The Eternal Return
This picture could have been taken during the latter part of Reagan’s term, or during Bush I:
High waistline pleated pants? Check. Big-ass fugly belt? Check. Skinny model with real breasts? Check and check.
So, I guess millions of pairs of hip-huggers are now garbage?
Since I am obviously a moron about women’s fashion, I have another question: what about the tramp stamps and implants? Are they out of style, too?
July 14, 2010 10:29 am
Posted in: Get off my grass you damned kids
117 Comments
117 Responses
beltane - July 14, 2010 | 10:38 am · Link
Does this mean that we will no longer be exposed to the sight of overweight redneck girls wearing hip-huggers, their fat cascading over their jeans like a gelatinous waterfall? Oh, and the thongs, maybe now we won’t have to see ugly people’s underwear.
Sorry to be mean, but if you came to my town you’d know what I’m talking about.
But, uck, I really used to hate those high-waisted pleated pants, though I still have an old J.Crew circa 1990 sitting in my closet.
Violet - July 14, 2010 | 10:38 am · Link
The 80’s are back! Just waiting for big hair to make a return.
Don’t know about tramp stamps, but as for implants they’ve been trending out for awhile. See this NYT article.
and
Gunner Billy K - July 14, 2010 | 10:38 am · Link
I’m really hoping tattoos on women are out.
Then again, practically every woman my age has been inked at this point anyway.
Third Eye Open - July 14, 2010 | 10:40 am · Link
You will have to pry those saline-sacks from my cold, dead, engorged fingers.
Pixie - July 14, 2010 | 10:42 am · Link
Ew…yeah that looks like something circa 1981. The jeans and belt are what kills me. Who the hell says “you know what would look great with this light blue shirt?
MY YELLOW MOM JEANS AND SLIGHTLY OFF YELLOW BELT!”
aimai - July 14, 2010 | 10:44 am · Link
I can’t see American Apparel Ads without thinking of this:
Holly Norris’s work under the heading “American Able”
Really worth the click. Personally, although I detest people who begin sentences with personally, I find the “classic look” of the Ad just fine, but the model is downright hideous and out of proportion. That’s because her clothes aren’t designed for an actual woman, with breast and hips, and she looks uncomfortable wearing them.
aimai
Comrade Mary - July 14, 2010 | 10:46 am · Link
Pleated pants favour only the skinny. No one, male or female, with any hint of bodyfat should wear pleats EVER. They aren’t more comfortable at all compared to a well-fitting pair of flat-front trousers.
Meanwhile, I recently switched from bikini undies to boy shorts, and really pine for proper women’s boxer briefs, but even Hanes doesn’t make those any more. Not only are they cute, they’re dead comfy, especially when you’re on a bike in street clothes. Avoiding the line of elastic right in the crease where thigh meets body is a godsend.
Omnes Omnibus - July 14, 2010 | 10:46 am · Link
Madame Omnibus has a pair of plaid bermuda shorts that strongly resemble those worn by preppy sorority girls at my university in the early 80s – way before her day. It is all coming back. Woohoo!
Alice Blue - July 14, 2010 | 10:47 am · Link
I don’t know about implants and tattoos, but I work for a fairly upscale women’s clothing store, and nothing that we have in stock looks remotely like this.
beltane - July 14, 2010 | 10:48 am · Link
@Violet: The actresses do look all the same these days. Any traces of individuality or actual beauty have been surgically scoured and chemically embalmed into oblivion.
When my grandfather died we inherited a pack of nudie playing cards from the 1950’s. My friends have commented how gorgeous and natural the models’ bodies were back then compared to the silicon sculptures you see today.
atlliberal - July 14, 2010 | 10:50 am · Link
If it doesn’t look good on the model, chances are I wouldn’t be caught dead in it. I can’t help thinking other women feel the same way. I don’t see this as a trend. Of course I’ve never been very “trendy”
randiego - July 14, 2010 | 10:52 am · Link
Vote of approval for boy shorts – very sexy
implants will never be out of style if you ask me
some thing should never be brought back. what’s next, members only jackets?
beltane - July 14, 2010 | 10:52 am · Link
@Omnes Omnibus: Remember the Blucher moccasins and the fair isle sweaters? And those black & white LL Bean Norwegian fisherman’s sweaters? Now I’m remembering why I rebelled and became a hippie in high school (class of ‘86).
ET - July 14, 2010 | 10:53 am · Link
@atlliberal: AMEN.
