Folks like us
Do we really live in a world where bloggers can allege having had affairs with politicians and suddenly become national celebrities? Is this something we at Balloon-Juice should consider as a traffic maximization strategy? And who would be a good politician to claim I’ve had an affair with?
May 28, 2010 12:51 pm
Posted in: General Stupidity
194 Comments
194 Responses
Scott - May 28, 2010 | 12:53 pm · Link
Well, obviously, Sarah Palin. She’s America’s Sweetheart!
Scuffletuffle - May 28, 2010 | 12:54 pm · Link
I’m not averse to affairs personally, but I’m unable to think of a single elected official who I would be willing to admit to an affair with. My standards are low, certainly, but not that low.
Dammit, wanted to be first…
Dammit…whom…dammit
Ash Can - May 28, 2010 | 12:54 pm · Link
Mitch McConnell.
handy - May 28, 2010 | 12:56 pm · Link
Wait. Who? What?
Kennedy - May 28, 2010 | 12:56 pm · Link
Michelle Bachmann
Killjoy - May 28, 2010 | 12:56 pm · Link
Damn, beat to the punch by Kennedy
Mike in NC - May 28, 2010 | 12:56 pm · Link
‘Mean Jean’ Schmidt?
Tonybrown74 - May 28, 2010 | 12:57 pm · Link
Yeah … that story has been bothering me. Not that I want to come to the defense of Family Values hypocrite, but o far, I really haven’t seen any real evidence of an affair.
Hours of phone calls and texts sound salacious until you find out that the blogger worked for Hailey during that time (so you would expect significant contact. Now you are hearing that there are photos to follow. I almost don’t believe it.
blahblahblah - May 28, 2010 | 12:57 pm · Link
I vote for Mitch McConnell.
Captain Goto - May 28, 2010 | 12:58 pm · Link
@Mike in NC: Oh, ICK.
licensed to kill time - May 28, 2010 | 12:58 pm · Link
DougJ and Scott ‘Cosmo’ Brown. Guaranteed headlines, traffic stampede like a rabid elephant.
Alex K - May 28, 2010 | 12:59 pm · Link
The Chicken Lady!
Lolis - May 28, 2010 | 12:59 pm · Link
You should actually have the affair first.
Anonymous At Work - May 28, 2010 | 12:59 pm · Link
Didn’t you mention showering with Rahm Emanuel?
fourlegsgood - May 28, 2010 | 12:59 pm · Link
Sarah Palin, obviously!!
Or how about Sue Lowden? you can spin tales about how she loved for you to wear a plushy chicken suit in the boudoir. Your clucking drove her to ecstasy
Clearly this would be traffic gold. The underpants gnomes would gnash their teefies in rage and envy.
Butch - May 28, 2010 | 1:00 pm · Link
Newt Gingrich. I dare you to top the “uck” in that one.
fourlegsgood - May 28, 2010 | 1:00 pm · Link
Feh. Alex beat me to it. But he didn’t give the salacious details, so I should get points for that.
fourlegsgood - May 28, 2010 | 1:00 pm · Link
@Butch: I’ll take that bet.
Karl Rove.
fourlegsgood - May 28, 2010 | 1:02 pm · Link
Eric Cantor would be pretty cringe inducing as well. And funny.
Bruce (formerly Steve S.) - May 28, 2010 | 1:02 pm · Link
Palin, of course. To give your story cred you might want to mention the Alaska-shaped mole on her left buttock.
Evan - May 28, 2010 | 1:04 pm · Link
Ronald Reagan. Post June 5, 2004.
Ranger 3 - May 28, 2010 | 1:04 pm · Link
Mark Foley, FTW.
Loneoak - May 28, 2010 | 1:05 pm · Link
Antonin Scalia.
Paris - May 28, 2010 | 1:05 pm · Link
What about commenters? When do we get laid?
Uloborus - May 28, 2010 | 1:05 pm · Link
Rachel Maddow. I hear she’s running for office.
C Nelson Reilly - May 28, 2010 | 1:05 pm · Link
Don’t discriminate, do it with Rand Paul.
