The Government Caused the Oil Spill After They Slept With Your Girlfriend, Stole Your Bike, And Kicked Your Dog
Just so stupid it hurts. Reading Ed Morrisey these days is like reading Being There
July 30, 2010 4:52 pm
Posted in: Bring on the Brawndo!, Teabagger Stupidity
51 Comments
51 Responses
Belafon (formerly anonevent) - July 30, 2010 | 4:55 pm · Link
I think he’s just trying to win the dinner award. Ed, it’s only a movie!
Spaghetti Lee - July 30, 2010 | 4:56 pm · Link
Pointless contrarianism ahoy!
GregB - July 30, 2010 | 5:00 pm · Link
Blacks are the new Jews in the Protocols of the Elders of Zimbabwe.
*Sponsored by Goldline, promoted by Glenn Beck.
Ben - July 30, 2010 | 5:01 pm · Link
The republicans are venal and stupid. See Cheney, Dick. I seriously just want to move to another country. Between the rethugs and the jesus freaks, this place is going to shit in a hurry.
Fred Fnord - July 30, 2010 | 5:01 pm · Link
OT, but just wanted to apologize. I didn’t realize that me signing my posts (—fred, except with a normal hyphen) was causing people’s browsers to blow up. All it does on mine is cross out my name, which I find amusing.
Unfortunately, since I’ve been frequenting chat boards/BBSes since 1984 or so, and signing basically everything with that since then, I doubt I’m going to be able to train myself not to do so anytime soon. But I can certainly stop posting on Balloon Juice, and I’ll do so, at least until this amazingly stupid misfeature is removed.
Again, sorry about that.
eric - July 30, 2010 | 5:03 pm · Link
Who’s the black private dick
That’s a sex machine to all the chicks?
(Obama!)
You’re damn right.
Seriously, no one has ever had the power and tentacles of this Mad Kenyan.
Tom Hilton - July 30, 2010 | 5:04 pm · Link
Yup. The government also caused the economic meltdown, 9/11, and the earthquake in Haiti. And while we don’t admit there is such a thing as climate change, if it did exist it would be caused by the government. Thank God we have Grover Norquist to save us from this scourge!
El Tiburon - July 30, 2010 | 5:09 pm · Link
What’s a wing-nut to do these days?
You have Glenn Beck sucking all the crazy-juice his way.
The lower-rung wingers have to do something to remain relevant to the frothing fanatics.
In a nutshell: Obama faked his US birth in order to become a facist-socialist Dictator of the US in order to bring Sharia Law and OBL here while causing the largest oil-spill in the history of the world.
El Cruzado - July 30, 2010 | 5:11 pm · Link
Hiroshima was an inside job!
(makes about as much sense to me).
licensed to kill time - July 30, 2010 | 5:12 pm · Link
@Fred Fnord:
There’s no reason for you to stop posting here, just drop the sign-off (which is hardly necessary, since your name appears at the top of your comment). You did it this time, you can do it again!
ETA: It’s the government that makes you sign off that way, ya know.
double edit: CURSE YOU scarshaped star! you HAD to go there!
Omnes Omnibus - July 30, 2010 | 5:13 pm · Link
@Tom Hilton: The government caused my presentation that was scheduled for Tuesday to be rescheduled for September 7th and it caused me to get my AMEX bill today. It, however, had nothing to do with the fact that I felt pretty good during my run today.
scarshapedstar - July 30, 2010 | 5:15 pm · Link
@Fred Fnord:
You certainly piqued my curiosity. I can report that I saw the strikethrough AND it screwed up my browser.
I sure hope this information doesn’t fall into the wrong hands…
Sentient Puddle - July 30, 2010 | 5:19 pm · Link
Even if I were smocking crack rock and decided that today was a good day to think that this was a reasonable point, it would still fly in the face of reality:
Deepwater Horizon worker: Fire alarm was intentionally disabled before explosion
Kinda hard to coordinate firefighting efforts when the fucking alarm isn’t working, innit?
licensed to kill time - July 30, 2010 | 5:28 pm · Link
@scarshapedstar:
The thing is, unless the original poster or a front pager sees the problem and edits out the hyphen, the thread is killed for everyone, not just the OP. Did you see how the whole page got rearranged and there was no comment box anymore? A thread can stay like that for hours or forever.
No More Hyphen Bombs! They are not healthy for the Commentariat or other living things.
SpotWeld - July 30, 2010 | 5:29 pm · Link
I clicked the link and read some of the comments…
It’s like everyone there activly avoided any news reports of what has actually happening in the gulf and only know reality though references within right-wing opinion pieces.
J - July 30, 2010 | 5:29 pm · Link
I like how BP’s procedures were “non-standard” and not “corner cutting”, “dangerous”, or “criminally negligent”.
Zuzu's Petals - July 30, 2010 | 5:32 pm · Link
As near as I can tell, the critique of the USCG is that they failed to appoint a fire marshal to coordinate the firefighting effort. Other than that, firefighting and “getting proper resources” don’t appear to be the USCG’s duty. So Ed is full of crap per usual.