Some styles should never come back. Ever. But isn’t fashion where the say “everything old is new again”? And we say Hollywood is derivative.
YellowJournalism - July 14, 2010 | 10:55 am · Link
The little girl in me would be giddy to see Madonna-style floppy hair bows. The adult in me would never admit it, though.
Tata - July 14, 2010 | 10:55 am · Link
American Apparel is Dov Charney’s gross little fiefdom. Bad juju.
Omnes Omnibus - July 14, 2010 | 10:56 am · Link
@beltane: The L.L.Bean Norwegian sweater is navy and white and I have one in my closet. I tend to dress a bit WASPy.
beltane - July 14, 2010 | 10:59 am · Link
@randiego: I never, ever, ever thought bell bottoms would make a comeback. When I was a kid they were considered the ugliest, dorkiest, most irredeemable form of clothing out there. And yet they returned with a vengeance. People can be persuaded to wear just about anything if it’s marketed well enough.
salacious crumb - July 14, 2010 | 10:59 am · Link
and yes, all American means only having white ladies, more specifically blondes to grace your ad.
Comrade Sock Puppet of the Great Satan - July 14, 2010 | 11:00 am · Link
If we can’t make implants out of fashion, now that we havea communist dictatorial health system, can’t Michelle get Obama to make them illegal?
Legal abortion, illegal boobjobs!
Steaming Pile - July 14, 2010 | 11:02 am · Link
@beltane: You only need to go to Wal-Mart. Driving out to the sticks is unnecessary.
And I suspect the high-waisted pleated slacks are to hide the ill-advised tramp stamp. And not everybody can afford fake boobs. Now, if only Chrysler would bring back the Plymouth Reliant, we’d be all set.
Steaming Pile - July 14, 2010 | 11:06 am · Link
@Comrade Mary: You mean bloomers? Oh, hell yeah.
PeakVT - July 14, 2010 | 11:07 am · Link
what about the tramp stamps and implants? Are they out of style, too?
I certainly hope so. Also: overly tweezed eyebrows and lip injections.
I blame all of these abominations on Pam Anderson.
Rosalita - July 14, 2010 | 11:11 am · Link
Personally, I love the lower rise jeans—hate having high waisted pants choking my waist. But I agree with Beltane, I’m tired of looking at muffin tops and the skin tight shirts that accentuate all the other rolls of fat. Doesn’t anybody look in the mirror?
I’d welcome big hair and the fun makeup again however
moe99 - July 14, 2010 | 11:13 am · Link
hip huggers do not favor any but skinny women.
All my pants are coming back. Yay!
Bill Murray - July 14, 2010 | 11:13 am · Link
I thought they used 80s clothes because that was the last era when many clothes were made in America, and that’s all American Apparel had around
D. Mason - July 14, 2010 | 11:15 am · Link
You know. Just because you have front page posting abilities on a popular blog doesn’t mean you need to share every random thought that pops into your head.
Angelos - July 14, 2010 | 11:15 am · Link
What picture?
Ab_Normal - July 14, 2010 | 11:16 am · Link
I lived through the 80’s once already (class of ‘84) and while I’m happy that DEVO has a new album out, otherwise I’d just like to leave the rest of it behind me.
JustMe - July 14, 2010 | 11:16 am · Link
Pleated pants are only appropriate when worn as part of a suit. There should never be a time when your pleats are exposed to the light of day, as they should be covered by your jacket/blazer. Even then, you will come across as a guy who is socially/professionally obligated to wear a “conservative suit.”
I considered it a healthy fashion purge when I went through my closet and got rid of all my pleated pants that weren’t part of a suit.
Skirts can have pleats, though. Especially if they’re plaid, above the knee, and being worn to an indie rock concern. Rawr.
LittlePig - July 14, 2010 | 11:18 am · Link
@randiego: what’s next, members only jackets?
I got one for Christmas back in the early 90’s and still wear it (hey, it fits and is a nice medium weight). Perhaps the laughing and pointing will stop soon!
R-Jud - July 14, 2010 | 11:18 am · Link
@Tata:
Seriously. I used to buy basic t-shirts and stuff from them, because they were reasonably long in the waist and made in the USA. That was before I looked up “douchebag” in the dictionary and saw Dov’s picture next to the definition.
mistermix, this rewarmed 80’s preppy stuff is what certain teenagers/new college grads will be wearing.
And possibly my Mom, but she’s been dressing like that since forever. Unlike the model, however, Mom always wears a bra.
Laura Clawson - July 14, 2010 | 11:20 am · Link
@moe99
Actually, high-waisted pants are worse on heavier people.