Xenos - May 28, 2010 | 1:06 pm · Link
@Bruce (formerly Steve S.):
Or you could declare that you know her ‘distinguishing characteristic’, such as the fact the she is, you know, female.
Belafon (formerly anonevent) - May 28, 2010 | 1:06 pm · Link
Elana Kagen. It would probably help her with some of the media types.
bmcchgo - May 28, 2010 | 1:06 pm · Link
You could be Elana Kagen’s beard? Dangit, Belafon beat me to it!
fourlegsgood - May 28, 2010 | 1:06 pm · Link
@Ranger 3: No, it needs to be a current candidate or a serving politician.
frankdawg - May 28, 2010 | 1:06 pm · Link
Carly Fiorina while you wear a sheep suit
Zam - May 28, 2010 | 1:07 pm · Link
Robert Byrd
GregB - May 28, 2010 | 1:07 pm · Link
John Dingell
fucen tarmal - May 28, 2010 | 1:08 pm · Link
sarah palin’s husband would be better.
or john boehner, you just have to bath in a hot tub full of cheetoes before your tearful presser. that sort of visual makes things credible.
michelle bachmann would be a fun choice, you can make up any kind of kinky sex stuff and it would be believable, the only thing that wouldn’t is that she likes it anvil-missionary.
frankdawg - May 28, 2010 | 1:08 pm · Link
How about a manage-o-3 with the Maine team, Olympia Snowe and Susan Collins?
Mike Kay - May 28, 2010 | 1:08 pm · Link
I banged Hillary!
celticdragonchick - May 28, 2010 | 1:08 pm · Link
Sam Brownback or Rick Perry.
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 1:08 pm · Link
NANCY SMASH!
liberty60 - May 28, 2010 | 1:08 pm · Link
Didn’t one of you confront Eric Massa in the shower?
celticdragonchick - May 28, 2010 | 1:09 pm · Link
@fucen tarmal:
LMAO!
frankdawg - May 28, 2010 | 1:09 pm · Link
@Zam:
Bob Byrd, St Ronnie post 2004 – same diff
calling all toasters - May 28, 2010 | 1:09 pm · Link
Gillibrand. Because you deserve the best.
QuaintIrene - May 28, 2010 | 1:09 pm · Link
And since we should have one from the Libertarian side, Jesse Ventura.
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 1:09 pm · Link
@Corner Stone: No, seriously. I have quite the thing for her.
Steve - May 28, 2010 | 1:09 pm · Link
I had what I thought was a good suggestion, but Larry Sinclair got there first.
frankdawg - May 28, 2010 | 1:09 pm · Link
@celticdragonchick:
Bareback with Brownback?
Joseph Nobles - May 28, 2010 | 1:10 pm · Link
It can’t be too big a name, because people will think it’s too good to be true. But it has to be plausible.
So my vote is Patrick McHenry from North Carolina’s 10th District. He just screams “What happens at Webelos camp stays at Webelos camp” to me.
Punchy - May 28, 2010 | 1:10 pm · Link
Pam Geller. At least you’d get some boobies out of it.
fucen tarmal - May 28, 2010 | 1:10 pm · Link
scott brown’s wife with the curious hand, or mrs. brown’s lovely daughters, to put a musical twist on things.
wrb - May 28, 2010 | 1:11 pm · Link
Boehner with a bag over his head
Morzer - May 28, 2010 | 1:11 pm · Link
Lindsay Graham. Claim you and Charlie Crist had a threesome and the teabaggers will explode in an orgy of gratified suspicion.
Michael - May 28, 2010 | 1:11 pm · Link
@Kennedy:
Yup. Everybody knows that sex with crazy women is teh awesome. Its just the aftereffects and stalking afterward that sucks. You’d generate some degree of envy for the maximization of getting the freak on, with the pity that comes from the knowledge that you can never have a beloved pet live with you, ever.
Mike Kay - May 28, 2010 | 1:11 pm · Link
I loofahed the Bush twins in the oval office, if ya know what i mean.
zmulls - May 28, 2010 | 1:11 pm · Link
Joe Sestak. Obviously. That will create an irresistable Mobius strip of a story.