My son agrees with the conventional wisdom that the heat probably burned off the protective grates and one or more of the arms filled with water, sinking the rig. On the other hand, it seems to me the rig would have eventually disintegrated and sunk anyway, as the fire was being fed by gas coming up the pipe.
Southern Beale - July 30, 2010 | 5:32 pm · Link
Erick Erickson also had a post up about the government causing the oil spill. Ran 2 days ago.
This will be one of those wingnutty pieces of lore like the Obama Birth Certificate and the Secret Muslim thing. It will circulate around to your in-laws’ e-mail boxes and on right wing blogs until finally the MSM will decide since “everyone” is talking about it they must too.
Oy. America makes my head hurt.
sherparick - July 30, 2010 | 5:35 pm · Link
If you go to the actual Center for Public Integrity article and read it, you find out that the owner of the rig, Transocean, was running the firefighting operation and contracted to have the private boats to come out and conduct the firefighting operations, not the Coast Guard. In spinning this as a deep, White House conspiracy (“what did Obama know and when did he know it”), Mr. Morrissey again shows the movement conservative’s addiction to the lie in the service of “truthiness.”
TR - July 30, 2010 | 5:48 pm · Link
I like the use of what the Daily Show calls “The Cavuto”—an inflammatory argument phrased as a question for the purposes of deniability.
Like: “Is Ed Morrisey the Offspring of First Cousins Having Sex?”
El Cid - July 30, 2010 | 5:49 pm · Link
The government? I thought it was ACORN and the Sierra Club. Or are they just the patsies?
fucen tarmal - July 30, 2010 | 5:51 pm · Link
i have to start my own think tank…the center for emotional honesty. its dedicating to putting out stories to confirm things that people who sponsor us, want very much to be true.
Roger Moore - July 30, 2010 | 5:57 pm · Link
@SpotWeld:
Fixt. It’s not as though this is a phenomenon that is limited to the mess in the gulf or that web site. This is what got the whole “epistemic closure” business started.
RSA - July 30, 2010 | 5:59 pm · Link
I realize that this is within the purview of the Coast Guard, and that they have policies for such things, but my first thought was, “Yeah, the Coast Guard probably spends an enormous amount of its training budget on fighting gigantic fires. What could have gone wrong?”
Also, Ed doesn’t seem to have a clear understanding of the word “cause”.
New Yorker - July 30, 2010 | 6:24 pm · Link
@RSA:
Anyone want to ask Ed if he thinks the FDNY “caused” the WTC towers to collapse because of a “botched response” to the fires in the towers?
RSR - July 30, 2010 | 6:39 pm · Link
just jealous of the 9/11 truthers
They’re always playing catch-up, be it the Greatest Generation or Netroots Nation…
Bob L - July 30, 2010 | 6:44 pm · Link
@Fred Fnord: This guy say anything in his post? For some reason I can’t remember.
Comrade Dread - July 30, 2010 | 6:53 pm · Link
Damn. I knew it was the gubmit. Even when it was the immigrants.
South of I-10 - July 30, 2010 | 6:55 pm · Link
So let me get this straight. Because the Coast Guard didn’t instantly procur a shipful of fire retardant foam to spray on the rig, they are now responsible? Small government indeed. Maybe BP should have lined up a contractor before their shoddy operation blew up the well.
New Yorker - July 30, 2010 | 7:23 pm · Link
@RSR:
It’s fun to make a wingnut squirm with 9/11 truth. When my crazy uncle sends me his stuff denying global warming or evolution, I usually point him in the direction of truther sites with a suggestion he join them and explain to him how they use the exact same style of “argument” as the global warming and evolution deniers.
burnspbesq - July 30, 2010 | 7:29 pm · Link
@sherparick:
TransOcean fucked up every bit as badly as BP, if not worse, and they are not getting the slagging they deserve.
Plus they screwed the US Treasury out of hundreds of millions of dollars in tax revenue by inverting just before the law changed to make inversions prohibitively expensive.
I do not like them, Sam I Am.
burnspbesq - July 30, 2010 | 7:32 pm · Link
@El Cid:
Naw, you’re confused. It was PETA and the Daughters of the American Revolution.
JITC - July 30, 2010 | 7:34 pm · Link
I suppose Morrissey believes response time was not at all affected by the purposefully disabled alarms on the rig.
burnspbesq - July 30, 2010 | 7:38 pm · Link
@JITC:
He blames The EPA for not realizing the alarms were disabled and hacking into TransOcean’s systems to bring them back on-line.
After all, CTU does that shit all the time.
Zuzu's Petals - July 30, 2010 | 7:47 pm · Link
@Sentient Puddle:
Actually, none of the hundreds of alarms on the DWH was disabled.
Even Williams said the alarms weren’t disabled, they were inhibited. This is standard industry practice – and I understand it’s true even on military ships. It just means the general audible alarm does not go off automatically. The alarms are all monitored 24 hours a day by two dynamic positioning operators keeping watch on the bridge; if an alarm is serious enough, the general audible alarm is sounded. Under certain conditions, such as if two alarms go off at the same time, or one goes off for a certain period of time, the general audible alarm is automatically sounded. And zone alarms are not inhibited.