Also miserably uncomfortable.
Toast - July 14, 2010 | 11:27 am · Link
As a confirmed Ass Man, I will cheer the death of the low-rise hip-hugger. Those things can make a great ass look dumpy and a not-so-great ass look like something that belongs to a 400-lb construction worker. Yes, high-waisted pants can veer too far the other way, but given the two extremes they’re vastly preferable.
beltane - July 14, 2010 | 11:27 am · Link
@Laura Clawson: Why can’t we have jeans that hang comfortably just below the waist? Why do these designers veer from one extreme to another? It’s like someone is on a mission to make American women look ridiculous.
sven - July 14, 2010 | 11:29 am · Link
@beltane: A friend of my mom’s once made this comment:
“Why are bell bottoms back? Because there are only so many ways to cut pants.”
Just like political journalists push creaky narrative because the headline “Economy Sucks; Obama less popular” can’t run every single day, the fashion world can’t say “It’s been X years, I guess it is time for pleats again.”
Chat Noir - July 14, 2010 | 11:31 am · Link
@beltane:
Amen to this. I am tired of the tight-fitting, skanky looking styles that permeate fashion for women. And I’ll be the first to admit I wish some of the styles from the 80s would come back (I like higher waisted pants because, for me, they are much more comfortable than the low-riders). The big hair? Not so much.
I just want to find clothes that won’t look dated in a year or two. My summer wardrobe consists of stuff I’ve had for the past 12-15 years because I can’t find anything in stores now that I like (and because stuff from the mid 90s had more classic styling to it). I’m a hopeless preptoid.
And I would love to see flip-flops go away completely, unless you’re at the beach or at a pool.
I’m 43 and I don’t want to dress like a 21 year old.
Tyler - July 14, 2010 | 11:33 am · Link
American Apparel’s core business is selling basic t’s and what not At the wholesale level they have been getting crushed for the past year by a company called Alternative Apparel (made in Georgia). With there core business model being gutted, they have no choice but to try to expand into tailored offerings. And since they’re entire design asthetic is based on penthouse magazine 1974-1986, this is what you get. It won’t work.
I’m in the biz and this is not the dominant trend by any means. Late 50’s/early 60’s with a dash of 30’s are the trends. And skinny pants/leggings aren’t going anywhere.
RobertB - July 14, 2010 | 11:33 am · Link
Do I need more coffee? Because that doesn’t look all that hideous to me. I mean, it doesn’t look great, but I wouldn’t run away screaming.
Athenae - July 14, 2010 | 11:34 am · Link
This. I wish someone had told me when I was 14 that garish makeup, high-waisted pants and big hair were NOT my look. I would have had a whole different life.
The thing about pleated tapered pants is they make you look round in the middle which is where most people already are round (including me). Ultra-low-rise is problematic, too, but a nice straight trouser that sits a little lower than your natural waist really is best if you have hips.
This kind of shit is what made me wear vintage for so long. Back when they knew how to dress women, not 14-year-old boys. Come back, Adolph Schuman, your country needs you!
A.
ps. Mmmm, tattoos. On men, women, pets, whatever, it’s all hot.
Violet - July 14, 2010 | 11:38 am · Link
@Athenae:
Agreed. Women’s clothes are made for stick figures, not real women. And women today are heavier and curvier and that means different styles again. Very few women can wear stick figure clothing and look even remotely good in it.
Dork - July 14, 2010 | 11:40 am · Link
@Comrade Mary: is it wrong to say that, as written, this was unintentionally hawt?
Morbo - July 14, 2010 | 11:41 am · Link
As always, great title.
Michael - July 14, 2010 | 11:46 am · Link
I like low rise hip huggers, thongs and tramp stamps on women, but that’s just how I roll.
Give me “slightly trashy” any day of the week.
Lee - July 14, 2010 | 11:49 am · Link
Where is the picture?
Chrome blocks the image for some reason.
Opera lets it thru.
Joel - July 14, 2010 | 11:49 am · Link
The 80s are back for sure. Picked up a few 50/50 shirts for myself and I daresay they’re awesome.
Punchy - July 14, 2010 | 11:49 am · Link
I cant believe she’s not wearing parachute pants.
catclub - July 14, 2010 | 11:53 am · Link
@Athenae:
“This. I wish someone had told me when I was 14 that garish makeup, high-waisted pants and big hair were NOT my look. I would have had a whole different life.”