Michael D. - May 28, 2010 | 1:11 pm · Link
I would like to see DougJ do the nasty with Kay Bailey Hutchison.
No. Wait. I would like to select Kay Bailey Hutchison as Doug’s “affair” but I would NEVER want to hear or see anything about it.
Alex K - May 28, 2010 | 1:13 pm · Link
Ted Kaufman, if you’re into the whole necrophilia thing.
artem1s - May 28, 2010 | 1:13 pm · Link
@Butch:
Cheney. but that’s necrophilia, innit it?
celticdragonchick - May 28, 2010 | 1:13 pm · Link
@liberty60:
Raum touched me in the shower. I felt a tingle go up my leg!
Froley - May 28, 2010 | 1:13 pm · Link
Traficant. It’s always been Traficant.
celticdragonchick - May 28, 2010 | 1:15 pm · Link
@Punchy:
Yeah, but I suspect she dines on her mates afterwards.
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 1:15 pm · Link
@zmulls:
Quick! Have a reporter ask Sestak if he was offered sex with DougJ in return for him not snuff filming him and Specter.
fucen tarmal - May 28, 2010 | 1:16 pm · Link
you could also flatter boehner by saying it was exactly like jerking off a can of beefaroni.
Mike Kay - May 28, 2010 | 1:16 pm · Link
Liz cheney begged me to tie her up and to “waterboard” her (wink, wink).
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 1:16 pm · Link
@Froley: Is it just me or does Coburn look a hell of a lot like Traficant?
Josie - May 28, 2010 | 1:17 pm · Link
Rick Perry
celticdragonchick - May 28, 2010 | 1:18 pm · Link
@fucen tarmal:
I did not need that mental image.
gag
celticdragonchick - May 28, 2010 | 1:18 pm · Link
@Mike Kay:
Heh!
liberty60 - May 28, 2010 | 1:19 pm · Link
Wait, I change my vote to Rep. Virginia Foxx…produce a string of emails in which you refer to her as “Representative Foxxxy”, or how she was a Foxx in the Rooster house” or something.
Ok, now I need a shower.
Leonard Stiltskin - May 28, 2010 | 1:21 pm · Link
@Tonybrown74:
Folks was a consultant to Haley for two years and was paid less than $5000, yet phone records show 34 hours of phone calls, many of them after midnight, including one for hours until 5 am.
Several witnesses are on record as seeing Haley’s Cadillac parked for months at Folks’ townhouse during the time in question.
What exactly are you bothered by? The stupidity of thinking that Haley paid $5000 for 100s of hours of “political consulting”?
Kevin Phillips Bong - May 28, 2010 | 1:21 pm · Link
I hear Virginia Fox gives good dome. I’d hit it.
fucen tarmal - May 28, 2010 | 1:22 pm · Link
in order to make real money, you have to film the exploits, and in today’s porn market, title is everything….
colon pow! with colin powell! or how i learned to stop worrying and retired the general.
Mike Kay - May 28, 2010 | 1:22 pm · Link
O.T.
Palin erects 20 foot Berlin Wall
http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-50.....03544.html
Fucking crazy.
Quaker in a Basement - May 28, 2010 | 1:23 pm · Link
Well, Elena Kagan, of course.
Butch - May 28, 2010 | 1:24 pm · Link
@artem1s: @fourlegsgood: I gotta concede to you both. I guess I owe you a beer.
frankdawg - May 28, 2010 | 1:25 pm · Link
@fucen tarmal:
colon pow! with colin powell! or how i learned to stop worrying and retired the general.
We have a new leader there!
On the other hand, that title makes it sound like you have spent waaaaaayyy too much time thinking about it!
Alex S. - May 28, 2010 | 1:25 pm · Link
Hmm, the good ones are already mentioned….
...Jim Inhofe?
Comrade Dread - May 28, 2010 | 1:26 pm · Link
Liz Cheney, but I’m not sure people would believe you since it’s well known that the Cheneys eat their mates after the act is completed.
Steve - May 28, 2010 | 1:27 pm · Link
@Leonard Stiltskin:
I think “on record” means something different to me than it does to you.