My son has worked for several drilling and maritime companies, and has never been on a rig or vessel where the general audible alarms weren’t inhibited. Otherwise the dozens of false and minor alarms that go off every day would not only be a needless disruption but the crew would begin to ignore them altogether.
———————————-
Zuzu's Petals - July 30, 2010 | 7:50 pm · Link
@sherparick:
Right, and if you look at the search and rescue manual they’re talking about, you don’t see anything requiring the Coast Guard to coordinate the private firefighting efforts anyway.
HyperIon - July 30, 2010 | 7:51 pm · Link
Is he the guy who lost his BBQ grill in a storm and then did a fund raiser so he could buy another one? i can’t keep these idiots straight.
Zuzu's Petals - July 30, 2010 | 7:52 pm · Link
@JITC:
Aside from the fact the alarms weren’t disabled (see # 35), the response would not be to an onboard alarm but to a call put out from the bridge. Which is what happened.
HyperIon - July 30, 2010 | 7:55 pm · Link
@Zuzu’s Petals wrote:
very interesting.
why is this not mentioned in any of the articles i have seen about the alarms?
what you say really undercuts the outrage, no?
Zuzu's Petals - July 30, 2010 | 8:04 pm · Link
@HyperIon:
I don’t know why it isn’t reported more, except maybe it just doesn’t make for a sensational headline. Some of the articles did include Transocean’s statement, but that’s about all I’ve seen:
(Sorry about the multiple blockquotes, but can’t figure out how to do paragraphs.)
JITC - July 30, 2010 | 8:07 pm · Link
@Zuzu’s Petals:
Interesting. So, these alarms are DESIGNED to be partially inhibited? Or rigs regularly use them contrary to their design? Or the design is so terrible that there are so many false alarms that lead them to inhibit the alarms?
It is interesting that this is standard industry practice. In an industry with so many catastrophic disasters (see: Kalamazoo river, Nigeria, and more) it seems to me that they would want to not inhibit alarms. OR design alarms that both alert people immediately and let workers get their rest.
There are a lot of things that are “industry standard” that suck.
Disabled or inhibited, my point was simply that blaming the Coast Guard for a bungled response is dumb for all the reasons already pointed out, on top of the problems with alarm response on the rig itself.
Zuzu's Petals - July 30, 2010 | 8:16 pm · Link
@JITC:
I agree about the stupid comments about the Coast Guard.
I don’t know what else to say about the industry practice of inhibiting alarms, except to repeat that people are alerted immediately.
As far as designs go, I notice maritime alarm panels and consoles seem to be designed to include alarm inhibit mode.
Zuzu's Petals - July 30, 2010 | 8:25 pm · Link
@JITC:
PS:
I think there are all sorts of reasons for a false or minor alarm that have nothing to do with the design. For instance, if someone is welding in an area with an alarm, the alarm would be rightly activated…but the DPOs on the bridge would know about the welder and double check before sounding the general alarm.
BC - July 30, 2010 | 8:38 pm · Link
Typical conservative – if something bad happens, then the government is responsible. In Montana, the Republican congressman, Denny Rehberg, is suing the Billings, Montana, fire department because there was a wildfire near some of his landholdings and the fire department didn’t protect the trees on his property. No, really.
joe from Lowell - July 30, 2010 | 9:37 pm · Link
I had a nephew who once told his mother, “I want to poop in my diaper, and I want you to clean it!”
He had just turned two, and he didn’t have web site.
Pug - July 30, 2010 | 10:48 pm · Link
If there is a murder, it is the fault of the police department.
If there is a fire, it is the fault of the fire department.
And 9-11 was the fault of NYPD and FDNY. They didn’t get there fast enough to keep those buildings from falling down.
Notice that all these people are the government? Well . . . Obama runs the government, doesn’t he?
Why can’t you socialists see the truth?
Pug - July 30, 2010 | 10:50 pm · Link
Hey, did the government really sleep with my girlfriend?
Bill H - July 31, 2010 | 12:54 am · Link
Well, actually, it’s all the water they pumped onto it trying to put the fire out. Too much water. Flooded that sucker and sank it. What kind of idiot pumps all that water into a ship? Bailing is pumping water out of a ship.
Kered (formerly Derek) - July 31, 2010 | 11:08 am · Link
@Fred Fnord:
Oh, fuck you. Peace. Don’t let the door hit your ass on the way out.
Zuzu's Petals - July 31, 2010 | 4:21 pm · Link
@HyperIon:
More on the topic from professional mariners:
gCaptain
BTW, Williams was also wrong about the gas alarm not going off before the explosion. The chief mechanic, Doug Brown, testified in May that the gas alarms did go off, several times.
Southern - July 31, 2010 | 6:18 pm · Link
This is like the criminal case that just ended near here. A man got drunk, put some oil for frying on the stove, and fell asleep in the other room. The grease fire caused his five children to die from smoke inhalation, but he survived.
He blamed the fire department for not being able to save his children’s lives.