I have a strong suspicion someone did, but it was your mother, and you weren’t exactly listening.
debbie - July 14, 2010 | 12:01 pm · Link
Tom Ford (designed for Gucci) was interviewed on NPR when his movie “A Single Man” came out. He couldn’t believe how hard and mean women’s fashion had become over the past decade, from rock-hard breasts to practically unwearable (not to mention, ugly) shoes. An industry that used to celebrate women now tortures them.
Pleated, high-waist pants were very popular back when I clerked at Filene’s in the early 1970s. I guess you can’t go wrong when you try to make a woman look like a man.
Jules - July 14, 2010 | 12:07 pm · Link
So i guess this is what that skive Dov Charney finds hot now?
Joel - July 14, 2010 | 12:08 pm · Link
@Tata: I couldn’t give a crap.
Hob - July 14, 2010 | 12:12 pm · Link
...with real breasts? Check and check.
You had to check them off separately? Like maybe one was real and one was fake?
Then again, if single implants do become fashionable during my lifetime I guess I won’t be surprised.
As for the model’s body type—I guess you don’t live in an area where there’s always an American Apparel ad on the back of the weekly paper, showing what appears to be a kidnap victim lounging around in a scrap of fabric in between her weekly feedings in an abandoned mine. Compared to that, this lady looks like an NFL quarterback—with D-cups—lit by the light of a thousand suns.
Raenelle - July 14, 2010 | 12:13 pm · Link
The colors are 80s colors too, also. Pinks, and oranges, and limes—but without any conviction, just washed out and put together. Ugh.
I can’t wait for the shoulder pads. If you’re dressed in puke-ugly colors, you might as well have the shape of an 18 year-old boy.
Tyler - July 14, 2010 | 12:14 pm · Link
Re: clothes for real women. The clothing industry is not irrationally small women centric. 64% of women aged 25-45 (target age range for most popular brands) weigh 110-170lbs. That is size 2-14. A clothing company can only make so many sku’s efficiently so the long tail of the size curve gets ignored. It is not a conspiracy. We don’t hate women. I think most people would be shocked at the range of sizes you see on the wholesale side. I work with far more size 6-12 women then thin sticks. Though even the thin sticks can’t make the high waist pleated pant look good.
Jay in Oregon - July 14, 2010 | 12:14 pm · Link
@Angelos:
If you have an ad blocker, check the settings.
Mine was blocking the image because it fit the horizontal and vertical dimensions for a web ad. (Surprise, surprise!)
Here is a direct link: http://www.balloon-juice.com/w.....250_03.jpg
trollhattan - July 14, 2010 | 12:19 pm · Link
As the father of an 8 YO grrl I’m sincerely counting on this. I’m expecting a tattoo-and-hardware-in-flesh backlash from her generation similar to the punks and mods backlash against all things hippie.
Any day now, m-kay?
Somewhat related, a friend who’s an independent televsion producer is now telling agencies to not bother sending anybody with tattoos to casting calls. He’s done with removing them, either digitally or via makeup.
steve - July 14, 2010 | 12:24 pm · Link
COOL! I’m going to drink some Blue Nun and then go get in line for “Return of the Jedi.”
Seriously, though, I sincerely hope tattoos are on the way out. I realize this marks me as a pathetic old guy, but I just can’t get my head around the idea of people marking their bodies with weird, unrecognizable pictures and random words that can never be removed.
Jager - July 14, 2010 | 12:28 pm · Link
Check out “She’s Rockin a Beer Gut” by Trailer Choir
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxpcGT7kSoE
Maude - July 14, 2010 | 12:31 pm · Link
She is at a normal weight. Not looking like she’s an anorexic.
Captain Goto - July 14, 2010 | 12:34 pm · Link
@trollhattan: My kid is an aspiring dancer/actress, and I’m pretty sure that is the main reason she has avoided the ink up to this point, and only gotten a couple of extra holes in her ears. On other people, she thinks they are teh hawt.
Her school (a performing arts magnet) had a nurse in to tell them that piercings were the most gross, unhealthy, diseased things you could imagine…she came home with steam coming out of her ears. Off her interactions with the body-art set, she just blew it off as ignorant propaganda.
Whatever her reasons…I’m just glad she hasn’t done any ink yet (she’s 18).
JKC - July 14, 2010 | 12:41 pm · Link
My God, we can only hope so.