Urza - May 28, 2010 | 1:27 pm · Link
I’m late to the thread, but I vote you say you had an orgy with Obama. Anything to get this stupid Sestak stuff off the air. How many millions could they waste on that investigation when its standard business in Washington.
oliver's Neck - May 28, 2010 | 1:28 pm · Link
Strom Thurmond!!
Mako - May 28, 2010 | 1:28 pm · Link
Threesome back in the day. Me, Henry Kissinger and a quaalude-rattled barely-legal Tricia Nixon.
Todd - May 28, 2010 | 1:29 pm · Link
Jane Hamsher
Trinity - May 28, 2010 | 1:30 pm · Link
This thread is so full of win. You Juicers have made my boring afternoon teh lulz!
Zifnab - May 28, 2010 | 1:31 pm · Link
@Mako: Tricia was pretty hot in her day. I’d do her.
But I was thinking something more along the line of a C-Street Orgy with David Vitter as power bottom.
canuckistani - May 28, 2010 | 1:31 pm · Link
Bristol Palin. We know the abstinence is all talk.
Morzer - May 28, 2010 | 1:33 pm · Link
@Todd: @Todd:
Only if you make clear that Grover Norquist supplied the crack and participated in a five day binge of drug-fuelled heathen perversity in a king-size bathtub filled with champagne and the corpse of the Bush administration.
PeakVT - May 28, 2010 | 1:33 pm · Link
And who would be a good politician to claim I’ve had an affair with?
Good for what: the country, or you? For the former, I’d say Inhofe.
ruemara - May 28, 2010 | 1:34 pm · Link
This is the most gorge inducing thread on Balloon Juice ever.
Emma - May 28, 2010 | 1:36 pm · Link
Y’all want to make me lose my delicious cream of broccoli soup, right? Straight into the monitor, right?
Ick, Ick, Ick.
licensed to kill time - May 28, 2010 | 1:36 pm · Link
Has anybody mentioned DougJ and Hillary? In the Oval Office if possible, and if Doug could wear a blue dress it would be teh awesome. Leave the cigar, take the dress.
Rafterman - May 28, 2010 | 1:37 pm · Link
Add my vote for Bachmann.
slag - May 28, 2010 | 1:38 pm · Link
Being a liberal, I don’t really care who you sleep with. Just please be sure to use protection. We don’t need any more accidents.
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 1:39 pm · Link
@licensed to kill time: Nice.
Morzer - May 28, 2010 | 1:39 pm · Link
@Emma:
Please. I don’t mind discussing Grover Norquist, DougJ, Jane Hamsher and Andrew Sullivan’s beagles locked in erotic congress, but there must be some limits.
Mike Kay - May 28, 2010 | 1:40 pm · Link
@Todd: nah, I did her, she’s a cold fish in bed.
Bill Murray - May 28, 2010 | 1:41 pm · Link
Ilona Staller —that is a capital eye followed by an “el”.
“In 1991, Staller was among the founders of the political movement Partito dell’Amore (Love Party), spearheaded by her friend and fellow porn star Moana Pozzi. She has advocated absolute sexual freedom – “Love for All!”
She renewed her offer to have sex with Saddam Hussein in October 2002, when Iraq was resisting international pressure to allow inspections for weapons of mass destruction, and in April 2006 made the same offer to Osama bin Laden. To this day, none of the above have accepted her offer.”
ruemara - May 28, 2010 | 1:44 pm · Link
@Bill Murray:
Fixed
LGRooney - May 28, 2010 | 1:44 pm · Link
@Morzer: And Grover had to lick off some of the crack to show you how much you would lose if Uncle Sam got into the legalization biz. It was a discussion into the abusiveness of our drug wars, really! I paid him for his… er, he paid me for… er, no money exchanged hands. Wouldn’t want Uncle Sam swooping in to lick off some of that.
Zifnab - May 28, 2010 | 1:45 pm · Link
@PeakVT: You think he’d stop getting ridden around by the oil industry so much if someone just said his safe word?
eric - May 28, 2010 | 1:46 pm · Link
teh good: Mrs. Kucinich
teh bad: Ms. bachmann
teh ugly: Liz Cheney, so i can make off-color political commentary about how she made more sense while [fill in the blank]
eric
anticontrarian - May 28, 2010 | 1:46 pm · Link
Tom Tancredo.
