ran the New York Times and another who ran the Saturday Evening Post. With their help he was able to create the image and the idea that the early progressives needed. The two papers began to run pictures around Christmas time of a newer image of Santa. But even here they couldn’t help but gloat as they hid their true intent in plain sight. Santa wore many outfits before then with many colors of clothing. He wore white, green, brown and even black. But the progressives Santa? Red. Communist red.
And so the story was being pushed even harder now onto the public. Christmas was no longer about Jesus. It was about a kindly old man with a white beard who would come into your lives and give you whatever you wanted whether you actually earned it or not. Hmmm… Now why does that sound like something else… We’ll get back to that.
Now there was of course resistance to this bastardization of Santa Claus and Christmas. America had just seen the results of fascism up close in Europe and wanted no part of that ideology. We elected Harding and Coolidge in an effort to undo the damage being done by the early American Progressives, but they were hard at work in other areas.
Enter Coca-Cola. In 1927 the Coca-Cola Company entered the war on American values by taking Santa Commie and making him their annual Christmas advertising campaign. So effective was this campaign that people today actually believe that Coca-Cola created the modern image we have of Santa. Oh, how I wish it were that innocent.
By 1933 we had elected uber-progressive Franklin Roosevelt into office. With the progressives back in power and the Great Depression on the horizon the Santa agenda was pushed harder than ever and the Coca-Cola campaign went into high gear.
Now, you may be asking yourselves what they hoped to accomplish with this. What could they have hoped to achieve back then with such a simple device? As I’ve told you many times before, the progressives don’t do things for immediate results. They know that they would be rejected outright so they work slowly, meticulously and take away from true American values bit by bit over time. Stay with me and you’ll understand how this is being used today and what image is slowly being used to advance the agenda.
The Great Depression hit in full force and the progressives went into high gear with their “Santa Plan.” All around you people were seeing what they were told was a failure of Capitalism. No one was telling them that this was a carefully constructed depression caused by the progressives. But a lot of people were telling their kids every Christmas to believe in Santa.
Capitalism was “failing” all around them and the children only understood that the system was hurting mommy and daddy. But along comes Christmas and a jolly old man with a beard who just… gives you things. Don’t worry about working for something or paying for something was the message. There was a man who would come in and give you what you couldn’t afford to buy for yourself.
And parents were encouraged to tell their children to go and “ask Santa” for what they wanted. Children are so innocent and sweet. They asked Santa whenever they could. Some of them even sent letters and some would ask Santa before bedtime for the gifts they wanted; almost… praying to Santa.
And so, throughout the hard times engineered by the early American progressives, it was reinforced in the children to look for a handout every December 25th to make up for the hard times they were going through the rest of the year. They couldn’t afford it and they thought their parents couldn’t afford it, but here comes Santa Claus to “redistribute the wealth.”
Do you see the insidious nature in this yet, gang?
You have progressives pushing this false idol into the minds of the children. When they want something, something they can’t get and think mommy and daddy can’t get them, they even… pray to this false idol. And the progressives have rigged the popular culture to encourage parents to encourage their children to do this. If you’re a good parent you… lie to your children. No, you don’t tell them that life is hard or that you sometimes have to sacrifice want you want to live within your means. No, you lie to them and tell them that they can get something for nothing by praying to an old man with a beard and and he’ll just… give it to you. he’ll come along and make it all better.
Now let’s fast forward over the decades. The progressives slowly imposed their will on other areas of life. They did things that were all for “our own good.”
One of these things has been the Health-Nazi movement that we’ve been seeing so much more of lately. How does this tie in to Santa? Let me tell you.
Slowly, over time, the progressives have changed the popular image of so many things to make them “more healthy and acceptable.” Have you seen a modern picture of Santa? He’s being slimmed down. Universities, the factories of progressive thought, have even issues papers on why a fat Santa would be in poor health. Slowly the jolly old elf with a belly like a bowl full of jelly has been getting transformed into… a thinner old man with a beard.
Here’s where the image issue I mentioned when discussing the Coca-Cola campaign comes into play and you see the long term planning that the progressives use.
They’ve engineered another great “failure” of the capitalist system just in time for the most liberal progressive administration ever to come in and “transform” our country. And the biggest support he has is from the youth movement. Coincidence? Don’t count on it.
You see, the youth of today have grown up believing that a man with a beard would just give them the wealth they wanted if they just asked for it. They’ve also been been disillusioned by their parents telling them lies when they were young. This was an important part of the plan you see as now when their parents try and tell them that you can’t have something for nothing and that you can’t just expect someone to give you something… Well, that goes against what mommy and daddy told them when they were young and, hey, mommy and daddy lied to you before so why believe them now.
No, you turn to the old thin guy with a beard for help. You turn to that comforting figure with your hand out. You turn to that thin old man with a beard who promises you something for nothing like mommy and daddy said he would give. You turn willingly and hopefully towards… Your Uncle Sam.
One hundred years in the making and the most insidious progressive plot ever. From the early days of American progressives like Woodrow Wilson to the man who sits in office now, Barrack Obama. They’ve conditioned our youth for the ultimate handout artist; Uncle Santa Sam.
The point and tell us that capitalism is failing and the health system is failing and the regulatory system is too week and that all the answers are found in the man with the white beard; Uncle Sam. From Santa to Sam in one hundred years. That’s how long they worked and that’s how evil their tricks are. Indoctrinating generations of children and getting society to lose sight of the true meaning of Christmas.
But now you know. Now I’ve told you the truth and the truth will set you free. Now you can go and tell others. Please, I am begging you; tell others and let them know the truth as well.
And tomorrow when you wake up on Christmas morning you can celebrate it by remembering the true meanings of that day. Spend time with your family. Spend time with your loved ones. Spend time with your friends. And give the gifts that really count. Give the gifts that really mean something. Give the gifts that will be there for them when the revolution and the collapse come. Go to my website today and enter the code “ChritmasGlenn” to get special deals on all your Christmas needs and half off of overnight delivery. Yes, tomorrow morning you can be sharing the gifts that last; the gifts that mean something. You too can be sharing cold coins, freeze dried food and the best survival packs money can by just like I do.
Merry Christmas, gang, and have a Happy new Year.