Pangloss - July 14, 2010 | 12:45 pm · Link
Is there some way to invest in tattoo removal? If anyone comes up with a painless way to remove neck tatts in the next 5 years, they’ll make a fortune.
jibeaux - July 14, 2010 | 12:50 pm · Link
@Tyler:
So, here’s a question I think I probably know the answer to, so it’s maybe more of a rant.
I’m about 5’4 and a half. Which is about an average American female height as you can get.
“petite” length pants are usually a half inch to an inch too short.
“regular” length pants are usually what feels like six or eight inches too long.
I can almost never buy pants without having to get them hemmed. I’m sure it’s better to make them long, which can be fixed, than too short, which can’t, but who has legs like this? My 5’11” sister in law often has to get her pants hemmed.
One notable exception are two pairs of “Bitten” brand pants that I have (it was a Sarah Jessica Parker line) which were about $8 or $10 or something, are well made, sturdy, a great design, fit great, and naturally, now completely defunct, went the way of the Steve and Barry’s stores which carried them. Sigh.
Ab_Normal - July 14, 2010 | 12:56 pm · Link
@Athenae:
I have to admit, I kinda skipped all that noise. I mainly wore jeans and polo shirts in high school; I was too busy playing Dungeons and Dragons and Champions to bother with girly shit. My mom almost had an aneurysm when I said I had a date for the senior prom; she literally grabbed her purse and keys and dragged me immediately to the mall to find a dress, shoes, etc. (I think she thought I was gay, when, in fact, I was just a nerd.) Night of, my older sister was conscripted to paint my face. I was told I clean up pretty good.
In college though… yeah, parachute pants. Gigantic shirts with big shoulder pads and huge belts. Those ankle-high flat suede boots. I’ve been informed by my 16-year-old daughter that I should have hung on to some of that stuff so she could steal it. Oops.
Cassidy - July 14, 2010 | 12:59 pm · Link
@Michael: amen
Corner Stone - July 14, 2010 | 1:00 pm · Link
Dear God,
It’s me again. I know we don’t talk that often, and usually only when I’m hiding behind a car tire and someone’s shooting at me, but I have a more normal request this time.
Please, if you ever had any compassion for the male variety of mankind, please please please do not remove low rise jeans from this earth.
I would rather start building another Ark ahead of the modern flood than have this forsaken mom jeans style return to this earth.
catclub - July 14, 2010 | 1:02 pm · Link
@jibeaux:
I am sure that Proust could write a novel about no longer being able to find the pants he wore and loved those long years ago. (A Remembrance of Pants Passed. In Search of Lost Levis.)
I heard somewhere that when Ralph Nader left the Army, he bought 20 pairs of regulation shoes and is still wearing them.
So,... I have learned that whenever you find some pants or shirt that you do like, go back and buy more.
It is a certainty that by the time they start wearing out, you will not be able to find anything like them.
Actually, if it takes some time to decide you like them, it will probably be too late already.
Corner Stone - July 14, 2010 | 1:05 pm · Link
It is impossible, and I mean statistically impossible, to meet a woman between 25 and 40 who does not have a tattoo.
cyntax - July 14, 2010 | 1:11 pm · Link
@Joel:
Yeah, American Apparel is a mixed bag at best. Their hiring policies and beauty standards seem rather exploitive:
[via Gawker]
Jager - July 14, 2010 | 1:13 pm · Link
@catclub:
Nader bought 20 pairs of “low quarters”...
timb - July 14, 2010 | 1:13 pm · Link
In many areas of rural Indiana, “mom jeans”, big hair, Bob Seger, Journey covers, jean shorts for men, etc have never gone out of style.
It’s like a time machine
Phoebe - July 14, 2010 | 1:14 pm · Link
@Comrade Mary:
But this model is skinny and these pants look foul.
I agree that skinniness is a prerequisite, but there’s more. You have to have long legs, or you look like a bowling pin, and the pants have to be wide-legged 1940’s style, or else you get this poofy abdomen pouch look you see in the picture above. That model probably does have long legs, since they all do. But stuff that pleats out has to stay out.
jibeaux - July 14, 2010 | 1:14 pm · Link
@catclub:
I know, I’m a moron! In searching the interwebs, I am reminded that almost everything Steve and Barry’s carried was $8.98. So I went to a store, tried on this pair of jeans and pair of white pants that YOU CAN’T SEE THROUGH that fit me great, nice classic plain-front, just below natural waist, straight leg numbers, the right length, and I bought….those two. For $8.98. Why I didn’t buy 10 pairs I’ll never know.
vtr - July 14, 2010 | 1:19 pm · Link
“Honey, do these pants make my butt look big?”