Shawn in ShowMe - May 28, 2010 | 1:47 pm · Link
Michael Steele pushed up on my woman but then he walked it back.
Zifnab - May 28, 2010 | 1:47 pm · Link
@Emma: Wait, cream of brocolli? Are you throwing up or just really enjoying yourself?
Bill E Pilgrim - May 28, 2010 | 1:47 pm · Link
Larry Craig.
Best choice to torpedo any denial, since as far as he knows it might be true. Not having seen any faces, that is.
Come to think of it, though, we don’t see yours either. The Internet is a lot like an airport bathroom when you think about it, except the tapping is on keyboards.
Sheila - May 28, 2010 | 1:47 pm · Link
Robert Byrd. Then you could claim it without actually having to do it.
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 1:47 pm · Link
@Bill Murray: I just love it that the word “spearheaded” appears in this comment.
eric - May 28, 2010 | 1:48 pm · Link
@anticontrarian: you know he wont let you cum north of the border
LGRooney - May 28, 2010 | 1:48 pm · Link
@Bill Murray: But, per the CIA, Saddam and Osama are teh gey and it was their conjugal bid to force gay marriage rights into the Shariah that meant we had to invade! Poor Ilona would have been so bored as they would have had no time for her.
Martin - May 28, 2010 | 1:49 pm · Link
I can’t believe nobody has said John McCain.
Dinah - May 28, 2010 | 1:51 pm · Link
Ann Coulter, please Ann Coulter! She’s not a politician, but I guarantee an affair with her is a traffic maximization strategy. Especially if you give us the details.
Comrade Sock Puppet of the Great Satan - May 28, 2010 | 1:51 pm · Link
Another for Bachmann. Something about those houndstooth jackets does it for me.
But I’d have a lawyer standing by to serve the restraining order afterwards. ‘Cos the crazy is too much.
Nobody mentioned Vitter yet? Even if you made him buy his own Depends?
LGRooney - May 28, 2010 | 1:52 pm · Link
Do us some good down here in Virginia and make it Cuccinelli. Coochie- coochie-coo, indeed!
Sentient Puddle - May 28, 2010 | 1:52 pm · Link
@Martin: I think because everybody’s trying to come up with a “good news” joke for it.
LGRooney - May 28, 2010 | 1:53 pm · Link
@Dinah: Problem is that Lady Gaga has already shown us that woman with penis doesn’t sell that well.
Bobby Thomson - May 28, 2010 | 1:55 pm · Link
Just make sure it’s a woman. Men can’t help bragging afterwards. That was Nikki Haley’s (alleged) mistake.
Persia - May 28, 2010 | 1:55 pm · Link
Aim high: Michelle Obama. Talk about how she called you ‘whitey’ in bed.
brendancalling - May 28, 2010 | 1:56 pm · Link
Arlen Specter and I have been making sweet sweet love since i was 17.
Tom Hilton - May 28, 2010 | 1:56 pm · Link
Holy Joe Lieberman, of course.
LikeableInMyOwnWay - May 28, 2010 | 1:56 pm · Link
Yes. We want to see you slipping into a hotel with Michelle Bachmann. I promise you more page views if you do this.
Also, too, I will take back every shitty thing I have said to you in the last five years. I swear.
TR - May 28, 2010 | 1:58 pm · Link
Pat Toomey
Wile E. Quixote - May 28, 2010 | 1:59 pm · Link
@frankdawg:
Ick! Santorum everywhere. Burn the sheets when you’re done.
4tehlulz - May 28, 2010 | 1:59 pm · Link
Threeway with Vladamir Putin and Sarah Palin.
At least Vlad is hot.
Shawn in ShowMe - May 28, 2010 | 1:59 pm · Link
@brendancalling
Did he show you his magic bullet?
Michael - May 28, 2010 | 1:59 pm · Link
The elephant in the room that everybody is afraid to mention:
Married right wing chicks out on the prowl for men really do know how to get their freak on – its like they’re frenzied or something. If I was still into that sort of thing, I could run in those circles and get laid constantly by really depraved yet physically, um, talented and appreciative (even if batshit crazy) women just by going to wingnut events. I’m serious.
If you really want to get laid, go to a wingnut conference or event and pick off 35-45 year olds who have traveled without their husbands. I’ve suspected that their husbands, being wingnuts themselves, tend to be completely selfish assholes in all facets of life.
brendancalling - May 28, 2010 | 2:00 pm · Link
rough anal with Mary Landrieu in bondage gear (while she straps it on for Ben Nelson)
Morbo - May 28, 2010 | 2:01 pm · Link
Margaret Thatcher. Let’s not be jingoistic here.
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 2:01 pm · Link
@brendancalling: God damn.
libarbarian - May 28, 2010 | 2:02 pm · Link
@Dina
I agree.
Personally, I’ll bet that she likes to be spit on and called a “dirty liberal whore” before getting facialed.
williamc - May 28, 2010 | 2:02 pm · Link
It would have to be a Dem so that people think, “why would he kneecap one of his own like that if it weren’t true?”
I’m going to stake my claim to Jack Conway, Dem Senate nominee in Kentucky; he’s attractive, well-spoken, and hates Rand Paul like you do (means you have stuff in common), plus the media would run with it because it puts crazy-ass back in the game (Rand might be insane, but he’s not queer!), and you know how they love a good horserace/dogfight…
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 2:03 pm · Link
@Morbo: Are you saying that Imelda Marcos is now in the arena?
LikeableInMyOwnWay - May 28, 2010 | 2:03 pm · Link
What a chickenshit. Pick ‘em off right in front of their husbands, if you have a hair on your ass.
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 2:04 pm · Link
@libarbarian: Good God.
Where the fuck am I?
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 2:05 pm · Link
@Michael:
Sooo…what’s the date on your death certificate then?
LikeableInMyOwnWay - May 28, 2010 | 2:05 pm · Link
@Corner Stone:
At the bottom, compadre. At the bottom.
Martin - May 28, 2010 | 2:06 pm · Link
@Sentient Puddle: I think Dougj should recount the escapades across McCain’s numerous homes, which walnuts always found exciting as he often felt he was seeing many of them for the first time.
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 2:07 pm · Link
@Persia:
Oh, I can guarantee you there would absolutely be a “I hate whitey” tape after that episode.
brendancalling - May 28, 2010 | 2:08 pm · Link
@libarbarian:
time for the classic on sex with Coulter.
Adding bukkake party with Diane Feinstein, David Vitter dressed in a giant diaper, Mark Foley coated in rancid Crisco and an electric eel.
Mark S. - May 28, 2010 | 2:09 pm · Link
How desperate do you have to be to have an affair with this guy? Were there no ex-cons available?
Sarah Palin (who has endorsed Haley) weighs in:
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 2:09 pm · Link
@LikeableInMyOwnWay:
Win the Bottom?
/hat tip srv in another thread
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 2:11 pm · Link
Honestly, as was mentioned earlier, you need a really good title to sell.
That’s why, IMO, the only answer here is:
The Ladies of Maine
Punchy - May 28, 2010 | 2:12 pm · Link
Ann Curry from NBC news?
Mark S. - May 28, 2010 | 2:13 pm · Link
@Mark S.:
Here’s a link to Sarah.
jibeaux - May 28, 2010 | 2:13 pm · Link
@Corner Stone:
That’s so winny, it ought to be in the House at Pooh Corner.
Alain - May 28, 2010 | 2:13 pm · Link
134 posts and no one stumbles onto the obvious choice:
Massa
I mean you already have a “history” with him, and lord knows, he likes snorkeling and ticklefights, so he’s easy prey…..
ruemara - May 28, 2010 | 2:13 pm · Link
May I interrupt this repulsive line of thread with some techno geek news re: BP Volcano?
http://www.hydro-international....._Test.html
jibeaux - May 28, 2010 | 2:15 pm · Link
I’m going to vote for Scott Brown, in the bed of a pickup truck, with a candlestick.
wmd - May 28, 2010 | 2:15 pm · Link
Janet Reno.