“No. Your butt makes your butt look big.”
licensed to kill time - July 14, 2010 | 1:22 pm · Link
Has anybody seen these Japanese jeans? OMG.
Nellcote - July 14, 2010 | 1:28 pm · Link
I look foreward to the demise of porn star as fashion icon. That said, the outfit in the ad looks like a uniform of some sort.
catclub - July 14, 2010 | 1:31 pm · Link
@vtr:
“Honey, do these pants make my butt look big?”
“No. Your butt makes your butt look big.”
A diplomat is a man who can convince his wife that a fur coat will make her look stout.
brendancalling - July 14, 2010 | 1:34 pm · Link
ugh.
as someone who grew up in the 1980s, I do NOT welcome the return of the high-waist mom pants. Just ugly as shit. Phoebe above nails it on the unsightly pouch.
the only high waist pants I actually approve of are the kind on men’s suits from the 1930s and 40s.
OTOH, if the 1980s are coming back, can we get a return of 80s hardcore bands too, like Bad Brains, Dead Kennedys, etc? Bands like that were about the only thing that made that decade livable.
Jager - July 14, 2010 | 1:44 pm · Link
@licensed to kill time:
Flying from LA to Vegas last winter a beautiful young woman sitting next to me had on low rise jeans with no undies and what was left of her obviously well trimmed pubic hair was peeking out just above the button. We had a nice chat and shared a cab to Bellagio. She wanted to “hook up” later. I had to have dinner with a client and passed and of course, the lovely Mrs J figured into the decision. For some reason, though she keeps popping into my head months later
Dr. Morpheus - July 14, 2010 | 1:46 pm · Link
@Angelos:
Yeah, what picture?
Seriously, I don’t see anything and I guess at least Angelos doesn’t either.
Dr. Morpheus - July 14, 2010 | 1:50 pm · Link
@Jay in Oregon:
Error 404: Not Found.
Dr. Morpheus - July 14, 2010 | 1:56 pm · Link
@licensed to kill time:
I’d love to, but I’m afraid that it will be the “people of Walmart” crowd wearing those.
flavortext - July 14, 2010 | 1:59 pm · Link
American Apparel is dying. I wouldn’t exactly call them trendsetters.
@Dr. Morpheus:
Replace the multiplication sign in the url with an actual “x”.
victory - July 14, 2010 | 2:00 pm · Link
What picture? i see nothing.
Comrade Mary - July 14, 2010 | 2:07 pm · Link
victory, try here.
If you’re on FireFox with AdBlock or AdBlockPlus, it won’t show on this page because it’s the size of a typical web ad. I told my copy to disable on this page and I could see it (but thanks to NoScript, I still don’t see most of the ads).
Cain - July 14, 2010 | 2:11 pm · Link
@moe99:
Yes, how fortuitous that we had a fashion that favors skinny women while in the midst of a obesity problem in western countries.
cain
Punchy - July 14, 2010 | 2:26 pm · Link
@Corner Stone: Dammit. Now I’m going to have to check out the wife in even closer detail….she claims to have none, and I havent seen any, but I havent really gone into…..uh….every single crevice….../cringe.
licensed to kill time - July 14, 2010 | 2:27 pm · Link
@Jager:
When you start moaning in your sleep and Mrs J asks what you were dreaming about, you can say Japanese jeans, honey, that’s all.
@Dr. Morpheus: Blerg.
b-psycho - July 14, 2010 | 2:27 pm · Link
@Dr. Morpheus: Basically. The desire to flaunt like that & the lack of a flaunt-worthy physique are sadly related.
Dork - July 14, 2010 | 2:31 pm · Link
@licensed to kill time: Those. are. the. GREATEST. thing. EVAAH.
Next time, tho, give this kinda link a MNSFW tag, so I know that I shouldn’t open it while talking to the boss….kthxboi
schrodinger's cat - July 14, 2010 | 2:35 pm · Link
@Corner Stone: I am in that age group and I don’t have a tatoo, but this is not RL is it?
Goblue72 - July 14, 2010 | 2:35 pm · Link
AA aren’t trend setters so much as trend followers. The 80’s have been back fashion wise since Bush’s second term, at least amongst the urban hipster douche set in most large cities. The trend initially borrowed from the looks of 80’s New Wave (skinny pants, neon plastic sunglasses, white belts, angular haircuts) with the occassional foray into Pat Benatar and early Madonna. Over the last year I’ve been seeing more like the above – high waisted pleated pants, feathered hair, loose blouses on women and a Miami Vice-ish look on men.