Emma - May 28, 2010 | 2:16 pm · Link
Zifnab: You know, I knew, the moment the “edit” button went away, someone would mention that….. The minds around here…. LOL
Michael - May 28, 2010 | 2:16 pm · Link
@Corner Stone:
Oh, I wouldn’t turn down an escapade. I meant if I was still into wingnut political events.
Wile E. Quixote - May 28, 2010 | 2:18 pm · Link
@jibeaux:
Is the candlestick being used for illumination? Or for other purposes?
J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford - May 28, 2010 | 2:19 pm · Link
How about Lindsey Graham?
JohnR - May 28, 2010 | 2:19 pm · Link
116 to get Holy Joe? How disappointing – he was my first thought; the mental image of Droopy being brutalized (and loving it) made my day in a sort of perverse and horible way.
libarbarian - May 28, 2010 | 2:23 pm · Link
@brendancalling
I hadn’t seen that before. Lol.
daverave - May 28, 2010 | 2:25 pm · Link
sandwiched between Bachmann and Pelosi, trying to get to each other, if you know what I mean.
sukabi - May 28, 2010 | 2:27 pm · Link
Maximum Impact—a four-banger with Inhofe, Coburn and Lieberman… just because they complain about a lack of bipartisanship.
J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford - May 28, 2010 | 2:28 pm · Link
@Morzer:
Damn, I should have searched for “Lindsay” before I posted. That’ll teach me to spell correctly.
robertdsc - May 28, 2010 | 2:28 pm · Link
Teh Gillibrand iz no fair! Leeaaavvvvvvve herrrr alooooooone! /cry
I vote for Blanche Lincoln with a side of Laura Bush, non-drugged edition.
J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford - May 28, 2010 | 2:29 pm · Link
Denny Hastert
Tonal Crow - May 28, 2010 | 2:31 pm · Link
I vote for “carrying luggage” for George Rekers, while abusing him by reciting poems of your pining love for Jane Hamsher.
scav - May 28, 2010 | 2:31 pm · Link
Benedictus XVI, Episcopus Romae a.k.a. Joseph Alois Ratzinger. This is BJ: we can multi-task.
Patriot 3 - May 28, 2010 | 2:33 pm · Link
Haley and Nikki
http://img.photobucket.com/alb...../haley.jpg
Tonal Crow - May 28, 2010 | 2:35 pm · Link
@scav: You’ve gotta love the name “Ratzinger”.
sukabi - May 28, 2010 | 2:36 pm · Link
@robertdsc: now you’re just talkin’ crazy… there is no “non-drugged” version of Laura Bush.
Califlander - May 28, 2010 | 2:38 pm · Link
Rick Santorum.
What? Too obvious?
scav - May 28, 2010 | 2:39 pm · Link
@Patriot 3: oh noez, incidents overload and scandal miscegenation! I’m now watching the world being taken out by the Haley-BoP and the plunging Nikki marketz!
@Tonal Crow: indeed. :)
Tonal Crow - May 28, 2010 | 2:39 pm · Link
@Califlander: That requires at least one dog.
QuaintIrene - May 28, 2010 | 2:39 pm · Link
In other romantic news…
Radio talk show host Rush Limbaugh is set to marry his longtime girlfriend, Kathryn Rogers, next week in an intimate ceremony at his beachfront home in Palm Beach, Fla.
Has she thought about interviewing any of the three previoius Mrs. Limbaughs?
Patriot 3 - May 28, 2010 | 2:42 pm · Link
@QuaintIrene: That’s wei@QuaintIrene: rd. I did not know that he liked women.
DMG - May 28, 2010 | 2:43 pm · Link
Did anyone say Massa yet?
jibeaux - May 28, 2010 | 2:44 pm · Link
@Wile E. Quixote:
I’ve got enough faith in DougJ not to script the whole thing for him. I’m sure he’ll find good use(s). Afterwards, maybe he can reward himself with Miss Scarlet, in the parlor, with the rope. Although I understand the original model for Miss Scarlet in the board game is James Lipton’s wife, so might want to be careful there.
jibeaux - May 28, 2010 | 2:45 pm · Link
@QuaintIrene:
Not to mention the other concurrent girlfriends and underaged prostitutes….
jibeaux - May 28, 2010 | 2:46 pm · Link
@Tonal Crow:
It also could result in santorum. For those unaware of the internet tradition this is referring to, I recommend not googling Dan Savage’s definition if you have already had lunch.
YellowJournalism - May 28, 2010 | 2:47 pm · Link
Kim Jong-Il
I bet he’d call you “Mr. Clinton” in the throes of passion.
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 2:49 pm · Link
@sukabi:
And if there were, why would anyone want anything to do with her?
sacman701 - May 28, 2010 | 2:50 pm · Link
Euro 3-way with Angela Merkel and Nicolas Sarkozy.
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 2:51 pm · Link
@jibeaux:
I’ve been shamelessly giggling about this for a while now. For more than one reason.
Which I will not go into here. At least until the WH releases their report on it first.
Short Bus Bully - May 28, 2010 | 2:51 pm · Link
Barbara Boxer weekend rendevous pleez. With the high rez pics.
Fenster - May 28, 2010 | 2:51 pm · Link
You all can have Chicken Lady (Lowden) and Bible Spice (Palin).
Elizabeth Kucinich and Krystal Ball. I’d love to be the dark meat in that sandwich.
YellowJournalism - May 28, 2010 | 2:52 pm · Link
OT but Gary Coleman has died. Poor, messed-up guy.
Quicksand - May 28, 2010 | 2:54 pm · Link
Gov. Jan Brewer.
RedKitten - May 28, 2010 | 2:55 pm · Link
Jesus Christ, I really should not have read this thread after eating lunch. I’m just picturing WAY too many unappealing people naked right now.
sukabi - May 28, 2010 | 2:56 pm · Link
@QuaintIrene: whatever happened to Darryl Kagan, the CNN hostess that he was diddling a while back… she seems to have disappeared.
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 2:57 pm · Link
@RedKitten: I’m naked right now.
Randy P - May 28, 2010 | 3:00 pm · Link
Somebody somewhere is getting a journal paper out of this thread. “Sexual pathologies in the modern liberal”, something like that.
poledancer - May 28, 2010 | 3:02 pm · Link
3 options…
1) Watching Coulter burying the wood in Cantor’s ass and listening to him scream with pleasure…
2) banging Michelle Malkin while wearing a Fidel Castro mask…
or 3) Bachman, Palin, a roll of duct tape a carry on bag full of meth and disposable cameras.
J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford - May 28, 2010 | 3:02 pm · Link
@Corner Stone:
Is this you?.
Patriot 3 - May 28, 2010 | 3:03 pm · Link
@brendancalling: for the best Ann Coulter article ever… “Soon she sat on my couch naked, gently pulling at her untrimmed pubic hair…” which for lack of bleach did not match the drapes…
Ash Can - May 28, 2010 | 3:03 pm · Link
This thread has been up for just two hours, and it’s attracted over 180 little pieces of sheer depravity. ::sigh:: I love this community. ::wipes tear::
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 3:05 pm · Link
@J.A.F. Rusty Shackleford: That fucking bitch! She promised to delete that!
She promised!!
arguingwithsignposts - May 28, 2010 | 3:06 pm · Link
FFS, it’s /b/alloon juice!
Corner Stone - May 28, 2010 | 3:07 pm · Link
@poledancer:
Chang Kai-shek mask.
Patriot 3 - May 28, 2010 | 3:10 pm · Link
@sacman701: and whatever you do, don’t forget to (a) substitute Nick’s super hot wife for Nick, and (b) massage Angela’s shoulders…to most her reaction may say ‘no’ but she really means ‘yes’ unless you’re W. and then it means ‘get the f**k away from me, asshole!’
RedKitten - May 28, 2010 | 3:14 pm · Link
@Corner Stone: Well, I usually assume that three-quarters of the commenters here are sans pants. But I certainly don’t need to imagine politicians that way.
Fred Fnord - May 28, 2010 | 3:21 pm · Link
Gary Coleman!
(What? Too soon?)
-fred