I live in SF btw, ground central for the hipster douche set.
licensed to kill time - July 14, 2010 | 2:37 pm · Link
@Dork: Sorry, did not even cross my mind. Funny how jeans that some think are suitable for wearing in public MNBSFW, huh?
schrodinger's cat - July 14, 2010 | 2:39 pm · Link
@jibeaux: I have the same problem, I am 5ft 3. The short length in regular sized Levis jeans works for me.
schrodinger's cat - July 14, 2010 | 2:40 pm · Link
@licensed to kill time: eewww, please pass me the brain bleach now.
Omnes Omnibus - July 14, 2010 | 2:46 pm · Link
@schrodinger’s cat: Things that have been seen cannot be unseen. Think about that before you click on a link in the future.
Nicole - July 14, 2010 | 3:02 pm · Link
In defense of hip-huggers- the muffin-top is not a result of hip-huggers themselves; it’s a result of women wearing a size too small. If there’s one thing I wish could be drummed into the heads of females everywhere, it’s that wearing too-small clothes just makes one look bigger. I really think if our clothes were sized more like men’s- collar size, waist size, inseam, sleeve- we’d dress ourselves better than with the ridiculous 0-14, which varies from designer to designer.
As a small woman (5’4”), I love hip huggers and hate high-waisted pants. And I went through the 80s, and wish I could shake some of the teens and 20-somethings and say, “Don’t you understand? We didn’t know what we were doing! Learn from our mistakes! Put down the blue mascara!”
A friend once said he thinks the 1980’s were given to us as a lesson for why men should never be allowed to venture from the basics for wardrobe.
Jay in Oregon - July 14, 2010 | 3:06 pm · Link
@Dr. Morpheus:
When I copy and paste the URL, it looks like the x in “300×250” is being replaced by some funky HTML entity.
Try this: http://bit.ly/a0ydf7
EDIT: Ah, WordPress is replacing the “x” with a multiplication sign. FYGDWP…
valdivia - July 14, 2010 | 3:12 pm · Link
Late to the thread but I will say: the only thing I will take with me from the 80s is the embarrassing music which I still, to my eternal shame, enjoy way too much. But these clothes? Anything like it. No effing way. the way too tight, skinny jeans, you will have to bury them in them.
that is all.
Chat Noir - July 14, 2010 | 3:17 pm · Link
@valdivia:
I’m right there with you. I often crank up 80s on 8 on SiriusXM (although I prefer 1980-1985 to the latter part of the 80s)—brings back “I want my MTV” memories. Still love “Goody Two Shoes” by Adam Ant!
valdivia - July 14, 2010 | 3:45 pm · Link
@Chat Noir:
so totally. glad to know I am not the only one.
also. too. I meant to say: I will be buried in a those skinny hip hugging jeans. even if they are out of fashion right away
Deborah - July 14, 2010 | 4:05 pm · Link
Yes, tramp stamps and implants are on their way out. I have no personal knowledge, but will make the assertion to move things along.
Of course I’m trucking along in my waistband-at-waist pants, waiting for the fashion world to come back around and meet me again, so this may fail.
Deborah - July 14, 2010 | 4:13 pm · Link
From the Japanese jeans:
See? This is what I think of when I see people in lowrisers; they always seem to be pulling at their pants. Also too, the muffin top which breaks out on anyone who doesn’t have abs of steel and actually moves around—I grant if you hold still and suck your gut in they look okay.
Joel - July 14, 2010 | 4:32 pm · Link
The nadir for men’s fashion occurred when jeans were being sold with measurements for circumference… at the cuffs.
That was sometime in the mid 90s and limited mostly to hip-hop loving white kids.
asiangrrlMN - July 14, 2010 | 4:49 pm · Link
I can see the pic on Chrome.
I never wore this crap, but I also never wore low-risers, either. I wear mostly Taiwanese clothes because American clothing just does not fit me correctly. I gave up wearing jeans years ago, and I haven’t regretted it for a single moment.
@Tyler: If you (the industry) don’t hate women, why do you act as if you do? I haven’t found any decent clothing in America for ages. I am thick and curvy and even when I was at my skinniest, I still had boobs and hips. I have no ass, though. NOTHING fit. Or, the shit that did fit looked like it was made for my granny. The industry is thin-woman centered—or rather, the clothing in general is shit that looks good on a twelve-year old boy.
@Athenae: Ten times ditto the tats part. I love ‘em. I think they are hawt and sexy (if done right), and I am thinking of getting my next (and probably final) one pretty soon. I’m talking the artsy ones and not the generic shit.
I don’t wear makeup. I don’t wear jeans. I have pretty much given up on the whole American clothing scene, in part because none of it ever appealed to me. I’m thirty-nine, so I’m too old for the teen/twenties look, but I am not old enough (nor is it my style) for the twin-set look. I don’t wear panties, so that’s not a problem. I really am a minimalist when it comes to clothing. I hate the feel of it and would rather we all just be naked.
Corner Stone - July 14, 2010 | 4:55 pm · Link
@schrodinger’s cat: I did say “statistically” which comes with an error rate of +/- 3%.
But WTS ~ Hai!!
tworivers - July 14, 2010 | 5:09 pm · Link
I hate pleated pants.
Just thought I’d share that with you all.
tworivers - July 14, 2010 | 5:14 pm · Link
Does anybody as geezerly as me remember Sweats Bi Ebe back in the 80’s? They were these sweat pants that could pass as chinos, and had a sporty stripe along the outside seam. I never had a pair, but they were HUGE in my junior high school circa 1983.
HumboldtBlue - July 14, 2010 | 5:50 pm · Link
Ummm …. uhhhh …. did anyone else wear “designer” jeans in the ‘80s? I’m not sayin’ I did, (It’s Jordache, For Men) I was just wondering and stuff.
Low-rise jeans are the worst thing that has ever happened to those of us who love to people watch and love the sight of a nice round, full ass. The ass is squeezed into contortions only a Chinese acrobat could love and end up looking like the woman who is wearing them shoved bricks down her pants before she left the house. They can die, die, die.
My biggest peeve is with two women who clerk at the neighborhood bodega. They seem to think that displaying nearly all of the massive flesh contained in their chestal regions is a good thing and that wearing shirts and tops that display said glandular meat (both ladies are well-endowed) is the hottest thing since Jordache. I mean, seriously, I just came in for a six-pack of PBR, some pretzels and an ice cream sandwich, why must I be subjected to the jiggling, wiggling bouncing boobs barely contained under your shirt?
Noooooooo …. don’t lean over!
b-psycho - July 14, 2010 | 5:55 pm · Link
@HumboldtBlue: Eh, long as their stomachs aren’t equally as jiggly I’d say you’re lucky. Accept the boobs, embrace the boobs, do not be afraid…
Anne Laurie - July 14, 2010 | 6:03 pm · Link
@Comrade Mary: Try ‘French cut’ or ‘high cut’ briefs. They are the opposite of bikinis, sitting at the ‘normal’ waistline but with the leg holes cut so they don’t grip the inner thigh. I like the Jockey brand, which also have comfy non-elastic leg openings, and fit well in sizes from tiny to queen (3-11).
Comrade Mary - July 14, 2010 | 6:45 pm · Link
Thanks, Anne Laurie! It’s bike riding that is making me look for alternatives. I like to stay in street clothes for commuting and shopping, keeping the necessary but clunky adult diapers look of real cycling shorts for longer rides.
If the briefs you’re talking about are like the ones I see here, they still seem to nestle right into the groin, rather than having a flat seam or gusset, with a longer leg ending in soft elastic, like these. I’m wondering if the leg opening, even though it’s comfy when just walking around, might bunch and irritate on the bike.
Dr. Morpheus - July 14, 2010 | 10:39 pm · Link
@Comrade Mary: I had Adblocker Plus disabled and NoScript as well and I still couldn’t see it until your link, thanks!
So that’s it?
What’s so awful about it?
Honestly, it looks fine. But then again, I never have followed fashion trends…
Dr. Morpheus - July 14, 2010 | 10:44 pm · Link
@HumboldtBlue:
Huh, o.k., then I guess we both wish we could trade places… I wouldn’t mind the show so much myself…
Steeplejack - July 15, 2010 | 12:45 am · Link
@Michael:
And by “women” I presume you don’t mean anyone over 30.
Steeplejack - July 15, 2010 | 12:53 am · Link
@catclub:
This is true. I especially notice this problem with running shoes. I find a pair I like, I run them into the ground, and then when I go back to get another pair of the exact same model ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! you are old and out of it. Those shoes are so six months ago. Ugh.
I would love to know what the life expectancy of the average NIke or New Balance shoe model is.
Steeplejack - July 15, 2010 | 12:57 am · Link
@Phoebe:
This sounds like it should be a “maxim” or a rule of life or something. But about what I have no idea.